Monologue: Don't Buy A Switch 2, Get A Handheld Gaming PC

This is an iHeart podcast.

On Fox One, you can stream your favorite news, sports, and entertainment live, all in one app.

It's fing roll and unfiltered.

This is the best thing ever.

Watch breaking news as it breaks.

Breaking tonight, we're following two major stories.

And catch history in the making.

Gibby, meet Freddy.

Debates,

drama, touchdowns.

It's all here, baby.

Fox One.

We live for live.

Streaming now.

Coolzone Media.

Hello, and welcome to this week's Better Offline monologue.

I'm your host, Ed Zitron.

And let's start with one point.

Fuck Nintendo.

Back in February, Nintendo said that shortages of the Nintendo Switch will not be a problem and came up with a genius, to quote multiple outlets means of keeping scalpers from buying them all by requiring those buying on Nintendo.com to have at least 12 months of Nintendo Online memberships as well as 50 combined hours of Nintendo Switch gameplay.

Two weeks before launch, Nintendo America boss Doug Bowser and yes, that is his name said that the company believed it would have enough units to meet consumer demand throughout the holidays.

Guess what?

They didn't make enough and now the Nintendo Switch 2 is sold out everywhere with scalpers charging hundreds of dollars extra on eBay.

If you're someone who's gonna email saying you are easily able to buy one, you're an exception to the rule and you fucking know it.

Fuck Nintendo.

They do this shit every time, creating artificial scarcity and then blaming it on unanticipated demand that they know will be there.

They do this every single time.

They did it back with the fucking Wii.

It happens every time.

I despise this company.

They have this weird fucked up relationship with consumers where they like turn them into pay pigs where it's just like, hey,

we're going to do a new Zelda game.

You want to do that?

Dance for me, you little piglet.

And I say say this as someone who's bought a Nintendo Switch.

I don't know.

I'm just...

Of the companies I'm most tired of, kind of Nintendo's up there.

While they may have their nice ecosystem.

Wait, I'm not talking about a Nintendo here.

I have a better suggestion.

A much better suggestion.

Buy a portable gaming PC instead.

Since the Steam Deck launched in 2022, you've been able to play a remarkable amount of very, very good games like Elden Ring and Boulder's Gate 3 with better graphics, no need to hand cash to a company that fucking lies to you every time they launch a console.

There's the Steam Deck and its OLED screened upgrade pick, there's the MSI Clause 7, Lenovo's Legion Go, and one I actually got sent by Asus recently, their ROG Ally X, and I really like it.

One thing though, there is a downside, other than in the case of the Steam Deck, and it's Windows.

Windows 11 is really, really funky with these handhelds.

I'm going to do a far more developed episode on the ROG Ally X and others when I've spent more time with it, but Windows really does not like the handheld form factor, and Microsoft has clearly not made much of an effort to make sure that probably the most interesting form factor in pc gaming if not gadgets in years actually fucking works now the reason i've kind of said the steam deck is different is they use their own operating system steam os which is a linux based system that really works very well except for when it comes to anti-cheat measures but that's just something you'll have to deal with i know others are considering doing steam os integrations i really hope so because i love steam os it's really good and the reason i don't play my steam deck that much is because like I got, I got, like, I just don't like the...

It doesn't feel good in my hands, okay?

A lot of these things are going to be like that for you.

It's why later on I suggest you go and play with one.

But across the board, there's another challenge.

There's a battery life problem.

Two to eight hours, allegedly.

But if I'm honest, running a ROG Ally X at full tilt turbo mode is going to drain the battery pretty quickly.

I haven't done official battery tests.

I was still able to play for a couple of hours.

It was good.

I was playing stuff on full tilt too.

But this is one case where I'm fully willing to say we're only a few years in.

Battery tech and chips will get smaller, and these things will last longer.

Right now, they fit nicely in the hand, but they're a touch heavy and get a little hot, which is kind of silly for PC gaming.

Either way, while I've played with a few of these handhelds, the Steam Deck and Rog Alli X are the ones I've had the most time with, and Nasus is really great.

It can't really run Doom the Dark Ages very well, it looks like a PS4 or PS3 version.

It's been great for playing Madden 25, Redacted, Hades 2, the new Oblivion Remaster, and a bunch of emulation stuff.

Both the Steam Deck and the Rogala X also use power delivery, which is in a lot of modern charges.

Though I will add the ROG Ally X wanted to charge at 90 watts when I plugged it in the other day.

Kind of weird, but I also was playing something a little bit taxing on it.

These things are also not cheap, and while the Steam Deck is $399, it's getting on a bit.

