New Year's Resolutions for NFL Podcasters

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The Heed the Call Podcast

wishes all you hedonists a happy and healthy new year.

Absolutely.

New Year's Eve, 2024.

Unbelievable.

I didn't think we'd ever make it to the end of this particular yellow brick road.

And to be doing this show on the final day of the year, what a blessing it is.

Dan Hansis, Mark Sessler, Connor Orr,

Justin Gravedigger on the ones and twos.

Happy New Year's Eve.

Mark, how are you doing?

What's your plan?

I see it.

Whoa, Cozy Inn

hoodie.

Love it.

Did not know the Cozy Inn, our old aunt

in Culver City, right down the road from the old offices

at NFL Media, had merch.

The fact that the Cozy Inn got their merch out before our show is really an indictment of us.

us, but it, you know, that's a cool shirt.

I want one.

It is telling.

Um, it's actually a sweatshirt and it's a heavy sweatshirt, and I'm in a room with no ventilation, so we'll see how this goes.

Um, probably how I how I go at the cozy for the most part.

Um, but yes, I wish that we could have.

I was thinking about buying one for the entire group, but it took the woman there

about 25 minutes to find this, so I didn't want to add too much labor to her to her docket.

Yes, Connor, you are a family man.

I I mean, I am as well.

And Mark, you are as well.

Like, we're all men with children.

Mark's like a PS on that.

Like, also, Mark, yeah.

But we don't know what you're doing for New Year's Eve.

You have a different setup.

You're in Hollywood.

I'm sure you're doing probably something

you wanted to do.

Well, it's very wholesome.

I'm having

my two sons up to enjoy the

night together.

Yeah, we're going to build a bunch of people.

For some reason, I kind of imagine you're going to like a rave or something tonight.

I get that.

I get that.

But I'm not in the mood for that.

Connor,

I love New Year's Eve as an adult, as a dad, as a husband, so much more than I loved it as a teenager.

And certainly in my 20s when it was just a giant source of anxiety on a number of levels.

Yeah.

The pressure of...

Like, I'm just thinking back to like getting tickets to this like club to go New Year's Eve and like, you know, figuring out an outfit that would get you in the door and how much you got to spend.

And then there's like no bathroom there.

And it's just like this whole, like, I remember being in a cab going from my buddy's apartment in

Midtown to this art gallery where they had had this like big trendy New Year's Eve party.

And like we had pre-gamed so much that like we were just in the middle of like, you know, Broadway.

And I was like, you have to pull over because I have to pee right now.

Like there's no...

And just like running running into like a Chinese restaurant and just screaming like, where's the bathroom?

And like that to me kind of, you know, juxtaposed that with my New Year's Eve now, which is so nice, you know, and I don't have to worry about that anymore, you know?

Yeah, that

gave me a flashback, especially if you grew up in the tri-state area.

when you would you would pay $100 to have access to one of the bars in New York City.

So they would charge that and that would give you an open bar and you would have a place to be.

But if you weren't 21 yet, you're online with a fake ID on New Year's Eve after you bust into the city or took the train into the city and everything's on the line.

I mean, and I, and then, of course, then you would go in there and

I remember one year there was like the coat check got foobarred out and everyone in like 2001 had the same like dark navy pea coat.

And I remember somebody stole my pea coat that I had just gotten for Christmas.

So I took someone else's pea coat that was in that closet.

Which is some real like New York dirtbag behavior.

But it had to happen.

It had to happen.

Anyway,

I can't wait for tonight.

It's going to be fun.

You do.

You can stay up till midnight.

You let them stay up.

We were able to.

Yeah.

Okay.

We started last year.

We took it as far as we could with like tricking them into the East Coast New Year, but now we let them roll till midnight.

Well, what's the harm in that?

And also, you've got your own pea coat now.

They've got their own pea coats.

Everyone's, you know more controlled i remember like again i didn't

i don't say it was a it's kind of a la raville magnifico that i went and i took someone else's coat but

and it wasn't for nine

but i remember it was it was a different time when you're in your 20s that i someone stole my old navy pea coat and i ended up with a j crew pea coat so Yeah, but also somehow the correct size and everything.

That's it was what I call a coup d'état on the final day of the year.

Now, I can only hope that the person person who stole my coat,

I took his coat, but there might be someone who's truly shit out of luck.

But anyway, we turn the page.

Coming up on today's show.

I was going to say, I think you would not be surprised that the centerpiece of my New Year's now involves cable television.

And

we

I Zoom with my college roommate and his wife, who are good friends, and because we used to spend New Year's Eve together as like young adult couples.

Very good friends, Dan.

We watch the Saint, we watch Dick Clark's rocking New Year's Eve together on our respective TVs, and like Saint and like it's the same routine every year, but I just love it and I look forward to it.

Where it's like, wow, Naughty by Nature is performing.

Remember those guys?

And like, you just roll your eyes and you're like, how

old do these fucking people look?

And it's so, it's so wholesome, but I really do love it.

So

I'm with you too.

I'm with you too.

I love that.

I love, I am, I love Connor Orrs

and the Jobs in cable television.

I'm with you.

I'm all on the dial on New Year's Eve.

That's what I'm all about.

All right.

Today's show, since it is New Year's Eve, we're going to do some New Year's Eve resolutions for NFL podcasters, okay?

Because God knows that we aren't perfect.

We try our best and we try to learn from our mistakes.

And I think that's part of of growth as a human.

And James Palmer, our buddy, is going to join us for that conversation.

But first, let us start by closing the door on week 17, Monday night football, a game with no meaning.

The Lions, it didn't matter if they won or lost on Monday night.

Week 18, Sunday night football against the Vikings will determine their fate as the one seed or a five seed.

And yet, against the 49ers team, also with nothing to play for, but played like they did, have a lot to play for, Dan Campbell said, it's not our style to rest.

It's not our style to punt on any game.

And hot damn, he's an easy man to respect.

Let's get into it.

Damn, damn damn.

