American Gavin // Andrew's Official Tom Cruise Ranking [55]

Martha listens to her favorite band all the time.

In the car,

gym,

even sleeping.

So when they finally went on tour, Martha bundled her flight and hotel on Expedia to see them live.

She saved so much, she got a seat close enough to actually see and hear them.

Sort of.

You were made to scream from the front row.

We were made to quietly save you more.

Expedia, made to travel.

Savings vary and subject to availability, flight inclusive packages are at all protected.

Hello and welcome to another episode of the Regulation Podcast.

This is episode 55.

My name is Jeff Ramsey.

With me, as always, Andrew Panton, Gavin Free, Eric Schwartz, and Eric Badour.

Hello.

Hello, boys.

Hello.

How's everyone doing?

Lovely.

Good.

I've had about three minutes to recover from that Let's Play we did.

I'm doing fine.

Gavin, how did you feel after we did Behind the Mask last episode?

A little bit gassy.

It fucked me up.

I do not turn your CPAP machine all the way up and then start talking with it on yeah i never went full full blast on it but i did uh swallow quite a lot of air there's a lot of air how long were you up for andrew uh i had a headache for a few hours after and then the next day i had some blood in my nose from i think i was blasting my nose too hard so

jesus christ dude it was like a minor nosebleed type situation it wasn't terrible but yeah I'm not doing 25.

You tortured yourself.

I'm not doing the full blast again.

That was too much.

Yeah, I just felt like I wanted to throw up because

the air leakage through my throat hole.

It's,

yeah, it's, it's, I like that you're also on the CPAP.

It gives me somebody to talk about these things.

Yeah.

Got little pap chats.

There's some unusual problems.

You wouldn't know this, Jeff, because you haven't had to deal with it, but the thing you have to put the water into, worst design product of all time.

It's dog shit.

Not even a product, just thing.

It's just absolute dog shit, however it's designed.

What makes you say that?

What's so bad about the design?

It's just so awkward to fill.

The thing, the lid to like lock it in is fidgety.

It leaks.

It's just a nightmare.

It tips over if you're not on a perfectly flat surface.

And you can't, because of how it like springs back, you can't just leave the lid open naturally.

It's a disaster.

Is there only one model like that you guys all use the same thing?

They're not different brands you could try?

There are, but I i think we're both assigned the same lineup

i think they're different models of the same brand it's like we're both on apple devices but different ones

but it's the same ecosystem yeah they both they both removed the headphone jet yeah speaking of being a little fucked up When we sat down to play it to do our Let's Play this morning, Nick and Gavin, you both mentioned not feeling at your best today.

I think I'm done with Dollar Hot Dog Night.

I think they've managed to monetize, hey, we need to throw away all this rancid food.

Let's charge everyone a dollar instead of just throwing it away.

And the buns were dog shit.

They're like crusty, stale.

The dogs were just, I didn't get a single bit of enjoyment even while I was eating them.

So last night for Eric and Blaine's birthdays, we went to a Round Rock Express Dollar Hot Dog Night game.

I was excited because it was, you know, I'm closing in on my 70, my yearly average, and I thought I could bang out a lot.

I bought four hot dogs, four dollar hot dogs last night.

I managed to get down two of them, and I just threw the other two away.

Really?

They were not great.

They were definitely, I think the dollar hot dog night on Wednesdays is because on Thursday they get new hot dogs in and they're like, we just got to burn through what we have left.

I didn't get sick or anything, but two hot dogs was definitely enough for me.

And I just, I had such high expectations and high hopes for more, and I just couldn't do it.

I had to, I woke up with a rock.

Andrew, don't, don't listen to these guys.

The hot dogs.

Really?

You're crazy.

You're an idiot.

Yeah, don't listen to these guys.

They look good.

The hot dogs were just fine.

It was like every other dollar hot dog night.

They were just fine.

They were there.

The hot dogs were fine.

They were, I was, it was just fine.

The natural's real stale.

Millie got sick on the way home.

She was like, oh, I don't know if those hot dogs were good.

She was feeling like dog shit in the car on the way home.

So three of us got instantly sick.

No, they're fine.

I felt fine, too, personally.

I don't know if I fully blame the hot dogs.

I was sat behind Nick and Nick was like, oh, the hot dogs aren't sitting great.

And then he was like, maybe this will fix it.

And he just poured a couple of beers on top.

Yeah.

And then

his kid got a milkshake and then he finished that.

Now,

Nick, you not feeling well, do you think that was just from the hot dogs?

No, no, I had an extenuating circumstance.

So what was that extenuating circumstance?

Well, it was a whole box of Nashville hot chicken from Jack in the Box earlier in the day,

which is the saltiest food in the world.

And then the two hot dogs, and then my wife ate half one, and Archie ate half his, so I ate both of theirs, which added up to one dog.

And then did the beer, and then did the milkshake.

That's so much.

I was talking to Nick throughout the night, and as more time went on, and as he was pouring more just awful shit on top of his rancid shit, shit, he started like, he started to like squint a little bit

while you're talking just so you'll get more impatient.

This is you're experiencing 100% eat Nick where he just like nothing will stop him.

He gets mad.

So we did a live stream for our anniversary like a week ago and we're like, oh, should we eat before?

I went, yeah.

And then Michael's like, surprise, I got a 30-piece nugget from Chick-fil-A.

Nick got mad.

Yeah.

That Michael brought the 30-piece nuggets, not because it was like, oh, man, what a miscommunication.

He went,

no, I have to eat all these nuggets.

No, I was mad because I asked before we went in if we should eat, and you were like, Yeah, you should probably go ahead and eat.

So I ate a meal, expecting, you know, there it's not going to be food.

So I'll, you know, but then there's food that shows up and I can't let it go to waste, but also

it's nuggets.

I got to eat them.

This is the same.

What he said and what I said is the same thing.

It's not the same thing.

I said this.

There was a miscommunication.

He said,

he and I said the same thing.

I just posted a picture of some food that absolutely should have gone to waste.

