Paradise for Gentlemen

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All right.

This is Anma 76.

The last one we were at Lamppost Coffee.

We're talking about

third wave coffee.

We talked about early voting, malls around Austin, movies of the Cheesecake Factory, having a tale, Madam Webb.

When are we going to get to fourth wave?

It's the year 2024.

I'm sick of third wave coffee.

It's been around since the 90s.

I want fourth wave coffee.

Do you think that there could be fourth wave ska?

Is there fourth wave ska?

Do you know?

It feels like there's probably fourth wave ska, right?

I would assume so.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I think so.

I I think Scott Punk was, or like, yeah, Scott Punk was like fourth wave, right?

Yeah.

I don't care.

Third wave was still like scavuvied in the epitodes and shit.

That was true.

So you're saying we're in the scavoovy era of coffee still, and I'm not for it.

We got to get to fourth wave.

I guess scavuvi may be more popular.

Who cares?

Call Bruce Green.

I don't give a shit.

I like how he's the one who dove into it and got mad at himself or like just mad at him.

I'm kind of annoyed thinking about it.

Like there's some knowledge and memories you start to unlock and you're like, I don't want to go back through this.

I survived Scott.

I don't need to go back through Scott.

Survived Ska.

We all did.

Uh-huh.

So this was, this is unusual.

We're at Merritt Coffee down off of what, like West and third, West and Fourth.

Yeah.

Coast to Seahome.

And this, we've done what you said, this is episode 76.

This is the first time I've seen Jeff walk with purpose and like lead the way.

You like led the way through the coffee shop, straight to line.

We left and you were like a bullet, like straight for whatever we were gonna.

I just don't have time for the nonsense.

No,

what your driving really begs to differ on that one.

No, I think it's just because for about two years, this was my front yard.

Yeah, when I was going through the divorce and transitioning into you know, finding a new home and stuff, I lived in a condo.

I'm not gonna out it, but I lived in a condo very, very close to here.

Got it.

Uh, it there's like 10, 15 you can see, yeah, uh, around us.

I lived in in one.

I considered this to be my front yard.

Yes,

it was unusual seeing you.

Merritt Coffee.

That Merritt Coffee was my coffee shop for two years.

We walked in that shop from the door that was the

but it was fine because we had somebody a Sherpa leading us all the way to where we needed to be.

I would have gone the wrong way.

Me too.

He was like,

he walked around the counter and got into a line that I didn't know existed.

Like, oh, there's the way to go, apparently.

It's just a place I know.

I don't know what to say.

So there's a, I think Merritt Coffee is actually a San Antonio.

Oh, yeah, it is.

Yeah, I talked to the dude who was running the one on the triangle one time, and he told me all about it.

He's an RT fan.

I've been to that one before.

Yeah.

I have not drank from this coffee yet, but I've drank at some of the other locations.

Normally, it's really good.

We'll get into that in a bit.

But

I saw this thing in there, which pissed me off, which Eric kept telling me to wait for me.

Oh, I just have to say, save it.

Oh, my God, save it.

Oh, my God, save it.

People take their dogs to too many places.

I have a dog thing for you, too.

I'm a dog person.

Yeah.

But But like, I feel like every other time I go to the grocery store, someone's got their fucking dog in there.

Yeah.

And someone had their dog here in Merritt.

And apparently it's fine.

I'll acknowledge Merritt had a bowl for water for a dog inside the establishment, which I personally think is kind of weird, but whatever.

That's their prerogative.

They can do that.

That's fine.

If the company, if the establishment's okay with it.

That's on them.

But this dude walked in with a dog.

The dog walked straight up to the counter, got on its hind legs, and put its paws on the counter where people get their food

and their coffee.

And then the dude reached over.

He grabbed something like water or something.

It was like a treat, like a little treat.

Yeah, and started giving it to the dog while the dog's slobbering all over the counter where people get their food and their coffee.

I was like, okay, that's too far.

And then he proceeded to come over and get in everyone's way and block the only way in and out.

Yeah.

If the dog...

The way the dog stood at the counter.

What kind of

blue healer of that thing?

The way the dog stood at the counter and put his paws on the counter at the perfect height looked like he was about to pull out glasses, put them on, and order his own drink.

Yes, it was like a shaggy DA.

It really was a shaggy DA type situation.

It's too much.

It's too much.

I get it.

It's fine.

Don't let your dog put their paws on the counter and slobber all over it.

Have them sit.

They're a good boy.

They deserve a treat.

Give it to them on the ground, not where the people food and the people drinks go.

Please.

Someone's going to put their hands there.

Then they're going to shake my hand.

I'm going to have dog shit all over my hand.

I don't want it.

Let's talk about dog shit for a second.

And let's talk about one of my favorite spots in Austin.

This giant square of fake grass right here that is set out with a bunch of Adirondack chairs.

It's bordered by, if you're not here, it's bordered by a pet store, a Trader Joe's, nice coffee store, the coffee shop.

There's a True Foods restaurant.

So it's just like a little square, like a little patch of grass, park area almost in the middle of all of these establishments.

but it's small, right?

It's like

the size of, it's maybe like the length of a basketball court.

If that.

Yeah, if that.

And it's a square.

So, but what you will see if you come down here on the weekends or if you live here like I used to, moms and dads bring their kids to this little patch of grass here and they play all day long.

You just see, like by about 2 p.m., there'll just be 30 strollers here and there'll just be kids running around playing ball and rolling around and having a time.

It's adorable.

At about 7 p.m., they all go home to feed their kids and stuff, and everybody who lives here, they all bring their dogs out to take pisses and shits right there on that spot of fake land, of fake grass, right?

All night long, thousands of dogs piss all over this.

And then in the morning, the kids come out and they roll around in it.

And it's all fucking rich kids.

It's all these rich kids and strollers just rolling around and dried dog piss.

I will say that is on the parents.

There is very clearly

a dog waste station right here in one of the corners with baggies.

You know what the purpose of this is.

100% on the parents.

But Emily and I would sit here and we'd go to that like baked bear place every once in a while and get some ice cream.

Or I'd just be by myself.

I'd just sit and I'd just watch kids roll around.

Sometimes in the day you can watch, like a dog would come up and take a piss, then leave, and then three minutes later, a lady pull up a stroller and kid will go fucking do a somersault right through it.

That's kind of tangential to the reason, you know, when we

would go do a lot of events back in the day, you know, people would bring us stuff stuff to sign.

Yeah.

And it's part of the reason if anyone ever handed me a shoe to like sign, I would never sign a shoe.

I used to sign the shoes.

Yeah, that's all it is.

Like, it's not just what you're talking about, it's not a phenomenon limited to that grass patch.

It's everywhere.

I have a real problem with people that don't tie their shoes for that.

Oh, yeah.

Like, my daughter used to do that a lot.