Yes, the Detroit Lions,

they went for it.

They left their guys in, and they showed us a lot.

what we like about them, a lot what makes people nervous about them, and ultimately

what they've done all year, which is win 40 to 34 over a game 49ers team.

The Lions moved to 14-2

and an undefeated 8-0 away from Ford Field.

Mark Sessler, this was a fun game.

This is a game without a lot of defense.

And for Detroit, I thought it was the recipe for how they can win a Super Bowl, which is we know our defense isn't going to be great.

But if we could just make a couple plays, a couple turnovers even, that's all it takes to let our offense take control.

and that's how they won this one.

I loved that,

you know, beyond the fact that you put your starters in there, because really they're not a team that can rest 14 guys just because they're already starting on defense, so many guys that weren't starters to begin with.

But to go get tested by an amped-up Kyle Shanahan on the road, where it's like, I thought Shanahan and the Niners brought everything they could, and they played with a lot of like fire themselves and gave the Lions defense everything.

And I thought back to that giants team the second giants team that beat the patriots in the super bowl i think they were like ranked like 30th or 31st in defense and got there somehow and it's like i kind of it kind of makes i think the lions roster forget what we don't have here's what we do have and maybe our defense is compromised and maybe we need to go win shootouts but goff starting the way he did the offense starting the way they did it's like we can win any type of game anywhere and it's just this like fire coming out of the soul of Dan Campbell.

That's like, I'm going to tell the reporters this until they learn it.

I'm going to tell the players this until they learn it.

I'm going to tell the city of Detroit.

I'm going to tell the rest of the league.

We are not stopping.

We're going to do it our way.

And it brings faith.

I think this roster, and this matters, they feel like they can go anywhere and do anything.

And it has a lot to do with the nucleus coming out of the little middle, the middle part of Dan Campbell's body just exploding over society.

And I think it's one of the more interesting ways to coach a team.

and I'm all for it.

Let's hear from Dan Campbell.

Yeah, it was on my mind.

You know, I mean, I thought a lot about it.

You know, I thought about it leading up to the game.

I thought about it last night.

I told the staff, but

I ended up settling on the right thing to do was play these guys.

And

because we owed it to the team, you know, man, it's all good.

That's what we do.

You know what I mean?

This is what we do.

Like, we love it hard.

And

this is our deal right now.

So we're looking forward to this.

Everything about this week.

Dan Campbell not only played his starters, but, you know, whether it was him or Aaron Glenn, are greenlighting safety blitzes up 12 with like a minute 48 to play in this game.

And, you know, this is before Brock Purdy gets pulled out of the game and attempted 16 straight passes on what may or may not be a destroyed surgically repaired arm.

I love the ruthlessness of it.

And if that's, if that's like your whole like milieu, you know, you have to, you have to hammer that home.

And you can't just all of a sudden at the end of the season be like, ah, well, yeah, we're going to sit Jared Goff and Panay Sewell because, you know, we're not going to try that hard.

But my main takeaway here, guys, is that with Purdy, like this is such a catastrophic thing, even if he's okay generally, because now you're going into the negotiating window.

Now you're going into the period where Sam Darnold's available.

Now you're going into this massive sea of unknown.

And I think that I all along believed, and I could say with probably some degree of confidence, that the 49ers planned on paying him.

I don't necessarily, and I haven't, you know, made calls on it since everything happened last night, but I don't think I could say that anymore, you know?

Yeah, Brock Purdy, he left the game late in the fourth quarter after hurting his throwing elbow on a sack.

He said after the game, the elbow doesn't feel the best.

He also said it felt like it was on fire.

Now, here's where I'll talk about my baseball fandom when the worst thing ever that you want to hear with a pitcher is Tommy John surgery.

We know that Purdy's already had one before.

And a lot of times a guy will have an elbow issue, and they'll be like, the UCL appears intact.

But they do more testing.

And so I just want to say, we got to continue to cross our fingers for Purdy's sake that he's going to come through this and didn't suffer

ligament damage because you're right.

I mean, it would be, I mean, the worst because the game was decided at that point.

The Niners had been been knocked out of the playoffs a week earlier.

And beyond that, even like Brock Purdy played awesome in that game.

I know he threw the two interceptions, but especially in the first half, that is almost the best I've seen him play.

And then just a reminder, like, even though I think the Niners, I still feel they need to think long and hard as they spin forward out of this disappointing year, whether to make Purdy a top-five paid quarterback.

But this game was one of those reminders, I thought, Mark, about when Purdy is on, when Purdy Purdy is locked in, he is like a really fun guy to watch, and he could absolutely shred you.

And that's what he did to the Lions.

Now, that also reminds us that the Detroit defense is kind of a mess, and

it's putting it's going to put an immense amount of pressure on this offense in the postseason when, you know, obviously the stakes are sky high.

I'm nervous about the Lions.

I got to be real with you.

Like, I'm watching this game.

I'm nervous about them.

I feel like there is a recipe for playoff demise baked into too much being put on Jared Goff and mistakes that could happen as a result.

But in the here and now, they do find a way and they've been doing it all year.

What I kind of love about what happened last night is it's kind of the worst it's going to get.

Like you're going to give up a flood of points and yardage and get kind of filleted by a quarterback and your offense needs to pick up the slack.

And that's what happened last night because I don't think it would be that much worse against a Green Bay or a Minnesota necessarily.

So just that as an in a lab, it's like, cool, we went through it and we can do it again.

One little note on the Niners, because part of me, and I mentioned, I think

we had some text last night where I said, I wish they could college committee the playoffs and just replace like the Texans and put the Niners in the AFC and just see what happens there with the way they played last night.

All that aside, like you do see like these little building blocks for the future, because I think this has been the most depressing Shanahan season.

But like Isaac Garendo, Ricky Parasol, I mean, these are players that stepped up big time last night.

And so there's this, like, there are these elements of hope for this roster that I think feels aged, overpaid, and in a rough place.

