Ep. 011: Part I - Mastering the Art of Influence and Persuasion

Welcome to Bread to Lead Season 2.

First and foremost, I want to talk about all the great things that happened in Season 1. Our highest ranking on the U.S.
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You know, our leaders, we call them impact agents because a true leader can create impact and you're an agent of your most highest self. And God wants you to know that everything inside of you, each of us are bread to lead.
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And I promise that as you continue to rock with us on this journey, as we continue to drop episodes every single week. I want you to continue to just look forward to these nuggets and information, mentorship that you probably wish that you always had from someone who has been where you've been, that have built companies from the ground up, that now work with the second largest management and advisory firm in healthcare, specifically serving surgical sterilization departments.
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and more information than we have right now. So stay tuned, stay locked in, because this is Bread

to Lead. Let's get it.
welcome back to bread to lead the podcast this is your host dr jake taylor jacob and this podcast is dedicated to empowering you to unlock your

leadership potential and create lasting impact. Y'all listen, I'm thrilled to continue our journey of leadership, exploration, and growth together.
Listen, y'all are impact agents. And again, the whole purpose of this podcast is to change your life and give you things that you can actually apply, not only in your business and organizations that you serve, but the community in your life.

In our previous episode,

we delved deep into the critical skills of navigating change and cultivating resilience. We explored how leaders can not only survive, but thrive in the face of constant transformation, uncertainty, and complexity.
We discussed key strategies such as embracing a growth mindset, practicing self-awareness and self-regulation, cultivating strong support networks, finding purpose and meaning in our work, and developing adaptability and flexibility. These skills are foundational for any leader aiming to make a significant impact in today's rapidly evolving world.
But as we continue to build on this foundation, we recognize that effective leadership isn't just about personal resilience and adaptability. It's also about our ability to inspire, motivate, and guide others toward a shared vision and goal, which brings us to today's crucial topic, mastering the art of influence and persuasion.
At its core, leadership is about influence. It's about our capacity to shape ideas, behaviors, and outcomes, not through force or authority, but through inspiration, engagement, and alignment.
Whether we're leading a small team, a large organization, or a global movement, our effectiveness as leaders often comes down to our ability to influence others and win their genuine enthusiastic support for our vision and ideas. But here's the thing.
Influence and persuasion are often misunderstood and even feared in the context of leadership. Many people associate these terms with manipulation, coercion, or self-serving agendas.
They don't worry about, we don't worry, they worry that focusing on influence means compromising their authenticity or integrity. But nothing could be further from the truth.
When practiced ethically and skillfully, influence and persuasion are about creating win-win outcomes, aligning diverse interests towards a common good, and empowering others to see new possibilities and take positive action. They're about expanding perspectives, fostering collaboration, and catalyzing meaningful change.
In fact, I would argue that in today's complex interconnected world, the ability to influence effectively is not just a nice-to-have skill for leaders. It's an absolute necessity.
With flatter organizational structures, more diverse and distributed teams, and a growing emphasis on collaboration and consistence building, leaders can no longer rely solely on positional authority or top-down directives to get things done. Instead, we need to be able to win hearts and minds to inspire voluntary commitment and action, to navigate stakeholder landscapes and to build coalitions around shared goals and values we need to be able to communicate our ideas in ways that resonate deeply with others to listen empathetically and find common ground and to create the conditions for collective buy-in and engagement.
This is what true influence is about, and it's a skill that can be learned and practiced and mastered over time. So in today's episode, we're going to dive deep into the art and science of influence in persuasion, drawing on insights from psychology, neuroscience, communication theory, and the experiences of master influencers across various fields that we explore.
So there are seven things that we're going to explore as we're learning how to break down and master influence and persuasion. The first of the seven is the ethical foundations of influence and persuasion number two of seven is the psychology of influence number three is key principles and strategies for effective influence number four of seven is the role of emotional intelligence and persuasion number five is going to be mastering the art of storytelling for impact six overcoming resistance and handling objections.
And lastly, learning how to build long-term influence through trust and credibility. Whether you're trying to rally your team around a new initiative, win support for a bold idea, navigate complex stakeholder relationships, or even drive large-scale organizations or social change,

the insights and strategies we'll discuss today will help you become a more effective and ethical influencer. So let's dive in and start our exploration of this critical leadership skill.
So let's start with one. If you have not listened to my pod class, this is not a podcast.
This is a pod class, which means we take notes. We get better.
We write down things that stick out to us that we can apply into our lives. And then we share the information with others so that they can be able to dive deep.
If you are a leader listening to this call or an inspiring leader, you want to create conversations that you can be able to build upon.

