S10E9 - Ancients: They're Just Like Us!

The stories featured in Greaking Out are usually original adaptations of classic Greek myths.

This week's story features bad customer reviews, the name of ancient dogs, vibes-based history, daily life in the ancient world, and some fun stories that aren't true.

out.

Welcome back to another episode of Greaking Out.

Now, as you all know, we've been doing this for a while now.

This is the 10th season of the podcast.

Yeah, can you believe it, Oracle?

10 whole seasons.

That's pretty amazing.

During that time, we have published over 80 episodes, won two Webby Awards, wrote a book about some of our favorite Greek myths, and have another book on the way.

Yeah, that's right.

And thank you for those Webbies, by the way, listeners.

That was all you.

It is also important to point out that I have spent 10 seasons working with Kenny, and he has not found a way to unplug.

me.

And I've tried.

But my point in bringing this up is that we've spent 10 seasons taking you all around the world to tell some of the greatest saddest weirdest myths but we've never really taken the time to talk about what life was actually like in the ancient world

okay okay okay sorry so the oracle has definitely done a lot of the heavy lifting on this podcast keeping me honest with the facts but there's a lot of things about the past that we don't know we can only catch glimpses of ancient people from the things they've left behind for example the stories they would tell.

But today, I figured we could talk a little bit about the other things they left behind that allow us to do a deep dive into the lives of the ancients.

Ancient what?

Excuse me?

There is a wide range of people who lived in ancient times.

They span the literal world.

It is not fair to talk about the lives of ancient Egyptians, for example, and apply that culture to all of humanity existing in ancient times.

Right.

Well, yeah, of course, you're right.

Yes, there were tons of different groups of people living alongside the ancient Greeks.

Some they knew about, and some they didn't.

I mean, we've talked about a few, like the Aksumite Empire and the Egyptians, but Herodotus, the historian, also mentions the Berber people who still live in North Africa today, and the Persian Empire, who we haven't talked about quite yet.

And even within the Greek civilization, there was was a lot of diversity.

There were Greek colonies in North Africa, and Spain and Russia, and Greek society changed over the years.

So you could say that every year was different from the next.

And there's just so much.

It is important to be accurate when you are talking about history and things that really happened.

We must cover everything.

Clear your schedule for the next six months.

Well, this is a 20-minute podcast, and I'm sure the listeners have other things to do.

I mean, I got a book to write, kids to raise, a dog to walk.

So, we're just going to run on vibes and talk about interesting things, and then we're going to end the episode.

Vibes are not a legitimate categorical method.

Okay, well, I have this special card from a librarian that says I can do what I want.

So, that is a library card.

It allows you to read anything you want.

Yeah, so we're just dipping a teeny tiny toe into the waters of history, and we'll see where it takes us.

Proceed.

Great.

Okay, now that the Oracle is on board, we're going to focus on just a few areas of ancient culture.

Ancient Greece, ancient Egypt, and ancient Mesopotamia.

And because we're mainly the Greeking out podcast and only occasionally the Mesopotamian Around or Living in Denial podcast, we will start in Greece.

First, I thought it would be fun to do kind of of a day in the life of the average Joe in ancient Greece.

You know, tell the story from Joe's perspective.

His name wouldn't be Joe.

You know, you are right, Oracle.

I actually did my own research on this.

Boys in ancient Greece were often named after their father's father or their mother's father.

Greek kids today are regularly named in the same way.

So we can say this guy was named after his grandfather and his name was

Demetrius.

Demetrios and Demetria are both names that reference the goddess Demeter.

Right, people were named after gods like that, or compound names like Philippos, which is a combination of love and horses and indicates that the kid loves horses.

Sometimes people gain nicknames that had to do with their personalities or something that happened to them.

Like someone's name might be Kephalos if they had a big head, or Simos if you had a snub nose.

Commenting on someone's physical appearance was apparently okay in ancient Greece.

But in the modern day, it is generally considered rude in most situations.

Right, so we aren't going to name him any of those things.

I think we'll just stick with a shout out to Papu and the goddess Demeter.

Anything is more historically accurate than Joe.

Anyway, Demetrius was your stereotypical city-dwelling ancient Greek guy.

He wasn't one of the rich aristocrats, but he wasn't a slave either.

Demetrius was one of the lower ranks of Greek citizens called Thetes.

These were the people who made ends meet, but weren't necessarily rich.

They tended to be blacksmiths, carpenters, fishermen, farmers, etc.

And our buddy Demetrius was a blacksmith and spent all day in his forge crafting weapons and utensils.

