What Men Look For In A Wife | Girls Gone Bible

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Teasing it with your fingers? Yeah, I can't have you with the flat hair.

Wait, look how full it is.

Wow.

Oh my god, what did you just do?

Wait, look for Circe.

Arrgh.

It looks good.

Wow, your mom is going to be so pleased.

She will be happy, huh? Wow? Why she here, Ariel? Okay I have this big crater on my forehead But that's okay, right? It's just a big boy That's okay, I don't care We have demonic drinks today I don't want to hear anything in the comments I know there's peace signs And there's yoga poses This is all we do by the way This is four drinks Four drinks Celery juice has been saving my gut Tell them, what happened? I don't know, it's just been a lifesaver for me You were feeling really really funky. I was going.
You're feeling funky in the stomach. I've been having a lot of stomach and gut issues.
And then the celery juice just helped. We go through so much as women.
We do. No one understands the hormones.
You know, we're trying to be good old women women of god and we want to just rip rip our faces off sometimes because we're so someone else's i was so emotional the past couple days and i'm like what is going on it's because my you're our hormones i'm so emotional too i cried on the way here i had a streak and i was like you you know, when I'm like trying to not cry and I'm

literally ruining my sweater because I'm just trying to get to the tears before. I was like, work it on something else.
You're not happy. We're okay.
What's up, Ar? What's up, Ange? Hi, guys. I'm Ange.
And I'm Ari. And this is Girls Gone Bible.
We are a faith-based podcast where we talk all things spirituality, mental health, relationships, specifically Jesus and the Bible. We love Jesus here.
Jesus is everything. Jesus saved our lives.
I can't take one step, one breath without Jesus. I make very bad decisions.
If it weren't for Jesus, I'd be under a bridge. My mom said to me, I had went back to Boston and she said, Ari, you know it's okay to take a couple minutes away from the Bible, right? Like, go enjoy your friends.
I go, okay. What about when your mom said, super early on in Ari's journey, she's like finding Jesus and everyone's like, this girl's crazy.
And then she and I, we start fasting together and you're going on a fast and your mom calls you and is like why is my kid fasting? We're like you can't eat why can't my kid eat? Jesus wants you to eat. I'm like mom enough but then you go you say and she's like what's the point why are you fasting? and you go mom I'm trying to get closer to God and she goes how much closer can you get to him? Give him a break.
You buff him all day. Listen, Ari and I.
What? What are you going to say? Ari and I are in our, like, we're in our godly era, like, godly woman era. We're in a godly era.
Yeah, we're in our godly woman era, which is a forever era. We get up at 5 and we pluck the chickens.
You know that girl on Instagram? I strive to be like, she wears the long skirts. Oh, ballerina farm? Yeah.
She is insane. That is going to be us.
Is it? I'll tell you what I'm not going to be doing. Making homemade bread.
Can you imagine me? I won't even eat it. I'll be making it all scared.
I want you guys to know, actually, my eating habits, I'm not even kidding. And this is not a joke.
For anyone wondering, I have had such breakthrough recently. Like, really really so much breakthrough there's been so much prayer that's got what what you're always skeptical i wish i had half of it no you don't i shouldn't say that uh well tell me about your breakthrough because i want to tell you about mine after let's Well, God is breaking off codependency, disordered eating.
He's breaking everything off of me. Pride.
I am in probably truly my most vulnerable era of my life. Actually, I feel stripped naked of like, you know what I was thinking this morning? I was thinking about pride and like, and I was just thinking about how people like pride looks like to people just being so arrogant and being so full of yourself.
But pride is actually like, I realized that most of my pride throughout my life was me choosing to have a narrative about a situation that would like cause the least amount of pain. Like if I was going through something instead of like facing the truth about it, which would probably leave me in like a vulnerable and painful like position, I would take a position of power and be of always like, I don't actually care.
Like I'd create a narrative where like, I could take a position of like, not actually caring. And it's just so funny that God is like, it's over.
You're never doing that again. Because now every situation I am in, I feel like I take almost like the lowest position of humility, which just leaves you completely open to just like uncomfortability and pain and I was just like thinking about how I've spent my whole life like with letting my like pride is just such a coping mechanism you know what I mean it's not even like someone wanting to be arrogant it's like you literally try to protect yourself with this thing I'm getting emotional it's unbelievable it's unbelievable that's what a breakthrough that is i am so tired of it isn't it great i'm so sorry okay that the christian walk is a grind it's a grind but it's teaching it's's so hard, but God is like, no, I'm raising you to be the best version of yourself.
Yeah. That's why.
The most honest version because the pride is like, it's fake. It's false.
You know how you say, you always say like you weren't always as open as you are now. Like you used to like hide your problems, hide how you were feeling, whatever.
And then all of a sudden one day it's as if you like can't not tell people what you're going through. That's where I'm at right now.
And it is so vulnerable for like my personality that I can't help it. But as soon as I talk to someone, I just like this is exactly what I'm feeling and going through.
And like I need to get it out and I need to talk about it. It's just crazy.
Isn't it the best feeling? How does that make you feel when you do it first before? Do you feel like it's like releasing sickness, right? Yeah. Yeah.
And I just feel a lot safer now. Safer, yeah.
Yeah. Of being like, I feel so much safer in my vulnerability.
It's because it's just honest. I've just realized in my relationship with God that the facade and the whatever and pushing things to the side and brushing them under the rug and being like, oh, I don't even care about that.
I don't even care about that. Like, it's not honest.
It's not real. So even though it's painful to have to like face your stuff and your issues, like it's authentic and it's honest.
Yeah. And you're noticing that people aren't going to leave you.
They're not going to abandon you. you they're actually here and it actually is the best thing because they're understanding and it brings you closer yeah right so true exactly yeah yeah for the longest time I think I was always like yeah you have to you it was always like I wonder where I learned it from it's just it was like trying to protect yourself yeah it all goes when you were just a kid yeah that's what it is taking a position of like no no i'm not i'm not i can't be vulnerable i can't be whatever you're trying to protect yourself yeah anyways therapy session therapy sesh with us every week huh it's crazy it's because we're going through it in real time what are you having having a breakthrough? You guys don't understand how much we go through.
Actually, you do understand. You do.
We tell you every day. We tell you everything.
You know I have these flashes when I'm in bed, when I'm on TikTok, and I see the most vulnerable clips of me, and I'm like, why didn't I take that out? I know. I love it.
No, my favorite is. No, no.
My favorite clip of myself ever is that one. And it was such a vulnerable.
It was the first time I ever talked about how I had like anxiety going out to dinner. Which, by the way, I don't have any more at all.
We laugh at this all the time. But can you believe that? I don't have any anxiety going out to dinner.
I don't have any anxiety after like having a bad meal. I don't.
Even if there's a little sauce on the fish. Even if, even if there's, it doesn't give me anxiety, but I still choose to take the sauce off, but no anxiety.
It's baby steps. And I feel less of an inclination.
Um, if I have an ice cream cone to then go on an 18 week fast. So there's like, There lot of breakthrough anyways that one uh clip of me that I'm like someone put this super dramatic song behind it and I'm like you know I am excited going out to dinner and then it's this horrifically like dramatic song and every time I see it I'm like people are probably like what is she talking about? What was mine? What do you think mine was? I have, I have...