She just walked around and was like, I don't care, just have untied shoelaces.

And it's like, no, because those shoelaces are now covered in piss and shit and dead animals and rotting food and everything that touches the ground.

Remember, I've said this before, all of this that we see right now is a toilet for birds.

A dinosaur probably took a big dump somewhere around here.

Yeah, but it's powering my car now.

Yeah,

it's just gross.

And that's what I don't get when people wear shoes inside of a house.

Like, you're just tracking all of that in.

Yeah.

Eric's thinking of a counterpoint.

No, no, no counterpoint.

I was going to, I started thinking about, so when you have people over, you ask them to take off your shoes, but you don't have people over.

Right.

So problem solved.

Yeah, there you go.

Done and done.

So really, that's why I stopped and paused.

The words were coming out of my mouth, but then I answered my own question.

I have a little box of shoe booties by my door.

So if there's service people like electricians or plumbers who come by, I ask them to put it on.

You ever offer those guys a beer?

I'm from water.

I would never offer them a beer.

When they're getting done, I'm just like, one for the road.

And usually the guy's like, ah, no, it's all right.

But I've had one or two guys that are like,

all right.

Yeah.

Those are my guys.

This is where we're sitting here.

This is a part of Austin that's, obviously, if you look around, it's undergone extreme transformation.

None of these buildings used to be here.

But I think...

I will say all the transformation here took place eight, nine years ago.

It's been pretty, it's been this for a while.

Yeah,

for some reason, I still feel like that's fairly recent, but you're right.

It hasn't all been here a while.

In fact, that over there, the monarch, that building, that condo, I think we mentioned it once in the past.

One of the former Austin mayors used to live there, Will Wynn.

And it was kind of a local scandal because there was security camera footage of him choking a dude out.

Really?

I guess like Will, the mayor was having a party and some dude who wasn't invited showed up and they got into an altercation and the mayor started beating him up and choking him.

And it was on like the surveillance footage from the condo and it was like, it was plain nonstop on the local news for a while.

That's why we say in Austin, our mayor could beat up your mayor.

But

I don't think we say that anymore ever since Will Win.

But there used to be a lot of, obviously, before they built all this stuff, there was other things here before.

Whenever I come down to this area, I was thinking about like,

I don't remember exactly where it was anymore, but like Lazona Rosa, Lazona Rosa and Austin Music Hall used to be around.

I think Austin Music Hall was a little east of here over there, kind of by where Mellow Johnny's is maybe.

Lazona Rosa was also by Mellow Johnny's.

If you go further, it's 4th Street, right?

You go further down, it's still there.

The building is still there.

Yeah, it's like a workspace now or something.

And I don't know if you remember, but Lozona Rosa on the outside used to have pictures of like Willie Nelson and famous musicians that have played there.

They're all still there.

Oh, okay.

Like the building is still there.

It looks the same.

It's just some tech company or something.

The Austin Music Hall building is definitely gone, though.

Right on the other.

Yeah, the Austin Music Hall is definitely gone.

That's why I remember being in my...

Now it's a new Austin music hall, right?

Early to mid-20s, I guess before we did Rooster T, going to like a bunch of different concerts.

I saw Weezer there with you at at the Austin Music Hall.

Yeah, I saw also Garbage there.

We saw Tenacious D there, I think.

Yeah, I think so.

That's how long ago that was.

So some of the...

It's like if an act wasn't big enough to fill an arena, but still like super popular because it was a big venue.

But too big to play like Emo's.

Right.

It was like the perfect size, mid-size venue for acts like that, of that caliber.

It definitely picked up a lot because we used to have a place called Liberty Lunch that was a little bit bigger than Emo's, and it kind of filled that space.

Like that's where I saw the Cranberries play.

But when Liberty Lunch closed, then like Austin Music Hall would be like a Cranberries destination.

Talking about like level of band.

Right.

Oh man, speaking of music venues, on the way in, we drove down 35 and we drove by the Irwin Center, which is being demolished.

It got replaced by the Moody Center.

And now if you like look through, so the Irwin Center used to be a music venue.

Pretty decent size.

It's kind of locally famous because it's right off the interstate and it's a circular building.

It looks like a flan.

It looks like a what?

A flan?

It looks like a flan.

Yeah, yeah, it does.

And now, like, they're tearing it down because, you know, the Moody Center opened up, and

you can look through it from 35.

If you look over as you're in traffic, you can see straight through it, and you can see that they've gutted it, and they're just tearing all the innards out, which was because I don't even think that had been around too long.

I think the Irwin Center only got constructed in the early 70s, maybe.

So maybe it was around 50 years.

I saw, did you ever see the documentary Searching for Sugar Man?

Came out, I don't know, maybe 10 years ago now?

I never did, no.

But I heard of it.

I saw Rodriguez perform at the Irwin Center.

Did you really?

Yeah, after that documentary, he did a couple of tours.

How was it?

It was great.

I think that might be the only concert I ever saw in the Irwin Center.

Oh, man.

I saw

when I was 18 years old, my friend made me go with him to a Pink Floyd laser light show there.

They had that there?

Yeah, at the Irwin Center, they had a Pink Floyd laser light show, and this would have been 1994, probably, or 95.

And

I hated it.

It wasn't my scene at the the time, and he was on acid, so he loved it.

I was not.

And then the only other concert I think I went to is I saw, I took Millie and her friends to see Panic at the disco there.

Well,

that's the entirety of my experience at Frank Ormond Center.

I think I saw a Pink Floyd laser light show at like the Natural History Museum in Houston when I was like 18.

Do they still do those anymore?

I don't know, but I was still for a while.

It's where you go when you're 18, apparently, because I was also 18 when I saw it.

Oh, oh, oh.

So So

this past weekend, I drove through San Antonio and I had a memory of something in Austin that you and I used to see fairly regularly and we would always laugh about.

When we worked at the call center,

you know, down south, there, we've talked about like some of the other businesses that were there off of Burleson close by.

We talked about Happy Taco.

We talked about that mermaid's place.

But like right across the street, I don't remember when it was.

It might have been like 2000, 2001.

This establishment opened up

in one of those

strip malls.

No, it was like, you know how you come out?

There's like the Conico was right there.

Like, just to the left was that little building.

The one where Robert Rodriguez worked?

Where they had the old Troublemaker studios?

I thought that was down to the right.

That was, oh, you're right.

That was to the right.

Okay.

And that Conico had slush puppies.

It did.

Sometimes you would go on break and go get slush puppies.

Remember you guys.

It's hard to get slush puppies.

You guys told me that specifically when we drove by that area.

And it was like, man, this is hard living.

There was not much out there.

My historical knowledge of candy-related things is huge, dude.

But

a business opened up around 2000 or 2001 and it was called Paradise for Gentlemen.

