How Patrick Bet-David Went From Refugee Camp to a $1B Empire

Speaker 1 In Germany at the refugee camp, kid got shot. We're running around and hiding in a bathroom to make sure we don't get shot.

Speaker 2 What do you think that period of your life taught you that's been invaluable for you as an entrepreneur today?

Speaker 1 You're one decision away from ruining your life. One night I came home.
We were expecting our first. Jennifer's in tears.
It's 1.30 in the morning. She tells me she had a miscarriage.

Speaker 1 And I'm like, God, what are you doing? That anger, is it still there?

Speaker 1 Oh, my God.

Speaker 1 I've made a lot of stupid mistakes in my life, but as you're going,

Speaker 1 you're just hoping you don't make the same mistake twice.

Speaker 2 Bo, why should people be thinking billion?

Speaker 1 It's not a job for everybody. It's not.
So for me, why do I need to make a billion dollars?

Speaker 3 Welcome to the Martel Method. I went from rehab at 17 to building a $100 million empire and being a Wall Street Journal best-selling author.

Speaker 3 In this podcast, I'll show you exactly how to build a life and business you don't grow to hate. My best-selling book, Buy Back Your Time, is out now.

Speaker 3 Grab a copy at buybackyourtime.com or at any of your preferred online retailers.

Speaker 2 Welcome, everybody, to the show. I'm here with Patrick Bett David, PBD.
Patrick, my first question, I was just actually with Adam at the vault.

Speaker 1 In the vault, he was for you. I know.

Speaker 2 He's like, who are you?

Speaker 2 I recognized this. He looked at us with the logo.
I said, well, we do some content. But I asked him when I was leaving, I said, I'm about to go have a conversation with Patrick.

Speaker 2 What's a question I should ask that most people don't ask? And we were talking about some of the work I do at-risk youth. Yep.
And he goes, Patrick essentially is who you just described.

Speaker 2 If you don't mind, I know you've shared the story about, you know, coming from Iran and stuff, but like,

Speaker 2 you know, one, a guy asked me once, he said, what did your childhood smell like?

Speaker 1 And I thought that was an interesting way, you know, to, yeah, you know, Middle Eastern, they sweat a lot. What do you want me to tell you about what childhoods? No, but I would tell you, so for me,

Speaker 1 till 10 years old, mom and dad lived together. And my dad was always my my hero.
Since I was six years old, when the teacher asked me, who do you want to be when you grow up?

Speaker 1 I said, I want to be a dad one day because I just want to be like the guy. When they got a divorced Germany refugee camp, I experienced what it was to not trust everybody.

Speaker 1 And you can't think everybody wants what's best for you. And I got stabbed the first time with a fight with a couple of Afghani kids.

Speaker 1 And we were with Czech kids and Yugoslavia, Miodrag, and Ana Maria and Polish and all these guys. I'm like, okay, I'm by myself now.
It's me, my sister, who's six years older, and my mom.

Speaker 1 And then came to the States, lived in Glendale, and

Speaker 1 refugee, you know, welfare, all this other. We never had a car.
We would always go different places. My mother got a car at the tail end of it.
So I would always walk to school and back.

Speaker 1 And then you're around gangsters, you know, all these different guys that are in gangs, drug dealers, and all these guys. And I didn't touch drugs.

Speaker 1 I only, I never touched drugs because I was afraid of God. My mother, even though I didn't believe in God, she would always tell me one thing that very effective.

Speaker 1 She would say, say, I may not know what you're doing, but God knows if you use drugs. Okay, my best friend was the number one guy selling weed in Glendale.
He's no longer with us.

Speaker 1 I took him to rehab, and his drug that took him out was Vicodin, 50 a day.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I took him to Bible study. We took him to Tarzana Medical Center, Rehabilitation Center, and boom.

Speaker 1 Love that guy. Probably my favorite guy to just hang out and talk and enjoy, just a real guy.
We liked, you know, he was a Tupac guy. Anyway, so that's that part.
So

Speaker 1 at 14 years old, my dad's trying to kind of change my life and he introduced me to this guy named Vladimir, who's now a pastor in Torlock, a Syrian guy, whose father was like my guy who I wanted to be like.

Speaker 1 I wanted to be an entrepreneur, Luter Al-Khase,

Speaker 1 who had a house in

Speaker 1 Upland, California, San Antonio Boulevard, right next to Snoop Dogg. And I would go to this guy's house, 7,200 square feet.
I'm like, what a freaking house.

Speaker 1 One day, I went, he was a pictures of his family in white pool table, pictured with Al Gore, liberal guy. I'm like, okay, so office, your bedroom had a jacuzzi, big pool, basketball.

Speaker 1 Like, I don't understand any of this stuff, man. I want a life like this.
He would sit there with his kids, always push them. Jesus wasn't real, even though he believed it.

Speaker 1 Let me tell you, money is bad. And like, what are you talking about? You do good with money.
And it was always heated debates with his kids. And I loved it.

Speaker 1 His son brought me to a league called the New Century Century City Basketball Association in Echo Park. It's guys from Blood, Crypt,

Speaker 1 MS-13,

Speaker 1 Black Diamonds, I believe, all these guys. We were all just, you know, hoodlum kids.
One time there was a shooting. My dad was there.

