EP 25 - Kelsey Pt. 1

Speaker 1 This is an iHeart podcast.

Speaker 3 You know that feeling when your alarm goes off and your first thought is, why do I feel so awful?

Speaker 5 It's like being betrayed by your own body.

Speaker 7 But here's the plot twist: it's not your fault.

Speaker 1 Dehydration and brain fog are sabotaging you beneath the surface.

Speaker 6 When I found Early Bird's morning cocktail, I felt the shift immediately.

Speaker 12 It's this blood-orange mimosa drink that you mix the night before and you keep on your nightstand.

Speaker 16 When the alarm goes off, you drink, and it's like flipping flipping a switch.

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Speaker 5 It gives me the energy to show up as the best, most accomplished version of myself.

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Speaker 28 My mom was the first one to be like, Does this seem off at all to you?

Speaker 28 It was really the first time someone said something

Speaker 28 that made me think, What do you mean off?

Speaker 28 Like I was immediately defensive.

Speaker 31 I'm Andrea Gunning, and this is Betrayal, a show about the people we trust the most and the deceptions that change everything.

Speaker 28 When I hear other people's horrific stories of things that have happened to them, I now have a lens of what a human experience to love so deeply that we're willing to suspend disbelief that high is like

Speaker 31 i truly believe that deception really comes from a deep desire to be loved and i can sympathize with the desire to be loved this is kelsey's story of building her life around someone else's lies lies that consumed kelse 20s derailed her early career and destroyed her sense of trust For many years, she tried to hide from the deception she experienced.

Speaker 31 But now, she's ready to tell her story.

Speaker 31 As a listener note, names and locations have been changed to protect privacy.

Speaker 31 When she was a little girl, Kelsey's mom told her the origin story of their family unit. It was a survival story.

Speaker 28 My dad was really abusive to all of us kids and my mom. And so my mom was finally able to get out.
when I was about three months old.

Speaker 28 She packed all of us up, left my dad, and drove cross-country to my mom's hometown.

Speaker 28 That's where I spent most of my life.

Speaker 31 Her mom and the three girls started anew in a small West Coast town, but the fear of her dad was always looming in the background.

Speaker 28 He actually went to prison after my mom left. And if he got out of prison, there was this fear that my dad would find us one day.

Speaker 31 Nearly everyone in their new town was Mormon, and their family wasn't. Their dad was Cuban.
So Kelsey and her sisters stood out in a sea of blonde hair and blue eyes.

Speaker 28 I remember my mom would like brush out my hair so I looked more white and so I looked like the other Mormon girls in town and then essentially told me not to talk about my background, which worked because she was also, I think, hiding us from my dad in prison.

Speaker 31 Her mom's survival story had another chapter. For Kelsey's entire childhood, her mom battled breast cancer.

Speaker 28 It was finally getting away from my dad, but then she had a bout of cancer she thought she was going to die from.

Speaker 31 As a kid, Kelsey didn't know the details. She just knew her mom was exhausted and was always going to the hospital.

Speaker 28 And that was definitely on purpose. I think that she wanted to be super careful.
And even when I asked her about it, I even remember her saying, this was private. This this is adult things.

Speaker 28 I don't want to scare you.

Speaker 28 I'm protecting you from this information.

Speaker 31 Kelsey's escape was the Girl Scouts.

Speaker 28 I had this tiny pocket of girlhood that was so fun, like waiting once a week with my girlfriends to earn badges.

Speaker 28 When I think about where I felt like I mattered most,

Speaker 28 it was there.

Speaker 31 Over the summer, she started going to Girl Scout camp. There, she was allowed to just be a kid.

Speaker 28 I would go for weeks at a time. I just loved summer camp.
I was meeting women who were older than me, who were models of what it was like to really be yourself.

Speaker 28 Ugh, I have the best memories at Girl Scout Camp.

Speaker 31 The women who ran the camp were Kelsey's idols. She wanted to be just like them.

Speaker 28 I just thought they were so special and cool. I just thought, that's it.
I'll be there one day.

Speaker 31 As she got older and entered high school, she started dreaming about broadening her horizons.

Speaker 28 I'm going to do whatever it takes to get out of the state I was raised in and really find myself. So I got perfect grades and worked really hard in school.
But this was also around the same time

Speaker 28 that I fell in love for the first time and I fell in love with a girl in the grade above me.

