S21 E8: (2/2) [Krystyn] I Feel the Need to Fight

S21 E8: (2/2) [Krystyn] I Feel the Need to Fight

August 14, 2024 50m S21E8 Explicit

*Content Warning: distressing topics, sexual abuse of a child, rape, sodomy, murder, violence, childhood abuse, grooming, arson, animal abuse, disordered eating, self harm, gun violence, suicide, strangulation, neglect. 


*Sources:

Death remains under investigation, commercial-news.com: https://www.commercial-news.com › news › local_news


*Resources:

State Child Abuse and Neglect Reporting Numbers: https://www.childwelfare.gov/state-child-abuse-and-neglect-reporting-numbers/?rt=795


Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline: https://www.childhelphotline.org/


The Family Gardener: http://thefamilygardener.com 


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Full Transcript

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Thank you so much for listening. You don't know me.
You don't know me. You don't know anybody until you talk to someone.
The day I got taken, that was my day of freedom. The counselor called my grandma.
She flew all the way from Indiana, my grandmother, on my mom's side, so that she could come get me. She didn't want me to be alone.
My dad, he was in jail. He was on a sex offender registry or something, but he has no record.
So I am happy to hone in on as much details just so people understand like how truly evil he is. I had reached out a couple years ago to try to get the records, my CPS records.
And they said like, fill out this form and they'll take three months to get them. And I was like, okay, I don't know if I really need them right now.
But once you confirmed we're doing this, I filled it out. It came back pretty quickly.
It was 38 pages long. In that report, it essentially states that the day after I was taken, my CPS worker met with my dad and she explained everything to him.
And then he goes on to say the allegations were completely false and that Kristen was just angry that he will not let her date. And he took away her crimping iron.
Mr. Blood said that he has caught her sneaking and having boyfriends at school.
He said that he had a whole box full of notes she was written talking about boyfriends. Mr.
Blood said that all the children have had had a difficult time with their mother's death because her boyfriend did it and got away with it. Mr.
Blood said that Kristen holds him partially responsible for her mother's death because when Kristen was with her mother, her boyfriend did not beat her as much. Mr.
Blood said that the court awarded him custody of the children because their mother was using drugs. She asked him about the allegations, and he said that the child's grandmother, my lovely grandma, put the ideas in my head and made me say these things that it was all false.
And Mr. Blood said, he's talking about the 15-year-old that was babysitting me.
He said that she was asking about having sex with him. And also Mr.
Blood said he never purchased alcohol for her. He would not make eye contact when she asked him any questions about sexual abuse.
Mr. Blood said he was arrested in 1992 and charged for child molestation.
It went to trial and he was not convicted. Mr.
Blood did not ask one time how's his daughter doing that's been taken. Even if I had made this all up, this elaborate story about him, wouldn't you care how your daughter's doing? Then it says my interview, Kristen said her father, Warner O'Blood, made her have sex with him.

As she got older, he would offer her money to do it. She said that this last time she made a deal with him to have sex at least once a week for six months in order to stay with her friends.
She said that he took all her stuff because he wanted her to on his birthday. But she said no because she was tired.
seeing the interviews with the police. I remember them getting frustrated.
It's not in here,

