S31 E6: The diaries | The Banned Teacher

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This is a CBC podcast.

I'm getting a bit of help to start this episode.

Hi.

This is my daughter.

She knows all about my work, all about the rare times when adults cross the line with kids, issues around boundaries, consent.

I rattle on a bit about it.

Yes, you do.

This kid will be 16 later this year.

That's the same age as Anne-Marie Robinson, Jeannie McKay, and Jackie Short when they first had encounters with their music teacher.

Jackie Short.

We haven't met her yet, but we will soon.

She's another band member, Jeannie's friend.

Jackie kept a diary throughout high school, and she still has them all these years later.

This is where my daughter is going to help me out, reading those entries.

Wednesday, September 26, 1979.

Me, Jeannie, two other people with Mr.

Walker went to Swiss Chalet for dinner.

Mr.

Walker brought up the subject of my new relationship.

16-year-old Jackie Short wrote down just about everything that happened at school.

She was in the Markham District High School band.

It's in the greater Toronto area.

Same school, same band as Jeannie.

Same teacher.

October 2nd, 1979.

Mr.

Walker kissed me for my birthday.

She wrote in cursive, tidy, looping letters with little circles instead of dots at the end of sentences.

Thursday, November 15th, 1979.

Yesterday, Mr.

Walker told me that he told my boyfriend that he was damn lucky to have me and that if he hurts me, he'll kill him.

Jackie had red hair, tall and slim.

Mr.

Walker said to me today, I never noticed before, but you have great legs.

Was Zay ever embarrassed?

Her daily passages describe unedited teenage experiences and her real-time perceptions.

Friday, March 9th, 1980.

Mr.

Walker told me that he could easily get involved with me if I could handle it maturely and discreetly.

I'm afraid.

Jackie also witnessed something going on between her friend Rita and the teacher and her friend Jeannie.

And there were also two others.

One had brown hair, the other was a blonde.

And then she worried about her sister who would start music soon.

March 13th, 1980.

That's another thing.

Walker keeps hinting that if only he was younger, if only he wasn't a teacher.

And the scary thing is that we could probably date.

It was a dilemma for this teen.

She really liked her teacher.

But was it right?

Wednesday, May 14th, 1980.

Mr.

Walker is coming on strong.

He keeps saying stuff like, oh, you should hear about the dream I had about you.

Or sometimes.

It's really hard to hold back.

Some of the stuff he says really scares me, though.

Because Jackie short-figured it was already happening with the others.

Jackie is now in her late 50s.

And I'm just so happy that I, past Jackie, kept those diaries.

You know, because even now it's got dates and places and names.

The band teacher.

I'm Julie Irton.

This is season two of The Band Played On.

A music teacher taught in seven different schools.

He kissed, hugged, dated, and had sex with teen students.

Relationships he normalized but kept secret.

I feel angry, maybe more so, at the administration who who saw it going on.

I was probably well into my 30s before I really realized that he had actually knew what he was doing.

Like it wasn't a one-off kind of thing.

I think that's one of the many things I learned after finding other victims: how brazen everything was and how out in the open.

Anne-Marie Robinson is braced for this next step of her journey.

Episode 6: The Diaries.

Moments after Anne-Marie and I found Jeannie McKay, Jeannie told her husband.

Then she called her longtime friend, Jackie Short.

The next day, Jackie sent me a note.

Julie, I'm besties with Jeannie McKay.

I was not raped by Doug Walker, but it wasn't for lack of trying on his part.

I have many, many diary entries of details.

I would be more than happy to turn everything over to you and help in any way I can.

I can't believe I still have my 16-year-old self-diaries, but I do.

Until then, Jackie Short.

Soon after I get her note, we speak.

So let's start off.

Tell me your name.

Tell me where you live.

Where you're from.

Okay, Jackie Short.

I was born in Kingston, Ontario.

I grew up in Markham, Ontario.

I went to Markham District High School.

I was heavily involved in sports and music.

Jackie and Jeannie were friends in high school, but not the kind who share their deepest, darkest secrets.

Jeannie didn't share those with anyone.

In fact, she didn't get too close with anyone at Markham High, except her music teacher.

Jeannie was very, very closed off about the whole thing.

The two women are close now, and they have been for many years.

They're both in their late 50s.

