Pants On Panton Panting // Portapotty Popcorn Bucket/Urn [62]

Hello and welcome to another episode of the Regulation Podcast.

This is number 62.

My name is Jeff Ramsey.

With me, as always,

what?

Eric Badour, Nick Schwartz, Andrew Panton, Gavin Free.

Oh,

didn't want me to be first.

That's fine.

I understand.

It's okay.

No, I just got a little tongue-tied.

I'm still, I didn't get tongue-tied.

I got tongue-tired.

I'm still, uh,

this is five minutes since the last recording we did, where I'm still exhausted from my uh kerfuffle.

The man just saw an exotic bird.

He needs needs to gather himself.

Give him a breath.

Yeah, I'm so flummoxed from the bird.

Did you just look at the photo and go, enhance?

Enhanced.

We got to

break this down.

Do you feel like your brain gets tired before your body?

I feel like my ability to speak breaks down before my ability to run.

Oh, yeah, for sure.

Yeah, it didn't used to be the case, but yeah, for sure.

Are you running a lot?

That's a good point.

I mean,

not not in this weather next time you start feeling a little sleepy maybe like brain tired just get up

just run as fast as you can and then see if maybe it'll wake you up maybe it'll kind of equilibrium a little bit yeah then try to have a conversation see how smoke is saying

run as far as you can to meg now i just can't speak but also i'm panting

I wish I could do stuff in my brain because I find that my eyes get tired first.

That like i want to do things but then my eyes get tired and so i have to close my eyes but i'm not sleepy but i don't want to open my eyes because my eyes are tired do you ever think about how when you pant Andrew you're panting panting?

No.

Maybe you will next time.

Yeah, close your eyes and see if you can picture it.

I'm picturing it, but that involves me.

I'm thinking of pants.

What if you were panting with your pants on?

Yeah.

That's never happening.

Pants on, panting, panting.

That was honestly the biggest issue I was thinking about when we're talking about jumping out of the plane and it being cold.

Was that

I'm not putting pants on for that?

You're gonna have to find a short solution.

You're gonna, you're even with like maybe new technology that would keep you warm at 33,000 feet or whatever, you're still a shorts guy.

I think it would have to be a long sock situation because I'm okay with long socks, but I just don't want the pants.

Would you wear pants at my funeral?

No.

What if it was just one request?

He's dead.

Like, I don't.

It's a request.

I have to.

Do you think if you get married someday, you'll wear pants at your wedding?

No.

Do you, when you go to the doctor, do you wear pants?

No.

I feel like the doctor is a pants-on situation.

I don't know why.

It's always hot in Austin.

But I will put on a pair of pants to go to the doctor.

Nah, shorts.

Yeah, you gotta get comfy.

I don't understand the doctor thing.

I don't wear it.

I don't know.

Whenever I go anything that this seems important or official, I feel like I need to, I can't look like I'm wearing swim trunks.

I don't know.

Oh, those are fancy.

Eric is posting Pharrell in shorts.

Those are some fancy shorts.

The one that I always think of is LeBron.

When uh, when I film promos for this, uh, for AAPW, the wrestling company, when it's too hot, I'm wearing shorts, but then I put on a suit jacket, like where the upper half or whatever, and I walk around.

I just tell everyone I'm LeBron.

Now, the interesting thing about LeBron there is that those are actually full-size pants.

Do you wear hoodies, Andrew?

No, I guess not.

So you wear t-shirts?

T-shirts, yeah.

T-shirts, shorts.

Okay.

So do you have a jacket sometimes?

I don't know if I own a jacket right now.

This is how it's going to be at Gavin's funeral.

Gavin, your funeral is going to be Andrew.

Shaped dressed like that.

Okay.

Let's, you know what?

How would you like me to be dressed at your funeral, Gavin?

Oh, however you want.

I mean, you won't go, though.

Well, no, I would go.

Oh,

where is it?

Why did he say it?

He said it.

No, no, no.

You know what?

No, no, no.

Let me reverse.

Yeah.

Where is it?

Here?

Where is it?

I'm there.

I'm there.

Where does everybody want to have their funeral?

Oh, that's a good question.

33,000 feet in the air, and everyone has to jump out.

Okay, there you go.

That's how we spread your ashes.

Yeah, exactly.

Yeah, that's fine.

How many ashes do you become?

Like, how many ash pieces?

Ooh.

But I mean, like, how many pounds of ash do you become?

Well, it's

going to nuts.

Pounds of ashes.

Which one?

Fat boy.

Four and six pounds.

So would that be like a million pieces?

Like, I wonder who's been spread the most.

That's a good question.

Like, if you could have one little ash nug of your favorite celebrity, would you have it?

it no

no no not a chance would you I don't think so

but

having an ash nug is below buying bathwater I feel like you wouldn't want like a little it'd be a little ash nug on a piece of tape in a frame

Is it numbered?

Is it like hard?

Is it like one out of...

If you could tell me what part of the celebrity it was, like you got a little piece of his right hand, maybe.

I don't want to know where the ash was a part of.

Okay.

And like if it was the reason they were famous.

Oh, interesting.

Like if you could have Howard Stern's throat.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Like having Howard Stern's elbow means nothing to me.

But having a little bit of Howard Stern's throat.

Yeah, sure.

This is psychotic.

I'm just imagining.

Ugh.

No, I don't like any of the ideas of what I would associate Howard Stern with as far as what he's famous for.

I assume you're not meant to mail people.

Like ash people.

Ash people?

Well, it's just like you're not meant to.

I assume you can't just stick an urn in the mail, can you?

No, you definitely can't.

No.

You can't?

Yeah, you can mail ashes.

Oh.

You definitely can.

You can't just fucking

get like an envelope and pour them just in it loose.

Like, that's what I was thinking.

Like,

surely, if you pour, if you just put one ash nug in an envelope, they it's not,

I don't think they'd mind.

I don't know how

you

cremated remains must be shipped using Priority Mail Express or Priority Mail Express International.

No other service is permitted.

Surprising.

That's how I send Andrew his paychecks every month.

It's priority

international.

So if I want to do, I could sprinkle some gavin or somebody in there and it'd be totally fine.

Well, that's what I was thinking.

Maybe you've already mailed someone that you just didn't know.

Like if they were just caught on the wind when you were sealing up an envelope.

Caught on the wind.

Well, if people are scattering stuff into the air,

that had a piece of person land on you at some point.

Then that means you probably have breathed a person at some point.

Yeah, it's just, well, just carbon.

Have I ever breathed a person?

I don't think I have.

You wouldn't know.

No, but I'm trying to think of scenarios.

Maybe.

You're trying to think of if you've been Lebowskied.

I definitely would know if I've been Lebowskied, but I'm just trying to think of like, I feel like when you get ashes, they're pretty secure.

And I've never been around an open urn.

So the particles are everywhere.

I I told you guys that story about how my mom Lebowskied that family with my dad, right?

It sounds vaguely familiar, but the fact that I don't immediately know it makes me feel like

fucking brutal, dude.

My dad, we have my dad's ashes.

God damn.

And he loved the ocean.

He loved the beach.

And so my mom was like, I want to take and spread his ashes.

Oh, no.

I think it was the Gulf Shores, baby.

She's like, I want to take and spread his ashes off the pier.

And then you get up there and there's signs that are like, you can't do this.

You need a permit.