Talking to squirrels.

Talking to squirrels.

I had to Google if I was

going to die of a broken heart.

I love that clip.

Oh my gosh. Okay, what's your breakthrough

this week?

This is nice.

My breakthrough this week

is... And I want to do a whole episode on this to understand like and I would preach this but I don't know if I fully believed it and that's something that I'm like wait a minute I was preaching this to people but I don't't know if I fully knew that from myself.

And I think that's why God is bringing me into this.

But just equipping up for hard seasons and knowing that you can't escape them and to buckle up and to say, okay, God, we're going into this. This is going to be isolating.
This is going to be hard. But let me really focus in and not give up and not sit in the sorrow and depression and let me fight through this so I can come out of this with what you're trying to teach me.
You just spoke to literally everything that I'm going through. That's crazy.
We have to do an episode on that. I want to do a whole episode on this.
Talk about it. What are you feeling? Is that where you feel you just weren't ready for? Just like, I'm just, I know I'm entering into a very specific season, a season where God is trying to teach me a lot and it's going to be really difficult.
There's going to be days, but before I just would just, I, one thing about me is like a lot of people can be really positive. I'm naturally not a super positive person.
I get into, I can get into a very deep hole if I, if I, you know what I mean? Like I can get into a really deep depression because that's what I watched growing up. And so that's what my mind is like wired to do.
And so just to not get in that deep hole and to fight through it, because there's gold at the end of it. If you allow God to come in and say, I'm bringing you through this, but we're going to get through it together.
You're not going to sit in the valley. We're going to walk through it together.
Just like when we were both in our dark valleys, look at what we look at who we are through it. So it's going to be incredible when we're out of this.
Yeah, we have to do a whole episode on it because so many people don't know how to navigate it. They think it's their fault.
They think they're being punished. And just understanding that you're going to go through.
That's what I swear in my relationship with God, I feel like because I have so many good seasons the second I get into a bad one I'm like oh here we go I'm everything's like the devil like the devil yeah and now I'm realizing yeah that's a good point like we have to go through these hard seasons we have to be uncomfortable it's where we grow you're so right it's like we preach it all day long and we know it's the truth. But the second you're in it, you forget and you forget that you're supposed to be learning.
Isn't that crazy? The whole point in everything we go through, we should be, we're learning a lot. We're changing and it's not always going to feel like this.
I know. And I had a moment too.
I was like, I'm preaching to people yet. I'm acting like I'm acting like this.
I'm like, what am I? So, but we're learning. It's we're all in this together.
We're all learning. That's what's so different about Girls Gone Bible.
At the end of the, I mean, we're, we're not preachers. We are two girls who have to navigate life, who we're like all in this thing together.
That's why we're such a close-knit family, all of us.

That's why we all relate to each other because we're all like kind of navigating this together.

So I needed you to say that so bad.

I feel like I just received a little something-something from that

because I forget too that just because you're uncomfortable,

just because like I'm going through just a season of both of us are just there's so much transition. There's so much change.
We feel uncomfortable. We it's like the hardest part is when everything is so good.
Yeah. But you're also going through so much.
It's like it's a catch 22. I was just saying this to my mom this morning.
Yeah. I was like you feel bad and it's just like I shouldn't this way.
And then you try to force yourself. And it's just exactly what I've been going through.
I don't even feel like we're filming right now. I know me neither.
Thank you, Jesus. It's so weird.
All right, guys, before we get into today's episode, we just want to announce once again that we are on the Girls Gone Bible live tour. We're going all around the country.
We've been to, I think, 16 cities already by the end of the year. I know it's crazy.
We have literally had the time of our lives with you guys. We've cried with you.
We've laughed with you. We've got to hug you.
We've got to pray over you guys. It's been everything being on tour.
The fact that we have this opportunity to be able to like share this journey with you guys on the podcast has been one incredible blessing but then to actually be able to be face to face with you guys has been just such a gift from God and it is you guys have no idea what it's like to be with you guys in person like I can't wait to meet you I can't believe we have this whole new round of cities. It is going to be, it just keeps growing.
Like each and every city is so special. How God shows up and moves in each city.
It's unbelievable. It's different every single time.
Every time. We love you so much and we can't wait to see you.
You can go to girlsgonebible.com slash tour and you can get your tickets. And then one more thing, we are on GGB plus, as a lot of you guys know, we're having so much fun.
It's basically like exclusive behind the scenes bonus episodes. I like to call them conversations because sometimes I go into the studio alone.
Sometimes Ari goes in by herself and we basically just talk to you guys like what we're feeling that day in that moment, what God is teaching us in that moment.

