A Theater Kid's Path To Broadway Producer

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This is Fresh Air.

I'm Terry Gross.

My guest was a key behind-the-scenes figure in Rent and Hamilton, two Broadway mega hits that opened the door to new kinds of musicals.

Each won a Pulitzer Prize for Drama and multiple Tony Awards, including Best Musical.

My guest Jeffrey Seller produced Rent with his business partner, Seller's own company produced Hamilton.

He was also a producer of Lynn-Manuel Miranda's first musical In the Heights, as well as the satirical adult puppet musical Avenue Q and the recent revival of Sondheim's Sweeney Todd, starring Josh Grobin as Sweeney.

You may assume that since his skills include raising money to produce shows, that he's from money, but he's most definitely not.

His family was often broke, or close to it.

He grew up in a neighborhood outside Detroit that was nicknamed Cardboard Village because the houses were so cheap and shoddy.

His father worked serving papers, twenty bucks for each summons served.

His mother worked for low wages as a clerk at a neighborhood pharmacy.

The family couldn't afford health insurance, and Seller had serious respiratory problems.

Seller has written a new memoir called Theater Kid that's a fascinating look into his own life and into different parts of the theater world.

His life in the theater started when he was a child and landed a role in a synagogue Purim play.

After many stops along the way, he became a booker with the job of booking touring companies of popular musicals into theaters around the country.

That work led him where he always wanted to be, producing musicals.

He also writes about coming out during the AIDS epidemic and how terrifying that was and how it wiped out so many people who created and performed in Broadway shows, as well as a significant part of the audience.

We recorded our interview June 17th.

A few days later, on June 23rd, an announcement was made that on that night, a group of Democratic senators, along with Jeffrey Seller, would host an invitation-only pride celebration at one of the Kennedy Center's smaller theaters.

This was not not programmed by the Kennedy Center.

Seller was also part of a protest in early March when Hamilton canceled its scheduled run at the Kennedy Center in protest against President Trump removing and replacing 18 Kennedy Center board members who were appointed by President Biden.

Trump fired the chair of the board and took over that position himself.

In a statement explaining Hamilton's cancellation, Seller said, quote, the recent purge flies in the face of everything this National Cultural Center represents, unquote.

Here's our interview.

Jeffrey Seller, welcome to Fresh Air.

Well, since this is the 10th anniversary of Hamilton, congratulations of Hamilton opening on Broadway, let's start there.

Thank you.

You had already produced Rent and Lynn-Manuel Miranda's first musical in the Heights.

When you heard In the Heights mix of rap and Broadway music, you felt a little out of your element because you hadn't followed rap.

Had you listened to a lot more rap by the time of Hamilton?

No, I had, of course, become completely enamored with In the Heights.

And, you know, that first time Lynn sang lights up on Washington Heights at the break of day.

It was so warm.

It was like this Caribbean water that's just enveloping me.

And then when after that, the Broadway chorus came in with,

In the Heights I Wake Up and Start My Day.

My God, I already had the goosebumps.

And in many ways, Hamilton was just Lynn's next musical.

Okay, so since you mentioned In the Heights and that opening song, let's hear it.

That was Abuela.

She's not really my Abuela, but she practically raised me this corner as her Esquela.

Now, you probably thinking, I'm up creek.

I've never been north of 96th Street.

Well, you must take the A-train.

Even farther than all to northern Manhattan and maintain.

Get off at 181st and take the escalator.

I hope you're writing this down.

I'm gonna test you later.

I'm getting tested.

Times are tough on this vote.

Two months ago, somebody bought Ortegas.

Our neighbors started packing up and picking up.

And ever since the rents went up, it's gotten mad expensive.

But we live with just enough.

In the heights of life, in the heights, it's fight by day.

We're the heights and

debts and bills to pay.

In the heights, I can't survive without the pay.

But tonight seems like a million years away.

Washington next doctor.

Okay, that's the opening of the Roadway Musical In the Heights, Lynn-Manuel Miranda's first musical produced by my guest, Jeffrey Seller.

