Jamie Hess | Cultivating Resilience: Jamie Hess's Story of Addiction, Recovery, and Gratitude

Speaker 1 What is Jamie's because?

Speaker 2 You know, I've done a lot of cool things as an adult, but the fun mic drop moment is that I was an addict and alcoholic. And growing up, wow, I made life hard for myself.
I made it hard.

Speaker 2 I made it dark. And I didn't see any other way out.

Speaker 1 I feel that you were just so thankful of the moments. And I think that's something that people miss.

Speaker 2 Well, you know, it's really easy to have this big philosophical idea that we should be grateful, but what does that actually break down to?

Speaker 1 Like, that's hard. What are a a couple of things that people can do to limit those type of conversations that we all have on a regular basis?

Speaker 2 Well, there's a reason they call it a practice, right? You have to practice. It's not intuitive.
And in fact, I would challenge that it's the opposite.

Speaker 2 So, our brains are actually wired the way that our neurochemistry is wired. We are wired to look for the bad, the problems, something that might attack us, the saber-toothed tiger.

Speaker 2 It is what kept us alive as a species.

Speaker 3 Welcome to Mick Unplugged, where we ignite potential and fuel purpose. Get ready for raw insights, bold moves, and game-changing conversations.
Buckle up, here's Mick.

Speaker 1 Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to another exciting episode of Mick Unplugged. And today's guest has turned her personal challenges into a global mission of helping others.

Speaker 1 She is the founder, the creator of Gratitudeology, which we're going to spend a lot of time going into today.

Speaker 1 She is a dear friend, and I like to call her QVC's finest. Please join me in welcoming the amazing, the talented, the selfless, Miss Jamie Hess.
Jamie, how are you doing today, dear?

Speaker 2 I'm amazing. You are amazing.
I'm feeling amazing and I very much believe in the reticular activating system of our brain. So I've taken to saying, I'm amazing.

Speaker 2 I've taken to saying, you know, as I'm walking down the stairs in the morning and my mind wants to say, you know, oh, I'm so tired. It's so early.
I say, wow, why is everything so amazing?

Speaker 2 Why does everything work out for me? How is my life so incredible today? And the more you call it out like that, the more you believe it.

Speaker 1 See? See?

Speaker 1 And that's why I'm a huge fan of you and love everything that you do. And, you know, on Mick Unplug, Jamie, we talk about your because,

Speaker 1 right? That thing that's deeper than your why that really tells us, or not even tells us, but tells you, like that purpose, that mission that you have.

Speaker 1 So for the listeners and viewers, I'd love to share or hear Jamie's because. What is Jamie's Because?

Speaker 2 Well, this is always kind of my fun mic drop moment because usually people read a description of the podcast episode or they read my bio.

Speaker 2 And, you know, I've done a lot of cool things as an adult, but the fun mic drop moment is that I was an addict and alcoholic. And growing up, wow, I made life hard for myself.
I made it hard.

Speaker 2 I made it dark. And I didn't see any other way out.

Speaker 2 And the interesting thing about recovery is that, you know, they say that addiction is the only disease that once you get the treatment, you actually end up better on the other side.

Speaker 2 Like, if you have cancer and you go into remission from cancer, you just go back to not having cancer.

Speaker 2 But, you know, with addiction, when you do the work in recovery, you come out a different person on the other side.

Speaker 2 And everything that I learned about gratitude, about having a daily spiritual practice, about not being a victim and taking accountability for things and having integrity, that was all news to me.

Speaker 2 Like that was like a blueprint for living I didn't have.

Speaker 2 And so my why, my because, because I got sober and because I learned a new way of living, and as a byproduct, I got this understanding that an attitude of gratitude is the heartbeat of happiness.

Speaker 1 I love that so much. I love that so much.
And, you know, again, I'm a huge fan of you. And you talk about the greatness and the fulfillment of every day.

Speaker 1 And one of my mentors is Les Brown and he shares that same insight of you. And he's like, Mick, you know, I love days.
Every day is a great day. You know why? And I'm like, why? Try missing one.

