Storytime with MrBallen | Tom Segura

Speaker 1 Alright, today is a very special episode. I'm actually trying out a brand new format, but don't worry, it is not in replace of core Mr.
Ballin content. This is in addition to.

Speaker 1 So we're calling it Storytime with Mr. Ballin, and I'm going to be interviewing a guest.
I've never done that before on any of my shows.

Speaker 1 This is the first of its kind, and it's going to be really good. We're going to look at the art of storytelling, how my guest employs storytelling.

Speaker 1 We're going to tell some stories because of course, it wouldn't be a Mr. Ballin production if there wasn't actual storytelling.

Speaker 1 And in fact, I'm going to be telling a story that I've never shared anywhere. It's a really good story, so that's going to happen today, too.
And our guest is incredible. He's got movies coming out.

Speaker 1 He's doing stand-up specials left and right. He also happens to be a fan of the strange, dark, and mysterious.

Speaker 1 And I'm really excited to talk to him about the art of storytelling, swapping some stories, and just seeing what he's all about. So, without further ado, let's get into today's stories.

Speaker 2 This is Storytime with Mr. Balin.

Speaker 1 I'm Tom Segura.

Speaker 1 Tom, welcome to Storytime with Mr. Balin.
Thank you. Thank you for being on the show.

Speaker 1 And for those who somehow don't know who Tom Segura is, you are arguably one of the hottest comedians, both physically and career-wise in the game.

Speaker 1 You are acting, producing, directing. You are seriously everywhere right now.

Speaker 1 And one of the things that I noticed about your sort of performance across mediums is that you really are like a remarkably good storyteller.

Speaker 2 Oh, thanks, man.

Speaker 1 You really have like nailed the art of storytelling, even though oftentimes when you tell stories, it's sort of, it seems sort of effortless. Yeah.

Speaker 1 But I mean, is that, were you ever sort of intentional about like threading being a storyteller into your work?

Speaker 2 I love storytelling. I've always loved storytelling.
I've always been like very hyper observant of good storytellers.

Speaker 2 My mom is like an amazing natural storyteller. Like she has all

Speaker 2 the gifts that you need for great storytelling. And my dad was as bad.
as you can get at telling a story. Like the single worst storyteller,

Speaker 2 a toddler, tells better stories. And so like you kind of, I think it actually helped to be like, oh shit, that's really good.
And like, God, that was so bad.

Speaker 2 He would be like, I was in the store, and then the guy punched the guy. So cops are there.
And you're like, wait, where? What happened? And like, her version of that story would be like, there was.

Speaker 2 100 people in line, which you know is an exaggeration, but like that's part of storytelling, right? Where to punch something up.

Speaker 2 And she's like, and it was hot, and this man walked in and he looked dirty, his hair was hanging. So she's like painting a picture, and you're like, yeah.

Speaker 2 And then the other guy, he said, move. And you're talking to my dad, you're like, what about, oh, yeah, that guy.
You're like, that's the main guy of the story. You missed it.
You don't have anything.

Speaker 2 Oh, yeah, yeah. Then he came.
All right. He's dirty.

Speaker 2 It's like just none of it, like none of the information, leaving out all the key information.

Speaker 2 Whereas she was like a naturally dramatic storyteller, heightening parts of the story, drawing you in, telling, like adding color, right? And then like knowing when to pull the pin on the whole thing,

Speaker 2 just like natural. What you realize is like when you're

Speaker 2 beginning as a comic, telling stories is actually, it's kind of advanced to get people to come along on a story.

Speaker 2 You don't see like year one, year two comics like, oh, he's a great storyteller. It's short form.
It's like, because you're also, you're just not, you can't manufacture being a comfortable comic.

Speaker 2 It happens because you've done it thousands of times. And you have to have a level of comfortability to be like, I'm going to tell you stories.

Speaker 1 So do you have like...

Speaker 1 Either a favorite or a go-to story that you would use on stage? It's a joke, but like a story that you love to tell.

Speaker 2 Probably the lost wallet story, because that's a true story. It's about a guy named Justin, right? A guy who lost his wallet in a cab.

Speaker 2 And the story is that I'm sharing the cab with a woman, and she finds the wallet in between us, asks if it's mine.

Speaker 2 I say it's not, and she's going to give it to the driver, and I go, no, give it to me. I'll give it back to its rightful owner.
And all this happened. I mean, this was in Adams-Morgan in D.C.