Speaker 1 Kid got shot. We're running around and hiding in a bathroom to make sure we don't get shot.
So then after high school, I'm like, dude, nothing's going to happen. I'm working at Burger Kinston.

Speaker 1 Like, I got a straight path to doing something big. I said, I'm going to go to 20 years in the military.
And military is when I flipped.

Speaker 1 Drill drill sergeant green got a hold of me and there's a famous picture with me standing like this next to my drill sergeant and my dad and uh after that i'm like yeah i can't live life this like this anymore and then boom 180.

Speaker 3 what do you think that period of your life taught you that's been invaluable for you as an entrepreneur today before we get back to the episode if you want to jumpstart your week with my top stories and tactics be sure to subscribe to the martel method newsletter it's where you'll elevate your mindset fitness and business in less than five minutes a week.

Speaker 3 Find it at MartelMethod.com.

Speaker 1 You're one decision away from ruining your life.

Speaker 1 We're watching a movie the other day. The kids and I, we were watching Ray Allen's movie with Denzel, the basketball game.
What is the Ray Allen movie with the

Speaker 1 You Got Game? Is it You Got Game or He Got Game? Something like one of those things, You Got Game.

Speaker 1 And the back and forth on how the father ended up in jail and the governor comes in, wants him to recruit his son to go to the local school. And if you do, I will reduce your sentence.

Speaker 1 And some guys are following him and we're just sitting there. We're like, look at this guy.
So he's dating this girl that, you know, he's hooking up with all the time.

Speaker 1 And she's trying to get paid to get him to a certain school.

Speaker 1 And one by one by one, you're realizing that some of the people don't want what's best for you and some of the people, all the motives of certain relationship, right?

Speaker 1 And there's nothing wrong with people having a motive motive with you. Your wife has a motive with you.
You have a motive with your wife. Your kids do with you.
You with them. There's motive here.

Speaker 1 There's motives that are selfish for him versus you versus me. This here, there's motive, both sides.
But you have to know: is the motive coming from a negative place?

Speaker 1 Is it coming from a positive place? You just did an event with John Maxwell.

Speaker 1 One of the best quotes I heard John Maxwell once say: he says, when you learn to persuade, be very careful to not flirt with using that ability to manipulate.

Speaker 1 Because when you learn how to persuade, you can also manipulate, right? Because manipulation is what? Me win, you lose. And so that's the motive where you got to learn with all the other guys.

Speaker 1 And I was blindside. I'm like, oh, that guy wants what's best for me.
You don't want what's best for me. No, this guy doesn't.

Speaker 1 I'm like, yeah, this is lopsided. I got to figure this stuff out with human nature and motives and all this stuff.
And that took many years to figure out.

Speaker 1 But that was probably the case because it was so chaotic. It's like, ah, so much going on.
I'm like, yeah, no,

Speaker 1 I'm good. I got it.
So a lot of the chaos between my mom, my dad, refugee camp, you know, Glendale, all this stuff is why in business, you can kind of be like, no, it's going to be fine.

Speaker 1 We're going to be good. We got this.
You don't get trained that later on in life. Musk handles chaos well.
Why? Because his upbringing was way more chaotic than what he's going through today.

Speaker 1 So today for him is a very safe place to be. So that's probably what it taught me at that time.

Speaker 2 What was the scariest moment as a child for you?

Speaker 1 Oh, no longer seeing the footsteps of my dad coming upstairs. So

Speaker 1 we lived in Iran and we lived on the fourth floor, Khyabanahojat. And my favorite part of the day was he would come home around 8.20, 8.30, and I would see his head go like this.

Speaker 1 And there was a glass door that we had. Glass was like this.
And it was blurry. You couldn't see it through.
But when he would come up, I would see a head go like this. It was the best part of my day.

Speaker 1 That means dad's home.

Speaker 1 And he would open up. We'd run up, wrestle, hang out, and have 15 minutes with him because he always wanted us to go to sleep at 8.30.
Boom, you got to go to sleep. But

Speaker 1 the last time I saw that head coming up stairs, I was

Speaker 1 10 years and some eight months old, nine months old. That's probably the scariest part because that's the last time I saw it.

Speaker 1 I was afraid of no longer having that man in my life and who am I going to learn from being a man. So in Germany at the refugee camp, I didn't have any men around me.
It was just my mom and my sister.

Speaker 1 And I got a, so I had to age very quickly to protect my sister and my mom.

Speaker 1 And then when I came here, I saw my dad

Speaker 1 two days a month for six years.

Speaker 1 And then I joined the army. And then when I got out of the army, I'm like, listen, if I'm going to be roommates with anybody, at 21 years old, my dad and I became roommates.
That's crazy.

Speaker 1 So we made up for all the years we didn't live together as a kid. I lived with them from 21 to 28.

Speaker 1 You know, my dad was my roommate from 21 to 28 years. Most people don't know this.
I do not know that. My dad and I were roommates from 21 to 28.

Speaker 2 What is it about your dad that you

Speaker 2 admire, emulate today?

Speaker 2 Yes,

Speaker 2 why did you love him so much?

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 1 you asked me a question when I'm interviewing and I ask sometimes tough questions of people or I'm, you know, challenging or whatever.

