Don't Mind | Cruxmont | Ep. 3

Hello and welcome back to Don't Mind Croxmont.

I'm K.A.

Stats, the writer and creator.

And I'm Travis Vengroff, the producer and director, and together we are Fool and Scholar Productions.

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Previously, on Don't Mind Cruxmont, Neil discovered that the body in the road was nothing more than a prank pulled by the local teenagers of Cruxmont, but spotted that one of them had something that belonged to his missing brother Colin.

Unable to chase them at the time, Neil and Dr.

Kingston drove into the village and booked rooms at the Fox and Bloom.

At 4 a.m., Dr.

Kingston woke Neil, and together they followed a light across the field to find the teenagers of Cruxmont and look for clues into Colin's whereabouts.

Aggravated, Neil chased down a teenager wearing Colin's jacket and learned that Colin was spotted in the Orchard Hills a week ago.

All the while, Gwen crossed the hills in search of a distraught teenage girl.

Don't mind Cruxmont

Excuse me.

Where are you going?

Amy's friend.

Wait,

running in a field at night.

Hello?

Are you out here?

Oh, god, that noise.

It's getting further away.

Hey, hey,

are you okay?

It's only me from earlier.

It looks like your friend Amy was feeling better before she went home.

You don't worry about it too much.

I'm fine.

Really?

Really?

I usually keep a watch on her, but

I just got a lot to think about when I didn't check on her this time.

What What I usually do, okay?

Tonight we're different, and I know that, but it's usually not that bad.

Oh, God.

Are you sure she'll be all right?

Listen, she's young, and she was already asleep for a while, so I think most of the alcohol is already in her system, or out of it.

Water, food, and a terrible hangover.

Then she should be back to normal.

That's good.

What is that?

Foxes.

Oh, of course.

Is there something else on your mind?

Why aren't you at home?

It's nearly 5am.

Don't you have school tomorrow?

No, we...

We don't.

Crooks wants us for a bit to prepare for the festival.

Everyone's part of it.

What's your name?

Millie.

Okay.

Well, Millie, I'm Gwen.

What's so special about this place, then, Millie?

Why come here?

I like to throw rocks into the pond.

I like the way they disappear under the water.

Do you need help getting home?

If you're still feeling drunk, I'm not.

I don't drink.

I just pretend to, because Jeff is so stupid.

He'll get us all into trouble if one of us isn't sober.

Besides, drinking doesn't fix everything.

Or anything, for that matter.

So,

what's on your mind, Millie?

You shouldn't have come here.

It's not time for the festival yet, and you should leave.

Nothing else to do here, anyways.

I don't plan to be in town for long.

Just a few days.

Good.

What's going on, Millie?

Nothing you can help with.

You're not my mum.

I know I'm not your mother, mother, so I don't have any right to ask, but sometimes that makes it easier.

I'm also a doctor, so perhaps that helps.

Are you sure you're okay?

No.

No, I'm not okay.

This town...

Jeff is horrible.

Amy's a ding.

My parents are perfectly happy staying here in their boring little lives.

And I can't leave.

You can.

So go on.

Leave.

Leave.

Just get in your car and just whatever and just leave.

You get home.

Millie, calm down.

No, I won't.

Get out.

Leave.

Just leave me alone, would you?

What?

Softy southern doctor doesn't understand me, eh?

Leave me alone.

There's nothing I could do.

No, anyone could do except Lee.

Just leave.

Hey, hey, hey, hey.

Be careful.

Fine.

I'll go.

But you should go home.

Talk to someone, Millie.

Sitting out here getting upset helps no one, least of all you.

Listen,

if you need someone to talk to, I am staying at the Fox and Bloom.

At least for the next night.

Okay, okay.

Good morning.

Oh, uh good morning.

Who are you?

I'm Neil.

You're not from the village, Neil.

What are you doing out here so early?

Some local teenagers pranked me and put a dummy in the road in front of my car.

Uh, well, not my car, but the car I was in.

We thought someone was injured.

Jeff.

Yeah, that little ringleader.

Um, anyways, I just had a conversation with him.

A conversation about what exactly?

Who are you?

I'm P.C.

Garden, and I'm trying to figure out why a random American man has shown him in our village to harass the local kids on Orchard property, too.

No, no, that

them nearly killing us.

Us?

Ah, my friend.

well, actually, I just met her.

She's a doctor.

She drove me into town.

She was...

She was driving, and we had to stop because of the dummy.

But it worked out because the kid,

Jeff, was wearing something that belonged to my brother.

You're making no sense, friend.

Slow down.

