832. Q&AF: Too Hard On Myself, Achieving Bigger Goals & Bouncing Back From Big Failures

Speaker 0 Yeah, we're sleeping on the floor.

Speaker 1 Now, my druid box froze. Fuck up both, fuck up stove.
Counted millions in a cold. Bad bitch, booted swole.
Got a own bank rope. Can't fold.
That's a no. Head shot.
Case close.

Speaker 1 What is up, guys? It's Andy for Sella, and this is the show for the realists. Say goodbye to the lies, the fakeness, and delusions of modern society.
And welcome to motherfucking reality, guys.

Speaker 1 Today, we have QAF. That's where you submit the questions and we we give you the answers.
You can submit your questions a couple different ways.

Speaker 2 The first way is, guys, email these questions into askandy atandyforsella.com.

Speaker 1 Or you go on YouTube, drop your question in the comments section on the Q ⁇ A F episodes. We'll choose some from there as well.
Now, throughout the week, we've got shows within the show.

Speaker 1 We're going to have CTI tomorrow. That stands for Cruise the Internet.
That's where we put topics on the screen. We speculate on what's going on.
We talk about what's true and what's not true.

Speaker 1 And then we talk about how we, the people, have to solve these problems going on in the world. Other times we have real talk.

Speaker 1 We throw those in once in a while, five to 20 minutes of me giving you some real talk. And then we have 75 Hard Verses.
That's where someone who has completed the 75 Hard Program comes on the show.

Speaker 1 They talk about how their life was before, how their life is now, and how you can use the 75 Hard Program to transform your life.

Speaker 1 If you're unfamiliar with the 75 Hard Program, it is the initial phase of the Live Hard program. The Live Hard program is the world's most famous mental transformation program ever, and it's free.

Speaker 1 You can get it for free on our podcast audio feed only. It's not on YouTube.
Podcast audio feed only, episode 208. Give you the entire program for free.

Speaker 1 If you're someone who wants to know the intricate details of the program, you could buy the book. The book is available at andyforsella.com.
It is called the book on mental toughness.

Speaker 1 It has the entire Live Hard program plus a whole bunch of chapters on mental toughness, why it's important, how you can use it to cultivate the life of your dreams.

Speaker 1 And you can get that at andyforcella.com. Again, that's the book on mental toughness.

Speaker 1 One thing about our show before we get going here is we do things a little bit different. We don't run ads on the show unless it's for this amazing first form Screaming Freedom energy drink.

Speaker 1 We might run an ad or two on that, but otherwise we don't run ads. And I don't run ads because I don't want to listen to someone tell me what I can and can't say.

Speaker 1 We try to keep it real here and we ask very simply in exchange for that, that you help us grow the show. Okay.

Speaker 1 So if the show makes you think, if it makes you laugh, if it gives you new perspective, if it's something that you think needs to be shared, do us a favor. Don't be a hoe.

Speaker 2 Share the show. All right.
I'll up you one there. I got one cracked open.
What you got?

Speaker 1 A little scream of freedom. Oh, yeah.
I want to scream of freedom today, too, bro.

Speaker 2 Makes me want to scream some freedom.

Speaker 1 It does. Scream

Speaker 1 the freedom. Let freedom scream.
You know what I'm saying? Let freedom scream.

Speaker 1 What's going on, though, man? Nothing, dude.

Speaker 1 Ready to kick some ass. Yeah.

Speaker 2 Make some people better. Yeah, let's go.
It never felt so good.

Speaker 1 Never feels good.

Speaker 1 So good

Speaker 1 than it does today to make people better. I don't know what you're trying.
I don't know. Let's just do the show, man.

Speaker 1 I just got it.

Speaker 1 Give me what you got. Yeah, I'll give it to you, man.
Okay, I know you will.

Speaker 2 Yeah, guys, I got three good ones for you, man.

Speaker 1 Are you sick over there? Are you

Speaker 1 cold?

Speaker 1 You're cold? Bro, it's freezing in here. Is it?

Speaker 2 I really believe Klein comes in here and fucks with the thermostat. It's possible.
You know what I'm saying? You told me.

Speaker 1 You guys are all cold in here? Really? It's freezing.

Speaker 1 Maybe you all should be hiding here all day.

Speaker 2 It's my only safe space, man. It's my safe space in here.
Yeah, man. Well, guys, let's get better today, guys.
We got three good ones for you, Andy.

Speaker 2 Guys, Andy, question number one.

Speaker 2 Andy, I'm the kind of person who spends hours agonizing over every little detail, whether it's a work project or decorating my home. It's exhausting.