but them getting frustrated. It's not in here, but them getting frustrated that I didn't want to use the words penis and vagina because I'd been conditioned to not say them.
It like grossed me out. My grandma didn't know.
She's like, Kristen, did he put his penis in your vagina? I was like, grandma, no, stop. I couldn't stand the words.
Now I can say them, okay. But in the beginning, for a long time after that, it bothered me to no end.
If you look through this report, you'll see they did not rush this investigation whatsoever. I don't think it was handled anywhere near what it would be handled like today.
I would hope at least, but it was handled pretty awful. I remember him recording and like having videos.
So if I'm somewhere on the dark web, it would not surprise me. I had mentioned it to a police officer in the interview and they're like, oh, this could potentially be a federal case.
But by the time they went and searched my dad's house with a warrant, several, several days had passed. So of course, any evidence of that after knowing he had been caught is going to be disposed of unless you're an idiot.
If you read the medical exam, it's very telling. I'll just read that verbatim.
On 11-21-08 at 9.40 a.m., my caseworker picked me up at school and transported her to CAC for her medical appointment. She was seen by a doctor and then the assistant spoke with caseworker.
She reported to caseworker that there was no question that the child had been repeatedly raped. She said that her vaginal area had the appearance of a sexually active woman in her 30s or one who had given birth.
CM had to take Kristen to the hospital next door to have blood drawn. Kristen had never had blood, given blood before and was very nervous, but did very well.
CM took her to lunch afterward. She did not talk much the entire day.
She would listen to the radio in the car and only talked a little at lunch. CM did tell her that CM was proud of her for how well she had done and how brave she was being.
That's the extent of the medical exam. Did he really think like what he had done to me day in and day out for years didn't do a toll on my body? The medical exam, reading it verbatim, I like bawled my eyes out when I got it.
It was just like, I couldn't understand like how someone who's going to father could do that to like their child. I look at my children.
I love them so much. My daughter's age I was when he started.
I can't imagine the pain. Her being so afraid of her own parents.
When I had to get my medical exam done, they had a male doctor do it. That should not be a thing.
If a girl's coming in for sexual assault, molestation, especially by a male, you would at least maybe ask. And I remember he did a full breast exam.
He was squeezing my breast. This is what y'all are putting me through right after.
It just seemed very wrong. Or at least ask.
He didn't even ask. He was just like, yeah, I'm going to do this now.
When I tell people, they're like, are you fucking serious right now? Did they ever give you a court victim advocate? No, I wasn't allowed to sit in the trial. I asked my aunt about it recently and she said that I didn't want her to sit in the trial.
So she didn't. I lived with her that was about to live with her.
I was embarrassed for her to like know what I went through. I didn't want people to know about it, but my grandma did sit in.
She was the one who told me a lot of the details. The counselor who helped me, one of her friends was in the jury.
Did she testify? Like who else testified? Do you know? I know the police officer did. I know I did.
And my dad did. I even told the police about where we would go with the UPS trucks and stuff.
When the cop was asked about it in court during the trial, he essentially said he never went to check to see if it was a possibility for him to do what I had said. Like, he didn't go check out the area, see if you could park between them.
Which, I don't know, it doesn't surprise me anymore. But it is sad that you finally have the courage to tell someone who finally does something and then like it still doesn't matter.
It was horrible. The biggest thing, which was used against me later in court, was that I had this idea of love.
I never had a boyfriend really. The closest thing I had was my boyfriend quotation marks in my last year I lived with my dad in the sixth grade.
The most I did like, hold their hand. That was it.
And that was a lot for me. Like I was obsessed with the idea of love.
I would watch all the romantic comedies in the world. I would read all of those books too by Nicholas Sparks.
I would just think I was in love with every boy I had a crush on. He called me boy crazy in the CPS records.
I'm like, yeah, that was true. But also he was claiming that why my physical exam looked the way it did is because I just had so many boyfriends that I was just having sex with.
In the sixth grade, I was like, sir, you didn't even let me leave the house to go to church. When am I having time at 10 years old and 11 years old to like go have sex with a billion boys? I did not say the things I would say now.
I was 14. I had dyed my hair black and they used that against me.
His lawyer was saying like, oh, so you wanted to move to Indiana and dye your hair black. So that's why you made this up because you want to date boys.
For them to get a knock guilty, that means the jury believed his side or at least somewhat did, that I was so sexually active and that I just wanted to be free. It's truly disturbing that a jury could find him not guilty.
I kind of hope doing this podcast makes people come out of the woodwork and be like, hey, I was a jury on this trial and this is why we didn't convict him. And I tried to get the records from it.
And I guess because he was not guilty, he was able to get it expunged from the records, the whole court trial, all of it, which I find ridiculous. He's gotten away with it.
How many times? Like if you look up his criminal record, the only thing you find on there is I think domestic violence. And like he had a charge from when he escaped prison with another pedophile, There's nothing that shows he's an actual pedophile.
At least it's in CPS record. If he were to apply to work at a daycare, they would see it was proven that he did do it to me.
But it's just crazy to me that if someone looks up his records, like a background check, it's not going to come up unless he's trying to work at a place that has kids. He can live right next to a school.
He can babysit children. I had a very guilty conscience about telling on him for the next few years.
During the court case, I didn't lie, but they would ask me, like, did he touch you there? And I would say, yes, he did. But he was a good dad.
You love your dad when you're a kid. Like, you want to believe that they love you.
He told me if I told, I would my brothers and I did. So it was like, oh, he was right all along.
I should have just dealt with it for a few years. My brothers could have been happy.
I hated myself for telling. For the next two, three years, I would like cry every night because my brothers had to go live with my dad's mom, who's like a terrible person.
I felt so bad for them and they hated me. Like my brothers didn't talk to me for probably four or five years after.
They were mad at me because they were brainwashed into thinking that I made up what was happening to me. I don't necessarily blame them, but I remember reaching out to the pastor of this church that we went to.
I was like, I really need help connecting with my brothers. I miss them a lot.
And I wanted to know if you thought it would be a good idea for me to come to the church. I really enjoyed it there and I miss everybody there.
The pastor of this church was like, no, I don't think you should come. And was not apologetic to anything that had happened to me.
It kind of seemed like he didn't believe it happened to me either. Like he was angry that I said something.
It just gives me a very sour view of that church specifically, but also of religion because people like my dad to this day is like, God forgives me. So whatever I have done in the past doesn't matter because my God has forgiven me.
After this happens, you're with your grandmother? Where are you living? I lived with my grandma and my grandpa i think it was 2008 2009 potentially 2010 whenever i was a freshman in high school when i lived with my grandparents they didn't have a lot of room their house is like a summer home that was never meant to be lived in full-time but they made it work and they had a closet that they had renovated to be my bedroom and they let me paint it whatever color i wanted so So I picked lime green, which sounds sad, but that was the best that they could do. They didn't have a lot of money.
I ended up actually getting pretty bullied at some point while I lived there. Everyone found out what happened to me because I started telling people and it got to the point where an ex-boyfriend, he would message people and be like, don't date her.
You'd have to have a 10 by 4 put in so you wouldn't fall into her vagina.

