Heavyweight Check In 5

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I was just at a theme park in Florida Florida with my almost four-year-old.

Between enjoying the sunshine and the rides, the last thing I wanted to worry about was my wallet.

That's why AppleCard with Apple Pay saved my vacation.

One tap, a check-in, and I was off to see the attractions.

Every purchase from hot dogs, and oh, we had hot dogs, to t-shirts earned me daily cash.

Unlike waiting in line for a ride, there's no waiting until the end of the month for rewards.

And my daily cash is automatically deposited into the savings account I opened through Apple Card, where it earns interest.

With Apple Pay's secure technology built right into my iPhone and Apple Watch, I pay to shops, restaurants, and attractions without ever digging from my wallet.

The best part?

No fees, no hassles.

I spent less time managing my money and more time doing nothing short of epic.

Apply for Apple Card in the wallet app on your iPhone.

Subject to credit approval.

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Pushkin

Hello.

Kalila.

Hello.

Let me get Stevie.

Hang on.

Hello.

Hi.

Hey.

Hey.

How are we?

Stevie.

I actually had a really great weekend.

What did you do?

I saw two friends this weekend.

As in real life?

Yeah.

Yeah.

My friends Peter and Leo.

And, you know, we stayed six feet apart and everything, but like...

Like, I saw friends.

And it's been so long since I've seen

in person a friend.

Yeah.

I was waiting for them outside and I heard Peter go, you know, Stevie.

And it was like

immediately I felt like I was like lighter, you know, like it really lifted something and I left feeling really light.

Like,

I don't know.

I don't really.

Yeah.

It was very hard to resist the urge to just go over and like give them a hug.

It was like

fighting with that, you know.

Yeah.

I also saw people for the first time,

you know, ten feet apart this weekend.

My in-laws,

they came by.

I think it was nice for Aggie.

Occasionally, of course, like he would forget and kind of run towards them and we'd have to pull him back.

And I think those were the moments that felt the roughest because, you know, it's sort of like you're you're negating this natural, wonderful tendency to run towards people that you love.

Yeah.

So, um, Augie and his grandparents were exchanging knock-knock jokes.

Augie, I got another one for you.

Knock-knock.

Who's there?

Ach.

Hachu.

Kazoo type.

All of Augie's knock-knock jokes made no sense.

Knock-knock!

Who's there?

Emlins, a doctor.

Dr.

Nasmagua!

Yeah, so that was kind of

it was a mixed bag, but

it was kind of nice.

Yeah.

Kalila, and what have you been up to?

How was your weekend?

Just something about like this past week, especially.

Like...

I don't know.

I think it just hit the point of really sort of feeling like gray.

Like,

I feel like I really was like hitting a point of like despair kind of.

So this weekend,

sorry, you guys, I don't know why I'm getting so emotional.

It's okay.

Yeah.

Yeah.

So, well, so one thing we did this weekend, which is you and your boyfriend?

Yeah, me and Sam, my boyfriend, got a zip car for yesterday to just like go somewhere else.

Which ended up being nice.

Like we had a nice day,

but the planning of it sort of just like made us both feel worse because we were like, oh, like everything is closed.

Like, it just really made it feel like, oh, there's like nowhere.

There's like nothing to do.

And we ended up going to

Fort Dalden and walking along the beach and having lunch out there, which was nice.

Yeah.

And then in the evening, I watched a movie, which is like all I've been doing is watching a ton of movies.

But I miss like going to a movie theater, like going to the movies.

So I made popcorn on the stove.

Two table since oil.

Which I'd never made it on the stove before.

Like I'd had it with my family that way, but I'd never just done it myself.

And you've had popcorn in a movie theater.

Yes, I've had plenty of popcorn in a movie theater.

I once ate so much popcorn in a movie theater that I threw up afterwards.

This was as a child, I'm assuming?

Nope, this was like two years ago.

Really?

So sad.

No, that sounds like living the dream.

How can you be sure that it was from overeating popcorn?

This has happened to me before.

I think the problem is if I don't eat dinner and then I eat just popcorn with a lot of movie theater butter on it, it like makes me a little nauseous, but I love it, so I always eat it anyway.

Wow.

