2025.11.13: That Shallow End Crouch

Speaker 1 Yum.

Speaker 1 Hey! We're recording the podcast.

Speaker 2 Gut up.

Speaker 2 Good morning to you, wherever you are, because

Speaker 2 it is Morning Subway for November 13th, 2025. My name is Bernie Burns, sitting right over there.
Yum. It's Ashley Burns.
Hi, Ashley, everybody.

Speaker 1 Oh, thanks. That's so nice.
You said the nicest things to me.

Speaker 2 First things first,

Speaker 2 we're going to do a drop contest today for that one. So first person at my total discretion who posts in the comments for this episode.

Speaker 1 On RoosterTeeth.com.

Speaker 2 On RoosterTeeth.com for the drop, which is...

Speaker 1 Yum.

Speaker 2 Who said that? Where it's from?

Speaker 2 I'll send you a code for a free t-shirt.

Speaker 2 First person.

Speaker 1 And what great timing since we have a new t-shirt in the store.

Speaker 2 We might have another one. So I have to do a little bit of a correction yesterday.
So I was like, sometimes over the course of many years,

Speaker 2 things tend to blend together memory-wise. They end up like end up in the same storage banks.

Speaker 2 And the Rooster Teeth Undead poster, which was a very limited run of 300 posters, Tony Simonetta showed up in the comments and was sharing a lot of like old merch stuff, like the whole collection that he had of People Like Grapes.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah. He actually, he messaged me and sent me, because I did a lot of the store photos for the women's cup, people like grapes.
So he sent them all to me. And I was like, this is awesome.

Speaker 1 Cause there's one of them that I use as a profile photo all the time because I think it's hilarious. But I have like, over the years, I've never had the original version.

Speaker 1 So I just like, it got smaller and more, you know, like every time you like resize it or something, like it, it pixelates a little bit more and it gets more like artifacts in it.

Speaker 1 So it was like, it was really degraded by this point. So I'm really happy I have like a new version to start degrading.

Speaker 2 Well, it made me smile too. First of all, that he did that.
But then in also classic Rushiki fashion, the first comment on it was, You missed this one.

Speaker 2 And it was somebody who had bought the People Like grape socks or something like that. Wow.
And it was just like, Yeah, it's always like, there's always

Speaker 1 there was a lot of people like or people don't like or, you know, dogs kids don't like, or there were a lot of variations on that particular thing.

Speaker 2 But the first one came from the classic conversation we were talking about where I used to feed Gavin the grapes out of my lunch.

Speaker 1 I love it. It's like he's your toddler.

Speaker 2 Just set him in a hand of like frozen or refrigerated grapes. But yeah, so then

Speaker 2 I learned, I combined the idea of the, we were talking about Mondo yesterday and their acquisition by Funko.

Speaker 2 Also, maybe a retraction on that, like maybe that was a clickbait article about Funko only has a year left. But I think in general, it's like no one's surprised that the Funko pops have fallen off.

Speaker 2 But that might not be an accurate thing. It's kind of a wild guess anyway as to when a company is not going to be around anymore.
Anything could happen.

Speaker 1 We don't really know what their reserves are or what their funding looks like.

Speaker 2 But from what I understand, they are very much in a lot of laboo boos could land in their lap at any moment. Yeah.
Who knows?

Speaker 1 You just never know.

Speaker 2 Who knows? But the poster, that undead poster for the Rushi's podcast, I'm going to wrap this story up immediately.

Speaker 2 I attribute it to a collaboration with Mondo. It was inspired by our collaborations with Mondo.
And it was actually Tobin Lee who did the poster.

Speaker 1 Oh, wow.

Speaker 2 And it was like weird because it was also one of those things where I wasn't on the podcast the day they debuted it. So it's like a kind of like a memory hole for for me, but also

Speaker 1 your idea originally.

Speaker 2 Yeah, my idea of, hey, it would be cool if we did like a cool poster for the podcast. And they're like, absolutely.
You only get 300.