And it was like, we were like, oh, fuck.

And so I guess it's something that happens a lot.

We started reading about it on my phone.

They're like, yeah, it's hyper illegal.

And so you got to have like a permit or something to do it.

And my mom goes, we're not, I don't want to do that.

Let's just, let's just do it where nobody will see.

So instead of throwing him off the edge of the pier, she's like, we'll just go under the pier.

And so we go under the pier.

And my mom just walks out to the water.

She's like rolls her legs up.

She walks out into the water a little bit and she just takes the box and like throws it in the air.

And like my grandma's there and she's upset and I'm, you know, a little bummed and you know, my mom's slinging ashes.

And

as she does it, we hear a

and I look over and there's a family walking in the water towards us, like a mom and a dad.

And the dad's holding a kid in his arm and the mom is like holding another kid's hand and they see it coming and they just all huddle together and they like shield the kid.

Oh no.

And they got dusted by my dad about like maybe 15 feet to the right of us.

And we just booked it out of there.

Oh my god.

We just booked it the fuck out of there.

You know, he loved the water.

He loved families.

He's a big family man.

So yeah.

Oh my god.

She fly tipped your dad.

Ironically, that's probably the best thing my dad could have asked for.

Like if he thought that that was an option, he would have chosen that.

My dad was a, you know, he was a prankster.

So

he had a sense of humor.

Everything he wanted.

Has anyone been buried as ashes?

Get cremated, pour all the ashes in the coffin, and full coffin burial.

Best of both worlds?

Best of both worlds.

Probably just vampires.

Oh, man.

Yeah, that's a good call.

I just, I can't imagine an open casket where the person's been cremated ahead of time.

I think what I want, take my head off, right?

Just get all the flesh out.

Cremate the rest of me.

Put it in the skull.

I'll be interesting.

Oh, wow.

That's, wow.

I don't want your...

What about like your eye hole sockets and stuff?

Yeah, it wouldn't hold.

Do you think any...

Or you're not.

Do you think anything is going to leak out?

Well, I think

a raccoon could just come and eat those, right?

So that shouldn't be a problem.

Why would that raccoon have access to my skull?

I don't know.

It just figures like Jeff's serial killer.

Like, it would just come in, eat your brains, eat your eyes, and then like leave you for your ashes.

Why would it have access to your skull?

Because it's hanging out in your attic with all the squirrels and snakes.

Yeah, that's true.

Yeah, you're full.

It's full of squirrels and snakes now.

Yeah, I had a

snake.

I can't come back to your house.

Wait, what?

I can't come back.

I can't come back to your house.

I can't believe it happened after Jeff brought it up too.

I couldn't believe it.

You said that video, and I just went, well, you shouldn't have done that.

I swear, in a recent podcast, I said that I rarely see snakes, but I did just see one, so I'm probably not going to see one for another 10 years.

Yeah, you did.

It was like

the next day.

It was in my snake follows thing I was talking about.

Yeah.

I can't post this public because it's literally on the front of my house.

I can show you a lot.

Oh, I need nitro.

Just put it in slack.

Put it in slack.

Put it in slap.

It freaked Jeff out.

Jeff was not happy.

It was right after Jeff had talked about how he'd seen a snake.

No, I was talking about how I realized that I'm every day I'm getting closer to seeing the snake in person and that, you know, every decision I and the snake or its parents make is putting us closer to intersecting.

And I'm not jazzed about that.

Okay, so we got a snake situation.

Oh, it's climbing up.

It's big.

That is an intimidating snake.

How many feet you think that snake is?

Three feet, four feet?

Probably 10, 11 feet.

And

it crawled up the side of the house, and then I lost track of it.

It didn't lose track of you.

I don't like losing track of that.

Why?

What do you mean?

Lost track?

Just get up in that attic with the squirrels and go have a look.

And he's up there.

It probably is off to them.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Wow.

Yeah.

Or like I was telling you, it's just going home from work after a long day of snake job and it just wants to fucking chill in front of snake TV with its wife and kids in your attic where it lives in its snake community with all the other snakes that are right above your head at all times.

You think I was just hearing the snakes the whole time?

Oh, God.

Well, I think you heard the snakes eating the squirrels the whole time.

Yeah.

I got pest control coming today.

Thank you.

God.

Oh my God.

Did you let them know that it's snakes?

Oh, boy.

Well, that wasn't in my original email because it hadn't happened yet.

You should probably reply.

Probably let the guy know so he knows what he's getting into.

What about the squirrel?

Did they take care of the squirrels?

The people who haven't come yet?

Do you still have them?

That's why he has a snake now, dude.

It's coming after his squirrels.

Yeah, you send in a spider to get the fly.

Maybe he'll die.

Pretty soon there's going to be a gorilla climbing up there to eat the hyena that was there to eat the fucking steak that's there to eat the squirrels gavin's house is just slowly turning into an ark it's just there's going to be every animal is going to exist in there's going to be one of every animal's skeleton and then the largest animal will be alive i'm imagining your cremated skeleton skull thing not skeleton just a skull skeleton skull skeleton

what did i i had another one anyway i i would only be okay with it if you put these googly eyes where the eye sockets are.

I'm greatly disturbed, but then when I imagine seeing that, but those little googly sticker eyes, I would be okay with it.

Well, the skull would have to be upside down, surely.

I think you just have to seal it somehow.

Seal my

under face?

What's that underneath?

Under skull?

I don't know what that's called.

Searching for googly eyes on human skull does not produce that, but it does produce a lot of other really weird things.

I'm sure.

Oh, interesting.

So you have pest control coming for the snake, or is it unrelated?

For the squirrels.

The squirrels.

Yeah.

So they're coming today for the squirrels.

For whatever's in my ceiling.

Yeah, they're coming today for the squirrels, but they're going to be really excited when they see it's full of snakes.

Yeah.

What are you meant to do with it?

Like, could I have got that snake down?

I think it would have tried to choke me.

No, you leave the snake.

I don't think there's a snake.

It's climbing up my house.

I'm getting it off my fucking house.

I'm spraying it with a hose until it gets off.

You think the snake would have tried to choke you?

You're locking that rear naked?

Well, I assume it's a constricting snake.

I also think that it would try to choke him or eat him.

Yeah.

Like, how big does a snake?

I'm sure a four-foot snake could choke me out.

Mm-hmm.

Yeah, I don't think

it's going to choke.

I don't think that's the intent, though.

No,

I don't think that's what the snake does.

No.

It wants to bite a hole and then crawl into you like a taunton and then stay room.

It

But

it constricts me from the inside.

It just goes in and squeezes my heart.

It's like Keanu Reeves in the second Matrix movie.

No, that would be the greatest betrayal of all for Jeff.

If Gavin got replaced by a snake and we've been doing a podcast with Gavin Snake for the past however many episodes, I would be so send us a picture of your tongue.

It's like the thing, but just tongue checks.

Stick the tongue out.

The thing, but...

You're not a snake man.

Good.

Making everyone do it through like a nest camera before they're allowed in your house.

Do you remember when I bought us a bunch of tongue sleeves?

What was that for?

Oh, that's a bit barrel thing.

And I also don't know where they are.

I don't know what happened to them.

I'll have to buy more.

Are we going to eat stuff without tasting it?

I don't remember.

Oh, that was what it was.

We were going to see what it would be like if our finger buds were on our hands.