She's so like stretched out or something like that because of her dad. So then I went to live with my aunt and uncle, which is my mother's brother and his wife.
I lived with them until I went to college, but I moved to Texas when I was 17 because my uncle's job relocated from Chicago. It was difficult.
We have a much better relationship now. My aunt and I are very different people.
And my uncle's very timid and doesn't like to talk about things that much. I love them both.
But at the time, I was very traumatized, quiet, and would get very easily upset. I cried at the drop of a hat.
It took me a very long time to get remotely healed from everything because I was so unwilling to be healed too. Like I was not willing to do a lot of work at that age.
So I was probably not a fun teenager to have. Now we're closer and we get along now that I'm not like a traumatized 16 year old in her home.
The last time I went to visit her, she has a couple of kids and they're kind of close to my kid's age. She told me that apparently my father, when they still lived in Indiana, had showed up at my school.
I had seen him and I was freaked out. I don't even remember that.
And she had to go to the police station and get a restraining order put on him. And there is evidence.
The invasion of privacy charge in Indiana, that's actually what that's from. And I didn't know that until a couple months ago.
She's protective. She was always a bit angry at my brothers because of the way they ostracized me for the first few years.
She had a lot less forgiveness to give them than I do because I was in the home with them. So I understood it a bit better.
Then I went to college, got married, got divorced, had a baby in between there. I am Kelly Kristen.
She's so genuine. She is very, very down to earth.
She's so easy to talk to. She's very demure, kind of self-effacing.
So she might be a little quiet at first when you meet her. She's a little soft-spoken, but she just has this cult.
People just open up to her because she's an excellent listener. We're both also just a little awkward.
Similar sense of humor. If you get us together, we'll just giggle for hours and hours.
I see what happened to her in childhood affecting her in adulthood. You kind of have to cope and learn things the hard way, especially if you don't have the supports that you should, but you have harm.
You just don't have those specific infrastructures in your brain to allow you to develop those healthy relationships. So I see her in these patterns.
I met Kristen in the fall of 2014. We were both going to school together in undergrad.
We sat down together and we clicked in a way that was so immediate. We lived together for a couple of years.
We were roommates. I had moved back with my parents and she was looking for honestly just like a way out of her current situation.
I was like, hey, let's just solve that together. When did Kristen first start sharing with you about her past? I think it started out with her telling me stuff about her relationship with her ex-husband.
She had gotten pregnant. She had had a baby.
She was living in Houston at the time and she would just call me when shit was going down. She had to lock herself in a bathroom to put a wall between her and him.
And that was opening of the door to me kind of like seeing that ongoing trauma that was happening. So I guess maybe after like six months of hanging out together and getting closer, we would just like hang out in my apartment.
It would just come up naturally. I'd talk about my parents and then she would just be like, my mother passed away.
And then she would talk about how she doesn't talk to her dad anymore. When you find someone that you establish that sense of safety, you kind of open up.
You see that affect her in other ways. Like she used to have panic attacks when we lived together.
She was just like knocking on my door and asked to like crawl into the bed and we would just lay there. And it's just the companionship of not being alone.
I think the like more detail that she would give about what happened with her and her dad, it's just stuff that you can't imagine.

She would listen to these podcasts that take you to such dark places. And she'd be like, you know, since I have lived through it, it makes me feel like there's a connection between my story and their stories.
her experience is just so much more than you ever hear watching like an episode of some murder mystery show or something like that. It's just so explicit.
That's probably the most shocking part. And then also the fact that he still has kids that live with him and the fact that he got off totally scot-free even though they had like physical evidence and she testified at such a young age.

At this point in my life, I'm like, yeah, that's not shocking the way the justice system is just

set up and how laws are always written from the perspective of men and never from the perspective

of a woman or a child. But you just think that there had to have been something

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I think it was 2021.

I found out Arthur was dating a new woman.