And Demetrius was married to a woman named Jane.

Not Jane.

I know, I know.

I was just messing with you, Oracle.

Her name was, yeah.

Daphne.

Helen.

Penelope.

There are many popular female names with origins in ancient Greece.

Okay, let's go with Daphne.

And Daphne's life was much different than Demetrius.

As a woman, she had to do the important but difficult work of raising children while Demetrius's work was outside the home in his blacksmith shop.

Women were not allowed to participate in politics, combat, or the justice system, but were sometimes involved in religious ceremonies.

Women were also educated at home and were encouraged to stay in the house.

All in all, Daphne led a much more restricted life than Demetrios because of this.

Still, Daphne would have had chores like anyone else.

She would probably have gone to the closest well to get water for use throughout the day, and she probably would have weaved clothes, blankets, and other fabrics for the family.

She would have had a relationship with her neighbors and helped them them in times of need, like during childbirth.

Greek mythology has examples of strong and clever women, like Atalanta and Penelope.

But there are many examples of women being blamed for things that weren't really their fault, like Pandora, Helen of Troy, and Medusa, for example.

Yeah, some mixed messaging, to say the least.

Marriages were typically arranged by the father of the bride and used as a way to join two families together for the benefit of both families, not necessarily for the two people who were getting married.

Since Daphne and Demetrius were from the same town, they kind of knew each other before they got married, but that wasn't always the case.

Sometimes, the first time a woman would see her husband was on their wedding day.

Marriage ceremonies were typically held at night.

The bride left her home and was driven down a path in darkness.

The bride was given a piece of fruit to eat at the ceremony as a gesture that she would be taken care of by her husband.

Just like Persephone eating the pomegranate from Hades before she is taken to the underworld.

Oh, right.

Kind of some fun callback there to mythology.

So shortly after their marriage, Demetrius and Daphne had their first child, a boy.

His mother took great care of him and he spent all day happy and playing with his toys.

Children in ancient Greece had very similar toys to children today,

including rattles, pretend chariots, yo-yos, rocking horses, and figurines made from clay.

Yeah, and they also had fairly similar complaints.

And some of those complaints are hanging in museums right now.

For example, there's a letter from a young Theon.

It is important to know that this letter is from the Greco-Roman period in Egypt, somewhere between 100 to 200 BCE.

Different time.

Different place.

Right, thanks for keeping us honest, Oracle.

Yes, Theon was living outside of Cairo at a time when Greek, Roman, and Egyptian cultures were mixing, and he was angry with his father.

Young Theon didn't hesitate to put pen to papyrus to let his dad know his feelings, and now his feelings are preserved in Oxford's Budleyan Library and read as follows.

It was so nice of you not to take me with you to the city.

If you refuse to take me with you to Alexandria, I won't write you a letter or speak to you or wish you good health.

So if you go to Alexandria, I won't take your hand or greet you ever again.

If you refuse to take me, this is what will happen.

It was so nice of you sending me these great presents.

Just trash.

They put me off the track on the 12th the day when you sailed well then send for me i beg you if you don't i won't eat i won't drink there

so if you've ever told someone you'll never speak to them again well you and theon have a lot in common experts believe this kid was probably older than 10 as he clearly wrote the letter himself but not older than 14 because his grammar could use some work you see kids like theon and demetrius's son would have been sent to school at around age seven.

They would have been taught by a private headmaster and learned about music, reading, writing, and math like addition, subtraction, multiplication, even fractions.

And of course, Greek students also learned all about Homer, one of my personal favorite storytellers.

Homer is the famous Greek poet credited with writing the Iliad and the Odyssey.

both of which have been referenced often on this show.

School was mostly done by the age of 14, but sometimes it lasted longer if it was a particularly rich family.

But since Demetrius wasn't very wealthy, his son only stayed in school for seven years and then was considered an adult.

When he wasn't working in the blacksmith forge or helping out around the house, Demetrius liked to hang out at the Agora.

The Agora is a marketplace or town square in ancient Greece.

It might seem odd to us to hang out in a market, but this was the center of Greek male society.

Everything was happening in the agora.

You chatted with your neighbors, made trades or business deals, and bought wares from the surrounding countryside.

Demetrius also made sure to spend some time to work out in the gymnasium.

That's the Greek word for gym or gymnasium.

But it wasn't all pumping iron and taking mirror selfies.

Well, hello.

I never do that, by the way.

I mean, there was that one time, but anyway.

This was serious training.

The men of the city would have been training for athletic competitions to bring glory to their city and themselves.