Speaker 2 And then I took it upon myself that I'm going to return this wallet to its owner, like this righteous, kind of feel-good, do-the-right thing path that I'm going to, and I announced it, so now I feel even more obligated.

Speaker 2 And I went through a number of, like I put a lot of time into getting this wallet back to this guy.

Speaker 2 I do call a bunch of places. I use all the information I can find in it.
The only person I get a hold of is this guy's father, Justin's dad.

Speaker 2 And when I tell him I have the wallet, he's just like, he's not going to amount to anything. And I'm like, what?

Speaker 2 He's like, he's a piece of shit. And I go, okay, can I give you the wallet? And he hung up the phone.

Speaker 2 And so that was like this kind of crazy, you know, closure to this of like the guys being like, my son sucks.

Speaker 2 And then a long while later, I'm at, I mean, I still remember it quite vividly.

Speaker 2 I'm at a lunch place on M Street in Georgetown, and I'm with my cousin. And we sat down and we're just looking over the menu, catching up.
And the waiter walks up and I go, Justin?

Speaker 2 He's like, How do you know my name? And I go, Dude, I have your wallet.

Speaker 2 And he's like, Do you have it on you? I go, I don't walk around with your fucking wallet. No, I have my wallet, but I actually have your wallet.
And he was like, Oh, cool.

Speaker 2 You want something to drink? And I'm like, That's all you're going to say about this, dude? Like,

Speaker 2 I found your wallet in a cab in Washington, D.C.

Speaker 2 Like, it makes me crazy when somebody's reaction to something is like, that and so I ended up telling him to come meet me yeah

Speaker 2 and he came to the door and I was like expecting like now we're gonna connect

Speaker 1 I gave him the wallet and he was like cool thanks and then he turned around and walked away and I was like you're dad's right like you're a piece of shit and I shut the door it's funny like so even just now like the way you tell a story is you understand that there are aspects of the story that I need to appreciate the context yes so that the story matters.

Speaker 1 And so like that, you just, you turned it into like.

Speaker 2 Context is like the biggest thing of joke telling too. Sometimes like you watch, I watch comedians that you go like, man, that's really funny.
Why isn't that working? Like, why doesn't it work?

Speaker 2 Because it's not that it's not funny. And then you go like, oh, you haven't, you need to convey more information at the top, at the setup, for that observation and joke to work.

Speaker 2 Like they don't understand what the joke is about yet.

Speaker 2 The only reason you don't know what the joke is about is because you haven't set it up clearly. Like you need context for it to be funny.

Speaker 1 I got to ask you, dude, like, how are you able to do all of these things? I mean, right now you're doing stand-up specials on Netflix. Like you have a thousand of those.

Speaker 1 You have your amazing new show, Bad Thoughts. It's this incredible sketch comedy show on Netflix.

Speaker 1 And the way I would describe it is like, it starts one way, each of these sketches, and it's beautiful cinematography. And you have a sense of where it's going to go, right?

Speaker 1 And then it just takes the most ridiculous detour into just

Speaker 1 crazy territory. And it reminds me of, there's this story by Edgar Allan Poe called The Imp of the Perverse.

Speaker 1 And I'm not going to get into it, but the gist of the story is like he writes about this guy who he commits murder. It's a fictional story.
It's this guy he commits murder and he gets away with it.

Speaker 1 And he can't believe he's gotten away with murder. And so he becomes obsessed with this idea that, like, he got away with it to the point where he's like,

Speaker 1 I got to tell someone I got away with murder. And he begins talking about it.
And he eventually gets himself caught and he gets executed.

Speaker 1 And it's like this notion from that story that we all have these like thoughts that are self-destructive. Yeah.

Speaker 1 That like you're standing on the edge of a building and your fear is not that you'll fall, it's that you might jump. Yeah.

Speaker 1 And I feel like your show, Bad Thoughts, it sort of encapsulates like the worst intrusive bad thought that somebody in that scene could act on. And they do.

Speaker 2 And it just takes it to this extreme level.

Speaker 1 Like, how are you coming up with these stories?

Speaker 2 Yeah, well, thank you very much for that.

Speaker 2 I do appreciate it. I've always felt this thing.

Speaker 2 And I think it's part of the release that you feel in comedy, right? When you go to a, a lot of times you go to a show and the big thing is people go, well, what is it about?

Speaker 2 It's like, well, he says the thing that we all want to say. Right.
Right. Like the, or the comedian does in some way.
And that's like such a release for an audience that, like, they're saying it.