Speaker 1 Man, that's awesome. Tobin is a fantastic artist.
He is.

Speaker 2 Just utterly fantastic.

Speaker 2 I've been working

Speaker 2 with him that I would love to show off. But yeah, so it's weird.
Weird connection and coming looping back around. I think actually that might make a good t-shirt, right? Because I don't know.

Speaker 2 Like, posters are not a thing that we make right now.

Speaker 2 Also, let me ask you a question.

Speaker 1 We probably could. Let me ask you a question.
Yeah, okay, go ahead.

Speaker 2 So, if someone that was originally sold as one of 300 and we did a second printing of it, is that bad?

Speaker 1 Well, I guess, no, I mean, because then it's like a second, it's not the same printing, right? Um, it would theoretically

Speaker 1 lower collectible value.

Speaker 2 We could just erase Gus from it.

Speaker 2 You could be, we replace Gus with you. How about that?

Speaker 2 That's what we'll do. And then it'll be a totally different product.
But I think putting on a t-shirt would be pretty cool. I do.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I think we could probably make that happen.

Speaker 2 And then the question then, too, is, do we leave the RT podcast thing on there?

Speaker 1 Oh, the branding of RT Podcasts. Or you just make it like basically an image.

Speaker 2 But then if we do the image, is it like lose the satire part of it? Is it just weird? I don't know.

Speaker 2 I just love the image so much. And the weird thing was, for only 300 posters sold, people posting in the comments, a lot of these ended up to people who listened to this podcast.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 1 they still have them in use, as it were, like on the walls and such. So that's really exciting.
Here's the thing. If you do a second run, are people can like take it off the wall and like throw it?

Speaker 1 What do you say? Because it's no longer collectible. It's not special.
Because it's old.

Speaker 2 That's what I'm saying. I don't want to do anything to like, am I breaching some kind of social contract if I do a second run of them?

Speaker 1 Don't know. Let's let a rock tumble for a little bit, but we'll see what we can do with it.

Speaker 2 Even the speculation, Ashley, could crash the market as we speak. Just me talking about this.

Speaker 1 What is this, Bitcoin?

Speaker 2 I'll be honest with you, though. We're probably not gonna make posters.
Like, that's like shipping and everything else.

Speaker 2 We'll see. We'll see.
I keep saying stuff, but it's like people, I am swayed by what people would like.

Speaker 1 Yeah, and we'll look at it. Posters are something that we haven't really looked into as yet.
So we have to look into the logistics of that.

Speaker 2 Speaking of things we thought would never make their way to a physical product, years ago, I said what would be really cool is if Steam created the console and they called it the 3.

Speaker 2 And on launch day, they released it with Half-Life 3, Portal 3, Team Fortress 3, and I don't know, something else. I forget what it was.

Speaker 2 God of War 3. Why not?

Speaker 1 Just all the threes.

Speaker 2 Not a Valve product, but okay. But if they did that, think about how they would immediately have market share in the console market.

Speaker 1 Well, if you think about it, they're kind of doing that already without having to release their threes. All right.
It's like, you know, no one's like opening the gates being like, release the threes.

Speaker 1 But they can release hardware and have an instant market share because if you can access your Steam gaming library on your TV and play it as a console, sure, why wouldn't you do that?

Speaker 1 I mean, obviously, there are some games that that's never worked great. Like, I don't know that I would want to sit down at the TV and play a game of Civ.

Speaker 1 You know, there are some games that I just, I associate them with keyboard and mouse, and that's it. And they're played at a PC, and that's it.

Speaker 1 But there are a lot of games on Steam that are very controller-friendly. So if you can sit down and you can just play your games on the TV, that's to me, that's already instant market share.

Speaker 1 You don't even have to rebuy a lot of your games to be able to like have a really solid library if you've already been buying on Steam.

Speaker 1 Welcome to the know, I'm Ashy Jenkins.