This is the perfect podcast to share with your upline or your downline so you can start the conversation on what you can do to make your organization better, to create better leaders that can create lasting change. So write this down.
Number one is the ethical foundations of influence and persuasion. And I will tell you this right now, that today's class will be a long one because I want to make sure that you have the right information, especially when it comes to influence and persuasion, where it's not manipulation.
Having the true heart to do right by people for the better of people, but understanding that in order to get the things that you want in life, you have to learn how to curate your language and curate your conversations that makes people actually want to move into action. So number one, we're going to first talk about the ethical foundations of influence and persuasion and why it's important to write this down.
We're on number one, the ethical foundations of influence and persuasion. And before we dive into the strategies and techniques of influence, I believe it's crucial that we establish a strong ethical foundation for our approach.
Because the truth is, influence and persuasion are powerful tools. And like any powerful tool, they can be used for good or evil.
History is full of examples of individuals who have used persuasive techniques to manipulate, deceive, or exploit others for personal gain. From unscrupulous salespeople using high-pressure tactics to cult leaders exploiting psychological vulnerabilities.
The dark side of influence is all too real. But it's equally true that influence and persuasion have been used throughout history to drive positive change, inspire great achievements, and bring out the best in individuals and communities.
Think of Martin Luther King Jr.'s, I Have a Dream Dream speech or Nelson Mandela's ability to unite a divided nation or even Steve Jobs' knack for inspiring people to think differently. The difference in the intent, the method, and the outcomes of our influence efforts.
As leaders committed to making a positive impact, we need to approach influence and persuasion with a clear ethical framework that guides our actions and keeps us aligned with our values. So here are some key ethical principles to consider.
Integrity and authenticity. Respect for autonomy, mutual benefit, transparency, responsibility, empathy and care, continuous learning and improvement.
By grounding our influence efforts in these ethical principles, we can ensure that we are using our persuasive skills in ways that create genuine value, foster trust and respect, and contribute to the greater good. Moreover, this ethical approach actually enhances our effectiveness as influencers in the long run.
People are more willing and more likely to be genuinely persuaded and to maintain their commitment when they feel respected, valued, and authentically engaged. Trust and credibility.
The foundations of lasting influence are built through consistent ethical behavior over time. And as we move forward in our exploration of influence and persuasion techniques, I encourage you to keep these ethical principles in mind.
Use them as a compass to guide your decision and actions. Remember, the goal is not just to be an effective influencer, but to be an ethical and responsible one.
A leader who uses the power of persuasion to create positive change and to bring out the best in others. Number two, write this down.
The psychology of influence and understanding how and why people are persuaded. To become skilled influencers, we need to understand the

psychological principles that underlie human decision-making and behavior change. By grasping these fundamental dynamics, we can tailor our approach to more effectively resonate with and motivate others.
One of the most comprehensive frameworks for understanding the psychology of influence actually comes from Dr. Robert Caledini, a renowned psychologist and author of the seminal book Influence, the psychology of persuasion.
Caledini identifies six key principles of influence that can help explain why people say yes to requests. And later on, he added another one.
We'll talk about it in the pod class. The first one was reciprocity.
The second one was commitment and consistency. Third, social proof.
Fourth, liking. Fifth, authority.
Sixth, scarcity. And seventh, unity.
Understanding these principles can help us craft more persuasive messages and create environments that facilitate positive influence. However, it's crucial to use this knowledge ethically and responsibly, always with the intent of creating mutual benefit and respecting others autonomy.
Beyond Caledini's principles, there are several other psychological factors that play into influence and persuasion. One is farming.
How information is presented can significantly impact how it's received and acted upon. For instance, framing a choice in terms of potential gains versus potential losses can lead to different decisions, even when the objective outcomes are the same.
Cognitive biases. Our brain uses various mental shortcuts to process information quickly, which can lead to systematic errors in