Like, there are these elements of hope.

And so the idea of Brock Purdy, to Connor's point, I think

they're suddenly in a very weird place with what they do with him.

But the other question is, like, there is the Sam Darnold thing out there.

But other than that, like, who else is it?

Who do you go get?

Because other teams and fan bases thinking the same thing, like Seattle and like, oh, just dump our guy and start over.

Like, for who?

The name that comes to mind, and now he's a depressed asset right now, but Kirk Cousins, who there's been a connection between Shanahan and Cousins forever.

And I know people are kicking dirt on Cousins' grave now, and I understand he's had a bad year, but Cousins in that offense, another year removed from Achilles.

I would not rule that out as being a happy marriage.

And Shanahan has a crush on that.

I don't even know that.

Yes.

Yeah.

And by the way, MVP of this game,

to the point we're making about the Detroit defense, is Kirby Joseph because he had both of the interceptions.

And I don't think they win the game if they don't have someone that steps up and turns the ball over to get some stops.

It's the only way this Lions defense can get stops.

So I don't know.

That is what I came out of this game thinking, guys.

We're all rooting for the Lions.

We love the way they attack the game.

I love, like you were saying, like, not only are they aggressively scheming, Ben Johnson burned another trick play, another beautiful hook and ladder on a great

Jameson Williams touchdown.

They didn't care.

They said we went there to win the game.

And that's exactly the type of team you want to watch through an entire playoff run.

And the people of Detroit see their first Super Bowl.

But man, I'm nervous.

I just, I don't like the way this is set up.

And seeing Aaron Glenn, all those shots of Aaron Glenn

searching for answers that aren't there.

Maybe they get healthy.

Maybe they get guys back and they put some things together.

But the offense has to be perfect in the playoffs to win a Super Bowl.

And that's that's a high bar.

That's it.

Not to be like Debbie Downer on New Year's Eve, but like that was my big takeaway from the game.

I thought the Lions are.

I think you're right for the most part, but you also have to remember that like

there is such a luck element to every single Super Bowl run where it's like, you know, there's going to be some weird fumble, there's going to be some weird titball.

And it's like the team who, you know, tends to get those.

And I think if the Lions get those, then they're still like, as as a totality probably like a couple hairs above most of the other teams in the nfl

debo samuel one catch for five yards by the way on one target i think debo samuel is going to be ancient history on the 49ers next year and to your point mark piersall is a player they it looks like they hit on that draft pick man i did the fit but i did the thing too where i texted you and then like eight seconds later he had a massive play like that doesn't happen to mark too often but it happened last night so

All right.

Well, good job, Mark.

That was a good thing.

Well, I got to take it where I can get it.

Right.

He ate for 141 and a touch on 10 targets, and he made that beautiful one-handed catch.

Is that when you sent the text, Mark?

Well, it was eight seconds before that.

Goosebumps.

Goosebumps.

So, yeah, and Garendo, there are pieces there.

Let's just cross our fingers, hope, hope Purdy's okay, and then see what happens for the rest in this offseason, which is such a huge offseason for the Niners.

One thing, loved it.

My favorite moment maybe the entire season was Jake Jake Bates working on a sore hip, a ticker for the Lions.

I hope you're watching the show on YouTube.

This is the preferred method of distribution for Heed the Call.

And here he is.

Why is the tongue out?

Well,

that's one of multiple questions, so yes.

I did enjoy

Joe Buck having some fun with this one.

Troy Aikman, you know, I wish I would have heard what Troy Aikman's thoughts on this were when he was like five Troy Aikman America beers deep.

But he was pretty, he kind of kept it pretty close to the vest overall.

Just making love to that grass.

Yeah.

Speaking of making love, Justin, what are your New Year's Eve plans?

Mr.

Engagement.

Look at that.

This is going to be fun.

It's going to be a nice night in front of the fire.

isn't it?

Yeah.

So my parents are pretty big social people, and they're having a massive party at their house tonight.

And my mom mom and her best friend arranged a scavenger hunt around the city where we live in for like 50 people to compete with.

So they made a bunch of clues and take that.

I don't see you doing that in your New Jersey suburbs.

Is that even legal?

Damn, that's it.

Level up, bro.

Every team has a DD, no drinking in the cars.

And so we're going to be safe, but we're going to have a ton of fun.

And then after the hunt is over, we come back to the house and party all night.

Is your dad like the great Gatsby or something?

What's going on over there at Dallas?

Like, my dad's nickname throughout college and in his adult life since college is Party J.

Party.

He's in my phone as Party J.

So, yeah.

Is he watching right now as he normally is?

He will definitely watch this when it's out.

Yeah, no doubt about it.

We might have to get a Party J check-in in the near future.

What is his name?

He comments on YouTube regularly.

What's his comment name?

I think it's TX Big Dog.

Texas Big Dog.

Oh, hell yeah.

He comments on every episode.

He'd the something to do with the episode.

So, yeah.

He is young at heart.

I like that.

He's probably also maybe younger than me.

How old is he?

He just turned 65.

He's older than me.

He's Christmas.

Not close.

But young at heart.

All right.

And yes, just to close the door on all this, it might not matter

that game, but it was fun to watch.

And now it does set up.

Has there been a better regular season finale that we can remember?

And

I have the short-term memory of like a bird when it comes to NFL seasons, but like a week 18 Sunday night closer, is there anything that's going to touch Lions Vikings in the last, let's say, in the ATN HDC era since 2013?

This is going to be well this is true.

I think because of the nature of these two teams and like the story of the Vikings and the narrative of the Lions, I would say for me, yes, but I'm also with you that if you asked me to name three other week 18 finales, like I'd be with a gun to my head, he gone.

So.

Po show.

All right, let's take a break and when we get back, some New Year's resolutions with our buddy James Palmer.

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only.

Charlie Sheen is an icon of decadence.

I lit the fuse, and my life turns into everything it wasn't supposed to be.

He's going the distance.

He was the highest-paid TV star of all time.