Speaker 1 Try missing a day. Try not being here and see what that's like.
And I'm like, I get what you're saying, mentor. I totally get it.

Speaker 1 And when I listen to your podcast and I hear your story, and not to go there and talk about gratitudology like immediately, but that's what I feel from you. I feel that you are just so thankful.

Speaker 1 of the moments. And I think that's something that people miss.
Again, huge fan of you, the content that you're putting out, the platforms that you have.

Speaker 1 It's about enjoying and embracing those moments, not just even a full day, a full week. It's the moments of the day, the moments of the week.

Speaker 1 I'd love for you to go a little bit deeper and just how you take that appreciation because it's something the world needs.

Speaker 2 Well, you know, it's really easy to have this big philosophical idea that like we should be grateful, but what does that actually break down to?

Speaker 1 Like that's hard.

Speaker 2 And so how do we appreciate things? How do we remain in abject abject gratitude for our very breath? And that does come down to the moments. You are absolutely right.

Speaker 2 It's really how we talk to ourselves at the end of the day. I believe that it comes down to how we talk to ourselves because, you know, a lot of people compartmentalize.
We read self-help books.

Speaker 2 And then in that moment, when we read the self-help book, we're inspired to be grateful. Or we give advice to others.

Speaker 2 And in that moment, we're inspired to give somebody else advice to just, you know, really sit back and things could be worse. And there's starving children in another country and you're here.

Speaker 2 And hey, things are pretty good and be grateful for that. And it's like, that's not enormously helpful.
People used to tell me when I was younger and in my addiction, like, what are you doing?

Speaker 2 Like, you just be grateful. Like, you have a nice life.
My mother is TV journalist Joan London. I grew up with a nice life and they weren't wrong.
But let me tell you something, Mick.

Speaker 2 Guess how much that helped me, them telling me just knock it off and be grateful?

Speaker 1 Zero.

Speaker 2 That didn't help me. In fact, it made me feel more shame.
I'm like, oh my God, they're right. I have a good good and I'm privileged.
And here I am completely blowing everything. I really am a loser.

Speaker 2 And then I went and used more because, like, who wants to live in that? Easier to escape. Okay, so how do we actually sink into gratitude?

Speaker 2 Well, it's actually simpler than you'd think, but it's actually a little more annoying than you think. You see, what I always say is the work doesn't really feel like the work when you're in it.

Speaker 2 It just feels like a series of minor inconveniences, right? We all like to say, I'm doing the work. I'm doing the deep, I'm doing the work.
Are you?

Speaker 2 Because the work doesn't feel like anything profound. It feels like in that moment when you walk into the bathroom and look in the mirror and you call yourself fat, saying,

Speaker 2 we don't talk to ourselves like that. That is a beautiful woman or a beautiful man I see in front of me.
I am fabulous. I'm in my power.
I'm in my presence. I am a child of God.
That's the work.

Speaker 2 That's literally the work. It is stopping yourself in those micro moments and saying, come on.
get backgrounded, pull that leash back. We're going to get back in gratitude.

Speaker 1 So for the listener or viewer that's watching or hearing this, and they're at that moment where it's the bad self-talk, or as I like to call it, the false self, right? Like it's not your true self.

Speaker 1 What are a couple of things that people can do to limit those type of conversations that we all have on a regular basis?

Speaker 2 Well, there's a reason they call it a practice, right? You have to practice. It's not intuitive.
And in fact, I would challenge that it's the opposite.

Speaker 2 So our brains are actually wired the way that our neurochemistry is wired. We are wired to look for the bad, the problems, something that might attack us, the saber-toothed tiger.

Speaker 2 It is what kept us alive as a species. However, what happened or what didn't happen is our brain didn't evolve out of that.
In other words, you're not looking to escape a saber-toothed tiger all day.

Speaker 2 It's not coming.

Speaker 2 You're good.

Speaker 2 But what we do instead is we react that same way to, you know, the judgmental email from a client or the unhappy email from our boss or the side eye from a coworker or, you know, a weird, you know, kind of glance from our partner or loved one.

Speaker 2 And all of a sudden we feel attacked, we feel under siege and we get fight or flight. So it's really about having a practice.