So Hamilton was supposed to be a record.

That was the plan.

It was going to be called the Hamilton mixtape.

And you convinced or helped convince Lynn that it should be a musical, not just a recording.

How did you convince him?

Well, I'm going to give real credit to that to his colleague, friend, and director, Thomas Kahl.

And Tommy had an idea, which is that if he could get Lynn to do a public cabaret performance of just the songs, that would persuade him that this could be a musical.

So in early 2012, they did like eight songs from Hamilton at Jazz at Lincoln Center.

And it was so clear from that performance that this was a book musical that after that, I wrote a letter to both of them saying, if you want to get going on a musical, I want to be your producer and I'll clear the decks.

I'll be your cheerleader.

I'll be your nurturer.

I'll be your critic if you want to go.

I had a new company at that point.

I named it Adventureland and I said, let's go on this adventure together.

And that was early 2012.

So as the lead producer, what was your role?

What was your job?

Sometimes it was to make lunch.

Like at one point,

Lynn and Tommy and another writer we were considering working with came out to my house and they would work in the morning.

I would make egg salad with my own mayonnaise that I had learned how to make from the New York Times cookbook and serve.

But what I mean by that is setting the table for them to do the great work

and giving them that space

and giving them that praise when it was necessary, giving them that reinforcement and encouragement when it's necessary.

And then sometimes knowing, when can I make a suggestion?

Or not can I.

Sometimes knowing when is the right time to make a suggestion.

Tell us a suggestion you made that you think was really helpful.

You know,

in the case of Hamilton, I would say I made less suggestions than I ever had before.

But, you know, one very important one was cutting the third rap battle in Act Two.

You know, we had not two rap battles, but we had three rap battles.

You know, another situation was cutting the dear Theodosia

reprise

in act two.

I also seem to remember

talking deeply

about how the set would be realized, which came later with David Korens and Thomas Kahl.

I also remember talking a lot about the staging of Washington on Your Side, which may not have been in its best form the first time they did it.

Cutting, why was cutting the rap battle and the other song that you referred to, why was cutting them important?

And why did you think they needed to be cut?

How much

can we as audience members take in?

We are not equipped for three-hour musicals.

And our musical already had a first act that was an hour and 15 minutes.

And believe it or not, the second act was even longer, which actually breaks the rule that Oscar Hammerstein once said, which was that the first act is usually going to be twice as long as the second act.

Or let me put it another way, the second act is going to be half as long as the first act.

And in our show, the second act was actually longer.

And one of our jobs is to really try to feel

how the audience is going to stay with the show through every moment of the show.

And there's a moment where the audience, they can't take anymore.

Where are we redundant?

Where are we in a situation where we can actually lose something?

And in those instances I gave, and there were others in Act II as well,

that we succeeded.

What's the logic behind the second act being shorter than the first?

Because we give our greatest amount of energy to the show for the first act.

That's where you're establishing character, plot,

the rising dramatic action, that big dramatic question, what is the major dramatic question?

And then in Act II, we just really want to see it resolved.

And if you look at Westside's Story, that's a show that has a 90-minute first act and a 45-minute second act.

Is there a particular song in Hamilton that when you first heard the music from it, made you think, this is great?

Well, Lynn shared with me the first songs probably around 2010,

2011.

And when I heard my shot for the first time, I was like, whoa.

Like if in the heights was this warm Caribbean embrace, my shot was lightning.

It was a wallop.

And I knew he was taking this form to a deeper place that was

even more, had even more impact.

And I knew he was on another creative tear.

Well, let's hear a little bit of my shot.

And of course, this is Lynn Lynn Manuel Miranda.

I am not thrown away my shot.

I am not

I drop knowledge.

I'm a diamond in the muff.

A shiny piece of coal.

Trying to reach my goal.

My power of speech, unimpeachable.

Only 19, but my mind is sober.

These New York City streets get cold.

I shoulder every burden, every disadvantage.