And it's just it's it's videos and it's me and Ari that you can't see anywhere else. And it's just like the most raw conversations.
Yeah. So you can go to girlsgonebible.com slash plus to join.
Today we're talking about, we're talking about, we want to call this episode what men look for in a wife. We put up a poll and we got all these replies from all you men, all you men who watch Girls Gone Bible, which is just the best thing in the world.
I love the guys so much. Me too.
I swear I'll always say it. Whenever we see the guys at the shows, I'm always like, you're such a real one.
Like, you're such a real one. You don't have to be here supporting us.
There's nothing that excites me more than seeing the guys in the crowd. I mean, and I'm not saying that.
Yeah, we're just like, oh, here we go. Ari's scoping.
Maybe I'll meet my husband at one of the GGB shows. Yeah, they're going to be very excited.
There's going to be a line down the street for Ari. No, we just, we wanted to read.
We've never read Proverbs 31. As you guys know, Proverbs 31 is basically all about, it talks about the character of a godly wife and what that looks like.
And we want to go through Proverbs 31. We want to read with you.
We want to just dive into it a little bit. And because I know women want to know how to be a godly wife and coming from two people who are not wives, we're not going to sit here and tell you how to be a wife based on experience, but we can just read the Bible with you and learn together.
And it's been a training period for the both of us because we desire to be wives. So this time in our singleness, this has been our goal is we want to be godly wives.
And so we've been in this training season to be that. Yeah.
And honestly, we all, like, even if you're a guy, you can learn from Proverbs 31. It's just, it's basically just a whole proverb about how to be a good, noble, virtuous person.
And then afterwards, we put up a poll and we asked you guys what you look for in a godly wife. And so we're going to read some of those.
We're going to say if we agree or if we think it's biblical or it might be a little controversial and we'll just have a conversation. And girls, you can learn and hear what guys want or look for in a wife.
And guys, you can learn what you even should be looking for in a wife. Yeah.
Let's get into it. Let's go.
Proverbs 31 verse 10. It says, a wife of noble character.
Who can find a virtuous and capable wife? She is more precious than rubies. Her husband can trust her and she will greatly enrich his life.
She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life. She finds wool and flax and busily spins it.
She is like a merchant's ship bringing her food from afar. She gets up before dawn to prepare breakfast for her household and plan the day's work for her servant girls.
She goes to inspect a field and buys it.

With her earnings, she plants a vineyard.

She is energetic and strong, a hard worker.

She makes sure her dealings are profitable.

Her lamp burns late into the night.

Her hands are busy spinning thread, her fingers twisting fiber.

She extends a helping hand to the poor and opens her arms to the needy.

She has no fear of winter for her household, for everyone has warm clothes.

She makes her own bedspreads.

That's something I got to work on.

She dresses in fine linen and purple gowns.

Her husband is well known at the city gates where he sits with the other civic leaders.

She makes belted linen garments and sashes to sell to the merchants. She is clothed with dignity and strength and she laughs without fear of the future.
When she speaks, her words are wise and she gives instructions with kindness. She carefully watches everything in her household and suffers nothing from laziness.
Her children stand and bless her. That's so cute.
Beauty does not last, but a woman who fears the Lord will be greatly praised.

Reward her for all she has done.

Let her deeds publicly declare her praise. I love this.
Let's go through from the beginning. Verse 11 says her husband can trust her.
She will greatly enrich his life. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life.
I think whenever I do get married, one thing that I want so badly is to do good to my husband and not harm. And I think like, if I think about just like me and past relationships, and you know, I've never been in a real true godly relationship.
I've never been in a relationship with like a, man who loves Jesus definitely more than he loves me. So my experience up until now is very worldly, but I know in the past, like, I can't say that I've always only brought good to the person that I'm with.
You know what I mean? And I think what's so beautiful about the season we're in of like complete and total healing and where God has taken us from dating our whole lives in the world to then like forcing us to be single and the best. And it's the best thing because he's like, I am not bringing you to the beautiful marriage that I have for you with all of this garbage.
Like there's so much you have to shed. And it's like the longer we were in the world acting up, like the longer, you know what I mean? Like it does, it's about time too.
Like we have to take enough time. And so, and I know for me, like I want to be somebody that my husband can trust that I am going to like prefer him and that I'm going to honor him and that I'm going to bring good to his life.
I'm not going to bring like complaints and baggage and, um, you know, just like all of my stuff. Like I want to be a person.
I want to be a heal holds person so that I can bring joy to my husband. And that doesn't mean you can't have a bad day, of course, but like, I just, I want to be someone who just brings good and that he can trust that I'm going to, he's going to come home to someone who will be good to him and do good to him and not because there are a lot of people and, you know, they do it out of insecurity and they do it out of brokenness where like your husband comes home and unfortunately you're like, have a laundry list of things that you want to, you know, get into it over.

Yeah.

You know?

And I think even like what we were talking about earlier, how God is breaking all this off of us. And that's why so many of us complain that we're in our single season.
Yeah. But really, it's the beauty.