Speaker 2 They're saying

Speaker 2 the thoughts. It's so relatable.
And

Speaker 2 I've always felt like that thing that I know, I feel, that human beings,

Speaker 2 we all have dark thoughts. Bad thoughts.
Bad thoughts. Right.
And

Speaker 2 part of it is like, well, on an individual basis, part of it's societal norms where you just, you have your thought, but you don't act on it, right?

Speaker 2 I mean, and and then you just try to like process it. And then, you know, social media, I think, is this great example of like, oh, these are things that nobody will say to your face, right?

Speaker 2 But it's like this permission to like, and let it, and it's probably

Speaker 2 a release for people to be able to be like, I fucking hate you. Like, cool.

Speaker 2 It's really cool. Because they'll never say it to you, right? And so in like, in coming up with these stories, it's like, you know,

Speaker 2 the the coffee shop one yeah uh was one of the was the first thing we shot uh a few years back i i actually filmed a few of the stories a few years that's how i got the show and so coffee shop one was one of the original ones we filmed before we had a series oh nice and so but that is like an example of it's like wish everyone has had a bad retail experience right where you're like i just want to kill this person.

Speaker 2 And then it was like, well, why don't we just make that? Like, why don't we have the person

Speaker 2 deserve, you know, backlash in some way and just take it over the top? So we just went to an extreme place.

Speaker 2 And it's the one that got the, by far, I think, the biggest reaction where people were like, writing things to me, like, yo, they deserved it. And like,

Speaker 2 like, cool, yeah, they did. They deserve to die

Speaker 1 for the bad coffee order.

Speaker 2 But yeah, that's a fun, you know, kind of way to exercise the thoughts is like, what if we think of the thing we've always wanted to say or do or the impulse in that moment and actually

Speaker 2 make it.

Speaker 1 So actually, I saw in one of your earliest stand-up specials, it was completely normal that some of these ideas that popped up in bad thoughts, like the Steven Seagal bit and the barista one, the two-headed girl, it's like those stories become fully realized in bad thoughts.

Speaker 1 But it seems like you at least had some concepts early on.

Speaker 2 Oh, some of them have been sitting with me for a while. Yeah, yeah.
Or even like

Speaker 2 the

Speaker 2 origin, the nugget of the thing that became something else. Like there's a

Speaker 2 the whole reason the storyline of the, you know, the

Speaker 2 virtual reality guy. It's so good.

Speaker 1 That's the second episode, right?

Speaker 2 Dude, yeah, because it's a three-part story, right? It's so good. So

Speaker 2 there's the office where he gets like disrespected, Then he creates the video game. Then you reveal that it's a game.
And then there's the part three where it's like he's become the successful guy.

Speaker 2 Well, in part two,

Speaker 2 where he's like, we need to sit on that toilet together.

Speaker 2 The origin, like the whole reason, like what makes me laugh is that the origin of that, the reason that that even exists is I've always loved upsetting my mother, right?

Speaker 2 And I know there's things that she doesn't want to ever talk about, and one of them is going to the bathroom, right? She just doesn't want to, so I try to say it as much as possible. That's good.
And

Speaker 2 a few years, like several years ago, I would do father-son trips with my dad, like where I was a working adult, but I was like, he was like, you know, let's plan something.

Speaker 2 We'd go spend like two, three days in Portland, Maine, or something, you know, and then I'd go back to LA.

Speaker 2 But we've been doing those trips for years. And like,

Speaker 2 even

Speaker 2 25, 30 years ago I was

Speaker 2 a teenager or whatever I would go on a trip like with my dad I get back and my mom was like how was the weekend and I would go well you know it was great and I go you know this one day I go you know dad was taking a shit and she'd go I don't want to hear this and I go no no no this is please this is actually she goes I don't want to hear this I go it's not what you think she's like okay what I would go so dad was taking a shit and she'd be like what okay and I go you know how when you sit on a toilet, there's like a gap between your legs?

Speaker 2 And she'd go, yeah. I go, so I had to go.
And so I sat in that gap and we went at the same time.

Speaker 1 And she'd be like, what the hell is wrong?

Speaker 2 And so I would do that to her like every couple of years. I would tell her the same thing.
She would never remember that I'd already told her.

Speaker 2 Oh, you used this. I would use that exact thing that we went to the bathroom at this.
And she was like, this is the most disgusting thing I've ever heard.

Speaker 2 And I basically wrote a story where I was like, how can I incorporate going to the bathroom? So the bathroom, and that's where we created the portal world.

Speaker 2 But it's all based on that.