Speaker 1 To me, when I ask it,

Speaker 1 I don't think I'm being a bad guy. And I don't think I'm trying

Speaker 1 to,

Speaker 1 you know, disrespect the person. It's very natural to me.
Why? Because that's how he was.

Speaker 1 So he had a

Speaker 1 very

Speaker 1 interesting way of unbelievable unconditional love, but but straight up accountability.

Speaker 1 And it's like as a boy growing up,

Speaker 1 holy moly, you need that. Like if a boy has unconditional love, but also you're getting your ass handed to you, never physically, it was always like you're making excuses.
Why are you being so lazy?

Speaker 1 Why this? And da-da-da-da-da. And then it's like this, right? So, like, dude, this guy, one of the most annoying things he set the example of as a father,

Speaker 1 If he told you he was going to do something, take it to the bank.

Speaker 1 I'm 45 years old. I'm going to be 46 in two months.
Till today, when I tell you this, I'm not being sarcastic. My dad has never once told me he's going to do something that he's never done.

Speaker 1 Tell me, that's not weird. That's crazy.
It's annoying. Honestly, even more than crazy, it's annoying because I got four kids now.

Speaker 1 So I can't have the kids see this because kids, if you see this, I'm joking. It's a joke.
So don't hold that same accountability to your dad.

Speaker 1 But a part of it is that standard gets with you and either you hate it and you say, I don't want to live by that standards and I'm going to make sure my kids get everything so easy and they don't have to earn everything,

Speaker 1 or you're going to be like, it works. I'm going to pass it down.

Speaker 1 That's the part about this guy that this man that today, now he lives with us, is downstairs. He's been with me now, living in our house for three years.
And my kids are super close to him.

Speaker 1 My Brooklyn, Tico, Dylan,

Speaker 1 he takes my oldest to kickboxing every night. He used to take them to jujitsu for two years.
Now he wants to do kickboxing. He's involved, 82 years old, still drives on his own and happy as can be.

Speaker 1 But yeah, he very influential in my life.

Speaker 2 You tell a story often about how your dad was in the hospital and they weren't treating him right. And that was a moment.

Speaker 2 That anger, because I used to, as a kid, I used to get in these moments where I felt slighted and it was just like I saw red.

Speaker 2 Did that propel you to then build? And then did you have to figure out how to work through those emotions? Because obviously you can't show up like that. And like, have you worked through that?

Speaker 1 Is it still there? Do you use it for good?

Speaker 1 God,

Speaker 2 I just know my story.

Speaker 1 My journey is curious. You told me your story.
It was unbelievable. Yeah.
But

Speaker 1 yeah, you know what it's like.

Speaker 1 Craziest analogy here for you, whether this makes sense or not. What button does a president have access to?

Speaker 1 The nuclear button. What happens if he presses that button? What can he do to the world? Mayhem, chaos,

Speaker 1 destruction, World War III.

Speaker 1 Why has no president ever pressed it?

Speaker 1 So the thing with anger is some of us have more, some of us have less, but we all have it, right?

Speaker 1 You can use that button, but whenever you use the button, you better be ready for what comes with it as well.

Speaker 1 Chaos, if a president does that, you indirectly lose trust with other countries that are allies.

Speaker 1 You cause division between other countries. Your own people who believe in you are no longer going to trust you with the button.
You ain't getting reelected.

Speaker 1 Your family will question some of your decisions that you made. It may kill some of your family members if you press that button because the backfire coming back to you.

Speaker 1 So those are the things as a kid you don't think about. As you get older, you think a little bit more before you press that anger button.
Okay.

Speaker 1 We all sometimes, maybe not an anger button, maybe it's just kind of like a small little thing that you do that's, you know, temperament goes up and down.

Speaker 1 It's not like we're going to stay here for the rest of our lives. There's going to be some interesting moments.
But the more you look at the, you know,

Speaker 1 reasons why we get angry, you know, I'm either having a conversation with somebody and we have a debate. All of a sudden I'm cornered with an issue.
Well, you're an idiot. Why'd you call him an idiot?

Speaker 1 Because you don't have a rebuttal. Oh, so your lack of knowledge led to being afraid of not having a rebuttal to look like an idiot.
So the immediate reaction was anger, and that anger led to danger.

Speaker 1 You just lost a relationship. You look like a clown.

Speaker 1 Got it.

Speaker 1 So guess what?

Speaker 1 Let me do some research. Can we verify what you just said? Okay, you sure about what you're saying? Let me go do some research and get back to you.

Speaker 1 I got to go get better on this topic because I don't have enough intel yet. So then when we ask why do we get angry,

Speaker 1 you're not controlling the situation. You're cornered because you don't have the information.
You're getting caught lying.

Speaker 1 They're identifying a move that you have that maybe they're exposing and your anger reveals that they're right instead of staying calm.

Speaker 1 The more situations like this you're in, hopefully eventually become more aware that

Speaker 1 this is what typically happens for you when you get angry. Now, anger is a God-given, you know, he gave, you gave, why'd you give it to us? What's the, why'd you give it to me?

Speaker 1 If it's so bad, why'd you give it to me? Right?

Speaker 1 There's a

Speaker 1 took my kids to go watch this movie Deadpool. I don't know if you've seen Deadpool and Wolverine.

Speaker 2 People can't stop talking about it.