That should all have been

talking about.

I think the dogs.

How are you meant to do the mustard and ketchup?

I was going to, I need to know what's going on with this condiment situation because it is.

Yeah, there's like a plunger thing and it just, it shoots out bad.

Yeah, it's like a plunger thing.

And in one hand, I've got a drink.

So I've got drink in hand and I'm using that hand to push the plunger.

The other hand has a tray of three dogs.

Right.

And you can, you can sort of push down the plunger and slowly move the tray towards to get like a nice thing, but then the tray hits the thing.

That's why my mustard stops halfway across the dog.

And then you're trying to angle it the other way, but then you're going across three dogs, but it doesn't make any sense.

The layout is so stupid.

My wife used a fork to spread it on her hot dogs.

Yeah, I used a jalapeno.

There you go.

There you go.

You should have used the other dog, Gavin, to redistribute on the other dog.

I got no hands free.

Yeah.

It was it was a really fun night and it was for my birthday.

So I bought myself a jersey, which I've never really done before.

I got a chupacabra's jersey, which is like their alternate.

And then I got the name on the back.

Big dog.

Big dog one.

So I did that.

That was, I've never done that before and I was really thrilled to be doing it.

It's awesome.

It was a really fun game.

It was a good time.

All of these hot dog photos makes me want to share something I'm

a little embarrassed about.

Over the weekend, I went to a race.

I went to this place called

Cotton Bowl Speedway with Burndog.

It's a place that he loves, absolutely loves, and he's been trying to get us to go for like a year.

So we finally went.

And by the way, I'm going to tell you right now, Regulation is sponsoring a car.

We are going to get involved in the local racing business.

It ain't expensive.

It ain't going to be hard.

And we're going to have some fucking fun.

We sat down.

They said, on your market set, go.

And before I could look up at the cars, there was a crash.

By the time I caught up to it, there was a car doing flips in the air.

It flipped three times in the air.

Oh, my God.

We hadn't been there six minutes yet.

It was insane.

That was totally fine, by the way.

Good.

And after that, no more flippy wrecks.

I thought, whoa, is this what it's like?

Apparently, it's not.

That was just

a rarity.

But anyway, while I was there, I ate two hot dogs, which were, I must admit, much better.

Much, much better than the ones we had.

And I wanted to take photos for the hot dog group.

And this is the one I sent you guys because it was the good one.

Yeah.

That's the good one.

Remember, that's the good one.

I was trying to get the cars in the background as they were going really fast, and I wanted to get the hot dog.

This was the bad one that I didn't show you guys.

I'm actually really embarrassed about that one.

It looks like a UAP in the corner.

It's like a deleted scene of nope.

I looked at that photo and I went, oh, fuck you, me.

I unidentified myself.

Unidentified dog, dude.

What the fuck?

It's UFD, unidentified flying dog.

Dude, that's terrible.

The Cotton Bowl speedway was fun, though.

It's fucking awesome.

The next one is in June.

They're doing dwarf cars, whatever that is.

And I'm so excited.

It is so much fucking fun.

And it ain't busy.

It ain't hard to get in.

You don't stand in line for hot dogs.

You don't stand in the, you don't have to sit in the line to leave in your car.

It's uh, there was like maybe a hundred people spread across the whole thing, and there was you know, room for 500.

Have you never seen dwarf car racing?

Not in person, no.

It's uh, oh, it's those.

There was a speedway, Elkahone Speedway, where I grew up, and we'd go all the time.

And so we'd see dwarf car racing.

I really like the, like, that's fun.

But the cars that I really like, have you guys ever seen rat rods?

No,

uh, let me see it.

They are,

it's not, rat rods sounds like it's a type of car.

Rat rods is when you take pieces from different cars and make them a new kind of car.

I see.

Okay.

And so it's a cobbled to, these are like cobbled together like junk hot rods.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah.

Rat rods are like, like, this is my shit.

I really like rat rods.

I think they're awesome.

It's very Mad Maxi.

Yeah, this is like what ratfink would drive.

I feel like we could build a rat rod.

Oh, definitely.

I think we could definitely build a rat rat rod it wouldn't have to do anything or go very far because it's there baby i think its base would be a porter potty yeah absolutely they have races you can just enter in whatever car you bring when you go to uh cotton bowl so you know oh hell yeah imagine us in a wacky racist style porter potty with wheels just poking out

the top like we could build one of these cars dude we're the new we're the new anthill mob from wacky races That's awesome.

That's the car with all the little gangsters in it.

And they all sat together.

And then there was one guy who stood on the front.

That can be me.

I was about to say that that's what I like about the dwarf cars: it looks like an Al Capone vehicle, but instead of crime, he chose speed.

Yeah, hell yeah.

I just want to be the fastest guy.

Dude, that's awesome.

If we're going to do races and we're going to make this like a very like American thing, I think this is where our new American friend Brett should make it.

Brett with one T.

Brett with one T.

I turned my hat around and Eric said, I look really American.

and then I picked Brett as my American name.

Kevin is a new character?

Isn't that crazy?

Everyone was like adding little character traits to Brett's life and it turns out he's on Hinge.

And then

my wife isn't really happy about that.

No, she was not jazzed about you being on Hinge or Brett being on Hinge.

I did have to ask.

Some of the single slash younger people how Hinge or any dating site works because I've never actually used one.

Apparently you buy lots of of roses, they say.

They were filling me in about roses.

Are there any photos of Brett?

Dude, more.

I wonder if I have any other additional.

I think I have some, I think I have a couple other Brett photos, but that one, that one to me.

Oh, okay.

Here, okay.

Here's a couple more Brett photos.

But him drinking the beer is like what really sold me.

But there's something about him.

It's white t-shirt, backwards hat is what really like does it.

There's something about it.

He looks like the kid from Rascal grown up.

That's what Gavin looks like.

The PS1 game.

That's dude.

That's Gavin.

Dude, that's grown up.

Gavin.

It's a little rascal.

Little rascal, Brett.

That Brett is a rascal.