So you, so you really love popcorn?

I love popcorn, yeah.

And did you use the technique of like where you wait for the first kernel to pop and then you start shaking the pan vigorously?

Yeah, and actually when I heard the first one, I was like,

is that a pop?

That sounded like a pop.

Really makes you question yourself.

Yeah, it does.

But it turned out really well.

And I melted real butter to put on it.

Did it make you less nauseous?

Yeah, it actually did.

Hey, success.

You didn't throw up?

I didn't throw up.

Was there like something just about having popcorn to watch a movie with?

Yeah, it was nice.

Yeah.

I mean, it did make it feel more of like an event instead of just like filling the time, I guess.

There's something like just about the sound of popcorn popping that I think is like universally one of the most wonderful sounds.

Yeah, it's great.

I think we're in business here.

You know what else I've been up to?

What?

And this is going to cheer you up.

This is going to cheer us all up.

Okay.

You ready for some good cheer?

I guess.

I decided that as a special surprise, I was going to check in with some favorite people from the show.

People that we and America and parts of Canada have grown to love.

Like who?

My old friend Gregor.

A favorite indeed.

We talked for a while.

He's homeschooling his kids.

He's taking on their education.

And we got to talking.

And

do you remember a young man named Joey?

Yeah, how could I forget?

How could we forget?

Two seasons ago,

Gregor and I went to Los Angeles to help him.

He had been banned from his favorite pizzeria and he, Joey's kind of a sloppy guy and he was having trouble with his roommates.

Of which there were many, many.

Yes, yeah, many, many, many roommates.

And so Gregor and I had kind of decided that we would give Joey a call, check in with him and see how he's doing during this quarantine.

There was something that happened during the course of our telephone call

that kind of made Gregor and I feel really good about having called him in the first place because it seemed like he was still in need of our help.

Joey.

Is this who I think it is?

Good to hear your voice.

Guess who I have on the line here?

It's me, Joey.

The one and only.

You sound exactly the same, only healthier.

I think I am healthier than the last time we were together.

Yeah, you radiate health.

My diet is a little more varied than it was when we last spoke.

When it was just pizza.

Yeah, I've moved on from day-old cold pizza to some actual veggies now.

Come on, what do you got in your CRISPR drawer, Joey?

The house, my house just went to the grocery store yesterday.

So, okay, we got eggplant,

lemons and limes.

Oh, leeks.

That's a fun one.

Whoever has a leak?

I think we can pause you there.

Joey, do you still have that mustache?

Yeah, yeah.

And I'm growing a quarantine beard as well.

Are you still keeping up with your rollerblading?

For the most part, I mean, it's kind of slowed down because it's not super fun to rollerblade in a mask.

I think last we left Joey, he had a roommate situation.

That's right.

So now, what's your deal?

Are you living on your own?

I'm living in a much better better situation now.

Living in a duplex apartment with six other boys, so you know, a little tight quarters.

How many roommates did you have back when?

I think it was five.

And now you can see that.

And I upset by one.

Yeah.

But it's a bigger space.

It's like a real house.

I'll admit I still am in a curtained off kind of makeshift living room, turn-bedroom deal.

Wait, so you still have bed sheets for walls?

Yeah.

Only one wall this time, as opposed to all of them.

I got to say, no offense to Joey, but Johnny, I think your craftsmanship in fixing Joey's life is questionable.

No, it's way better.

He's picked up another roommate and he's got a sheet for a wall again.

Why all of a sudden when Joey's not doing well, all of a sudden he's my son, Joey?

Well, he was your charge.

You said, I'm going to get this guy out of his like.

No, we were both.

No, that's the thing.

See, I'm giving you credit for elevating my life and lifting me out of where I was.

See, I'm doing a lot better now.

I just picture him on his rollerblades on a slight grade where he's rolling back down and not realizing it's going backwards down the hill.

Okay, but downhills are always the funnest part of rollerblading.

So you you're you have now six roommates?

Yep.

We've all been friends for years since college.

You're pitching in.

I'd say so.

But lately since quarantine started,

it seems like the other roommates in the house have kind of doubled down on trying to keep things clean, which, you know, I get.

We're spending more time at home.

Things get messy easier.

