Stop Lying to Yourself - 20 Things I Quit to Simplify My Life

Stop lying to yourself.

I'm going to share with you 20 things that I quit to simplify my life to focus on what actually matters.

Because when kids come up to me and I'm driving one of my supercars, they always ask me, hey man, what do you do?

And I always say the same thing.

It's not what I do, it's what I don't do.

Welcome to the Martel Method.

I went from rehab at 17 to building a $100 million empire and being a Wall Street Journal best-selling author.

In this podcast, I'll show you exactly how to build a life and business you don't grow to hate.

And make sure you don't miss anything by subscribing to my newsletter at martel method.com starting with the first thing i quit trying to separate work and life for me i integrate both things i don't want to make it separate i want my family to be around when i'm working i want my workmates to be around when i'm playing i just realize if i'm going to travel the world and try to live life to the fullest then everybody is going to be part of that life i don't keep them separate the second thing i quit is eating because of my emotions if you can't control what you put in your mouth trust me it will affect your confidence because confidence is a byproduct of keeping the commitments you make to yourself in private and you know what you should be eating.

The third is caring what other people think.

When I look at my life and the pain I've gone through and realizing that if I made decisions based on what other people thought I should do, guess who wasn't there when I was in pain?

And if they haven't done the thing that I want to do and I care about their opinion and I use that to make decisions, now I'm living somebody else's life.

When I take my last breath, I want to know that I live my life.

The fourth thing I quit is thinking short term instead of long term.

If you want to build a life, it's going to take time.

If you want to be successful, it's going to take time.

If you try to take shortcuts, guess what?

It'll burn you every time.

Investing in long-term decisions with long-term people, playing long-term games is how you win in life.

Number five is having a rigid morning routine.

It's kind of crazy because I always ask people that have like the 37 hour, 17 step morning routine.

What if you don't have it?

Does that mean like the rest of your day is shot?

You can't enjoy yourself.

My whole thing is being fluid.

There's key things that I do that takes literally minutes to reset and center.

Other than that, those are just bonuses not required for me to have a great day.

Number six is canceling meetings last minute.

I used to think it was okay to reschedule, reset, and push things off.

The problem was I was telling myself that my priorities weren't important.

And guess what?

Other people don't want to work with people they can't depend on.

And every time I let my feelings or my mood affect where I showed up or how I performed it bit me in the butt number seven is having notifications on my phone this device is a professional distractor device and if you allow it to bug you to vibrate to ring to ding you will not be able to get into flow state you won't be able to do the work the biggest thing robbing you from focus is the distraction that comes from this little device number eight is having lots of meetings what i thought was productive was literally a distraction allowing people to take my calendar and make me busy and then not having the time to actually think.

Did you know there's only one or two really important decisions you have to make every day?

And if you don't have the space to actually think about those decisions, then you'll just get bogged down by being busy, but not moving forward.

There's a massive difference between busy people and productive people.

And being in meetings all day is just giving you permission to avoid the real big decisions.

Number nine is trying to remember every freaking detail.

I got to tell you, my dad used to ask me all the time, like, hey, Dan, what about this part of the business, that part of the business?

And I was like, dad, I don't know.

And guess what?

I got okay with that because the need to remember everything is going to cause you from actually focusing on the things that are important.

Can I get the answer?

Yes.

Do I need to remember and memorize everything?

No.

Create the space in your brain to be able to make better decisions.

Number 10, alcohol.

partying or honestly any vice.

When I looked at my life, I realized that success is not about adding a bunch of stuff.

It's actually about taking things away.

And the more I subtracted, I added to my life.

I know that your next level is on the other side of you actually giving something up.

You might not want to hear this.

You might think it's okay to vape.

You might think it's okay to gamble.

You might think it's okay to play video games.

I know that you know that next level is going to require you to kill that devil.

Number 11 is answering random phone calls.

Did you know in your phone, you can, there's a setting, there's a toggle.

It says any unknown number, send immediately to voicemail.

That's a pro move, but I just stop answering my phone.

Why?

If I made a commitment to get something done, that thing has to get done.

If somebody else wants my time, they can wait until I'm done.

I just write down their name and call them back when I'm finished.

Number 12, trying to finish every book that I started.

It's so funny how some people are like, did you finish the book?

Did you read that book?

I might have read the first chapter, maybe the third chapter.

If it was good, I got to the fifth chapter.

Every once in a while, a book's gonna keep my attention to the very end.

I don't need to read the whole book.

I'm just looking for one thing that I think can change my whole perspective, one nugget, one idea that'll give me something to move forward with.

Once I got that, I might close the book, put it down, and never visit it again, and that's okay number 13 multitasking in general see most people think they can multitask it's actually fake it's a focus tasking so you go one two three four five six seven eight nine ten try to go a b c d e f g now go one a two b three c see how much slower it is your multitasking is actually fake lock and load focus and get the thing done before trying to do too many things at once before we get back to the episode if you want to jumpstart your week with my top stories and tactics be sure to subscribe to the Martel Method newsletter.

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Number 14, spending time with people that suck my energy.

I had to get really honest, and it was hard because I was scared it was going to piss people off.

to start choosing folks that when I spent time with them, when I talked to them, they gave me energy.

They made me feel good about myself.

Like it's so crazy how it could be family members and friends, but it could also be people you used to look up to that all of a sudden start criticizing because you're making more progress in them.

You need to protect your energy and do a friend ventory and get rid of those energy vampires.

Number 15, trying to make everybody happy.

Here's what I learned.

Their reality is their reality.

I'm not responsible for the reality they found themselves in.

And I have no problem realizing some of my decisions may not make them happy, but if I know I'm doing them with the right intention, then that's on them to figure out their own story.

Number 16, staying up late at night.

I got to tell you, I turned into a pumpkin at 9 p.m.

and I'm okay with it.

Last night I had a big dinner and I told everybody before I showed up, hey, if it goes late, that's cool, but I'm going to peace out.

And I did.

Why?

I'd rather upset a few people by going to bed early so that I have my mornings and I'm not groggy and tired.

Because when I think of my life, I want to be focused.

I care about my energy in the morning.

I'm not going to ruin that by staying up late because somebody's got some social hour thing they want to do.

What's funny is most people have an alarm that goes off to wake them up.

I have an alarm that goes off to tell me to go to bed.

Number 17, blaming other people.

If you realize that your whole life, your situation, everything is 100% your fault and you are accountable for your creation, you will give yourself power.

I don't want to give somebody else the power on my life.

Number 18, saying yes to everyone.

Here's what's crazy is the more you grow, the more people will want to ask you for things.

The more you expand who you are and embedded your life, people will want to take some of your time.

Learning to say no is the key.

Saying yes to everybody will only lead you disappointed.

So here's my philosophy.

Sometimes we have to say no today to other people to say yes to the goals that we plan for ourselves.

Number 19, overthinking every damn decision.

I had a mentor of mine say to me once, he said, the point of leadership is making decisions with imperfect data.

If you got 70% of what you need to know, decide.

Don't get stuck in the analysis paralysis.

Most people are worried about making the right decision.

I'm about making a decision and figuring out how to make it right.

Number 20 was stop comparing myself to other people.

The thing you actually may be inspired by me for is being me, 100% me.

The most unique thing that you can do is be you.

So here's the deal.

You didn't live somebody else's life.

I don't have other people's bodies.

I don't have their brains.

I have me.

The only person I compare myself to is me from yesterday.

If you do that, you will live a life that is uniquely yours.

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