I came to Cruxmont to look for my brother Colin.

He was here.

Look,

see, this here is his jacket.

And Jeff saw him over the hill.

My brother Colin has been missing for about a week.

And he was last spotted here in Cruxmont.

That's why I'm here.

So you're telling me you stole Jeff's jacket?

No, but I took Colin's jacket back from Jeff.

Look, Neil, this is a small village.

I can't have strangers coming in here and harassing the local children.

Do you understand?

No,

yeah, that's fine.

I...

I don't need to talk to them anymore.

I just have to ask about Colin and get his jacket back.

Besides, when we got to them, one of the girls was passed out drunk on the grass.

The doc got her up and talking and gave her some water.

Seemed like she would be fine, but it's not like these kids were out all night being upstanding citizens.

Which girl?

Amy.

Her cousin took her back home.

Alright, thank you.

But if there was a missing kid in Croxmont...

Colin's not a kid.

He's 27.

Here,

I have a picture of him.

Lots, actually.

He looks a lot like me, and he's filled out a bit since that photo.

But that's him.

Have you seen him?

Jeff said he was in town about a week ago.

Not in town, but over on the hill over there.

Oh, and he may have some facial hair by now.

A week?

He's probably long gone by now.

Unless you live here, there's no reason to be in this village for more than a couple of days.

More so when it's not the festival.

So you haven't seen him.

Where are you staying?

Fox and Blue?

I can walk you back.

We can look at a map, see where he might have headed, and I can make some calls to other towns, see if anyone has seen him.

If you're at the Fox and Blue, I'll leave a message with Mary if I find out anything.

Thanks.

That would be great.

But maybe a rain check on the sit-down.

I need a...

Couple more hours of sleep and Mary said there's breakfast in the pub, so

I'm gonna be occupied for the next couple hours.

Um, there's probably a reason why you're up this early, so I don't mean to distract you.

And uh, to double-check, PC means police captain or something.

Police constable.

And yes, I do have somewhere to be.

Just tell Mary to give me a call when you want some help.

Sorry you didn't find your brother.

You know, he may have just been out hiking, but keep looking.

Maybe he hitched a lift over to somewhere like Penrith or Carlisle, or even up to Newcastle.

Much more exciting than here, Newcastle.

Yeah,

maybe.

Good morning, then.

Morning.

I'll be about.

Taylor.

Taylor, hi, it's me.

It's Gwen.

Uh, um, I'm using a land line.

When are you coming back?

I'm fine, thank you for asking.

Yes, sorry, uh, hope all is well.

How was the drive?

Have you tried any plums yet?

Now, when are you coming back?

You were right about last night.

Me, right?

Haha.

So, you know, nothing new then?

Uh, a bit.

I drove for so long that I stopped paying attention to the road.

And the car into a bush.

Everything's fine, though I nearly crashed into a man.

The guy you sent me the photo of?

Well, I'm glad everything's all right.

Yeah.

Uh,

I got in late last night, uh, and I haven't had time to look around properly yet.

I still don't know when I'll be back, but, um, but I wanted to check in on Adelaide.

Did you only just wake up?

Uh,

I told you.

Excuse me, I had a late night and an earlier morning.

Put back to bed for some extra sleep.

Nine?

I can't remember the last time I got to sleep in until nine.

Feels like a little holiday.

Now, um,

so, how's Adelaide?

A picture of perfection.

She's fully alert and responsive.

Hard to believe she suffers from anything at all except the aches of old age.

Her wrist is still a bit sore, but otherwise fine.

If anything, she's a bit evasive.

She seems to remember everything, but she certainly isn't sharing it with us.

Yeah,

I got that feeling when I spoke with her as well.

Can you ring me through to her room?

Yes, of course.

Please hold.

And uh, don't forget that pummeline.

Miss Birch, it's Dr.

Kingston.

Hello, Gwen.

How are you today?

I'm well, Adelaide.

But that's really the question I'm meant to be asking you.

How are you feeling today?

Oh, just fine.

The bees are back in the garden, so I took my morning tea outside before it got too warm.

Are you working today?

Do I have another appointment?

I don't think I've forgotten anything.

I'm sure I would have remembered if I'd.

No, you've not forgotten, Adelaide.

I just wanted to check in with you.

So I'm out of town.

I won't be back for a few days, but I may have Nurse Taylor book another scan for you.

Just to look in on all the changes we saw.

Are you on holiday?

Yep, for a few days.

That's nice.

Uh down the coast, the days are getting warmer.

Uh, no, actually.

I'm up north.

In Crooksmont.