judgment. Understanding common biases like confirmation bias, anchoring, or the availability heuristic can help us both avoid being unduly swayed by them and craft more persuasive arguments.
emotionalotional appeal. While logic and reason are important, emotions often play a crucial role in decision making.
Effective influencers understand how to engage both the heart and the mind. Self-perception and identity.
People are more likely to be persuaded by arguments and requests that align with their self-image and values We tend to act in ways that are consistent with how we see ourselves Timing and context When and how a message is delivered can be just as important as its content Understanding the right moment and setting for influence attempts is a very crucial skill to master. And lastly, the power of story.
Human beings are wired to respond to narratives. Stories can bypass our analytical defenses and connect with us on a deeper, more emotional level, which is why you see some of the greatest marketing and advertisement campaigns often tie in a story that compels to your heart, your mind, and your spirit, overriding any logical decisions that may cause you from making a decision to say yes or no.
Now you're mostly tied into the story, which curates a behavior or an action that moves to the detriment of you or to the growth of you. By understanding these psychological principles, we can become more intentional and effective in our influence efforts.
We can craft messages that resonate more deeply, create environments that facilitate positive change, and build relationships that foster trust and openness to ideas. However, it's important to remember that influence is not about manipulating the psychological levers to get what we want.
Instead, it's about understanding human nature so we can communicate more effectively, build stronger connections, and create alignment around shared goals and values. As leaders, our aim should be to use these insights to bring out the best in others, to help them see new possibilities, and to inspire them to take positive action.
When we approach influence with this same mindset, one of service, empathy, and mutual benefit, we can create powerful lasting change that elevates everyone involved. Number three, write it down.
Key principles and strategies for effective influence. Now that we've established an ethical foundation and explored the psychology of influence, let's dive into some key principles and strategies that can enhance our ability to persuade and inspire others.
And we're going to start with why. Inspired by Simon Sinek's work, this principle emphasizes the importance of communicating the purpose and vision behind our ideas or requests.
People are more likely to be influenced when they understand

and connect with the underlining why rather than just the what or the how. After the why, then we focus on inspiring people and influencing people through strategy.
Before attempting to influence, clearly articulate your purpose. What's the bigger picture? How does this align with shared values or goals?

Communicate this vision in a way that resonates emotionally and rationally. After the why, and after giving the strategy, now build rapport and trust.
Influence is built on foundation of Trust positive relationships.

Believe people are more likely to be open to your ideas when they feel a genuine connection with this. And the strategy to do that is to invest time and build relationships.
Practice active listening, show genuine interest in others, find common ground, and consistently demonstrate integrity in your words and your actions. And after we develop that strategy of starting with your why and the strategy of building rapport and trust, now we need to build on getting them to understand and address the needs that we're trying to serve.
Effective influence involves understanding the needs, motivations, and concerns of those we're trying to persuade. By addressing these directly, we create win-win solutions.
Ask yourself, am I asking good enough questions? Am I listening deeply enough to understand others' perspectives? Am I looking for ways to align my proposal with their needs and goals? And am I willing to adapt our approach based on what I've learned from their responses? Then after understanding and addressing their needs, we now need to use the power of social proof. As we discussed earlier, people often look to others to guide their decisions in action.
Leveraging social proof can be a powerful influence strategy. We have to learn how to share examples of others who have successfully adopted similar ideas or taken similar actions.
Use testimonials, case studies or statistics that demonstrate broader support or success. Most people are followers.
They're sheep. They follow other people that they feel like have more influence than them.
So we leverage other people that they look up to, other people that they admire, other people that they aspire to be like as our social proof to guide people to see and say, hey, listen, if they have worked with us, here's their result.