I've learned to manage.

I don't have a gun to brandish.

I walk these streets famish.

The plan is to fan this fuck into a flame.

But damn, it's getting dark, so let me spell out the name.

I am the A-L-E-X-A-N-D-E-R.

We are meant to be.

A colony that runs independently.

Meanwhile, Britain keeping on us endlessly.

Essentially, he tax us relentlessly.

Then King George turns around, runs a spending spree.

He ain't never gonna set his descendants free.

So there will be a revolution in this century.

And to me, he says in parentheses.

Don't be shocked when your history book mentions me.

I will lay down my life if it sets us free.

Eventually, you'll see my ascendancy.

And I am not thrown away, not shot.

I am not thrown away, not shot.

That's Lynn Manuel Miranda from the original Broadway cast recording

of Hamilton.

And my guest was the lead producer of Hamilton, Jeffrey Seller.

He has a new memoir called Theater Kid.

Was it hard to convince backers to invest in Hamilton?

Oh, gosh, no.

Hamilton had

this incredible power to galvanize audiences

almost within minutes of any

performance starting.

So when we started to share readings of Hamilton with people in in the industry, they were going crazy for it.

So I raised the money for Hamilton faster and easier than I had raised money for anything else before.

Let's talk about Jonathan Larson and Rent.

You went to a workshop of Larson's show that was in the works at the time.

Tick tick boom, which at the time was called Boho Days.

It was in the workshop process.

It was an autobiographical one-person show, and that person was Larson.

Describe what you initially saw and why you really identified with it.

Oh my gosh.

You know, up on that stage was just this piano, bass, drums, guitar, and out came this guy named Jonathan, who I'd never known in my life before.

You know, he was tall and lanky and had curly brown hair.

And he just attacked this piano ferociously.

And he was singing these songs about turning 30 and how he had this

image or this sound that kept going off in his head, tick, tick, boom.

He thought he was going to explode because he was a writer of rock musicals that nobody wanted to produce.

Because he lived in the fourth floor walk-up of an apartment down on Greenwich with a bathtub in the kitchen where all the roommates had to switch off on who could use it at what time.

He was an amazing performer, and he was singing these songs through the most amazing rock music that was giving me goosebumps all over my arms.

And,

you know, here was the question.

Should he keep writing rock musicals that nobody wants to produce?

Or should he take a job as an advertising copywriter where he'll finally have some money and get health insurance and a better apartment and maybe be able to go on a vacation?

And what do I do?

Do I sell out or do I keep pursuing my passion?

And I thought, how is this guy telling my life story when I've never even met him before?

Because I felt exactly the same way as a 25-year-old booker who really wanted to be a producer.

And his goal also was to write a show that spoke to his life and the people he knew and his generation.

Did you identify with that goal?

Oh, my God.

You know, Jonathan said about the shows that were happening in the late 80s into the early 90s, those aren't our characters.

That's not our music.

Those aren't our stories.

And,

you know, the first shows that meant something to me were like a chorus line where I looked up on that stage.

I'm a 14-year-old kid and they're telling stories of their lives.

It was a genuinely contemporary musical with a sort of contemporary score.

And that I knew right then and there, that's what I love.

So when he said that the shows on Broadway aren't telling our stories, what was on Broadway at the time?

Trevor Burrus You had the four mega musicals from England.

You had Cats, Le Miz, Phantom, and Saigon.

And basically, that's it.

Like, we were not making musicals during the 80s and the 90s on Broadway.

I'll give you an example, Terry.

In 1995, the year before rent,

there were only two musicals nominated for best musical.

One was Sunset Boulevard, Andrew Lloyd-Weber's musical, and one was a show called Smokey Joe's Cafe that was a review of songs by Lieber and Stoller.

So Sunset Boulevard actually won best score and best book by default.

Two musicals.

And that's where the industry was in the late 80s into the 90s.

Why do you think that was true?

I think one big reason was AIDS.

