Bonus Episode 43 PREVIEW: Communist Cars

The next slide is my special interest.

Go for it.

Go off.

This is this is okay.

So again, this is kind of a this one is it is a communist car in the sense that like it was they started in a company that wasn't communist to begin with.

And then, you know, World War II happened and things changed.

Uh, this is a Tatra.

Uh, it is the third oldest car company in existence.

Um, and it is genuinely communist in the way that uh these their cars that they built absolutely fucking love to kill Nazis.

It's probably the thing they are most famous for.

The headlines just turned blood red.

Yeah, it was infamously good at killing Nazis.

This is one of the first streamlined cars ever built.

So this is, this is a Tatra 77 right here.

It came out in 1934.

So the Chrysler Airflow came out around the same time.

You know, it's, it was, people were starting to think about the possibility of aerodynamics because you could finally like shape

sheet metal beyond just like, oh, we built you two boxes and taped them together.

But nobody was really working with it.

This car actually had like a 0.27 or something coefficient of drag.

Next slide, please.

So just to push, drive this home really quick.

This is what a Mercedes-Benz looked like in 1934.

This is a, this is.

Oh, never mind.

I'll take it back.

Some fucking.

Okay, sorry.

Sorry.

No, she was

before you started approving of it.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I was going to say something, but I figured I'd let you stoop for a second.

oh the fact that in the notes there's a quote from hitler saying he likes wow

wow

can't believe buggy you love hitler

turning the hitler particle detector on myself

oh my god

it took like what nine guest appearances

and then you tricked two-thirds of us into becoming hitler

yeah two people into becoming Hitler.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Two Hitlers on this podcast.

Poles are pure of heart.

Exactly.

So in any case, this is what a Hitler car looked like in 1934, right?

I'm booing.

For comparison, you know, you have this streamlined, beautiful piece of art the Czechoslovakians have built,

which is the Tatra T77.

And then you have this, this, you know, it phallic, disgusting fascist car.

Of course.

Yes, yes.

Yes.

Hey, guys, hey, guys, what did the first Hitler say to the second Hitler?

What?

It's whatever you two are talking about right now.

God fuck you.

Don't leave that.

Leave it in.

All right.

You were saying, Victoria, before

Roz rudely interrupted you?

Not us.

Well, yeah, you were having a Hitler conversation.

So in any case, like this is the Nazi strategy to cars was kind of similar to like the American strategy to building cars, which was just more displacement, throw it at the problem.

Eventually the car will go faster.

So you have these enormous hoods.

These cars are not very, like, like this, they aren't super refined yet.

So when the Nazis invade Czechoslovakia in 1937, they freaked the fuck out at the Tatra.

They were like, what is this thing?

This is insane.

Because even as early as 1934, the T-77 is like, it's like a modern car, right?

Like it's like quiet on the freeway.

You can drive it like it's on a freeway.

It can do 55 miles an hour and it's fine, which is not something that cars in the 30s were very good at doing yet.

So

strange.

Adolf Hitler to Ferdinand Borsch

in 1937 says, That, referring to the Tatra T77, is the car for my highways.

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

So Hitler was

talking about the first car.

So

you're Hitler.

Yeah, not us.

Yeah, not us.

No, wait.

No.

Next slide.

Yes, next, you're Hitler.

Next slide.

No, you're Hitler.

Next slide, please.

All right.

Are we going to finally figure out which of us is Hitler?

It's he draws.

Oh my God, it was milkshake all along.

So died 1945.

Born 2023.

Welcome back, Adolf Hitler.

It's just a picture of no.

So

this is the.

God damn it.

I think Milkshake's actually from 2013 or so.

I don't know how old Joe Hitler cut us.

I'm sorry.

I actually don't know either.

I don't think my friend LJ, who actually is the owner of Milkshake, knows either.

No.

No one knows.

No one knows.

I don't know if you have a diamond, really.

Yeah.

So this is the rear of the Tatra 87, which is a similar car that came out around the same time.

Same design.

It's an iteration over the 77.

Beautiful.

This one had a 2.9 liter air-cooled V8 that made 85 horsepower.

Can I say this is beautiful without getting called Hitler?

Yeah, this is beautiful.

It's the car I want.

So it could do 100 miles an hour.

And you can be Hitler.

I'm not Hitler.

It's like the opposite of that game Secret Hitler.

It's like extremely

latent Hitler.

Not latent.

It's an Abbott and Costello bit, but instead of the

Hitler.

Yeah, no, it's actually every player is named Hitler.

Secret Hitler, but everybody gets a Hitler card.

Is

see how long that takes to fuck everything

dealing a bunch of Hitler cards into like fucking like

apples to apples.

Apples to Hitler is not my favorite game.

I don't know.

So I don't know if you do a

murder mystery dinner party, but it turns out that actually everyone is Hitler.

Yeah,

it was Colonel Hitler and the followers.

Let me guess it was in the fewer bunker with a revolver.

Yeah, sometimes less research is more, you know what I mean?

This is the one I actually did all the research on.

Well, sometimes more research is more, I guess.

And the rest of the podcast is going to be fucked.

In a world where everyone is Hitler,

only one man can restore sanity.

Is Is it also Hitler?

No, no, it stars Joseph Stalin.

I was going to say, it better be Stalin, man.

Slowly panning across the street, every man, woman, and child, little postage stamp mustache, even the babies.

The baby in a stroller with a

postage stamp mustache.

Oh, okay.

Get it together.

Get it together.

Delirium.

I'm fine.

I'm going.

Wow.

It's like midnight your time.

Yes, yeah, yeah.

This is like the third thing I've had to do today, and that's like three too many things for me on any given day.

Can you believe this, folks?

November thinks Adolf Hitler is funny.

Oh, this is.

Thank God this isn't going on the main page.

Tell me about this fucking cop.

Okay.

So anyway, pictured here is a Tatra 87.

This is the one that's easier to find stats on because it's like a more modern car.

It's a good thing it's an 87 because it was a Tatra 88.

It would be even more Hitler.

This podcast has reached reached levels of Hitler, previously unprecedented.

People tried to warn us anytime we said anything about Ukraine.

I will it myself.

I came out and talked about cars.

This is inevitable.

The dealership disease is setting in.

Yeah,

I'm going to get a black sun tattoo.

Do you have any lease deals for me on a new Silverado Leo?

Yeah, I just said I have a Black Sun tattoo.

So obviously I also brought a car dealership.

Do you not pay attention to any of your reading material?

You guys remember the plot of the Wolfenstein reboot from 2008?

That's basically me.

Anyway, this car was really good.

About the T-787, Wilhelm Heinz Motor Journal in 1934 said, it is a sensation when it comes to its construction, to its appearance, and to its performance.

However, it isn't a sensation that has just fallen from the skies, but it is a logical extension of the roads themselves, which Hans Ledwinka made 13 years ago.

I remember I looked up who Hans Ledwinka was as for this specifically, and then I forgot.

I'm going to blame the medication

or the two-thirds of a beer.

I mean, two-thirds of a beer hits different when you're recording a podcast.

It also hits different when you're on a lot of medication.

Also, yeah,

also when you're Hitler.