I remember that.

They had a neon sign out there on Burleson and it was like a shapely palm tree with two suggestive coconuts on it.

That's wow.

You that got him.

Yeah, do you remember it now?

I do.

And that business was around for a while and then eventually it closed.

And then one day, you know, they took the neon sign away.

I was like, oh, that's sad.

It was always funny to like see the neon sign sign and be like that's a sexy palm tree but then like a couple of months later we saw it in San Antonio like some business either the business had moved or someone had reappropriated it and it was like off I don't remember exactly where it was like off of

35 and 410 maybe

somewhere in that neighborhood and like just driving like off the freeway I was like holy shit that's the same

sign but anyway I drove through San Antonio this past weekend and the sign wasn't there who knows how long it's been gone but I drove by there I was like oh man that's where the Paradise for Gentlemen sign used to be after it left Austin and it just it was just like it was so funny to me to think about do you think that do you think that sign is just making its way down by 35 and like it's in it's in Laredo now

the body of a 35 to 40 year old was found face down in the parking lot at Paradise for Gentlemen in the 4,000 block of North North Panam Expressway this is from 2012

Panam Expressway Panam Expressway where is that San Antonio so you're probably right that it is moving it's just they're like, that was probably the end of it there, and I bet it's just moving south.

Paradise is just slowly heading south.

It's climate change relationships.

You got to move.

But man, I tried.

It's funny because after I thought about it, I tried Googling to look for the neon sign.

I'm looking for it now.

It's killing me.

I couldn't find it.

Do you think you ever took a photo of it?

I know.

It was like before I would have Jones.

I tried over the weekend to find

an image of it.

I just couldn't find it.

This dude's dog's about to go take a big-ass piss right in the middle of that.

And then some little girl in a sundress is going to go fucking play with her doll there.

Oh, that's it.

Yes, he found it.

Send me that so I can put it on the website.

You know what I had to send it to?

Send me that so I can jack off to it again.

Two years.

I had to put it in quotes, Paradise for Gentlemen, and then search San Antonio, Texas.

Oh, I was searching for Austin.

Yep.

Okay.

It probably had a longer life in San Antonio.

There are actually a few pictures of it.

Okay.

This is pretty crazy.

I should have searched San Antonio.

I was only searching Austin.

I mean, who would have thought?

Yeah, well, it was only in Austin for a couple of years.

It was in San Antonio for way longer.

I will say, calling that a palm tree is really bold.

That's just, that's, wow, that's really shapely.

That's very shapely.

I told you.

Yeah, Jeff jacked off to that.

Yeah, send me that image.

I'll put it on the website.

Yeah, I'll put something on it.

It was like such a weird core memory, something we saw every day.

And I've totally forgotten about it.

I probably could have gone my whole life and died without ever thinking about that sign again.

But like just driving down that section of road in San Antonio, I was like, even driving, we drove down that stretch of Burleson in Austin a couple weeks ago.

We did, we did.

And I didn't think about it, but like driving down that stretch of San Antonio, I was like, oh, paradise for gentlemen.

I would have never thought about it for the rest of my life if you hadn't mentioned the palm trees.

Like even when you mentioned the name, I was like, yeah, I do remember that that was a place.

And I was thinking to myself, was that one of those like all-nude places?

Or is that what the thing was?

But no, it was, yeah, it was the palm trees.

Yeah, I have no idea what that business was.

It was just we worked really close to it and saw that sign all the time.

You didn't know what the business was.

Well, I have a good idea.

Yeah.

I think I knew what the business was.

I don't know if they jack you off or you jack yourself off.

Like,

how does it work here?

I don't know how much you've got.

Yeah, that's absolutely right.

And then you get found nude in the parking lot face down.

Betty died happy, though.

There's a couple of places like that still around town.

There's that place over there by the office right off of 35.

Pleasures?

Pleasures.

That's been there forever.

I used to live right over there, like on sort of like on that other side.

And

you never saw people go in and out, but you would see cars parked there.

You can't be good.

It's not a place that you think, you look at it and you think, yeah, there's pleasure in there.

Definitely.

No, it should be called Pains.

Ooh, bread.

All of that, I think, is getting demolished.

Oh, is it?

In front of the 35 expansion.

No one's mounting a campaign to save pleasure.

No, I just want to say that.

It's that spot.

There's like a little tea shop that's like right there.

That's getting demolished.

That's a weird location.

That whole strip is a weird location.

Speaking of stuff that's getting demolished and developed, did you see it?

It looks like I think the city finally approved the development of that area just south of the river where like Joe's Crab Shack is, where the apartment where we went and fixed Fiona's friend's computer is.

All that area is going to be.

You can build...

I think like 50 stories high now, and they're going to dense it in.

It's going to be like where the Austin American Statesman was.

That whole strip is going to be.

Oh, really?

Yeah, I think the the old Statesman location, they envisioned almost like a second downtown where you just go across the river and it's just more high-rises and built out.

It's basically going to be like what you see north of the river just immediately on the other side of the river.

I mean, fine, good.

Whatever.

I love it.

Austin Cyclecade must be fucking losing it.

They must be so stoked.

Well, the fucking Austin American Statesman building's just been sitting empty forever.

And that's a huge space.

Four years?

Four or five years, yeah.

I mean, it was empty enough to film a bunch of that funhouse sketch comedy show in there.

Went Went down there and filmed it.

And it was just like, oh, this place is empty, empty, crazy.

Yeah.

It'll be interesting to see, like, the skyline is so

different since when we moved here.

It'll be wild to see it spread to the other side of the river.

The river's always been such a barrier, you know, such a dividing line between

me and Austin.

It'll be interesting to see somebody finally, like, try to bridge that gap and connect it.

I was talking to Brandon Farmahi yesterday about this.

How do you feel about what you would call like there's a proposal for what you would call like a second downtown or what people are calling it up at Domain?

Do you care at all?

Does that matter?

I feel like people say that all the time.

They say that about the Domain.

They say that about Riverside, where the ballpark was.

They say that about the Brody Oaks down south.

Yeah, but have you guys driven, have you guys been to the Domain lately or driven by it?

That's nuts.

It looks like a second downtown.

Yeah, there's a stadium and a top golf and there's like golf.

There's the headquarters to fucking Indeed is there.

It's a pretty big space.

And there's already six or seven buildings that are in the 20-story range.

But that's how I feel about it.

Just do it.

They raise the variance there, too.

You're going to be able to develop higher there.

Why not expand in that area to eliminate the need for everyone to come down here all the time?

That's like Houston, right?

Houston has like...

Houston's nuts.

Houston has three downtowns.

So like three clustered downtowns.

But that's like every, like major cities do that.

Not everything has to be in the 15-block radius of right here.

I think that.

I think we all agree with you.

Good.

If we're going to keep it that way.