Speaker 31 Kelsey and her high school girlfriend kept their relationship a secret. It was in the mid-2000s and they were in a mostly Mormon community.

Speaker 28 At the time, I think I was afraid of being gay. Definitely afraid of the implications of it.

Speaker 31 So she set her sights on going to college in a place where she could be out and be herself. She was accepted to her first choice and made the leap.

Speaker 28 I loved being on my own for the first time.

Speaker 28 I came out. and openly had a relationship and thought that was so special.

Speaker 28 And I was doing really good in school.

Speaker 31 But her family's finances took an unexpected turn. So after the first year, Kelsey had to transfer to a new university, one that she'd be paying for herself.

Speaker 28 I transferred to the public university. I was just pretty isolated and it wasn't a dream for me, but it's all I could afford.

Speaker 31 She worked to put herself through college. And she started working summers as a counselor at her old Girl Scout camp.

Speaker 28 It was life-changing, and I loved it.

Speaker 31 By her third summer, she earned an executive leadership role at the camp, helping coordinate all the younger counselors.

Speaker 28 I was doing real programming work and I went to summer camp that year early because senior staff meets early before counselors get there.

Speaker 31 Arriving at camp was a much anticipated reunion where she saw all of her closest friends again.

Speaker 28 I had a lot of friends at camp. Like I had been really established there.
This This was the first work experience I ever had when I was out. And for the first time at camp, we had other queer people.

Speaker 28 They really diversified our pool of hiring that year.

Speaker 31 One of the new counselors immediately caught Kelsey's attention. Her name was Morgan.

Speaker 28 I remember her walking into the office. She was very sporty.
So she had the classic REI look. And then they'll cut off hair.
And she just had the most beautiful eyes. I just remember thinking, ah,

Speaker 28 Mostly because it was the most radical thing I'd ever known for someone to cut off their hair.

Speaker 31 When they first met, Morgan was shy. She kept to herself and seemed guarded.

Speaker 28 I found her to be really mysterious.

Speaker 31 But she and Morgan had a close mutual friend in common.

Speaker 28 My other camp friend really vouched for her and was like, trust me, when she opens up, you're going to love her.

Speaker 31 And over time, she did. It felt like she chose Kelsey.

Speaker 28 I felt really honored. I I just felt like she kind of opened up more to me.
I felt really privileged to be the one person that she was opening up to.

Speaker 28 Like we would spend the weekend after training just talking. Everyone's like, oh my gosh, I can't believe you got her to talk to you.
That's how shy she was.

Speaker 28 And she was telling me like really intimate details about her life.

Speaker 31 Even though Morgan was only 20 years old, she'd been through a lot.

Speaker 28 She had shared about some sexual assault, body dysmorphia,

Speaker 28 struggles with an eating disorder.

Speaker 28 I just felt like I really knew her.

Speaker 31 Morgan confided in her. Forming close bonds was a hallmark of the camp experience.
They would be spending every day together for the next three months.

Speaker 28 In camp time, that's three years.

Speaker 28 It's a massive amount of time that people don't normally get to spend in a very intense environment where you're like growing and learning and changing about yourself and learning learning things from kids and teaching kids of remarkable things that change you.

Speaker 28 It really is a lifetime together.

Speaker 31 At camp, there were no cell phones, no distractions from the outside world. And in this bubble, Kelsey knew she was developing feelings for Morgan, but she was in a leadership role.

Speaker 31 And then there was this.

Speaker 28 Camp relationships are famously. compassionate and intense and destructive, which is why we avoid them at all costs.

Speaker 31 So they continued on with a supercharged friendship. It was a connection Morgan needed.
At home, she'd been struggling with an eating disorder.

Speaker 28 She had shared that she was really struggling with her eating disorder at camp. And eating with your campers is such a huge part of the experience.
Like you're with your campers 24-7

Speaker 28 and we're really rigid at camp about calorie intake and water intake.

Speaker 31 That kind of structure and vigilance around food was really triggering for Morgan. In fact, it was having an impact on her job performance.

Speaker 28 She had gotten disciplinary write-ups from the camp director. If she didn't get it under control, this was not going to be the job for her.

Speaker 31 The idea of losing Morgan at camp was upsetting. Kelsey felt a responsibility to help as both a friend and a camp executive.

Speaker 28 And so she was really nervous about losing her job because she really loved the work. I remember spending all of my free time.