So we were going to put whatever it was inside the tongue sleeve and then that would be how maybe that would sound right now we'll throw it in the bit barrel and then the audience will tell us well maybe we could uh put garlic on our feet and lick stuff with the tongue sleeve and see if everything takes

spin around in a circle three times yeah it's good

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speaking of uh

i don't know speaking of fucking changing the subject

I promoed this at the end of last episode.

A couple weeks ago now, in real real time, maybe four or five episodes ago, we discussed what a regulation popcorn bucket would be.

And then we decided it would be funny if we made a port-a-putty.

Port-a-putty?

Port-a-potty.

My brain.

My brain's too tired.

It's more.

I could probably run really fast right now, but I can't run.

I can't talk to shit.

Hit the pavement.

We talked about making a port-a-potty popcorn bucket, which we all thought was hilarious.

And then

we talked to Natalie and we set them in motion just to see if it's feasible.

And they came back with an eight-inch, which is about the standard size, port-a-potty pop-up.

What?

Popcorn bucket.

God, dude.

Hand off the baton.

What are you doing?

And we want to see if the audience is actually interested in it.

If this is the thing that we should actually pursue, or if this is one of those ideas that's funny to talk about, but not actually make.

This thing would probably cost in the neighborhood of $30 to $35.

I've put some images up.

I've actually put the same image up twice somehow

in our Discord.

So still images.

Of the Porber puppy?

Oh, man.

Of the Porba puppy.

Is this something that you as an audience would buy genuinely?

Because we would probably have to make at least a thousand of them, which seems like a lot to make.

But the Port-a-Potty is pink.

The top comes off.

You can fill it with popcorn.

Inside the Port-a-Potty is a normal toilet.

Not a port-a-potty toilet, but a small normal toilet that opens up and can hold one popcorn kernel, like Avin requested.

On the top of the popcorn lid, or on the top of the toilet lid, would be the regulation butthole logo.

Is this something you, as a customer, as a, as a regulation listener or a comment lever?

I guess we'll never know for the regulation listeners, so it's only to the comment levers.

Will you buy this?

Should we make this?

Is this something you actually want to own, or is this a bad idea like the slop o'clock clock that we're going to have have to figure out how to get rid of 1200 of i mean it's obviously a bad idea it's just a popcorn bucket that's horrifically difficult to clean uh i would definitely get one though yeah i showed it to bernie and vanessa and they were like i'd pay 40 bucks for that tomorrow so i was like i was i was thinking like maybe not like maybe we don't do this maybe it's like it's dumb and then bernie and vanessa were like i was like what are you guys thinking they're like i want one yesterday and i was like seriously and they're like yeah i would pay i would pay good money for that tomorrow so i think it's just a cool prop like you wouldn't have to use it yeah i'm looking at it i'm thinking that that would be a great urn.

I think that's what I'm building.

Oh, popcorn bucket slash urn.

Yeah.

Should we sell it as a slash urn?

Is there some sort of tax break we can get from being an urn?

Can you sell an urn?

I don't think, I don't think typically urns are sold as also edible like things.

Well, it's whatever you want.

It's that store edible food.

You decide when you first use it, what it's going to be used.

I guess any container can be an urn.

Yeah, even a Folgers can.

I feel like that'd be such, that'd be such like a, if there was a new Elvira movie at Alamo, it'd be an urn popcorn bucket.

That's really,

I didn't think about putting ashes in it, but I guess you could.

And then you could just put the top on and never take it off or take it off and talk with your loved one.

I'm not really sure.

I was thinking about like the worst

chase thing would be like one Gerpal Gerpler was filled with ash, with ashes, like a popcorn bucket where there's one and Gavin's philosophy, or like his, his great

ash kernel, or whatever, there's one in the toilet.

Got to check your toilet to see if you got a singular ash piece.

There's just like a little piece of bone that didn't quite get burned.

Oh, horrible.

Nasty.

Well, let us know in the comments if this is something that seems like something you would want.

I actually have something I wanted to bring up.

And

this was pitched to me by our friend Alyssa.

And I've been kind of sitting on it, but I think it's a good idea and it's something I want to explore.

I just don't know how to explore it.

I feel like we're sometimes an outdoors podcast, especially when Jeff is on a bike, seeing a snake, being afraid of a snake.

But you have to do that when you're out in public, right?

You got to be in these public areas.

And sometimes it gets, sometimes you get too tired.

Sometimes you get too hot.

Sometimes you just need to have a seat.

What was pitched to me, and I think we should do, is we should do commemorative benches.

We should get commemorative benches around the United States.

So that way everyone knows, have a regulation seat in the park and just kind of hang out.

There's a bunch of different kinds.

I think we have to talk to different cities, but imagine that the second picture that I sent is a dog and he's hanging out on a memorial bench with a bunch of memorial things on it.

That's it.

Some of these are just bench sponsorships and not dedicated to people who died, which I'm sure a lot of people think that's what it is normally god so uh just a regulation bench i think it's great i think we should try and and put 50 regulation benches down in america one in each state and uh the challenge is to sit on each one i think we got to have a regulation bench in every state and we have to physically sit on it and do a podcast from it could the first one be a deputy well that that's sort of where my mind is going with this right right but i just don't know i don't know if deputy has any parks or benches or

that's a struggle for sure.

I'm a removed deputy.

What if, because there's, there's one bench in this photo that you're listing that has multiple things on it.

If we lock down a bench and then whoever wins face-off gets to put a thing on that bench.

And it's like the Stanley Cup where like the team gets engraved onto the thing, but the prize every season is you get to add an engravement of your choice to the bench.

So like our trophy, our trophy each year is just a plaque on the bench that people can't sit on and and every year we'll put a new plaque on for the winners yes the winner gets to pick what the plaque is for that bench and we just keep adding as we do seasons i also think we can absolutely do the bench and deputy i think we go to home depot when we buy a bench we put the plaque on ourselves and we just drop it somewhere in deputy indiana we do the podcast then we leave it and we see if it stays uh i like everything about everybody's idea and i think this is perfect because i we pitched an idea a while back called hide and Speak, where we do podcasts in public where people can't see us.

Remember?

Talked about kind of like what we did with the Halo video, with

Gavin's Halo video, where he showed us where he would hide and hit on girls

while all of you guys were playing Halo.

It's one girl.

It's kind of like that.

It's an old idea.

It's on the sheets idea.

But anyway, I love this idea because I've been wanting to do podcasts outside anyway.

And

I love the idea of commemorating.

I like to sit.

I'm a big sitter.

I think this is awesome.

That is not a comfortable bench.

That one.

No, but it does say class of 1973: quote, don't stop thinking about tomorrow, Fleetwood Mac.

So we can get whatever we want on a bench, apparently.

Do you guys want to hear a somber bench dedication story?

I guess.

If it's too dark, we can cut it from the episode.

Okay.

Couple years ago,

couple years ago in Austin,

at Millie's pediatrician office, God.

A guy came in.

You know what?

Listen, I'm not going to tell this story.

Yeah, we should cut that part out.

As soon as you started saying it, I went, Yeah, we shouldn't include this.

Yeah, never mind.

I'm not going to tell this story.

Why don't we put it on Patreon if you want to be bummed out?

All right.

Okay.

This is

you can weave out the beginning part, maybe.

I feel like it's integral.

It is kind of integral.