It's become strangely like

everything else in this country right now.

It's become like a politicized fight, right?

Like the idea of building everything close to people and having like...

walkable 15-minute cities

is viewed as like the attempt to take cars away from people.

Right.

Okay.

Right.

Take them away.

I don't don't give a shit.

It's the dumbest thing in the world.

If I didn't have to drive everybody.

I would love it.

Oh my god.

Yeah.

If we could rock so hard.

If we could walk to everything or take public transportation.

Take all the cars away so we'd have to live like those poor, miserable sons of bitches in the rest of the world with their public transport.

Now, when we had our studio downtown and I lived, you know,

over on West, what is that, West 6th?

West 5th?

I would take the bus to work downtown every day to and from.

Like, I loved it.

It was fucking great.

Can you imagine living in a city with the dillow again?

Like, if I lived downtown and the dillow existed again, I wouldn't need anything.

I miss that shit.

You guys have talked about it before.

I would love if that was something.

I would love if we had that stuff.

I know that they're doing

like express bus expansion

that's going to go right by our office.

That's really

building.

Oh, I saw that.

Yeah.

It's like in Mueller.

It goes out towards like.

I think it'll take you to the airport.

It goes to like the Expo Center.

It comes downtown.

It stops in Mueller.

And it's like, dude, it drops you off right by uh the uh the moody center yeah i saw it because i was excited i was like i could just get on that bus from the office and go straight to the airport can you imagine yeah like dude that would that would be

awesome yeah i would love to have that i might use it yeah

god

uh anyway uh

who knew uh public transit so polarizing Let's fucking do it.

So stupid.

I got, I think, I texted you guys about this.

I got so fucking mad the other day.

unreasonably mad

You know, it's a new year.

I got an email from my mortgage provider that was like there's a shortage in your escrow.

Oh, right.

Oh this click on the link in this email to find out more.

I was like, okay

I clicked it and rather than taking in you know rather than taking me to a website where I can log in and view my mortgage it took me to a quote-unquote personalized video that explained the escrow shortage to me.

So rather than just showing me a static website with my mortgage,

how much I owe, what the escrow shortage is, it took me to a two-minute video

that started with, hello, Gustavo.

This is what an escrow is.

It's a two-minute long explanation of an escrow.

And then in the video, it's like, and here is your shortage.

It's like 30 bucks a month or whatever, $360 over the year.

I was like, okay, that's, why couldn't, why did I have to watch this video?

Why did you, why not just send me the fucking email or tell me to log into my account and let me look at it?

Like, I don't need a primer on this.

Like, I don't need you to explain escrow to me i already have it i've been paying the bills for five years i understand escrow right and i understand the value for someone who's maybe getting a you know their first experience in the mortgage yeah i have the video as an option for them if they want to see it for an explanation but yeah also just give me the the information directly i don't know how often i see i don't know if you watch if you are subscribed to the personal finance subreddit but i feel like multiple times a week it's a post from someone who says hey my mortgage payment went up this year i don't know why but i have to pay 300 a month more than I did last year.

Does anyone know why?

It's like, yeah, your property taxes went up.

Or like,

you live.

You can't fight your property taxes.

Or it's a new build, and the previous year when you bought it, it was assessed on the undeveloped land.

And now there's a house on it.

So it's being assessed, the tax value with a house on it.

And

it's just wild to me how much that can go up.

And no one warns you when you buy your house.

Like, hey,

your house is going to get revalued, and you might have to pay a lot more on your mortgage next year.

Because a lot of people people might just budget for

this is my payment, this is what I'm going to be paying, not realizing it could be very different next year.

Like, I think that's irresponsible.

Always be aware that it can go up.

Very rarely can it ever go down.

But be prepared for it to go up.

Yeah, the government's not going, that's fine.

We'll take this money.

We looked at it, and we're charging you too much.

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Olivia loves a challenge.

It's why she lifts heavy weights.

and likes complicated recipes.

But for booking her trip to Paris, Olivia chose the easy way with Expedia.

She bundled her flight with a hotel to save more.

Of course, she still climbed all 674 steps to the top of the Eiffel Tower.

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Expedia, made to travel.

Flight-inclusive packages are at all protected.

So I was driving, like I said, I was driving through San Dishonourable the other day, so I had to drive up and down 35.

And it's always interesting to me once you get a little further out of Austin, Austin, the billboards.

I love billboards.

I think they're incredibly stupid.

Yeah, it's the best.

So, and then I love when I see a stupid billboard.

And out there between like

New Bronfels and San Marcos, there's this one billboard that's always like super political.

And I was like, ooh, I wonder if they changed it.

And they did.

It was,

it's always something about keeping.

In the past, I've seen stuff about keeping Californians out of Texas and things like that.

But the message changed a little bit this time.

It was, close the dang border, keep Texas red.

I was like, okay.

Now, not mad at the Californians anymore,

mad at the border, the different border.

Yeah, um, but I was driving through Kyle, gotta be mad at somebody, though.

Yeah, gotta be mad at somebody.

Can't just be cool.

But I was driving through Kyle, and there was a billboard for a lawyer that we don't see in Austin.

It was like, I guess, a Kyle-based lawyer.

And it was like,

I forget what the name of the law firm was, but

he billed himself as

Warrior Lawyer.

And

I kept saying it out like a warrior warrior lawyer.

Warrior Lawyer.

Warrior Lawyer.

That's a real.

That's a real Georgier.

Jackie George.

I was like, man, that is a.

Not the best thing.

I saw another one that just said, like, what is it?

Law gun.

Law gun.

What does that mean?

No weapons.

I've seen law gun.

Have you okay?

I was like, yeah.

That's my wife's favorite one.

She loves law gun.

She thinks that's so, she's like, that's the funniest thing that you could be as a lawyer is a log gun.

Like, everyone has to

carve out their niche.

And, like, what are they?

The law gun.

But yeah, small town billboards are the best.

Especially once you got Austin.

I feel like once you go north out of Austin, it becomes very religious.

Lots of Jesus billboards.

One of the craziest things was when we were

the year of the election, the last election, we took a road trip up to Detroit from Austin.

And so we drove through Arkansas, Oklahoma, Tennessee,

a bunch of places.

And we just, we counted by state, like,

just for fun, how many Trump ads versus Biden ads from state to state.

It was interesting to see.

I don't remember the figures now, but it was interesting to see.

And it was a staggering amount of Trump billboards

and homemade signs and like

just everywhere.

I didn't see many billboards on the street.

It's probably not close enough to the election yet.

But I did see a lot of

flags and homemade signs.

A lot of homemade signs.

People are very passionate about it.

Bummer.

A lot of passion out there.

Yeah.

If only people, well, never mind.

I was going to say, if only people would take that passion and do something with it other than fucking paint a sign, but maybe those people shouldn't be engaged in their passion.