Speaker 1 Very funny. Ha ha ha.
Okay, so Valve announced a new lineup of their hardware, like a big refresh. Interestingly enough, I don't think the Steam Deck is included.

Speaker 1 I think people are expecting the Steam Deck to at some point, but it's not including this hardware refresh.

Speaker 1 But what's interesting is what is included is: do you remember the Steam Machine from like 10 years ago that they released?

Speaker 2 I think that's what started the conversation around it. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah. And then it kind of.

Speaker 2 Was it called Steam Box back then?

Speaker 1 No, it's called the Steam Machine. And it was like a small form factor PC.

Speaker 1 The idea being it's very console-like, or you know, if you don't have a gaming PC, this can do the job for you. It's not going to play like the really high-end stuff,

Speaker 1 but it's, and it does, I don't think it has a single RGB light inside. You know, it's not glowing

Speaker 2 neon cars.

Speaker 1 I know, I know.

Speaker 2 But a cube, not a hexagon.

Speaker 1 But it plays the games, and you can access your Steam library.

Speaker 1 So they've just announced a refresh on the Steam machine, which I wasn't even expecting because I thought that was one of those things that they'd given up on.

Speaker 1 Sometimes Valve experiments with things, and sometimes things pay off, and sometimes they don't. I guess they've decided 10 years, we're going to do another one.

Speaker 1 So they're doing a new Steam machine, a new Steam controller, which is a choice. I'll be honest.
It's lovely that they have a controller. I will never use that thing.

Speaker 2 The Steam controller has an incredible distinction in my history as a consumer of electronics. Go ahead.
It is, bar none,

Speaker 2 the biggest letdown I ever had when I opened something. Wow.
Because third-party controllers are always kind of like, eh. And first-party controllers, I don't know.

Speaker 2 why there is such a quality discrepancy between a first-party controller, like an Xbox controller and a PlayStation controller versus like the mad cats or even the logitex or whatever they just never feel the same like it feels like it's like 90 it's like and they just didn't bother to go the other 10 so when valve was making their own controller for pc i was like holy shit this is gonna be great i finally have a first party controller essentially on pc i've never been more disappointed in a product it felt like the cheapest plastic it was felt hard in my hands the buttons were like everything about it was a bad experience.

Speaker 1 Like functional, but the experience was off.

Speaker 1 It's like it didn't have the umami, the mouthfeel, right?

Speaker 2 It didn't have the mouthfeel.

Speaker 2 It did not.

Speaker 1 Yeah, my reason for not really being a huge fan is a little bit different. And it actually goes back to the Steam Deck.

Speaker 1 So the Steam Deck has, in addition to, you know, the joysticks and everything, it also has these like touch pads.

Speaker 1 And maybe it's just down to the types of games that I play, but those touch pads have never done anything good for me except like tap things that I'm not trying to tap. Right.

Speaker 1 They just, for me, they just have gotten in the way. And this new Steam controller is like, yes, we took them.

Speaker 1 They, I think the first one had them as well, but it was like, and now we moved them down. Look at that.
Instead of just like doing what I really would have liked and just getting rid of them.

Speaker 2 On the one I had, which I think was the first gen of this thing, I don't know if they'd made other ones, but it was like the touchpad part was like. hard plastic.
It was so strange.

Speaker 2 It was such a strange product to me.

Speaker 1 I assume that it's going to be a lot like the Steam Deck. So go ahead and just have a grope of the Steam Deck and see how you feel about it.

Speaker 2 Yes, yes.

Speaker 2 The Steam Deck was definitely a step up. And it's one of the things that I like about the Steam Deck, even though I don't ever really play it.

Speaker 1 Well, that's because you can't get your hands on it at the moment because I'm playing it.

Speaker 2 I just don't use

Speaker 2 controllerable games on Steam. Most of my games, I need every key on the goddamn keyboard to play on them.