And this goes back into storytelling. If I just tell somebody what I do, I'm just giving them a

list of things I do. But if I show them what I've done, now they can see themselves and they can put

themselves in the seat or in the shoes of those people that I walk through. One of the best

to get... But if I show them what I've done, now they can see themselves and they can put themselves in the seat or in the shoes of those people that I walk through.
One of the best examples I love is in Scripture when Yahshua was actually showing people, not just telling people the decrees and the laws of God, the universe. He's actually showing them through action.
he's he's he's he's showing them through storytelling of of things that they can connect with so that they can be able to see hey if he was able to do that and they were able to do that i see their case study i see their testimony i see their statistics and because of that i can in fact do the same thing because in in short, a lot of people are influenced to move forward with anything because they can't see themselves doing it, too. So they cause all of these restrictions and they push back a lot simply because they can't see themselves doing it either.
But if you can show them people that you've worked with that are similar to who they are getting results it will literally invoke them to say hey if they can do it i can do it because think about it the people that we look up to the reason that we look up to it is not because they do so amazing things it's simply because we see ourselves in them and we find people that we see ourselves in and we completely buy in to the framework of if they can, I can. Because there are similarities in ability or maybe upbringing or maybe behaviors that make us see, hey, I can do that, too.
That's why sharing examples are important. Framing for impact.
How we present information can significantly affect how it's received and acting upon. Learning how to skillfully frame can make our ideas more compelling and more persuasive.
And a way to do that is to consider different ways to frame your message. Would emphasizing potential gains be more effective than focusing on avoiding losses? Can you connect your ideas to values or identities that resonate with your audience? I like to consider myself multilingual, not because I can speak multiple languages, but because I can speak to different types of people in the same language.
It's nothing that hurts you more as a leader than to be one dimensional in the way that you communicate. Where you're making everyone assimilate to how you communicate and not assimilating to other people ways of communication.
The best way to connect to somebody is the way that they already naturally speak and more importantly the way that they speak to themselves. So depending on who I'm talking to I'm you may hear my country twain come out because I'm country for real from Texas.
Or if I'm talking to somebody in a boardroom that may be from the East Coast that may think that people in the South are slower, you may hear me annunciate better and pronounce it better and lower my twang away so I can communicate to them in a way that they actually want to be communicated with. But if I'm talking to people that come from where I come from, you hear my twang, you hear my swang, you hear a little bit of my slang, because this is the way that I talk on a normal basis.
But if I need to be able to connect to people, you have to connect to people in the ways that they want to be communicated with. The more successful you are at connecting with the people in their natural slang, their natural twang, their natural talk, the more diverse you become.
And the more diverse you become, the more impactful you become. The more impactful you become, the more you become needed.
And the more that you are needed, the value and the equity value of who you are and the impact that you have goes to the moon. And there's no check.
There's no offer. There's no promotion.
There's nothing that you can't ask for that won't be given to you when you're diverse in the way that you communicate and frame your impact. The next one is to create a sense of urgency and scarcity.
People are motivated by fear of missing out or the desire to seize limited opportunities. You got to start to highlight time sensitive aspects of your proposal or limited availability of resources.
Be careful not to create a false sense of urgency. But but do emphasize genuine time constraints or unique opportunities.
I think this is important. You ask for a promotion or trying to get a contract or you're trying to leverage your ability to do things.
Hey, listen, people want to work with busy people. And the more available you are with time, the more I realize that you really probably aren't as impactful as you are because people who are impactful typically don't have a lot of time.
So if I'm asking for a promotion, I'm asking for a raise. I already know my value that I bring the organization and the value I can bring someone else.
So I would leverage the fact that, hey, listen, I want to be here, but I don't have forever in my life for you to decide if you want me to be here. And I'm okay.
And guess what, guys, in order to truly create a sense of urgency, you have to be willing to walk away from the table. You have to be a willing to way to walk away from the company.
You have to be willing to walk away from the deal. You have to be willing to walk away from the table.
You have to be a willing to walk away from the company. You have to be willing to walk away from the deal.
You have to be willing to walk away from the relationship so that people can see your sense of urgency and your pride that you have in delivering on what you say that you're going to do and then calling them to the table to deliver on what they said they will. Y'all listen, I'm never scared to walk away from the table.
I'm never scared to walk away from a deal. I'm never scared to walk away from equity.
I'm never scared to walk away from consistent income because one thing I cannot afford is for someone to think that I will always be available to them when in fact I know my value that I bring the world, the marketplace. So no, I'm not always available.
In this moment, I am available to you. But just like anyone in a relationship, treat me right.
Treat me good. I'll give you the world.