Speaker 1 I got to go. 12 years old.

Speaker 1 So I said, let me take. So my kids, son finally convinced me to take him.
So we go there and there's this scene. Ryan Reynolds, Frick, we're talking about what a stud of a guy.

Speaker 1 There's a scene. By the way, you know his wife's in the movie as well.
Oh, I didn't know she was in it. Yeah, so the other good-looking guy, good-looking Deadpool that shows up is apparently his wife.

Speaker 1 And Jennifer Lawrence was in the movie, and apparently, Matthew, by the way, ridiculous. They spent 200 million.
I think it's at 1.1 billion right right now, give or take.

Speaker 1 There's a scene in the movie that he says, look, the human body has 206 different bones. And if I'm watching such and such show, I officially have 207 bones.

Speaker 1 And my 10-year-old son looks at me, says, Dad, do I have that 207 bone?

Speaker 1 And then Tico says, Dad, I got that joke. That's hilarious.
He's 12. And Tico's Dylan says, which bone is that? You've known about two years.
And I'm sitting there laughing my ass up.

Speaker 1 What a hilarious situation here, right?

Speaker 1 But what's funny is when these guys were six and four years old, one day we're in the shower. I'm like, hey, whose is that?

Speaker 1 Whose is that?

Speaker 1 Whose is this?

Speaker 1 I said, this is mine. That's yours.
That's yours.

Speaker 1 God gave it to you for you to play with it. Okay? Nobody else plays with it because you're teaching them like infant school.

Speaker 1 They're doing some stuff one day maybe a girl will play with it till then you get to only play with it does that make sense and and jennifer runs out she's like this is too uncomfortable i said okay now i play with mine and you know one day you're gonna find out who else plays with that because you guys are here who i'll tell you later that's a different story i said for however for and so we're kind of going through this process Where am I going with this?

Speaker 1 This is a weapon as well.

Speaker 1 I can do good with it.

Speaker 1 I can do bad with it yeah you can ruin it anger god gave me this you got one i got one god gave us this why'd he give it to us it's a weapon it can do good bad it can do a lot if used properly it's it's for pleasure it's for procreation it's for a lot of different things but it can also ruin a lot of different things right

Speaker 1 anger same thing so As you're going through life, man, and by the way, I'm not a guy that walks on water. God knows, I've made a lot of stupid mistakes in my life, but as you're going,

Speaker 1 you're just hoping you don't make the same mistake twice. When my guys and the companies I run or operate or my kids make a new mistake, I'm like, okay, listen, this is a pretty bad mistake.

Speaker 1 This is a royal F up. We just lost a lot of money.
That's your first time doing it. Second time you do it, you're fired, but this is the first time you're going to be fine.
Same with kids.

Speaker 1 But we have to sometimes hold ourselves to that standard as well.

Speaker 2 And over the years, I know I used to use my anger.

Speaker 2 to try to get change in my life, but it created emotional shrapnel. And I know you talked once about having people on your team.
There's different types of people. And you talk about drivers.

Speaker 2 And some people might be good at one thing, but you want a guy that can go into a room, defuse a situation, but also agitate sometimes.

Speaker 2 Like, is that kind of how you think of the emotional side when it comes to leadership? Like, talk about what a drive, because you have a unique perspective that I'd love the audience to understand.

Speaker 2 Cause some people think, well, I got to be calm all the time.

Speaker 1 No. No, I'll give you a perfect analogy.
And I hope none of my guys see this video. Oh, let's go.

Speaker 1 But if the the few of them that will see me, they're going to text me and they're going to say, you mother, you know, what about I'm like, I get it. I have a role to play.

Speaker 3 Before we get back to this episode, if you prefer to watch your content, then go find me on YouTube. I have this episode on YouTube.
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Now let's get back to the episode.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 1 you you walk into a negotiation. You're sitting with a team.
Think the movie Air.

Speaker 1 Air, Sonny Vaccario, Phil Knight, they're trying to negotiate to get Michael Jordan to not go to Converse or is it Puma? It's Converse and Adidas. And instead sign with Nike.

Speaker 1 They have a meeting to prepare for the negotiation, okay?

Speaker 1 The shoe designer is there. Sonny Vaccario is there.
Phil Knight is there. The team is there.

Speaker 1 They invite Michael to come to the headquarters luckily because he goes visits them Michael Michael's mother and father all show up they're sitting at the table first guy gets up is saying

Speaker 1 they say Phil you have to show up late I'm not showing up late I'm the CO Nike if you show up on time it means that you don't have a lot of business if you show up late that means you have a lot of business show up two minutes late okay

Speaker 1 so he shows up two minutes late says i'm so sorry i got all these other business meeting meetings I'm doing. I'm so sorry about being late.
Oh, it's totally fine. Great to meet you.
Now totally fine.

Speaker 1 We're just having a record break in here. It's so great to meet you guys.
Lou, you have to see the scene, right? Have you seen a movie? No, I've seen it, but I don't remember. You got to see it.

Speaker 1 So then they say, you're going to show the video. And this guy's showing this video.
In a minute, two minutes, the video goes, it's the worst video ever made to recruit Michael.