Speaker 2 And even when I finish something, I rarely feel satisfied. My friends tell me I'm too hard on myself, but I feel like if I let go of my standards, I'll be mediocre.

Speaker 2 How can I learn to embrace imperfection without feeling like I'm settling for less?

Speaker 2 Let's get this kicked off, Andy.

Speaker 1 Well, first of all, perfection will keep you ignorant and unskilled. Okay, if you were perfect all the time, how could you learn how to be any better?

Speaker 1 And this is something that people have a really hard time with. They set out, they want to do everything perfect, which by the way, you should want to do everything perfect.

Speaker 1 But what happens is that they have a, you know, a hiccup or they have an obstacle or something doesn't go the way that they want and they refuse to acknowledge the value in that situation.

Speaker 1 And the truth of the matter is over the course of your life, over the course of your career, the mistakes you make are much more valuable than the perfection that you execute upon because the mistakes that you make are the things that teach you the skills the resilience the grit the fortitude and everything that you need to know to be successful long-term so instead of being upset that you're not perfect in the beginning, you should be thankful that you're making these mistakes in the beginning when nobody's really paying attention to you.

Speaker 1 Because if you were to make those same mistakes 20 years from now, when you're running a hundred million dollar operation

Speaker 1 everybody's going to see them okay so

Speaker 1 and let's break this down further you can't get to a hundred million dollar operation being perfect because you're not going to be able to learn the skills that are required to operate at that level and then all the levels that come along the way so

Speaker 1 you're saying you will fail before you even get that yeah but but dude listen the reason that people struggle is because they don't put enough value on the failures that they have.

Speaker 1 They're embarrassed, they get upset, they feel stupid, they start having doubts, but they don't realize that every single business and every single entrepreneur and every single person that they look up to, the reason that you look up to them is very simple.

Speaker 1 They are willing to go out, they are willing to fall on their face over and over and over again.

Speaker 1 They don't give a shit what anybody thinks about it, they don't care what their friends say, they don't care what the media says, they don't care what anybody says, they're willing to fall down on their face, understanding that whatever happens past that, they won't make that same mistake again.

Speaker 1 And they keep moving. Being successful in anything is so simple.

Speaker 1 It's just that people aren't willing to go through the process of being embarrassed in front of people who, quite honestly, aren't going to matter over the course of your life.

Speaker 1 So instead of wanting to be perfect, Do your best to be perfect.

Speaker 1 And then when you mess up, instead of getting down on yourself, instead of, you know, feeling bad, instead of beating yourself up, say, hey, all right, that's good.

Speaker 1 I learned that right here from this, and I'll never make that mistake again.

Speaker 1 And then when you're doing 10, 20, 50, 100, 200, 500 million dollars, and that same situation presents itself, you're going to remember, hmm, the last time I did that, this is what happened.

Speaker 1 And if I do that same thing now, it's going to cost me this much more.

Speaker 1 So look, dude, if you you want to have a excruciating time being an entrepreneur try to be perfect and get mad at yourself every time you mess up if you want to enjoy the process and you want to enjoy it as much as you can because it is a brutal journey and it's very difficult and it's hard for everybody including you including me including anybody else learn to value the things that you're learning from the mistakes that you make just as much as you value the perfection that you happen to hit by accident along the way.

Speaker 1 You know what I'm saying? It is by accident, isn't it? Yeah, of course.

Speaker 1 If you don't have the skills and you don't, you know, like,

Speaker 1 you know, there's a thing there, you could, you can hit a fucking home run without being a good hitter. Swing enough bats.
Yeah, right. Like something.

Speaker 1 Look, man, you're going to do things right sometimes. That doesn't mean you're skilled.

Speaker 1 So don't let your ego get out in front of you and think just because you've done a couple things in the beginning that you actually have the skills because the skills can only come from

Speaker 1 making mistakes over and over and over again or watching other people make mistakes and learning from their mistakes, which is a great way to learn as well.

Speaker 2 Yeah, you know, Andy, you talk about, you know, even just like actualizing your own individual success. Like it's a, it's, it's a strive thing, right? Like you're never actually going to reach that.

Speaker 2 So you look at perfection pretty much the same way. Like you're not going to really ever reach that fucking pivotal, but you're always striving to get as close to it as possible, right?

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 I mean, look, dude, we're on a time scale, okay you're gonna run out of time eventually like the best entrepreneurs that i've ever met they act like they're gonna live forever you talk to these people that are in their 70s and they're talking for the next 30 years it's like bro you're gonna be in a box right you know what i'm saying but like they don't think they don't think that way and like for example like if you took a guy like Jeff Bezos, I think Jeff Bezos is around 60 or so, right?