Jackie's long dangling earrings peek below her short ginger hair.

From her first email, I can tell Jackie is a firecracker, quick wit, no filter, and still angry as hell.

I think he's a horrible person, and you know, I went into music despite him, not because of him.

Oh, yeah, Jacqueline Short is also a professional opera singer, a soprano.

This is her singing in The Rake's Progress by Stravinsky.

The CBC recorded it for Saturday afternoon at the opera several years ago.

She's performed internationally.

She also teaches at Western University in London, Ontario.

Not surprisingly, she was a favorite of the music teacher.

I did the choir and then I did the musical

and then I played in the band as well.

I had always been interested in music.

We were one of those families that sang in the car in four-part harmony.

And my dad played the guitar and sang in the barbershoppers for a long, long time.

And my mom sang in a kind of semi-professional choir.

Like Anne-Marie Robinson, Jackie Short chose the French horn.

It's a very hard instrument to play.

She met the music teacher in grade 10.

He started working at her school in January 1979, right after he left Anne-Marie's school.

He was an enthusiastic teacher.

He was sort of

charismatic.

He was very sort of wanted to be in with the kids.

Jeannie and Anne-Marie have both mentioned this already.

Jackie remembers he got close to girls.

It was my 16th birthday that he, yeah, he gave me a big kiss on the lips.

He'd have his arm around you a lot.

He would come up close.

You would sit on his lap.

Like it it was normalized as a kind of congenial, I don't know, brother, father figure, maybe not father, but until it became, until he was like kissing you on the lips.

And I also have a photo of him holding me and dipping me in a lot, in a big dance move, which I've seen that photo and others of kids and the music teacher at tables covered in wine glasses and beer bottles, raising a toast to the camera, big smiles.

We were 16 and

smoking and drinking and stuff like that.

She says while he acted like a kid, he also let them know who was in charge.

And then as time went on, he began to realize that he was prone to fits of anger.

He would yell, he would throw kids out of band, he would threaten to take them off trips.

So then I remember being thankful I was on the good side of that

because I was a very good student.

I was a decent musician, musician, I guess.

Jackie Short's diaries are a window into what was happening and how she was feeling.

Oh my god, it's horrifying to read what I stuff I wrote.

It's embarrassing for her now, but Jackie's words signal the conflict inside a maturing mind.

My next-door neighbor kept a diary, and I thought it was kind of cool.

And so I started keeping a diary.

It was one of those little brown ones with the teeny little key.

And I wrote in it in my little pencil.

But anyways, it was about boys I liked and how much I weighed and what I wore to school and what marks I got and

how my best friend was mad at me and

you know

just teenage stuff.

And then luckily I wrote a lot about the culture of the band and what was happening and how Walker would take us out for dinner and buy us all drinks and we were 15, 16, 17.

She has sent me pages and pages and at first glance it's cute.

And then I included a lot of these details about Walker.

Then it's disturbing.

March 14th, 1980.

Before the concerts, Walker called me over.

This is an entry from a band trip to the UK.

She was 16.

He explained that he was going to the country club tomorrow night with his billet, free drinks, food, etc., but he needs a date.

So he asked me if I wanted to accompany him and I said sure.

I just thought, well, he likes me better than anyone else.

What a guy.

But Jackie decided not to go with him after all.

We'll hear more about that in a bit.

Instead, he took another girl, Rita.

Jackie had noticed something was going on with her even before the trip.

So I noticed personally

that there was some sort of close relationship between them

and that they would leave or come back together at lunchtime

and

seemed to be inebriated, shiggy, and he sort of smelled of the alcohol.

But you're in grade 10, beginning of 11.

But yeah, it was very noticeable that he was with Rita and I saw him kissing Rita when we were on our band trip to England.

March 14th, still 1980.

It seems that for the past few nights, Walker has given Rita a kiss on on the lips good night.

I'm getting scared for her.

We hope there's nothing going on between Walker and Rita, although we're sure there is.

There was.

Sat down, put his arm around me, and then he said to me, I don't care what anybody thinks.

My name is Rita.

I was in grade 12 then, so I would have been 17.

Rita was a year older and a year ahead of Jeannie and Jackie at Markham District High School.

We went to England, and I remember him coming over and sat down beside me.

It was couches and stuff all over this place and kissed me in front of like all the rest of the band members that were there.