Brett is a rascal, dude.

I've just never seen Gavin like in a hat and then had him turn it backwards and it went like, oh, shit, he's like so American.

It's crazy.

And I wanted everyone to know it was a new, it was a brand new hat.

So it's got the label on it.

He kept the sticker on.

It's an El Famoso hat.

It's from our merch partner that gave it to him.

And he brought it, kept the sticker on, put it on.

Crazy.

Crazy.

And I did something cool.

I brought my glove, Andrews, so I could catch foul balls if any came up.

And everybody made fun of me for it.

That's fucking cool, man.

I was going to save a life.

It would nullify the company bonus, though, because that has to be in the bun.

Yeah.

Right.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I'm not looking to get a bonus.

I just want a free foul ball.

Okay.

I thought you brought your glove to the racing.

You're going to catch any spare fenders.

Catch a tire.

Catch a nut or a bolt.

So you're a big racing guy now.

I wouldn't say that, but I had a lot of fucking fun.

You know, when I was, when I was a kid, my

second, my first stepfather, my second dad, real dickhead,

he

was a drag racer.

And so I spent most of my childhood at the drag races.

I'm not used to round track racing.

So, but yeah, it was like, it was like, it's been enough time where I did, I no longer feel

misery from having to be carted all around the country on the weekends when I would rather be playing with my friends, sitting in the fucking gravel parking lot, watching cars go straight.

Honestly, you don't even watch cars go straight a lot.

You watch cars get ready to go straight and then you watch cars

pulled off of the fucking racetrack, but very rarely, they go straight for like 13 seconds.

And then there's like an hour of waiting before the next car goes straight for 13 seconds.

This is way better.

As the cars are pulling off the race on the right side, it's kind of like like horse racing.

As they're like, as like the races, they wave the checkered flag, right?

And so like the Dotsons or whatever it is that are racing, as they go off on the right, immediately at the same time, other cars are coming at the top.

So as soon as the cars are off, a new race runs.

We watched like 20 races, it felt like in two hours.

It was awesome.

There was no break in the action.

Is it one of those things sort of like baseball where the experience is so heightened by being there?

Like it doesn't translate TV, like you never watch this on TV, but being there is a whole thing.

Exactly.

Never in a million years would I watch this on television.

But being there surrounded by the people that are there, the smells that are there, the noises, it's just like a whole, it really reminded me of my childhood

in a good way, I guess.

That's good.

It's awesome.

I would love to sponsor a car.

We could get a dumb.

What would be the thing we'd put on it?

Like, is it a hot dog?

Is it a port-a-potty?

Is it an Ian?

It's a hot dog is what we're putting on the car.

Oh, it could be a port-a-potty.

Well, it could be a port-a-potty.

We'll have to figure that out.

Be an apple.

Yeah.

Sketch something up.

We're all great at sketching.

If there's one thing that this show has established, great at drawings.

Who is the most autistic in the group?

It's not me.

Probably you, Gav.

Probably Gavin.

Yeah, I think Gavin.

I can't draw.

I'm gonna Gavin.

Yeah, Gavin.

I have a food thing that I think will really amuse Jeff.

Oh, okay.

I think you'll like this.

I really enjoy looking at menus on Uber Eats for restaurants because occasionally you get typos that can be really funny.

And I got an all-time typo for a menu item.

It's the most unfortunate typo I think you can make for any food.

Let me introduce you to the delicious one-of-a-kind.

Where is it?

Fuck.

That was really cool.

That would be so cool.

Nick, did you edit this?

You were doing such a good job of filling before you crested the hill and then you got there and there was nothing.

You should probably edit this to make him look badass.

No, it's fine.

You can leave the competence in.

Let me save this.

It is

none other than the jalapeno poopers.

Enjoy some jalapeno poopers.

Fresh off the menu.

No.

I will go to this specific restaurant, not to order, but just to look at it and laugh.

It makes me so happy.

I'll take the 10-piece pooper.

You want the five-piece or the the 10-piece poopers?

That's great.

Oh, Chris.

That's awesome.

Did you order them?

No.

I'm not a spicy guy.

I'd have been fascinated to see if that made it all the way through to the receipt.

I don't think it would because I looked at a different app and it is spelled correctly on

the other food app.

I forgot you're not a spice guy.

I have IBS and like stomach stuff, so it just is a bad combat.

Yeah.

It's got cream cheese cheese in it, which is fucking gross and not regulation at all.

And you probably just blew a bunch of noseblood down into your stomach with a CPAP, so it's not the time to be adding spice.

No.

It's still there, by the way.

Jalapedo Pooper still

hasn't been fixed.

It's also, it's vegan, so you know, it's a large...

You can get it if you want it.

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I was thinking the other day, we're uh, we're now a year in.

We're past a year, right?

We had our anniversary episode.

Yes.

We had our 50-second episode.

We had our stream.

We are in the office now.

We did a great job of announcing through the podcast that we're in the office, apparently.

And

it seems like maybe this would be a really good time to schedule a sausage talk.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

To talk about everything that we've been through, do the behind, you know, the whatever, the behind the sausage of it all.

It just feels like

right, like one year in and with all the major changes that we've just had, that probably is the time to address all that.

And it feels like it's probably a little too boring to talk about in the main podcast.

So.

yeah, we could definitely do that.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Let's do one soon.

I'll put a post up so we can do questions.

Yeah, I think we should definitely take questions from the audience for this one and maybe schedule that sometime next week.

Yeah, I'm cool.

You guys want to, we want to try for that maybe in like the middle of the week next week?

Sounds good.

Yeah.

Okay.

Cool.

Cool, cool, cool.

Maybe Wednesday.

While we're talking about that, we had a discussion the other day that on Monday at our regular meeting that we should maybe come up with some drafts, some new draft ideas.

Do we want to do that in podcast or in Sausage Talk?

Where would be the best place for that?

I think in Sausage.

Okay.

Well, I prepared a list of a bunch.

So, oh, can you give us like, can you give us a tease?

Yeah, can you just give us like two?