Speaker 1 So finally, the whole thing is falling apart. Sonny says, stop the video, stop the video.
He looks at Michael. He says, Michael, I just got to tell you,

Speaker 1 look,

Speaker 1 at the end of the day, if you go to Con versus This,

Speaker 1 if you go to Adidas is this, this entire thing is about you. Here's what we believe you can be.

Speaker 1 I believe you're the greatest player in the world, and I believe you're going to be the greatest player this game's ever seen. He says, but All the MVPs are going to win.

Speaker 1 All the all-stars are going to win. All the all-star MVPs are going to win.
All the championships are going to win. You're going to fall.

Speaker 1 And when you fall and all the people are going to come after you, the critics, we're going to be there in your corner because we know what.

Speaker 1 I mean, I've watched this scene. I'm like,

Speaker 1 I had to, first week the movie comes out, I watch it three times. I took all our leadership team here, employees here.
We went and run it out the theater.

Speaker 1 We watched it together, rented out a theater, and I took 300 of my guys and my insurance company. And the first week the movie came out, we did that with the movie.

Speaker 1 There's only a couple movies I've done that with. This was one of them.
The other one I did it with was Ford versus Ferrari.

Speaker 1 So I'm like, look at this scene, how prepared they are when they go into this meeting. So let me give you the whole stage here.
I'm in Vegas last week. I'm at this insurance conference.

Speaker 1 Could very likely be my last one ever. I'm the founder.
I love these guys.

Speaker 1 Absolutely love these guys. Now,

Speaker 1 We go in the first meeting. I call a meeting for all my runners who know who they are.
Without them, we would have never built this company. Every one of them knows who they are.
They're in the room.

Speaker 1 And I go through a list of mistakes they can make and potential things to look for in the future. And I poke them

Speaker 1 in the most logical way possible. And I straight up told them, here's the mistakes you're going to make.
You all need to know this. If you do, this is the results.
Period.

Speaker 1 Gave them each a deal toy. A deal toy when you sell a company with a group.
You know what a deal toys. You've done many.

Speaker 1 So I give them each a deal toy. The room is emotional.
We're crying, talking. Great moment.

Speaker 1 My role is to make sure the new buyers are being handed over a business that's going to continue and they're not going to quit because I'm the founder.

Speaker 1 Founder always wants their business to grow because you can say I was the founder that helped XYZ, right?

Speaker 1 Now, I'm also aware when a founder leaves, The people that are in the company, there are three different camps.

Speaker 1 There are those who secretly can't wait for you to leave because they're sick and tired of your bullshit and driving and agitating and disturbing and getting them to be like this guy never stops i'm so sick and tired of this bullshit and vision and all knock it off right there's the guys in the middle that are kind of like

Speaker 1 you know will um

Speaker 1 be like yeah i'm gonna get to work no matter what and the guys that are always gonna be grateful for you but there's guys that also when you leave they're gonna be like now that i'm no longer making money with you i don't need you anymore i to be here.

Speaker 1 I don't care what my relation with you is gonna be, I'm gonna go here. So they revealed themselves that

Speaker 1 it was all about money with you anyways, the relationship I had. A founder can't be emotional and offended by that.
Some people are going to do that.

Speaker 1 But a founder's affinity is going to be with certain people that long-term are going to always say, we would have never gotten to where we got to without this guy.

Speaker 1 That relationship is 40, 50 years, right? So then it goes award ceremony. At award ceremony, these guys, we had a great lineup.
Ludacris opens it up with a concert.

Speaker 1 He just posted it on his Instagram saying, I've never been to a concert at a corporate event that was this wild, this energetic, never. You should see.
Ludacris couldn't believe it.

Speaker 1 He says, thank you. He couldn't stop thanking us for the event that we had together.

Speaker 1 When you see his Instagram post, if he goes on it right now and looks at it, room packed, standing up, singing to Are you go and singing to all these weird songs, right?

Speaker 1 Then Bill Belichick hits the stage. Great conversation with Bill backstage.
He goes up there. Then you got a couple other guys that are at the event.
Then it's my turn to come up.

Speaker 1 So I tell all the guys when my turn comes up, this can't be about me. I'm not sitting here being like, oh, sentimental crying.
Nope. This has to be about, hey, matchmaker.
You're now married.

Speaker 1 You guys got to find a way to work together. And you're edifying both.
And you're challenging the people that the new buyer cannot challenge right now.

Speaker 1 Because I can be the bad cop, they need to be the good cop because they're going to be doing business together.

Speaker 1 So I go on a 30-minute message calling out every single biggest ego in the room that needs to be called

Speaker 1 in front of nearly 10,000 people in the room, recorded.

Speaker 1 It's like by name. By name, looking at them one by one, by one by one by one, calling out all their names.
I leave record-breaking amount of registration to their next event.

Speaker 1 12,000 tickets sold for an event that's nearly a year from now, seven months from now.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 1 they've come out of the event, record-breaking way of leaving an event. Guess what? Here you go.

Speaker 1 You know, it's like your daughter got married to a man. You can't try to be the man for your daughter or else she's going to leave her husband to come to you.
This is your new husband.

Speaker 1 Go make it work. I'm always here.
As long as you respect me, I'm always here. I love you.
I respect you. Go.
So very

Speaker 1 interesting question you asked, that sometimes, you know, we're so concerned about us being the hero all the time that we're afraid to make the tough calls of agitating and pushing that we need to be doing.