For decades after high school graduation, Rita had no contact with Jeannie or Jackie and she moved far away from Markham.

I live in British Columbia.

Rita lives in BC with her husband.

She works in the long-term care sector and she still sees Jeannie from time to time.

She's also in BC.

Rita is private, shy.

Her old friends remember a smart, pretty girl, a bit of a wallflower.

I was pretty quiet.

She now wears a page boy haircut and glasses.

Rita's asked me to only use her first name.

What happened between her and the music teacher is still painful.

It took Rita several months to respond to my invitation to chat.

More time passed before she decided to do an interview.

I realize these are not easy decisions.

Rita first met the teacher in 1979, a year before that fan trip to the UK where there were public displays of affection.

It had all started when Rita was 16.

You know, I mean I had not had a boyfriend or anything at that point.

So it was it was, you know, I guess I'd never felt like that before.

So

yeah, it made me feel special.

In our timeline, Rita comes after Anne-Marie and before Jeannie, at the same school as Jeannie.

All three women lost their virginity to their teacher.

The women now realize he was seeing both Rita and Jeannie at the same time.

I think that, you know, if we compared notes in any way, we would have figured it out.

And I was already suspecting.

Rita says he drove a wedge between her and Jeannie.

And he would tell me things about her, like really terrible things, and like to stay away from her.

And he did the same thing to her, told her terrible things, and to stay away from me.

Rita remembers how it all started.

He took me to a romantic dinner in a French restaurant in Toronto, and we went back to his house and ended up in his bed.

And he made me believe, too, that you know this was going to go somewhere, like that he wanted to live with me and things like that.

Anne-Marie Robinson recognizes the tactics all too well.

The talk of love and marriage was entirely a way to manipulate

and groom me and make me feel some sort of obligation towards him.

In the late 1970s and early 80s, the music teacher was having sexual encounters with teens, Anne-Marie, Rita, Jeannie, and others.

But he was also living with a woman, an adult, and she was a teacher.

Walker was a busy man.

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And then there was a wedding.

Jeannie McKay was there.

Well, he was getting married and he got a bunch of us to be

his

free help, I guess.

We all went to the wedding and then went back and

served drinks and served appetizers and picked up glasses and things.

We felt like we were part of the party

and we knew a bunch of the folks there.

At the music teacher's wedding, it was at his modest one and a half story home in Toronto.

Jackie Short was there too.

He invited a number of students to go down.

I think we were in grade 12.

I don't remember if any, I don't think any of the teachers from Markham High were at the wedding.

Yeah.

But we were sort of,

it just felt like a big family.

And we, you know, served alcohol, drank alcohol, and later, I didn't know this at the time, but later Jeannie told me the details of that evening for her.

We fooled around in the basement at his reception.

She and he were downstairs in the basement making out.

I guess I'm just shocked at how brazen everything was and how...

Anne-Marie has now heard all these stories a few times.

She's come to know Jeannie, Jackie, and Rita, but every new detail makes her more sad, disgusted.

I think that's one of the many things I learned after finding other victims is how out in the open it was and how

every time you talked to someone, everybody knew everything that was going on, but nobody did anything.

Teachers knew in the 70s that you don't invite students to serve alcohol at your wedding.

And then all kinds of other things happened there.

It was just an unbelievable situation and jackie short wrote it all in her diaries jackie sees maybe better than anyone the insidious nature of what went on and how it's wrongly interpreted i think a lot of the problem is that people won't see this as rape with genie and anne-marie because it wasn't violent but it didn't need to be violent because it was emotionally violent you know it was um like a drop of water on an ice cube it just slowly wore away at it right and and it so it wasn't a smash because it didn't need to be, that wasn't his MO.

So, um, that's what I think people think.

Oh, well, she wasn't raped, she consented.

Well, she didn't consent, she was slowly led to having sex with a man who was double her age and her teacher.

And she says she witnessed that pattern repeat.

Besides Jeannie and Rita, I also remember him being very

a similar vibe, was given off with I'm not naming the three other girls Jackie mentions.

Just similar, similar vibes.

These women did not consent to be part of the story, but I have verified there was similar, inappropriate sexual behavior with them and also with others.

Jeannie McKay is so glad Jackie has a record of these indiscretions.

Thanks to her amazing little diaries, her little high school diaries that she cringes at now.