Yeah, well, first off, I picked there were a bunch that were already on the board that were pretty good still that I don't think we remember.

Like the Bad Day draft, like with movies like Speed and Falling Down, Best Actor, Worst Movie, One Hit Wonder draft is good.

Sidekick draft, I think, was good.

But I I was thinking we could do a video game protagonist draft,

creature draft, guys named James draft.

What do you think about that?

I looked it up.

Over the last 100 years, James is the most common name.

So I thought, why don't we pull, why don't we do a draft of famous Jameses?

Oh, we can do that.

Just an idea.

Would that include Jims and Jimmys?

I don't know.

We'd have to discuss that in Sausage Talk, I think.

Oh, yeah.

And then I thought it'd be fun.

What if we did a Nick Cage draft?

Nick Cage would be great.

You just draft your favorite Nick Cage characters.

Well, you, you have, you've always wanted to do Cage Fight.

Yeah.

I've been, I've been thinking.

I think it's because I saw him as John Madden the other day, and I have just been thinking about him being John Madden ever since.

I'm so excited to see him as John Madden.

It looks so the screenshot I saw looks so bizarre, but believable somehow.

Nick Cage, John Madden.

Let me see.

I know he was making that.

I didn't know they released any photos of what he looks like.

Oh, wow.

Right here.

It's a

David O.

Russell movie, too, which is crazy.

That also does not look like Christian Bale at all.

Yeah, that's Christian Bale.

That's Christian Bale.

Yeah.

Isn't that crazy?

He looks like Billy the Exterminator.

It does not look like him at all.

Like, they nailed it.

It's pretty good.

It's pretty good.

That's fantastic.

Everybody come up.

If you guys don't have, if you haven't done your brainstorming yet,

let's plan to do our draft talk on next week when we sausage.

Let's do it.

I would love to do anything related to Nick Cage.

What a fun career he has had.

That's just the best.

So many great movies.

And I haven't even seen The Rock.

I know that's an all-time for him.

Oh, we go watch that with you.

We do.

It's a James Bond film.

What's everybody's favorite Nicholas Cage movie?

Oh, Raising Arizona.

Easily.

Probably Conair.

You like that more than the Snake Eyes?

Yeah, I like Conair.

Do you guys ever see Deadfall?

I think that might be my favorite one.

Deadfall?

Yeah.

He was fucking insane in that movie.

No.

Yeah,

that's where he karate chops a guy and he goes, hi, fucking yeah.

It's pretty cool.

Yeah.

Yeah, yeah that's that's the best part of that movie it's like the only part of that movie where i'm like very very into it

he's in a movie called mom and dad which i think was directed by the crank people or maybe they just produced it and he is so much fun in mom and dad i'll have to see that i've never heard of it it's great it's a really fun premise where parents start murdering their kids like something happened like there's like a an attack where like a frequency makes parents instinctually want to murder their kids and it's a lot of him trying to kill his kids being crazy.

That's a crazy concept for a movie.

Yeah, that's uh,

there's a it's like a 28 weeks later.

I don't know if you remember the opening of that movie.

It's they have one of those type scenes, but it's when school is dismissed, and all the parents are just like at the gates ready to kill.

It's insane, it's a really fun, over-the-top movie.

So, how do the kids win?

Oh, they largely don't.

It's like 98% of the kids kids dying and then following Nick Cage's kids trying to survive him and his wife murdering them.

I wonder if...

Could you take Nick Cage just being insane on camera?

Take all of that from all of his movies and make a feature-length montage of him being a lunatic.

Oh, definitely.

Oh, yeah.

Absolutely.

Definitely.

He has a whole thing in Mom and Dad where

he's trying to set up a pool table and he can't get a level and he just fucking loses it.

And it is so good.

Is that before the murdering starts?

I don't remember.

It might be a flashback.

Oh.

It has one of the greatest,

like halfway through the movie, the doorbell rings, and he just goes, Grandpa's here.

And like, you as an audience member go, like, oh, shit.

The tables are turning.

Like, he's also being hunted.

Yeah, now he's going to be hunted by grandpa.

I think grandpa's played by Christopher Lloyd, if I'm remembering correctly.

Oh, hell yeah.

We got to watch that movie.

How did that movie not win an Academy Award?

The crazy thing about Nick Cage, too, is because of his money problems, he makes more movies than you can watch.

So you're not going to be able to catch up on his catalog until he's dead because he makes like seven new movies a week.

It's like that YouTube stat where like 400 hours are uploaded every minute or something.

It's impossible.

How much Nicolas Cage film footage is uploaded every year?

Speaking of movies,

I missed out on all the Equalizer talk.

So I watched all three Equalizer movies.

Whoa!

Pretty good.

Yeah.

There's some crazy moments.

There's no stakes whatsoever in the whole movie.

You don't ever think, oh, he might lose this fight.

No, the Equalizer ever lose.

I don't know.

That's sort of the point, though.

That's what...

I like so much.

And it's sort of my biggest criticism of the second film is in the first one, every single interaction, he's like, I'm giving you an out.

Yeah.

You can, you can do the right thing.

You don't need to escalate this.

And they never do.

And then he fucks them up.

It's great.

There's that moment in the third one at the very beginning after he runs through the drug house.

And then the little kid, I don't want to spoil it.

So put the earmuffs.

But when the little kid from the car shoots him and he sits down and he puts the gun up to his head and he's going to blow his brains out because he knows he's shot and he's done.

And then there's no bullets left.

That was fucking crazy.

He lost in that moment.

Has anyone ever in a movie?

Like, imagine imagine if the bullet got stuck in him and he took it out of himself and then used it to kill himself i think that'd be a badass moment that's interesting

i thought the second one was so freaking on the nose with the storm metaphors there was like 10 references to the storm coming yep yeah i don't love the second one as much but one and three i think are great the third one he spoil earmuffs like he gets the guy's money back for him but then the person from the government just gives it to him in cash.

But the IRS is going to be all over that.

Why not just put it in his account?

In cash?