Speaker 1 And that's because we're too much about, I have to be liked by everybody. And I'm a leader amongst leaders.
And leaders amongst leaders. make different types of decision.

Speaker 1 That's not a popularity contest.

Speaker 2 But it's interesting because I've seen you do that, the pushing, and then you have this beautiful way that I don't, I don't do it as well as I should of asking people's opinion.

Speaker 2 You do it on your podcast like controversial. I'm like, I know what Patrick's thinking, but you don't say it first.
You're like, what do you think? Adam, what do you think?

Speaker 2 And it's just, it's really cool to see because you build that consensus and then you, and, but it allows everybody to feel heard and seen.

Speaker 2 So it's, that's why I say like some drivers being one-dimensional is just not, I'm talking the people that can produce the 10 million, 100 million in your organization, like real leaders they have to have those other skills that you talked about why a billion dollars we just had a conversation you kind of challenged me a little bit a lot um which I love

Speaker 1 but am I right a hundred percent you're right we have a by the way we have a I can't tell you what five years five year is beautiful but why should people be thinking billion because like people right now it seems like it started at the 10k like but why a billion they don't have to be thinking billion uh and so here's here's how life works.

Speaker 1 Okay. And I had to learn this the hard way.

Speaker 3 Before we get back to the episode, if you actually want to know what my real life looks like and see the people and the businesses and the companies I buy and my family and just like how I make it all work, go follow me on Instagram, Dan Martell, to Elza Martel on Instagram.

Speaker 3 It's where I show the behind the scenes, the real deal, real time. I'd love to see you there.

Speaker 1 Have an amazing day.

Speaker 1 You know, when I was coming up and at 27, 28 years old, my wife would tell you, that's when we started dating first. I was 28.

Speaker 1 I'd known her for five and a half years, but we were always in different relationships. The only time we were single for a two-week period was the time when I asked her out.

Speaker 1 And that's when we were together for a year and a half and then we got married. But in 2007, 2008, it's a very weird year for me.

Speaker 1 My talk about temper, my temper was out of control because I was trying to figure out what I'm going to do in in the next 20, 30, 40 years.

Speaker 1 So I had a meeting with my pastor, with one of my advisors, with a handful of guys in business I respect a lot. And I flew him in and we had a meeting at the office.
And I said, so

Speaker 1 what should be my next move? I've learned how to make money. I'm in financial services.
I'm going to make a lot of money in this business.

Speaker 1 And I'm very good at what I do, but It can't be just for money. It's not going to drive me.
So

Speaker 1 I said, Pastor Dudley, you think I'm supposed to be a pastor?

Speaker 1 He says, No, I don't think you're meant to be a pastor. He said, I think you can make a bigger impact in business than wanting to be a pastor.
I said, Okay, great. Boom.
Off the list.

Speaker 1 What do you think I'm supposed to be doing? What do you think I'm supposed to be doing? You think I'm supposed to go into politics? You think I'm supposed to go?

Speaker 1 What do you think I'm supposed to be doing? And I'm kind of like at that phase that I know I'm going to go till 80, 90 years old. I just have to make sure I know my next move is crystal clear.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 1 I leave, I go, I have dinner with George Will at Miramar Hotel Santa Monica, March of 2009. He's speaking, Pat Boone is at the event, all these guys are at the event.

Speaker 1 George Will gets up, talks about how lawyers are ruining America.

Speaker 1 And then right afterwards, a man named Bill Vogel introduced me to George Will and says, George, Patrick wants to find out what his next cause is for his life.

Speaker 1 You know, what do you think he should focus on? And he says, so tell me about your background. Where are you from? Iran.
Tell me about your parents.

Speaker 1 Tell me what, why don't you study capitalism, find out why so many people come to America? Why does America have 40 million immigrants coming here and not other countries?

Speaker 1 Why is there only the American dream? Why is there no Russian dream? Why is there no China? Look, all right. So I leave.

Speaker 1 The next day, I'm giving a sales meeting at Northridge off of Balboa Boulevard in my office, 8550 North Balboa Boulevard. I get up, I'm giving a talk.

Speaker 1 Everyone's looking at me saying, the hell is wrong with this guy? Like, we're in the insurance office. Why are you talking like you're running for office? That's March.

Speaker 1 Three months later, I get married, June 26th of 09.

Speaker 1 July 15th, I put an event together at J.W. Marriott Palm Desert, Saving America, Doing the Impossible, Steve Ends in name.
And I'm dressed as George Washington. My wife is dressed as Lady Liberty.

Speaker 1 This picture is all over online. 40-foot Mount Rushmore, 40 American flags.
Ronald Reagan's son is speaking. Larry Greenfield from Claremont Institute is speaking.

Speaker 1 And Dudley Rutherford is speaking about the same pastor that told me not to be a pastor. He's speaking and he's talking about the Star-Spangled Banner.
I come out.

Speaker 1 Three months later, we start the company. The company's crusade is called Saving America by bringing bringing back the free enterprise system and hope to American families.

Speaker 1 We go from 66 agents to 50,000 agents nationwide, 300 offices. We sold the company a couple years ago.
So, okay,

Speaker 1 why do I need to make a billion dollars?