So I found her on Facebook, found her son, messaged him, told him everything like, your mother's in danger. If you don't believe me, I'm sorry.
And he was like, oh, I had heard that there was a rumor that he had killed someone, but it really bothered him. And then I called the detective on the case and I recorded that.
The steps that the prosecutor indicated were necessary to file charges. Following the investigation, I signed your mother's death certificate as a homicide.
To this day, I still believe it was a homicide. We hired a blood spatter expert from Tippecanoe County Sheriff's Office, who specialized and had given lectures all across the country on proving what happened in the death scene by analyzing the blood cast off or the blood spatter on the walls in the surrounding area.
We actually removed the door and the chair from the scene,

and it was taken to the prosecutor's office.

This blood spatter expert met with us in the sheriff's office.

The prosecutor's office presented his case,

and at that time the prosecutor was Terry Martin.

He told us he just needed this much more for him to move ahead. We actually purchased a black powder pistol like Arthur bought in downtown Attica just a day or two before your mother's death.
So that we could do ballistics on it and do a comparison.

In the meantime, we could never take enough evidence that our office, the coroner's office, or law enforcement couldn't supply him with enough evidence that he would file charges against Arthur Vance.

I was contacted by the chief of police in Attica that Arthur Manns had been arrested and was being held in the Lake County Jail. We made arrangements for me to go up and interview him at the jail to try to get more information, and he was just a puke.
He would not give up anything. He was just stone cold and uncooperative.
I think that interview was recorded. We suspect Arthur did this, but your mother just, you know, in the week or so Proceeding her death, she had changed the beneficiary of her life insurance policy from you and your siblings to Arthur Mayer.

And so I signed the death certificate as a homicide. I contacted Harrison Steele Benefits, talked to Mike Reithouse, and I told him, listen, or I asked him about the beneficiaries, and he told me when it had been changed and who it was changed to.
And I said, we got to put a hold on this. Do not pay out to this guy, because I believe he murdered his girlfriend.

And so the last I knew, and Mike had agreed and he's still there, that he would contact me if Arthur Manns tried to cash in on your mom's life insurance policy.

I even tried to come up with a document that he would sign off on and have that life insurance

go to you and your siblings.

And I couldn't get that done. Okay.
I talked to the sheriff a little while ago. He has talked to the current prosecutor, and he's willing to reopen the case and look at it.
Because there's no statute of limitations for homicide. and I don't know if I've told you what you want to hear

but I truly believe And because there's no statute of limitations for homicide.

And I don't know if I've told you what you want to hear, but I truly believe Arthur Manse murdered your mother. Yeah, I know he did.
Do you have any recollection of that night? Were you in the house when it happened? No, I wasn't. But my mom had called me that same week and she was, she had to hide outside of the house to talk on the phone because if he was listening, you know, he would, he was abusive.
So she was telling me that she was going to pack up that week and leave, but she had to do it in secret. So that's how I knew like he had done it.
So I think he might be in jail in Lake County again right now. He's actually not.
I found out he's not because a man messaged me on Facebook, and we talked on the phone, and I guess he's dating his mother. And he's concerned, and he wanted to know my story and find out if it was true.
And he wants my help protecting his his mother essentially well ask him if his mother's changed her life insurance if his mother has life insurance and make sure she hasn't changed the beneficiary over to him okay i will and here's the biggest problem that the the expert that we hired to analyze some blood spatter died from cancer a few years ago. Oh, okay.
Well, I'll do anything I can do personally to help, of course. Okay.
And if you could keep me updated, I would appreciate it. You have my cell phone.
The number I gave you is my cell phone number. I'm still chief deputy with the coroner's office.
I own a funeral home in Windgate, but I'm still active. And if you have any questions, if there's something I haven't thought to tell you and you wonder what it is, you call me.
I'll tell you. If I can remember, I'll try to find my file and reopen that.
Well, thank you. Is there any, like, files that I could personally have that I could look at?

I think you can request maybe from the Atticott Police Department.

I mean, there are some things that are public, the public record that could be shared. But I'll back up and I'll see what I can find out.

Okay.

And see what we have.

Okay?

Okay, thank you. Okay, you take care.
The conversation essentially was, Arthur, he bought the gun that killed my mom like a few days prior. He had tried to change her will to be where he was the beneficiary a few days prior.
And like, I guess she had a necklace and it had been ripped off her neck that night as well and my grandpa says they still have it at the police station they haven't given it back to him he's asked for it time and time again from them everything pointed to murder even on the death certificate which i have says murder and all these things and apparently when that detective brought it to the da at that time the da DA said, this isn't enough. What do you mean that isn't enough? I could not understand.
And then I was crying on the phone. I guess the detective probably felt bad.
He was like, you know what? I'm going to bring this back to the DA and I bet you we can get this taken care of. But then I reached out to the detective several more times because I was telling people like, he's reopening it and things are going to be taken care of.
I even posted about it on Facebook. I had said after 10 years, my mom is finally getting justice.
I reached out and I was like, so did you talk to him? He was like, I'm going to get to it. I would text him and text him.
And he just stopped responding and ghosted me. That's just really disappointing to get someone's hopes up.
Their mother is finally going to get some justice. And this man's finally going to go to jail and he doesn't.
My grandma had died by that point and I was like no one else is fighting for her and I feel the need to fight. I could fight it some more.
I definitely could. I don't know where you're supposed to go when the people who are supposed to help you and do their job aren't doing their job.
The case is still open yet they're not working on it. He's just free.
The only thing I've seen is him get arrested for like drug or domestic violence. He's just there, living his life.
What justice is there in the world when people like that just live free, no consequences? His name is very common. There's like a million Arthur Manns out there, but he's either in Indiana or Illinois right now.
I'm pretty sure unless he moved.