Ridiculous.

Yeah, and cash is a move.

He's got to be real smart with what he does with that money.

She's going to dump that bag and immediately call the IRS.

That was What's Her Face?

Was that Ellie Fanning or Dakota Fanning?

Dakota.

Yeah.

Yeah.

What's your favorite scene in the second one, Gavin?

Something stand out to you?

Probably when he's just stood outside the house telling him what he's gonna do and the kids

that is the moment of that movie is when he's in their driveway and asks for his wife

drop him off it's oh it's so good i'll be honest i somehow completely missed all those movies i don't think i even heard of that franchise i don't i didn't even know he'd ever done a sequel three of them and a fourth one on the way That scene is so fucking bone-chilling when he's like, I'm going to kill each and every one of you.

And he goes, he goes, there's nothing you can do about it.

That is such a fuck you he's like i'm going to kill you and there's nothing you can do to stop me

it is funny though to to watch the movie and just be like whenever a bad guy like steps to him or like messes with him you just think ah he's just committed suicide he's just killed himself

he's gonna die now they managed to make a movie about a protagonist who's never actually in any danger really thrilling still though you know yeah the most danger i feel like was in the first one for sure in the glass and all that.

Yep.

Oh, they're good movies.

I finished all the Tom Cruise movies.

I'm not done.

I'm sad at Mission Impossible.

I ranted out the whole list of full rankings.

You said Busting Loose was your favorite?

Is that right?

Yeah.

Yep.

My favorite one.

Losing it.

I have that last.

I can drop.

I can copy and paste and drop my full best to worst Tom Cruise.

I think

number one, Mission Impossible 3.

I think it's the best Tom Cruise can deliver.

So that's in order.

Worst to best.

Worst to best.

Wow, collateral's high up there.

I love collateral.

I don't know if I ever saw collateral.

So this is Andrew's official Tom Cruise ranking.

These are my official rankings.

Wow.

I think collateral is so much fun because he so rarely just plays an unapologetic villain.

And I think what Tom Cruise is really good at is intensity.

And he's so intense.

And that's

man.

You really like taps.

I did.

Yeah, it's a good movie.

I like how far above Jack Reacher, Tropic Thunder is.

I didn't love the Jack Reacher movies.

People really like those movies.

I didn't

really, I don't know.

Werner Herzog is in the first one, and he's the best part.

I only saw the second one, and I didn't think it was great.

It's terrible.

The second one, so bad.

Well, you're going to do this with another actor now that you're done with Cruise?

Well, I'm almost done with Denzel Washington.

I got like nine more of those.

And let me say, his career, much stronger.

So many better leads.

You thought the mummy was better than Cocktail?

Yeah.

I haven't seen the mummy, and I would also put it better than Cocktail.

That's awesome.

That mummy, that movie's bad.

It's so bad.

It took me like six times to watch it, but Cocktail is horrendous.

It just is a waste of time by the end of it.

I didn't realize Koco Mo was part of that movie.

That was a reveal in it.

But yeah, Losing It, Legend, Cocktail, The Mummy, and Far and Away.

Bottom five.

How long did it take you to do this?

A few months, I guess.

I realized that I just sort of naturally had seen like 85%

of these, and then a lot of them were on streaming services that I have, so it's able to pretty easily round it out.

How many movies is this?

It's like 45.

Wow, that's a pretty solid list of a career, though.

It is

not a lot of stinkers in there.

Uh, I would say, like,

I would say, like, maybe risky business is the worth watching line okay i think this is a fascinating metric like if you took every actor did the list in exactly this order it would be interesting to mark how far down the list the stinkers end yeah well that's sort of my i have like different tiers in my head where anything

anything above vanilla sky you could just completely skip and then from vanilla sky through rock of ages it's fine and then jerry maguire to Tropic Thunder, or I guess it really Jerry Maguire down, I think, is worth watching.

I wonder which good actor has the most stinkers.

I feel like Colin Farrell would have some ultra stinkers, but he's not bad.

Yeah, he, yeah, that's a great one.

Because he's kind of a stink pot, but he's really good.

I really, yeah.

In Bruges is so much fun.

It is a great movie.

Great movie.

Colin Farrell is such a good pick, Gavin.

Because you want to pick, I feel like Anthony Hopkins might also be one of those where a lot of bad movies, but consistently great.

Nick says Clive Owen.

Oh, Clive Owen's a good one.

Interesting.

He kind of came out of nowhere when he hit, and he was suddenly in a bunch of great stuff all at once.

It's funny to go back and watch like the born identity and see that he's random hitman, number two.

He's one of the bad guys in it, yeah.

Yeah.

Oh, yeah.

He's a very memorable bad guy, though, even though he doesn't say a lot.

What was the first, what was his breakout movie?

Was it Croupie A?

Was the first like Clive Owen film that hit, I feel like?

You guys remember that movie?

For me, it was like King Arthur.

It's a good Koupier is a good-ass movie.

You should watch that.

Is it Close or Closer or something?

Isn't that one of his big movies?

Closer?

Closer?

Yeah.

That's a Close.

What the fuck?

That's a

Closer is a fantastic movie.

Closer is incredible.

I feel like that was an early one for him.

That children of men, like, because that's all that 2000, like early 2000s, middle 2000s.

And then after, what was the one?

Shoot him up?

That's probably where he starts.

That's like where you go, this is fun.

And then it all just sort of like, uh-oh, I don't know if it ever comes back from this.

And I don't think it does.

Oh, yeah, according to Wikipedia, Croupier attracted a strong critical following in North America and helped launch his acting career there.

Oh, cool.

Is he in a hair movie?

What?

No, he's not.

I don't know why he's thinking.

There's a movie with Paul Giamatti and Tom Wilkinson about hair, hair loss that's really good.

I thought he may have been in that, but I don't think he is.

Tom Wilkinson was a good villain.

Great villain.

Do you think Russell Crowe belongs on this list or no?

Yes.

Yeah.

Oh, yeah.

Oh, virtuosity is so bad.

