S5E7 - Apollo and Hermes

stories featured in Greaking Out are original adaptations of classic Greek myths.

Today's story features a crisis of self-image, parents uninterested in mediating fights, practical jokes, and an impromptu dance party.

Orpheus and Eurydice, Andromeda and Perseus, Eros and Psyche, we've told a lot of romantic tales over the past seasons here at Greaking Out, and for good reason.

It's hard to resist a beautiful love story.

But love comes in lots of forms and takes many different shapes.

It's not just romance that's worth paying attention to.

All loving relationships are important, especially friendship.

Friendship is scientifically proven to be beneficial to the human race.

People with a community of friends have less tension and stress in their lives and have proven to live longer than those without a sufficient social network.

Exactly.

We're not just making this stuff up.

Friendship is important, people.

And today's episode is all about one such friendship.

The bromance between Apollo and Hermes.

For listeners of an older generation, A bromance is defined as a close but platonic relationship between two individuals who identify as male.

Right.

And in this case, the word bromance is especially relevant because the two men in question are actually brothers, Apollo and Hermes.

Correction.

They are half-brothers.

Zeus is father to both Apollo and Hermes, but they have different mothers.

I guess that's a good point, considering Zeus seems to be everybody's father in Greek mythology.

Apollo was the son of Leto and the twin brother of the goddess Artemis, while Hermes' mother was Maya, Atlas's oldest daughter.

But anyway, as brothers and friends, the relationship didn't exactly start off on the right foot.

The bromance began on shaky ground.

Apollo, the older brother, was known for being a little bit of a serious guy.

Apollo is the Greek god of many things, including light, music, poetry, prophecy, and knowledge.

Exactly.

And correct me if I'm wrong, Oracle, but he wasn't exactly known for his his sense of humor.

I cannot find a confirmation of this claim, but I think it is a fairly safe assumption.

But Hermes, on the other hand, was the typical little brother.

He was a trickster and always tried to make people laugh.

Hermes eventually became the Greek god of trade, wealth, luck, and thievery.

He was also the messenger of the gods and was speculated to be the cleverest among all the Olympians.

Right, so he was a smart, outgoing guy who had a bit of a devilish streak.

This was evident from the start.

Hermes was a restless little kid.

He was so ready to prove himself to the world, but was often told he had to stay behind because he wasn't mature enough.

No one really took him seriously.

His older brother, Apollo, had the exact opposite reputation.

He was known for being serious and reliable.

He was trustworthy.

He was, in a word, respectable.

He had done many great things, and he was most known for killing a giant python, actually.

Have I mentioned that Apollo is my least favorite god?

Sorry, Oracle.

We all know how much you love snakes, but if it makes you feel any better, Apollo was trying to avenge his mother.

A pitiful excuse for killing a magnificent creature.

Okay, you know what?

Let's just move on.

Like many little brothers, Hermes both resented and idolized his older sibling.

So one day, and it's still unclear whether this decision was made out of boredom or affection, Hermes decided to play a trick on Apollo just to see how he would react.

Hermes found Apollo's herd of cattle out grazing in the pasture.

Despite his lack of basic respect for the animal kingdom, Apollo was the herdsman of the gods and was responsible for overseeing cattle.

Yeah, and when Hermes saw the cattle unattended, well, he couldn't resist playing a trick on his big brother.

After all, Apollo was so darn serious about those cows.

Hermes, who was still a little baby at the time, had to make him lighten up a bit, at least about livestock.

He wanted to steal the cattle at first, but just stealing them wasn't enough.

He had to convince Apollo his cows had just disappeared.

So Hermes, crafty baby that he was, switched all of the cows' hooves around so that they were on backwards.

That's improbable.

Well, maybe so, but he did it.

And when he unlocked the gates and led the herd down to the river, the hoof prints the cows made looked like they were going towards the cattle pen instead of away from it.

He even went so far as to walk backwards himself and then, once by the river, made himself special shoes that would leave no prints at all.

He led the cows into a cave for safekeeping so they would be harder to find.

And as you can imagine, Apollo was frantic.

The cows were gone, every last one of them.

He couldn't find them anywhere.

Now, many of the gods were,

let's say, unreliable and didn't do the things that they were supposed to do.

I mean, Apollo only had to think of his own father, Zeus, to know the gods kind of had a reputation for doing whatever they wanted.

But Apollo was different.

He was the god of knowledge, of light.

He, at least, should be dependable.

Brother, Apollo called to Hermes, have you seen my cows?

They were just here.

I don't know what cows are, brother, Hermes responded.

I'm just a baby, but if I did, I wouldn't know where yours are.

Apollo was panicking.

His entire self-image was at stake here.

He questioned everyone in sight, but no one had any idea what happened to the cattle.

Meanwhile, Hermes was beside himself with laughter.

Apollo was freaking out and it was quality entertainment.

But after a day or so, the prank started to fizzle out.