Speaker 1 Do you have any concepts material that you do come back to that you think about that that could work, but you don't, you haven't employed it in a public way yet?

Speaker 2 There is this thing where sometimes you go,

Speaker 2 you know, you, I've tried things and abandoned them.

Speaker 2 And then you find that, like, five or 10 years later, you go, oh, there was that joke. You're like, I'm going to try.
10 years have gone by. So I'm naturally going to have

Speaker 2 some difference in my approach to saying it or telling it. And it's one of those things where sometimes you go,

Speaker 2 holy shit, that works now. Like it needed to marinate for a decade.
But it is, I think,

Speaker 2 you learn to listen, you listen to yourself, right? It's like, it's kind of like

Speaker 2 your guiding voice internally, right? Of like, it's equivalent to like, don't walk down that hallway, you know? Like, I think

Speaker 2 the thing you have to

Speaker 2 work on if you're doing this is

Speaker 2 learning how to listen to that. Listen to yourself.
Like, hey man, don't ignore those thoughts. Like, I used to think that laziness meant

Speaker 2 not

Speaker 2 getting up on stage, But what I learned is that laziness in

Speaker 2 comedy, like in stand-up, is about

Speaker 2 all the times you're not on stage. You can get on stage every night and still be a lazy comic.

Speaker 2 You know, you're lazy if you don't spend some time

Speaker 2 kind of exploring your own thoughts, jotting down that thing, thinking about like that thing, that's the work.

Speaker 2 The work is in those all that time before you get on stage. And so

Speaker 2 it kind of surprises you. Someone could be like, you're not lazy.

Speaker 2 You're doing spots all the time. You're like, no, you're still lazy because you're not doing anything off stage.
I mean, one thing that's very clear is you see comedians who are stuck.

Speaker 2 They're like, I feel stuck here. I'm not evolving.

Speaker 2 I would bet almost everything that

Speaker 2 a lot of the people saying that are the ones who are not

Speaker 2 trying things, not,

Speaker 2 it's like not doing, you always need like new, something new. New is what makes it exciting and moving.

Speaker 2 And so it's very easy to fall into that, like, you figure out 20 minutes that work or whatever. Yep.
And you go, I'm just going to do that because it works. Because you get fear of like, what if I

Speaker 2 leave that and I try to come up with new stuff and the new stuff doesn't hit like that.

Speaker 2 But then the worst thing happens, which is that that 20 minutes that works just starts to weigh on you because it's not exciting or new in any way. And then you slowly kind of die inside.

Speaker 2 That's why you kind of always want to turn things over.

Speaker 2 Like I feel like you, you shoot something or you record a special and then you just go, I'm done with it and I need, I need to come up with more. And then your brain just kind of, you know,

Speaker 2 you generate more because of the necessity.

Speaker 1 The idea of like working on material, like going up on stage to a live audience, yeah, and not even telling them you're doing this, but like trying a new minute or whatever.

Speaker 1 Yeah, is that something that you do?

Speaker 2 I mean, oh, yeah, that's I mean, that's the

Speaker 2 part you get addicted to, really. That's the whole drive of doing stand-up.
It's thinking of something and going, I'm going to try this on stage,

Speaker 2 and then the

Speaker 2 build of anxiety of will this work or won't this work,

Speaker 2 the

Speaker 2 absolute the euphoria that you feel when it does work is like unlike any other feeling and which is why you i think comedians will do it into their 90s if they live and then the absolute gutting depression you feel when it doesn't is like so it's so powerful that you realize the only way to overcome that feeling is to try something again and hopefully get the other reaction.

Speaker 2 Wow.

Speaker 1 So I can only speak to my limited, I'm not stand-up comedy, but I've done stand-up storytelling a few times.

Speaker 2 Yeah, if you've spoken in front of an audience,

Speaker 2 yeah.

Speaker 1 But so in my world, I already know the conclusion of all the stories. I know exactly where it's going to go.
I remember I had one show that I did and the audience was literally like so respectful.

Speaker 1 It was difficult for me to get into the story because it was so proper, so nice, so quiet.

Speaker 1 The other crowds were like really reacting to stuff and it made it so difficult to do the same stories I had rehearsed. I can't imagine having the blow of them being like, dude, what was that?

Speaker 1 And then getting up and doing it again.