You know, we have a bunch of proof of dates and things she said.

Jeannie didn't feel free to keep diaries, but Jackie didn't need to keep it secret.

And she knew that he was being

despicable.

When Jeannie went to the Ontario College of Teachers to report Walker, her friend's diaries became evidence.

The college found him guilty of professional misconduct in 2001.

Of course, that's when the teacher said what happened with Jeannie was a blip.

Except it turns out I'm at least blip four.

And who knows if there's going to be blip 10, 15, 20

god forbid yeah yep

i think his whole teaching career was blipity blip blip blip after another right jackie isn't sure why she held on to these journals for decades i have no idea why

and uh

yeah they're they're excellent evidence because even though because i'm not a so-called victim.

I do feel like this man has taken up more of my life than I need him to take up.

We've heard Jackie describe the teacher's kisses, hugs, and come-ons, but she says the sexual encounters with her teacher didn't go further than that.

Jeannie didn't have any boyfriends in high school.

I don't know if Anne-Marie did, but I always had a boyfriend pretty much throughout high school.

So maybe that was my luck.

I think I was pulled into that path and somehow ran the other way.

the stars did not align or they did align and I wasn't a victim.

I appreciate that you say that you weren't weren't a victim, and I know that it wasn't at all in the same way that Jeannie was, but kissing a student on the lips is actually sexual assault.

Well, don't we know that now?

A teacher propositioning a kid is also against the law, now.

That's according to Canada's criminal code.

There are laws against sexual assault, interference, and exploitation.

And buying students alcohol, dinner, special gifts, talking to kids about sex and their boyfriends would all be considered grooming behavior now.

These kinds of warnings are now featured in new training modules for teachers and coaches in some jurisdictions.

But was it not at least considered inappropriate, if not plain wrong, back then?

It seems 16-year-old Jackie certainly thought it was.

She says so in her diary.

Yeah.

Let's go back to that passage she wrote in March 1980.

I mentioned it earlier.

The teacher invited her to accompany him to an event.

At first, she's flattered.

Then the 16-year-old writes,

Then I sat down and thought, oh, what does this mean?

It's a date?

A rush of horror, sickness, and fear went through me like I can't describe.

I really didn't know what to think.

And in another passage, she and other students talked about what was going on with Rita.

March 16th, 1980.

We don't care if he walks with her, sits with her on the bus, but that's not the end of it.

He cuddles her and kisses her, and it's just not right.

No one respects Walker anymore because of Rita.

I was talking to Jitik and she said he could lose his job for this.

So kids knew something was wrong.

Where were the adults?

In high school, after two years of this kind of drama, Jackie didn't care if he did lose his job.

In the spring of 1982, the Markham District High School band was on another trip, this time in Germany.

Jackie decided to do more than tell her diary.

Well, I actually remember that conversation very, very well.

The band was on a boat tour on the Elbe River.

Some sort of river cruise.

At that time, the river still separated East and West Germany.

But all Jackie cared about was what she was witnessing between her friends and the music teacher.

An administrator from her school was a chaperone on the trip.

And I saw him standing by himself and I talked to him and I thought, well, this is my chance because this was late in the year.

I was going off to university.

I figured, well, this is the time for me to say something.

She blurted it all out.

And I told him, I said, I know that Doug Walker has been carrying on with students.

I probably at the time thought I knew for sure that he was involved with Jeannie, but we had never discussed it.

So I told him about Jeannie.

I told him about Rita.

I mentioned other girls that I thought.

I told him that he had propositioned me a couple of times.

That

I just spilled it.

I said he always was buying drinks for all the students.

She stopped so the administrator could react.

Did the old, well, oh,

well, yes, oh, I see.

Yeah.

That was his reaction.

And I guess we'll have to do something, you know, what do something about this.

And then there was, I was

shaking.

Like, I don't know if I was red or white.

You know what I mean?

Like, I don't know if I was heightened or drained.

But

at the end of it, I thought I felt very brave.

And I thought, oh my God, I finally did something.

And nothing was done.

And my sister was in the band.

And I remember thinking,

something needs to be done because I don't want my sister to be a victim.

And then nothing was done.

And that was horrifying.

How could nothing be done?

You know, shame on him.

Shame on Walker, but shame on that administrator.