So,

a guy who was

mentally ill ill went into a pediatrician's office in Austin and took them hostage, the doctors that worked there, an all-woman pediatrician's office.

And then he ended up killing one of them and then committing suicide.

It was Millie's pediatrician's office, but not her pediatrician.

Anyway, it was a big deal in Austin.

It was heartbreaking.

It was really sad.

It was terrible in every way.

And then Emily and I were in San Francisco.

for something.

I don't even remember what.

This was like two years later.

And we went to a park and we sat down at a bench to look at the view.

and the bench was dedicated to the doctor who got killed that's great in Austin because her wish was

no her brother lived in San Francisco and wanted to do something to commemorate her so he bought the bench and commemorated her for her and it was just wild that two years later we sat on a random bench on the other side of the country that happened to be dedicated to this person I don't think I've ever been as out on a story in the first half and then as in in the second half, Jeff, that was impressive.

When you started that, I was like, I don't, in what world is this a good story to share?

And you really pull me in.

That's a crazy coincidence.

Yeah, it was just like, just one of those things where you're like, how is that possible that we sat on this particular bench out of all the benches,

even in this park, let alone in the city of San Francisco?

Yeah, that's crazy.

That's wild.

Yeah.

I

have had an interesting life change with Pillow Mountain.

I've expanded.

We've got a whole new layer of Pillow Mountain.

You got nine pillows now?

No, it's not about height.

Oh.

It's a whole new layer.

Did you get king-size pillows or something?

Are you going wider?

No, I have.

I already have a few of those, but no, it's what I'm doing is I'm burrowing into the mountain now.

We got a whole new game.

What do you think?

Because I got...

So I used to be someone who didn't like sleeping with like a blanket or like anything over their face.

The air would get hot.

It was unpleasant.

You don't put the blanket over your face.

Who sleeps with a blanket over their face?

Well, just, you know, like if you're, you're laying under the blankets and it's like a blanket fort or situation or what i just didn't like i'm not like wrapping a blanket around my face and then trying to sleep but like if you're underneath

yeah that would yeah why would you think that you must be insane gavin

anyway

i realized that with my cpap machine it's really just like a breathing thing And I'm not getting air from my nose directly.

It's exterior air.

So I've been burrowing in because I like the weight of the thing on top of me.

And I'm not dealing with the hot air because the air is coming from somewhere else i'm getting external air i feel like i'm i'm like above ground scuba diving like non-water scuba diving with this thing on it's great i've been burrowing where does all the carbon monoxide you expel go in a in a cpap i've never thought about that does it take it out to you or do they're vents okay yeah there's like a vent in the front are you just creating under your under your blankets a situation that gavin is dealing with with his cats in his office i don't think so Well, yeah, you would be increasing the carbon dioxide in the trapped air area, but you're still getting regular cars through the nose.

Yeah.

Yeah, I'm getting.

I mean, we're cranking the pressure.

It's jetting.

You said carbon monoxide?

Who?

What?

Did Jeff say carbon monoxide?

Oh, yeah, I did.

He's sleeping in his car with the garage closed with the C-Pap on, burrowed under all of this.

No, no, no.

That's next week.

That's next week.

I was like, how's your body doing that?

I just feel like it's unlocked a whole new layer of sleeping for me.

I can sleep in any position now.

It's great.

I go on little adventures, get the pillows stacked, burrow in.

I've done it too.

I've done some like under

the pillow sleeping, but I do feel like if my face is too close to a pillow, the vent starts to create sound against the pillow.

It starts to be...

Yeah, that can be a problem.

Might just rewind it here for a second.

What kind of little adventures are you going on?

I'm just different layers of the different pillows.

Sometimes we're going underneath a like a throw, like a little blanket type situation.

I just feel like I'm adventuring.

What

I just feel like I'm exploring a little bit.

I just feel like I'm sleeping in new ways and it's exciting.

So sometimes you like cramming your head between four and five and you're like, well, this is new.

Yeah.

Or like different weights.

I like feeling trapped in a safe place.

I gotta say, everything he said, I kind of know what he means.

I kind of like being at like the bottom.

I don't know if I can handle the bottom of Pillow Mountain.

That seems like a lot to deal with, but like three or four pillows up, put my head in.

I quite like weight on my eyes.

Like I tried a weighted sleeping mask, but it was,

it wasn't very good.

I didn't like it.

You're basically deep sea diving in your bed.

I am.

That's how I feel like I'm adventuring.

Yeah.

You're like Jacques Cousteau.

I feel like if I had, I feel like I would genuinely be able to sleep.

If you put eight pillows stacked high on my face while I was papping, like they're just pillows on my head, and then someone sat on the top of the pillows, I think I could sleep like that.

So you would like to be the pee in the princess and the pee situation.

Yes.

Yeah, I would be the bowling ball

at the bottom of the mattresses.

It's really, it's comfy.

I don't know.

It's it's like.

I do, I feel like I've never scubaed before.

I feel like I can scuba now.

I feel like I've learned through this.

I've scuba confidence because of the CPAP.

I actually prefer CPAP sleep without than like no CPAP sleep.

There's something fun about it.

I know people don't enjoy having to be like hooked up to the machine typically.

I actually like it.

Well, isn't that the point?

Is that you're supposed to like it because you sleep well funnily?

No, no, but like people that use it are like, oh, this sucks having to have like this machine attached to my face while I sleep.

I actually kind of like it.

I feel like I'm going on an adventure.

Is that just because you have so few real life adventures?

Oh, I just...

Just a minute.

I don't know.

I'm just happy about it.

Why you got to yuck his yum, man?

How did I?

Gavin.

Gavin, I'm with you.

Andrew, I'm with you.

I appreciate it.

And it all comes down to Nick.

Andrew, let's adventure.

In his bed?

Wait, okay.

So wait, hang on.

So

Nick wants to adventure with Andrew?

I mean, I'll help him out, whatever.

I don't know if Nick's been paying any attention to what

he's doing.

Nick's apparently in the other room right now having a conversation with him.

Nick could use a hose without going directly into his mouth, I think.

Nick needs a CPAP when he's awake.

Yeah.

Oh, Christ.

Nick can throw.

I love having spending more time with Nick.

You'll just

chime in, and I don't know which side he's on ever.

What?

Nick.

I never expected going into face with you guys that Nick would be the wild card.

But he kind of is.

It's like that.

It's like that all the time, too.

100% is the same way where he just agreeing with you, but the way he says it makes it seem like he's disagreeing with you.

And then you're like, are we in a fight?

Like, what is it?

And he just keeps going, yeah.

Yeah.

No,

look,

what?

No.

Yeah.

It's crazy.

right.

I saw,

I think I talked about this with the guys the other day.

I saw a post on Reddit that was like on the front page that was like, what legendary YouTube channel stopped making videos?

And I wanted to see where Rooster Teeth ranked.

So I went in and scrolled down and scrolled down and scrolled down.

And then I finally saw someone said achievement hunter.

So I replied and just said LOL.

But then I was reading some of the comments and people were like really going to bat for us.

Like check out Regulation Podcast.

This is really awesome.

They're like, oh, they're still doing this stuff.

It's so much fun.

All these video game videos, whatever.

And then it's like, like, oh, I like them all, but I hate Eric.

Blah, blah, blah.

Oh, when Andrew does this, I don't like it.

Blah, blah, blah.