Speaker 28 I got books from the local library and brought them up to camp and was reading about eating disorders. Like I really became

Speaker 28 her resource to staying. I was like, I'll help you stay.
Don't worry. I've got this under control.
And I really felt responsible for that.

Speaker 31 They were spending a lot of time together, even when they had days off.

Speaker 28 We would travel as friends, like off to go to Walmart and get face wipes or to a local festival.

Speaker 28 We tried to get as much time off from camp as possible. My outside of camp time became Morgan time.

Speaker 31 About halfway through the summer, they took a day off together and drove to Kelsey's hometown.

Speaker 28 And I just think there was this little switch. One weekend, we were just alone for the first time really together.
And then we kissed.

Speaker 31 Now it was clear that the attraction was mutual.

Speaker 28 After that that week, we started sharing like a journal.

Speaker 28 So we had a notebook that we would write notes to each other and then keep it in a cubby and then I'd write it, put it away, and she'd write it and put it away.

Speaker 28 And so we sort of had this very sweet romance at camp.

Speaker 31 Near the end of camp, Morgan's parents came to town. They were devout Mormons.
And on that visit, Morgan wanted to come out to them.

Speaker 31 Kelsey drove her to meet them, to be there for emotional support.

Speaker 28 She met with her parents and I wasn't with her. I was in the parking lot, but I remember seeing them at a picnic bench.

Speaker 28 She came out to them and it didn't go well. She got back in the car.
She was like, they

Speaker 28 believe I'm living in sin. They think this is wrong.

Speaker 28 They think that any person who had influence over me is of the devil and that I should separate myself from those people.

Speaker 28 She was was really, really emotional about it.

Speaker 31 Her parents' rejection brought the two of them even closer.

Speaker 28 It sort of deepened that connection. It was like, look what we're fighting for.

Speaker 31 There was so much at stake and Morgan was now left on her own. They made their relationship official.
And when camp ended, Morgan couldn't go home. So they decided to move in together.

Speaker 28 We were all like, look how adult we are. We'll have our own space and our own beds.
So it wasn't like, oh, I live with my girlfriend now.

Speaker 28 It was very much like we were just continuing the summer camp experience. I think we were on that high of the summer fling.

Speaker 31 It was Kelsey's last year of college. At first, living with Morgan was a novelty.
Even mundane tasks were exciting.

Speaker 28 Figuring out bus schedules, like everything was just really fun. I also remember doing paintball fights and

Speaker 28 making cookies cookies and burning them for the neighbors.

Speaker 31 But soon, reality set in.

Speaker 28 I was working also a full-time job while I was in school because I had to pay for it. I was doing everything to put me on the trajectory to go to my master's program.

Speaker 28 And at this point, I was on track to be valedictorian.

Speaker 31 Kelsey's priority was school.

Speaker 28 We just weren't getting as much time together and were like drifting a little bit.

Speaker 31 But right when the semester began picking up steam, Kelsey started receiving emails from Morgan's family.

Speaker 28 I remember them very explicitly. One was from her dad.
One was from her mom saying that it was an abomination, that I was poisoning Morgan, that I took her away from the life of Christ.

Speaker 28 It didn't help that the person Morgan was waiting for to come back from a mission had come back, and they had really hoped that she would marry him.

Speaker 28 Every time I got a message from them, it was very nasty.

Speaker 31 The message was clear. They thought Kelsey brainwashed their daughter and they wanted her to leave Morgan alone.

Speaker 28 Morgan's very sacred and pure. Stop this now before you ruin that forever for her.

Speaker 28 Like they deeply wanted to make me hate myself so I didn't feel deserving of Morgan.

Speaker 31 The messages were overwhelming.

Speaker 28 After a couple months, it got complicated very quickly. It was just that feeling of thinking that I was destroying someone's salvation.

Speaker 28 It was taxing.

Speaker 31 But Morgan was fixated. All she wanted to do was talk about her parents with Kelsey.

Speaker 28 It's like,

Speaker 28 I'm with you. I care about you, but like, I can't.
process this with you all the time. I think I started feeling like she needs to branch out, like I realistically can't be everything for her.

Speaker 31 Between the stress of school and the drama with Morgan's parents, Kelsey's connection with Morgan was fading.

Speaker 28 That intimate connection felt like it stayed at camp. In the real world, it was kind of hard to sustain because I had a lot of ambition.
I was really excited about starting my life somewhere new.

Speaker 28 And it just suddenly was like, oh, this is kind of affecting my ability to be present at work in school. And I'm really rigid about doing right by my career.