Speaker 1 You take a guy like Bezos, you take everything he knows, right? And you give him 30 more years. He's going to accomplish a whole bunch more.
But what's he going to learn in those 30 years?

Speaker 1 And then if he were able to live to 200, what would he be able to accomplish because of what he's learned the last 30 years of his life?

Speaker 1 So when you think about like what potential is for an individual, you have to understand

Speaker 1 that it's capped

Speaker 1 only by the amount of time that we have. And so if you actually subscribe to the idea of always improving, always getting better,

Speaker 1 actualizing your own potential, like you said, you're never going to be able to reach your potential because you're gaining skills along the way through the process that you don't have time to fucking execute on at the end of your life.

Speaker 1 Does that make sense?

Speaker 1 So the day that you die, if you've given it everything that you have, you actually have more skill and more potential than you've ever had before, which is why it's important to like transfer that knowledge as you go, right?

Speaker 1 But,

Speaker 1 you know, it's weird to think about, but I think, you know, when you think about what you're going to be the most proud of as a driven individual, and look, dude, we're not talking to regular Joe's here, okay?

Speaker 1 We're talking to driven people. We have to, we have to clarify that.

Speaker 1 When you, you guys who are driven individuals who are hungry, who are the go-getters, who want to win, when you guys get out to,

Speaker 1 you know, the end of your life, you're going to have regrets. And the reality is, is you get to choose through your actions what regrets you're going to have.

Speaker 1 And for entrepreneurs and people who are driven to achieve, build, create, um,

Speaker 1 and who drive society in the proper direction, those people are always going to ask themselves. They're going to say, well, did I give it everything I had? Could I have done more?

Speaker 1 What could I have done? Right. And they're going to pay the price probably in some other areas of life.
All right. That's the reality.
But that's the trade-off. Yeah.

Speaker 1 You're going to have a trade, dude. You're not going to have it all.
Everybody who says you're going to have it all is, you're not going to have it all. It's a trade.
So,

Speaker 1 but certain people are wired for this kind of life.

Speaker 1 And if you're the kind of person that's wired for that life, a lot of reflection is going to come down to, did I do everything I could to maximize what I'm wired to do? And

Speaker 1 if you subscribe to the idea of your potential always expanding and your skill set always expanding,

Speaker 1 you know, you're going to be proud of what you did because you're going to say, yeah, I continue to improve. I continue to innovate.
I continue to reinvent myself. I continue to push.

Speaker 1 I continue to create. I continue to build.
And I did that my whole life and I did everything I fucking could with the amount of time that I was given.

Speaker 1 And dude, that's a noble thing because most people don't live that way.

Speaker 1 And then if you take that same idea and you apply it to, let's say, your relationship or you apply it to your friendships or you apply it to your family, you can really have a really good,

Speaker 1 well-rounded life without feeling like you have too many regrets. Like you're always going to have some regrets.

Speaker 1 Man, you know, I missed a couple of those soccer games or, you know, whatever it fuck is, right? But,

Speaker 1 but there's a trade-off for the quality of life that you're going to have for the things that, you know, you're going to ultimately regret. And that's just reality.

Speaker 1 There's no way to get out of your life without looking back and being like, fuck,

Speaker 1 I should have handled that different.

Speaker 2 Yeah, I think, and I think too, for most, for majority of people, that conversation, that, that talk happens at the end of it, right? For sure. If you're lucky, though, you have the awareness.

Speaker 2 Well, you have some near-death experiences.

Speaker 1 You know,

Speaker 1 also push that. I'll tell you this.
I mean, look, man,

Speaker 1 every enlightened person that is like totally gets it, they've always had some sort of near-death experience. Yeah.
Like. Because you're having that conversation right there.
Okay.

Speaker 1 So when I got stabbed when I was 23, it was people, people get like so weird when I say, dude, it was the best thing that ever happened to me.

Speaker 1 Well, the reason, one of of the reasons, there was a lot of reasons. It humbled me.
It taught me a lot. Taught me how to treat people better.
There's a whole lot of things.

Speaker 1 But one of the main things that it taught me is that your time is finite.

Speaker 1 And when that happened, I went from like, kind of being like, I'm just being real, kind of like a tub of shit, you know, really not giving too much effort into my life, kind of like, you know, it'll work itself out to being an aggressively

Speaker 1 driven individual because of that. Cause I'm like, fuck, dude, that could be taken away from me in a second.
I don't know when that's going to happen. So I'm going to fucking go hard.
Right.