Hermes realized that he'd actually managed to steal himself a job.

Cattle needed a lot of care and it was getting very old, very fast.

He knew he had to get the cows back to Apollo eventually, but he wanted to do so in style.

So he waited until the middle of the night and led the cattle back into their old pen.

He wanted it to seem as though the cows had just appeared and disappeared.

But he left the hooves backwards because, well, that was too funny not to be appreciated by everyone.

Cows' hooves are made of keratin, the same thing your nails are made out of.

and need to be trimmed and properly maintained in order to prevent injury.

Well, Hermes didn't trim them because he wasn't the best at livestock management, but he did leave the gate open so they could wander.

On average, a cow walks two to three miles per hour.

But when startled or running, cows can reach speeds up to 20 miles per hour.

Seriously?

Who knew cows were that fast?

Anyway, the next morning, Apollo woke up to a strange mooing sound.

Moo!

Moo!

Moo!

Moo!

He ran outside and he couldn't believe his eyes.

The cows were back!

Well, some of them were.

Some of them were chilling in the neighboring field.

Some had wandered down the road, but that wasn't the weirdest part.

When Apollo looked closely, he saw that each and every hoof print made by the cows was backwards.

This was truly puzzling to Apollo.

While most animals prefer to walk forward, many animals walk backward when necessary.

Some species can't walk backward at all, like kangaroos and emus.

Well, that's true, but this wasn't some weird animal behavior that Apollo had been unaware of.

He picked up the cows' feet and examined them each closely to see the backward hooves.

And then, quite suddenly, Apollo had a strong suspicion about who had done this.

Hermes, he exclaimed when he found his little brother lounging by the riverside, what did you do to my cattle?

What cattle?

Hermes replied innocently.

My cows.

Why are their hooves backwards?

You mean they didn't always look that way?

Are you sure?

Turn them back now.

How could I, a small child, manage to fool a big, impressive god such as yourself?

Apollo looked at Hermes.

He had him there.

And so, he did what all brothers do when they're fighting.

Come on.

We're going to go talk to Zeus.

Really?

You're telling dad on me?

But Apollo didn't care.

He was furious with Hermes.

He was always getting into trouble and messing with Apollo's things.

It was time for some payback.

Now, Zeus is always here for the drama.

You may have noticed, but Zeus loves a mess.

Here, mess refers to a metaphorical mess of emotions, not the physical mess you might have in your room.

But as the leader of the gods on Mount Olympus, he had a lot of bigger fish to fry, and he didn't want to encourage these kids to come to him with all of their problems all the time.

Why are you including me in your fights?

Work it out yourselves, he said, knowing this wouldn't discourage them.

And it didn't.

Apollo would not leave until Zeus heard all about the terrible things Hermes had done.

He stole my cows, he hid them from me, and I looked everywhere for them and I couldn't find them.

And then he did something weird to their feet.

Something weird to their feet?

Go on.

Zeus listened in horror, fascination, and plain admiration for Hermes' absolutely wild method of cattle theft.

But Zeus kept it all inside, because as the father, he knew he had to be fair.

Boys, Zeus began, you're going to have to work things out amongst yourselves.

Your brothers, these things happen.

I trust you can figure out a solution, but Hermes, let's start with fixing those feet, please.

Hermes shrugged his shoulders indifferently.

Well, I'll see what I can do, he replied.

After their conversation with Zeus, after which Zeus told absolutely everyone about Hermes' great prank, the two brothers walked back to the pasture in silence.

Hermes was ready to move on, but Apollo was still clearly brooding about the situation, which kind of makes sense.

I mean, it's not often that someone makes the god of knowledge look foolish and live to tell the tale.

You know, I'm feeling a commercial break right now.

I think this is a good place to take a moment.

We'll get a break.

We'll come back with more greaking out in just a little bit.

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It didn't take Hermes long to fix the cattle's hooves.

Soon they were all back in the proper field and moving in the correct direction.

The problem was solved.

But Apollo was still upset.

He turned and walked away from Hermes without another word.

He didn't even answer when Hermes called out to him.

Hey, Apollo,

Apollo, what do you think?

Apollo?

Nothing?

Okay.

No, I'm good.

Yes, it appeared that Apollo was employing a classic form of sibling retaliation known as the silent treatment.

Different cultures view silence in conversation differently.

In some cultures, silence in a conversation means deliberate thought and attention, and in other cultures, it means that conversation is awkward and not going well.

Now, Hermes isn't one to admit he was wrong.

He certainly doesn't apologize, but he was feeling a little bad about what happened with Apollo.

It was his big brother, after all.

He didn't want Apollo to hate him forever.

It would be kind of a bummer if the two never managed to fix things.

Yes, Hermes thought, an older brother might come in handy at some point in an immortal's life.

So he decided he would make amends with Apollo and win back his affection.

And so, Hermes did what many of us would do in a similar situation.

He got Apollo a present.