Speaker 31 So Kelsey made a tough decision.

Speaker 28 Ultimately, I came home from school one day

Speaker 28 and said,

Speaker 28 this is not what I want anymore. And I think it's better if we break up.
She said, okay, and then left, which she would do a lot when she was trying to process something. She would go for a run.

Speaker 28 So she went for a run. and came back and I was already asleep and she was asleep and we went to bed.

Speaker 31 The next day, Kelsey came home from school to find Morgan on their couch in tears. There was something she needed to tell Kelsey.

Speaker 28 I sat down with her, and she had explained that

Speaker 28 she had been hiding something from me that she didn't want to talk to me about because she didn't want to burden me with it, but she just got really bad news.

Speaker 28 I honestly thought at the time that it was something with her parents.

Speaker 31 But it wasn't about her parents.

Speaker 28 That's when she shared that she had been living with terminal bone cancer

Speaker 28 and she was in remission. But her doctors gave her the prognosis when she was at the doctor today

Speaker 28 that she had three months to live.

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Speaker 3 You know that feeling when your alarm goes off and your first thought is, why do I feel so awful?

Speaker 5 It's like being betrayed by your own body.

Speaker 7 But here's the plot twist.

Speaker 8 It's not your fault.

Speaker 1 Dehydration and brain fog are sabotaging you beneath the surface.

Speaker 12 When I found Early Bird's morning cocktail, I felt the shift immediately.

Speaker 14 It's this blood-orange mimosa drink that you mix the night before and you keep on your nightstand.

Speaker 16 When the alarm goes off, you drink and it's like flipping a switch.

Speaker 15 Clean energy, no brain fog, no crash.

Speaker 17 I'm in control of my day again.

Speaker 5 Early Bird is clinically engineered to target morning fatigue from all angles. There's clean, natural caffeine, mood-lifting nootropics, and a supercharged electrolyte blend to combat dehydration.

Speaker 21 This is more than just a morning drink.

Speaker 24 It's a science-backed tool to help you take control of your mornings and own your potential.

Speaker 21 It gives me the energy to show up as the best, most accomplished version of myself.

Speaker 25 Discover how good it feels to rise and grind on your own terms.

Speaker 26 Visit clubearlybird.com and use code BETRAIL for 20% off.

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Speaker 29 Anibay has designed the only fully machine washable sofa from top to bottom. The stain-resistant performance fabric slip covers and cloud-like frame duvet can go straight into your wash.

Speaker 29 Perfect for anyone with kids, pets, or anyone who loves an easy-to-clean, spotless sofa. With a modular design and changeable slip covers, you can customize your sofa to fit any space and style.

Speaker 29 Whether you need a single chair, love seat, or a luxuriously large sectional, Annabay has you covered. Visit washable sofas.com to upgrade your home.

Speaker 29 Sofas started just $699 and right now, get early access to Black Friday savings, up to 60% off store-wide with a 30-day money-back guarantee. Shop now at washablesofas.com.

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Speaker 29 to your life. Offers are subject to change and certain restrictions may apply.

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Speaker 1 The weight came off, but facial volume loss and dull sagging skin are making you look older.

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Speaker 31 Just when Kelsey thought her relationship with Morgan was over, Morgan came to her with devastating news. She had bone cancer and she was dying.

Speaker 31 Kelsey was no stranger to cancer. She grew up watching her mother's breast cancer go into remission and return again.
It was a horrible cycle.

Speaker 31 And to think another person she loved was going through this was hard to fathom.

Speaker 28 I don't think I got it at first.

Speaker 31 Morgan had known about the diagnosis all along, but she was just telling her now that the cancer had returned when she only had three months to live.

Speaker 28 I asked her more details.

Speaker 28 She said she was diagnosed when she first went to college.

Speaker 28 She had an injury, a bone break. They did some testing and they discovered that she had cancer.
She was fighting it for about a semester, but she beat that bout and then

Speaker 28 hadn't had a recurrence until

Speaker 28 that day.

Speaker 31 She was so flooded with grief for Morgan that the breakup became an afterthought.

Speaker 28 I remember feeling so deeply sad because my breakup with Morgan was never about not loving her.

Speaker 28 I cared about her so deeply. The thought of her dying was insane to me and felt so unfair, especially to have this prognosis with her family not being very close.
I was devastated for her.