It's nothing but pure beauty because the season of singleness is pruning us of building us into the Proverbs 31. Because I'll tell you, I wasn't a Proverbs 31 woman because I didn't fully know Jesus.
And when we don't know Jesus, we don't know ourselves. And we can't be the best version of ourselves if we aren't fully devoted to Jesus.
And someone that comes home after a long day and when we have patience and we're able to look at them in a place of love is only because of the grace that we have Jesus, because we fear the Lord. We have such respect for God.
We are in such awe of Him that every day we are devoted. We are in prayer.
We are striving to be like Jesus. We want to be good women of God.
And so He's teaching you through His Word and through His characteristics how to be a faithful woman, how to be trustworthy, how to be just a calm, good woman. And so that's what's been my journey of singleness is that I would have never been this woman had I not walked through my season of singleness.
A hundred percent. We have to.
We have to. If you're in a season of singleness, especially I just want to speak to the people who are like, you're like Ari and I, maybe you weren't always a Christian.
Maybe you didn't always date right. You didn't always date impurity.
You didn't always do things the way that God intended us to do them. There's a lot that has to be shed.
And like you could be someone, you know, there's a mystery to how God works. Sometimes people need to be single for a long time, some people less, but God wants to do something in your singleness and you have to be grateful for the fact that you're by yourself because there's some things that can only be healed in your singleness that you can't heal with another person in your face like this, distracting you and like kind of putting a bandaid over all the things that God is like, no, I need you alone so I could get to these things.
Otherwise, there's somebody in between us and I can't have that. Yeah.
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Biblical submission. We love it.
We have a whole episode on it. Go watch it.
I love the idea of submission. I love the idea of being fully submitted to a man under God's authority.
I can trust him because he's under God's authority. But this woman here, it literally says she's basically a manufacturer, importer, manager, realtor, farmer, stream sis, stream stress, upholsterer and a merchant, along with being an excellent wife and mother.
She is all these things. Obviously, you don't need to go and strive to be all of these things.
There's not enough time in the day for you to do that. But basically, I think the point of the writer even including all of this is to show that she works.
She works hard. It says that she is energetic and she's strong.
She's a hard worker. She makes sure that her dealings are profitable.
Like a working woman is a beautiful woman. A non-working woman is a beautiful woman.
Whatever God has for you in that season in your life, like being a mom, by the way, hardest job in the world. Don't ever think that you don't have a job if you're a mom because you have the hardest and most important job raising the next generation.
But yeah, so you don't have to be this like, you know, making bread at home all day long. If you want that, if that's your life, that's beautiful too.
But like the Proverbs 31 woman, she works and she makes profits while she's at it that's right she extends a helping hand to the poor and opens her arms to the needy oh this is my favorite because i live by this um just it goes back to your character of being a servant you serve god by serving your family And a servant spirit goes so much further than a selfish spirit. When you have a woman who serves you, who is there for you, who is selfless, that is what everybody should be looking for.
Find a woman who is so selfless that no matter what, she will be there. She's not just going to get up and leave.
Find a woman who's a servant to your family, who's a servant to you. Because at the end of the day, as you guys grow old and something happens, you're going to need someone who served you, who's selfless, who's going to serve you in these times of distress because life gets so difficult and hard.
So find that woman, not who plays games, that's selfish and looking out for herself, who's a servant to you. And see, you know what I always say? See how somebody is to other people.
How does somebody always look at how when you're going on a date and stuff, how they're acting to other people. That's such a good point.
Even like to waiters and things like that. Are they serving others? Are they selfless? A selfless heart is the first thing that you should be looking for in a woman.
And if you are someone who's sitting there being like, man, I feel a little selfish in my heart, that's okay. We all go through these seasons of selfishness.
But that's why when you start your relationship with Jesus, like me and Angela always talk about how he is just breaking things off of us. One of the first things he strips from you is selfishness.
And he just transforms you into the greatest version of yourself. Like the Bible says, do not conform to the patterns of this world.
Choose to be a servant. Don't be selfish.
Be a servant like how Jesus was. Selfishness really only gets you so far.
And like Ari said, it is the biggest lie ever. It's just the biggest lie.
It's the biggest lie. And like how we talked about in the beginning of this episode about how all of these things like pride and selfishness, like it's all it it's so sad because it comes from brokenness and it comes because we think to protect ourselves, this is what we should do.
This is how we should behave. But then you realize there's actually so much safety and so much freedom in doing the opposite of what the world tells you to do and taking a position of servanthood and saying, yes, everything in me wants to have control and power and blah, blah, blah, and whatever.
But then you realize when you humble yourself down to a servant, you're like, there's so much more freedom in this. There's so much less of the risk of like at any moment I can lose power, I can lose control because you're already a servant.
So there's nowhere you can go.

Like, it's just, it's the best thing you can do. It says she's clothed with strength and dignity.
She laughs without fear of the future, which I believe means, you know, she is not a woman who is so anxious about the future. And listen, if you are, it's totally okay.
I am sometimes arguing, like, we all, we can't be Proverbs 31 all the time, forever. Like, you know, we're gonna, this is what we strive to be.
And we might not, you know, be perfect at it all the time. But she also says when she speaks, her words are wise, and she gives instructions with kindness.
So I hear she has strength and she has dignity, two things that you can ask God for. Strength is so important as a woman.
We've got to be strong. We are the backbone of so many things.
We are the foundation of so many things. Strength is found in Jesus.
The closer you are to Jesus, the more strength that you'll have to pull on when your husband needs you, when your kids need you, when turmoil is happening. And she laughs without fear of the future.
I want to be a woman who, yes, of course, I'm going to experience anxiety sometimes, but I strive to be a woman who trusts in God so much that I don't have to fear the future all the time. Where fear arises, I can immediately combat it with my faith that Jesus is who he says he is.
He's in it with me. He's doing what he needs to do.
And he's orchestrating everything and he'll never abandon us. And so if things don't look great, he's still doing something.
What I get from that is when she says, when she speaks, her words are wise. Now, I know I keep going back to the Bible, but from how I was before to now, the reason why godly women are so important, because unless you're speaking everything from the truth of the word, then it's just not wise.
Yes. So for a woman to hold you down, it must be biblical because anything aside from that is just not the truth.

And so, yeah, when she speaks words of wisdom wise, it's you need someone who will hold you down that when you are in a hard time, when you need advice, when all these problems and trials arrive, she'll be able to combat that with the truth because she is so rooted in the word.