When it started to change, it was quick.

He kept saying, No, no, no, I'm in the hospital now, but next week I'll be ready for the show.

Now, Charlie's sober.

He's gonna tell you the truth.

How do I present this with a class?

I think we're past that, Charlie.

We're past that, yeah.

Somebody call action.

Aka Charlie Sheen, only on Netflix, September 10th.

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Happy New Year from Ricky and Thor.

I'm a little under the weather, so I sound like shit, but still better than you guys.

Happy, happy new year to my boys.

I just had Connor Orr on Ricky's Ram Jam, my show.

So check that out.

Wouldn't be a Ricky Hollywood New Year without a Ricky Hollywood personal plug.

Of course.

Love you guys.

Heat the call.

We're going to heat the call all through 2025.

Love you.

Have a great happy new year.

Congrats, Justin.

Oh,

I love Ricky.

Happy New Year to Ricky Ricky Hollywood and again to all the hedonists with us today.

And happy New Year's Eve to James Palmer, our underdog compadre.

Hello, team.

What's up, buddy?

It's great to be here.

I got the invite.

I barely slept last night.

This was Christmas for me.

I don't know about anybody else.

We did.

I did forget to mention at the top of the show, we are going to go.

I live right by the beach.

We're going to go to the beach.

I'm going to take Captain the dog and we're going to watch the last sunset of 2024.

So that's kind of a new little wrinkle.

That'll be fun.

Hopefully the sun will be out.

Does your dog understand the concept of a sunset versus sunrise or even a day?

Do you think what to do?

He speaks to me.

It's like a son of Sam situation.

Okay.

And he said, you must watch the sunset with me.

Okay.

Or die.

Kill them all.

That's definitive.

That happened in a nutshell.

James, what do you got going on tonight?

First off,

I feel like with dogs, they really have no clue about time because they never really enter REM sleep.

They're just constantly like dozing off and waking back up.

So I feel like it's one continuous day for a dog.

We get dressed to the nines at the house.

I wear a full tux.

My son wears a full tux.

My wife wears a fur.

And we take a photo of our family in front of the Christmas tree.

And then we put it in like some sort of like black and white look.

So it's very like this family went down in the Titanic type of vibe is what we're seeing for.

And it's always just a really nice photo at the end.

I love that.

And we come up with backstories too, like, you know, where we were from, where the family was from, and how we met our demise.

Yeah.

Wow.

Smash cut to Texas Big Dog, Justin's dad taking notes on adding it to his New Year's routine in Dallas.

Wow, James.

All right, buddy.

Yeah.

How are you?

How's everything else?

Everything's great, guys.

Everything's great.

The travels have been good.

The year is winding down.

Here comes playoff football.

And all anybody wants to talk about is the teams that aren't playing football after Sunday.

That part annoys me.

As we're going to start off 2025 with grievances.

Why do we love at this point to stop talking about the playoff teams and keep talking about all the teams that are going to regroup?

I don't like that part of this year.

I think it's,

you know, if it bleeds, it leads.

And there's something to that.

But you're right.

I think that's a fair

comment, James.

And that's what we're not going to do.

Or maybe we will.

I don't know what we're about to talk about.

Because we're about to share some New Year's resolutions

for NFL podcasters or, you know, NFL insiders in the case of Palmer.

But Palmer is also a podcaster himself.

The 89 show with the great Steve Smith.

What's Steve going to do?

Is he going to get in the Hall of Fame?

What's going on with that?

He's a finalist again.

I think he deserves to be.

I think it's a matter of time for sure.

And all I keep thinking about is what Steve's party will be like.

And now that we host a show together, there's no way I don't go.

You've got to be invited.

If you were not, that would be controversial.

Yeah, it would really be.

That would make the headlines of us weekly.

Do you think his appearance on our show earlier this year might get us in the door?

100%.

100%.

100% feels shows.

That feels Steve.

He doesn't do a lot of shows.

Steve doesn't whore himself out often.

No.

All right.

So, you know, actually, along the lines of your comment, James, I think a good way to get into it is I'll go first here.

New Year's resolutions for NFL podcasters.

I resolve to no longer get sucked in by teams who win the offseason,

but ignore long-standing dysfunction in the greater operation.

These are the teams who inevitably make the fat kid cannonball splashes in free agency, who use their premium draft capital because they sucked the year before on the buzziest prospects, who look by the end of an endless offseason filled with

fan subreddits, self-stimulation, Orlofsky and knob jobs from Bristol, and an NFL films docuseries or six.

They look like greatly improved teams ready to return amongst the living.

However,

these are also the same teams that tend to operate on three-year cycles of team builders and coaching staffs, teams that are impetuous when they should be patient, lethargic when they should be aggressive.

And this is...

This last part is crucial.

Isn't it funny how the most inept teams, the teams that fail not for years, years, but for decades, are almost always run by ownership that missed the memo of their core role in the operation, sign the check, and move the fuck out of the way and let the actual football professionals do their jobs.

So, obviously, I'm talking about my New York Jets, who may or may not have been my Super Bowl pick this year.

I'm also talking about the Chicago Bears, who I believe I picked to make the playoffs.

I'm talking about the Cleveland Browns, who I didn't pick to make the playoffs, but they were right on the bubble for me, and I know some other people did.

The Indianapolis Colts, the Carolina Panthers to a lesser extent or more extent, these are the teams that I vow in 2025 to have my antenna up and ignore, not ignore, but be very wary of getting on board with these teams because when there is rot in the foundation, the house cannot stand.

In what world,

in what world

when the Jets hire fill-in-the-blank coach and JM, are you not crowing about them about a month and a half from now?

Like, like, I would, I, I, I admire your perseverance here with this resolution.

I do not believe you, it, like with most New Year's resolutions,

I do not believe for a second that you won't be riding the Jets horse along a field in the middle of, you know, mid February, telling us how everything good is about to happen.

Just because you're an optimistic Jets fan, too.