Speaker 28 We were sobbing and then we went to bed and I remember holding her, thinking of, no, no, this is like my partner going through cancer. This isn't, oh, my ex-girlfriend from yesterday.

Speaker 28 This was someone I love so deeply, dying. Like this really is the end of someone's life.

Speaker 31 The next morning, Kelsey woke up with a new perspective.

Speaker 28 It changed the way I framed our relationship. I felt grateful that she was alive and I was ready to figure this out together.

Speaker 31 So she sat down at the kitchen table with her laptop and a notepad. to talk about what this would mean.

Speaker 31 Luckily, Morgan had some answers.

Speaker 28 She's like, I already have a plan with my doctor. We're going to start treatment.
It's really unlikely that I'll survive this treatment, but it's worthy of taking a shot.

Speaker 28 And so that's what she did.

Speaker 31 During the day, Kelsey would attend class for her senior year of college, and Morgan would spend the day at the hospital.

Speaker 28 The next few weeks, she was doing treatment all the time, like four or five times a week. She would leave the house and come back really tired and

Speaker 28 struggled to keep a conversation, struggled to stay awake.

Speaker 28 She was just deeply impacted by the treatment.

Speaker 31 Quickly, Kelsey took on a caretaker role.

Speaker 28 I started really doing some research and taking care of her. I was making meals.

Speaker 31 Once again, she was juggling the weight of school and being there for Morgan.

Speaker 28 I distinctly remember trying to complete homework and being like, I can't finish this. She's puking somewhere, thinking like, get your priorities straight.
This is someone's life.

Speaker 28 This is the end of their human life. And you're worried about like not finishing this math problem.

Speaker 28 Like, why was I wasting my time on these early morning classes for like my own benefit when she only had a few months left to live? I just suddenly felt selfish and stupid.

Speaker 28 And that's really the moment that I reframed my entire life.

Speaker 31 For the first time in her life, Kelsey let school take a back seat.

Speaker 28 I was letting go of a lot of things I'd worked my whole life toward, but I was like, I can do this for three months for somebody to enjoy the last few months of their life.

Speaker 31 Christmas was a few weeks away. With Morgan's family out of the picture, they decided to celebrate with a family friend,

Speaker 31 an older woman named Joanne, who'd been a mentor to Morgan for years.

Speaker 28 She considered her like a second mom. We drove out of state to visit her.
This family friend was with her when Morgan got her first diagnosis of having gone cancer.

Speaker 28 And she was with her when she was doing IV treatments. To meet someone who was so intimately involved with her treatments, I felt really bonded right away.

Speaker 28 I remember her saying, I didn't even know what I was doing. I just got kind of thrown into this.
I was like, I didn't know what I was doing either.

Speaker 31 It was a relief to talk with someone else who'd been involved with Morgan's care. She was a great resource.
For Christmas, Morgan and Kelsey got each other something special.

Speaker 28 We got rings for our wedding?

Speaker 31 Rings for their wedding. Morgan wanted to get married to Kelsey.
It was a legal and financial decision.

Speaker 28 Her attorney had shared with her that when she died, her health payout would be really big and it would go to her parents because that's next of kin.

Speaker 28 And that was really overwhelming for her. Like she had fought so hard for her queerness and now suddenly in her death as a queer woman, all this money would be granted to her parents.

Speaker 28 But if she were married to me,

Speaker 28 then I would get to decide where that money goes.

Speaker 31 Morgan wanted the money to be donated to a library foundation. Kelsey was honored to help facilitate one of her final wishes.

Speaker 28 Of course, whatever you need to do what you want to do with the end of your life. So for her, this was a really meaningful way of honoring her life.
So

Speaker 28 we agreed that we would get married.

Speaker 31 Kelsey felt a responsibility to make sure every day was a good day.

Speaker 28 I tried to make our life so joyful and loving and

Speaker 28 silly.

Speaker 28 And that's how we just tried to spend our time. We didn't have very much left.

Speaker 31 But the days were still difficult, especially as Morgan's health worsened.

Speaker 28 She would go to treatment and come back and throw up. She was tired all the time.
I remember coming home from work and she'd have like fallen over.

Speaker 28 She seemed very weak to me. And this is also how my mom would describe her treatments going through breast cancer.
Morgan would like lose her hair.

Speaker 28 I'd come home and she'd have taken a nap and she'd have hair on the pillow. And I'd be like, oh my God, your hair.