Speaker 1 Yeah, maybe, but a lot of the games that you play on PC are playable on console as well. So they are playable with a gamepad.

Speaker 1 You probably just, it's a difficult mental association to break, or it can be. Once I made this switch, I was very, very happy.

Speaker 1 The other hardware iteration that they've announced that I think that you might be interested in is they announced Steamframe, which is like their new VR headset.

Speaker 1 And it's going into like MetaQuest 3 territory. It's fully contained on its own.

Speaker 1 So the first, you had the, was it the first Valve VR headset that had, you had lighthouses you had to set up around the room, like in corners, and it'd be be very carefully calibrated and they were all tripods and then you also had the the cable coming out the back of the headset that had to go to the PC to run it so all that's gone and it's now much more like the uh like the meta quest uh where it's all self-contained within the headset which i think the meta quest is great because it speaks to me as a gamer where i the category i fall in i'm much more casual about stuff and that used to be like this negative term but it's like i don't want to set up all those lighthouses every single time and watch out don't bump them because they've got a gyroscope in them or mount them on the wall or whatever, or leave tripods up in your living room.

Speaker 2 It's more like a console. And that's what I like about the Steam Machine.
I don't want to keep up with video cards. Like, what RTX are we on? You know what I mean? For from NVIDIA or whatever.

Speaker 2 I don't even know what's a good one at this point.

Speaker 1 Yeah, no, I mean, they, they have, they're in thousands now. That's as far as I've got.
I think the last time I installed one was like a 970. Right.

Speaker 2 Right.

Speaker 1 Which is, but I know we have a newer one, but I think you installed that one.

Speaker 2 I did. And I just bought like, here's how when I build PCs, I basically start with the processor and then the engine for like New Egg, where I tend to buy stuff, or maybe even Amazon.

Speaker 1 Oh, the like PC builder.

Speaker 2 It just recommends people who buy this also bought this. And I go, well, that's good enough for me.
And then I click on that. I put all that stuff in my cart.
I then take a screenshot of the cart.

Speaker 2 Send it to someone I know who keeps up with PC stuff and go, what, what, what do you think? And they go, yeah, it's fine. And then that's, and then I get it.

Speaker 1 Yeah. So a quick, uh, quick Google looks like

Speaker 1 5090s are the hot thing or like the highest that I've seen at this point. 5090 is the number that we're up to now.

Speaker 2 Can you even get those or like are they being bought by crypto miners?

Speaker 1 I don't know. I don't know.
Is that still

Speaker 1 a thing? I mean, obviously, Nvidia is like wildly valuable stock for AI as well. I mean,

Speaker 1 is there still a big issue with scalpers or are they being able to ramp up their production to meet all the demand?

Speaker 2 It's a good question. I don't know.

Speaker 1 Yeah. So, you know, but I'm really excited about what they're doing with the new iteration of hardware.

Speaker 1 I was surprised to see lack of Steam Deck, but I imagine we'll see that as its own separate announcement when they're ready. And it's interesting.
I like that Valve creates this.

Speaker 1 alternative ecosystem, you know, with their hardware. And I love that it exists.
I'll probably get one of the new Steam machines for playing games on the TV. I think that's awesome.

Speaker 2 You know, it's funny is that I feel like you were talking around the edges a little bit for the Valve VR headset. Can you even remember the name of that?

Speaker 1 No, I can't. It's the Vive.
The Vive. There was the Vive.
This one's the frame. I think, I feel like there was one in between.
The Vive as well.

Speaker 1 The index. That's right.
That's what it was. Yeah.
So, yeah, they've had a couple iterations since we last had the Valve headset.

Speaker 2 Which is important for one very specific reason, the Valve VR environment, because

Speaker 2 I guess, and this is going to probably piss some people off.

Speaker 2 I guess

Speaker 2 technically there's been a Half-Life game since Half-Life 2,

Speaker 2 but I don't count it.