But to me, like,

I can't, you know, clean every crumb every single time.

Like, that's just going a little too far.

And so this started really getting to one of my roommates.

Every time I would leave a single crumb, a single knife in the sink, he would like confront me head on.

And this really just blew up the other morning.

Like when I woke up and the first thing I hear is just him like beckoning me into the kitchen to say, is this your knife?

Is this yours?

And like, he just wanted to just get into it as my first thing I hear in the morning.

And I just really couldn't, like, I needed to avoid confrontation.

So I just basically ran away and like said, I can't hear this right now.

Now, Joey, when you went back to your room, like, this would be a situation where one might slam their door.

What, what do you, what do you do?

No, I did.

I mean, I tried to do the same.

I retreated to my room.

Um, but the difference is he was able to just walk like right on the other side of the curtain and like speak to me.

So five minutes later, you push the curtain aside or you crawl under the curtain.

I'll push it it aside.

Just painting an image in my mind.

Okay.

Because it's less dignified when you frog crawl out from under your curtain to get yelled at.

No, it's better than that.

But no, he did come around and

try to talk to me through the curtain and just said, I'm here to talk when you want to.

So did you ever end up having that conversation with him?

No.

Nope.

Instead,

he ended up sending me a text, like, I think a few hours later, that was actually an apology.

He wrote, my approach was not the right one, and I apologize.

I haven't felt great this week.

I've been overly sensitive.

And then he goes, no need to respond.

Just wanted to send this to you so you knew where I was at.

I really care for you and don't want it to hurt you or cause division between us.

Wow.

I only, wow, okay.

Did you not read this text until now?

I read it.

I read it just one time.

I mean, I was still definitely kind of heated when I got it.

I think you just heard Joey digesting the second and last emotional phrase of that text.

That was definitely a thing for the first time.

Wait, I mean, we don't usually talk like that.

So that's pretty surprising, though.

Okay.

And then

what was your next text back to him?

So he said no need to respond, but I figured I would just let him know I got it.

And so I just wrote thanks.

Did you send it as an emoji or you actually wrote it?

And that's it, just thanks.

I accepted his apology.

I mean,

how long ago did you get this text from your roommate?

I think it was about a week ago now.

Were you to call him over and say, hey, I'm partly to blame for this whole

knife situation also, he would know what you're talking about.

Yeah.

Oh, yeah.

But wait, but first my question is, I mean, do I owe him an apology?

I think we need to address that first.

Gregor?

This roommate seems like a prince.

He's like, I'm sorry, I yelled at you for leaving your filthy knife and crumbs on the floor.

You're important to me, and I cherish you, and I cherish our time together.

Did he use the word cherish?

I don't think he, I don't think that's part of his vocabulary.

Point is, Joey should pick up after himself.

This is not some complicated equation.

All right.

So

you're saying that Joey owes him a little bit of an apology, a reciprocal apology.

If you live by yourself and you're a disgusting slob, you're reprehensible, but at least you're your only victim.

If you live with six dudes, if everyone leaves a knife in the sink, you got a forest full of knives in the sink.

You're all under house confinement.

I think it's time to be super persnickety.

So he could have been nicer about it, but I still think he's apologizing for giving you some harsh treatment.

I think you need to step up your game.

I think you're right.

I'm totally fine with you like sleeping with your dirty socks next to your bed.

That's in your sheeted-off quadrant of the living room.

But you can't leave food around.

That's just not good.

So what is your roommate?

What is his name?

His name is Pathin.

Is Paven within shouting distance right now?

I am tucked away in like the closet

doing the recording.

Can you do it in a muffled yell from inside your closet?

No, maybe open up the closet door and...

Okay, let me get out of the closet here.

And it's going to take me some work to weasel my way out of here because I'm like...

Now, while Joey struggles to get out of his closet studio,

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I was just at a theme park in Florida with my almost four-year-old.

Between enjoying the sunshine and the rides, the last thing I wanted to worry about was my wallet.

That's why AppleCard with Apple Pay saved my vacation.

One tap, a check-in, and I was off to see the attractions.

Every purchase from hot dogs, and oh, we had hot dogs, to t-shirts earned me daily cash.