I try phoning and emailing the former administrator.

No luck.

I even send him a letter by post.

No response so far.

And my questions and freedom of information requests to the school board have provided no answers.

The board's response on official letterhead says no records exist.

But we do know the music teacher left Markham High five years later.

Were you able to find out eventually why,

like who was the catalyst who got Walker out of Markham?

Don't know.

Yeah, it's a girl.

Maybe someone will come forward when all this hits a fan.

Maybe, maybe we'll get answers.

Why did he leave Markham High five years after Jackie Short blew the whistle?

And why did he move schools four more times after that?

Jeannie McKay has other concerns.

The fact that the administration knew,

Out and Out knew

anyone after me,

Markham High School was a failure at protecting kids.

The York School Board, a failure at protecting kids.

Yeah, so anyone that comes after me,

it's so sad.

But Jeannie's never been prouder of her bestie.

Jackie did the right thing when she was just a teen.

Jackie had the guts.

She's always been this really amazing, ballsy lady,

smart woman.

and she knew that it was tearing friendships apart and she knew it was wrong.

In the spring of 2022, I reached out to Doug Walker himself.

I was about to produce an investigative series for CBC.

My stories focused on what happened to Anne-Marie Robinson and Jeannie McKay in high school.

They hoped going public with me would prompt others to come forward.

Walker responded to my inquiry.

I get Anne-Marie and Jeannie on a video call and I fill them in about what their former teacher said.

Okay, so as you know, I got in touch with him first to see if he would talk to me and then he said that he thought about it.

He did some soul searching and he decided he wouldn't do an interview because he's been through enough already.

Really?

He's still avoiding responsibility.

Yeah, yeah.

So I sent him a series of questions, various allegations from the women, starting with the night in Belleville in 1977 when Anne-Marie says she was raped.

I ask about the many sexual encounters with both Anne-Marie and Jeannie in cars, hotel rooms, a music room, closet.

I ask him about propositioning and kissing Jackie.

I ask about Rita and two other girls at Markham High.

Okay, so now Julie, tell us what he did say.

This is the note I got last night, which I wasn't expecting quite so quickly because I only sent this to him yesterday afternoon.

Walker asked me not to publish his responses, but generally speaking, he insisted the encounters were consensual.

He contested some details and he didn't answer all my questions.

There is one part, he said, I could publish, an apology.

Quote, there are no excuses and no justification for my behavior.

I was irresponsible, immature, and arrogant.

I am so sorry to have involved these outstanding and courageous women in relationships which were inappropriate in all ways.

I understand the negative effect this has had on them.

Unquote.

It's nice that he's written that in words to you.

He has not apologized to me.

That is not an apology to me.

I don't consider that an apology.

I want to.

It's not taking responsibility.

Yeah, none of this

actually takes responsibility.

I'm not expecting an apology because it would have come years ago.

If it was real, it would be from his heart and out of nowhere.

I've been trying to find you for 14 years or whatever.

I am so sorry, right?

That's an apology.

This is not an apology.

He's not sorry that he hurt us.

He's sorry that he did it.

because he was going to get caught and he eventually knew he was going to get caught and that sort of democris has been hanging over his head and it's been hanging there for all these years.

It does not give us our childhood back.

It doesn't give us our virginity back.

It doesn't give us our

high school, healthy high school, joyful experience back.

It doesn't give us back the nights that we were awake with anguish or shame.

I don't, it's just a statement.

And I just don't care.

I don't want to be in touch with him.

I don't want his apology.

I don't want money from him.

I'm so over him.

My concern is my healthy life with my family, my new sister.

She means Anne-Marie.

And there is something that sister wants from the teacher.

Anne-Marie brushes the hair from her eyes.

I would love to know.

She's out of the shadows.

Her sister is with her.

She knows exactly what the teacher can do for all of them.

I would love him to systematically list all of these victims and I would like the school board to take whatever steps are reasonable to now have restitution for those victims, whether whatever kind of support.

I don't know what shape they're in.

I know this had such a profound impact on both Jeannie and I.

So I suspect that there's people in trouble and I haven't, we have no idea how many, but I think there's a lot.

The deputy minister is back.

Walker doesn't provide a list, but maybe he doesn't need to.

My initial stories about Anne-Marie and Jeannie go to air and online in the spring of 2022.

This is World Report.