Speaker 1 And everybody I know that has gone super, super hard, they all, you can always trace it back to something where their uh mortality was in jeopardy. Yeah.
You know,

Speaker 2 and that conversation came real. Like, shit, if I'm gone right now, what did I do?

Speaker 1 Yeah. That's right, dude.

Speaker 2 Yeah, man. That's right.
I love it, man. I love it.
So, so don't be satisfied. Always works to do better and learn from the mistakes.
I love it, man. Guys, Andy.
Question number two.

Speaker 2 Hey, Andy, I'm currently on day 27 of 75 Hard.

Speaker 2 I am learning so much about myself and my self-discipline.

Speaker 2 I have worked in healthcare for over 25 years in different genres, long-term care, day treatment, nursing homes, inpatient psych, and most recently in hospitals.

Speaker 2 I'm not a clinician, but a manager of over 250 volunteers in a prestigious academic medical center. I'm really good at what I do, and I have picked up so much knowledge along the way.

Speaker 2 I have a bachelor's degree and a master's degree, and I know I can do more.

Speaker 2 The other day, I listened to my boss's voice and reached out to the CEO and chief human resources officer for the entire system to ask them their thoughts of going back to school to attain a higher level within the system.

Speaker 2 So, I now have a meeting with the chief HR officer to discuss my qualifications and what I can do. I know I can do more.

Speaker 2 And I'm wondering if you have any advice for me that that I can use in my upcoming meeting. Thanks in advance.

Speaker 1 Well, first of all, you can do even more than that. Like

Speaker 1 you guys have to understand, all right, all these people that you look up to, all these people that you think have these special skills or they're in these super high achievement areas of life, these people, very few of them, have any special skills that you don't have.

Speaker 1 Most of these people are just regular people. They are people just like you, bro.
They put their pants on like you. They have problems just like you.
They get frustrated. They get angry.

Speaker 1 They get disappointed. They get excited.
They do stupid shit just like you. Okay.
There's no difference.

Speaker 1 And we make a mistake as humans when we look at other people and we say, they have something that I don't, or they must be more qualified than me, or they must be smarter than me, or they come from a better family, or they were born with more advantages and we're experts at telling ourselves all these reasons as to why other people are and we aren't okay and we have to get out of that habit because every single great thing that's ever been created in the history of the world was created by a human being and guess what you are

Speaker 1 you are a human being just like them you have access to more information to more skill set to faster learning than anybody who has ever existed before you in the history of earth so what is it about you that makes you incapable compared to everybody else and i'm going to give you the answer the answer is nothing the answer is the belief in your ability to achieve and become things that nobody you have ever seen in your own

Speaker 1 universe has done and that is our limiting beliefs We look at everybody we know personally and we look at them and we say, okay, well, that's the most successful guy I know. He's a doctor.

Speaker 1 He makes $400,000 a year or makes $700,000 a year. He's got a nice house.
He drives a Mercedes. That is the limit of what I could maybe do.
And I'm probably way below that because he's a doctor. Okay.

Speaker 1 So we are, and what are we told growing up? We're told these things. Think about in school, dude.

Speaker 1 When you're in a little bitty kid, your parents, if you had decent parents, they'll tell you, you could be anything you want. You could be the president one day, right?

Speaker 1 But then you go to school and in first grade, second grade, third grade, you know, they'll entertain that shit.

Speaker 1 But by the time you're in fifth, sixth, seventh grade, they've started the process of indoctrinating you into your own limitations.

Speaker 1 They've started telling you, hey, DJ, I know you said you wanted to be a president, but you need to be more realistic okay we need we need to we need to get you you know maybe you could work at 7-eleven you know that'd be a good you could be the president of 7-Eleven right and they start telling you all this shit and instilling doubt in you and bro these are the this is what's wrong with the education system we we deal and by the way it's not just the education system it's our culture okay your parents will start telling you that they'll start telling you well you better you better figure it out because you got a you only got a few more years left till you're out on your own and they start putting all this extra pressure and doubt inside of us.

Speaker 1 And then we get to high school, right? And we're like, you know, little DJ is like, well, I want to be president.

Speaker 1 And you tell your friends that and they fucking make fun of you and they throw you in a locker, right? So

Speaker 1 over the course of time, our dreams, our goals, our aspirations, our belief in ourselves is watered down by the environment that we all grow up in.

Speaker 1 And I believe, like we talk about on CTI, that that environment is intentionally created for the prop of the proposition of controlling the population. All right.

Speaker 1 They listen to Tuesdays and Friday shows for that.

Speaker 2 Come back tomorrow for that one.