Unlike waiting in line for a ride, there's no waiting until the end of the month for rewards.

And my daily cash is automatically deposited into the savings account I opened through AppleCard, where it earns interest.

With Apple Pays, secure technology built right into my iPhone and Apple Watch, I pay to shops, restaurants, and attractions without ever digging from my wallet.

The best part?

No fees, no hassles.

I spent less time managing my money and more time doing nothing short of epic.

Apply for Apple Card in the wallet app on your iPhone.

Subject to credit credit approval.

Savings available to Apple Card owners subject to eligibility.

Variable APRs for Apple Card range from 18.24% to 28.49% based on credit worthiness.

Rates as of July 1st, 2025.

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And we're back.

We're back.

Let's just join Joey as he struggles to get out of the closet and

on with his life.

It's also a thousand degrees in there, so it feels good to get some fresh air.

Hold on.

I'm climbing over the desk right now.

Oh boy.

Okay.

Alright, so yeah, I'll also mention that Paven's room is the one right next to mine, so he, we almost share a room really that's curtained off.

Um, but yeah, here he is now.

So

hey, Paven.

Yeah.

Listen, um, I kind of wanted to apologize actually for for what happened like last week.

I think you probably know what I'm talking about.

I do know what you're talking about.

Yeah

so

I know that you sent me a very like thoughtful message and I thank you for it.

That was really nice.

Probably took a lot for you to do that.

Yeah, I just, you know, it's a really heightened time and I didn't want to.

It could have been handled better on both sides.

I agree.

Thank you.

Thank you a lot.

I don't know if I fully said it, but I apologize for

leaving things around.

I know it's my responsibility with this as a community.

Thank you so much.

Thank you.

I mean, it's just nice to know that we're on the same page because then there's no tension in the house and

things are going well.

So yeah, you're doing a great job, man.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thanks for keeping things clean.

Yeah, you got it.

Joey.

Joey.

Joey, that was magnificent.

That was so good.

Really?

From the last time that we were with you, I mean, you've come so far.

Yeah, that was really straightforward.

And I was getting ready to start sweating when you said, I want to talk to you.

and instead you were just clear concise really spit it out it was great yeah i think you definitely appreciated that and i feel better too it was great i mean this is the kind of skill set that only a goldstein can give you to deal with your roommates and a gregor no it's all you johnny see before we were both trying to pawn joey off on each other and look at us now the whole time you were talking all i could picture was the fade and johnny comes on in his dulcet voice where he's like and so it is the roommates and he does that fade out talk and so it is that the roommates roommates were reconciled and the apartment found peace once again.

So I spoke with another favorite, who?

Steve Marsh from the marshes.

From the titular marshes.

Do you remember Steve?

Of course.

He likes his Seagrams and 7-Up ayahuasca plants.

We did an episode with Steve about how, as an adult, he'd found out out that his parents had had a kid before he was born that they had put up for adoption and that they never told him or anyone about.

And Steve and I said about trying to find her.

So I checked in with Steve to see how he's weathering this pandemic and he still needs a little help from Jonathan Goldstein.

Can you hear me?

I can.

Can you hear me?

Yeah.

How's your headspace?

Because I know

you're a pretty social person.

Yeah, that's been my my biggest thing.

So

I love meeting new people and it kind of wakes up my brain and it's one of the great pleasures of my life.

So now bereft of the chance to meet new people, your mind drifts to

people

like if you can't go outside, you go inside.

And so you have these memories and nostalgia for people that you haven't haven't talked to in a while.

Are you thinking of someone specifically?

Because we've been doing this thing lately where we're trying to connect people with friends that they've drifted from.

There's this woman, Mika, she's in Paris.

She got pissed at me.

And

when I was stuck in Africa, her now husband had to go to Paris Orly so I could get out of Gabon.

Wait, wait, hang on a second.

Back up.

You were stuck in France?

I was stuck in Africa.

what what happened my friend uh was in a movie uh about people going to gabon africa to do ibega which is this uh psychedelic route and i went down there and i met them and and i was like i want to try ibega and i did and i went into like a fugue state for like 48 hours and i missed my flight back holy cat and this was pleasant No, it's horrible.

Like a waking nightmare kind of thing.