Speaker 2 So you have a little bit of armor so that intuitively, because here's the thing, I don't always do the gratitude or the positive self-talk or the taking a moment thing perfectly, but I do it a lot more intuitively now.

Speaker 2 I do it a lot better now than I used to. And that came from a practice.

Speaker 2 The practice is for me, a couple of those simple things i really hate when people who talk about gratitude come on and just say here's what you do you do a gratitude list of three things in the morning like we get it pam we get it you know like okay but gratitude list great place to start i will say this my good friend chris shembra who's another gratitude expert he said you know everybody in marketing like has to have something they're for or against like in the marketing of their own brand you know like i'm for this and i'm against this he goes you want to know what i'm against i said what chris he goes gratitude journals i said okay friend give it to me tell me Why are you against gratitude journals?

Speaker 2 He said, because I feel that everyone's been sold a lie, that this cottage industry of gratitude journals is going to, is the thing, is the gratitude, is the.

Speaker 2 And why he's saying that is that gratitude is also a pro-social exercise. So by sitting in your head, in your bed, and writing down three things,

Speaker 2 it is a good start. It's not a bad place to start.
But by thinking that's the beginning and the end of a gratitude practice, I think is short-sighted. So gratitude is a pro-social approach.

Speaker 2 The more that we can profess it, the more that we can say things, you know, especially as leaders, we forget it's very easy to tell people what they're doing wrong, right?

Speaker 2 But it's, it's harder to remember to tell people, hey, you know, I had a boss.

Speaker 2 My last time I was employed, by the way, I mean, I'm employed, but the last time I was employed by a company, and now I'm an entrepreneur, the last time I had a boss, now I have clients.

Speaker 2 It's a whole different set of problems, but I had a boss, right? And two bosses, female founded company. They were, it was the best place I ever worked.

Speaker 2 I worked there for the last seven years of my, my corporate career as an SVP of a big agency.

Speaker 2 They never failed to, you know, if you're doing a great job, I would just get an email saying, hey, Jamie, we just want to let you know you have really been crushing it lately and it has not gone unnoticed.

Speaker 2 Here's a, you know, $250 gift card to go get a massage. Enjoy.
And I was floored. And my mom used to say, they are so smart.
You know, the stupid $250, it costs them nothing.

Speaker 2 You're never going to leave that company. I said, you're right.
Because I feel appreciated. And that goes so far, but it also boomerangs back to the appreciator, right?

Speaker 2 Because this is like a goodwill boomerang that we're doing here. So there's there's a lot of different ways that we show and express and receive and profess gratitude throughout a day.

Speaker 2 I do like a gratitude list. I think it's a good pen to paper exercise.
But I'll tell you it, Mick, sometimes when I'm just having a hard moment, I will go, this is, I call it either bathroom prayer.

Speaker 2 I'll go in the bathroom and do say the serenity prayer, or I'll just like pop on YouTube on my phone and type in like gratitude meditation five minutes and do the first one that comes up.

Speaker 2 It's just about getting in the habit of taking a contrary action.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Hi, Morgan Freeman here.

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Speaker 4 Now, I don't have the condition myself, but if you're living with ATTR-CM, it's important to know about treatment options like Atruvi, also known as Acoramidis, because you have the power of choice when it comes to treatment.

Speaker 4 Atruvi is an old medicine used to treat adults with ATTR-CM to reduce death and hospitalization due to heart issues.

Speaker 4 Tell your doctor if you're pregnant, plan to become pregnant, or are breastfeeding, and about the medications you take. The most common side effects were mild and included diarrhea and abdominal pain.

Speaker 4 If you have ATTR-CM, talk to your cardiologist about Natruvia or visit atrubia.com. That's ATT-R-U-B-Y.com to learn more.
It's time to get busy living.

Speaker 1 I love what you said there about being told what you do wrong. So, you know, I talked to a neuropsychologist, not for me personally, but just to talk about life, right?

Speaker 1 Maybe for me personally, but whatever. We won't go there, Jamie.
And he said, you know, Mick, here's what our society has taught us for 5 million years, right?