And that's a, you're noble, but I don't like your tone, ses dog.

I mean, why are you so angry about this?

Well, I'm not angry, but it's like, I mean, with the other teams, I get that you're not going to be like riding the Chicago Bears train.

That doesn't require much restraint.

But you,

to add the Jets to that, I'm just saying a little bit of warning.

When we make these, you know, a resolution for ourselves, it's like,

you know, I want you to fulfill it.

I believe in you.

I don't know.

Do you, though?

Because it really sounds like you believe in me right now, Mark.

With the other teams, I do, not with the Jesuits.

They basically cut me off to shout me down for being such a fool.

Specifically with the Jets, just with the Jets.

And that's because you're a...

That's still a point, Sess Dog.

Plug in, buddy, that the Jets are the most obvious example of this.

And if you are a fan of the team, that is even more reason why you got to have your guard up and be wary of it.

Now, if we're talking about the Jets, I was wary of the 2024 Jets, but I eventually gave in to

this version of them where they dodged through all the raindrops.

But especially after Woody Johnson being fully exposed as the fool that he is this year,

you have to protect yourself if you are a fan of these teams.

And if you're a prognosticator or an NFL analyst, because it wasn't just me, by the way, that was excited about the Jets going into the season.

A lot of people were.

And all those other teams.

How many hype/slash-hope pieces did we hear about the Chicago Bears going into the season?

Right, sure.

And in the case of the Bears,

the coaching staff was their undoing, and now ownership

is in the crosshairs of the fan base as well.

That's

my first tail sign when you couldn't get out of the huddle in training camp that things weren't going to go well.

Yeah, exactly.

So, yes, Mark, I'm sorry that I'm going to disappoint you in a couple of months, but the point of this is that I'm trying to learn from what is a never,

you know, an all-time forever truth about the NFL: that if the operation isn't sound, the roster will not turn into a winner.

So that's

it.

Do you, though?

You've upset me with this.

Well, that wasn't my goal.

On New Year's Eve, no less, Mark.

Yeah.

Well, I will silence myself, but I just, I think I threw out

just a concern that everyone watching on the show right now feels the same way as me.

So we'll see.

Good luck to you.

All right.

How about you, James?

Okay.

First off, yours seems very much like when somebody goes for the run, their first run of the year, New Year's Day, and they pull a hammy, and then the idea of running every day is just gone immediately after day one.

You see everybody with their little gloves and their little wrap-around hat over their ears.

Yeah.

But you know what?

I do want.

I do want my friends to give me a chance and believe that I can.

Yeah, exactly.

See, I that's all I ask for.

I mean, put in a villain role that I'm not.

I'm an eye in the window watching everybody run by, going, they're not going to be here tomorrow.

They're not going going to be here tomorrow.

They're not going to be here Saturday.

Yeah, he's that guy.

Okay, I'm going to go with this.

I travel a ton.

I spend as much time at all these training camps as I can.

So this is a little bit similar to Dan's, but a little bit different.

I need to make sure I am rather...

sifting through the bullshit of training camp because it's a very um it's a very loose-lipped uh environment it's an environment to talk to all your sources get a lot of information you can talk to a million people coming off the field James, check notes before reporting anything out there, because these are the things that I'd like to remember when training camp rolls around.

This is my New Year's vision.

Good teams are good teams.

Don't drink the Kool-Aid of,

well, are they going to have a down year?

No, the Chiefs will stay good.

It's fine.

They're pretty good.

Bills come at Buffalo.

Yes, the training camp will go as they usually go.

They won't wow you oftentimes in training camp.

They are just a steady ship that is leading into the regular season.

The second part is

there will always be the players that I love and I speak to them one-on-one and they will tell me things are going to be different this year.

They are trained to be optimistic but do not drink from their tiny little paper cup of delusion.

Make sure you avoid those conversations.

The third part is when you go to a camp, bad teams,

bad players beating other bad players is a very deceptive thing to watch.

So before, James, you go and report about what happened at that camp, visit a playoff team before you tell everybody that what I saw at Colts practice is this receiving core is outstanding.

Because guess what?

The DBs are trash.

So like bad players beating bad players is not a sign of a good team.

And so when you're there, and you guys know this, Connor, you know this specifically too.

Do not go talk to the new beat reporter that's been there on the beat for a year or two saying, listen, I think they got something here.

Go to the grizzled vet that is just steadfast with his negativity that is oftentimes right.

They've been in more camps than they can remember, but it looks like crap and they know it.

So that's my other part.

And then the last part is avoid the player that says,

this is the best shape I've ever been in in my life.

Tropalert.

I've dropped 30 pounds.

I'm now going to play here.

Or I gained 30 pounds.

They want me to play here.

That is a sign of we don't know what the hell to do with you as a player.

So we're trying to find a way to fit you into the roster.

Avoid that conversation as well as to keep an eye out for so, so, and so.

Troponette.

Yeah.

Keep an eye out for this guy.

He's dropped 30 pounds.

He's going to be an inside linebacker.

Troponat.

It's worse only than

the

guy who comes out in April or May and says, you have no idea how injured I was last year.

Like, I secretly was playing my shittiest football with a broken neck and you didn't know it.

You know, that's

a terrible one.

Yeah.

So I need to be patient during training camp.

All right, Connor, as a man who has also been to many a training camp and has covered the sport from all different angles, what is your New Year's resolution?

James's was excellent.

It was really good.

I would say on a very sub-level, to kind of put a bow on the two of yours together, I would say to stop, to kind of close off this idea, like the Texans are the perfect example where if it goes well one season, that the NFL is this steady ascent and to really challenge that, you know, every year.

You play well down the stretch, doesn't matter shit going into the next season.

But my main crusade, and I hope that everyone will join me in this, is I'm only allowing myself for every podcast that I do from here on out, from every article that I write, to only use one dumb, f ⁇ ing meaningless statistic from some stats service that doesn't f ⁇ ing mean anything.

Okay, so it's just like, and because here's here's the thing, and I think you guys all know this.