Speaker 2 Isn't that weird? Like, people talk about this. They love it.
I played about five minutes of it, and I was like, I can't play it like this. So it's weird.
I just don't count it.

Speaker 2 And there's people who are probably literally have their hand to their chest at this moment going, how damn you can do it.

Speaker 1 Well, it's because it was very an award-winning entry in the series.

Speaker 1 But no, I remember you always had the big thing that, like, if they would just release like the one thing and just unveil it through not like Half-Life Alex, whatever, although I understand that probably helped a lot of

Speaker 1 Vive headsets to move when that came out. But like if they just like, God, what would it do for their hardware if they just were like dropped Half-Life 3, like a proper Half-Life 3?

Speaker 2 When do you think I looked it up today? When do you think from memory

Speaker 2 the last iteration of Half-Life was? And do you remember even what it was?

Speaker 1 Well, I mean, Half-Life, you mean besides Half-Life Alex?

Speaker 2 Right.

Speaker 1 The one they like.

Speaker 1 And it doesn't exist. Okay.

Speaker 1 2012.

Speaker 2 So what was the product? Do you remember? Half-Life 2? So do you really?

Speaker 1 No, it's Half-Life something.

Speaker 2 One of the weirdest chapters in video game publishing was the episodic

Speaker 2 era when everything had an episode.

Speaker 1 Yeah, everyone like basically took the telltale model And went, let's all do that.

Speaker 2 You know, it's a really weird distinction.

Speaker 2 There should be a Hall of Fame for people who started an episodic run of games and finished it because there were so many where they were just like, oh, yeah, this is, people don't want this and we're not doing this anymore.

Speaker 1 Well, they also, at some point, they got into the idea of like, well, if we're doing episodic, then we're treating it like a TV series.

Speaker 1 And think of the number of TV series that just like they get canceled and you get no resolution.

Speaker 1 It's a lot. I don't know why we all watch TV.
It's like all you're doing is like, you're just staring down the barrel of like narrative blue balls almost all the time.

Speaker 2 Yeah, especially if the like, it's, it's interesting. You think they would finish more shows even with just like a hour and a half episode or something just to not kill the back catalog.

Speaker 2 Because now you're looking at all these like hanging chads, you know, when you go to watch something.

Speaker 2 And it's like the back catalog, I can tell you from experience, is a valuable part of any media company.

Speaker 1 Fucking man, those hanging chads, I just can't deal with it.

Speaker 2 If you've got like, that's an old reference.

Speaker 1 Hanging Chad.

Speaker 2 You don't know what Hanging Chad is? Hanging Chad. So Hanging Chad is, this goes back to.

Speaker 1 It sounds like someone's dressed inappropriately is what it sounds like.

Speaker 2 Oh, like they're hanging dong? Yeah. No, no, no.
Hanging Chad.

Speaker 2 I'm so old, I thought everyone would immediately understand this reference. Hanging Chad was from the 2000 presidential election in the U.S.
between Al Gore and George W. Bush.

Speaker 2 And it came down to a handful of ballots, a handful, maybe more than a handful, three or four handfuls, of ballots in Florida. And they had to go count them all.

Speaker 1 This part I do remember.

Speaker 2 They had to count them all by hand. And it was a punch card system where people would punch out the square of the vote for the candidate that they wanted, right?

Speaker 2 And they would put it in like this frame in order to do it and all that stuff.

Speaker 2 There were some was, does it count if the square is punched out but hasn't fully dislodged from the ballot? What? Like it's hanging hanging on by a quarter if it's a hanging Chad.

Speaker 2 Obviously, I mean, if you think about that election and what an inflection point that was for America, just whether or not a perforation held on determined whether or not somebody was president of the United States.

Speaker 1 Congratulations, Bernie. You just made me really mad this morning.

Speaker 2 It looks like the very angry about everything. The government has now restarted in the U.S.

Speaker 2 So, yay, government's back. Everybody's super excited.

Speaker 1 They're doing a lot of work.