Speaker 1 When you're born, you taught your name and the word no.

Speaker 1 Right? You know everything you're not supposed to do. And like, it's ingrained in us.
No, no, no. When you're hired onto a job, you're taught the rules and the things not to do.

Speaker 1 You're never taught fulfillment. You're never taught appreciation.
And even like the best, most competitive athletes in the world are the best self-driven people.

Speaker 1 Like I like to think I'm a very high-strung, self-driven person, right? Like you still appreciate small wins. And that's what we don't do enough of.

Speaker 1 And so when I talk to leaders, I talk about those things, right? Like, how do you show appreciation more than you feel like you should? Because people need that. As humans, we need that.

Speaker 1 And how do you celebrate small wins?

Speaker 1 Because people want to know they're doing the right things that are helping companies grow, that are helping to add the contribution to the direction that we're going, not just when we do something wrong or what to look out for.

Speaker 1 And so, again, Those are things that I see in you and hearing the messages that you're delivering on your platforms as well.

Speaker 1 So I wanted to just say thank you for bringing that up today because that's something that I feel the world needs more of.

Speaker 2 Well, thank you. And I think it's a great point.
It's a great point. And I think it's hard for people sometimes to stay in gratitude in general when they're going through a rough time.

Speaker 2 That's obviously when we need it most, but that's when most people start to slip and be like, you know what? Everything isn't great, you know, and you just want to lean into like, woe is me.

Speaker 2 And that's honestly why I started my podcast, Mick, is because my podcast, so I had another podcast for four years prior to this one, and it was great.

Speaker 2 It was a, you know, I co-hosted it with a couple other well-known women in wellness, and it was called Off the Gram. And it was everything at the intersection of wellness and social media.

Speaker 2 It was a chat show and it was fun, but I really wanted to do deep immersive audio theater storytelling, you know, audio narrative with sound design and narration and telling these great stories. And

Speaker 2 I love true crime, but I don't, ever since I became a mom, I became a wimp.

Speaker 2 Like I used to love 48 hours and dateline, but like I, and I love true crime podcasts, but like I don't want it to end with like, and her body was found in a ditch.

Speaker 2 It's like, now that I'm a mom, I'm too protective to like deal with that. I'm like, ah, like, especially when it's about kids.

Speaker 2 So, I was like, how could I take people through a story like that where there's like a cliffhanger and you're like, what's going to happen next? And then leave them with a really motivational outcome.

Speaker 2 That would be nice, right?

Speaker 2 So, my why, my because, the answer to the question you asked me earlier was my addiction. I went through addiction.
I went to a really dark place. And then, as a byproduct, I got better.

Speaker 2 I gained gratitude and it's fueled my success going forward. And as I went to more entrepreneurial conferences and summits, I realized every eight, nine-figure entrepreneur has the same story.

Speaker 2 Any celebrity thought leader, we all had have our why story. Something happened.
It taught us a great lesson, usually along the way. And then we came out on the other side of a different person.

Speaker 2 So each episode, each week, I tell the story of one person. I go and interview them.
And I do almost all my interviews in person.

Speaker 2 So I am flying around the country with the crew, sitting with these people because I just want to be heart to heart, eyeball to eyeball, and hear it.

Speaker 2 And I mean, I've had people like Rain Wilson and Niamh Shulman from Catfish and Gabby Bernstein. I mean, such cool people.
And we get into their story.

Speaker 2 And I tell it in a way where you feel like you're listening to an audio book.

Speaker 2 But the goal is to show people that if they are going through that hard point in their life right now, not only is it not the end, like

Speaker 2 we always have to see the darkness before the brightest light. What might be on the other side of that, if you play your cards right, right?

Speaker 2 If you lean into it, lean into the suck because there's something to be learned there.

Speaker 2 What's on the other side of that is amazing. And so I really believe that's a big part of gratitude is like almost the disruptive part.

Speaker 1 It's really easy to be grateful when everything's good, but learning to be grateful for the parts that suck because you know that they're there to teach you a big lesson i think that's like gratitude you know the rest is gratitude 101 this is like ap gratitude there you go giving us high school lessons right there i like it jamie taking us to school so let's talk more about jamie right so you're past your addiction right like it's a thing that people go through and you're you're constantly going to be you know fighting battling and whatever which i love about you and then it's like these are the words of mick and and Mick only.