He has like a run where it's like Gladiator, Beautiful Mind, Master Commander, like Cinderella Man, 310 to Yuma.

Like he's in, it's like hit, hit, hit, like romper stomper.

Romper stomper is so fucking crazy.

And then I think Robin Hood happens and he does like Le Les Miz.

And then that's

like, yes, I don't, I don't know that he comes back from that.

Well, nice guys was good.

I like nice guys.

Oh, nice guys is great.

Yeah.

I like nice guys a lot.

And he was in Craven the Hunter.

So, you know, it's like good stuff.

It's really interesting watching movies where like you're being guided by the actor and not knowing like the plot or who's in some of these other films to see the overlap.

So like Denzel Washington is in a movie with Gene Hackman, and he talked about that like Gene Hackman was the best actor he worked with.

And now anytime Gene Hackman pops up, like if he's in one of these, he's in the firm, which is a Tom Cruise film, and he just kills it.

Like it's, he's consistently like one of those.

Wow.

He is so fucking good in everything that he's in.

Wendy Denzel was grabbing that guy's arm in the equalizer three, and he was like, that's a three.

And then he would twist it more and be like, that's a four.

I was kind of bummed when he stabs the shit out of him.

He didn't just say that's a 10 and walk away.

Was that when he was telling me he was going to make him shit his pants or whatever?

Yeah.

That was so fucking cool because that setup is you're like, he's going to be dealing with these little punks for the next 45 minutes.

And then two seconds later, he's like, he kills them all with a car and you don't even, it just fucking unfolds in front of you.

And you're like, oh, I guess they're not an issue.

Yeah.

They get built up way more than the other villain.

And then he just dismisses all of them out of the movie.

It's like, oh, I guess it's the other villain.

Yeah.

That was wild.

Because you think there's going to be some power struggle between the brothers and stuff, you know, that they're setting up.

And then absolutely not.

100% not.

No.

I don't think I'd call myself a villain, but I've been having a lot of fun being a robot in the new office.

Little Esrobo.

People love the robot, and people have named the robot.

I didn't notice that.

Yeah, a lot of gizmos going out there for the robot.

Oh, I've been seeing Dilbot.

Dilbot?

Oh, I've seen Dilbotton Dilba too.

Oh, I feel like I've seen tons of comments, David,

funny.

Gizmo and Dilbot.

Pretty good.

That's pretty good.

If you're not familiar with what we're talking about, in the anniversary stream that we did from the office, where we announced and showed the Office Off for the first time,

we also bought this little pet robot.

It's designed, it's like a little ball that's designed to drive around and keep an eye on your pets when you're not at home.

And you can talk to them and record video and shit.

And it's surprisingly robust for a little robot.

And we bought one that Andrew controls so that he's physically in the office.

And we debuted it in that live stream.

And he instantly became a hit.

Well, with the audience, but with us too.

With us too.

It is so fun and so useful.

I was making screenshots.

I was making thumbnails the other day and I needed to make a thumbnail of the office for the tour video.

And I hadn't taken any photos and I didn't want to drive all the way to the office to take a photo.

So I used Andrew bot to take a screenshot of the mannequins so that it could be the thumbnail for it, and it worked like a charm.

I think that would definitely set the record for the laziest thumbnail of all time

You didn't even go to the place where you took the thumbnail picture.

I think it's the most innovative and coolest thumbnail of all time because I use technology to solve the problem.

It's the best use of technology slash the worst use of legs for a thumbnail ever.

I took some photos when I was driving around on the stream.

This is me being held up to the cake.

We had a little cake break, celebrate.

Took a little cake photo.

Happy birthday, erectus.

Eric and us.

Clearly, what it says, Eric and us.

Have been driving around as this robot every day in the office.

I just, I just take a little stroll around the office.

I see what's going on.

However, last night, I unfortunately, robot, robo, I'm a little stuck.

I'm in a little trouble.

I was trying to cause a little bit of mischief and I got stuck.

Yeah.

I went by the office yesterday at like, I I don't know, lunchtime, and he was upside down under a chair.

So I rescued him there.

But I guess I got to go back again.

I wonder if we need to get a second bot in there.

That's just the recovery bot.

The recovery?

Like, now we're playing Snowrunner, essentially.

Yeah.

We just got a fleet of bots.

Yeah.

I'll post the photo of the bot's current position.

when I got stuck last night as I was trying to cause a little bit of mischief.

Looking up at the ceiling, is it?

What happened was I was exploring around the office and I noticed some doors were partially open and the little Esrobos having none of that.

So I'm shoving the doors as wide open as they can and I was having a great time.

And I went into one of the rooms and I noticed that there was a regulation baseball bat in the corner.

And I thought, oh, I'm going to knock that thing over.

Is that I'm going to do it.

I'm going to cause a little bit of mischief.

I tried to knock it over going one way and it was going great until there's a little nub in the wall that is supposed to be a door stopper but it's not like fully extended so it's just like this little point that's sticking out so the bat got stuck against it and i couldn't go anymore that way so i decided to attack it from the other direction and i went full speed and i think i hit the bat and then went up and i'm stuck up on the bat i think you should start doing screen captures from your adventures at night so we can watch them later yeah i i'll start doing that more regularly but yeah i'm popping in all the time i'm seeing what's going on it's exciting when somebody clearly has been there recently not knowing if anyone's in the office can you hear through it can you can you hear us talking i can hear through it and i can talk through it oh excellent you could definitely howl through it can you actually speak yeah i can speak through it oh that's good i think my favorite part of the stream is when we locked Dilbot in the freezer and then put a mic in the freezer with him and it just looked like it just sounded like the ice machine was good it just going bonkers slamming into everything and howling it was incredible I love the robot.

I love it.

Gizmo and Dilbot.

It's fantastic.

We also realized you can record from it, right?

You can record video from it.

And so Andrew can, in essence, become a camera when we're doing like supplementals and stuff, live action supplementals.

We can have the Dilbot view and maybe even do like his version.

