
I'm 45. If You're in your 20's or 30's Watch THIS
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At the time of this recording, I’m 45 years old and a multi-millionaire.
But if I could sit down with my 20 or 30-year-old self, I’d have a lot to say.
In this episode, I’m sharing the 45 most important lessons I’ve learned about building wealth, avoiding mistakes, and accelerating success.
If you want to get rich faster—and skip the painful detours—this is the advice I wish someone gave me.
Listen and Follow Along
Full Transcript
At the time of this recording, I'm a 45-year-old multimillionaire. But if I had to go back and teach my 20 or 30-year-old self how to get rich even faster, these are the 45 things I would share.
Number one, winners lose more than losers ever will. If you think about it, to be masterful at something, you actually have to fail way more than a beginner even tries.
Number two, broke people spend time to save money, rich people spend money to save time. You can't outwork the problem of your skills not being good enough to make more money.
So if you keep trying to trade your time for money, you'll always be stuck as a prisoner. Number three, say yes until you can afford to say no.
When you start, you have to say yes to opportunities to figure out what's going to work and what's not going to work. Once you actually find a winning formula, learning to say no to create the space for you to execute is the killer strategy.
Number four, you don't get rich until you feel rich. If you don't feel like a millionaire, if you don't walk around and act with that energy, then you'll never create the circumstance that pulls that into your life.
You'll always push it away because you don't feel worthy. Number five, money doesn't change you.
It just amplifies who you already are. If you're a ding dong, trust me, you'll be a rich ding dong.
If you're a great person that does good for other people, more money will just make you even better for the world. Number six, you've never gotten better when things were easy.
If you look back at every point in your life where you've grown, where you've expanded yourself, it came on the back end of you having to do something hard. It's on the back end of a puzzle that you solve that gives you new skills and perspective to make your life better.
Number seven, normalize leaving people in whatever reality they've chosen. At the end of the day, you can only control how you respond to things.
And guess what? That means everybody's responsible for how they respond to things. And if their reality is polluted and negative and not supportive of your dreams and goals, leave them there.
Allow that to be the norm. You don't have to convince everybody to see things your way.
Number eight, hard work beats talent when talent doesn't work. I know so many people that are so freaking talented, but they never apply themselves that I see other people that just show up repeatedly, almost incessantly.
It's like the most magical thing to watch them be determined and disciplined and then win bigger than the talented people. And they're left confused how that other person succeeded.
Number nine, your reality is a reflection of your most dominant thoughts, actions, and feelings. It's how the world is.
It's how it's always been. Your life is a mirror of how you see it.
So if you keep the possibility at the forefront and you execute from that thought, those actions, how that feels, your life will become what you see. Number 10, the pain of regret outweighs the pain of failure every time.
When I'm taking my last breath and I'm sitting there and I'm looking back at my life, I'm going to have way more angst and frustration for the things I didn't even try versus the things that I did that didn't work out because the things that didn't work out just shaped me as a character. Whereas the things I didn't even try, that's where the regret lies.
Number 11, never fight down. If somebody talks crap about you, but they aren't where you want to be, you don't admire their situation in the world, you have to let it go.
People don't realize that if you're wasting your energy with people that are below you or to the side that aren't on the path you're on, don't even bother. Always fight up, never fight down.
Number 12, no one needs a change for you to win. You can go the rest of your life hoping that your girlfriend and your parents and your best friends all change to see things the way you see it.
But I'm telling you, that's just feedback to you to realize where you're not free. I've gotten to the place where nobody has to change for me to win.
I don't need anybody to say yes. I don't need anybody to see the future my way.
The sooner you can get there, the faster you're going to move forward. Number 13, put your own mask on before trying to help others.
When I got out of rehab at 17 years old, I was out there trying to help everybody else. And the truth was I was so early on my journey that it was dangerous for me to be doing that.
I needed to gain the reps and the reputation of my own sobriety of keeping myself safe before I tried to help anybody else. And I noticed that in business and life all the time, people have a little wind.
They go to the gym once and they think everybody should go to the gym. Put your mask on, get a bicep vein, get healthy, get your vices taken care of before you start trying to help other people.
Number 14, fear will always give bad advice. Whenever I've got a big decision that gives me anxiety or I always try to flip it to the possibility.
So your parents will always give you advice based on fear. They don't want to see you hurt.
People that have been there or people admire are always going to tell you to go for it because they're focused on the possibility. So your parents will always give you advice based on fear.
They don't want to see you hurt. People that have been there or people you admire are always going to tell you to go for it because they're focused on the possibility, not on the potential of loss.
Number 15, always assume positive intent. I call this API, assume positive intent.