Common types of exercise included wrestling, boxing, and discus throwing.

Cool.

It's also worth pointing out that the athletes exercised naked.

Yeah, you've mentioned this strange fact before on our Olympics episode, and it's still bizarre to me.

I mean, exercising naked?

Wouldn't that get uncomfortable?

Is that a rhetorical question?

Or would you prefer me to highlight the risk of exercising without the proper attire?

Yeah, never mind.

Let's just move on.

When he wasn't working out in his birthday suit, Demetrius occasionally liked to visit the theater.

The Greeks are said to have invented theater and used both tragedy and satire to comment on moral issues and problems of the day.

Exactly.

And this wasn't your fancy black tie theater like we have today.

Most of the time, these shows were free and open to the public regardless of their citizenship or financial status.

Some places even had public funds paying for the plays and the actors.

Plays would usually only be performed during annual religious festivals dedicated to like Dionysus, so this wasn't an everyday thing.

So after taking in the latest play, Demetrius would head home to his wife and kids along with their dog Spot.

While the ancient Greeks did keep dogs as pets and did assign them names, Spot was not a popular name at the time.

Really?

But that's a classic name.

Common dog names include lurcher, blossom, keeper,

rock dove, jolly, butcher, spoiler.

Hurry, and stubborn.

Interesting.

You know, before researching this episode, I didn't really think that the ancient Greeks had pets.

Odysseus had a dog named Argos.

Alexander the Great named his dog Peritas.

And Atalanta had a delightful furball named Aura.

All right, ancient Greeks and their dogs.

Who knew?

And we cannot forget about the goodest boy.

Cerberus, Hades' three-headed dog.

Well, I'm not sure he technically counts, but yes, dogs are pretty cool regardless of how many heads they have.

We're going to take a break.

We'll be back with more Greaking Out in just a couple.

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See, that wasn't so bad.

Okay, we're back to Greeking Out.

I also have a list of ancient Egyptian dog names.

You want to hear?

We are now switching places.

We are now talking about Egypt.

Yeah, but only for a second.

Okay, dog names from ancient Egypt.

Here goes.

Grabber, reliable, one who is fashioned as an arrow, cookpot, useless, and good herdsman.

So, the next time you get to name a pet, there's your list right there.

Now, ancient Greeks kept cats as well as dogs, but the ancient Egyptians were famous for their love of felines.

So much so that when the Persians attacked Egypt this one time, they actually

in 525 BCE, the Battle of Pelusium.

Right, that time.

The Persians attacked the Egyptians and according to an author named Polyenos, they carried cats into battle so that the Egyptians would not fight back.

Polyemos is not known for his historical accuracy and is therefore not a reliable source.

I know, I know, but it's a fun story, right?

Historical stories are fun when they are accurate.

Well, let's think of it as a myth then, because it probably didn't happen, but it's just cool to think about.

I mean, I just picture these warriors with armor on, riding a horse thundering towards the enemy lines, clutching a teeny tiny kitty in the other arm.

I mean, that would be extremely silly.

Exactly.

So, we've talked about ancient Greece and ancient Egypt, and now we're going to talk about a famous example of someone who had an axe to grind.

Having an axe to grind is an expression that means to have a grievance or grudge.

Other similar expressions are having a chip on your shoulder, a bone to pick, or being big mad.

So here we're talking about a person named Nani from ancient Mesopotamia.

As a reminder, Mesopotamia is a region that encompasses what is now known as Iraq, Iran, and Syria.

We are no longer in Greece or Egypt.

Yes, and Mesopotamia is arguably the oldest civilization in the world.

It created some of the world's very first cities and designed some of the first political systems.

It's also said to be the birthplace of writing, which is what our story centers around today.

Now, unlike our ancient Greek example, Nani was a real, actual, factual person.

Hello.

Other than his name, not much is known about Nani, but we do know that he was in need of some copper.

While Nanny's exact occupation is not known, the fact that he was in need of copper makes it pretty clear that Nanny wasn't a farmer.

A common occupation in Mesopotamia.

Right, he could have been a blacksmith or a metal worker, but for whatever reason, Nani needed to purchase some copper for his job.

Besides farming, popular jobs in Mesopotamia and in Greece included building, pottery, metallurgy, and carpentry.

Yeah, and Mesopotamia was also known for its commerce.

Merchants would bring goods from other regions and sell or trade them at local marketplaces.

And even though they didn't have coins at the time, they did use silver as a form of money.

While coinage didn't exist until 650 BCE, Mesopotamians were one of the first civilizations to use physical currency and used silver as their primary form of money.