Hermes knew that Apollo loved music, but he had never seen him actually play anything.

So he thought a musical instrument might be the perfect gift.

He looked around for some inspiration and saw a tortoise crawling through the grass.

Suddenly, he knew exactly what to do.

He took the tortoise's shell, grabbed some reeds from the river, and made the first ever seven-stringed lyre.

And after Hermes invented it, the lyre became one of the most popular instruments in ancient Greece.

The first ever musical instrument that we know of is a bone flute made by Neanderthals 60,000 years ago.

But Hermes didn't want to become the first lyre rock star.

Instead, he wanted to give it to Apollo as a peace offering.

So he went back to the pasture to find Apollo hanging out by his cattle.

He seemed determined not to take his eyes off of them.

He did not even acknowledge Hermes when he walked up.

Hi, Apollo!

Hermes began.

I know you're still angry with me about the whole cattle thing, and while I really wish you would lighten up and learn how to take a joke, I do understand that this whole situation was very frustrating for you.

Apollo looked at Hermes, unsure where this speech was going.

So I, uh, I made something for you.

It's probably silly, but I know you like music, so I made you this thing.

I'm calling it a liar, he said as he handed it to Apollo.

Apollo looked at the instrument closely.

He turned it over in his hands, and then He plucked one of the strings.

The sound was beautiful, something completely different and unique.

Apollo looked up at Hermes with a huge smile on his face.

Thank you, he said.

And then, out of nowhere, ancient Greece's very first jam session occurred right there in the grazing field.

Apollo played the lyre and Hermes started singing and dancing and the two of them got completely swept up in the music.

When the song finished, the two brothers grinned at each other.

That was fun, Hermes said.

Yes, it was, Apollo agreed.

Thanks for making me this.

I have a feeling it's going to get a lot of use.

And it did.

Apollo's Lyre is legendary.

It's one of his most prized possessions, and it's included in several Greek stories and myths.

Listeners may remember Apollo's Lyre way back in season two during the Orpheus and Eurydice episode.

Exactly.

That lyre became a family heirloom.

But before all that, it was a token, a token of friendship and love from Hermes to Apollo.

And it worked beautifully.

It even inspired Hermes to apologize.

Look, Apollo, he began, I really am sorry about the whole cattle thing.

I was joking around, but I didn't understand how it would affect you, and I'm sorry.

I promise never to mess with your possessions again.

Thank you, Apollo said.

But maybe you're you're right.

Maybe I do need to learn to take a jump.

I like having you around, Hermes.

Hermes was touched.

No one had ever said that to him before, especially not his cooler, wiser, older brother.

I like hanging out with you, too.

For the next several days, Apollo was obsessed with playing the liar.

It was his new favorite possession.

He loved it so much that he decided he needed to get a gift for Hermes in return.

He wanted something that would symbolize his trust in his little brother.

He thought about it and thought about it and thought about it and eventually he came up with the perfect idea.

He finally tracked Hermes down and gave him a golden shepherd's staff called a caduceus.

The caduceus was a beautiful winged staff covered with two intertwining, stunning serpents.

Hermes looked at it slowly.

A stick, he said, trying to summon up some excitement about this strange gift.

Cool.

It's not just a stick, Apollo said.

It's what it symbolizes.

I spoke to Zeus, and he has agreed to give you a job.

A real job.

Really?

Hermes was shocked.

All he wanted was to be respected by the gods, but he hadn't had a chance to prove himself yet.

This was his opportunity.

Yes, said Apollo.

I convinced him to let you be messenger of the gods.

So that's what the Canocius is for.

All the messengers have one, even Iris.

Iris was the goddess of the rainbow and the personal messenger of Hera.

That's amazing!

Hermes exclaimed.

Thank you so much.

And from that moment on, the two brothers were thick as thieves.

They got into many adventures together and always had each other's backs.

Apollo continued to look out for his little brother.

Hermes did the same for Apollo, and he kept his promise about never messing with his brother's cows again.

So while romances are fine and dandy, friendships and family relationships can be just as important.

We all need people who choose to love and accept us for who we are.

Sometimes these people are the family we're born with.

Sometimes they're the family we choose ourselves.

And sometimes they're one of the dozens of half siblings we may have.

And sure, we might mess with their stuff and bug them from time to time.

They might annoy us and drive us crazy.

But no matter what, we know that they will always be there when it counts.

So today's lesson, never underestimate the power of a good bromance.

That's all we have for today.

We have one more episode left this season, and it'll be coming next week.

Get ready for magic, an island, and a lot of personal growth.

Listen, and you'll see it creaking

National Geographic Kids Greaking Out is written by Kenny Curtis and Jillian Hughes and hosted by Kenny Curtis, with Tori Kerr as the oracle of Wi-Fi, audio production and sound design by Scotty Beam, and our theme song was composed by Perry Gripp.

Dr.

Diane Klein is our subject matter expert, and Emily Everhart is our producer.