They're saying that they can't charge him. Why? Is it because of her history? They don't find her to be like a worthy enough victim? potentially because she was like a drug addict she had been arrested with Arthur for possession

at the end of the day if no one's really pushing you to do it, some people aren't going to do it. My name is Jake.
Me and Kristen met about four years ago. I got a job at a pizza shop.
She was working there. She helped to train me.
Maybe four months later, took her and her son fishing. And after that, we were together.
Kristen graduated college right before we got involved romantically. I was actually just an actual loser.
I wasn't doing anything with my life. I don't think I'd be here if it wasn't for her.
I was a drug addict. Meeting her kind of gave me the motivation that anyone actually

build a life with somebody. She really is the most inspirational person I've ever met.
She's such a good mom. The hardest working person I've ever met.
I mean, I thought I was a hard worker and she just makes me feel ashamed. I had great parents growing up.
Mine was more mental illness stuff. But I was in and out of like mental facilities, juvies and correctional facilities when I was a teenager.
First time I ever went there, I was 14. So it's been over 10 years.
In my opinion, maybe 75% of the kids that were in there had very troubled homes. And then maybe the other 25% were people like me that just struggled with mental illness.
We're either self-medicating or hurt somebody.

You run into... And then maybe the other 25% are people like me that just struggled with mental illness or either self-medicating or hurt somebody.

You run into a lot of people that have bad childhoods there, but nothing like Kristen, nothing even close to that.

Kristen is like the exception to all that.

I don't understand.

Like she's a one in a million chance of someone having the life that she had and also turned out to be the most amazing person I've ever met. It's kind of hard to believe.
The first time I remember she ever mentioned her dad, we were folding pizza boxes and just kind of in passing, she had mentioned that her dad was a piece of shit. And just by like on the look up on her face, I could tell that she really meant it and that it was something that troubled her.
I don't think she got into too much detail about it. I think she just kind of like wanted to tell me because we were getting more serious.
How did your communication continue after you no longer lived with your dad? Did you have periods of time where you wouldn't speak and then reconnect? I had reached out to him initially. I think I was like 13 or 14.
He was so happy. I was talking to me with host pictures of me from my Facebook on his Facebook.
He'd be like, my beautiful daughter. And he'd put my brothers and like my brother's daughter.
I got to the point where I was like, I'll continue talking to you, but I want you to tell my brothers the truth. I don't care if you tell the police or anything, but I need them to know what you did to me was true.
I don't want them thinking I'm a liar. Like it's ruined our relationship.
But he just refused. He avoided the topic.
He didn't want to reply in a way that made him look guilty. Like we need to leave the past in the past.
And then I would stop talking to him. And then I would talk to him again because I found out he had a son.
I couldn't afford another child, but my dad was going to let him come live with me.

That was most of the reason I stayed in touch.

I was working three or four jobs at one point to support myself and my son at the time because his dad wasn't helping at all.

I wish I would have done it, even though I couldn't really.

Is his mother in the house too?

No, his mother, according to my father, is a drug addict. So he's solely raising this child? Solely.
And that's horrific. I would FaceTime him with my son when my son was like three or four.
And he seemed happy, but you just don't know. I worry for him.
Like, I hope he's okay. Right before my second child was born.
So 2022. I had actually made a plan to go up there to like meet my brother for the first time in person, potentially bring him back.
I ended up not wanting to like bring my child around him. So he was trying to guilt trip me, which didn't work.
He's like, my son is so disappointed. He was crying because his sister didn't come.
And I just kind of stopped responding after a while. Six months before she was born, my daughter, he said, congratulations on the soon to be new arrival.
We love you all. His son spent video chatting a lot, but turns out he missed you guys.
So when are you guys available? Let me know. Five days later, it looks like I said, thank you.
I would like to speak with him more, but have a harder time speaking to you these days than others. I have a son who is as old as I was when I was starting to be horribly abused for years and will soon have a daughter.
I would find it easier to do so if I thought you had stopped, but I don't know what would make you. I wish I did.
I hope one day you do. It does so much more damage than you can even imagine.
I know you don't like to think about it, but I still have nightmares to this day to the point where I have to take medication to help prevent myself from waking up in sweats and screams. I tell you this in the hopes that you think twice before doing it again.
And maybe when I feel like you're truly sorry and ready to be a better person, I'll be ready to talk more. I hope the best for my brother and hope you'll do what's right.
And he responded a month later and said, been so busy with trying to get in hours at work and dealing with health issue in case it progressed further. Been a tad peaceful since his mother got six months in jail.
I've dealt with switching B-Day party dates to accommodate her and foster grandparents and family, causing none of his friends to be able to make the change, and it's happened more than once. His mother even tried to get me to forfeit my rights to sell him to her foster sister and her brother for a mere $2,500.
He was such a sweet boy until she took off with him and his sister for nine months before I got him.