Speaker 31 This only furthered Kelsey's resolve to support Morgan. She offered again to go to the hospital with her, to be by her side as she got treatment.
Morgan said no. She didn't want to be a burden.

Speaker 28 She was very, very clear. this was her private journey and that she had already burdened me enough and she didn't want me to lose work or lose school.

Speaker 31 After all, it was Kelsey's job that kept them afloat financially. As the weeks went on, the treatment seemed to be slowing the progression of her cancer.
And Morgan hit the three-month mark.

Speaker 28 By that time, we had gotten word that she'd be that bout of cancer. There was a lot of medical language, but essentially it was like,

Speaker 28 we're doing good. Hold on.

Speaker 28 Not you'll live, but like, I'm feeling okay today and for the next couple of weeks because I think this treatment is working.

Speaker 31 For the past three months, Kelsey had been bracing herself for the end, putting her all into caring for Morgan. It had been exhausting.

Speaker 28 I still worked full-time. I still finished my degree.
By the time graduation came around, I just like barely made it. Like I barely emotionally, physically, spiritually made it.

Speaker 28 I just remember being an empty person when my family came for graduation.

Speaker 28 I just felt like nothing.

Speaker 31 In her last semester, she earned Bs and C's, and her dreams of being valedictorian were dashed.

Speaker 31 Instead of giving the valedictorian speech, she applied to be an honorary student speaker at commencement.

Speaker 28 I was able to stand alongside the valedictorian, which

Speaker 28 would have been me, and share my story about what happened with my partner, like what it really meant for me to give up my schooling in order to help someone I loved.

Speaker 31 After she graduated, they finally had the time to plan a small wedding ceremony. At the time, same-sex marriage wasn't legal in their state, so they had to travel.

Speaker 28 She didn't feel good enough to fly.

Speaker 28 But she did feel good enough to drive. So that's when we booked our trip for our wedding ceremony.

Speaker 31 Kelsey drove them to California with Morgan asleep in the passenger seat. Along the way, they camped in national parks.

Speaker 28 There was something really beautiful and intimate. It felt like the end to me.

Speaker 28 She just didn't seem all there.

Speaker 28 But there's something about being in nature together and our dynamic started in nature. It was actually really beautiful.
The whole trip, we took disposable cameras

Speaker 28 and

Speaker 28 it was very fleeting and and lovely. And I remember one of the nights just before we had our ceremony, we slept on the beach of the lost coast, and there was something really poetic about waking up.

Speaker 28 Morgan was still sleeping, and I got out of the tent and looked out into the ocean and just thought,

Speaker 28 if I can love someone this big,

Speaker 28 one day after Morgan's passing, someone will be able to love me in this way back.

Speaker 31 The day before the ceremony, they both sat down to write their vows.

Speaker 28 We wrote our vows on like hotel napkins.

Speaker 28 Like my white dress is in the corner. I'm like sitting down with this piece of paper and I suddenly didn't know what to say.

Speaker 28 It's like vows are for promising to someone, but I don't know how to promise something to her in her death. Like it just suddenly felt wrong.

Speaker 31 Maybe it was nerves.

Speaker 19 She couldn't help but overthink the whole thing.

Speaker 28 I gotta stop getting getting in my head and so I like kind of cleared my head of everything.

Speaker 31 And this was the commitment she made.

Speaker 28 Promising her that

Speaker 28 the memory of her and who I knew her to be and like the love that people didn't get the chance to know, especially her family,

Speaker 28 that would live on.

Speaker 31 They delivered their vows and signed the papers in Sequoia National Park.

Speaker 28 We drove into the woods and

Speaker 28 found a really neat tree that was two trees that like corkscrewed into one and there was like one little spot where you could squeeze into and so we squeezed into these trees and signed the paperwork and

Speaker 28 we left.

Speaker 31 Being officially married was a relief. It was the final thing Morgan wanted to do before she passed away.

Speaker 28 We drove back from California and I was like driving into the sun as it was going down, thinking, I know in my heart that I've done everything that I possibly can for Morgan to feel loved well.

Speaker 28 Like, I felt like I had finished what I needed to do. I remember her looking at me with a lot of love and like she saw me as a wife.

Speaker 28 Like, I almost felt her relief, like, okay, got it. Everything's going to be okay.

Speaker 28 I obviously interpret that differently now.

Speaker 3 You know that feeling when your alarm goes off and your first thought is, why do I feel so awful?

Speaker 5 It's like being betrayed by your own body.

Speaker 7 But here's the plot twist: it's not your fault.