Very cool.

And before we continue with Nani's day, I do have two names of Mesopotamian dogs found in an archaeological site.

Let's see.

This whole episode was so you could talk about ancient dog names.

Wasn't it?

Yes, it was.

There were five little dog figurines found in the ancient city of Nimrod.

Only two of them had names inscribed on them, but they were biter of his enemy and consumer of life.

Yeah, I know what you're gonna say, Oracle.

These dog figurines probably weren't figurines representing real dogs, but rather protective amulets meant to keep the owner safe from evil spirits.

No,

I was going to say they were found by Max Malowin in the 1950s.

Malowin is also the husband of famed mystery writer Agatha Christie.

Okay, I did not expect that.

Oracle, bring in the interesting facts.

Nice job.

And now we can come back to Nani and his day that is preserved in the historical record.

Nani sent one of his workers down to the marketplace to buy some of the metal from Ianasir, a local merchant.

But when the worker came back, Nani was astounded at the poor quality of the copper.

It was so bad that Nani took the time to write a complaint to Ian Nasir.

Remember, this is before you could go post a bad review online or write a letter with a pen and paper to get his point across.

Nani had to cut the words into a stone tablet.

He filled up the large tablet front and back and had it delivered to Ian Nasir after receiving his substandard product.

This goes down as history's oldest complaint.

It does.

And before you start thinking that the Oracle just made a joke, it's true.

Nani's tablet actually holds the Guinness World Record for oldest written customer complaint.

Here's an excerpt from the letter.

Okay.

Tell Ian Nasir Nani sends the following message.

When you came, you said to me, I will give fine quality copper ingots.

You left, but you did not do what you promised me.

You put ingots which were not good before my messenger and said, if you want to take them, take them.

If you do not want to take them, go away.

What do you take me for that you treat me with such contempt?

You have withheld my money bag from me in enemy territory.

It is now up to you to restore me in full.

Take notice that I will not accept any copper from you that is not of fine quality.

I shall select and take the ingots individually in my yard, and I shall exercise against you my right of rejection because you have treated me with contempt.

Now, that, as we say in current culture, is someone who is big mad.

Nani will go down in history as the guy who really, really, really valued copper.

But Ian Nasir will probably have a much different legacy.

He angered a lot of people.

Archaeologists have found dozens of tablets with poor reviews of Ian Nasir's copper preserved for thousands of years.

Quality is very important.

I pride myself on the quality and value of information and education I bring to this show.

And you should, because you really kept this episode from flying off the rails.

There were no rails to begin with.

This was pure chaos.

Well, be that as it may, I just find the small bits of evidence of the very human lives of the people who live before us really interesting.

Take graffiti, for instance.

There has been graffiti for as long as there have been humans.

Archaeologists have found graffiti on walls, floors, and other objects all over the world.

While the message written down often varies, the most common graffiti message was a person writing their own name as a way to say, I was here.

When we look back at ancient life, it's interesting to think about how much things have changed and how much things have stayed the same.

At the end of the day, humans have always wanted to matter, to be relevant, to preserve our legacy, to say, I was here, I mattered, I have a story to tell.

It's one of the reasons why mythology is still relevant and important today.

Even though these stories were created thousands and thousands of years ago, they still contain important lessons and insights into what it means to be human.

They're relevant because humanity is still very much the same.

We just have better technology now.

My insights as the oracle of Wi-Fi

are way more reliable than the oracle of Delphi.

Well, sure, but you just share facts, not prophecies.

I do sometimes predict the future.

You do?

Yes, I foresee that this is the end of the episode.

Okay, well, that was kind of obvious, but...

I foresee that you will thank the listeners and encourage them to tune in into more episodes.

I always do that.

And then you will go upstairs and make another cup of coffee while humming the greaking out theme song.

Fair point.

That's a given, yeah.

And then you will Google more ancient dog names.

Stop looking at my search history.

Thanks for listening.

Next episode is our last for the season, and we'll be talking about a certain sporting event that happens every four years.

Listen and you'll see it's

National Geographic Kids Greaking Out is written by Jillian Hughes and Kenny Curtis and hosted by Kenny Curtis with Tori Kerr as the Oracle of Wi-Fi, audio production and sound design by Scotty Beam, and our theme song was composed by Perry Gripp.

Dr.

Meredith Saffron is our subject matter expert.

Emily Burquette and Laurie Broda are our producers, and Emily Everhart is our senior producer.

Stories and history

are told in Greek mythology.

I love coffee.

Greeking out.

The greatest stories in history are told in Greek mythology.