There was one guy that's like, Yeah, I like the show, but I can't stand Nick.

And it's like,

just went like, oh, right.

You don't need to worry about what people on the internet are saying.

That is the craziest take.

That blew me away.

I can't stand Nick.

What the fuck are you talking about?

Wild, wild, crazy.

Nick said the craziest thing I think I've ever heard him say yesterday yesterday when we were recording a gameplay.

Yeah.

Gavin burped and

do you remember what he said, Gavin?

He said, he said, oh, that sounded like a tasty one.

You know, we weren't recording.

We were just

getting ready to like set things up.

And that was his genuine reaction to Gavin's burp.

And it just, like,

it was so crazy, it passed by without notice for a minute

you know the kind of burp where you can taste what you had for lunch but that's never good that's so gross it's it's gross if you have a good lunch

some foods is good

yeah there are some great foods that's right thank you You're right, though, about Nick being the wild card because Michael brought this up where he's like, oh, you're playing video games with like Jeff.

It's like, oh, Jeff will like throw a grenade.

And then he's like, run, run, run.

I'm like, yeah, that doesn't really happen with what we're doing.

Mostly it's Nick listening to Gavin.

And that's like ultimately our problem.

And so, when you hear about this burp,

what

and you just go, Yeah, I mean, Gavin's like egging him on, but it's not like it takes even like a push, it's just like a kernel of an idea, like he's incepting Nick while he's awake.

But the inception is just going, Hey, what about this?

Somehow, somehow it's going seven layers deep and brewing into an idea, it's like working.

Do you guys?

Do you guys know?

Do you guys ever see those articles online or like on Reddit or whatever or TikTok where they're like, what's something that you could do in 2000 that just doesn't exist or you can't do or the world doesn't work that way in 2025?

You know what I'm talking about?

You ever see those?

No, but I know what you mean.

I see them a lot.

And they're like, it's like, it's like, it's like, oh, you used to be able to walk up to the fucking gate at an airplane before 9-11.

Sure.

Like those kinds of things.

I was at the grocery store with Emily the the other day at H-E-B, and we were leaving.

And I realized that

we had the shopping cart.

We were taking it out, and it did that thing where it locked, and we couldn't go any further.

And a guy had to go, oh, I'm sorry.

And he had to like press a device at our shopping cart to unrelease it so we could go outside with it.

Because I guess they have shopping cart theft they have to deal with.

And that got me thinking, you couldn't launch Jackass in 2025.

So much of the beginning of that series was shopping cart related.

You just can't steal and use shopping carts in 2025 anymore.

They have the protective devices on them, so they don't go outside of the parking lot.

You'd have to jailbreak your carts first.

You'd have to jailbreak your shopping cart so that you could run it into a shrub.

If the jackass guy started today, they would have a much harder time than they did way back in whenever it started.

That was my realization.

Wow.

I couldn't think of a more lower stakes heist than finding a way to steal a row of shopping, like a bunch of shopping carts.

Starts out low stakes, but they made hundreds of millions of dollars off that.

Like, I don't mean individual theft of them.

I'm imagining someone being like, okay, we're going to hit H-E-B where it hurts.

We're stealing all of them.

Stealing all our carts.

I think if you stole a line of like 40 shopping carts, that would be the loudest possible thing to steal.

That'd be pretty awful.

That would be pretty good.

Like, when I worked at Target was like my first job and I pushed carts and they had like, it was just line them all up as many as you could and then push them to like the front of the store again like from the parking lot it was I well just looking back on it it was so loud I never thought about it it's so loud just being 16 years old pushing three carts as hard as you can

just like

like just like a sensory overload for eight hours a day I'd never thought about that yeah it's loud as shit Speaking of carts and gaming, the thing

I need to talk about, I've been excited about this for a while.

They announced a Garfield Kart 2 and it is fucked.

And like the way that only Garfield Kart could be, first of all, they didn't announce it via a trailer or announcement.

There's just a Steam page now for Garfield Kart 2 and there's no other material on it.

It just is like, hey, this is going to be a thing that happens.

The other issue is that this is Garfield Kart 3.

I don't know what they're doing because there was Garfield Kart and then there was Garfield Kart Furious Racing and now there's Garfield Kart 2.

So I don't know if they're disregarding the first one or Furious Racing is I like it's they've named their third one two

for no reason.

I'm very worried.

I'm very worried about the quality of this game.

It's a different dev team.

The quality?

Maybe it's a prequel to Furious Racing.

It could be, but it's a different dev team.

And their last game was Smurfs Racing, which did not have online multiplayer.

So I'm worried.

I'm worried that there won't be any online multiplayer in this thing.

It does have a leaderboard, apparently, Smurfs Racing, but

there could be more Garfield Kart in our life.

Garfield Kart 2 slash 3.

Has much been shown from Garfield Kart 2 slash 3?

No, not that I've seen.

Like, it's just a Steam page.

I don't think there's a trailer out for it.

At least last time I looked.

I just, I got really excited because all these people were tagging me that Garfield Kart 2 is coming.

And then I looked at it and it's like, it's just a Steam page.

Like it's not even an announcement.

Like they just made a store page for a thing.

I don't think they've even officially commented on it.

What if it's just some guy made a page for it?

No, it looks like a real game and it has like the everything's credentialed the right way, but it just is not.

It's not looking good for Garfield Kart.

As somebody who's a believer, you know,

people swear by Sonic Racing.

Obviously, Mario Kart, leader in the space, but Garfield Kart 2, Furious Race.

They really figured out some things in that racer.

And

I've been awaiting.

Oh, yeah.

Eric just posted the box art.

It looks like shit.

Oh, you can drift.

The proportions on Garfield are not right.

No.

His head to bottom has a little teeth.

He's got mean teeth.

He has mean teeth.

Normal's wearing a little hat.

Here's, for reference, here's

the quality.

That's a good-looking Garfield right there.

Yeah, that's a great Garfield.

Furious Racing, great game.

Yeah, do you think it'll come out on Switch 2?

I think everything's coming out on Switch 2 that can.

Oh, cool.

I can't believe Cyberpunk's on Switch 2.

How does that run?

Ah, wild.

Not just that it's on Switch 2.

It's all on the cartridge, which is insane.

Yeah.

It's really impressive.

I had another racing video game related thing.

I'm going to share my screen.

I got an achievement in a unique way in Roadcraft.

We filmed a few videos in Roadcraft.

And it's so good.

It's great.

It's a great game.

It's the best game I've ever played.

Gavin got that achievement that I got that I'm going to show in a video that we filmed.

I don't even know how I got it, but I checked when I had it.

Is it the falling one?

It's the falling one.

So this is a clip of me and I talked to Nick.

So I think we're recording this.

Are you on Sunken here?

I am on Sunken here.

I'm trying to clean up a road so i filled up literally as many blocks as i can

pieces of cement and i had just spent a lot of time looking at my map i'm going to hit this clip so we're starting i'm like okay i'm ready to go let's go oh no i filled it up and i'm tipping that sucks

and then this happens

yeah

oh yeah yeah that happened to my friend i think one time yeah i've that I've seen that a few hundred times in Snowrunner.

Oh, yeah.

That's a Snowrunner thing.

This is a carryover.

I've never experienced this before.

Oh yeah.

You're like a tornado.

I am destroying all of the trees in the area.

I'm flipping around.