Exactly.

Maybe we should, yeah, you keep making your signs.

We are.

That's the difference you need to make.

We did that.

You keep making your dumb signs.

We did that one day in January a few years ago.

So I think they could just make signs.

That's probably fine.

Signs work.

Yeah.

Stick with the signs.

I haven't been down here to this area in a while.

At least you get this true food kitchen every now and then.

Pretty good.

And I guess every now and then I might come to Trader Joe's.

I'm not crazy about Trader Joe's like some other people are.

Oh, really?

I love it.

There's definitely some people who are all about it.

It's fine.

It's just very cheap.

Yeah.

And when you find the stuff you like there,

I just really, there's certain things I really like there.

And like they have a really good

frozen

chicken in the salo thing that I love to eat.

You pop it in the microwave?

No, because my microwave is broken.

Still, you didn't go buy one for like 30 bucks?

What are you doing?

No, because I don't really use a microwave that often.

I was trying to get it.

Yeah, it's just in the microwave for six minutes.

Yeah, I put it in for 128 minutes and it got lukewarm.

I was hoping out.

Damn, you foiled me this time, Ramsey.

But yeah, I remember it was a big deal.

This was the first Trader Joe's in Austin.

No.

Who was the first one?

Oh, it was over in Rolling Wood or like off of B Cave.

Out towards the Hudson on the Bend or whatever.

Yeah, Yeah, that was, it was a boom, that restaurant hasn't been there in 40 years.

I don't know why I said that.

People were freaking the fuck out when that trader joe's opened.

With like lines, it was nuts.

Yeah, that was the first one.

There's one up at the Arboretum, and then there's this one.

I think there's the only three in town.

Yeah.

Yeah, there are.

There's the Arboretum one, this one, and then that one up there.

I think that's it.

Yeah, I think you're right.

Yeah, people.

I always go to the Arboretum one.

I don't, just because this one might actually be closer to me where I live, but it's just a fucking pain to drive a car downtown now.

Yeah, but

the parking garage here is easier.

The parking lot at the Arboretum is terrible.

I've never really,

that's not true.

Yeah, you might walk a bit, but yeah.

Yeah, it's, and I don't know, people get really aggressive.

Some guy got really mad at me at a light the other day.

I pulled up, like, there were a few cars in front of me.

I was in the left-turned lane.

Uh-huh.

And they all started going.

Then, I think two cars in front of me, as he was going through the intersection, the light turned yellow.

So he went through.

The car in front of me continued going through because it was yellow.

Then I didn't go through because I knew it was about to turn red.

And the guy behind me, I could see him in my rearview mirror, started honking and throwing his hands up all angry and like hitting his steering wheel.

I was like,

I felt uncomfortable about going through that.

Like that guy definitely extra fire.

He would have been red the entire time he went through.

And I was like, you know what?

Why is that guy so like we ended up waiting?

I timed it.

It was like 70 seconds until the green arrow came back on and we could go.

I was like, why are you that mad over a madman?

I'm in a glasses half full of this situation.

I'm going to say that that guy, he wasn't being a dick because he was mad at you.

He was frustrated because he had explosive diarrhea.

Maybe.

And he's just trying to get home to his toilet.

And he's like, God, I'm going to shit my pants.

I've been in that situation.

I'm in that situation a lot.

70 seconds is a long time.

This dog's going to do it, too.

Look at it.

There you go.

Pissed off.

That's right where a kid's going to play with his little transformer toy.

I'm going to roll around in it.

People get...

Really angry in their cars.

My go-to move, if someone makes me mad, you know, cuts me off.

off.

Oh, man, I got cut off the other day.

Rather than flip someone off or get really angry, I just kind of shake my head and give them a thumbs down.

So disappointed in them.

I'm so disappointed.

I'm not mad.

I'm disappointed.

Yeah, could have done so much better.

Thumbs down.

It's just so degrading.

I saw

a crosswalk guard, a crossing guard do that once.

And I was like, oh, that's the move.

Such a fun move.

Someone blew through the lane when she was trying to stop it for kids to cross.

And she just thumbs down them really aggressively.

I was like, oh, that's it.

You know, that thumb hit hard.

Yeah.

I was like, that's the way to to do it.

Oh, now the dog's taking a dump.

Yeah, fuck you.

That's right.

I'm going to roll around in that.

So you lived around here.

You'd come over to Merritt.

What are the other spots that you would hit in this area that you felt like were your spots?

Well,

there weren't a ton because I was getting sober,

and most of the shit around here is bars.

That's definitely true.

And most of the shit around here that isn't a bar has a bar-like atmosphere.

And so I felt pretty.

It was probably not the best time to live downtown above a bunch of bars.

No.

Of course, just the way it worked out.

Great spots.

But so I loved here.

I used to go to Irene's a lot, which is a little restaurant bar over there.

I like Irene's.

I used to go to Frank and Angie's all the time.

Obviously, it's gone now.

Sammy's is there.

It's awesome.

Where

Frank and Angie's in the fucking hamburger hutch used to be.

Yeah.

There's a place over there now called Favorite Pizza that's fucking awesome.

And I recommend anybody in Austin who wants, wants, or anybody visiting who just wants a quick slice of New York-style pizza and to have a little bit of a New York vibe when they do it.

It's a great spot.

I used to, honestly, I always considered Whole Foods and Trader Joe's to be my places because I had like Whole Foods on one side of me and Trader Joe's on the other.

And so it was awesome.

It was, I don't know.

That's where I spent a lot of my time.

That Whole Foods has like seven restaurants in it.

That's great.

Yeah, there's so many different places to eat there.

That favorite pizza place, I used to be a liquor store.

Was it called like Centennial Liquor?

It's the first place I ever, first liquor store I ever went into.

It's the first liquor store I bought liquor from when I turned 21.

Wow, really?

Yeah.

It's the first liquor store I ever set foot in.

You and I bought a bottle of rum there one time when our office was downtown.

We walked over here.

I think we had had lunch at Whole Foods.

On the way back, we stopped by that liquor store.

We bought a bottle of rum.

We're walking back to the office, and we got to the office.

That was the day Brandon was like interviewing to work for us.

Oh, wow.

And he was on his way out.

I think he was talking to Bernie.

And then you walked up with that bottle of rum, and you just looked at him and said, we're going to get drunk.

And we walked upstairs to the office.

That was the first time we ever met Brandon Farmahini.

That was our first interaction with him.

I did not remember that, but that's funny.

That's also not the first liquor store I ever walked into.

I don't know why I said that.

I'm just sitting here thinking about it.

That's not true.

That can't be true.

Well, then, why did you say, what do you...

I don't know.

In my head, I thought it was true for a second.

It's definitely an early place, but I turned, but I'm just trying to, you go back and you try to reconnect the dots and you realize your memories are a little foggy.