Leave.

Cruxmont, Gwen.

Now.

There is nothing for you there, trust me.

Did they bring you something from Cruxmont?

Your family, maybe?

Perhaps Mary?

It's a small village, Gwen.

But Cruxmont has nothing worth bothering with.

It's better to let sleepy places like that stay asleep.

It all seems very normal so far.

Teenage pranks and angst, little pubs and fruit fields.

The orchards are beautiful this morning.

I can see them out the window.

I'm at the Fox and Bloom.

Do you know it?

Leave

and stay away.

Adelaide?

Huh.

Well then.

Good morning.

Um, do you ever get any signal in here?

Sorry, dear.

Bit of a dead zone all around.

But we've got Wi-Fi.

Networks called Fox and BloomNet.

Passwords plum all, capital P and A, no space.

Okay, thanks.

Oh, plum cakes, toast, and plum jam.

Not a disappointment, but not a surprise.

Tea?

Oh!

Neil, hi, good morning.

I got a pot.

English breakfast.

Mind if I join you?

Uh, that of course not.

So, did you uh did you find anything out about your brother last night?

Yeah, the

the kid saw Colin here about a week ago,

so he's the last to have seen him so far.

And he picked up the jacket on one of the orchard hills.

Got it back too.

Hmm.

You uh, you don't seem overly joyous at this news?

Well,

my brother's still missing, so it's no mission-accomplished situation.

What about you?

Sorry, I ran off and left you in the field alone.

I didn't really think about it.

Uh,

I'm fine.

I uh I went to look for the other girl.

She seemed deeply unhappy, but there was nothing I could do.

Uh, I came straight back to the pub after that and got a few more hours of much-needed uh sleep.

And I ran into the local constable, which first I find hilarious because I didn't really remember that constables were a thing.

But also, second, and not so funny, I don't think he likes me very much.

Well, I mean, I heard you threaten a teenager, Neil.

Yes, okay.

I won't do that again.

So, um,

what are you here for again?

Your previous answer was vague at best.

If you're comfortable sharing, I guess.

Your business is your business.

I can tell you.

No names, though.

Doctor Patient Confidentiality.

Yeah, of course.

I'm uh I'm a neurologist, focusing mostly on geriatric studies and the degradation of the brain and central nervous system due to aging and aging-associated diseases like Alzheimer's

or dementia.

So, if I had broken my arm getting hit by a car,

I would have known what to do, but maybe wouldn't have done it terribly well.

For my best work, I think you'd need a head wound.

Anyway, I've been working with the patient.

No memory, limited verbal communication, severe motor skill malfunction.

She was kind, but completely lost.

Did you pass on?

No.

That's the thing.

She recovered miraculously for no discernible reason except

one night.

She received a visitor, and the next day, just like that,

she was back.

She was speaking and joking around and could recall the smallest details and her childhood memories.

Your words sound good, but the tone is confusing.

Miraculous recoveries don't help anyone but the singular recipient.

But

if I can find out how the miracle happened, maybe I can help others move from miracle to cure.

So, so I hear.

So,

the only thing that changed for the patient that I've determined so far was that she received a visitor the night before her recovery, and the visitor brought a basket filled with gifts from

Cruxmont's Orchards.

And since this place doesn't sell too far outside of town and doesn't have a huge online presence,

you came to look for the visitor in person.

Exactly.

I'll be honest, seems like a long shot.

Or just a really weak clue.

Yeah, I know.

But I have to follow it.

I have to try.

So, what can I get for you?

Uh, how big are the scones?

Oh, about this big, or so.

You know, we put those on the menu just around time for the festival.

And mostly for you, Americans, with your liking for sweets.

Well, thank you then, because they sound great.

Two scones with jam, and uh orange juice, please.

And the uh toast combo for me and another pot of tea to share right away

So uh what's your plan?

I'll pay a visit to the local shop see if maybe they stock some of that jam find out if anyone bought some recently.

I have a name, so hopefully someone should know them.

See if I can find them, talk to them.

Well, if your patient remembers everything, why not ask her?

Ah, well, she's being rather tight-lipped on the subject.

She avoids anything related to Crooksmont.

She's made it very clear that she doesn't think I should be here.

She told me not to come.

And when she found out I was here this morning, she told me to leave.

She refused to say anything else when I asked.

But she knows something.

Say what?

I don't know.

The village is small, but I didn't get a good feeling yesterday.

Or this morning.

Last night, after we checked in and walked upstairs, I could hear Mary talking on the phone all sneaky ass.

Guns for you.

Toast combo for the doctor.

And tea.