Speaker 2 Yeah, raising healthcare care premiums for everybody in the nation. That is really about to hit.
When they hit open enrollment for the Affordable Care Act, which is coming, I believe.

Speaker 2 In a couple of days.

Speaker 2 Coming in a couple of days. Like Monday, this will probably be the big story.
We talked last week about Tehran. That continues.
Like, they're getting close now to doing evacuations.

Speaker 1 Yes.

Speaker 2 They're talking about relocating the city. Like, that's insane.

Speaker 1 I would love to see the logistics for that. But yeah, they basically their rainfall has fallen like 90%.

Speaker 1 Their aquifers are drained. The lakes are under 10% capacity.
Even if they got enough rain to correct that, that rain would cause all its own problems, right? Like that much rain.

Speaker 1 Like imagine getting like 10

Speaker 1 times the amount of rain you've got all year all at once. That's that would even if it refilled the water.
Now you've got another problem in that you were Atlantis and that you're now underwater.

Speaker 1 You know, so I mean, that's, it's a scary, scary thing. Uh, and I just, no one seems to see an end in which the water gets fixed in the time that they need it.

Speaker 2 It's like that old proverb of living in interesting times, right? Right. Now we're hitting interesting times in like so many different categories.
Right. We can only take one at a time, right?

Speaker 1 Right. Like, right, we've got a, we've got a solar flare right now.
I, we, I can only focus on like one or two things at a time, okay?

Speaker 2 Yeah, that caused a radio disruption. Yeah.

Speaker 1 The strongest solar flare of the year was like a day or two ago. Also, I think caused a lot of magnetic storms.
So the Aurora Borealis was visible to the naked eye for a lot of people.

Speaker 1 And that's got to be, you know,

Speaker 1 once again, we take the small happinesses where we can. When we're like, what is happening everywhere? Is that imagine just looking at the sky and seeing the aurora, like this huge ribbon of light.

Speaker 2 Things that happen to you on an... astronomical scale are so hard to comprehend sometimes.

Speaker 2 Like you see these images of the sun, you see the bright spot spot and you're like, oh, that's the solar flare.

Speaker 2 And then you read the article and it's like, yeah, the spot that you're seeing on that, that's the size of 12 million Earths or something like that. You know what I mean? It's just like, holy cow.

Speaker 2 Can't even comprehend our star's size in relation to our planets.

Speaker 1 Right. Like it's like I have difficulty sometimes comprehending the size of the Earth when you like, you know, you look outside and you look at, you know, like a town, whatever, or city, even a city.

Speaker 1 It's like, it's a big city. It's a lot of, it's a lot of stuff.
It's a lot of space.

Speaker 1 uh and then you take it and you zoom out to like the whole world and you it's not even it doesn't even register yeah right like the so when you get to a global scale that's already insane to me and i have trouble wrapping my head around it when you're like oh yeah 12 million of these global scales that's the size of the sun farting a little bit right right when you think about it too it's like we were talking about the amount of cubic liters that are needed in order to feed or to excuse me what's the word i'm saying what do you say feed but but for water?

Speaker 2 In order to

Speaker 2 water. I've never told to water the water.
How come I've never

Speaker 2 a horse?

Speaker 2 So this just goes to show

Speaker 2 I don't have a word for

Speaker 2 to provide water to someone.

Speaker 2 Like we have a word for providing food. I'm going to feed you, but if I'm going to give you water, I'm going to water you.

Speaker 1 I guess it's the.

Speaker 2 I'm going to douse you.

Speaker 2 But it just shows how unprecedented this is that we don't need a word for that.

Speaker 2 And that this is an unprecedented event. I love etymology and language in general because it just goes to show we come up with words for things that are necessary for us to have.

Speaker 2 I don't have a word for to give someone water.

Speaker 1 No, we just use the name of the drink as a verb like wine me.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 1 I mean, or like give me wine. Wine me, uh, water me.
Uh, no, bev me.