Look at the number of artists we lost, Howard Ashman, Michael Bennett, and look at the artists we lost that we don't even know.

And I think it was also about economics.

And for some reason, Broadway was having a hard time attracting investment dollars in the 80s into the 90s.

Trevor Burrus, Jr.: So you offered to produce Boho Days, decided to rename it tick-tick-boom, and you convinced Larson to do that.

And in serendipity, you were getting fired from your booking job, and the person you were working for said, your heart really isn't into this.

You should just like leave and go produce.

We're firing you.

And as she was firing you, Larson is returning a call.

Yes, it's a good thing.

And you couldn't take the call.

So that seemed like real serendipity.

Oh, my gosh.

And then, you know, you offered to produce that first, well, really, second show that he had written.

And then you decided it wasn't really working.

You had several problems with it.

What were some of those problems?

I couldn't raise the money.

You know, in many ways, when we were working on that show, he had told me that he had shared it with Sondime once.

And I said, well, what did Sondime say?

He said, that show is just you whining about Superbia.

And in some ways.

Superbia was the show he'd written before, the music.

That's correct.

And, you know, those

listeners who remember the movie Tick Tick Boom that Lynn Manuel directed with Andrew Garfield knows that they had done this big workshop of Superbia and nothing happened from it.

And when Jonathan calls his agent after Suburbia doesn't get picked up by any theater, she says, pick up your pencil and go back to work.

So he writes Tick Tick Boom and Orboho Days.

And in so many ways, it's his rant about not getting Superbia produced, at least according to Sondheim.

And for me, it was a show about how do I stay true to my dreams without selling out?

And guess what?

Every theme,

every motif that's in Tick Tick Boom ultimately finds its way to the better show, and that's rant.

So how did you convince him to like stop writing tick-tick boom and instead

start right writing what was his next idea which is a musical a contemporary musical based on Puccini's opera La Bohem.

Yeah early on in our professional friendship he shared with me this idea that someone had given him to make a version of La Boem that would take place in the East Village in which Mimi would have AIDS instead of tuberculosis.

And I thought it was a genius idea from the moment he told me.

So he was kind of working on two things at once.

But the thing about tick-tick boom was that if you took away all the other instruments and he was just at the piano and he was in a rehearsal room and doing it for a bunch of people that could be investors, it seemed as he was getting older, it seemed to lose its luster.

Like I wonder if he had moved on himself emotionally, because at some point as we were trying to get tick tick boom done, it just sounded like a 30-year-old who's afraid he's never going to be successful.

And I'm not sure audiences really are going to be that sympathetic to a 30-year-old who's already in despair that he's not going to be successful.

Because most of us would say, Well, get on with it.

Let me reintroduce you here.

If you're just joining us, my guest is Broadway producer Jeffrey Seller.

His new memoir is called Theater Kid.

We'll be right back after a break.

I'm Terry Gross, and this is Fresh Air.

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How do you deliver criticism to someone like Jonathan Larson without destroying him?

Oh Lord.

Jonathan invited me to the first ever staged reading of Rent in the spring of 93.

Stage reading means actors are reading and singing in front of music stands with the scripts in front of them.

And there may be a band or a piano and a drum.

And I go down, it was at New York Theater Workshop.

It was a hot day in June.

And I actually had met this guy who wanted to be a producer and I knew came from a very wealthy family in Australia.

So I thought, maybe if I bring this guy and he loves it, I can get him to invest.

That guy leaves it in our mission.

And

the reading starts with the song Rent, and it's like a wallop.

It's great.

But then immediately the show kind of disintegrates into all these different songs about life in the East Village, and it really has no

spine.

It doesn't have a plot that's coming through yet.

The characters, Amimi and Roger, and Collins and Angel, are not coming through.

And that reading kind of drones on for almost three hours.

It's like 90 degrees in there.

And then this other guy who was there that I was with says, well, Jonathan's very talented, but he should just try something else.

She should just work on something else.

And then Jonathan calls me and says, okay, let's go to dinner.