And it was weird.

Like I, so I did like 30 spoonfuls of the, they grind up this ibega into a powder, about 30 spoonfuls of it.

And then I also did an additional

how much of the sawdust through an enema at the same time.

So the, so, God, this does not sound appealing.

It's like you're eating like basically like a large breakfast bowl of this, of this

sawdust, of like highly acidic sawdust and then when you're done with that they're like no no no now comes the enema yeah they're like oh you're you haven't had enough you're not getting you're like because i was like uh i was like oh i don't i can't do it i can't do it anymore i was being a baby and and they're like okay well come into this hut and we'll give you an enema what what what recollections do you have from those 48 hours anything stick with you

um well they they uh they ask you like to describe what you what you see

and i was like i saw some like flickering I'm like the lantern, you know, so then that becomes that's my Ibega name like I'm like whatever the African equivalent of flickering and the lantern is which is like who doesn't see flickering in the lantern I was kind of quasi seeing this Woman in Minnesota at the time and I I felt like she was

not just seeing me, you know,

I focused on those kind of paranoid feelings until I went into this like, yeah, grayed out fugue state for four or eight hours.

And then to come to and realize that Moroccan Air isn't going to refund my ticket

unless somebody can appear on my behalf at the Paris-Orly airport.

Why would someone have to, why would that be the terms of getting reimbursement on your ticket?

No, no, you need it.

It's like, I don't know.

So she had to go to this airport in France.

her husband did and i think mika just found the whole escapade to be irresponsible and uh has really never never forgiven me and that that that was the end of your friendship yeah

how long was it since you last had actual contact oh man so this was in

This is like right before May and I started dating.

So like eight years ago?

So like then I think it was like a couple years later or something.

I was like, hey, you know, i might be coming through town and she's like i don't want to see you

oh

and was that the last contact you had with her that was it yeah

and i i love mika like mika's um she has a great laugh man i used to love making mika laugh um

i guess it's one of the few kind of um

the few people in my life that uh i've really uh hurt them

do you want to reach out just to say, you know, like see how she's doing in the midst of all this?

Yeah, man, that might be nice.

That might be nice.

Then maybe I could actually

apologize to her maybe formally.

Because you never have, really.

I don't think so.

Is she still in Paris?

Yeah.

Because I think it's right now it's midnight in Paris.

This calling her midnight might make things worse.

Yeah.

Yeah.

So on behalf of Steve, I ended up just sending Mika an email

and she said,

yeah, sure, we can get on the telephone.

So,

so that's what we did.

Oh, you hear that European classy ringtone?

I do.

That's it's better than you, that ringtone.

Better than me.

Hello.

Mika?

Hold on, let me put on my headphones on.

Okay.

Well, I don't.

Should I be talking?

I don't know.

I didn't didn't think of it.

Hello.

Hello.

Hey, Steve.

I hear Steve.

Hey, man.

How are you?

How are you?

I'm good, man.

I miss you.

I was just thinking, I was talking to Jonathan and Christophe, having to drop everything and bail me out of my Iboga stupor in Africa and

inviting that Condonas guy, the photographer, to like crash your place.

And

your mom like walked in on

the shit.

I'm really sorry to interrupt.

Mika, forgive me but wait what what what is we we talked about the the whole uh drug thing but what what is the what is the thing about the the photographer oh well like what um mika had gone on vic on a family vacation and uh she let me stay in her crib okay and then um i was out with a a condonest photographer and he didn't have a place to stay that night and i volunteered Mika's place without asking her permission.

Oh, like, wait, so, so, on top of the whole other thing, there was also this

guy,

yeah, Stephen.

I know.

I mean, Mika, that's the thing.

Like, honestly, like, I'm sorry for all of it and for Christophe as well.

And I feel like I estranged myself from you by acting like such a ugly American.

I mean,

no, I was definitely wanting to help you out when you're in Africa.

When you called me, you were like, I'm desperate.

I need to get out of here.

So I was totally like, okay, we're going to get you out.

And Christophe is a really great guy.

And I was just like,

just tell him, thank you.

Please, like,

I don't know if I can swear in this, but like, you got to like

f as d or something.

Oh, I don't know that.