Speaker 1 Yeah. But the point is, guys, is that you don't really have limits.
You have what you have been told your limits are, and you have chosen to believe that those are your limits.

Speaker 1 And that's why you have this problem going for the things you really want and instead going for the things that are more realistic. Right?

Speaker 1 Like, man, I'd really like to have that, you know, that 40-ounce ribeye,

Speaker 1 but I'll take that three-ounce fucking strip stake instead. It's almost the same thing.
No, it's not. There's a big fucking difference.
Okay.

Speaker 1 And there's a big difference in you settling for this mediocre position and you actually going for what you want to be. So I say all that to say this.

Speaker 1 I think it's great that you're taking initiative. I think it's great that you are starting to move in the right direction.
I salute you. I think it's amazing.

Speaker 1 I think you need to continue on the Live Hard program for a number of years because the more years you do it, the more belief you will instill in yourself

Speaker 1 with the idea that you're going to get to a place where you're going to go to the max distance of what you really want.

Speaker 1 And that's what my suggestion would be for you.

Speaker 1 Take the baby step right now. You're already in the process of it, but don't make that the step.
That's a stepping stone to where you really want to be.

Speaker 1 And I would start thinking about where you really want to be and start taking action for what you really want to do because big dreams create big action, which create big results.

Speaker 1 And little dreams create little action, which creates a little bitty life that we end up regretting. So

Speaker 1 you're much better than you think you are.

Speaker 1 And you need to remember that most of the doubt and most of the things that you struggle with were installed in you by people around you who have already given up on what their life could have been.

Speaker 1 And they want you to do so as well because it makes them feel more comfortable about their mediocre existence.

Speaker 2 Right. It's all people

Speaker 2 who limited themselves

Speaker 2 passing this shit. Yeah, it's crazy.

Speaker 1 Yeah, bro. It's crazy.
It's everybody.

Speaker 1 Do you know how many people told me over the course of my life? Okay, I'm 45 years old. You know, I don't even want to say what I'm worth because people get pissed, but it ain't fucking nine figures.

Speaker 1 Yeah, right. Okay.
It's more than that. Doing all right.
Yeah. I've built a bunch of different companies, been very successful, done a lot of fucking big things.

Speaker 1 And I was, I was the dumbest motherfucker ever. If you go back in grade school, everybody made fun of me.
I got picked on. In high school, I was a CD student.

Speaker 1 You know, there's not a single teacher that I ever fucking had ever that would fucking, would have said, Andy Versello is going to turn out like I have turned out. Not a single one.

Speaker 1 And that's no disrespect to them. Okay.
Cause I didn't figure it out till after that. And if I had looked at me in high school, I would say the same.

Speaker 1 But I got to a point where I'm like, you know what, dude? I don't want any of these motherfuckers' lives.

Speaker 1 I just don't. And that's, that's, and that is not me looking my nose down to whatever someone chooses for themselves.
That's just not what I wanted. Okay.
I wanted to make a lot of money.

Speaker 1 I wanted to be successful. I wanted to travel.
I wanted to have nice shit. I wanted to build companies.
That is what I chose for myself. And I didn't let anybody talk me out of it.

Speaker 1 Like when people would say, you know, little remarks and things like, dude, your little vitamin shop or this or that.

Speaker 1 Like, bro, I never, for one time, did I think like, fuck, all we're going to be is a little vitamin shop.

Speaker 1 I would get like pissed and I would look at the motherfucker in my head and I'd be like, dude, fuck you.

Speaker 1 Like, I'm going to show you, bro. Watch this.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 And, and, and I, and we've done it, you know, and Sal's wired the same way. My business partners are all, anybody I'm in business with has that chip on their shoulder.
Yeah, don't believe in us, bro.

Speaker 1 Fucking doubt us. Fucking make fun of us.
Laugh, giggle, make remarks.

Speaker 1 Please do because I take all of that shit and I turn it into productive energy and I end up stepping on your fucking throat with that. So

Speaker 1 we have to learn as individuals to take all the negativity and disbelief and doubt and limits that people put on us and turn it into real action and shove it down their fucking throats.

Speaker 1 That's what you have to do.

Speaker 1 If you can't do that, you won't succeed because you get so much negativity and so much limiting belief and so much doubt and so much bullshit that happens over the course of the journey that you're on that if you can't take it and turn it into productive action, it's going to wear you down, bro.

Speaker 1 It'll crush you.

Speaker 1 So you have to have it. It's not an option.
And we have these people who say all this idealistic shit on the internet. Oh, don't do it to prove them wrong.
Do it to prove them right.