And so you need somebody to hold you down that knows the word, that knows God, that has such respect for the Lord that no matter what, she's going to come back to you and say, hey, but no, look at this. Other than that, it's dead.
It's dead and it's scary. If you don't know Jesus, I don't like it's wisdom.
Jesus is wisdom. Jesus is wisdom.
The word is wisdom. You can't have wisdom when you don't know Jesus.
You can have worldly wisdom and that can get you so far, but that's not eternal wisdom. That's not integral wisdom.
That's not wisdom. That's not kingdom wisdom.
And so I just know the women that I know have in my life, like especially mentors, the women who really know Jesus are the wisest women. And it's as if like they have the ability to speak into any situation and just immediately get you out of it because wisdom just flows from their mouth because God is speaking that wisdom to them.
Wisdom will naturally flow from your mouth when you have Jesus and when you have the Holy Spirit. And wisdom is one of my most important things that I pray for.
Pray for wisdom every single day. Jesus, more wisdom.
Increase wisdom. I want more wisdom.
And it's all in his word. And if you have to take two to three hours, get up at 5 a.m.
and get in the wisdom because all the wisdom is right here in his word. If you're someone who's just dealing with a heartbreak and your partner didn't really fully know Jesus, it's okay.
Let it go. Anybody who you're meant to be with needs to understand who Jesus is.
Yeah. I just think about, isn't it so interesting? And thank you, Jesus.
Once you finally enter into a relationship with Jesus, you begin to realize every relationship, bless, God bless, I love them, bless them, good people, good men, nothing bad to say ever. But something clicks where you're like, how could I ever be sad about a relationship that wasn't built on Jesus? I know.
For what? I know. And then you see, you're like, thank God he took me away from that relationship.
You have to be so rooted in Jesus to last in this life. I swear.
Or else you're like, you're like barely hanging on. You're like living, but not really living.
And there's such an attack on men in general of like just there's too much temptation for men.

I know.

You know what I mean?

Temptation to not even just with other women, that too for for sure but temptation to like be with the boys temptation to you know care about money temptation to just care about all the wrong things that if you're not rooted in jesus it's gonna be so almost impossible to have a relationship of integrity yeah i'll always have one foot in one foot out always always because it's too too hard marriage is too hard i say it all the time i don't know how people have relationships without jesus how can you be with someone for 50 60 years where like naturally like and i'm gonna be honest you begin to like hate someone if you're with them you're sleeping in the same bed you're together all day for 60 years how can you even stand that person i know if not for the holy spirit between you right you know being covered in prayer coming together i know it's it i don't understand it i know like tragedy tears people apart if you're in a situation i don't even know why we're going here but if you're in a situation where like you were either in a marriage or in a relationship and it failed because of life, because of tragedy, because things happen, I want you to know that you're not a failure. It really is like if you don't have Jesus, it is close to impossible.
And I will always stand by that because the honeymoon stage ends and there's got to be a third person in the marriage that is sustaining you because you simply cannot ride the wave of a honeymoon stage forever and then after that what will sustain your relationship okay so tell me has summer really done a number on your hair i love fall and winter so much but the only thing that I struggle with is how dry my hair and skin get. Living in California on top of it does not help.
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We're not meant to be here and just barely be able to get through. No, so true.
We're supposed to thrive. You're supposed to thrive.
This is beauty. Life is beauty.
And we can't even see that because everything is a struggle, which we do. We have struggles and hardships, but we're like anchored.
When you have Jesus, you're anchored. You have peace.
You just, it's beautiful. You have clarity.
Yes. You can see clearly.
You can see your partner clearly. I feel like obviously we're not married.
We've been in relationships. We've been in long-term relationships.
Things happen in relationships where you begin to, especially in marriage, again, not married, but I know this to be true. Like the devil hates marriage more than anything.
Marriage is a perfect prophetic picture of our relationship with Jesus. Jesus is the groom, the church is the bride, and he then created marriage to like perfectly exemplify our relationship with him.
It's the closest covenant, the closest thing we have on this side of eternity to our relationship with God. And it's so important to him.
That's why Jesus, God loves marriage more than anything. That's why the devil hates it more than anything.
And that's why the divorce rate, yes, is probably more than 50% at this point because it's so hard to have a lasting marriage without Jesus. It's so, so hard.
And the devil will do everything in his power to get you married and then to rip it away from you or to not even let you get married in the first place. I know people who – I know engagements that fail all the time.
It's like the devil will – you know, it's like six, seven, eight years of being together. That's what it is.
Finally you're going to get engaged. Finally you're going to get married.
And then at the very last second he rips it away. So there's so much pain and so much brokenness.
And you're this close to entering into a covenant that actually represents our relationship with Jesus. And then he rips it away at the last second.
You have to go, you start over again, and it keeps happening. He loves it.
The devil absolutely loves it. This is so cute.
Verse 28 says, her children stand and bless her. Her husband praises her.
There are many virtuous and capable women in the world, but you surpass them all. I pray that one day my husband says, there are many virtuous and capable women in the world, because there are.
There are beautiful women in the world. There are amazing women.
There are talented women. There are whatever women.
And we're not going to negate the fact that there are so many great people, great women, beautiful women in the world, but you surpass them all. I pray that that's what he says when he looks at me, that no matter how many incredible women there are in the world, and by the way, that is a real good, good, good godly man, somebody who has eyes to see, and you're not blind to it.
You're not blind to beauty. You're not blind to other women being attractive, but you know that you know that you know that it is nothing.
Nobody surpasses your wife, Not because she is the best, but because she's yours. Jesus looks at us.
We should look at our spouses the way that Jesus looks at us. We are literally the apple of his eye.
We are each individually his favorite. And your wife, your husband should be your favorite.
And not because, again, they're the best in the world, but because they're yours. They're yours to protect.
They're yours to love. And you should take pride in being like, this one's mine.
I'm going to protect them for the rest of my life. I'm going to care for them.
I'm going to love them. And they're mine.
And I have so much like pride, good pride in the sense that I'm not even going to let another man or woman even think that they have a chance. So let's go through this real quick.
A woman who fears the Lord. So a woman who fears the Lord is in such awe of the Lord.
She has such a deep respect. She loves him so much.
That's how I feel every single day. My relationship with Jesus didn't start until I started having reverence for him.
Until I saw the love of God caused me to want to live and glorify him every day. The love of God made me want to be faithful, made me want to be honest, made me want to turn from everything I knew.
At any point, take everything away from me because I want to live every day for you. I want you to strip me of everything because I want to be an image of you.
I want to glorify you for the rest of my life. He didn't care about outward appearance.
He didn't care about the shiny good things. He didn't have, he didn't care about authority.
He was a servant. He was kind.
He was faithful. And when I learned about his character, I said, I want to be like this.
Humble me. And when I think of a partner, I want someone like that.
I want someone who looks at the image of Jesus and says, that's what I want to be like. A woman who fears the Lord, she's separated to God.
She's not