So if somebody cuts me off in traffic, my default is somebody they love is in the hospital and there's an emergency going on. Not what most people do, which is, screw that person and why'd they cut me off and get all upset and ruin the rest of their day.
Change your perspective as a default response and you'll change the rest of your life. Number 16, don't dim your light to make other people comfortable.
If you are different, be different. If you are extra, be extra.
If you are bright, be bright, shine your light, be that person. If that's too much for them, tell them to go find less.
Number 17, some people will never forgive you for what they did to you. You did nothing.
Their interpretation of what happened is they're insulted, they're hurt, they're frustrated with you, and they will never forgive you for that. You have to be okay with that.
Number 18, nobody pays you if nobody knows you. In today's world, your ability to be known for your skills, your character, your reputation, that's why you'll get paid.
Many people say attention is the new oil. You have to have people aware of who you are to make the big money.
Number 19, don't build bridges for people who only bring matches. I can't tell you the amount of people I've had to cut out of my life because every positive thing that I brought to their attention, they always found some way to cut it down.
So if you have people in your life that are always pulling out the matches when you're trying to build a bridge in a relationship, just let them go burn that bridge and move on. Number 20 spend more time with people chasing a common future instead of people with a common past.
Just because you sat next to somebody in math class does not mean that you have to be friends with them today. Your life gets a lot easier trying to build something you've never done before when you're around people that are on that common journey.
Number 21, you don't create success, you attract success. Who do you think somebody wants to help? The person that's always talking about the news or complaining about people or the person that always sees options and possibilities and has an expansive mindset.
See, most people think they got to do, do, do to create their future. And the truth is you have to become an attractive character to attract opportunities into your life because they're all around you every day.
Number 22, the person who needs nothing can't be controlled. This is my problem with school.
It teaches kids to be in a manufacturing system, a cog in a wheel. What you wanna do is get to a place where you don't have to get anything from any person to feel good about yourself.
That person can't be controlled by the system. Number 23, people who are doing shit are too busy to talk shit.
If you're around people and their default is to talk shit, I need you to understand that person has nothing going on in their life. When your head's down grinding and building and creating, you don't have time to even pay attention to the stuff you got to do, let alone talk crap about other people.
Cut those folks out of your life. Number 24, whatever you aren't changing, you are choosing.
If you have some issue in your life, a person, a circumstance, an unhad conversation, you are choosing that scenario because you haven't said anything. So if you want to change it, say something and move forward.
Number 25, 99% of your problems could be solved with discipline. When I look at all the times that I was not making the kind of progress that I wanted to make, and I blame the economy and I blame my team.
The truth was is I wasn't being disciplined in my life. I wasn't keeping the commitments that I made to myself.
All your problems, most of them could be salvages discipline. Number 26, create more, consume less.
Instead of complaining about social media, stop consuming it so much. Why don't you go create some content? Social media could be used as the most powerful personal development tool if you choose by creating the content for other people to consume.
Number 27, your work ethic is a reflection of your gratitude. If you have any success so far in life, there was a moment back in the day when you thought to yourself, if this could ever happen, I'd feel set.
The goal that you set for yourself is literally your reality today and your work ethic about how you show up today to honor the fact that you've gotten to that place is the way you show gratitude for what you've got. Number 28, you receive what you desire for others.
Think about it. Why are billionaires billionaires? Because they help more people than millionaires.
The moment you stop making it about you and how much money you can make and and you start making it about other people and how many people you can serve, your whole life will shift. Stop being so greedy and start being more selfless.
Number 29, exhaust the body, tame the mind. I know a lot of people when they're young, they go to the gym to get the bicep veins and to look jacked.
I get that. The reality is over time, working out works on your mind.
Every day I go work out. Yes, it's to make sure I have the energy and the health and the stamina
to be able to push. But more importantly, it resets my mind.
Number 30, no one is coming to
save you. I wish that your parents could help you.
I wish that I could help you. I wish your partner
could help you. But the truth is nobody, including the government or the economy is going to come fix your situation.
The only person that can do that is the one you see in the mirror. Number 31, the energy you put into your work is felt by the receiver.
I learned this when I published my book, Buy Back Your Time. The moment it got released, I thought it'd be wild if I could sell 4,000 copies in the first week.
We ended up selling over 20,000 copies. Why? I poured my soul into every word in that book and people could feel it.
They felt seen. They felt the gratitude for the work.
The energy you bring to creating anything in your life is felt by the person who receives it. Number 32, perfectionism is just procrastination in disguise.
Everybody wants to wait for the thing to be great. The problem is, is that by the time you get it great, somebody else has already done it.
The real entrepreneurs out there, the real builders out there, they don't wait till it's great, they default to done. And the people that hold back on that, they're lying to themselves by trying to say they gotta be perfect.