You were 21 before you got here.

Yeah, but I was 21 in Texas.

Oh, true.

Yeah.

I was in Kleene and I would come down here a lot.

But I think I'm confusing it with another liquor store in Austin.

But even then, I think I probably went to one on base.

Yeah, so you probably did that over there.

That's probably total bullshit.

You have liquor stores on base?

Yeah.

Yeah, everything on base.

Wild.

Liquor?

Tax-free liquor on base.

At the Army?

Why not?

Liquor at the Army.

You're not on.

You're off.

You're not on deployment.

You're fucking.

You're off a lot of times.

You're on the government.

You're on.

What?

They want to make money too.

They got a whole store there.

Right.

I guess just liquor is a weird thing that I wouldn't think that the government would be like, yeah, sell it on our property.

They want to make money.

They want to make money off of it.

It's like a company store.

It's the military.

It's just like, it's the way the world used to work before we had unions.

It's like, yeah, fucking buy it here.

Put it on credit.

We don't care.

Then you'll owe us forever.

You'll never get out of the fucking army.

The dollar is company money.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Makes you think.

I don't know what it makes you think about, but it makes you think.

If you're at home right now and you're thinking, let let us know.

Yeah, you're welcome.

Let us know what it was you thought about.

Let's talk about Merit a little bit.

So the reason that I wanted to come to Merit outside of it being in the spot and everything, I gave you guys two locations to pick from, and we picked this one.

Merit just got the contract with Austin FC at Q2 Stadium to provide the cold brew coffee, which they'd never done before.

They'd never had coffee at the stadium, which is fucking insane.

Yeah, that's not.

Yeah, especially in the middle of summer where it's so fucking hot.

Like, just eat cold brew.

Let me just chug it.

They have the contract now to have that there.

So they have like a little corner area where

in one of like the snack area, like snack bar things or whatever.

Not an Austrian business, huh?

Okay.

That's what I wanted to say.

There are other places that were up for that contract that didn't get it that are Austin-based, and they went with the San Antonio one.

It's weird, like, for people who aren't from here, even the...

airport here in Austin is all like all the food is local places.

Yeah, we kind of it's kind of a thing thing in Austin.

They pride themselves on on supporting local business.

It's a thing in Q2 Stadium.

Yeah.

They have Slovach, they have Easy Tiger, they have One Taco,

they have Pluckers, they have all like these Austin places.

Is one Taco Austin or Dallas?

I don't know.

I always assumed it was Austin, but I could be wrong.

I don't know.

I'm going to look at Dallas.

I don't know.

Really?

I couldn't believe that Merritt got that contract not being a Austin business.

That's so crazy.

Everything, all their branding is San Antonio.

Yeah, yeah, I mean,

that's why I said, like, I think this place from San Antonio, I looked at the cup, like oh, yeah,

I could not believe that it got, that a non-Austin-based place got that, especially with the amount of coffee shops and roasteries that we have here to go with Merit.

100% local.

I was wrong.

That's what I thought.

I really like One Taco is the only place that my wife will get tacos really in Austin because it'll be the little street tacos.

She just wants,

she wants carnasada, onion cilantro, put it on the taco.

Let me eat all the tacos.

Two bites each.

Oh, boom, boom, boom.

Speaking of tacos, I saw that Veracruz has birria tacos now.

It must be the brick-and-mortar,

not a trailer, but I'm going to go check that out.

Okay.

So

Merritt, San Antonio, has like three or four locations in Austin.

Yeah.

There's one down south from where we are.

There's one here on 4th.

And then I think there's one on like North Lamar.

Yeah, the Triangle.

Yeah.

And so there's like, there's a few, but they're just on like one drag.

Let's just take it over, right?

Like, Free Birds isn't technically an Austin business, but

we've claimed it for many, many years.

Let's just claim merit.

It's ours.

Just because it started in San Antonio doesn't mean that's it.

What's Santi's going to do?

Stop us?

Yeah, what are they going to do?

Kick out.

Spurs Haven City.

Oh, yeah.

Did you get Spurs tickets?

I did.

I bought tickets to Spurs Nuggets on

March 15th, I think.

Here in Austin?

Yeah.

Look for Jeff on TV.

I mean, if they show him instead of Drake and John Mulaney and every other person.

That's an equal opportunity.

That's the reason I picked that game is because when we went, Eric and I went last year and we saw like A-Rod and

I don't even remember who else.

We saw a bunch of famous people.

The San Antonio Creature.

Saw the San Antonio Creature.

They've been doing this thing where they're...

Last year they had two San Antonio Spurs games in Austin.

This year I think they have four or eight.

Oh, yeah.

And they're really trying to expand it.

They're making it like a week-long thing.

They're doing stuff all over the place.

It's Spurs week in Austin that week.

The reason I wanted to go this year, actually, I wanted to go because Wim and Yama.

I want to see him, but the tickets were ridiculous.

Coyote.

But the reason I got the creature.

The main reason I wanted to go is I realized this game

is going to be in Austin on the main Friday of South by Southwest.

Oh, gosh.

And it's Wimby and Joker, NBA champion Joker, playing against each other.

So I figured the celebrity sighting and the nonsense is going to go through the roof.

For sure.

So there's no way I'm missing that game.

So the NBA is feeling out of Austin for a team then, is what I'm gathering.

No fucking chance.

I fucking hope so.

There's no way the Spurs or anyone else is going to let Austin have this.

It is the Spurs going, think we can make money off this fucking dope-ass city?

Yeah, hell yeah.

Viola.

They got the Mavericks and the Spurs here, and of course the

Rockets, but it's like the Spurs, an Austin team, and the Mavericks.

You get the 35 series, all up and down the I-35 corner.

What is going to happen?

So

what people are saying...

behind the scenes is that they're

if Austin is to ever get an NBA team it would have to be the Spurs moving from San Antonio to Austin.

And there has been some discussion about that over the last few years.

We took Merritt.

We're going to take the fucking Spurs.

I'll trade him.

Yeah, no, it's like that was, yeah, we took your coffee, now we're taking your team.

Hell yeah.

Here's the creature dressed like baby Yoda.

It's a coyote.

It's not a creature.

Why is it a creature?

That's the coyote.

You move the Spurs to Austin.

I'll be a fucking Spurs fan.

Oh,

yeah.

Why not?

Fuck it.

Absolutely.

I've made it in my entire life.

And if you keep the creature, I'm way in.

Now we're going to make it a bat.

Oh, I like that.

Yeah.

Just put wings on.

Have you ever seen him be Batman?

No.

Oh, okay.

Bat Coyote?

So the thing that happens at a lot of Spurs games is bats fly in.

This is real.

Bats fly in, and they have.

It's Raby's Night at the Spurs.