looking for the validation of others. She's looking for a well done from Jesus.
And, you know, beauty can be alluring, but that is not going to take care of your kids and your family. And society today, we're looking for the most beautiful or the shiniest toy, and that is not going to be sustainable.
So a woman who fears the Lord, man, has been the greatest gift that I've gotten to just grow into that woman. Yeah.
Because without Jesus, you are selfish. You are prideful.
And it's not that we mean to be these things, but when we don't have Jesus, we're living in our flesh. So we don't know any better.
And that's only by walking by the Spirit and having Jesus in your life. Take it off so I can't drop it.
Take off the mic. Now, can I go back really quick what you said about things may look a certain way? I think like we are plagued by the idea that whoever we choose as our spouse has to be somebody.
They have to look like something. They have to not physically because attraction is important.
And I'm sorry, but no Christian or person is going to tell me that like you shouldn't be you'll grow an attraction could in attraction. Could be true.
Or that, like, you don't need to be attracted to—like, I don't agree with it. You have to, you know, be intimate with that person for the rest of your life.
That's right. And I am a full believer that you should be attracted to the person you marry.
Yeah. But when things look—I think—and even, like, I remember when I was—before I knew Jesus, I did look at things like, what is this person like socially? What is this person like status wise? What can he bring to the table that way? Whatever, like we all do it.
And then as soon as I started following Jesus, I go, oh my gosh, no, no, no. Does that man wake up to spend time with Jesus? Because I don't care about anything else.
He doesn't need to be somebody. He doesn't need to have this or do that.
Like he's got to have a little ambition for sure. He's got to like, you know, get a good on a few business.
He's got to have a job and that's okay. And you are allowed to want a man with a job.
And, but like, you know what I mean? And so, but we as a society and as a generation, we look at like, what will I gain from this person or what will this look like to the outside world? And I'm just here to encourage you that would you throw that in the garbage and look at that person's heart and look at that person's character, what he does or where he's from or who his family is or whatever, whatever. None of it matters.
None of it matters. Like Ari said, it can't raise your kids.
It can't help you when you're sick. It can't take care of you when you're old.
None of it matters. And this part about charm is deceptive.
Beauty does not last, but a woman who fears the Lord will be greatly praised. Fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, according to scripture.
To be wise, you have to fear God. For me, I've always had the same brain.
I've always been the same Angela. I've always operated in the same way.
And I can't believe I literally, I look back and I'm like, I had no wisdom before I feared God. None.
And I would ask God for wisdom when I first started following Jesus. And I loved Jesus with my whole heart, but I did not fear him.
I was still doing this, that, and the other. I would ask him for wisdom, but I was not getting it because for me to have wisdom, to make the right decisions, to behave the right way, to think the right way, to do all things in the right way, which is wisdom, it starts with me fearing God because when you fear God, it affects everything about you, how you think, how you act, how you talk.
And so for me, I had no wisdom before I feared him. And then I want to talk to people who like, if you're somebody, a man or a woman who, who you know you fear being cheated on or you fear being left or you fear betrayal or you fear someone doing something behind your back I want you to know one thing a person who truly truly fears God will not do something wrong behind your back because people who fear God do the right thing when nobody's watching I know for me if, if I'm in a relationship, like, yes, I have good morals and compassion and I care and I will do the right thing when no one's watching.
However, there's something different about when you fear God, because I know that even if nobody ever sees this, if this never goes into the light, if nobody ever catches me, God saw it. And I tremble with fear about that.
And that's probably the most important thing about fearing the Lord is that we're not going to be doing things outside of this world. Because, yeah, that's what it is.
He doesn't let you get away with anything. The fear of God doesn't let you get away with anything.
Like, even for me, obviously, I'm not out here, like, cheating cheating on boyfriends but even the tiniest things like in a friendship or in a relationship i'll feel a tug of like that was prideful that was not very nice you're her and you're scared and so you're taking a position of whatever you don't get away with you don't get away with anything and that's fear and that's why woman who fears the Lord, it's the most important thing because she'll do good. That's right.
She'll act right. You can trust her.
If a woman fears God truly, you can trust her. And that's it.
Yeah. That's why that is it right there.
Yeah. You can trust her.
You can trust her. You can trust her heart.
You can trust she'll do the right thing. She fears God.
So if a woman fears you, that can only get you so far. You know, you want her to fear God because then everything she does has God talking in her ear, being like, that's not okay.
You shouldn't do that. That's not okay.
You can trust somebody's heart when they really fear God. That's fine.
Isn't it crazy how we don't get away with anything? Do you understand? The littlest thing. I'm like, oh, okay, that was wrong.
Okay. Oh, well, here, why am I putting my leg up? Here's the thing.
You know what I realized? All this time, we thought we were fighting them devils. We were getting over alcoholism, anxiety, broken heart, OCD.
And then we start having to lay down sin. We're laying down the big, big sins, everything.
And then all of a sudden, you think you're good. You think you're set.
And then God's like, thank God we got the easy work out of the way. Now let's get to the little like deeply rooted sin and issues in your heart, like the pride, like the whatever, all the things.
And let's get to every single one. And that's actually so much harder than laying down the big sin.
And I was so excited to live a life of pure, like, I'm good. I'm pure.
There's nothing wrong with me. And then he's like, this is actually the hard part now.
I know. It's crazy.
I can't believe it. I'm sorry.
I'm so tired. It's a beautiful thing.
It is. have that same that same thought of like god is real yeah yeah yeah yeah oh no you see it so easily in other people's lives because sometimes you're so in it you're like i don't like how this is feeling or whatever yeah um so should we read some of the things that people sent in yeah so the the the things aren't um i want a sip of this so bad but's going to get blueberries in my teeth.
Don't look at the yoga poses. We can just say she's praying.
She's throwing up in our father. Our father.
Who art in heaven. Who art in heaven.
Hallowed be thy, hallowed be thy name.