I want to hear what you think.

So the first thing about criticism is don't offer it till you're asked, right?

You got to wait until they say, what did you think?

And sitting at Diane's Hamburger's on the Upper West Side, when he said, what do you think?

Then I really had to pause because I didn't want to hurt his feelings.

And I was afraid that he might reject me.

But you always start.

with praise.

And I talked about how great that opening song, Rent, was.

And I talked about how great the environment was.

And he said, yeah, but what else?

And that's when I said, I don't understand the story.

I don't get the characters.

Are you trying to write a play or are you trying to write a collage of life in the East Village?

And he looked at me and he was like, no, I'm trying to write a play.

And I said, well, then you have to bring forth.

the story because right now I'm not getting it.

So during the final final dress rehearsal of Rent,

Jonathan Larson went home early complaining of an upset stomach, a stomach ache, and by the next morning he was dead.

And the day that he died, that was the day of the first preview that was scheduled of Rent.

What we know now is he died of a tear in his aorta, probably caused by Marfan syndrome, which is a genetic disease that weakens the body's connective tissue.

First of all, he didn't have health insurance.

If he had health insurance, do you think it might have been diagnosed and he might still be alive?

He had visited two hospitals in the week before he ultimately died, and neither of them had diagnosed it properly.

Had he had health insurance and a doctor who was his personal advocate,

would the outcome have been different?

I don't know.

But

I know what it means to not have health insurance, and I know how scary that is.

Yeah, because you went through a lot of your life without it.

Yeah.

So describe for us how you heard the news about Jonathan Larson's death and what that day was like for you, including deciding what to do that night, which was to be the night of the first dress rehearsal.

I woke up that morning euphoric after the dress rehearsal,

and I had

given huge praise to Jonathan after the show, saying, you did it.

You made the show.

It's great.

He was happy to hear that praise, and he described that he wasn't feeling well to me.

But that morning after, so I woke up, I was like, you know, I was picking out what sweater do I want to wear tonight, what clothes.

And

after I went to my own therapy appointment, I took the R train to the office.

And when I got there, everybody's head was down.

And

my own general manager said, Jeffrey, I have something terrible to tell you.

Jonathan Larson died last night.

And I

was in shock.

And then I was

immediately struck by the fact that

holy m

he

he wrote his own life and he wrote his own death.

This is a man who wrote the the song for Roger one song glory

one song before I go

And I thought

Did he know

he was going to die?

I thought did he know he was going to die

I I was

Maybe maybe I wasn't shocked.

Maybe it all made its own dramatic sense.

But I was sad

and I was crushed.

And I also somehow knew in that moment he would become a legend.

Well, that's a very famous story now in Broadway history.

What about deciding to go through with the dress rehearsal?

Yeah.

In what form?

Yeah.

You know, I was on the phone with Jim Nicola, the artistic director at New York Theater Workshop.

And what he said is he was afraid that the kids in the show would not be safe to try to do all the complicated maneuvers, choreography, staging, backstage and onstage, given this trauma that we had all just experienced.

So

they were going to do a reading of the show for family and friends of Jonathan.

And in fact, that night, we all came into the theater.

sat down and they started doing the show, sitting at those famous silver metal tables that were the set of Rent.

And

it was so powerful hearing Adam Pascal sing One Song Glory.

It was so powerful hearing Wilson Heredia

sing I'll cover you with Jesse Martin.

And then by the end of the first act, when they were in the life cafe doing La Vie Boheme, there was just this moment that Daphne Ruben Vega, who was playing Mimi, just got up on that table and she started dancing.

And then Wilson Heredia as Angel got up, and then Adina got up.

And then the entire cast did all the choreography on that table to La Vie Boheme.

And the first act ended with a sense of euphoria.

I'm going to let you choose what would you rather hear right now?

Rent or one song, Glory?

Oh, glory.

Okay, here we go.

One song, glory.

One song before

I go.

Glory.

One song to leave behind.