Speaker 1 For us to build that company,

Speaker 1 it doesn't happen without my wife. I told her this the other day, first time I told her this, because, you know,

Speaker 1 I wanted to mean a lot. And she broke down crying.
I said, me and Tom, we're backstage and I'm telling these guys to their faces, I say, hey, guys, we built an incredible company.

Speaker 1 Look at the amount of people's lives we've changed. This is a very special company.
Look at all their faces. Look at their kids.
We're looking at all their kids. The smiles, the kids are so happy.

Speaker 1 It's so awesome. Seeing Rodolfo with his kids backstage.
You know, seeing all these guys, just awesome when I see these guys, right? Seeing Jose.

Speaker 1 just choked up when I'm looking at Jose and my Hector's, Erica, and all these guys.

Speaker 1 I'm I'm watching these guys. I'm like, look at what we built.
This is awesome.

Speaker 1 I said, well, I gotta tell you guys, I said, who do you think are the top five most important people that helped me do what we did here? And Jennifer says, field or home office? I said,

Speaker 1 doesn't matter, field or home office.

Speaker 1 So they start giving names. I said, no, said no.
I said, let me tell you, number one, who's number one?

Speaker 1 I said, you.

Speaker 1 I've never told her this.

Speaker 1 Oh, man, this should have been recorded. So Jen is like, wow, my, she's like, it's, you know, breaking down.

Speaker 1 I said, babe, you were freaking doing payroll a day after our first son was born in hospital while you're in the freaking bed.

Speaker 1 Second kid is born. You're at the office the next day.

Speaker 1 He's on the floor. You're at the office.
You've always had an office right next to me for 15 years. The only year you've never worked is when our fourth baby, Brooklyn, was born.

Speaker 1 You asked if you can stay home for a year. And now today her office is right right next to my office.

Speaker 1 I said, we've moved 12 times in a house, 13 times in an office, and we have four kids born in three states.

Speaker 1 Both states we moved to, Texas and Florida, were five months pregnant every single time we moved. Yeah, we wouldn't be able to do this without you, okay?

Speaker 1 I told Tom, you helped me raise the first million dollars. You helped me raise the second $10 million.
I don't know how to raise money.

Speaker 1 I said, you played such an important role for bringing a million and a $10 million in. What if you don't? The sales process, you closed the deal when we went through it.
I gave you the MVP.

Speaker 1 I gave you that Rolex watch. I gave you that Iron Center in front of everybody to tell you without you, that deal doesn't close.
Wilder, we're in Monaco. You're going on four hours of sleep in a week.

Speaker 1 You did that. And Tom's emotional.
And then I'm going through the sales process with the Sappalas that Sheena Matt Sopala, what Rodolph Mbargas did, Palayo being the first, Kaitan being a cruise.

Speaker 1 All these guys you go through, but it's the role you've been chosen to play.

Speaker 1 The billion is purely if there is a cause behind it where you are the guy that has to have the highest level of pressure. It's not a job for everybody.
It's not.

Speaker 1 There's a lot of people that would love to have that. That's simply not your part to have.
Paul George one time said the most craziest thing I talked about on the podcast today.

Speaker 1 Paul George, he's made a few hundred million dollars in the NBA

Speaker 1 and MVP, you know, candidate every year and broke his leg when he was going for a dunk when he's playing for the Indiana Pacers. I say he'll never make a comeback.

Speaker 1 Came back, killed it, became another MVP candidate. He said this two years ago on his podcast with Dallas Rutherford.
He says, you know what I learned? What's that?

Speaker 1 I'm never going to win a championship being the number one.

Speaker 1 Who says that? AI never won as a one. Westbrook never won as a one.

Speaker 1 You know how many names? Carmel Anthony never won as a one.

Speaker 1 Even Kevin Durant never won as a one. It was still Steph Cream when he was was at the Golden State Warriors.

Speaker 1 Kyrie's never won as a one. We can go.
Jimmy Butthra, as amazing as he is, he's never won as a one.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 1 it's so hard for somebody to finally sit there and say, dude, you're not a one.

Speaker 1 You're going to keep trying to be a number one. You're not a one.
You're a great two.

Speaker 1 At a two, you're a nine. When you play a two, you're a nine.
When you're a one, you play three. Yeah.
So you only bring out the three in you. You do so well when you're a two or a six or an eight.

Speaker 1 So, and trust me, sometimes being a one is kind of like, I don't want to be a one. I never wanted to start an insurance company, never.

Speaker 1 The only reason I did is because three people offended me in the former company. I wanted to be the CEO of that company.
I don't want to be a founder. I had a great life.

Speaker 1 I didn't need to deal with lawyers and lawsuits and losing carriers and business and six months of travel every year. I could have leveraged other people traveling to my offices all the time.

Speaker 1 Now I have to do this six months away from my wife and my kids. I don't want to do any of this stuff.
I want to. So I didn't want to be a founder.
I was forced to be a founder.

Speaker 1 Now that I am, I take the responsibility very seriously. So for me, the conversation of the billion isn't because my life is going to change dramatically.

Speaker 1 Everything I want to buy and have, I pretty much have. My dream wasn't to have a jet or have a million dollar car or live in a, you know, $30 million house.
I live in a $40 million house. I have a...