Speaker 1 What the fuck have you done?

Speaker 1 You see what I'm saying, bro? Like, bro, we have this scenario where people want to make,

Speaker 1 there's nobody that's that tough that can take all of that criticism, all of that pain, all of that doubt, all of that shit and fucking just wear it and not use it. You have to use it.

Speaker 1 We only have so much energy available to us. We have positive energy.
Hey, I believe in you.

Speaker 1 Hey,

Speaker 1 you're qualified. Bro, listen, you can do this.
Okay, there's that. And then there's, what the fuck are you thinking? Bro, that's not for people like you.

Speaker 1 You better be realistic, dude. You're going to be broke.
Now, let me ask you, there's fucking six people in this room. Do you get more positive or do you get more negative?

Speaker 2 You're going to get way more negative, bro.

Speaker 1 What do you guys get?

Speaker 1 Every single motherfucker in here has gotten more negative than positive.

Speaker 1 Well, if you can only use the small amount of positive and you can't use the negative, you're missing out on most of the energy required to get where you want to go.

Speaker 1 So you have to learn to have that chip on your shoulder and you have to learn how to process negativity in order to produce the positive outcome that you're looking to create. Yeah.

Speaker 2 I want to hit on this, man, because I think it's important.

Speaker 2 You said, you know, you like, and we don't want to look down on anybody if that's what they chose to do. Problem is, most people are settling in their lives.

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 1 you know what I'm saying? You're correct. Here's what you're saying.
And I agree with you. I have no problem

Speaker 1 with anybody. In fact, I admire people who are living the way they want to live.

Speaker 2 If it's actually their choice.

Speaker 1 If it's genuine and authentically what they want. Yeah, bro.
But there's so, but that's not most people.

Speaker 1 Most people settle and then pretend. that that's what they actually wanted so that they can be noble.

Speaker 1 You know, I'm, you know, I could have done all that, but you know i chose to do bro i watched you you didn't do shit you laid on your couch and off you didn't try to do anything right and you got what you got and now you're pretending like that's what you wanted right you're lying in that yeah yeah bro listen they're it's all bullshit Most people never become anything because they're lazy, they don't believe in themselves, they aren't willing to take a risk and put in work that doesn't have a guaranteed outcome.

Speaker 1 And then at the end of their life, they get to fucking look at themselves in the mirror and be like, fuck, I didn't do shit. And that's their, that's their trade-off.

Speaker 1 So they get a comfortable life and a hard pill to swallow at the end of it.

Speaker 1 Yeah, man. And by comfortable, I don't mean comfortable.
I just mean like lazy comfortable. Yeah, right, right.
Like they still going to have high amounts of discomfort.

Speaker 1 You know, that's the other thing people don't understand.

Speaker 1 It's going to be fucking hard no matter what, dude.

Speaker 1 Like it's going to be hard whether you put in all the work to become successful or whether you don't put any of the work and you fucking struggle your whole life.

Speaker 1 It's, you know, I actually am the first fucking person that said, choose your hard back in two years. I got the meme to prove it.
Now everybody says it. But it is what it is.
That's fine.

Speaker 1 Lots of shit that I said original. But yeah, dude, you choose your hard.

Speaker 1 You can either fucking choose the path of hard work and, you know, bear fruit, or you could choose the path of being lazy and it's going to be a hard life. And that's it.

Speaker 2 Yeah. I love it, man.
Guys, Andy, let's do our third and final question. Andy, we've got question number three.

Speaker 2 Hey, Andy, I'm 25

Speaker 2 and near bankruptcy. I started a business a few years ago in video production and quickly worked my way up to $250,000 a year, being the only one in the business.

Speaker 2 Over the past few months, I let my ego get the best of me and I have no money left.

Speaker 2 I'm behind on taxes, $60,000 in credit card debt, spent it all on going out and expensive purchases, and I got lazy and overweight.

Speaker 2 Lost quite a few clients and business is slow over the winter, but I am working my way back.

Speaker 2 What advice do you have for me or other entrepreneurs who have self-sabotaged after getting their first success thank you guys i hope this one makes it on the pod and i think others can relate self-sabotage how do you what do you do after that moment you realize you didn't self-sabotage bro you just didn't know how to handle any kind of good happening okay it's a it's a normal lesson that's a normal lesson of entrepreneurship the difference is most people let that bury them and then they say fuck i tried being an entrepreneur and it didn't work

Speaker 1 okay that's you're at least saying all all right, I recognize what I did.

Speaker 1 I got fat. I got lazy.
I let my ego fucking think I was the man and I spent all my money and now I'm in a fucking shitstorm.