They have him dressed like Batman, and he will go out with a net and catch the bat.

Oh, my God.

What is that, the AT ⁇ T Center or whatever it's called?

It is such a dump.

Is it?

Yeah, you've never been?

I actually saw a Spurs game there once, but it was a long time.

It was like 20 years ago or something.

I've been to about half of the NBA stadiums now, and it is definitely in the bottom.

I saw the Spurs

when I was a kid.

Frosted Frostbank, right?

Frostbank Center?

Is that what it's called?

Oh, you used to be ATT.

Yeah, yeah.

I saw the Spurs play the Suns at the Alamo Dome once.

That was fucking garbage.

What year was that?

That would have been like 94?

Yeah.

95?

Yeah.

You watched Charles Barkley suit up.

I did.

I did.

You're seeing Melanja.

What the fuck?

It was a long time ago.

Wow.

So back on it.

Merit is a San Antonio thing.

It's here in Austin.

What did you guys think of the coffee?

I mean, you, I think, are.

I might be biased because I've been a Merit fan for a while.

I have even transferred my love of Merit to the

triangle location.

That's actually one of my four or five in my rotation.

I go there and I work sometimes.

And so I'm a fan.

I give this iced coffee a nine.

I think it's

a perfect nine.

Like right down like not 9.1 not 9.9 9 even

I think this is this is a great Americano it's not the best in the world that I've had I think we've had we've had better here but it's really solid I would give this like

8.2 this place to me is the Rudy's barbecue coffee yeah you know what I mean that's a fair assessment like you can go to Franklin you could go to Des Nudo

But if you don't want to wait in line,

Rudy's BBQ and Merritt are always going to have A-plus coffee.

Is Rudy's BBQ an Austin place?

Yes.

I think we claim it, but it's actually from the Hill Country.

I think it's right, you're right.

Yeah.

That's what I wanted to be.

But we've been claiming it for a very long time.

Just like you do with Merit.

And nobody knows.

Just like with Ramparts.

You say it long enough, you claim it long enough, it becomes yours.

Yep.

I think this is a fine cup of coffee.

It's 7.5.

I think it's good.

I liked the last one that we had more, but this was fine.

I think I like this one more than Lamppost, I think.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

The

dog slobbering on the counter counter really kind of did my head in for a minute.

I wasn't very happy about that.

Yeah, that was really something.

I did not deduct points for that.

No, I mean, you could.

I'm just saying.

But it's a fine cup of coffee.

I would never come down here specifically for it, but if I was in the area, I would walk.

You got Trader Joe's.

If you do find yourself over here, get a cup of coffee, spend about 10 minutes watching the kids play and piss,

and then walk down this way over to the library.

We have a fancy new library.

Well, it's not new anymore, but we have a fancy new library.

But I'm not telling you to go to the library, although the library is awesome.

But there's a little suspension bridge right there.

Oh, I love that.

And there are fucking photo shoots going on on that bridge 365 days a year.

And it's fun just to go watch assholes try to pretend to be professional photographers

for 15 minutes.

Yep.

We talked about that library once.

We talked about doing an episode from there, but logistically, I think it's...

Yeah.

Did you try to go?

I think I tried to get it.

Get them out one of those rooms, maybe.

Oh, yeah,

but it's about

getting the coffee.

Yeah.

I think I went there with a friend one time, and it was closed, so we just ended up around this area.

It's a a cool area.

It's a great library.

But this is a, you know, Merit Coffee.

It's a good one.

I like this.

I love this area.

I like being in a downtown.

If I lived in a walkable spot, this would be an easy spot to go to.

This restaurant's pretty good.

Ember Kitchen.

I haven't eaten there in a while, but it was good when I went there.

It's in the old power plant.

Yeah.

So this used to be a power plant?

Is that what this is?

Yeah.

Yeah, this whole thing used to be the Austin power plant.

Weird.

Seaholm.

On the other side of this is the big old fronted power plant with like a big grass yard in front of it.

Why don't I go to the the power plant to vote?

What's with that?

You go to the power plant to vote?

Not all.

The one in Mueller, like the Austin Electric, whatever.

Just because it's a city facility.

It's weird.

Yeah.

It's just weird to go in there.

Also, it's way too nice.

We had talked at one point a long time ago about potentially carving some space out here in Seaholm for rooster teeth.

Yeah.

But it was like it was going to be super expensive.

It was like super premium price.

So we were like, oh, we don't, we're not going to have that kind of money.

But that's Merit.

And we'll check out other coffee spots.

But now it's time to get into an anarchy question.

You can send us an anarchy question at Animopodcast, Twitter and Instagram, or you go to r/slash animopodcast subreddit.

We do not run, but we take questions from there.

But this is from

Liuian.

Liuian.

Yeah,

Liuian.

Love the show and had an anarchy question.

What are Gus and Jeff's thoughts on the feud slash superiority battle between the major cities in Texas?

Do they have any thoughts towards cities like Dallas or Houston?

As someone who was born and raised in San Antonio all my life, I always saw Austin as a snooty-rich city.

And while my attitude towards it has definitely mellowed out over the years, I still have the lingering feeling towards it.

That's mainly the pride that I have in my own hometown.

I think lots of Texas views Austin that way.

Yeah, that's fine.

I don't really give a shit about the rest of Texas.

I love San Antonio.

I think San Antonio is awesome.

I'm not a San Antonio fan.

I'm more of a Houston fan.

Really?

I'm a San Antonio fan.

I have become a San Antonio fan.

I think it's a really cool place.

If I were to live anywhere outside of Austin and Texas, I probably would live in San Antonio.

I'm ambivalent towards Houston.

I don't really have an opinion about it one way or the other.

I used to hate Dallas.

We used to call it LA Light.

You want to talk about Snooty?

Like, Dallas is like fucking rich, dickhead, Texas, right there.

But I will say, the last couple of years, I've really softened on it.

And I've had a really nice time there and I've learned to enjoy it.

I haven't been to Dallas in a while.

I'm really, I feel ambivalent,

to borrow your word, about Dallas.

But I love Houston.

I don't know.

I think I'm sick of San Antonio because growing up in

a small border town, it's like that was the only place we would go to.

That was the big city.

That was our escape.

And I just like, I don't know.

I associate it too much with growing up down there.

I'll say this, Lulia.

I think the rest of Texas hates Austin.

Or when they think about Austin, it's negatively.

And I think the people that live in Austin don't think about the rest of Texas.

I think that's fair.

Yeah.

I think that's pretty on the money.

Growing up in San Diego, like I always viewed Los Angeles as a place I don't like.

It was always like little brother syndrome for Los Angeles.

And I think Los Angeles doesn't think of San Diego at all.

And I think that's sort of what this is.

Similar kind of thing.

What's funny to me is San Antonio is a bigger city than Austin.