Like, you know, we could have like Andrew's director's cut of all this, you know.

Yeah.

Get like a different angle of everything.

If we do anything like on the counter or directly on the floor, he's going to have such a good shot of it.

Anything in between those things, I don't know.

We should maybe get a ramp from the counter to the ground so he can come up.

That's a great idea.

I was testing it yesterday, so that's like a two-minute video, me just rolling around, bumping into stuff.

It could be a little dizzying, but you can see me like swinging open the doors, going into the bathroom, opening the bathroom door.

This is so funny.

Did it feel like you were there with us?

It did.

Yeah.

It really did.

I'm immediately going for the bat in this clip, trying to get that going.

It felt like you were there with us.

Like, I was trying to be mindful of your positioning and then putting you on

the armrest and you taking like swan dives off and then knocking over Sonas and everything.

Like, between that and Jeff turning off the game on the 29th turn, it really

was, it was a great anniversary, you know?

That was

once again, I'm really disappointed in Nintendo for that.

Really poor UI, but we survived.

We persevered.

I re-watched you diving onto my knee, and you only fall from like half a foot, but it like twatted the weird funny boat area of my knee.

It hurts so much.

It couldn't have caused more damage, I think, from that position.

He's a heavy little bowl mall.

Yeah, and it wasn't even on purpose.

Yeah, there's a swan dive for victory.

Complete accident.

I didn't mean to hit you.

It's really funny, like, because I have such a great forward perspective, but anything peripherally or behind me, I have no idea.

So going back and watching the clip of me knocking over Nick's Dr.

Pepper onto the iPad, I didn't know I did that in the moment.

I'm just trying to move around.

We also threw you some M ⁇ Ms and you drove over them backwards.

Yep.

Yeah, I'm still watching this video of you declaring war on this baseball bat and he seems to have got it wedged.

Yeah, I got it wedged.

Then I came back hours later at night to be like, you know what?

I think I can do this.

And then I got stuck.

Robot is so much fun.

I can't wait to do more stuff with it.

Dilbot is a orgismo.

I don't know which I like better.

The Andrew Robot is a great example of how having the office is going to improve our opportunities for content, I think.

Like we weren't in the office for five minutes before he became the most popular thing in the history of the company, I think.

I just am excited for you guys to be able to do live action stuff like the break show and that type of thing.

You came out from under the couch.

Your reveal was that you were under the couch and I had no idea you were there.

It was a reveal to me.

I got so nervous because Nick walked out of the room and I was like, oh, I'd like to, where am I going to pop out from?

Because we talked about me popping out.

And I realized I could fit under the couch, but I couldn't go further back because that's where the rug would cut out.

And I didn't want to be stalled and trying to wheel out.

So I thought, I'm in cover.

I think I should be okay.

And then the stream started and I could see me in the bottom.

of the couch on the stream and I was just going, oh, I hope they don't see me.

I hope they don't see my little robot because I was so noticeable.

I'm still watching this video.

I'm now watching the effort you took to open the bathroom door, and you're showing us a bunch of rot under the counters.

Yeah, yeah, I immediately regretted going over by the toilet.

I think we need to give you a wash now.

Yeah, I can use some cleaning.

Oh, that's filthy.

That's an old house we're living in.

Yeah, I feel like it's up.

It's a perfect level of dog shit for us.

It's all creaky and shitty.

Those hardwood floors are softwood floors.

I'm excited to find out about Gavin and Nick's show in the room that we can't go in.

Yeah.

Yeah, you better stay out.

There's a sign.

I can't go in.

You're working on it?

Yeah.

We're brainstorming.

Oh, you walked a bunch of toilet floor all over our cables.

You're making it dirty, Andrew.

I'm just exploring the place a little bit.

I'm seeing what's going on.

Cause a little mischief.

Nick, give your cables a wipe.

Yeah.

Can you live stream from a GoPro?

see why not if you've got a capture card yeah if we can interesting oh oh why do you want to keep it mobile on that thing i just i'm just thinking it would be fun to do like a little robo stream at some point just like a surprise i wonder if it would be a thing where

you can

use discord to send that video if we can capture it somehow to discord and then we can ingest it and then live stream it out you know what i mean yeah i'll mess with it i know that's like kind of like a lot of steps but i i i'm sure there's a way that we can do that uh because I, I think it's a great idea.

I wanted a GoPro for this thing because it seems like it would be easier for all this stuff.

Dude, I love the perspective that you have on this.

It's so fisheye lens.

It makes you feel like a little creature like scurrying around the ground.

It's so funny.

Yeah.

I showed this to someone they said it'll look like an album cover just with the perspective of it.

That's awesome.

Oh, man.

I think my favorite thing was when you would just like wheel into the room and then just stare at one of us, like mean muggers from across the room.

It is a little intimidating.

Do you want to be in the

supplementals we're about to do?

I would love to.

Hell yeah.

I want to make some spiral food.

Oh, I got to go get all the supplies for that after we record today.

Do we have supplies for Gumpler?

We have the Gumpler ingredients and we have the molds.

We just need...

uh pots and stuff okay we just need some you know that kind of shit sweet let's do it tito's handmade vodka is America's favorite vodka for a reason.

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Other food thing.

I got this ice cream and it has a really dumb novelty to it that I really like.

It's the ice cream is inside of other food.

You scoop it out.

I got it from Costco.

So it's like peanut colada ice cream in a coconut shell.

It's a real coconut shell.

It's a really silly gimmick, but it has me thinking, what would be other foods that would be delicious served in other foods?

It's like a sorbet thing.

Oh, I see.

And the food has to be related to what it's in.

I guess, yeah.

I mean, like a twice-baked potato is good.

Oh, that's such a great example of it.

Yeah.

It's tough to like make a bowl out of food.

There's not a lot of necessarily like serving foods.

What about deviled eggs?

That's a good one.

That's a great one.

You take out like the yolk and stuff and then you like do all the shit and then put them back in, don't you?

Oh, okay.

100%.

That may be the best example, actually.

Right?

You don't put them back in the shell.