Speaker 1 I can respect that. I respect the honesty.
And the fact that you're willing to own it says that, you know, I don't think you'll do that again. Right.
And that's a valuable lesson.

Speaker 1 So let's go back to the question that I, we asked question number one.

Speaker 1 How valuable is that lesson for you to be $60,000 in debt instead of 60 million in debt 10 years from now? Right. Okay.
So you're learning a very valuable lesson that is going to be relatively cheap.

Speaker 1 And I know it doesn't feel that way right now, but it's going to be relatively cheap for you to learn versus what it would cost you in five, 10, 15 years.

Speaker 1 So first off, I'd be thankful that you're an idiot and that you're an idiot now and not later. Okay.
Secondly, I would take out a piece of paper and I would write the lesson.

Speaker 1 Right there on the piece of paper in a big ass fucking Sharpie marker and I'd take that motherfucker on your bathroom mirror and everywhere you need to see it because if you have the tendency to do this you you're going to have the tendency to do it again okay because you are playing the entrepreneur game for the wrong reasons and you need to adjust those reasons and what i mean by that is this you are playing to

Speaker 1 to fund a lifestyle

Speaker 1 and you need to be playing to create impact and value in your customer base.

Speaker 1 And if you create impact and value in your customer base, you will make so much money that your lifestyle won't be a problem. So let's take the motion.

Speaker 1 Let's be honest about your motivation because you didn't make much money, bro. I mean, I know that you think you made a lot of money.
You think you made it? You didn't. Right, right.
Okay.

Speaker 1 And then you figured out a way to fucking spend it.

Speaker 1 You need to understand

Speaker 1 that if you really want to have a great lifestyle, you got to take the focus off of yourself and you got to put it on your people. You got to put it on your company.

Speaker 1 And the rest of that shit will take care of itself. Okay.
So let's make that adjustment right now. Let's make a conscious,

Speaker 1 you know,

Speaker 1 point

Speaker 1 to not make this mistake again. And let's start digging it out.
And you say, okay, well, what do I do to dig out? Well, fuck, bro. You got to start chipping away.

Speaker 1 You know, there's no, there's no magic success fairies could fly down and give you a check for 100 grand to get you out of your hole. That's it.
You're going to have to go.

Speaker 1 You're going to have to do the work.

Speaker 1 I would recommend getting on the Live Hard program, starting 75 hard, getting your fat ass back in shape, getting your mental sharp, sharp, and everything else will follow that.

Speaker 2 Let me ask you this, Andy, because

Speaker 2 I've heard this before. I don't think you've ever really talked about this, but what is the right way to win? Meaning, like, how do you celebrate the win like the right way?

Speaker 2 Like, winners know how to win, right? Like, act like you've been here before. My coach used to tell me that all the time: act like you've been here before, right?

Speaker 2 What's the appropriate way to do it?

Speaker 1 I mean, let's be real, dude.

Speaker 1 Do you see fucking Jeff Bezos or Elon Musk or fucking any, do you see me or fucking anybody in the club popping bottles and acting like they're fucking first time they ever got a fucking dollar right did you do you see that no not at all right because it ain't and I don't know anybody that's successful that acts like a like some of these fuckers online like you know like the shit they do fucking it's embarrassing and it makes them look like amateurs so yeah um

Speaker 1 you know Be classy, be cool, reward yourself, you know, but realize that, you know, people aren't,

Speaker 1 the people that don't like you aren't going to like you no matter what you you do, so you gotta do what you like, you know what I'm saying? Like,

Speaker 1 there's a lot of people that fucking don't like me because I drive fucking cool ass shit and I fucking post on the internet. But you know why I do that?

Speaker 1 Because there's a lot of people that are young Andy's out there that are gonna think that shit's awesome and be aspiring to fucking kick ass because they're like, fuck, okay, if I go kick ass, I could drive a cool car, I could drive a bunch of them, I could drive a different one every day of the month, you know what I'm saying?

Speaker 1 Like, I can live on a fucking historic, you know, like it's inspiring, bro. And,

Speaker 1 you know, there's a difference between inspiring and just being a fucking jackass.

Speaker 1 You know, like these dudes on the internet throwing money in the air and shit. You know, it's not like it's a fine line.
Like, it's a pretty good one. Yeah.
It's just fucking, don't be a douchebag.

Speaker 1 Yeah. That's what it comes down to.
I love it, man. Yeah.
I look, dude, this guy here, you got a long way before you should be buying any cars,

Speaker 1 spending money on vacations or clubs. Like, dude, I see, man.