I'm flying for people that are just listening.

My truck is spinning like a tornado rapidly in all directions.

But unlike Snowrunner, there's no vehicle health, so I'm not taking damage.

You are what happened to that town.

I'll show you where I end up.

You're the natural disaster.

That's where I end up.

Oh, my God.

Upside down on the roof.

Upside down on the roof.

On a roof.

Wow.

Just bouncing around.

I'm stuck.

I'm struggling.

He's trying to get out.

I'm trying to use my crane to get me off of this building.

Yeah, the problem you have here, too, is to say you could just recover, but you're going to leave all that concrete on that roof.

But that's okay because I just didn't want it on the road.

I think that's eventually the conclusion I come to is I realize, oh, I can strap, but my engine is stalled, so I can't activate things the way I want.

But I think I get off of the, yeah, I released it, and then there we go.

And then I just start spinning.

It starts breaking.

It's like your boom does not move that fast.

That's crazy.

It's like it got spun around and it has to spin back all the times it's spun around.

I was like I was possessed.

But that has been some of my Roadcraft adventures recently.

It broke and I got the achievement in the process of me just flying around the map as a tornado truck.

It was a great time.

That's great.

We have filmed two videos in that game, one with three of us and one with four of us.

And just so we're clear, I personally would like to film 1,000 more videos in this game.

Yeah, it's great.

If and whenever you guys want to, I'm at 3 a.m., I'm up for filming videos in this game.

I'd never want to stop playing this game.

It's amazing.

It's so much fun.

There have been so many great games.

And then Minds Eye also came out.

What's Minds Eye?

Minds Eye was a

game.

Yeah.

It's one of the studio heads of Rockstar left and made their own studio called Build a Rocket Boy.

And Minds Eye is the first game under that umbrella.

And it looks like it's supposed to be...

an open world action game, but it's a linear action game in an open world that has nothing in it.

And it is incredibly broken in so many ways.

It's so stupid.

What's that game you guys did a video in yesterday?

I saw in the Discord.

Oh, we played The Alters, which is a really cool game in which you get stranded on a planet and you're trying to escape it, essentially, by recovering resources on the planet.

It looked so interesting.

Single player, though?

It is single-player only.

Yeah.

I thought that would be so cool, though, if it had multiplayer and you were just waiting to be born.

That would be cool.

Because there is like a summoning.

You have to make a thing called the womb and like you create iterations of you.

So yeah, you're just waiting.

Planet 2 plays the sheep.

Mind's eye is, I think, the worst game I've played this year.

And it's like very popular, worse.

Like it's gotten a lot of attention due to how bad it is.

Do you think it will get good over time?

No, that's the problem.

They're like fixing it.

They're like fixing a lot of the bugs, but it just as a core game is not great to play.

It's not a ton of fun.

What platform is it on?

It's on everything.

It's a $500 million budgeted game.

That is.

Is there a multiplayer?

They're going to add it, apparently, but I don't.

It's one of those things where I'd be surprised if they continue to support it.

And anyway.

If they add it, we got to do it.

Oh, we definitely have to do it.

I 100%.

I got all the achievements.

I needed to see everything that was in that thing.

Wait.

You 100%ed a game that you didn't.

What?

It's the worst game you played this year and you 100%ed it?

I needed to see everything that was in that thing because it is fucking, it's just insane.

It's uh,

you like, it is a completely empty, open world.

There's nothing you can do.

I played a mission where you have to drive five miles.

There's no map.

You have a mini map, and that's it.

You can't open the map.

There's no broader, like you can't see the world map in any way.

Do they just not want you to see how small the map is?

No, it's huge.

That's the problem.

It's a fucking huge map.

And if you go in a direction they don't want they'll fail the mission on you uh so i'm driving a car and the only time you get a waypoint marker is when you're in your vehicle so i'm in a vehicle and i'm driving and it gets destroyed and you can't steal random vehicles on the street uh and it's also a scenario in the game in which all the cars are gone so i had to run five miles on foot without being able to see the map and there being no enemies of any kind and it was a thing where i'd be running and then the guy would say, whoa, where are you going, buddy?

That's the wrong way.

And I'm just running towards the marker.

So then I'd have to turn around and run like four blocks.

I spent 30 minutes real time

having to run to this location to do the mission.

It is horrendously bad.

It is like impressively.

I flipped my car.

It was on fire and I tried to leave and it wouldn't let me.

And I thought, oh, it's just broken.

And then I realized there's a button to flip your car because the car weight physics are really weird so like you're constantly flipping your vehicle over and then you're pushing x to get it back up there was no way to exit your vehicle upside down so my car is in complete flames and i had to reorient it to be back on its wheels before it would let me leave the vehicle uh before it exploded it is so bad there's a boss fight where the it's like The boss gets called and is like, kill this person.

And instead of killing them for some reason, they take them to the roof and then you chase them and then you go to fight them and they're like nah actually i'm gonna step away and you're gonna fight drones instead and so you're fighting drones for no reason but you can ping and i noticed when i pinged i got a marker for where they hid the like the npc of the boss they just put him in a wall And I was looking and I like there is no door to where they could have been, but I'm still getting a marker for him.

It is a disaster.

He was, ah, I could go on and on, but it's, it's so impressively bad.

And it's weird in a way that I couldn't resist.

I had to keep playing.

You unlock free mode by beating the game, but there's nothing to do in the world.

That's nuts.

That is part of it.

It's sort of build tools.

So the idea being that like you can build all of these experiences yourself.

If you're on PC and you have the PC version of it.

But it's just, it's, it's incoherent.

They outsource the

game creation to you?

That's sort of the idea.

It has had such a bad launch.

I think the like Steam highest concurrence is under 2000.

So I just, I don't, I think they're going to drop everything for it.

And what's unfortunate is this summer they're supposed to add Agent 47 for a Hitman mission.

And I just don't think that'll happen now.

But he'll only be inside a wall.

It will only be in a wall.

It's just weird things for me of like Lizzie Maguire, the show Lizzie Maguire, the little brother from that show plays an Elon Musk character in this.

And it just looks like him.

And so it's like, I'm playing, and then I'm going, that looks like Lizzie Maguire's little brother.

And then it actually is.

Like, it's just so,

it's so bizarre.

Is he playing Lizzie Maguire's brother in the game?

He is

playing Elon Musk,

essentially, is the thing that he's going for in that game.

I can't believe you 100% of this thing.

That's crazy.

Just a heads up for the portion of our audience that does not like video games and doesn't watch our gameplay.

We are filming three drafts tomorrow.

Yes.

It's true.

It's true.

Lots of drafts on the lots of non-video game related content on the books coming up.

Just FYI.

Want to make sure the audience knows we're servicing both sides there.

Yes.

I'm excited for the drafts tomorrow.

I got to do research.

Yeah, I haven't been able to do any real work on them yet.

That's going to be by tonight.

Yeah, I'll do that tonight.

I've started bringing video game glitches into real life.

It kind of happened unintentionally, but I dropped something the other day, and my first instinct was just to T-pose in place.

Like my life had gone wrong a little bit.

And I'm just going to incorporate that more every time I drop something.

You're going to convince somebody that they're in the Matrix?

I do so much stuff that no one sees just because it makes me giggle.

Is T-posing the next?

Like, what outside of T-posing, what is something you do?

Uh, I once, this kind of really disturbed Meg.