Find

one song, one last refrain, glory from the pretty boy front man

who wasted opportunity.

One song, he had the world at his feet, glory

in the eyes of a young girl,

a young girl.

find

glory beyond the cheap colored lights.

One song before the sun sets.

Glory

on another

empty life.

Time flies,

time

dies

glory

That was Adam Pascal singing one song glory from the original cast recording of Rent.

So I think that

Rent won the Pulitzer Prize at more or less the same time that Larson died.

They're like very close to each other.

What was it like to go through

the honor and the, I'm sure, like normal feeling of jubilation having won a Pulitzer

and at the same time still be grieving for Jonathan Larson?

Oh,

it was the best of times and worst of times because

the show's success was

potent and thrilling and changing my life.

And yet I was also filled with the loss of Jonathan and I think a little bit of guilt that he didn't get to go with us because it was going to change his life.

He had only just quit the Moondance Diner as a waiter two months before we started rehearsal.

He still lived in that fourth floor walk-up, and he didn't get to enjoy all of that.

And I felt badly, and I felt a little bit

guilty.

Well, let's take another break here, and then we'll talk some more.

If you're just joining us, my guest is Jeffrey Seller, and he's written a new memoir called Theater Kid, a Broadway memoir.

We'll be right back.

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Since you're a producer and part of your job is raising the money needed to produce the show and rent the theater, like I said in the introduction, people might assume you came from money when the story is the opposite.

So describe your neighborhood that was known as Cardboard Village.

Okay.

My father,

who had inherited his family business, which was a tool business, bankrupted

by overspending and through his own manic behavior.

And then he was in a motorcycle accident on I-94 in between Detroit and Kalamazoo, which caused brain damage, aphasia, a kind of dementia, and disenabled him from working.

Our family wound up on welfare, and we lost our nice house in our nice neighborhood.

And we had to move to this neighborhood that the kids called Cardboard Village, because the houses were made of those

shingles, those tar shingles, instead of bricks.

And instead of having having basements, they were built on these 800 square foot slabs of concrete.

You know, one teeny bathroom, maybe a carport, but certainly no garage.

And

that was the neighborhood where I grew up ultimately.

And that no basement meant there was no place to shelter if there was a tornado.

Yeah, so they'd like, they would like tease you and say, you know, this is Michigan.

So they tease you and say, How you have nowhere to go.

Where do you go if there's a tornado?

And I would go, I don't know.

One of the craziest stories for me in the book, your Hebrew school teacher is teaching about the Warsaw Ghetto during the Hitler regime, where all the Jews were kind of forced to stay.

And

there was like no food.

I mean, it was horrible conditions.

And a kid asks her, like, was there anything contemporary like that?

And she says, yes, cardboard village.

Yeah.

I just think like, that's insane.

Like, I don't care how poor your community was.

It wasn't taking place during the Holocaust.

What was your reaction when you heard the comparison of the Warsaw ghetto to your home?

I wanted to disappear.

I wanted to,

I was afraid I was going to be found out.

I was burning red.

My heart was beating a million miles a minute, and I was

holding in tears.

And what I realized in retrospect is that it was inconceivable to this teacher that anyone in this class at Temple Israel could be that poor.

Aaron Ross Trevor Barrett, right.

And you weren't very comfortable with the temple because most of the members were from an adjoining neighborhood that actually had money, which you did not.

Yeah.

So then your father, because of his traumatic brain injury,

he became a summons server, you know, serving papers.

That's right, summons, subpoenas, all the different court orders to people in trouble.

Yeah, so he dealt with deadbeat dads, prospective divorces, delinquent mortgage holders.

And when you were available, he'd take you with him.

But it sounded like a terrifying experience because he was a reckless driver.

And his way of serving papers was often very confrontational.

Like there were incidents that really left you terrified.

Wouldn't you describe one of them?

Well, I have this

very strong memory of him like, come on, go serve papers with me.

And I didn't want to.

I didn't like it.

I didn't like going to these neighborhoods that were far from our house and leaving, you know, the house.