Speaker 2 Oh, yeah. And

Speaker 2 the thing is, there are audiences, even sometimes in stand-up shows, like you don't expect it, but you get, it's not like every crowd's the same. Sometimes you get these very reserved crowds

Speaker 2 where you're like used to people with like a lot of energy and they're just like

Speaker 2 clapping at the ending the bit. And you're like, Jesus.
The thing you learn over time

Speaker 2 is when an audience isn't like super high energy or you go like this audience sucks essentially yeah you don't go hey you like when you're starting out you're like why do you guys suck because you don't realize that sometimes and this is this is true

Speaker 2 that audience that was just like they weren't high energy they had a great time like you don't you don't realize it until you've done this a while that like you'll finish that show and you go what the fuck was that and then you you run into people and they're like that I had the best time at that and you're like wow really because what happens is an audience for the most part

Speaker 2 they don't they're not referencing this show to thousands of other shows you are like you know that they're down here on the list of audiences They don't know that. That's true.

Speaker 2 They're just like, this might be the first show they've gone to in like three years. And they're like, this was a great time.
Wow.

Speaker 2 And they'll become aware if you tell them. So you're like, just so you know,

Speaker 2 you suck. And they're like,

Speaker 2 I thought we were having a good time. They just don't have that level of energy.
Now, the next night, you could be in a venue where it is just like fireworks.

Speaker 2 And those are the ones you almost want to tell them. Like, you guys are unbelievable.

Speaker 2 Like, they don't, I don't know if you know this, but you're insanely good. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I know that you are a consumer of the strange, dark, and mysterious. Yes.
So it wouldn't be a Mr. Ballen episode if I didn't tell you a story.
Yes.

Speaker 1 And so we actually looked for a story that would specifically resonate with you.

Speaker 2 And I'm so excited.

Speaker 1 And I also, we even, the way we got the story, this is the context part.

Speaker 1 This story isn't really on the internet. Like we heard references to it.
And we tried to find the source material for it, but we couldn't. Like we literally looked, we couldn't find it.

Speaker 1 It's a story out of Mexico.

Speaker 1 And so we finally had had our spanish language researcher track down this this library in mexico that had a copy of this story there was a very unique recording and transcript and it's being stored like locally at this library in mexico and so the way to access this story is you can't just like contact the library you have to write them a letter to get access to this story.

Speaker 2 To hear a story?

Speaker 1 To just read the transcript. To read a transcript.
In the story.

Speaker 1 The story without the transcript not really a good story you need the transcript you'll see so we we followed their steps we contact the library and we get access to the story and they're like very weary of what we're going to do with it but they're like okay

Speaker 1 be careful with this one right because it's like a sensitive story from mexico okay so that's the setup so uh this is by the way let's just stop Great setup.

Speaker 2 Great setup. I mean, I don't know where this is going to go.
It's good. But I'm fucking in, dude.
I mean, you just, you set up like a bond story. Pretty good.
I had to like request access through

Speaker 1 headquarters to hear a story okay so in in june of 1976 there's this 23 year old kid named rafael perez and he's he's training to be a pilot and he's flying he flies his his training missions if you will he's a civilian so he flies his training flights out of this airport in uh chimilacan mexico it's about three hours inland from acapoco and this kid he's flown many times but always with another pilot so he's learning how to fly a small plane plane like a Cessna.

Speaker 1 And on this day in June, he's going to fly on his own for the first time. The flight profile was very simple.
You're going to take off like you always have, fly in a loop, come back and land.

Speaker 1 Nothing more to it. You're basically demonstrating you can do it without panicking on your own.

Speaker 1 And keep in mind in 1976, the controls, the instruments inside of the aircrafts were pretty rudimentary. Like they didn't have GPS systems.

Speaker 1 It was sort of like you had like your compass and you had your altimeter. But honestly, a lot of flying was literally dead reckoning, like looking out the window and just seeing where you were, right?

Speaker 1 So he takes off at 9.15 a.m., it's June 23rd of 1976. He takes off.
And right away he notices that it's very foggy.

Speaker 1 And this was something he knew on the ground, but from a dead reckoning perspective, looking out the window, he's got limited access to reference points on the ground.

Speaker 1 So he really has not really a good sense of where he is. He's using his instruments and he's sort of guessing when he's supposed to make this turn to bank around, to come in and land.

Speaker 1 But on his approach back to the airport, he's successfully done this flight, he can't quite find the airport. Like he's struggling to see it.

Speaker 1 But at a certain point, based on his instruments, he realizes he's off course. He's lost.
And so he tries calling in with a radio back to the control tower to be like, I'm lost. I can let you know.