She didn't like it at all.

But I once was just awake in the house on my own.

Meg was still asleep.

And I thought, I wonder if I can.

I was like, I wonder what it would look like if my legs kidnapped me.

me.

And I just...

What?

I lay down.

What the fuck?

Are you all right?

So I lay down on the floor as if I was asleep or like unconscious.

And then I just started walking around, but just from the knees down.

So my legs were dragging the rest of my body around the house while I was like...

completely lying down with my arms like up above my head.

And

I showed her a a video of it and she was like oh that's creepy

oh are we talking like an atoms family thing with like the hand but it's your your legs like becoming sentient just yeah so imagine imagine you're just lying down completely flat on your back okay and your arms are extended like out behind your head so they're

okay wrists down behind you and then just start walking

i like tea posing a lot more than this okay

I'm a big fan of the tea posing.

I did it like a whole lap of the kitchen, just being dragged by my

kids.

What, you guys don't do that?

You guys don't kidnap yourself?

I don't think I've ever kidnap myself.

I don't think so.

Oh, man.

Teach their own.

I had a...

Maybe you'll remember this, Jeff.

I brought this up to him and he didn't seem to remember.

You probably won't.

Maybe somebody will.

I will.

will did i ever talk about that

that i there this was a very long time ago that i thought that there was like an animal or something like i could hear stomping in like my rooftop like i i thought that maybe there was like uh i know birds moved in there at one point but i thought that maybe like a raccoon or something i thought that's how you tricked me into listening to your farts was it I thought that yeah, that was like, that was how we got like, we got like birdchirp.in np uh mp3 or whatever or birdchirp.wave

it was just, it was like clearly like a movement sound that would happen on the roof.

And I was very odd.

I'd never experienced anything like it.

And then it stopped at around the same time the people that lived in the apartment next door moved out.

So I thought, oh, maybe it was like sound because sometimes sound travels in like a weird way

here.

And they had kids that would run around.

So I thought maybe it would just, it was that.

And then recently, I talked to somebody else that lives in this building.

And I learned that it wasn't, it wasn't that.

It was a person that lives above me.

And I guess they were known in the building.

When they would have like episodes, they would hop out of their unit and land on top of mine, essentially, and just do sprints.

And that's how they would handle it.

They would just sprint across the rooftop.

So I had a person, i thought it was like an animal thing because it sounded like running but there was just the person that was doing sprints on my roof what the kind of episode is that do you

do you think that's what gavin has oh

maybe they moved to austin damn it

is it possible that your neighbor was a snake i oh

I gotta check their tongue.

But I thought about when it was happening, like getting a cheap Amazon Amazon drone and flying it up to see like if I could see anything, I would have died.

I would have had a heart attack if I saw just a person doing sprints at 2 a.m.

on my roof.

Also, a person that's in the mental state that requires them to have an episode where they run across a rooftop at 2 in the morning, you fly a drone up to that person, you are sending them into a deeper and darker down a spiral that they are, you know what I mean?

Suddenly, there's nobody who really is watching them.

And yeah, it's probably safer that you you didn't do that.

Sounds like a mission in mind's eye.

Are there drone missions in mind's eye?

I've uh, I found it, I found a video.

Oh, you found the feet?

I'm putting it in Slack.

All right, you're okay.

I'll describe

what I'm watching.

So, Gavin is on the floor in his thing, he's in the position he's talked about.

His like, he's just, yeah, it's so

I see

I totally get why she didn't like that.

Oh, no, the cats are investigating.

They're very invested.

So if you've ever played Hitman, from the waist up, he looks like when you're pulling a body in Hitman to like dump them in a garbage can or whatever.

But it's just him propelling himself forward with his legs.

taking little steps.

Can that go in the video?

Is that safe?

Yeah, let me do like a better crop on it okay okay and uh i'll get you a better version it in i i think at the time i was thinking of me myself and irene like what if one of me was unconscious but the other one wasn't and uh that's what i came up with crazy god damn have you tried doing that from the could

could you do it reversed

what does that mean push instead of pull yeah like push or pull or maybe do like your arms are trying to kidnap everything else

well i could get myself in a headlock and dragging myself around i yeah i don't know if the headlock is necessary but just the idea of like nothing but legs but arms going forward i don't know well i mean this is my version maybe you should come up with your version

i'm good

i'm good i'll copy you in the t-posing i like that okay That's funny.

I had an idea, Eric, that isn't a funny idea, but I think it might be a fun idea.

I don't know where it would fit in

our universe, but I wanted to run it by you specifically.

Sounds like a bench in San Francisco.

Sorry, continue.

I do want to have a bench in every state.

I think that's a great idea.

I was thinking the other day about how

I was reading an article of like if you were to, if you were to

draft the all-time best Yankees team from Yankees players throughout history.

So if you just made like, you constructed the best Yankees team possible from the, uh, from every person who's ever played for the Yankees, right?

And I was thinking, what if you did that for every team?

Like that would be fun to see who the best, like the all-time best, you got like shoeless Joe Jackson playing on the White Sox team next to Robin Ventura and, you know, in the Big Hurt.

And

you've got Tatisse next to Tony Gwynn or whatever on the Padres.

And

you create all 30 teams.

You can do this for other sports too, football, basketball, whatever.

But

you build out these teams that are the best possible team you could field from the history of that team.

And then you put them in a league and sim it and see who the best baseball team of all time is.

Yeah, that's a great idea.

It's not funny.

I don't know that it would make like content.

I mean, it's got to have to make some kind of content, but I just think it would be an interesting thing to do.

I think it's a great idea.

I think it's definitely like a deceptive thing, too, where it's like, who

everyone's going to have their like, oh, yeah, this guy, not that guy, because it's like their specific team.

Uh, but like, I like that idea.

I like that.

Like, I bet Nick has a lot of opinions about, you know, the Phillies, uh, where I won't.

But like, could you imagine a Spurs team that has Tim Duncan, Manu Ginobly, Victor Wimbinyama, David Robinson, Tony Parker all on it at the same time?

Like,

oh, whoa.

I wouldn't like it.

You know, I don't like the Spurs.

I would.

They have such a...

It's fucking crazy to think about.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I like that idea.

I wonder, we should round that idea into something because I think there's something there.

I like that.

Creating like the GOAT roster for

every team and then somehow simming them against each other.

I just don't know.

I don't know what we do with it.

I used to do season sims back in the old AH days.

There was a period where I fucked my hand up and I had to get surgery on it to get my tendons repaired.

And then I had to go through like six months of physical therapy.

And so I was in a cast for like three or four months in a row there.

And the only, I only had one hand I could use for gaming

because it was my, my, my left hand and my thumb that I had fucked up.

And so I was useless.

And so I just made a show called AH Presents where I just simmed sports constantly and it did okay, but I always had so much fun doing it.

And I would do that.

I'd sim like, who's better?

The 72 Milwaukee Bucks or the 86 Celtics.

Oh, I like to send it to C, you know.

We should, we should do that.

Like, maybe we'll do that at the office.

Maybe we'll put something together and see what we can do.

Cause I, I really like that idea.

Yeah, I think it'd be, I think it's be a fun and interesting idea.

Yeah, I would do the pettiest sports fan thing of all time where in NHL, I would go into B a GM mode and I'd pick teams I hated and I just dismantle them.