Thank you.

I'll be right back with the juice.

One up of tea.

Thank you.

Looks great.

Did you hear me?

Gwen?

She called me Doctor.

How did she find out I'm a doctor?

Um

is it on the ID you gave her last night?

Nope.

I think she's eavesdropping.

I mean

eavesdropping is with intention.

She might have just overheard us.

Just a moment ago, you said she was being sneaky last night.

Yeah, it was...

It was the middle of the night.

We were all being a little sneaky.

I mean, we both snuck out last night.

It's not sneaking out.

We aren't teenagers.

We're adults staying at an inn.

There is nothing keeping us here.

No curfew.

Anything else I can get for you?

Oh!

We'd love to see more of the village.

Where is everyone today, anyway?

Well, most folk are in church about now, since we hold several extra services before the Plum Festival.

Afterwards, everyone will start work on the festival, though the orchards won't open to tours or the like until the weekend.

But please remember, you need to be out of Cruxmont by the weekend.

Did we make that clear?

Uh why by the weekend?

I just wanted to remind you that you only have the roots for tonight, and the rest of town is booked up at this time of year, I'm afraid.

Of course.

That's no problem.

Thank you.

So the Plum Festival is a big deal.

You could say that, yes.

The whole town gets involved.

The orchards are opened up to the public, which only happens but once a year.

Well, you've seen the trees.

Even at night, they are beautiful.

Yeah, they really are.

It seems like the village could make a lot more than just a single weekend out of it.

The orchards would attract photographers and influencers in droves with the right advertising.

We're all right with just the one weekend, thank you.

All Hills has been in business for generations, and the trees are carefully tended.

Tourism is money, but it's also destructive.

Those trees are our heritage.

We'd rather protect it.

Oh, that's understandable and commendable.

It's a delicate ecosystem.

It is.

Um, all hills?

All hills orchard.

The all hill family has been at the center of our village as far back as we can remember.

Ah,

and uh, protecting the trees.

That's why they only open one field.

Yes, that one field is fitted with more protection for the trees, and as a general, more prepared for guests.

We can't have people trampling about where they please.

So, how do the villagers participate?

Oh, helping out in the pub, mining stalls, tending the events, cleaning, setting them.

Everything done by our little village.

The children get off from school to design the sheer signs or prepare stalls and lug hay bales about, or whatever.

All wonderful activities.

Sorry you couldn't get a room, but they book up months in advance.

Perhaps the space the next town.

Oh, excuse me, duty calls.

Thank you.

That guy that just walked in?

That's Gordon, the constable.

I don't feel like speaking to him, so I'm gonna go back upstairs.

Take a quick shower and then head over to the church and pass out some flyers.

I can meet you out front in about half an hour if you want company.

Yeah, thanks.

I'll see you then.

You're late.

I wanted to make sure you were down here.

Do you want any reason to stop for a chat?

Was the policeman really that upsetting?

Something off about what he said.

About Colin continuing on or something like that.

Like he was trying to push me off to the next town.

Okay.

Well, shall we?

Which way?

Well, there's only one road.

Might as well walk along it.

Right.

Reminds me of those pictures of Japan.

All Hills Orchard.

I wonder how many acres this is.

But that's it.

Everything here and everything that I found in my patient's room, it came from these

trees.

Oh,

the general store's right there.

Uh, want to stop in and ask about the purchases?

Look, here, honesty box.

Please drop money inside, we know

Creepy.

And that would never work in the US.

At least not

in my town.

So anyone could have just picked up the items and walked off.

And no one would know who bought it.

Not even a receipt.

So maybe they won't know.

But maybe they will.

You don't know how long that box has been up.

But we don't know until we ask.

No one is here, so let's try the church.

Maybe the shopkeeper's over there.

Oh, wait.

Can you see that?

There's something over there.

Hmm?

Up there.

Three rows in from the first set of trees on the hill.

It's at the base of that tree.

Uh, like a little doll?

I'm gonna take a closer look.

The signs.

The signs say stay out of the orchard.

Then you don't have to go in the orchard.

I am, though.

How far are you going in?

Until I can tell what it is.

Neil,

look.

What is it?

Is that normal?

Shit.

Where did you come from?

The orchard.

My orchard.

Which is not currently open to the public.

Can't you read it?

Yes, sorry, sorry.

We will be on our way.

But what is this?

That's a debris pit.

Rotten leaves, branches, spoiled plums.

Anything we could find that doesn't match the aesthetic goal of our orchard here for the festival rolls in.

Huh.

And it's one of the many reasons you should have done what the signs said.