If you're not embarrassed by the thing you put out into the world, you've waited way too long. Number 33, don't make the mistake of becoming good at something you hate.
If you don't like to do something, find ways to never do it for the rest of your life. Take all that time and energy and focus on what you can become great at.
What you admire in other people in this world is their mastery, their focus. Just like Elon Musk is arguably the best entrepreneur ever created.
He's not the guy you want to take dating advice from. He's been married 1700 times.
So he's decided to become great at something he loves and ignore the other stuff he's not good at. Number 34, use a bedtime alarm, not a wake up alarm.
Most people, it's not what time they wake up in the morning. That's the issue.
It's what time they go to bed. If you're going to bed at 11 or 12 or one in the morning, of course,'re probably sleeping in.
Most people hear that I get up at 4am and they're impressed, but they don't realize that I went to bed at 9. I've been sleeping for 7 hours.
Number 35, stay close to people who want more for you, not more from you. As you grow and expand and have more resources, trust me, more people are going to chirp and ask you for things.
Those people didn't even recognize or acknowledge you when you were just starting off, but now all of a sudden you've got something, they're gonna ask you for more. You wanna be around the people that are gonna celebrate you to push for more, not ask you for more.
Number 36, stop reading books and start studying them. Every morning when I'm reading, I'm looking for something to share with the world.
It's like my gift to the universe. I'm trying to find some insight, some quote that I feel could support other people.
That's me studying it. I'll incorporate that into training or coaching conversations.
Instead of just reading to get something done, I'm reading to integrate it into my being. Number 37, your new life will cost you your old one.
I would love to say that you're good enough today to achieve the thing you want, but the truth is that if you were, you'd already have it. So if you want that expansive new life, it's gonna cost you your old one.
The bad habits, the neglect, the negative self-talk, all that has to go to create the space for you to become more. Number 38, if you keep running into bad people, you might be the problem.
Did you ever notice that the people that are always running into weird situations, having these altercations, it's always the same people? I wonder if they realize that it's who they are that's causing those situations, not the people at the baseball game or after the club. They're always there.
If that's happened to you, you might be the problem. Number 39, it's never too late to change your life.
I don't care if you're 50, 75. If you have the desire to improve your situation, you can start today by a simple exercise of reflecting on the previous day and asking yourself, what's one decision you wish you would have made differently? And then make a commitment to make that decision differently.
If that's waking up earlier, eating better, going to the gym, you just start with one day because that's the beginning of an upward spiral. Number 40, if you're addicted to your phone, it just means your life isn't interesting enough.
If you're always defaulting to seeing what everybody else is up to instead of checking in with the things you're working on, go work on things that are more exciting. Go give yourself a bigger mountain to climb and make it tough.
It's on the back end of doing hard things that makes life exciting. Number 41, respect comes from admiration, not fear.
I used to make the mistake that if I showed up and people were scared of what I was about to say, then they would respect me. How silly is that? I don't want people around me because they're scared of me.
I want people around me because they admire me. A leader is only a leader if they have followers.
It's people that have decided because of your character that they wanna be around you that makes you somebody they admire. Number 42, if you wanna be extraordinary, you need to be extra.
If you're doing anything and there's a lot of people around you while you're doing it, climbing that mountain, doing that race, then you're not really being extra. So by definition of that last mile being very not crowded, that is how you know you're being extraordinary to get a life that will be extra.
Number 43, you can love somebody from a distance. I know that your family means a lot to you.
I know that you have friends that you've had for 20 plus years, but the truth is, is sometimes you have to create some space. It doesn't mean you don't love them.
It just means that for now, you need to go do your thing and not be distracted by their thing. So that's why we say you can love somebody from a distance.
So focus on you for the next little bit. Number 44, the freest person in the room is the person with no secrets.
See, everybody's walking around with mask on to try to protect themselves, their ego, their identity. It's the people that take off all of the mask and just show up authentically themselves.
They say what they think. They show up with a big heart.
They don't worry about being hurt. That person is the freest person in any room.
Number 45, comparison is the thief of joy. Everybody's talking about this person and that person, and they essentially live their life through this filter of everybody else compared to them.
I should be richer, I should be fitter. I should be smarter.
Here's my philosophy. The only person I'm comparing myself to is the Dan of yesterday, the person I used to be.
I can ask myself, am I better today than I was last week, last year? If the answer is yes, then I'm making progress. And that is the only thing that matters.
Everybody else is on their own journey, their own timeline. They're not me.
I didn't live their life. They didn't live mine.
So the moment that you start comparing
yourself to anybody else other than you is when you start taking the joy out of life.
If you want to learn how to build your dream life in 12 months, click the video and I'll see you on
the other side.