And,

but he wanted my company so badly.

So I would say yes.

And I remember once going to this one neighborhood where, you know, the house doesn't look that different from ours.

It actually might have been a little bigger.

And he can't, like, he's banging on the door and no one's coming.

And then finally this woman comes out and she is like, you know, like, what is it?

She's wearing like a t-shirt dress.

And she's like kind of shaking her head.

No, no, no, meaning like whoever he's looking for isn't here.

And then

from the other side of the house, this guy comes around and he starts trying to kind of run away.

And my six foot three, 250 pound father starts chasing after him.

And then he winds up seeing, you know, getting him on the sidewalk in front of the next door neighbor's house.

And they're like talking.

And I like roll down the window so I can hear it and then the neighbor who's actually living in the house next door opens the door and says leave him alone and then my father serves him the paper and then that guy

screams to my father get out of here you pig and he used the F word and then my father ran up and put his hand through his window

So, you know, during all of this, you fall in love with theater.

And was theater for you the kind of place you wanted it to be for others?

Like you leave life outside the theater door and you immerse yourself in the characters or in directing or producing the show, and that becomes your world while you're in the theater?

I guess it became the greatest new world I could have ever discovered.

This world where we make plays and invent dialogue and create characters and build sets.

And I took it very seriously, and I was incredibly rewarded by the audience' reactions.

Yeah, because you started off acting.

Sure.

And then

I love this story.

You were in a play called Popcorn Pete.

It was a school play, right?

It was the community theater.

It was the youth theater play, yeah.

Right, right.

It was the youth theater play from

a local theater company that was an adult company, but that had a kids' part.

Correct.

And it didn't do well.

You know, the theater was half-filled.

And you decided it's because, like, it's not a good play.

It's not a good title.

Why would anybody come?

And so you asked to be on the committee that chooses the plays that the kids perform and in a way like that's your first time you were a producer and you were how old?

13 years old.

Yeah, and you had to convince the adults that you were worthy of being on the committee.

So

was that a very empowering feeling, like helping to choose the plays?

Well, that was the first step I took toward becoming a producer because you know what the most important decision I ever make is as a producer?

What play to produce?

And is that a reflection of my aesthetic, my values,

my likes, the characters I care about?

So that was a huge moment for me.

And I want to also say at the time, I didn't even know it.

I just knew we could do better.

And I started reading plays every weekend.

I would read all these different plays.

And that's where I started to learn what makes a good play and a bad play.

Well, let me reintroduce you.

My guest is theater producer Jeffrey Seller, author of the new memoir Theater Kid.

We'll be right back.

This is Fresh Air.

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So you devote some time in your book to your personal story of being gay and it taking you a while to realize it.

And a great story is you had like made out with a girl or two and you know just kissing.

And then you're you're with some friends, I think, at a party, and you're playing some kind of game where you're supposed to reveal a truth about another person or ask them a different question.

It wasn't exactly truth or dare, but it was kind of like a cousin of that.

Yeah.

So one of the girls at the party tells you that you're gay.

And this is before you recognize that or at least admitted it to yourself.

Can you explain how that happened and what your reaction was?

Yeah, Lori Resnick.

You remember the name.

Wow, I remember that name.

Yeah, this was like a game after the eighth grade kind of graduation party at Joanne Cooper's house.

And Lori's like, I just want you to know, Jeffrey, you're gay.

And at this moment, I'm still 13 years old and I was very late to adolescence.

So in fact, at that moment, I had never had,

I hadn't really ever thought about sex.

And I had never thought about being gay and I'd never had a gay fantasy.

So when she told me that, I was

embarrassed,

ashamed,

and anxious.

And you know what was sweet?

After that party, like

I was sleeping over at my friend's house, and my best friend Bruce Rosen, who was definitely not gay and who was a jock

and was obsessed with girls, he said,

by the way, I don't care what Lori said.

And I thought that was so sweet.

You know what?