James, I know you know this.

You, we mystify the process, right?

And then we talk to these coaches after the season, and it's like, wow, did you come up with this thing where it's like, you know, on third downs, they do this tendency?

And it's just like, no, the right guard had diarrhea.

So we double-blitzed the right guard every single play and then smashed the quarterback's face in.

Like, let's talk about football the way that it is.

Let's ignore the goddamn noise.

Let's watch the games and let's come to a legitimate conclusion.

The Vikings choked the life out of the Packers by playing really good man defense.

Period.

I don't need to, you know, we don't, next gen stats doesn't need to be involved in this conversation.

You know, we saw it.

That's what it means.

And I think that everybody watching at home will appreciate it too.

We can get rid of this goddamn bullshit and we can enjoy football.

Did anybody else time that?

I think that was the third fastest rant, according to Next Gen Stats, by a podmaster on a New Year's Eve.

Like miles per hour.

Who gives a flying shit?

Like,

he's fast.

He's faster than the guy chasing him.

I think something that has changed so much in the last, what, 10 years,

maybe 15 years,

in terms of how people cover the sport is

it feels like if you don't have that information in your write-up, you're somehow being too surface level or you're not part of the revolution.

And so I think

it's almost like even if people felt this way, you feel compelled to include all this data because that's where the smart football is going.

But

what you're pointing out, I guess, is what?

That

that ultimately is just a bunch of eyewash and window dressing, where if you actually just make a clean observation,

you don't need that data data point.

I think maybe, is it fair to say that maybe there's an in-between ground where if it's a useful

data point.

He's giving himself one.

Connor Robertson.

Yeah, you're giving yourself one.

But in general, like a useful data point that backs up what you're saying, that's helpful.

But when it gets too granular, it goes from like reading a smart football piece to something that just feels like you're reading a math equation.

And that's not what, like, personally, I grew up like enjoying reading.

Like, if you watch, listen, or read an SI, a Super Bowl article from 1992 or whatever, like, and then you read one now, like, is it a better article now?

Because it has not, SI might be a bad example because that's your apparent publication, Connor.

It's a Blackboard.

But at the same time, 1954.

Yeah, exactly.

Like,

is it actually making the product better to have all this data in it?

Or is it better just to do it the way you're saying?

I think you make a good point.

What did Akeeb Tlaib say?

It's like it's for the people who would rather read sheet music than listen to the song right and it's like it's one of these things where you said that uh yeah i think it's on curran's uh i was about to say it sounds more like to lib quality not a keyb to leave but i think it's on tom curran's twitter bio i think that's where i saw it from but i think and this is for me too because i do find that it's a i i find a lot of times it's a crutch right and it's something that we can lean on when for example you know perfect thing like last night it's you know 1145 you're trying to put a bow in the power rankings, and it's like, okay, you look at, you know, what, whatever service you want to have, and it's like, okay, Drake May was one of eight against the Blitz.

Well, okay, but then let's go watch all those snaps.

Like, why, why did they blitz him in that situation?

Where are they blitzing him?

What's the purpose behind it?

Because Blitz means a hundred different things.

And let's clarify because, like, I feel like so often we're just like lost in this.

And the comedian Dan Soder does a great bit about he's best friends with childhood friends with Mike McDaniel, right?

And it's just like Mike McDaniel will tell him before the game, like, oh, their defensive tackle sucks.

So we're just going to run to him.

This is what, this is one of the smartest coaches in the NFL.

This is what you do.

This is what scouting and game planning is.

You hammer the shittiest player on the other team.

Like, let's kind of be more aware of how a lot of this stuff works.

Big guy versus small guy.

Fast guy versus slow guy.

Like, we can talk about it in this way.

And

I think it makes it accessible.

Riley Moss shit sandwich.

I think Connor deserves a round of applause on this.

Yeah.

Thank you.

Thank you.

And there's also, I wonder if another part of this, Connor, is

I think people that cover the sport but never played the game are targets at times as, you know,

you know, not worthy of giving true analysis.

So some people might be compelled, even from a self-consciousness angle just to start getting very analytically driven in your data because that is a way to, I guess,

cut the loss that

you're suffering according to others.

I think there's part of that too, like that whole culture, which bothers me as well.

Like, oh, if you didn't play the game, you're not worthy to have insight on the, which is just ridiculous, but it's something that's out there as well.

Yeah.

And please don't misinterpret, you know, I don't want anyone out there to think that I'm like doing that because I think, you know, for example, my mentor was Jenny Vrentis, who's now an enterprise reporter at the New York Times, like I think a biologist at Penn State, one of the smartest people that I've ever met.

And she would do these stories.

And by the time she was done with them, like I was convinced that she could call the offense like, and she knew it frontwards and backwards.

And so to say like, oh, if you never played, you know,

that is hogwash and it's complete baloney.

I think, you know, Mike McDonald, perfect example.

Like he is very upfront with the fact that like, you know, I'm a high school football player who is is an NFL head coach.

He just happens to be very smart, you know?

And I think there's a seat at the table for everybody.

But what we can't do, like, I almost feel like the analytics conversation is just as exclusionary as the you can't talk unless you play conversation.

And I feel like that what I'm really preaching here is like, let's find a middle ground here.

Like, let's find the sweet spot because I do think there is one for sure.

I like it.

Good luck.

I feel like we're like at a Syracuse

in their school of journalism, and Connor Orr Orr has come by to deliver a

sermon.

All right, beautiful.

Mark?

Nice.

Well, I think mine kind of fits

with each of these to some degree.

And it's pretty personal because, you know, like Dan, you and I, you know, I didn't mean to come hard at you with the Jets thing.

That wasn't the tone I was trying to set there.

But like we went through, we went through like a lot of

people before he walked the dog.

He wasn't going to be able to do that.

I know, I didn't know.

Now you made him second captain to see the sunset now.

New Year's is canceled.

I was only asking what a dog understood.

There's no REM sleep.