She abandoned the sister after only three weeks.

Now she tried to make a deal with a friend of hers who took her younger two from her,

to try to help her to get the other two,

but it backfired since she wasn't supposed to be living under the same roof as her children that were taken away.

I may not make the kind of money I once did or have a lot of the luxuries, but we get by.

He loves school and really enjoys Boys and Girls Club. I'm trying my best to be the best parent I can be for him.
Been a long road getting to where I'm at. I'm not interested in living in my past as future is keeping me pretty busy, trying to believe I won't lose my battle with cancer as so many of my family has done.
But when it's my time, it's my time, and nothing will change that. My response was, This response with no accountability does not surprise me.
I expected it. You choose not to live in the past because no one who has done what you have done can think they're a good person.
You raped your own daughter since she could walk, while she cried and begged you to stop, among other girls, some of which you made me hold their hands. You can live in your future, but the truth is you should be in jail for the absolute hell I went through because of you and solely you.
A father should protect their children, not hurt them, and then pretend they never did the horrendous, abhorrent things you have. I don't care for your pity party.
But I love how he tried to like throw in there like, oh, I have cancer. He definitely doesn't have anything.
If you truly didn't do those things, he'd be like, I can't believe you're still lying about this. Christy, he doesn't even have the nerve to do that.
When I read that message, I'm like, nowhere in there is there any accountability. I'm not surprised at all.
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Quentin only has 24 hours to sell his car. Is that even possible? He goes to Carvana.com.
What is this? A movie trailer? He ignores the doubters, enters his license plate. Wow, that's a great offer.
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What made you decide to share your TikTok and what was that experience like for you? It was because of that message I sent him where he took no accountability. That was my last ditch effort to be like, let's see if you have some humanity in you.
And I was like, you know what? I'm just going to put it out there. People need to know.
I put it out there like, hey, please stop letting this man watch or come near your children. I know he seems like the most wonderful man in the world because he's very charming and manipulative, but he's not.
You need to be so careful with him. You used his real name in the TikTok? Yes, and I put a picture of him.
Did he respond when you sent the message and you're just basically like, of course, you take no accountability? No, that was it. And I don't think he saw my TikTok originally because I unfriended him and all that.
But then my friend, who I love dearly, she went and found all of his friends on Facebook and sent my TikTok to all of them, including his long lost sister he had just gotten in contact with two years prior, who he was so excited to be in contact with. I'm sure he got some messages.
So he blocked me after that. I don't think he expects me to go on this podcast or he definitely didn't expect me to make a TikTok.
So I'm glad that he blocked me after that because I'm like, people are going to know who you are. That only got like 13,000 views.
I hope he's scared. I hope he doesn't even know about it.
So he doesn't have time to somehow make up some lies to counteract this in advance. I've kind of been an open person, but like I wasn't one to really put that out there.
I used to be really embarrassed. And that's why I applied.
Something was wrong. I need him out there.
People need to know the truth about him because otherwise what happened to me will have happened for nothing, essentially. Like, yes, I'm a good mother despite all that.
And I love my kids. And that made me probably a better mother because of what I went through.
I did what I could. I just feel like I'm not doing enough.
He's on no sex registry, yet he has this prevalent history of doing this over and over again. But if you were to look him up, there's nothing that would really tie him to that except the charge.
You can see the charge of child molestation, but you see that it was dismissed. So you could look at that and be like, oh, it was a misunderstanding.
In the CPS report, it says, my grandma, Miss Roberts said that she is willing to petition for custody and will do whatever it takes to keep her granddaughter safe. Miss Roberts said that Ronnie has been in trouble before.
She said that the victim was six years old and there was a hung jury so he got away with it. Miss Roberts said that there was a 15 year old girl that Ronnie would write letters to while Miss Blood, my mom, was pregnant with her youngest child.
Miss Roberts said that Ronnie's cousin's daughter, the one who was 10, said that Ronnie touched her but that uncle said that he did not believe it. Kristen's mother wanted custody of Kristen because she was afraid that Ronnie would do that.
So my mother, she

definitely had an idea that it was happening. Miss Roberts said that Kristen's mother was murdered

because she was trying to leave her boyfriend so she could get Kristen back. Miss Roberts said

that the judge ordered Mr. Blood not to take the children out of Lake County, which he did.
I guess

they tried to reach out to the caseworker for the 2002 case but they were never able to get in