If I feel like that you're playing with me

I feel like that you're playing with my future

I feel like that you're just saying things just to get along and get along

That's when you'll start to see things kind of change

And when they change it's hard to get them back

Because I've already moved on

Because I've learned in life that I have to believe the way that people treat me

When I see how they're treating me and how they treat me on the onset is how they are and how they'll see me. And it's nothing that I can do to change, to change how they're seeing me in the beginning.
So believe how people treat you, because that's always how they'll treat you. They may push it back.
They may hold it. They may smile.
They may fist bump you. They may slap your hands.
They may even celebrate wins with you. But deep down inside, they still feel the same way.
So believe it and move accordingly. the next thing I want you to learn how to do is use the principle of reciprocity.
As Khaledini pointed out, people tend to want to return favors. Learning how to provide value first is important.
We can increase the likelihood of positive reception to our ideas. So you want to learn how to look for ways to help or provide value to others before making requests.
This could be through sharing useful information, offering assistance, or simply being supportive. One of the favorite things I've learned from some of the greatest businessmen, both pharmaceutical reps in the streets or astute businessmen that that done it the right way.
The greatest business models give some version of their services free for a taste. You have to let go of that payment wall that you have.
Meaning if I want a promotion, I need to show my capacity and my capability before I ask for money before I actually can show my capability. Sometimes you have to give a little bit more than you're getting so that you can prove to yourself your capacity and capability and to those that you want for them to take you seriously.
If there's always a payment wall in between your ability to show the best of you, it's always going to be hard for you to close that deal. But when you give people a taste of who you are at a discounted or free or or or or a negotiated lower value of yourself and you give them more than they ever seen now when you come back to the table for negotiations it's not going to be any pushback because they've seen your ability and they want they're going to want to keep you i see so many people lose out on getting promotions simply because they're holding out to get the promotion before they show their ability what good is it for me to be promoting someone that i haven't even seen if they're capable of the next position name me one seed that you can plant in the ground and do no work and then immediately it's just going to be all of a sudden and next couple of days giving a bunch of fruit and apples to you think about it it doesn't make sense there's nothing that god created that's natural that doesn't take a seed in your work first before you can get a plentiful unlimited fruit from whatever tree or whatever you're trying to get fruit or vegetables from the same thing works you have to put in the work first have to show yourself.
You have to give and be in the spirit of reciprocity and trust that the average numbers of you giving and doing right unto others and giving them value for you, you'll end up winning lifelong people that will simply be supportive and give you opportunities because they'll never forget what you've done for them. Here's another principle to learn to master.
Leveraging the power of commitment and consistency. Once people have committed to an idea or an action, even in a small way, they're more likely to follow through and expand on that commitment.
One of the best strategies to use is to start with small, easy to agree with requests or ideas. Once you gained initial commitment, you can build out this foundation toward larger goals.
I think a lot of people over promise and under deliver. Yeah, I said it.
I think that a lot of people have good intentions to create great, grandiose ideas, and then they think that they're going to change the world. But in truth, the greatest among us know that the great ideas are broken down into small bullet points that we can actually execute.
It is the most beautiful and magical thing to see a baby birth from a woman, but it didn't happen like that immediately. There were small things that happened that grew throughout the time of that baby being in a womb before it actually was created it's a beauty to see that apple trees you can pull the apple off the tree and it just grows back magically but that's not how it started and all great things start with small commitments and learning how to create things in bite sizes yes i know you want to transform your organization yes i know you want to change the world, I know you want to transform your organization.