If you'd fallen in there, well, getting you out is one thing.

Getting the stench off you would be another.

We'll go back to the road.

Sorry to have disturbed the orchard, Mr.

Allhill.

If it's dangerous, shouldn't be fenced off before the festival?

Roger.

And it will be later today.

Most of my farmhands are still in church.

It'll all be ready in time for the festival.

And that?

Upon the hill?

The figurine.

The older kids make those and hide them in the fields for the little ones to find during the festival.

Sort of a tradition.

Figurines of the fox.

They take them home after, brings them good luck.

Where are you headed?

Church, actually.

I'm meeting my men there.

I'll walk with you.

It's not far.

What are you doing in town?

The festival's not until the weekend.

I don't mean to be rude, but we don't get many strangers here.

We like it that way.

So do our orchards.

I'm looking for my brother, Colin.

No,

keep the flyer.

I have more.

He's missing?

For a week now.

And you, friend of Colin?

Friend of the family.

Well, good luck, and I'll keep an eye out for him.

Would hate to miss family myself, so all the best to you.

Thanks.

This way.

Oh,

it's beautiful.

It certainly is.

Now, excuse me, I don't want to miss the end of service.

Should be announcements about festival updates.

Nice church.

It's small, though.

A little village like this doesn't need a big church.

Neil,

look at this.

What's up?

And when does church usually let out?

Is it an on-the-hour kind of thing?

Have you looked at the headstones?

The graves?

No.

I have no intention of reading some clack-to-curse off of a tombstone in the English backcountry.

What?

Just look.

The graves have a massive range of styles.

Some are new, others look ancient.

That just sounds like graves.

Yeah, well, yes, but I didn't finish explaining it.

There are no dates.

Look.

No dates.

No birthdays?

No deaths?

Not even a year.

Um, that one, uh.

George Greg Greg, Gregor,

something.

It has a date.

Down there.

Oh, uh, can you read it?

Uh.

145.

It starts with a one.

Illegible.

All the older ones with dates are illegible, and everything else is lacking.

Oh, this one's new.

Uh, no dates.

Huh.

I'm guessing that's not normal for England.

No.

I'm gonna look around.

I'll be here.

I wanna pass out flyers when the uh

session gets out.

Hello there.

Odd to see two new faces in a day around here.

Who are you?

Up

the person you startled in in a graveyard.

Sorry, but I know everyone in this congregation, and I don't know you.

I know you.

You're the constable.

Well, I couldn't tell from the uniform.

I saw you at the Fox and Bloom earlier when you stopped in for breakfast.

PC Norgarden.

And you are.

interested in this church.

It is beautiful.

Let me be a bit more direct.

What's your name?

And what are you doing here?

I know you arrived with the American.

Are you looking for his last brother as well?

Gwen.

And no, but I am looking for someone.

Do you know an Edith Birch?

Excuse me.

I have to go speak with the others.

But if I may, this is a small village, and word gets around.

We can help you find what you're looking for, but please don't harass the people here, like your friend did earlier.

I'm not here to hurt anyone, quite the opposite, actually.

I'm a doctor.

Great.

Why are you hunting?

The constable's here.

I know.

I just spoke to him.

How did that go

strangely?

Look,

there's the farmer.

I met those people, the ones staying at the fox and blue.

They were in the orchard.

Where?

Near the pit in the first orchard.

They were investigating a figurine of the fox.

You bought one of those flyers, too.

Yes.

Looks like the young lad has made a lot of them.

He plans to hand them out.

We don't have time for this.

Not now.

Not before the festive.

Not with everything happening now.

Have you spoken to Mary?

She knows everything is booked for the festival.

They shouldn't be here long.

I'll make sure they're right.

Don't Mind Cruxmont.

Written and created by K.A.

Stats.

Produced and directed with Sound Design by Travis Vengroff.

Edited with Sound Design Mixing and Mastering by Dane Leonardson.

And with Script and Casting Consulting by Gemma Amour.

Starring Ajua Ando, Daniel Demeren, Erica Sanderson, Heather McLellan, Sue Bomer, Sinclair Bell, and David Alt.

With executive producers Dennis Greenhill, Michael Viegas, Carol Vengroff, and AJ Punkkin.

Additional dialogue editing by Sarbachinsky of Polarity AudioWorks, and music by Stephen Malin.

This episode would not be possible without the support of our listeners on Patreon, so please consider supporting us there at patreon.com/slash foolandscholar, or by sharing this show with a friend.

This episode is copyrighted 2022 by Fool and Scholar Productions.

Thank you for listening.