I'm going to reach out to the caseworker for the 2002 case, but they were never able to get in contact with her. I had talked to the police officer a few weeks ago at this point who was in charge of my case.
He did a horrible job. He didn't own that, but like that's what my family who was in the courtroom said.
They asked him like, did you investigate this instance that she said happened? And he was like, no. I called him.
He finally calls me back. I'm like, oh, do you remember me? And he like pretended to remember me, which becomes very obvious five seconds into the conversation.
So I was like, okay, do you remember what happened with that case? And he's like, yeah, yeah, yeah. I was like, do you remember why he didn't get convicted? He was like, oh, you know, I think we had the wrong guy.
And it actually ended up being somebody else who did it. I was like, no, no, no, no, no.
I'm going to be understanding because this was a long time ago. But no, this was my dad who did it.
And yes, it very much was him. I told him to look into it.
And he said that he did some research, who knows if he did. And he said that because my dad wasn't convicted in Tennessee, you can technically have any court records expunged on your case after a certain amount of time.
So there's absolutely no record of my case, which I find so weird. I understand he wasn't convicted.
How is he allowed to just have that wiped clean? How did you feel after the conversation with him? I don't know. I didn't sit right with me.
If you don't remember me, don't try to like pull something out of your ass. He just didn't sound too concerned.
I was like, you know, he's still doing this to this day, right? This just happened to another little girl that he watched. And he was like, oh no.
I was like, but I know you don't work in whatever county it was. I think my dad lives in Madison, Tennessee now.
And I was like, it's happening there. And he was like, oh no, but I have contacts there.
And I was like, well, if you could look into it, let me know. And he kind of like disregarded that when he called me back a few days later.
And he's like, oh no, I haven't really looked into that just yet, but I will. Just was not concerned.
I was like, sir, be concerned if I'm telling you this is still happening. One of the most incredible pieces about your story and your resilience is your career in child advocacy and the work you do now.
Can you explain a bit to the listeners about what it is that you do? I went and got my undergrad in psychology and criminal justice. I originally tried to become a cop and wanted to be eventually in a detective role where I'm specifically helping domestic violence or children.
That didn't work out. While I was in college, I ended up working at mental hospitals with my history with eating disorders.
I also ended up working at an eating recovery center for a while, which was actually my favorite job to this day. I loved working with the kids there.
And if I could go back there, I will. The youngest we ever had there was 10 and the oldest is 17.
I also worked with adults, but the kids is where I really loved being. During the meals, because you know, those can be the hardest times.
I would just do like goofy things with them. I would just sing this song to them.
I sounded ridiculous, but it made them laugh. So it was nice to be that little bit of sunshine for the children there.
And I ended up only leaving there because I got into APS, Adult Protective Services. It was hard because the hours were long when you have kids and you're trying to do another job at the same time.
I just was so burnt out from working the three or four jobs and doing my undergrad at the same time. I was like, I should really take a break.
I started doing antidepressants around that time and I ended up getting serotonin syndrome. So I was working my fifth 12-hour shift straight and I was just going insane.
I almost thought about checking myself into a facility because I just felt so awful. And it turned out that's what it was.
I went to APS. I did that for a little bit.
But again, it wasn't exactly what I wanted. I did work CPS right before I got pregnant, all my pregnancy and right after I had her.
And I really tried. But there was just some things with it.
CPS just needs more funding. People would tell me left and right, like, you get paid to take away my kids.
I'm like, no, I really don't. There was a girl, she was nonverbal and autistic.
And the report was that she got punched in the face by her dad. And I interviewed all the kids.
And they were all like, yep, that happened. It's happened more than once.
They were like, well, does she have any marks or bruises? I was like, no, because this happened last week. Well, did she make an outcry? No, she's nonverbal.
And because of that, there was nothing they would let me do, which I just found insane. And then from there, I went to interview the mother and the mother said, the kids are remembering it wrong.
Like a lot of my kids have chronic nose bleeds. I interviewed the dad and I guess she forgot to tell him the lie she made up because when I asked him about that, he said, no, none of my kids get chronic nosebleeds.
Even with that information, they had me close the case because there was nothing that they could let me do. So CPS, there's something that has to change there.
I was freshly postpartum having a newborn with how little I was actually able to do to help the children that I was working with, I ended up being like, I need to prioritize my family. And now I'm kind of just trying to figure out what I want to do.