Thy kingdom come.

Thy will be done.

On earth.

As it is in heaven.

Oh, okay.

You just want a direction.

Woman of God.

Fear the Lord.

Okay.

Okay, ladies and gentlemen, the votes are in. And and everybody we had all these men write in what they want in a woman someone said i mean everyone said the same thing a lover of jesus and i would agree with you guys um someone said the ability to truly trust me yeah a man wants to trusted.
Yeah. And I totally understand that.
Go ahead. Men do want to feel fully trusted.
They want to feel like, you know, they have a woman who trusts in their leadership. There's nothing better for a man and his confidence and his leadership than to have a woman who speaks life and says, I am so proud of you.
I trust you. I have confidence in you and I have confidence in your decision making.
There is nothing better for a man ever. I know the second we start and it's so hard because if you really don't trust your man, that's such a tough position to be in.
And it's a really tough position to take where you're like, okay, I don't know if I fully trust him him but I'm going to speak to him like I do so that he becomes a man that I can trust but I just know that the second we start being super overly critical you destroy somebody's confidence like that you destroy it men need respect and trust and the minute we start nagging all the time It's like a lot of the times we and I don't know you could be I I feel like I'm sounding so preachy but I just I've been in worldly relationships and now where I am with with Jesus when you are so devoted to Jesus because when we don't when we're when we don't have Jesus and we're in a relationship we don't anything. You don't trust yourself.
You don't trust the person. You're always on edge.
You don't feel good. You're like, it's chaos all right here.
And so your world is just untrustworthy because how can you trust anything if you're relying on your own self and strength? And so when you get into relationship with Jesus, there is a calmness and a peace and a trust that you trust Jesus. And so everything else just flows.
And you know that if something isn't right, you're going to have the discernment and you're going to be like, okay, this isn't right. I'm going to leave.
You're not going to compromise. Women who fear the Lord, we do not compromise.
Somebody said what they look for in a wife or what they would look for is a sound mind to guide his heart. And I love even on the topic of like submission and trusting your partner, trusting the husband, trusting your man.
Like we are totally as biblical, you know, women, godly women, we take a position of submission to our husbands. However, they, I will never, like when I get married, I can't wait to enter into like a union where me and my husband begin to make decisions together based off what we feel like God is speaking to both of us.
I've heard married couples both like basically having God dreams the same night, wake up in the morning, talk about it, and it be confirmation to what they've been talking about. And like God speaks through couples.
And if you work together, and I've heard so many men be like, yeah, I make all the decisions. I have the money.
I have the job. But I don't make one decision without consulting my wife first because she has a perspective that I don't have.
She's my eyes that watch my back because I'm looking this way. I can't see that way.
And this person said a sound mind to guide his heart. And so if we have a sound mind, which is just basically us being calm and peaceful and clear and having vision and seeing clearly and seeing rationally, we can see things that will guide our husband and help him make decisions.
And it's like the most beautiful thing in the world. Of course, men should look for a wife who knows God, hears God, senses God, who takes

direction from God because she then can help you and show you things that you can't see throughout your marriage and when you're making decisions. Someone says, a wife who prays instead of nags.
Oh, yes. Yeah.
So important. Yeah.
You do that with everything in life. we have prayer is the lifeline to our life and if people could only understand that the only thing that I'll say is this has been such a crazy like even in my own life of not even just in relationships even with friends I went through a period we talked about this the other day I through a period after I got like super saved, where so many people that I knew weren't.
And I developed this kind of God complex where I thought I needed to save everyone. I thought I needed to tell people how to be and I know the Bible, so I need to blah, blah, blah.
And God like so released me from that, that of course I still speak truth to people but I have I feel no desire no need to try to change somebody I feel no need to criticize someone into doing better I literally sometimes won't say a word and I'll go and I'll pray for them and it's so much more effective and when you're the one thing that we all have to realize is that when you're so close to somebody, they probably won't hear it from you. A hundred percent.
I go through it all the time in my family. In my family, in my relationships, in very close friendships.
And I've realized that I almost think the best thing we can do is say, God, I pray that this person will either open their eyes and realize this, or will you send them someone who will get it into their head? Exactly. Because I can't tell them.
They won't take it from me. And you get nothing when you nag men.
I'm sorry to tell you. They don't care.
They don't want to hear it. They don't want to hear it.
Just in one ear, out the other. They don't want to hear our nagging.
All it sounds like is like, blah, blah, blah. Stop talking.
Unfortunately, that's just how it is. Especially if it's like your husband, the best thing you can do is pray.
Just keep praying. Do not think for a second that you can have more of an impact on that person than God himself can.
God can do things that are so much better than anything you can do. And then you're not the bad guy in the situation.
Because if you're sitting there trying to talk to someone all day and tell them something, they're not even listening anyways. What do you think about this yeah a girl said my husband said put our family first it's us before your work or goals