Speaker 1 You decided to wake up, toughen up, and now you're starting career, right? What was those initial moments like? So let's go more of the story with Jamie. So it's like, okay, this is the new me.

Speaker 1 This is who I am. I'm embracing who I am and I'm going to move forward.
What was moving forward like for Jamie?

Speaker 2 Well, I was a publicist for my whole 20s and I was born to be a PR girl. Like I was just born to do it.

Speaker 2 I loved that job, but I was always fighting against myself because PR, as you can maybe imagine, I don't know if you know a lot about the world of public relations, but especially in New York City, it's like champagne and cocaine and bottles and bottles.

Speaker 2 And that's just what it is, you know? And it was a very easy job for me to lose myself in. I was doing a lot of nightclub and hospitality hotels, you know, PR for those types of places.

Speaker 2 I was out all the time. You felt like you had to be out, like doing drugs in the bathroom with the writers from page six, because that's like how you got.
further in your career.

Speaker 2 And it's like, it was hard. It was very hard to get sober in that environment.

Speaker 2 For a couple of years, I was actually the the publicist for Crowbar, which is the biggest nightclub in New York, Chicago, Miami. So, like, literally in the belly of the beast.

Speaker 2 So, there was a lot of, and I think this happens to a lot of addicts. You get your whole identity wrapped up in that.
Like, without the drugs, am I even me anymore? Like, cause am I even a publicist?

Speaker 2 Am I even cool? Am I even part of New York nightlife? When I came out on the other side, I really had to give myself a little time to get my sea legs.

Speaker 2 And to be honest, like, I had to take a little time away. I went back to my sport.
Fun side note: I'm a horseback rider. So

Speaker 2 I had to burn it to the ground and build it back up. I took three years to go teach riding to young women and go back to the working outdoors and getting dirty and working with animals.

Speaker 2 And then after three years, I woke up and I was like, huh,

Speaker 2 okay, I'm ready to go home. I was in LA at the time.
I'm ready to go back. And I came back to New York and I hit the ground running.

Speaker 2 What happened on the other side of that is the part I always tell when I'm up keynote speaking, which is this incredible, I started falling up.

Speaker 2 And it was not even, I didn't get any new accreditations. I didn't learn any new skills, but as a byproduct of showing up as a new, different, whole version of myself, because I did the work.

Speaker 2 And the work, again, the work wasn't something I could do in like a six-week workshop.

Speaker 2 What you're hearing me say is I went to rehab and took three years to rebuild myself from the ground up, dismantling my identity from New York City nightlife, rebuilding my ego and my place in the world.

Speaker 2 And then I came back, by the way, to my high power career. I didn't have to give it up.
I had to build myself back into a place where I came there, not a shell of a person, but a whole person.

Speaker 1 A full Jamie.

Speaker 2 And so I start following up. So I start getting promoted.

Speaker 2 By the way, three year employment gap, had to explain that. Like came back like after like teaching little girls how to ride ponies for three years.

Speaker 2 And I was like, I'd like to be a high-powered publicist. And they're like, what about the last three years, babe? A side note for anybody wondering, I got all my high-power friends.

Speaker 2 editors, writers, celebrity friends of mine to write a little blurb about what it had been like to work with me in my early days of PR to show a testament.

Speaker 2 You know, hey, she's been out of it for a couple of years, but this is someone who, so where there's a will, there's a way is what I'm saying. Got myself a job and started following up.

Speaker 2 And I believe it's because I came to work every day with a humble spirit of gratitude. Everyone else in the office was doing what people in offices do.

Speaker 2 The West Coast office was fighting with the East Coast office and all the PR girls were being caddy and they were fighting with each other. And I was just happy to be there.
There you go.

Speaker 2 And the reason I was just happy to be there was because I know that it didn't have to go down like that,

Speaker 2 that I potentially should have been dead.

Speaker 2 And by showing up as this different person, people just, it was magnetic. It was magnetic.