No REM sleep at all.

Poor dog has no REM sleep.

That's not fair for a dog.

I mean, I think that

we've gone through a lot, Dan and I, like since the last, over the last calendar year.

But one thing I was thinking about with just podcasting about football in general, I have two little parts.

Number one is that I used to, like at the NFL, do a lot of features where you'd get on the phone and talk to like Bill Laser for 25 minutes and write your story off of real information, like a lot of what Connor and James do.

And I was, my goal for this year was to

re-enter the world of talking to people who coach, who play, to get real information versus, to your point, like just data.

And I just really miss doing that.

And it's, I'm not trying, maybe I'm meant to be funny here or something.

Like it's more of a serious point where it's like, I think it adds to what the podcaster can do versus by the time it's November and you're just spinning off of like numbers and results like getting tactile information relationships and there's that but then the second thing

this idea that when I pick a team that then they go off and they go off a some sort of sled ride off of hell into hell because I've cursed them I'm not I'm never going to listen to anyone I don't care if you're some goon on the subreddit.

I don't care if you're someone else in my ear.

It's like, I'm never going to stop falling in love with certain teams during the season that capture my imagination because this is a 40 plus year journey of following football for me.

And thank you, Justin, for coming in with the little music and the sound bite.

But this is what I'm not going to get baked into.

When you fall in love, it's messy.

Right?

It's sometimes people aren't happy that it happened to you.

You're maybe it didn't happen when you thought it would happen.

When I fell in love with the Cardinals this this year like did it go right that they can handle that these are grown individuals men and women running the team players on the field these are people are paid well they are dealt with correctly um they are high up in our society like the idea the idea that i curse them is ridiculous this is on them what's your resolution

my resolution is that i will never veer away from like oh mark wore an eagles sweater and then we want that we want that but don't let's also there is a curse though I mean let's be real about that though

that's TBD but I absolutely will not will never veer off of my passions don't do it buddy okay we always want I gotta chime in real quick I have to bounce and do another podcast and my goal is to do three analytic mentions within the first five minutes do it and that's my goal

okay guys I love you Merry New Year

and I will all talk to you shortly individually and collectively.

You're the man, James.

We'll see you on the other side.

Mark, nobody would ever want you to change.

Well, some.

I don't think that the three of you remaining here do necessarily, but some do.

I can promise you.

Are you saying James did?

No, James just left, but like, I'm including.

I think some would want me to make some adjustments.

I'll use anything like Jason Zummalt wishes you would stop or

what are some other teams from the past.

Jonathan Gannon yeah yeah Jonathan Gannon would love for you not to bring up the Cardinals again and you know I didn't I didn't buy into

I believe there was a what was there a Vikings team a couple years ago that yes I mean brought to its knees the problem is that the list the list is long that's the problem

Mark cursed the Titans the year he jumped on the bandwagon after the Titans beat the Packers on Thursday night football and then they lost every game for the rest of the season they fired their general manager They fired their head coach, and now they're in position to possibly get the number one pick.

So that coast is still ongoing.

I think, Mark, it's almost like if we were to go back into the closet there at the New York City Irish pub on New Year's Eve in 2001,

yeah,

can you take the other P coat that's on the ground?

Yeah, should you?

That's debatable.

Like, should you continue to be doing something that is negatively impacting, like, as you point out, the players, the coaches, the fan base, like, is it worth it to share this love you have when it hurts people?

Well,

these are fair questions that you've raised.

I still have, you know, roughly eight hours to figure out my direction on this, but, you know, I continue to follow my own compass.

That's what I'll do.

You know, for hashtag content, I want you absolutely to continue.

Well, part of it's this is for podcasters.

Like, don't remove fire and brimstone and elements from a show.

That's also just bad podcasting, you know.

Teams be damned.

The fact that you curse teams, that we know for sure.

That is fact.

Will Mark continue to do it?

His resolution is yes.

And we will be doing it.

It is currently yes.

Who will it be in 2025?

The damned.

All right.

Justin, did you have one?

I don't know.

No.

Look at the look.

No, don't worry about it.

Justin's a busy man.

Justin just got engaged.

Justin's flying high.

He's got a big scavenger hunt tonight.

He's got a big scavenger hunt.

That he'll be.

Power rankings graphics during this taping so that I don't have to do it after we're done.

So I was a little distracted.

Are you on Jessica's scavenger hunt team?

Or are is she being sent out with?

Okay, I was going to say maybe send her out with another bunch of giant lumberjacks and see how that goes.

A little test early in the engagement.

Wait, what?

Well, just send her out with a different scavenger hunt team and just see what comes up.

So you said

who should she go with?

A bunch of lumberjacks?

Like Texas lumberjack types that are just like some burly men?

Yeah, they're like looking for like a golden squirrel inside of a shop.

I don't know.

Justin, how are you not hitting the hardball hardball drop right now?

Oh, right.

I told you I'm distracted.

You got sex addiction?

You got a problem with sex?

This is just a

test of love.

Sex addiction or something?

I would not send your

future wife off with a bunch of lumberjackers on New Year's Eve.

If you're looking for advice, unsolicited.

I wouldn't either.

But you trust her.

Not because I don't trust her, but because I would like to spend New Year's Eve with my fiancé.

I do trust her fully.

I know she'll wear the ring anyway, so everyone would see it and be like, damn, she's betrothed.

Too bad, because she is a bombshell.

You know what I mean?

I love it.

Fair.

Actually, you know how it works in society.

That's not how guys think, by the way.

Masculine lumberjacks, they're going to see the big rock on her finger, and she's like, oh, hands off.

So you got to go.

That's how it works.

Yeah, that's how it works.

Yeah.

You ever watched the

worked?

I don't know if we'd be be together, but that's how it works.

Also, Michael Scott once famously said, BFD, engaged, ain't married.

Right.

Right.

Right.

In college, one of my frat brothers told me, just because there's a goalie doesn't mean you can't score.