It has been forever.

Forever.

But the airport in San Antonio is so shitty.

All of the routes come out of Austin.

Every airline flies in and out of Austin, but really not so much.

Do you remember back in the day, though, before Mueller, when you would have to sometimes you would drive to San Antonio to fly out because they had better flights than we had?

I mean, before Bergstrom.

Beerstrom, sorry.

Yeah.

Yeah.

But yeah, now with Bergstrom, it's totally flipped.

Yeah.

So, no, like, Houston just get out scot-free, huh?

I like Houston.

I like Houston a lot.

I mean, they're big-ass cities.

The thing that they have that I'll give they have museums.

Yeah, the museums are great.

They have big, shitty amenities.

Big, shitty, big city amenities.

Yeah, get them, get them, get them.

They have big city amenities, and Austin does not.

They have aquariums and shit like that that we just don't have.

We have an aquarium.

We have a scam.

We have a scam aquarium.

We do have a scam aquarium.

That's very true.

Interesting.

What about, like, that's all this part.

What about, like, El Paso?

There's nothing else in here.

There's nothing else.

Dude, I'll say this about El Paso.

I have a lot of friends through my wife who are from El Paso.

People who are from El Paso think it is the greatest place on earth.

However, they don't live there anymore.

They all live in Austin.

But everybody that's from El Paso really genuinely loves El Paso.

It makes me almost want to go check it out.

I spent a summer there when I was 14 and someone offered to take me to Mexico for a donkey show.

How was it?

I did not go.

Do you want to be the donkey?

That's all I think about with El Paso.

Like, man, that's a rough first experience to have

with the city.

It's cool to drive down the interstate because you can literally, you know, like one side of the interstate's Mexico and the other side's America.

And it's neat to see, you know.

Someone tried to murder me there, too.

In El Paso?

Yeah.

Well, let's expand on that story.

Yeah, it seemed like you led with everyone that didn't have anything, but then you're getting murdered story, really something.

I was

at UTEP and like right by the football field, there's a

kind of a big hill slash small mountain.

Okay.

You probably see it.

Like if you ever watch like UTEP football, it's all like you see it like right next to the stadium.

And I was up there with some friends of of mine.

Is this when you were 14?

Yeah.

Okay.

And it was the summer.

There's nothing really to do.

And we were just hanging out there on this, like the side of this mountain.

And then,

like I said, it was summer, so class wasn't in session.

The whole campus was empty.

There was nobody in the stadium.

And one of the guys I was out there with was like, hey, you think if I throw this rock, I can make it into the stadium from here?

I was like, nah, there's no way you can throw a rock far to get into the stadium from here.

He's like, all right,

he tried to keep through the rock to see if he could make it into the stadium.

And like, he

winds up, let's go.

And right as he's letting go of the rock, a dude walks out onto the bleachers.

And I'm like, oh, no.

He throws the rock in this beautiful arc, and he makes it in the stadium.

And

the rock comes down, hits the bleachers pretty close to this guy.

And the guy looks back at us and starts screaming something, but it's hard to hear.

And the dude who threw the rock starts screaming back.

And I'm like, this isn't good.

Yeah, it's screaming back.

Right.

They start arguing.

Everybody I know.

No, no, no.

And then the dude in the stadium like turns his back and like just keeps walking down the bleachers.

And then, you know, he walks out of the stadium.

There's one car in the parking lot.

And you can see him, he puts his, he's got like a backpack, puts his backpack in.

It's a hatchback, I think.

He opens up the trunk of the hatchback, puts his, you know, bag in, and pulls out a giant machete

and starts running at the hill slash mountain.

And I'm like, fuck.

So

We all start running down the mountain and like

he's like chasing us down through the campus which is empty.

Like I said, there's nobody there so there's nobody you can ask for help.

That's a fucking horror movie.

Yeah, so

I think I get away and I'm like walking down this empty street like trying to walking back, trying to leave campus and around the corner comes that car screeching.

And then like it flies down the road past me and like slams on the brakes and then I can hear it put in a park and the dude jumps out with that machete still in his hands, starts running after me.

I'm like, fuck.

So I go to like the nearest building I can, start pulling on all the doors and I find one that's open.

And you said it's like a horror movie, like trying to go up and down the stairs in the building, trying to like lose him.

And eventually I go out like the other side and I lose him somehow in the staircase.

Has he got the machete the whole time?

He's got the machete the whole time.

Get back to

his car and driven off.

I was like, man, what a fucking nightmare.

So anyway, I don't like El Paso.

Yeah, I guess so.

You think that guy's still looking for you?

Gus is like, I can't get back El Paso.

That's not safe.

He's on a slow march to Austin.

I just want to say, it was a mistake.

I didn't throw it.

It was my friend who threw it and who talked all the shit.

I was just there.

I didn't do anything.

God damn.

So, anyway, funny.

That's El Paso.

Well, don't throw rocks in El Paso.

There you go.

Well, I think that'll do it for Anma.

I don't know that we can end on something else other than that.

That's really good.

Again, if you want to send us questions, you can at Anmo Podcast, Twitter, and Instagram.

R/slash Anmopodcast is the subreddit that we do not run.

Check it out.

You can also go to anarchymeaningthing.com.

Check out.

I'll put some pictures.

Pictures or something.

I don't know.

I'll put the

sexy pump tree there.

Go listen to next week's episode there.

Just go to the website.

We got a hit counter, right?

Yes, I do want to say I love that people are still trying to fight over what President's Day is.

Oh, it's the other day someone was like, it's in February.

Like, just totally different.

Like, oh, awesome.

Please keep it up.

Keep the map going.

I really like people who are posting and going, hey, I tried to sign the guest book and it says that I'm a bot and it won't let me do it.

And then they'll post the CAPTCHA and they'll be like, I entered it.

It's this.

And then everyone going, it's not what it is.

Yeah, it's not it.

You got it wrong.

And if they're going, I might be a robot.

Yeah, this might be a difficult feature.

It's like, it's very clearly not the thing you're typing.

So if you're getting IP banned on the guest book, just know that you are a robot.

And

I mean, that's it.

You're a robot.

Beep, boop, beep.

10001.

Don't.

That used a swear word.

All right.

Well, that'll do it for Anma.

Any parting words for...

Oh, look at that little corgi.

Any parting words for the folks at home?

Stay away from El Paso.

Don't roll around in grass.

Fake grass.

Yeah.

All grass.

Bye.

Yo, this is important, man.

My favorite Lululemon shorts, the ones you got me back in the day, I think they're pacebreakers, the ones with all the pockets.

Well, I just got back from vacation, and I think I left them in my hotel room.

And dude, I need to replace these shorts.

I wear them like every day with that Lulu hoodie you got me.

Could you send me the link to where you got them?

Thanks, bro.

Talk soon.

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