Good morning.

It is Monday, May 9th from CBC News.

CBC uncovers a dark history of alleged sexual abuse involving an Ottawa man who taught music in the Toronto area.

The story is seen and heard across Canada.

The allegations date back to the 1970s and 80s.

Those coming forward say their cases were either missed.

He taught music for a quarter century in the Toronto area, and victims allege the crimes were missed, ignored, or minimized by school administrators, the military, and even the police.

The response is immediate.

I hear from former students, now men and women.

And I'm not the only one getting feedback.

I check in with Jeannie and Anne-Marie.

I feel great.

I mean, when it came out, I was like, it was kind of like a slow feeling of feeling good and a little bit trepidatious and all of that, but feeling good.

Oh my God.

Like, I went to bed thinking, that's it.

I don't have to think about them.

It's done.

I'm done.

And then in the morning, there's the, you're in the inbox and other people are in my inbox.

I read them some of the emails I received.

During those five years, I played the trumpet in multiple bands under the direction of Doug Walker.

I just read your article.

It left me reeling.

I was witness to the drinking and the sexual innuendo.

I was never comfortable around Mr.

Walker, and I believe he knew that.

I was not a victim of his abuse.

My heart breaks for those who were.

I am gutted.

Thank you for bringing these stories to light.

I hope more people come forward and those who let this happen are held accountable.

And then Jeannie reads us some Facebook posts from a group she's part of.

I remember him taking us to the Howard Johnson bar on Markham Road at the hotel.

And he took me to the hotel Lynn there once.

and this other gal i don't know her denise cable

she says i was told one time for a test i could either play the music piece or neck with him she says shocked i just stood there and began playing he used to take the students into the storage room to have us play our test but obviously there was another reason

wow

The full, full story has to keep coming up.

So what are you going to do now, Julie, with this?

I'm hoping that we hear from the Port Credit person.

I'm referring to the alleged punch at Port Credit Secondary School.

It's a story Anne-Marie has repeated since I met her.

Walker told her the father of a music student hit him.

The father alleged something had gone on between his daughter and the teacher.

It happened in Walker's first year of teaching.

But we don't even know if this story is true.

And then we're going to talk with our new girl tonight.

Another woman who alleges she was abused as a teen.

She said she wanted to talk to us, and she was so happy to know she wasn't the only one.

Anne-Marie was right.

There are other women out there, others they can help.

This new survivor also went to Markham High, where Jeannie, Jackie, and Rita went.

Her experience happened five years after Jackie told the administrator.

Jackie reported him after you, Jeannie.

And then this woman we're going to meet tonight, like it's unbelievable.

But then when I got that email this morning, it was so

just finding her, and she was so clear and articulate.

The email reads, I am the reason Doug Walker was transferred from MDHS in 1987.

I do not want my name published anywhere now.

However, despite my lifelong shame about this incident, I would be happy to talk further to anyone involved in this case.

Best regards.

Next time on the band Teacher.

Survivors from across the country meet up for the first time and newly found victims tell us their stories.

He said to me, you know, it wouldn't take much for me to lose control.

Sometimes it's hard for me to remember that I'm 39 years old and your teacher.

All he cared about was himself.

Like his whole reaction.

Yeah, his whole reaction was, well, what about my life?

What about my family?

Like no empathy, no sympathy.

The band teacher is investigated, reported, written, and hosted by me, Julie Irton.

Allison Cook is the story and script editor, producer, sound designer, and mixer.

Felice Chin is our executive producer and story editor.

Ev St.

Laurent is our legal advisor.

Thank you to Maggie for lending your voice for this episode.

Jennifer Chen, Amanda Pfeffer, and Jen White provided valuable production advice.

Special thanks to the folks at CBC Podcast for their support and the managing editor of CBC Ottawa is Drake Fenton.

If you want to binge the whole series, subscribe to CBC True Crime Premium on Apple Podcasts.

Just click on the link in the show description or binge listen for free by logging in to CBC Listen.

If you like this podcast, I have another original investigation that might interest you.

That's the band played on season one.

All episodes are available right now, wherever you get your podcasts.

If you or someone you know has been sexually abused, community resources can help.

Reach out to a trusted person, sexual assault center, or rape crisis center in your area.

For more CBC podcasts, go to cbc.ca slash podcasts.