Speaker 2 Are you feeding them? Yeah, you're feet. Am I feeding you water?

Speaker 2 Anyway, the amount of water it takes for a city of 10 million people to drink for two weeks and if it's like that's not being replenished what do you do it's crazy it's crazy to think about this stuff yeah and here we are having to think about it yes uh and not only that but uh also uh a new

Speaker 1 thank thankfully as far as i'm aware extinct um

Speaker 1 version of crocodile has been uncovered. Evidence of a tree climbing drop croc.

Speaker 2 got to, can I guess where this lived? You may. Did it live in Australia? Yeah, it didn't live in Australia.
You're shitting me. I'm not.

Speaker 1 Otherwise, I'm sure they would have had to call it something besides the drop croc.

Speaker 2 A drop crock? It would fall out of trees?

Speaker 1 It would like climb trees and yeah, I guess like fall on its prey.

Speaker 1 Like, though, can that sounds silly, but can you imagine like you're a little, you're a little kangaroo or something, right? You're like hopping happily through the forest where the trees are,

Speaker 1 and you look up and then just like suddenly blotting out the sun is like a crocodile that's gonna like flatten you and then devour you.

Speaker 1 How terrifying would that be? I mean, obviously it didn't work out, right? That was a nice idea. They tried it.
They decided to go in another direction with their crocodile technology.

Speaker 1 Otherwise, they got out-competed. Otherwise, we would be dealing with drop crocs in Australia right now.

Speaker 2 Right. But what would you rather have? That or the version of crocodiles we have now, which is you just approach the shore and it appears out of nowhere and drags you into the depths.

Speaker 1 Right. That's

Speaker 2 pretty terrible already. It is pretty terrible.
Probably just worked on their technique and found what was the real crowd pleaser. The worst part

Speaker 1 the worst part of it, honestly, is how stupid crocodiles look, right? Like I like, I would be embarrassed to be killed by a crocodile, not because I don't recognize their strength,

Speaker 1 their absolutely terrifying lack of need to have evolved over the past millennia because what they've been doing works.

Speaker 1 Obviously, when they went away from the dropping out of trees, they found the right solution.

Speaker 1 But they look so silly. When you see them like hanging, like in the water and they're just like on like their tippy toes, just they're just just just chilling in the water.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's like their back feet are kind of on the bottom and they're and they're just like their noses are up there.

Speaker 1 And they look stupid and they shouldn't look stupid when they're that fucking scary.

Speaker 2 To be fair, they don't know about that view. Like they've lived in murky ponds or whatever their whole life.
They're not used to having glass where you can see their little posture that they made.

Speaker 2 Otherwise, they probably would have fixed it a long time ago.

Speaker 1 Well, I appreciate that they don't have to deal with the social anxiety of how they look.

Speaker 2 It's like when a dad goes into the shallow end and does that crouch where they put their head down, you know, and you do that, like, like, crouch duck walk.

Speaker 1 Same thing. And then every dad, it's like that's something that like the baby pops out and you just, all the dads in the room drop.

Speaker 2 Go to the shallow end.

Speaker 2 Do the crouch walk. And if there was glass on the side, you could see how ridiculous you look doing that.
You probably would stop it immediately. Maybe, maybe.
The crocodiles just don't.

Speaker 2 So I want to wrap up a little tangent that we went off on there. Going back to Half-Life, I looked it up.
Half-Life Episode 2, which ended on an incredible cliffhanger that debuted in 2007.

Speaker 2 So neglecting the huge award-winning critically acclaimed Half-Life Alex, it's been almost 20 years since a Half-Life rock.

Speaker 1 I feel like we're due with three. Do you think they're working? Do you think they're working on it?

Speaker 2 Oh, I bring that up because there's total speculation about it. And people were looking through the announcement videos yesterday.

Speaker 1 Can I be fair? There's always been speculation about it.