Well, that sounds like a criminal type.

Yeah, that sounds like a frat guy mentality.

That sounds like something that, yeah.

Which is why I've disassociated with that former life of mine.

Absolutely.

All right.

Good stuff.

And listen, like, Mark, just to close, you know, like, that I

will always want my team to be successful, but I also am in a place where I am no longer blind to the reality that they are a dumpster fire.

And I need to, and all Jets fans, as long as Woody Johnson is running that team, need to understand that.

absent major changes,

this is just going to, this cycle, this has not been, it's not a a coincidence that they've missed for 14 years the playoffs and that they have had five straight 10 lost seasons and haven't had a winning season in nine years.

Like

at a certain point, you need to protect yourself.

And that's where I'm at.

So

like eyes open, and I see you practicing that.

And you've been in the last couple of months

a bit of a different character with the Jets in terms of your approach to the disastrous ownership and everything else.

And I hate it.

They've made me more cynical as a fan than I've ever been,

but I can't help it.

And, you know, like just to connect it, because how can you not?

Like, same thing with the Browns.

Like, we can get excited about them getting the number one pick.

And, you know,

I'm also doing, I don't think I'm, have been waving my flag for the Browns.

You believe in them.

Like, we, we know what's going on in the text threads.

Like, you, you get excited about them in the primetime games.

You want them to do well.

But Jimmy Haslam remains a major problem there as well.

And that's how Deshaun Watson got on the team.

So

all teams or fan bases that are stuck with bad ownership need to just.

I think I'd ask all of us, but it's like, let's say they, in the next 40 days, hire Ben Johnson and trade up for the number two pick to get like Cam Ward.

Then suddenly, like, uh-oh, it's like, wait.

But that's okay.

That's okay.

but that's yeah but it doesn't mean that they're going to be fixed and i that is what i i'm saying like right when they hire ron rivera and you are your your optimism remains at a steady level i will be like i get that so or do they bring back rex ryan do you want to well do you want like a fun little note on that before we go yeah yeah for the shits of it uh what i was advised to do in in when they when i was asking about that like ron rivera rex Ryan was to say read the actual tea leaves of this and wonder if the Jets are doing their due diligence now on veteran defensive coordinators because the eventual head coach will be a young first-time offensive play caller hello so makes sense makes sense and I hope that's what they do

The second that I'm I have no hope for my team mark is when I'm out of here because then I don't love football anymore.

But don't take my like I I was more suggesting that of all my friends who are football fans, and I mean this, you have remained the most, like you are the most optimistic through the darkness.

You've remained optimistic.

So when you tell me that you're going to jump ship, not jump ship, but just the whole Jets thing is not going to affect you.

It's like that can you say what's best for the show.

That concerns me a little.

Well,

I'm a little bit disconnected from the operation in a way that I've never been before.

But let's see.

If they do hire Ben Johnson and get a GM like that, knows what he's doing, I still, you still have to worry about the dumb owner ruining it.

That's and that's what every Jet fan needs to worry about.

Anyway,

pivot.

I do believe in you, though.

Like, this idea that it extends to me not believing in you is not correct.

I don't, I, I appreciate that.

I believe in you.

Connor, we believe in you.

Yes.

As we

as we end our final show of 2024, we want to say goodbye

to Connor here and thank you, buddy, sincerely.

Give me some music, Justin.

Stop being distracted, Justin.

Thank you, buddy,

for everything you've done for us this year and everything you're going to do with us as we move forward.

We really appreciate in what was a

at times scary summer that you were immediately ride or die

and you've made the show so much better.

So thank you, buddy.

Thank you guys.

I mean this is

gosh, it's the best.

I was just telling Ricky Hollywood this.

It's like it brightens my week genuinely

and to connect with

all the fans from ATN and to be able to interact with them.

And, you know, I was saying this when Mark and I went to London and we met a lot of them.

Everyone deserves a chance to feel like that once in your life, where you walk into a room and you feel like you're a part of the goddamn Beatles, you know?

And, you know, for those people to make that possible, I think it's,

you know, there's like a really deep kind of emotional thing there, you know.

So just know that it's really appreciated.

And, you know, I love, I love being here.

I would just say, like, you could listen.

If you just listened just to today's episode, you would understand tangibly the difference that Connor makes in any conversation, whether it's a game recap or the nugget we just got about the Jets coaching search.

He's out there in the field.

He's a true reporter's reporter.

And I mean, I feel lucky to be working with the favorite people I worked with at...

our last job, my truly favorite people.

And Connor's right at the heart of it.

And you were right, Dan, that the minute we were trying to form this team, you know, a lot of like, we'll see what happens with certain agents and people and all this stuff.

Connor, right away was like, sure, let's do it.

Like, and no, no mess, just like, yes, I'm with you guys, we're here, and it's changed this season and will change future seasons.

So, we do love you.

Thank you, Connor, man.

Happy New Year's, you two, buddies.

Have a good one,

and that leaves the three of us.

Uh,

Mark, thank you, buddy, for uh, riding

together.

Uh, this has been a great year and many more to come.

And Justin, just like Connor, immediately was down.

We connected with each other and Underdog was

instrumental in obviously getting it done and bringing us all together.

So, Tim and the whole Underdog team, thank you to them as well

and giving us a chance to continue doing what we love, which is this show and connecting with

the hedonists out there.

Yeah, this has been very special, guys.

Yeah, and thank you to

all these people that came with us.

You know,

this is where I start to get weird.

So I love you.

Thank you.

And thanks to you guys for the call because there's no one else.

I heated that call as soon as you sent it out.

And there's no one else I'd rather be podcasting with.

Best job I ever had.

So thank you.

Love you.

We're doing a show with the people we want to do the show with, and we hope the audience understands that and feels that.

So, happy New Year's to everyone.

We'll be back, obviously, to finish out the regular season and then through the playoffs and beyond.

But until then, heeding us, have a great, safe New Year's Eve, and remember, in 2025 and beyond, heed the call.