I would just give away all of their best assets for dog shit players.

I'd trade away their picks and then I would just sim us failing miserably.

And that is where I'd get my joy from is just tanking this franchise as an incompetent GM that got this job.

It would bring me so much joy.

You are a true sports fan.

Absolutely.

Yeah.

I spent more time doing that than doing the reverse of like.

taking over my favorite franchise and bringing them to victory.

Like that's fun.

I've done that a lot, but oh, there's a special type of joy of getting rid of a team's entire assets and also a believability of like, this is what incompetence GMs do.

I'm trading away Luka Donchich without any warning, without any team knowing.

Like, I'm just, this is, this is all believable what I'm doing, but oh, I've only experienced it as the fan who has it happen to them.

It is so much fun to be the person that is making these decisions.

You're like, I'm Nico Harrison.

I'm Matt Ishbia.

I'm going to destroy this team.

Oh, whoopsie.

Looks like I traded away everything and we suck.

Oh, no.

I'm still making all my money.

Oh, no.

Farm on a one-legged 35-year-old Kevin Durant.

Oops.

We're gonna get rid of Kevin Durant for next to nothing.

Uh, by the time this is out, it'll be pretty dated, but uh,

I think, is it Danny Ainge who runs the jazz?

Yeah, yeah, he's uh, he's the the jazz GM now, I believe.

Taking

the what they had with the draft was last night at the time of this recording.

Taking Ace Bailey when

Ace Bailey made it really clear, I don't want to go to Utah.

I don't want to play for the jazz.

Do not have me go here.

I don't want to do this.

I won't work out with you.

I don't want anything to do with you.

And then the jazz going, that's great.

Welcome to the Utah Jazz is so fucking funny.

It's hilarious.

That's incredible.

That's incredible.

The Reddit comments last night, I was watching, because I was in the car driving home during the draft.

So I was just keeping keeping up with it on Reddit on like the megathread.

And the comments were so fucking funny.

They were like, Ace Bailey, go fuck yourself.

Also, welcome to the team.

You're not a big sports guy.

Hope you like Dirty Soda asshole.

Do you have a fandom that is based in suffering?

And the way that sports is.

Like, is there anything that you enjoy that ultimately is just brings you misery?

Maybe Bond movies?

Really?

You think they're more bad Bond movies?

Like, I was trying to equate, like, what would be his equivalent of sports fandom?

Because Gavin doesn't really care about sports.

Yeah, I don't really know what anyone said for the last five minutes, but I remember always getting excited for the new Bond.

And it seems like the first Bond movie of a new actor is always great.

And then it's just a steaming pile of sliding downhill until they change actors.

You know, that's kind of how I feel about Mission Impossible movies.

I'm always really excited for them.

And then I watch it and I go,

I wasn't three.

Are you excited about Denny Bellanoux directing the next one or no?

I didn't even know.

Oh, really?

Oh, this is how you found out?

Oh, my goodness.

Yeah.

They just announced

it.

I'm not interested in stuff until I can watch or use it.

Got it.

Like, I've

never enjoyed E3.

Like, I don't like hearing about stuff that's coming out.

I just let me know when it's ready.

You don't like anticipating things?

No, I don't really watch trailers if I could help it.

Well, I get that, but like, the concept of being anti-anticipation is really funny.

It's just too much.

Like, I remember getting excited when they did that uh elder scroll six announcement and uh more time has passed since that announcement than the time gap between skyrim and that announcement holy hell yeah like i get what you're saying but there's no way it's written i just i find it fun the idea of like i don't like looking forward to things

is the statement that you're making nah but i'm i'm i'm kind of with you I'm I'm with you.

Well, there's like a, there's a nice window of it.

Like, like, for example, right now, could not be more excited about that donkey kong game i'm i've i'm so excited but it's only like a month away i don't want to hear about anything that's more than a month away really

yeah i'm i'm i'm kind of with you on that though because i i am i could not be more excited for the donkey kong game absolutely but also i don't want to keep thinking about it because i can't play it right now and i'm frustrated that i can't play it right now See, I have the reverse, like, I get what you're saying, but for me, it's like the

people that made Hitman are making that new James Bond game.

And I just read a story about how

there are rumors that that James Bond game will have like elusive target type mission type things where it's like timed missions.

And I never considered that.

I never considered any live service aspect of that game sort of like Hitman has.

And I'm so excited for that possibility.

Yeah, I just feel like being excited now doesn't do anything for me there.

You get the excitement now.

Well, it just doesn't change anything, does it?

It brings joy to my life.

That's what I get from it.

I'm happy about it.

Gavin rejects your joy.

He does.

To be honest, I did go to E3 a bunch a decade ago, and I was never excited to be there.

And I love games.

Yeah, I don't.

It's definitely...

I mean, they used to have games on the floor, though, right?

Like, there were some playable things.

I feel like.

Yeah, I don't know.

Yeah, I don't know.

Until 30 minutes into the show, and then they broke, and then there'd be a sign on, and they'd say, could you come back a little bit bit later?

We're working on fixing the build.

Interesting.

E3 sucked.

I'm with you.

I think it's a better format this way.

Like what we get now, I think, is a better

thing for E3.

It was great for a time, and it's just the time sort of passed.

And I think that's just fine.

I don't know.

It's just like the only thing I ever took away from them was all the things people would complain about.

And I just end up just leaving an event where everyone was bitching about something.

I feel like E3 died from you and Gary Coleman did.

He was such a big part of E3 every year.

I'd always see him there doing stuff.

And he wasn't anymore.

Interesting tie-in.

I like going back and re-watching E3 press conferences because you know the story of everything.

Like how it all worked out.

Yeah.

So, like, games that you forget had a huge presentation and backing for their reveal, and then being like, oh, nobody ultimately played that or cared about that.

Like Evolve.

Yes.

There was a string I recently re-watched.

I think it it was E3 2015 for Xbox.

And it was like Evolve, Scalebound, and a Fable multiplayer only game.

And it was like three games in a row that never came out.

And they were just back to back to back.

And it was so funny watching it now.

You're like, oh, none of these happen.

None of this stuff works out.

And I think just the more I learned about that industry is.

I just feel like people would work on a game, it'd be like Crunch Central, and then they'd be cramming to get something out for E3 that would end up not being in the game or like not, not, or they couldn't, physically couldn't ship that in the game.

It's just like, why are we bothering to do this?

This is just like a pointless man-made hurdle in game development.

Totally.

Good promo, though.

It is.

And it's like a thing where I think the way they do it now is so much healthier for everybody involved in that industry.

But I do, I do miss the absurdity of every company having to put on this giant event within like two hours of each other back to back to back to back.

Trying to outdo each other.

Yes.

Fighting to rent spaces and theaters around San Diego or LA to fucking have their dumb events at.

And like, hey, check it out.

Cirque de Sole is here.

Now play this video game.

Just nice having a bunch of people get together to try to identify like an exotic bird or something like that.

The fuck is this thing?

Well, now that we're back around to the exotic birds,

if this was Christopher Reeves' horse,

it'd be time for Gavin to go around back and put two between its eyes.

Put this baby to bed.

Thank you for listening to another episode of the Regulation Podcast.

Be on the lookout for some drafts in the near future and some gameplay videos.

And maybe we'll all get kidnapped by our legs and film it.

You never know.

Here on Regulation.

We'll see you next time.

Bye.