Speaker 1 Dehydration and brain fog are sabotaging you beneath the surface.

Speaker 6 When I found Early Bird's morning cocktail, I felt the shift immediately.

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Speaker 17 I'm in control of my day again.

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Speaker 31 In less than a year, Kelsey and Morgan went from being 21-year-olds at camp to being a married couple, handling a terminal disease.

Speaker 31 Now they were committed to each other for however much time Morgan had left.

Speaker 31 Kelsey had been accepted into a master's program across the country. Neither of them expected Morgan to be alive for that next chapter.

Speaker 28 We're illegally married, and

Speaker 28 now

Speaker 28 it's a little complicated because I don't know

Speaker 28 how to bring up, like, how am I supposed to navigate the next few months?

Speaker 31 Morgan's successful treatment meant she had more time. She could take a break from treatment, but her cancer was still deemed terminal.

Speaker 2 No one knew how long she really had left, not even her doctors.

Speaker 28 It was very much like,

Speaker 28 this is what we've been told, and we're lucky to have this little bit of extra time.

Speaker 28 It was suddenly another continuation, another chapter of live like you're dying.

Speaker 31 Kelsey didn't know what this meant for her plans to start graduate school. She barely got through her last semester.

Speaker 28 I was really conflicted. I was like, oh no, this is everything I've worked for and I can still go.
I still got in and I could still do it, but I can't because it's going to be with Morgan. And

Speaker 28 I'm grateful that she's still alive. I'm truly grateful, but I also feel like I've lost myself and I don't know how to gain it back if she's still here.
Like I hadn't planned for it.

Speaker 31 She was worried about juggling her master's program and supporting Morgan at the same time. She didn't even know if she could handle that, but she decided,

Speaker 28 I

Speaker 28 said we would do this and we're married now. And so now we're going to travel across the country and start my master's together.

Speaker 31 They rented a U-Haul and began the cross-country drive. Along the way, they made a pit stop to see Joanne.
Morgan's mentor.

Speaker 28 She was sort of our middle point between the West Coast and the East Coast. And when we got to her place, I immediately sensed that there was some sort of tension between them.

Speaker 28 Like maybe an argument had been had and I didn't know about it. It just felt like we were kind of dancing around something that was unsaid.

Speaker 31 It was clear something had come between Joanne and Morgan. Joanne said she wanted to talk to Kelsey in private, but they just couldn't find the right moment.

Speaker 28 At the end of their stay, I could tell that she was holding back from saying something, but she just said, okay, good luck. And that was it.
So there was sort of this like mystery about this

Speaker 28 odd dynamic we had walked away from. And that made me nervous.
I distinctly remember being in the U-Haul and Morgan being asleep next to me and thinking,

Speaker 28 we're about to move to a new state. I don't know anyone in.
She doesn't know anyone in. We have no friends or family.

Speaker 28 And the one really close family connection that she has, she sort of just had a rupture with. It was really the first time I thought like, oh, this is really just us now.

Speaker 31 When they arrived in their new city, they had to face the reality of living alone. Kelsey found a job in hospitality while she started her master's degree.
But Morgan was too sick to work.

Speaker 28 And

Speaker 28 the reality of... affording grad school, working full-time, going to school full-time, paying for both of our lives and also paying for cancer treatments, medicines

Speaker 31 was really a tremendous burden.

Speaker 31 Kelsey was only 22 and she was the sole provider. Morgan found new doctors.
And now that they were married, Kelsey was paying for more of Morgan's care.

Speaker 28 I would say like 25% of every paycheck was going to Morgan.

Speaker 28 And so after a couple months of being on the East Coast, it was like thousands and thousands of dollars we were pouring into anything related to her health.

Speaker 31 She became hyper-fixated on financials.

Speaker 28 I remember specifically Googling what it actually costs if someone dies.

Speaker 28 She wanted to be cremated, and I just remember looking at this $1,500 price tag, thinking, I'm never going to get what I need to cremate her.

Speaker 31 But she found it hard to have open conversations with Morgan about it.

Speaker 28 Because she didn't want to talk about death. It was just like every tiny little thing

Speaker 28 was overwhelmingly my responsibility.

Speaker 31 It had been a year since Morgan shared her diagnosis. Even though Kelsey was now paying for Morgan's care, she still wasn't privy to the details of it.

Speaker 28 I wasn't even sure how to broach the topic of like, can we go together to your doctor to get an update on what we can look at? Can we reassess your medications?