Speaker 2 And within three years, I got promoted from account executive to senior account executive to managing director to VP to SVP. I met my now husband, who I'll borrow this from Dr.
Phil.

Speaker 2 I believe that relationships aren't 50-50. They're 100, 100.
And both of us had done the work to become full people.

Speaker 2 In fact, when I was set up with him, my girlfriend who set us up said, Jamie, why don't you have a boyfriend? I said, because I'm happy. She was like,

Speaker 2 she was like, well, I want to set you up with my friend George. I said, fine, I'll meet your friend George.
And then fast forward, you know, here we are 13 years later with two kids.

Speaker 2 But all of that happened because I showed up as a different version of me, not from a place of lack, but from a place of abundance.

Speaker 1 Love it. Love it, love it, love it.
Amazing, Jamie. S.

Speaker 1 So, you know, you've been all over TV, right? Good morning, America, The View.

Speaker 1 You're the queen of QVC, as I like to say that you are. Like, how do you handle in a good way the busyness that you have, right? Because you fly to go interview your guests for your podcast.

Speaker 1 You're still a mother. You're still a wife.
Like, how does Jamie handle the busyness?

Speaker 4 Hi, Morgan Freeman here. I want to talk to you about a serious rare heart condition called ATTR cardiac amyloidosis or ATTR CM.

Speaker 4 Now, I don't have the condition myself, but if you're living with ATTR-CM, it's important to know about treatment options like Atruvi, also known as Acoramidis, because you have the power of choice when it comes to treatment.

Speaker 4 Atruvia is an old medicine used to treat adults with ATTR-CM to reduce death and hospitalization due to heart issues.

Speaker 4 Tell your doctor if you're pregnant, plan to become pregnant, or are breastfeeding and about the medications you take. The most common side effects were mild and included diarrhea and abdominal pain.

Speaker 4 If you have ATTR-CM, talk to your cardiologist about ATRUBY or visit Atruby.com. That's A-T-T-R-U-B-Y.com to learn more.
It's time to get busy living.

Speaker 2 I would love to say that I'm an expert in balance, but I don't sleep very much. And it's, and what I'm going to be honest about is that's a terrible, terrible thing to sacrifice.

Speaker 2 So what I'm working on as we go into 2025 is setting better boundaries. I would very much recommend for any solopreneurs out there having a business coach of some ilk.

Speaker 2 I am a business coach for other people, but I also have a business coach.

Speaker 2 And the reason is because when I started as an entrepreneur, I was like, wow, now I don't have to also, I was always side hustling while I was in the corporate job.

Speaker 2 And I was like, now that I don't have this corporate ball and chain, I'm going to get everything off the ground in the first 90 days.

Speaker 2 I'm going to write seven books and speak on 90 stages and be on TV. And guess how many things I got done, Mick?

Speaker 1 Probably not. Zero.
Zero.

Speaker 2 Because I was trying to do everything at once. So it was like that old meme: I have 15 tabs in my brain open, one's playing music, and I don't know which one is which.

Speaker 2 Nothing was actually going across the finish line. I think that prioritizing and setting boundaries is really important.

Speaker 2 So for me, also at the end of the year, having kind of like a bit of a come to Jesus, looking at my PL, which projects did I put the most time into, and were those the most profitable?

Speaker 2 And if not, we got to fix that. You know what I mean? So I would say for me, honestly, I do believe energy begets energy.
I just keep going.

Speaker 2 I'm very ambitious, but I also do a lot of things that I just love. So truly, none of them feel like work, but I should also manage myself as a wellness expert.

Speaker 2 And I started this whole game as a wellness influencer. I should manage my self-care a little better and make sure I sleep as well.

Speaker 1 See, I need that too, because people laugh because the question that I ask you, I get asked literally the same thing. And it's like, I sleep four hours a night.
And they're like, what?

Speaker 1 And I'm like, no, I promise, but I'm refreshed every day. I wake up like this, right? Like, I'm good.
I just don't, for whatever reason, require a lot of sleep.