Speaker 2 It has revived. Exactly.
There was always the Half-Life 3, if you don't keep up with video game news, was like this mythical thing that was going to come any day now.

Speaker 2 I think it has kind of transferred.

Speaker 1 Every time they've built a new engine or updated their engines or anytime they've put anything out, there's always speculation. And it's because they're preparing for Half-Life 3.

Speaker 2 What if they released Half-Life 3 on the old GTA 6 date? What if that was it? And GTA found out about that.

Speaker 2 Nope.

Speaker 1 They were scared. Is there any, do you, yeah, do you think like, like everyone, every franchise fears GTA, right? Right.
But who does GTA fear?

Speaker 2 Well, somebody was saying that, too, about Half-Life or this Valve announcement is like, it seems like everyone's moving away from the console market.

Speaker 2 And then all of a sudden, you know, Valve comes in with essentially their entry in it all of a sudden. Like, we'll do this.
You know what I mean? Yeah.

Speaker 2 You see, Microsoft even made a statement about it. Did they? Yeah, the statement Microsoft, I think Phil Spector made it.

Speaker 2 He said something like, people, of course, ask this comment, well, what do you think about this with everything that's going on in the console world these days?

Speaker 2 And he basically said, well, as the biggest provider of games, as a publisher on PC, this is very exciting for me.

Speaker 2 I was like, yeah, that's a good way to

Speaker 1 put that. That is one thing that I think people have overlooked a lot is like, if you're playing on a PC, at some level, Microsoft wins.
Xbox might not win, but Microsoft won.

Speaker 2 And on a couple of levels, too, because I'm going to assume that what is the Steam?

Speaker 1 Oh, no, it's running Steam OS. Okay.
So it's running

Speaker 1 their own OS, which is based on Linux.

Speaker 1 But once again, like all the publishing and all that goes into it, I don't think people realized for a really long time

Speaker 1 that Apple was one of Microsoft's biggest points of profit because of Office. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Because if you were using a Microsoft product, it doesn't have to be in Windows, it doesn't have to be in Microsoft's operating system.

Speaker 1 You're probably using some of their products in some fashion and they're making money from it.

Speaker 2 From what I always heard from friends who worked at Microsoft, that nobody could really compete with Office in terms of the revenue that they generated.

Speaker 2 And like everyone would thump their chest about their numbers and their growth and all that stuff. And they'd be in the corporate cafeteria.

Speaker 2 And then the Office team would come in with their letter jackets,

Speaker 2 push people out of the way,

Speaker 2 Jump to the front of the line.

Speaker 1 They walk up to the Xbox team and they're like, What's up, nerd? Nice lunch. And they just like slam their tray on the ground.

Speaker 2 What are you working on? Hardware? Good luck with that, pal.

Speaker 2 All right. 18th version of Word that does the exact same fucking thing.

Speaker 1 Oh, man, look at that, nerd. What's he working on?

Speaker 2 The Ark Mice? Yeah, you know, we're shipping next year. You can insert an image into a Word document.
It doesn't ruin it. Yeah.

Speaker 2 I've been working on that one for about 40 years.

Speaker 1 Still haven't shipped that one, have they?

Speaker 2 Thousandth stage beta testing on that one.

Speaker 2 All right, Ashley, who do we have to thank for being our sweet little steam machines today?

Speaker 1 Big thank you to Andrew Miller and Yeehaw for sponsoring this episode of our show at patreon.com slash morning somewhere and roosterteeth.com.

Speaker 2 All right, don't forget, reminder that today's drop, which was...

Speaker 1 Yeah,

Speaker 2 is

Speaker 2 first person to leave at my total discretion. Comment on the Rooster Teeth website for this episode.

Speaker 2 Where that comes from and who said it. I will send you a code for a free t-shirt.
All right, that does it for us today, everybody. 11:13-2025.
We will be back to talk to you tomorrow.

Speaker 2 We hope you will be here as well.

Speaker 1 At least we got one three today.