Yes, I know you want to change the world.

Yes, I know you want to change your community.

But first, start with small things that you can commit to, that you can consistently beat.

That builds up people's trust with you.

And that initial commitment that you're building now grows a foundation that helps you work toward larger goals that people believe that you can actually execute on. The next skill that you have to learn is learning how to appeal to emotional reason.
While data and logic are important, decisions are often driven by emotions. Effective influence involves engaging both the heart and the mind.
We have to learn how to use stories and analogies and vivid language to create emotional connection and then back it up with data and logic. Too many people use logic for their arguments and don't realize it's the storytelling that wraps people in.
The best way to feed medicine to your child is not medicine directly. It's medicine in the food.
All these different things that you can hide in order to be able to get them what they need while also serving them what they want. And the best example of that are the greatest leaders in the world were actually really great orators, right? Great writers where they can lock you into a story and have you so consumed in the story that you buy into the mission of the story because you saw yourself in it.
The next skill that you have to learn is learning how to overcome objections. Every time, just because somebody is giving you some type of pushback doesn't mean that you stop.
The best way to overcome an objection is to honestly put yourself in the other person's shoes and think through all the possible objections and to address them preemptively in your communication. It shows that you have considered different perspectives.
One of the best things I tell people is that understand who you're communicating and talking to and then put yourself in the shoes of that person and communicate to them from the level of the lens of which they're probably looking at you. Most people just want to be heard, felt, understood, and seen.
Heard, felt, understood, and seen. So if I can ensure that I can have you hear me, feel me, understand, and I can see you, that odds of you getting actually any type of resistance with the things that you want will be slimmer to none.
Another skill of mastery is using the contrast principle. Our perceptions are often relative rather than obsolete, meaning by strategically using contrast, we can make up ideas or proposals that seem more attractive.
Example, there's a strategy. Consider presenting your idea alongside a less attractive alternative or start with a more extreme request before presenting your actual proposal.
Right. And this makes it seem more reasonable, more reasonable by comparison.
And these are just things that you can use to get people to actually see your value by what you could charge or what what what the market is saying that you have and then presenting what you need to. But all of these strategies that we're using from create alignment through similarity to the use of power and authority by expertise, you know, the use of principle of unity, building things collectively together.
We must remember that these principles and strategies are just tools, not manipulative tactics. The key is to use them ethically and in service of creating genuine value and positive outcomes from all that's involved.
Effective influence is not about getting people to do what we want at any cost, but about creating alignment, inspiring action, and achieving mutually beneficial results. As you apply these strategies, always keep in mind that the ethical foundations we discussed earlier use these tools to enhance your ability to communicate effectively, build stronger relationships, and create positive change.
When applied with integrity and genuine care for others, these influential strategies can significantly enhance your leadership impact and help you drive meaningful progress towards your goals. This will be the conclusion of part one.
Part one of this episode. We're going to do three parts of this episode because I really want to spend a lot of time on this.
I want you to take time and I want you to take it in bite sizes and apply the information that we learned and then use it to actually master the skill set in the art of influence and persuasion. One of the best things I love about this podcast is because I can take my time actually teaching you things that you can apply to your life so you can see dramatic change.
That's the key. All of us are called to be a leader to what capacity is up to you to decide.
We all are bred to lead. You just have to see yourself being the leader that God sees you being.
If you're listening to this podcast, you're watching some of our content, you know deep down inside, something is calling you for something greater. So go and get our newest book, Bread to Lead.
Tell people about our podcast. Give a review of the impact that you're having from the podcast.
But most importantly, come back next week so that you can get part two, part three, and continue to develop that muscle that you have because you are Bread to Lead. I am your host, Dr.
Jake Taylor Jacobs, and I love you and

there's nothing you can do about it. But what I want you to do right now, I want you to take the

information that you have. I want you to go and be the greatest human being that you can become.

And by being the greatest human being you can become, by default, you will have to become a

great leader. Peace.