Speaker 1 It's going to take me a minute. He doesn't really hear back from them.
It's sort of garbled static. And then he realizes, oh, I need to fly back left.
I need to go left.

Speaker 1 So he takes the yoke, the steering wheel, and he tries tries to bank the airplane left, but the airplane doesn't go left. It just continues flying level at 7,000 feet in a straight line.

Speaker 1 And he's thinking, okay, there's clearly some sort of issue here. It's okay.
He's not panicking. He hops on the radio and he says, hey, I'm having some issues.
I can't go left. He tried going right.

Speaker 1 Nothing's affecting the plane. It's flying straight at 7,000 feet.
He hops on the radio. He starts talking.
Like, what do I do here? I can't do anything to my plane.

Speaker 1 And as he's trying to get a hold of anybody who's not getting back in touch with him, but we have his voice being recorded into this radio, the plane actually begins to climb.

Speaker 1 And he's not pulling back on the yoke. He's not making the plane climb.
The plane is climbing on its own. And so it begins to climb.

Speaker 1 And the way the fog and mist was, is there was like this big, like huge cloud that he was basically flying into. So he's ascending up to like eight, nine, ten thousand feet.

Speaker 1 He can't go left, can't go right. He's just going straight up into this cloud.
And so he can't see anything. He's like in a void.
He's totally panicked now.

Speaker 1 He can't get a hold of anybody on the radio. About the time he's totally obscured in the clouds, he feels this overwhelming tiredness come over him.
And he passes out, just passes out in the cockpit.

Speaker 1 He wakes up in the cockpit, has no idea how long he's been asleep for. It could have been a second, could have been days, but he's immediately shocked that holy cow, I did not crash the plane.

Speaker 1 Like, I know I just fell asleep in the plane. But a couple things immediately become clear to him.
First of all, his plane's still flying. He's still in the air.
He's still coasting along, right?

Speaker 1 But he's back down to 7,000 feet. He was was climbing before, now he's back down to 7,000 feet.
He also looks out the window and there's no more mist or fog or anything like that.

Speaker 1 It's actually just the open ocean underneath him. And immediately he thinks to himself, I took off from this airport that's three hours inland from the coast.

Speaker 1 If I went in a straight line and he looks at his clock and it says 1130, took off at 9.15, 10.15, 11.15. It's like two hours and 15 minutes from the time he took off.
I'm doing the math right.

Speaker 1 It's below three hours. What body of water am I over? The amount of time that has transpired that apparently I was asleep for is not enough time for me to arrive over any body of water.

Speaker 1 That flashes through his mind. In addition to that, he looks at his gas gauge and it's at three quarters tank.

Speaker 1 And he knew that not only is that way too high, but he wouldn't have had, even if he had three hours, he wouldn't have had enough gas to reach any water body.

Speaker 1 So wouldn't have had enough gas, but have three quarter tank of gas. Also, again, how did I get here? I have no idea how I got here.

Speaker 1 Has no idea where he is and as he's like coming to like what's happening here somebody chimes in over the radio and goes hey hey are you there and he grabs his radio and he's like he's totally frantic he's like hey i i fell asleep in my plane i don't know where i am and there's a pause and this is all recorded there's a pause and the guy on the other end he introduces himself sort of cautiously he's like hey this is carlos

Speaker 1 Are you alone in your airplane? And Raphael is like, of course I'm alone.

Speaker 2 Like, where am I?

Speaker 1 I think I fell asleep. I don't know what's going on.
And Carlos, his reaction is just sort of, okay,

Speaker 1 well, listen, here's what we're going to do. You're just off the coast of Acapoco.
And for the last hour, you've been flying out over the water. You just kind of showed up, right?

Speaker 1 And by the way, going back to the timeline. He arrived off the coast of Acapoco now an hour earlier.
That was 10.30 in the morning, took off at 9.15. Takes three hours to get there.

Speaker 1 He apparently did it in about an hour and 15 minutes. So he's circling over the water.
And Carlos is like, hey, just come into the airport where I am. I'm going to get you in there.

Speaker 1 You're going to land and we'll talk to you then. And so Raphael is just happy to be alive at this point.
He comes in, he lands at the airport in Acapulco.

Speaker 1 And as soon as he gets off, there's these people in suits that are there to meet him. And they immediately take him, they detain him, put him in like a black car.
He's asking what's going on.

Speaker 1 Nobody knows. They don't tell him.
And they drive him to a hospital. And he's the whole time saying, I'm so sorry about the craft.