And the more recent, yet year-old ROG LAX is 800 bucks, though I should add it's more powerful and has a 128Hz screen.

I also really like it.

Like, I've just been, I've been playing with it a lot.

Yeah, I know on this show I'm constantly bitching about stuff such as like one minute ago, but I really do like the Rogala X.

The Steam Deck is just too chunky for me.

Too chunky.

I don't know if I've got small hands, but for my hands, they're kind of chubby.

Just like the Rogala X more.

And I will say, there are other options too, more powerful options.

And like the GPD Win4 is like $1,000.

It's too much.

It doesn't do enough.

It's not worth your money.

The Rogali X for $800, I actually really like.

I think

you will be using this thing for years and you'll be very happy with it.

And you could probably plug it into a battery when you're charging as well, so it will keep going.

And I'll say, this segment is probably the most exciting part of the tech industry for me at the moment.

And it's also the way I do most of my gaming.

These consoles work really well.

Yeah, they're a little bulky right now.

Yeah, they got heating things, but there have been significant leaps between generations as far as power and battery life goes.

I really hope we see more companies get into this space.

And as they do, I'll probably end up playing with their versions too.

I want to do a bigger episode on handheld PC gaming.

I've not done my rounds with all of them yet, but if you're somehow in PR for one of these things, email me, easy at betteroffline.com.

And I'm looking forward to, on a larger level, doing more gaming stuff.

Gamers can be a little bit angry, and I'm sure someone's going to hear me say fuck Nintendo and get really upset.

But you know what?

Gaming industry needs to look at too.

But there are really positive things.

PC gaming rocks right now.

There are tons of fun games you can play, but also these handheld gaming, there's years of games that work on them them really, really well.

I mean, I play Madden 25 because it's like ASMR for me, but it's nice.

It works really well.

I love these things, and I think you will too.

So I really recommend if you can, I think like Best Buy has a lot of them.

Go and play with them, pick them up, feel them in your hands.

It's a very personal choice.

And yeah, buy that instead of a Nintendo Switch 2.

You don't need to play the latest version of Mario Kart.

Mario Kart has been the same goddamn game for years.

You know it, and so do I.

Anyway, that's gonna get me in trouble too, but give these things a go.

And yeah, here you go, a semi-positive monologue view for bloody ones.

Thanks for listening.

Be honest, how many tabs do you have open right now?

Too many?

Sounds like you need close all tabs from KQED, where I, Morgan Sung, Doom Scroll so you don't have to.

Every week, we scour the internet to bring you deep dives that explain how the digital world connects and divides us all.

Everyone's cooped up in their house.

I will talk to this robot.

If you're a truly engaged activist, the government already has data on you.

Driverless cars are going to mess up in ways that humans wouldn't.

Listen to Close All Tabs, wherever you get your podcasts.

Every business has an ambition.

PayPal Open is the platform designed to help you grow into yours with business loans so you can expand and access to hundreds of millions of PayPal customers worldwide.

And your customers can pay all the ways they want with PayPal, Venmo, Pay Later, and all major cards so you can focus on scaling up.

When it's time to get growing, there's one platform for all business, PayPal Open.

Grow today at paypalopen.com.

Loan subject to approval in available locations.

There's a lot going on in Hollywood.

How are you supposed to stay on top of it all?

Variety has the solution.

Take 20 minutes out of your day and listen to the new Daily Variety podcast for breaking entertainment news and expert perspectives.

Where do you see the business actually heading?

Featuring the iconic journalists of Variety and hosted by co-editor-in-chief Cynthia Littleton.

The only constant in Hollywood is change.

Open your free iHeartRadio app, search Daily Variety, and listen now.

Time for a sofa upgrade?

Visit washable sofas.com and discover Anibay, where designer style meets budget-friendly prices.

With sofas starting at $699, Anibay brings you the ultimate in furniture innovation with a modular design that allows you to rearrange your space effortlessly.

Perfect for both small and large spaces, Anibay is the only machine-washable sofa inside and out.

Say goodbye to stains and messes with liquid and stain-resistant fabrics that make cleaning easy.

Liquid Simply slides right off.

Designed for custom comfort, our high-resilience foam lets you choose between a sink-in feel or a supportive memory foam blend.

Plus, our pet-friendly stain-resistant fabrics ensure your sofa stays beautiful for years.

Don't compromise quality for price.

Visit washable sofas.com to upgrade your living space today with no risk returns and a 30-day money-back guarantee.

Get up to 60% off plus free shipping and free returns.

Shop now at washablesofas.com.

Offers are subject to change and certain restrictions may apply.

This is an iHeart podcast.