Speaker 1 But people like Jamie, those wellness experts, those wellness gurus are like, Mick, you need eight hours of sleep.

Speaker 1 And I'm like, there's no way in the world I can find an additional four hours to sleep. So I'm with you.
2025. I'm going to go to five hours.
I'm going to do five hours of sleep in 25.

Speaker 2 The science says that you're not going to live as long. So my, my concern for you and for me, by the way, is that I also feel okay after not sleeping as long.
However, it's like literal brain damage.

Speaker 2 So it is important to try to get eight hours of sleep as an adult, and I'm not. accomplishing it.
One thing I would suggest maybe getting a tracker, like an aura or an ultra-human ring.

Speaker 2 Another product I was introduced to recently, and this is not an ad, it's called Beacon 40.

Speaker 2 It's like a light that you put in front of your face face and you stare into this light and it helps with the part of your brain that essentially is kind of cleansed when you sleep and it kind of helps repair some of that.

Speaker 2 So not that I think we should just be biohacking it and not sleeping, but I do believe that you should at least pay attention to your sleep, pay attention to your brain, because it concerns me when I don't sleep because I do know the science.

Speaker 2 Even if I feel somewhat okay,

Speaker 2 part of self-care and your body replenishing, especially if you're exercising and working out, is sleep.

Speaker 1 Okay, Jamie, fine. Beacon 40, though, you know, I like a hack.
So, you know, I'll do four hours of that and four hours of sleeping. There you go.
There we go. There we go.
So, no, I love that.

Speaker 1 And I want to give a couple of other tips from Jamie to the viewers and listeners.

Speaker 1 So, what else when we talk about wellness and tying it to gratitude, what are some things that people can be doing on a regular basis?

Speaker 1 I hate saying daily because to me, like daily becomes almost impossible.

Speaker 2 But if I say regular, then I can build it up to daily so what are some things that people can be doing on a regular basis acts of service okay when i went into recovery and my sponsor i would just complain you know i'm stuck in my head and i'm having cravings and i'm having anxiety she was like i totally understand that can be hard you should reach out your hand and help another alcoholic I was like, I don't think you heard me, ma'am.

Speaker 2 I, I said, me, I'm having a problem. I'm having these problems.
She's like, yes. So you should go help someone else.
I was like, I, no comprendo. What are you talking about?

Speaker 2 It was news to me. It was news to me that the only two way, the only way to get out from between my two ears was to go help somebody else, to go be of service.

Speaker 2 We build self-esteem by doing esteemable acts. It's why the first thing they teach you in rehab is to like make your bed every day, right?

Speaker 2 Like by having structure, discipline, and doing things that make us feel complete and pride, we build self-esteem.

Speaker 2 So if you're waking up every morning and you're just feeling like, I can't get to a place of gratitude, I'm just having a hard time getting getting my two feet on the ground and feeling good, go be of service.

Speaker 2 Go help somebody else. Because I'm telling you, it's the life hack that people don't realize.
And the problem is it's not because people aren't good people.

Speaker 2 We want to help each other, but we're just so busy. But when you're so busy and overwhelmed is exactly when you need to go be of service.

Speaker 1 That's amazing. That's a masterclass lesson in and of itself.
Like I'm taking that mental note because I feel like you were talking to me just now, Jamie.

Speaker 2 And you don't have to go work in a soup kitchen. You could just call a friend you haven't talked to in a while and say, how you doing?

Speaker 1 Yeah. That's it.
Yeah. I love that.
I love that. Me and my buddies, we have a thing that we call a checkup from the neck up, right?

Speaker 1 Like just randomly out of the blue, we're going to call each other just to, how's life?

Speaker 1 And we have a rule also, and I'll tell you this, if you're the receiver of these calls, we have a rule where you have to be honest.

Speaker 1 If you're not having a good day, like tell that person you're not having a good day, right? Like those are our rules. Like we don't fake it till we make it.
Like, we're very honest and transparent.

Speaker 1 And so I'd like to add that on too, Jamie. Just when you're the receiver of that call, be honest, because honesty is the key to self-improvement as well.