Speaker 1 No, that's, bro, they need to.

Speaker 1 The internet's a really, really fucking hard place because it causes people who are doing pretty good to do really dumb shit

Speaker 1 that keeps them from doing better. Like, you know, like, you know, like buying an exotic car too early.
I got to get a watch. Oh, you have the watch.
Yes.

Speaker 1 Or traveling private when it's fucking a hundred times more expensive too early. Uh, just so you could take a picture for the Instagram.
Like, dude, that shit will bury your fucking ass.

Speaker 1 You know what I mean? And the truth of the matter is, is like, you know,

Speaker 1 if I, you know, I don't know. I just, I just, I just think you should live below your means for as long as you fucking possibly can.
And that's it. I love it, man.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 I love it. Guys.

Speaker 1 Forever. Yeah.
Like, bro, like these people that you see living in a $20 million house and having fucking, you know, $30 million a car, you don't realize how much money those motherfuckers have made.

Speaker 1 They're living within their means.

Speaker 1 You just don't get it. Well below it.
Yeah. you have never conceptualized the amount of money that you can make if you went out and built something real.

Speaker 1 And because of that, you think that other people that are wealthy are spending all their money on lifestyle and shit when they're not. They're spending a small percentage on it.

Speaker 1 And then they're using their money to create more money, which pays for their life. You see what I'm saying?

Speaker 1 And it's unfortunate. You know,

Speaker 1 I'm pretty thankful that, you know, I built most of my base and the foundation of of of of my success personally before social media really took off

Speaker 1 uh and then i was able to leverage those skill sets into digital but

Speaker 1 one thing that i had that that these other guys don't have is i didn't have

Speaker 1 you know 200 fucking knuckleheads in my in my face every day with lamborghinis and fucking flashy watches and shit like distracting me like i didn't have that like i i was, I had Tony Robbins' books.

Speaker 2 Yeah, I think that's a perfect word to distraction.

Speaker 1 Yeah, like, I never felt like, I never felt like, oh, fuck, I need to buy this watch because he has this watch, or I need to go out and, you know, sacrifice the growth of my company because I need this car.

Speaker 1 Like, that was never, that was never a thing for me because the internet wasn't what it is today. And now we have a lot of people who, you know, they compare themselves to these motherfuckers online.

Speaker 1 And as you guys are seeing, more and more and more of these guys are getting caught up up in lawsuits and federal cases and indictments. And it's just showing you like this isn't real.

Speaker 1 They're not real. Like if they haven't built a real company, if they don't have employees and they haven't built multiple companies and you can't order their products and,

Speaker 1 you know, you can't see what they built, you can't experience their company. Like, motherfucker, you shouldn't be fucking paying them for business advice.
You just shouldn't.

Speaker 1 Like, why the fuck would you do that? You see what I'm saying?

Speaker 1 And we have a lot of people who don't know any better, and it's sad. And this is part of the reason why I'm starting an MFCO project again.

Speaker 1 Because for the last four years, and by the way, we're keeping this show going, it's going to be on an app. But for the last four years, we focused on dude cultural awareness.

Speaker 1 Like, hey, if we fucking lose here, there ain't going to be an opportunity for any fertile soil.

Speaker 1 Well, now we're going to get our fertile soil back, and people, young people, are going to have to learn how to really win.

Speaker 1 So, I want to turn my focus back because I have built a number of very real things

Speaker 1 to training these younger people how to actually build things and actually win, not just this hocus pocus fucking bullshit.

Speaker 1 You know, because dude, for us to keep this country,

Speaker 1 it's very, you know, we talk about this all the time, dude. You got to have the soil and then you got to plant the seeds and harvest out of it.

Speaker 1 And we were about to have soil that would never allow us to plant seeds and harvest out of it. And now we are going to have that.
And you guys need to learn how to plant and fucking harvest.

Speaker 1 And so that's what I'm going to do and and i was called to do it uh i felt called to do it again because i see so much fucking garbage out there of people being misled and taken advantage of and taught things that aren't real by people who've never done anything because they they you know it's because of what they see on the internet like bro

Speaker 1 it's not it it's it

Speaker 1 no it's not it man

Speaker 1 well fuck would you rather would you rather look like you have money or would you rather have money i'd rather have the money No shit, bro. Yeah, obviously.

Speaker 1 And that's that's the problem with Instagram right now.

Speaker 1 So, well, guys, maybe

Speaker 2 it's a hell of a way to start a Monday. Yeah.

Speaker 1 All right, guys. We'll see you tomorrow on CTI.
Don't forget, don't be a hoe. Show the show.