I'm thinking this might be a good time to play a song from Avenue Q.

Yes, please.

It's a song sung by two puppets who are roommates, and one of them's straight, and one of them's gay, but won't admit it, maybe not even to himself.

And so this is a duet about that.

And maybe, did you relate to this duet?

Not really, because by the time I came in contact with Avenue Q, I'd obviously been gay.

No, no, obviously, but didn't it bring back that memory?

Oh, that is so funny.

Well, no, when you just now, when I told you that story and you said, Let's play a song from Avenue Q, I laughed because, Terry, I had never put those two

events together in my life.

And I love that you just discovered that.

That is a new discovery that Bruce Rosen could have been singing to me.

If you were gay, that'd be okay.

I mean, because, hey, I'd like you anyway.

I love it.

Great.

Well, let's hear it.

If you were gay,

that'd be okay.

I mean, because hey,

I'd like you anyway.

Because you see,

if it were me,

I would feel free to say that I was gay, but I'm not gay.

Ninky, please, are you trying to read?

What?

If you were queer,

I'd still be here

after year, okay,

because you're dear to me.

And I know that you

would accept me too.

I would, if I told you to day.

Hey, guess what?

I'm gay.

But I'm not gay.

I'm happy.

So that's a song from the original cast recording of Avenue Q, a show that was produced by my guest, Jeffrey Seller, author of the new memoir, Theater Kid.

One last question.

Do you see Broadway as headed in a particular direction?

Do you see any interesting risks being taken now?

The one thing that I look back on with Jonathan and his goals to write stories about our characters, our stories, our music, is that

that value

Our music, our characters, our stories started with rent, and it continued on from Avenue Q and In the Heights to Hamilton, but it also continued on through so many other shows that I didn't produce, like The Pulitzer Prize winning Next to Normal or Dear Evan Hansen, and even in its own fun way, Maybe Happy Ending, which is now about two robots who fall in love.

So when I look at Broadway and I see all these contemporary musicals, I say, bless you, Jonathan, because every single one of these musicals is standing on his shoulders in some way, shape, or form.

And I think if we keep making musicals about who we are today,

and by the way, Hamilton does that too, even though it's telling a story that's 250 years old.

So if we keep making those musicals, I think we're going to be in great shape.

Jeffrey, it's been great to talk with you.

Thank you so much.

It's just been a pleasure.

Thank you so much.

It's been my great, great delight and pleasure.

Jeffrey Seller's new memoir is called Theater Kid.

Tomorrow on Fresh Air, we remember Bill Moyers and listen back to interviews we recorded over the years.

Moyers was a presidential aide to Lyndon Johnson, helped put together Johnson's Great Society program, then became Johnson's press secretary.

He later crossed over and became an award-winning journalist and PBS host.

He died last Thursday at age 91.

I hope you'll join us.

Our co-host is Tanya Mosley.

I'm Terry Gross.

How does a bastard, orphan, son of a whore and a Scotsman, dropped in the middle of a forgotten spot in the Caribbean by providence impoverished and squalor, grow up to be a hero and a scholar?

The $10,

founded father without a father, got a lot farther by working a lot harder, by being a lot smarter, by being a self-starter by 14th.

They placed him in charge of a trading charter.

And every day while slaves were being slaughtered and carted away across the waves, he struggled and kept his guard up.

Inside, he was longing for something to be a part of.

The brother was ready to beg, steal, borrow, or barter.

Then a hurricane came and devastation reigned on man.

Saw his future drip, dripping down the train.

Put a pentu to his temple, connected it to his brain.

And he wrote his first refrain, a testament to his claim.

Well, the word got around, they said this kid is insane, man.

Took a whole collection, just to send him to the mainland.

Get your education, don't forget from whence you came.

And the world's gonna know your name.

What's your name, man?

Alexander Hamilton.

My name is Alexander Hamilton.

And there's a million things I haven't done.

but just you wait just you wait

full of it dead ridden two years later see Alex and his mother bedridden half dead sitting

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