Speaker 2 Totally. We have so much ego and it's hard to just say, you know what? I'm having, I'm struggling.
I'm having a hard time. And,

Speaker 2 you know, a lot of people wait until it's too late, right? To raise their hand.

Speaker 2 But the reality is when you get the thing that's troubling you out of your head, saying something out loud takes so much of the power away from it. Like, so much.

Speaker 2 And anytime I've had, you know, a struggle, whether it was addiction, whether I had an eating disorder that cropped back up, even in my active recovery, I'd been sober for many years, but I had an eating disorder that cropped back up.

Speaker 2 You know, after I had had kids and I had to stand in that doorway of my living room looking at my husband on the couch, being like, Am I going to go have this conversation right now? And I did it.

Speaker 2 And the second you do it, the second you tell somebody else, Hey, I'm not okay,

Speaker 2 You think everything's going to get worse, but everything gets better. Everything gets better as soon as you brought somebody else in.

Speaker 2 So this is why I believe the power of hyperlocal accountability of just reaching out and saying, I need to fix this, or I need some help, or I need to, you know, can you help me?

Speaker 2 Magic.

Speaker 1 Yep. Yep.
Love it. Jamie, you've blessed us with so much.
This was truly a masterclass, like truly a masterclass. But before I get you out of here, I need to go rapid fire with Jamie Hesh.
You ready?

Speaker 1 All right. The best meal that Jamie cooks herself.

Speaker 2 Oh, that's a trick question because I don't cook, but you know, butter and jelly. Love it.
It's a trick question.

Speaker 1 So Jamie doesn't cook.

Speaker 2 My husband is the chef in our family. He did not marry me for my domestic goddess skills, but let me tell you, I have other things that I do well.
We have our lanes.

Speaker 1 Okay. So what's one thing that Jamie is amazing at that most people don't know?

Speaker 2 Scheduling our family and just keeping, I run my house like I run my business, like an absolute maniac. But I think that that's the key to having kids.
I truly like lack of chaos.

Speaker 2 We are, you asked me what we're doing next June. I got you.

Speaker 1 We're booked.

Speaker 2 We're good.

Speaker 2 But it de-stresses the whole family because they know mom's got, I know dad's got dinner, but mom's got, you know, the plane tickets for, you know, for, for spring.

Speaker 2 In a relationship, you have to have your lanes. And by the way, they may not look like the gender lanes from the 50s, and that's okay.

Speaker 1 That's better, actually. That's better in today's world, for sure.
All right. So we just learned Jamie doesn't cook.
Jamie's a prototypical a strong planner organizer, right?

Speaker 1 What's a weakness for Jamie?

Speaker 2 I mean, I really disclosed it earlier, but it's like, it's just yelling at me loud in my head. It's the only answer I can give, which is setting professional boundaries.

Speaker 2 I think that when you are a mom, you're always going to live in a bit of mom guilt. But I'm very careful to tell my kids, just because I work this hard doesn't mean you're any less important.

Speaker 2 It just means that work's important and so are you. And we all learn balance.

Speaker 1 I love that. I love that.
So, Jamie, where can people follow and find you?

Speaker 2 And they can head over to coachjamiehess.com. That's where my coaching program is, gratitudeology.com, or you can find the Gratitudeology podcast anywhere podcasts can be listened to.

Speaker 2 In fact, you can also text the word gratitude to 33777 and you'll get the links to listen. And you can also find me on Instagram at Jamie Hess.

Speaker 1 Love it. I will have the links to all of that in the show notes and descriptions.
For all the viewers and listeners, I promise you, Jamie's phenomenal.

Speaker 1 You probably already know Jamie's phenomenal, but like her Instagram's amazing. She goes a little, not all the time behind the scenes, but you get to see a lot of bubbly personality.

Speaker 1 You get to hear the truth. I freaking love you, Jamie.
I just want you to know that.

Speaker 2 Ditto, my friend.

Speaker 1 There you go. And for all the viewers and listeners, remember, you're because is your superpower.
Go and leash it.

Speaker 3 Thank you for tuning in to Mick Unplug. Keep pushing your limits, embracing your purpose, and chasing greatness.
Until next time, stay unstoppable.