I would like to find another path where I'm helping children again

I wouldn't mind going back to the eating recovery center

since I am a surrogate I'll have a bit more freedom

to like kind of do what I want to do and not have to worry about money as much

I also might go and get my master's, but that's kind of where I am career-wise. I just want to do something where I'm able to actually help.
How do you come to terms with a childhood like what you experienced? What was your healing journey like? It was very long. I was definitely not the best person at times.
I had a very bad attachment. I'm very anxious.
So that made me a very bad girlfriend at times. I would be very suspicious because that's all I saw was my dad being suspicious of my mom growing up.
And that made me very even anxiously attached to my friends. I felt easily ignored, even if they weren't doing anything to me, I would feel like they were.
When I moved with my grandma, she was like, you need therapy, you need to go. And I just did not want to go.
I did not want to talk about it. It wasn't until after I had kids that I really started to heal.
I don't know what it is about becoming a mom, but that turned me into a way better person. Eventually, I did become a better partner.
I still have some anxious type things, but I'm a lot better than I used to be. I'm more calm.
Antidepressants definitely helped. I got married young and that was not a good marriage.
It was also traumatizing in its own way, but at least I learned what not to look for in a partner. And now being with someone who is a loving father and like literally loves their child more than anybody, that's also healing to see someone love their children the same way I do.
And doing this, honestly, is very healing because I didn't

really understand certain things about myself until I did this. Things that should have been

obvious, but they weren't. Whenever you hear these stories and think about people who have

gone through these things, you're not like seeing it like, oh, as a person that just has to take it

day by day. I've seen like a shift in how she perceives herself and how she's really coming

to her own and getting this agency. I just love seeing my friends blossom and grow like that.
Whenever I moved out here from Texas, I was like, I hope she's okay. I hope she can stand on her own.
We had been rocks for each other for so long. I think she's more open about it than she used to be.

She's definitely a fighter.

She has that renewed sense of energy to pursue the case than she did whenever I first met her.

She was definitely going through a lot, watching her meander,

and then finally get to this place where she's really being valued in her current job.

And I think she's always wanted to give back as best she could to kids for experiencing the same as she was. But it's great to see that she is making progress in that aspect.
She's thriving. I was conditioned where this is normal.
This is what parents do to their kids. And if I would have had someone to say like, hey, this isn't normal.
This is abuse and you need to tell someone and it's not your fault, then it could have been completely different. I'm always going to be a little fucked up and I'm always going to have a little bit of trust issues while it's a lot better than it used to be.
The way we were wired as a kid, it takes a lot to unlearn certain things. I've never viewed myself as a survivor until I talked to you, so it is nice to have a different way of putting it.
I started listening to Something Was Wrong probably three years ago. What really got me going to send in my submissions to Something Was Wrong and other podcasts was actually Sarah Turney, her Voices for Justice podcast.

A lot of different podcasts are not victim focused.

You and her very much are.

Y'all are drawing attention to people whose voices really do need to be heard.

So I just really appreciate that.

I appreciate you so much for saying that.

I don't know how to thank you for the amount of emotional energy and vulnerability that you have given, what you've lived through. It's absolute hell.
It makes you question humanity itself. I just think about all of the people that you're going to help by sharing and by outing this person.
And I'm very, very grateful to you for that.

Thank you again.

You're one of the reasons I do this.

You made me more brave.

Your podcast is always going to be one of my favorites

for that very reason,

even if you hadn't given me the opportunity

to tell my story, but I really appreciate it.

Next time on Something Was Wrong. I opened up to her and I told her what I had done over the summer.
I was crying because I was in a really dark place. I just remember her looking at me and being so stone cold.
She honestly looked at me like she hated me. I just wasn't expecting that sort of reception from somebody who is a Christian leader at Bethel.
I thought we're supposed to be loving, and she looked at me like she was disgusted, and I was crying. And she said, you're crying, and you want me to feel bad for you.
You are trying to manipulate me and I don't feel bad for you at all. The entire congregation got totally silent because a lot of people knew that we were dating.
Ted said, well, yeah, my girlfriend's name is Jubilee. And the prophet started laughing and he said, well, God is giving you this girl.
And cheers erupt throughout the entire auditorium. The residents who were from Reading really hated Bethel.
They hated that we were taking over their city. And in hindsight, I totally see it because you couldn't go somewhere without running into a Bethel person.

There's Bethel students everywhere. He ended up emailing everybody saying that he was also somebody who was supposed to be a student and that he had arrived to Bethel a few weeks early because he wanted to get settled in the area.
And that he had seen a lot of questionable things at Bethel. He sent out a mass email essentially accusing Bethel of teaching false words

and saying that everybody should cancel being a student and go back home.

He basically accused Bethel of being a cult.

Thank you so much for listening. Until next time, stay safe, friends.
Something Was Wrong is a Broken Cycle Media production created and hosted by me, Tiffany Reese. If you'd like to support the show further, you can share episodes with your loved ones, leave a positive review, or follow Something Was Wrong on Instagram

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