You better

as.

Right.

I think what was really problematic was that,

yeah, you invited your friend without telling me.

So when you asked me

a couple years afterward to come with your sweetie, I was like, I had to make a choice.

Like, do I want to

have another adventure and put up with like,

well,

it was kind of tricky when you came and it was a little bit,

for lack of a better word, high maintenance.

Right, right.

right

totally oh steve

i'm i mean i'm totally glad that you know we're friends and

i'm i'm really happy to talk to you now and i really appreciate you saying sorry and i thank you for that and

steve you're you're good people so

we're cool thanks mika

it's great to hear your voice man what's up steve how are you i'm good man

yeah

Yeah, I'm totally good.

How is Paris?

Like, how is...

You know, like, so in about 10 days or on the 11th, they're gonna have to

and hey, guess what?

That's our show.

That's it?

Okay.

Yeah.

Oh, but not quite yet.

Couple more things.

Oh, well, okay.

So that was a lie.

I wanted to mention that oftentimes people ask what they could do to help support the show.

And you know what?

Don't send us any money.

Don't send your jewelry.

All you have to do is

try to listen on Spotify.

You can listen anywhere you want, and we're appreciative of that.

But if you want to do us a solid listen on Spotify

because it won't hurt.

It'll help.

And what we've done to further entice is we've assembled a playlist of some of our favorite episodes as well as some of listener favorites.

This is called the Heavyweight Starter Kit.

If you search for that on Spotify, you'll find it.

And it's a lot of fun.

And there's a link in the show notes.

Yeah,

if you're into the whole clicking thing.

And another way that you guys can continue to support us is by sending in your emails with your stories and

just how you're doing at this time.

We really enjoy reading them.

And among the emails that we received this week was a song by a singer-songwriter named Connie Shee.

Hello, I am Connie Shee.

I am in Prospect Heights, Brooklyn, and I am currently in my bedroom on my floor looking out my window at other buildings.

So I am

having trouble processing my feelings about all this, and so I wrote a song about it, and I thought I would share it with you.

Every passing day, I feel a little worse about Zeus.

I was good for a while, filled my schedule with classes, got dressed in my makeup, even curled my eyelashes.

But a slump is so close, it might be here already.

I watched 10 episodes of community last night,

and my screenwriting class is a great group of people, but I don't think I'm a writer.

I'm more of a sleeper.

In my dreams, I can float.

I don't feel any pressure.

I am light as the weather.

Is it morning already?

Where is the sun?

I lost my marble somewhere in the bathroom.

And I can feel all my atoms are shaking with what can't be done.

It's hard to feel lucky without feeling guilty A soundtrack of sirens haunts and connects me The future feels heavy And I miss my mom

I've got no room to pace so my mind is what's running But it's more of a stumble with no distance I'm covering I know now is the time to create, but I'm hungry again

Is it morning already?

Where is the sun?

I lost my marble somewhere in the bathroom.

And I can feel all my atoms are shaking with what can't be done.

I know that something has ended and something's begun.

I just wish someone could give me more answers.

Or tell me, just close your eyes and then open when I get to one.

Hey there, it's Ryan Seacrest for Safeway.

Spooky season is quickly approaching, so time to stock up on all your favorite treats.

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Save on items like Hershey's, Reese's, Pumpkins, Snickers, miniatures, Tootsie Rolls, raw sugar, milk, chocolate, caramel, jack-o'-lanterns, Brock's candy corn, charms, mini pops, and more.

All friends, October 7th.

Restrictions apply.

Offers may vary.

Visit safeway.com for more details.

This is Jana Kramer from Windown with Jana Kramer.

Parents, can we talk diapers?

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Kevin and Rachel and Peanut MMs and an eight-hour road trip.

And Rachel's new favorite audiobook, The Cerulean Empress, Scoundrel's Inferno.

And Florian, the reckless yet charming scoundrel from said audiobook.

And his pecs glistened in the moonlight.

And Kevin, feeling weird because of all the talk about pecs, and Rachel handing him Peanut MMs to keep him quiet.

Kevin, I can't hear.

Yellow, we're keeping it PG-13.

MMs, it's more fun together.

This is an iHeart podcast.