say it again um this girl's husband she asked her husband and he said what he looks for in

a godly wife is that the woman would put their family first, that it's us before your worker goals. Absolutely.
Love it. A hundred percent.
A hundred percent. What do you think? Yeah.
A hundred percent. A hundred percent.
Without a doubt. Of course.
Of course. That's no question.
But there is, I will say one thing. Yes.
A thousand percent. Are you talking about a woman or a man? That a woman puts the family first.
Oh, yeah, of course. Yeah.
And the men, too. You better put your family first.
Like, I don't care what. Yeah.
But I will say this, that, you know, for me as a, for us as women, we love to have purpose. Yeah.
And we love. It's just something we love.
We strive. We love it.
And so, yes, you put your family first. But there is nothing wrong with wanting something and having a job or a goal or a purpose and just having that for yourself.

Exactly.

I'm picturing our screaming kids sitting right here.

We're going to have eight nannies.

Are you guys going to still watch us if we have two kids sitting next to us,

two little bratty kids?

They're going to be such brats with bows.

I'm going to be yelling at mine in my Boston accent.

My mom's going to be here in Albania.

And I'm not even taking care of them.

I'm done.

What did I tell you?

Cut it out.

And I'm not kidding.

My mom is going to be sitting here.

Oh, gosh.

You guys are my kids.

I'm your guys' kids.

Literally, you guys take care of us.

Well, ladies and gentlemen, I hope you guys enjoyed this episode.

What did we talk about?

Two single girls talking how to be a godly wife.

Never been married.

Hey, we know a little something about something.

What?

Nothing.

I don't know.

Do we know anything?

Do we know anything?

I can't wait until we have 18 screaming kids and we are losing our minds.

The only one who's going to have 18 screaming kids is you. I am not having 18 kids.
Three. And you'll have three.
No, you're going to have. I'm not going to have three kids.
You're going to have two. You're going to adopt one.
You're going to have the other one. Yeah, I think, guys, I think adopting might be in my cards.
I know it is. You do? I know it is.
You have such a, you know, that spirit. Spirit.

I'm a servant.

I'm a servant.

I'm a three on the Enneagram.

Sorry, everybody.

I'm a two.

I'm a two on the Enneagram.

When Ari stops to help every single person, I'm like, yep, we get it.

You're a two.

I know, but I got to go.

I'm like, I'm carrying a suitcase. You're like, cool.

I'm giving this guy my money.

Oh, actually, I gave him my entire wallet and my life savings.

I also invited him over for dinner.

You're going to get us killed one day.

I'm going to get us killed.

Remember I asked the guy if we could give him a ride and he had a knife in his pocket?

Yeah, no, that was actually the worst.

No, you made a stop on the side of the road.

Oh, you can't fake that phone call.

I don't know if we can fake that phone call. What do you want to say? You have a script? God, we used to be so funny.
Are we still funny? Go ahead. Are we still funny? No, we're fighting devils all day.
What was you guys... Okay, can I ask you guys something? Yeah.
What was your favorite blooper of us? Was it when I...

Jehovah Driver.

When I called Jehovah Driver, when...

No, my favorite blooper was when you said that you were a scripture battle.

I used to be a nightmare with the scripture.

Hey, everybody, listen to all the scripture that I know.

I was in the middle of her in this pastor.

And he starts telling us his testimony about when he started reading John.

And then I start reading John 1.1.

In the beginning was the word.

He's the light of all mankind.

I said, hey, that's mine.

Yeah, he was the light of the word. And the word said the word he was the light of the word and the word said the word and the word was god and the word is with god and the word and i'm in the middle and i'm like someone called it the eight mile of scripture i that was the funniest thing you've ever said what do you said a lot of funny things what do you guys want us to wear do you to wear? Should we all get dressed up for Christmas? Yeah.
Are we wearing bows? Bows. Bows! Oh, yeah, I love bows.
Are we a little ugly? Sometimes.

My mom is the most...

Let me know.

If you're Eastern European, tell me if your parents on their deathbed would tell you,

hey, fix your eyebrows.

That's like how Eastern Europe parents are.

They're so like...

They're just so honest.

Read in the comments the craziest thing. You're European parents said or your East Coast mother said.
Yeah, what is your East Coast? You screw him with my kid? You screw him with my kid? Did you pack your underwear? Is screwing a swear? I don't know, baby. I think we can say screwing.
I think we're okay. I think Jesus has beer for things to worry about.
I can't say screwing. I'm living in my bubble.

Get out of my bubble.

Oh, you're resisting my anointing.

Ari and I went through a period of such religious OCV.

I was going to cut everyone off in my life.

We're cutting off all of our...

You told me to.

You had me a long time.

I'm second guessing everyone in my life.

Everyone's resisting our anointing. I'm done.
I'm not. Get away.
Get away from my anointing. Get out.
I can't say screw it. We love you.
I really hope you enjoyed this episode. I don't know what we talked about.
I hope you had a good time. Proverbs 31.
Let's all be good women. Fear the Lord.
Do the right thing.

Don't take anyone's you know what.

Yeah.

Don't.

Don't take a you know what.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Be a good woman.

Be a good man, please.

Please.

For the love of God, we need good men.

For the love of all things holy.

Tell them, baby.

Go ahead.

Look, I'm playing the tiniest violin in the world. Okay, please, bless him.
We have to bless him. Come on, give me that.
You've never played that? I used to do that. Come on.
Okay. We love you so, so much.

May the Lord bless you and keep you.

May he make his face shine upon you and be gracious to you.

May he turn his face towards you and give you peace.

We love you.

We love you.