Speaker 1 Please tell like the, where I flew out of that I'm sorry about the craft. I hope it's not damaged.
They bring him to the hospital. They drug test him right away.
He's not on drugs. He's sober.

Speaker 1 And they also have a psychologist come in and they give him a profile, make sure he's sane. And she determines that he is.
And so the whole time, Raphael has no idea what's happening.

Speaker 1 He doesn't know what they're doing. He doesn't understand any of this.
And so finally they say, okay, we're going to tell you what happened.

Speaker 1 So when you showed up off the coast to Bacopoco at about 10.30 in the morning, which no one understands how you got there. It's not possible.

Speaker 1 You showed up on the radar screen of who you were talking to, Carlos, the air traffic control guy. And he talked to you for an hour while you were out over the water.

Speaker 1 That whole time you were circling, you were talking to him and it was recorded. And I'm going to read to you the first thing that Raphael said to Carlos.

Speaker 1 And you're going to see in a minute why Carlos's first question when Raphael came to was, is there somebody else in the plane?

Speaker 1 He said in a very deep, almost robotic voice, when Carlos saw this blip on his radar at 10.30, he said, hey, who is this? You're flying over Acapulco's coast. What's going going on here?

Speaker 1 The voice came back and said, the pilot is speaking, but not of his own free will. We are using him as a microphone.
Your equipment is too primitive.

Speaker 1 It is not important who we are or where we come from, only that we are inhabitants of the same universe.

Speaker 1 For the next 30 to 45 minutes, the voice being projected through Raphael talked about humanity is the only intelligent species in the entire universe that uses warfare and conducts violence on each other.

Speaker 1 And you are poised for a nuclear holocaust, and you may be exterminated if this continues. And then at about 11.30,

Speaker 1 Raphael wakes up and his voice changed completely.

Speaker 2 And he's like, oh, what's going on?

Speaker 2 I think I fell asleep at the wheel.

Speaker 1 And that's why Carlos is like, wait a minute, I've been talking to you for an hour. And he's like, it's somebody else in the craft with you, right?

Speaker 1 No one has any idea how Raphael wound up over the coast.

Speaker 1 They examined his plane. Nothing wrong with his plane.
It really was three-quarter tanks of gas. Didn't make sense how it got there.
Nobody knows. Rafael has no idea how he got there.

Speaker 1 And the Mexican government quickly took this story, buried it, and now you can only access it in this obscure library in Mexico.

Speaker 2 That's a great story.

Speaker 1 That's a great story. So what's your take on what happened?

Speaker 2 First of all,

Speaker 2 great job telling the story. Thank you.

Speaker 2 I mean, there is only one summary you could get.

Speaker 2 You know, either this is like a, I guess it's two, it's either a bipolar schizophrenic who is having a pretty crazy episode, or there's another being involved, which is

Speaker 2 more exciting, more entertaining. Because we're in the era now of the government being like, yeah, we have

Speaker 2 stuff. UFOs are real.
Yeah. And we have aliens and they've been here and other places have them too.

Speaker 2 And most people just go, oh, cool. Like the thing that we used to make a movie about as being like, can you imagine if there were aliens and everybody would go like, that would be fucking wild.

Speaker 2 And then now we're like, yeah, we have them. And everyone's like, yeah.

Speaker 2 It's very strange, right? Like that

Speaker 1 there's like congressional testimony about aliens.

Speaker 2 Nobody's heart even skipped a beat. I thought we would all stop and be like, no way.

Speaker 1 Nobody cares. I know.

Speaker 1 Some of the footage that's been released that some of the videos of these apparent UFOs yeah I mean either it's an incredible CGI which is entirely possible but I think the idea that there's this like widespread conspiracy by the government to like what dupe us into believing that maybe they're that these aren't real or something doesn't make any sense to me no doesn't do you believe in aliens I mean are extraterrestrials life outside of humans so for me it was always like

Speaker 2 when you have and I don't even have the full comprehension of it but when you have some

Speaker 2 grasp of the idea of the size of our galaxies and the universe

Speaker 2 It becomes for me it just always felt like too arrogant to be like it's just us. Yes

Speaker 1 I stand with you firmly on that point.

Speaker 2 Yeah, and then like I think the natural thing is that you just become naturally more curious, you know my wife is a huge like dude. It's all day.

Speaker 2 She's like, you know what this guy just said about UAPs? I'm like, I don't know. And she gives me like like the she'll read back the transcript from like the senator.