Speaker 31 But Morgan didn't want to talk about it. She wanted to do everything alone.
And that worried Kelsey.

Speaker 28 What happens if I don't know where you are? How do I get like your health record? Like there was suddenly some like logistics they didn't really have the answers to.

Speaker 31 The lack of information was becoming a real problem for Kelsey. It became a wedge in their relationship.

Speaker 28 This is where things started shifting in our dynamic, where it's like, I need real concrete answers. What is your current prognosis? Like, how is your body doing? Where is the cancer in your body?

Speaker 31 Without any answers, she was getting frustrated. She felt like she couldn't help Morgan if she didn't have all the information.
That year, they spent Christmas with Kelsey's family.

Speaker 28 We flew home. Morgan was so sick that she could barely even talk.
She was lethargic. She was sleepy all the time.
She was throwing up.

Speaker 28 Whatever new medication, whatever new treatment she was trying. was really taxing.
Like I remember taking photos together that trip and she's sleeping in all of them.

Speaker 31 This was the second time they thought it was their last Christmas together. And it was the first time Kelsey's mom was getting to really spend time with Morgan.

Speaker 28 My mom had pulled me aside at some point during this holiday and she was the first one to be like,

Speaker 28 does this seem off at all to you?

Speaker 28 And it was really the first time someone like said something that made me think like, what do you mean off?

Speaker 28 I was immediately defensive.

Speaker 31 Still, Kelsey's mom insisted that something didn't add up.

Speaker 31 She was starting to feel skeptical about Morgan's story.

Speaker 28 My mom, who obviously has experience of cancer, was like, it just feels off.

Speaker 28 Like when she's around us, something feels off.

Speaker 31 Before this moment, Kelsey had never doubted Morgan's diagnosis. For nearly two years, Her entire life revolved around Morgan's health.

Speaker 28 I had felt like a bad person for even feeling burdened by cancer.

Speaker 28 I had never considered doubting it at all.

Speaker 28 But this is when I started to feel doubtful.

Speaker 28 And

Speaker 28 that was when she started breaking bones.

Speaker 31 On the next episode of Betrayal.

Speaker 28 I got a Facebook message. She's like, I've been down a rabbit hole about Morgan.

Speaker 28 I have proof there's a lot more to this story. And

Speaker 28 that's when it really blew open.

Speaker 31 If you would like to reach out to the betrayal team or want to tell us your betrayal story, email us at betrayalpod at gmail.com. That's betrayal, p-od at gmail.com.
We're grateful for your support.

Speaker 31 One way to show support is by subscribing to our show on Apple Podcasts. And don't forget to rate and review review Betrayal.
Five-star reviews go a long way.

Speaker 28 A big thank you to all of our listeners.

Speaker 31 Betrayal is a production of Glass Podcasts, a division of Glass Entertainment Group in partnership with iHeart Podcasts. The show is executive produced by Nancy Glass and Jennifer Faison.

Speaker 31 Hosted and produced by me, Andrea Gunning.

Speaker 31 Written and produced by Monique Laborde. Also produced by Ben Fetterman.
Associate producers are Kristen Mel Curie and Caitlin Golden. Our iHeart team is Allie Perry and Jessica Kreincheck.

Speaker 31 Audio editing and mixing by Matt Delvecchio. Additional editing support from Tanner Robbins.
Betrayals theme composed by Oliver Baines. Music library provided by MIBE Music.

Speaker 31 And for more podcasts from iHeart, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Speaker 6 When your alarm goes off in the morning, do you feel energized?

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Speaker 37 A decade ago, I was on the trail of one of the country's most elusive serial killers. But it wasn't until 2023 when he was finally caught.
The answers were there, hidden in plain sight.

Speaker 37 So why did it take so long to catch him? I'm Josh Zeman, and this is Monster, Hunting the Long Island Serial Killer.

Speaker 37 The investigation into the most notorious killer in New York, since the son of Sam, available now. Listen for free on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Speaker 38 A new true crime podcast from Tenderfoot TV in the city of Mons in Belgium. Women began to go missing.

Speaker 38 It was only after their dismembered remains began turning up in various places that residents realized a sadistic serial killer was lurking among them. The murders have never been solved.

Speaker 38 Three decades later, we've unearthed new evidence. Le Monstre, Season 2, is available now.
Listen for free on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Speaker 1 This is an iHeart podcast.