Speaker 1 Great life right now. Everything is within a three-mile radius.
We bought this place, had no clue. This place was empty for how long? A year? Nothing.
We just bought it.

Speaker 1 We're like, we don't even know what we're going to do with this. One day day i'm like um let's turn this into a club let's put two bars here let's build a cigar lounge in the back let's build a vip

Speaker 1 yeah let's do this and let's have a production team back yeah let's see what happens here rfk's done a town hall here vivek's done a town hall here uh dennis quaid was here last week was that a wiener interview here Yeah, Anthony Wiener was here.

Speaker 1 Giuliani's been here. Dave Smith and Chris Cuomo debate was here.
Candace Owens and Chris Cuomo was here. You know how many stuff we've done here? We've done so many different things.

Speaker 1 But so now, are you going to fully go for vision or was it really all about money? If I slow down now, internally to myself, it was really all about money. It wasn't about vision.
I can't do that. No.

Speaker 2 As last question, I want to land the plane. I was just with John Maxwell.
You brought his name up, and we were sitting down and we were talking about our faith.

Speaker 2 And he has friendships with people from different backgrounds. And he was talking about an atheist friend of his.
And he said to her, He says, You know, I know you don't believe in God,

Speaker 2 but I bet you sure do miss him.

Speaker 2 And it got me.

Speaker 2 What does God mean to you?

Speaker 1 Yeah,

Speaker 1 well, I mean,

Speaker 1 highest level of my confidence where I'm at

Speaker 1 to

Speaker 1 so you know, visionaries are like, Oh, here's what we're going to be doing. Okay,

Speaker 1 maybe

Speaker 1 where you want to go

Speaker 1 is

Speaker 1 clear, right?

Speaker 1 But

Speaker 1 you've never been there before, right?

Speaker 1 You never know what challenges you're going to face, what new enemies are going to come after you. And the bigger the vision gets, the enemies get more formidable.
The enemies get stronger.

Speaker 1 The enemies have better phone calls to make to ruin your life. The enemies have better publications to call to write a hit piece on you.

Speaker 1 The enemies know better executives at bigger companies to make algorithms, you know, the enemies get more powerful. Political enemies, financial enemies, regulation enemies, a lot of weird enemies.

Speaker 1 So how are you going to overcome those enemies?

Speaker 1 What am I going to say? I'm going to rely on people I know? No.

Speaker 1 I'm only going to rely on the man upstairs, period.

Speaker 1 Every time I hit a wall that I didn't know how was going to get solved next, Because I was loyal to the cause and I was loyal to him, he somehow, someway introduced me to the right person, who introduced me me to the right person, who introduced me to the right person, and things just happen.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 1 one night I came home. We were expecting our first.
Jennifer's in tears. It's 1.30 in the morning.
She tells me she had a miscarriage and she's all emotional in the room.

Speaker 1 I'm like, oh my God, I'm down to my last $13,000. We're living at the summit in Woodland Hills, Marriott.
I go out.

Speaker 1 I walk around. I'm listening to my 80s playlist, Foreigner.
I want to know what love is. It's a weird song to listen to, but I love that song.
And I'm like, God, what are you doing?

Speaker 1 If you don't like what I'm doing, make this whole thing bankrupt. If you don't want this thing to work, take it away.
I'll go get a job and work at Bally's. I don't care.

Speaker 1 If you think this is that bad, and I'm working 80 hours a week to make this, if you honestly think this is that bad, please, I'll stop right now. Make it go bankrupt.

Speaker 1 I'm still going to work 80 hours every single week, but if you don't think this is going to happen, don't put the right people in my life, don't have a miracle, don't do nothing I'm okay with that because you don't think this is a worthy company to build but I'm convinced it is

Speaker 1 because I think the values and principles we're teaching what we're doing with families what we're doing with bringing husband and wife to build a business together in an industry that's not focused on women that's not focused on teaching the right values we are encouraging people to go to take all these people to church we baptize nearly 3 000 people at this local church here over a 20 year span i'm like i i i think we're doing the right thing but you tell me what do you want me to do What do you want me to do?

Speaker 1 And it's like a father and son having a, you know, private,

Speaker 1 you know, argument. And I walk away.
Like, God, I don't know. I'm still going to go up to work early in the morning.

Speaker 1 I'm going to do my best, but you tell me, next week, it's like a 50 or 100,000 bonus check we got from AIG. I'm like,

Speaker 1 oh, we need a dab.

Speaker 1 And then, boom.

Speaker 1 Oh, we needed that contract.

Speaker 1 Oh, that is so pay.

Speaker 1 So it was like, the weirdest miracles would keep happening that I had.

Speaker 1 And then the confidence came about as long as I'm being aligned and the purpose is the right purpose, he's got my back. And that's where the fear of the Lord comes in.

Speaker 1 So my confidence comes from having that fear in him.

Speaker 2 It's beautiful.

Speaker 1 I can't describe it to you. PBD, appreciate the time.
Really enjoyed it. That was amazing.
Really enjoyed it. Thank you.
Yes.

Speaker 2 Everybody, follow this stuff.

Speaker 3 Thanks for listening to the Martel Method. If you like this episode, could you do me a huge favor and go leave a review?

Speaker 3 This helps us get the podcast more ears and helps more people get unstuck, reclaim their freedom, and build their empire.