Speaker 2 And I'm like, wow, that's pretty wild. That's pretty good.
But honestly, it's made me realize that it is a more exciting thing to like

Speaker 2 think about and talk about. And then,

Speaker 2 I mean, I think the natural thing is like, it feels like it's almost like being crumbed out for us. You're like, yeah, but

Speaker 2 where's the next thing, right? Like, when are we going to see or hear from something? You know what I mean? Like, you just want more.

Speaker 1 At that point, point, exactly, I think it was Neil deGros Tyson who gave this example. I don't know if it was him, the astrophysicist guy.

Speaker 1 He was like, humans think that if there were alien life, extraterrestrial life on Earth, that effectively we believe we could just simply identify it, that you would view it as like a three-dimensional being, let's say.

Speaker 1 But he was like, think of it this way.

Speaker 1 What are the odds? Or I should say, when you walk down the street and there is an ant on the ground, are you like, like, I want to get down there and talk to that ant. Right.

Speaker 2 No. No.

Speaker 1 You might step on the ant. You might not even notice the ant.
Go even lower than that to like algae. Are you like looking to communicate with algae? No.

Speaker 1 What's to say that we are not equivalent to an ant or algae to other beings?

Speaker 1 Suggesting if there were higher beings on this planet, It's very arrogant to say we would simply, one, they'd be interested in us. Yeah.
Are you interested in algae?

Speaker 1 Or two, that we could even even recognize them as anything close to what we are. Algae and humans couldn't be more different in terms of their makeup.

Speaker 1 And so it's like they could absolutely be here, but they're four-dimensional.

Speaker 2 Imagine the aliens watching, like they're just like trying to figure out people, and they just pull up this clip and they're just like, look at these two fucking ants, like talking about the dumbest shit.

Speaker 2 We don't want to waste our time with these morons. Dude.

Speaker 2 There's also the theory that it becomes, you know, it feels like fantasy, but I don't know.

Speaker 2 You can let your mind kind of embrace the idea that certain humans you're like that's a reptilian like you know what i mean like that's an like these evil like this like innately evil seeming people and

Speaker 1 um i don't know that they're already here you're like it's kind of fun to to play with that idea i like to believe man yeah i do it's fun so for you i mean i i uh you've been successful in so many different mediums you know you just got renewed for season two of bad thoughts which is amazing.

Speaker 1 You've sort of done

Speaker 2 like all of it.

Speaker 1 What's the next chapter? Like you described evolving. I mean, you've done a lot of that.
What's next?

Speaker 2 Honestly, it's,

Speaker 2 I mean, I keep doing as many of those things as you can. And then it's, I have a movie this summer.
I'm really excited to do.

Speaker 2 I've always loved movies. Like, I'm a huge fan of cinema.
Yeah. And so for me, it's like

Speaker 2 I feel like I won the lottery where I get to, I'm like, I get to do a movie. This is so awesome.
I'm so excited to do it.

Speaker 1 Can you tell us anything about the movie?

Speaker 2 Yeah, I mean, it's a cartel comedy.

Speaker 2 I get to play more than one character. I get to play two characters, which is like, it just feels insane that they're allowing me to do this.
And it's really, really funny script. It's so ridiculous.

Speaker 2 and it's a it's an r-rated comedy yeah um it's wild it's wild it's fun but it also has like a lot like to me like the thing that i loved about great comedies growing up especially like r-rated comedies yeah was like

Speaker 2 you almost take the comedies for granted the the the comedic parts of it it's like you have to have great story

Speaker 2 supporting the com like it's almost like you go like i know this is going to be funny but is the story a good story yeah and i think this is a really good story that has like great dynamics great characters and it's outrageously funny but you still care for right this main character and um i don't i mean i'm talking to you about six weeks before we shoot

Speaker 2 i hope

Speaker 2 if it

Speaker 2 i mean

Speaker 2 they'll definitely cut this up in plane if we make a piece of shit it's gonna be so good but i'm very excited to do it man i'm so excited so that's to me like the most exciting thing about what's next.

Speaker 2 I'm like, I'm so stoked to do this. I've always been, I moved to LA when I was 22 thinking that like I'm going to have a movie career.
And I'm 46.

Speaker 1 Crushing it, dude. I'm going to do a movie.
Yeah. So I'm excited.
Well, dude, congratulations. And seriously, you need to check out Bad Thoughts on Flicks.
Season two is very exciting.

Speaker 1 I look forward to your movie. You're the man, dude.

Speaker 2 Thank you so much. Appreciate it, man.
It was a lot of fun. Thank you.
Thank you.