No, no, no, no, no.

You just put it back in like the egg white.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Right.

But

yeah.

I think we should put them back in the shell, though.

Eat the shell.

I think cracking open an egg shell and finding a deviled egg inside would be so cool.

It would be quite a surprise.

What else would be...

My brain keeps going hot dog and that's dumb.

That's just not how that works.

Yeah, but it is a food and a food, technically.

I mean, like bread bowls, right?

Like when you have like tomato soup in in a bread bowl or spaghetti in a bread bowl, which we talked about inventing.

But I feel like you waste the bread to make a bread bowl.

Like you're not using that bread when you scoop it out to do something else with it.

You make croutons out of it.

Yeah, I make croutons.

What other food?

What other food is served in itself?

Grapefruit.

Right, but you're not like taking it out to like do something to it to put it back in.

No, but you got to like cut it out of itself and then just leave it in the little hole.

I got to say, I think most foods might be elevated if served within a coconut.

I really enjoy the little coconut.

Like a steak?

A steak in a coconut would be tough because you got to cut the steak.

Would you eat a steak out of a cow's skull?

Oh my god.

Oh.

It's like eating monkey brains.

How big is the skull?

How big is a skull?

Size of a cow.

But it's like, I'm sure the skulls have different sizes, do they not?

Like you and I both have heads.

We don't have the same size.

head.

Well, around the

around the.

Oh, we got a scan.

Can I eat ice cream out of your head?

Please.

Oh, wow.

That's gotta be better than a coconut.

We just gotta figure out how to measure it.

I'm gonna eat a steak out of Andrew's skull.

This is exciting.

If we scan your head, 3D print it, that could be our popcorn bucket.

Oh, popcorn and ice cream bucket.

I don't know if they make enough popcorn to fit it all in that.

It might be too big.

We'll shrink it.

I wonder if anybody's ever eaten popcorn and ice cream at the same time.

Maybe at a movie.

Could you mix those together?

That's kind of awkward because one's such a finger food and the other one you need a spoon.

Or like, I guess you could just lick it.

I mean, can you get ice cream desserts at the Alamo?

Yeah.

Yeah.

If you've got a popcorn refill going still, you might have both.

Yeah.

Combine them somehow.

I read recently that if you freeze popcorn, it doesn't get like stuck in your teeth before you eat it.

Really?

Should we test that out too?

Yeah, we probably should.

Okay, yeah.

Can we absolutely?

I want to test that out so bad.

Okay.

Popcorn.

I feel feel like that would suck to put butter on, though.

Jeff, can you make popcorn the night before and then freeze it and bring it in?

That way, we're not like, oh, we have this popcorn we have to put in the freezer for a little while.

That way, it's like it's ready to go.

Yeah, I'll do it right after we're done.

Why don't we, Gavin, 3D print everybody's head and see whose head has the best ice cream taste?

Like, whose head is the most enjoyable to eat ice cream out of?

Oh, all right, yeah.

Oh, yeah, who's got like the best, who's who's the best vessel?

What if we printed all the heads and made like nesting head doll

that's such a good idea

there might be a big gap though between the first one and the number two i don't think it's gonna be as progressive four heads all morphed through each other inside one big head how do we do that how do i what measurements do i need to send you you just need to get that app and then scan your head tell me that tell me the app send me the app okay i'll send you the app i don't know if he'll send it as a picture or a set of pictures i don't know we'll find out i also have in my notes that nick should eat uh 100 oysters why what's that from

nick can't believe you just said that that was crazy we were talking about oysters recently uh i like oysters but a hundred oysters

you could just do a do like a bucket of oysters oh god wasn't this something we talked about on the stream a bucket yeah a hundred no how many is in a bucket to you how big is your bucket I imagine it'd be like a popcorn bucket of oysters.

It'd be an Andrew's head of oysters.

Do you think you could fit 100 oysters in a popcorn bucket, Gavin?

Yeah.

You do stack a bit.

What's the most oysters anyone's ever eaten?

Yeah, do you think you would go like one at a time, or would you just sort of shoot them back as a big, big sneeze?

Oh, no, one at a time.

Yeah, I think you need to, I think you need the action in between, or you'd go insane.

Do you think the oysters are like bananas where if you eat enough of them, you die of poisoning somehow?

Oh my god, mercury poisoning, right?

Oh, it'd be mercury, yeah.

The world record for oyster eating in 10 minutes was set in 2005 by Sonia the Black Widow Thomas.

Black widow.

Does anyone care to guess how many oysters she ate?

Oh, God.

My stomach already hurts.

I'm going to say 350.

I'm going to say 1,200.

She ate

46 dozen, which I think is 522.

552.

Is that right?

46 times 12.

I did it in dozens.

Maybe I could do 100.

She's like the terminator of the sea.

552 in 10 minutes.

So, yeah, Nick, you could eat 100 and four minutes, probably.

Well, let's not put a time on it.

Would you like dress each one, put a bit of lemon on, or like put a bit of horseradish, or would you just take them as they come?

I'll bet as it goes along, they progressively just get slurped with less and less on them.

Can you imagine you're sitting in a movie theater, you're waiting for the film to start, the door opens, you look to your right, and a man walks in with a popcorn bucket filled with oysters.

You continue to watch.

As they sit down, they then pull a lemon from their pocket and a juicer and juice all of the oysters over the bucket.

What a nightmare.

I think what we should do, Nick, is if you just chug a bucket of oysters,

you'll have both hands around the bucket and I could just be squeezing a lemon right in front of your mouth.

so they're getting lemoned as they go in.

Oh, right, yeah.

Efficient.

Maybe Eric has the horseradish in a tube, just squeezing it.

Oh,

horseradish tube.

We're got like a little assembly line feeding you oysters.

What is it horseradish?

Well, the horses don't, they can't have anything to do with this.

I gotta look it up.

Why is it called horseradish?

Like a crab apple?

The crabs certainly don't have anything to do with the apples either i don't know why we're crediting these animals yeah oh uh

the name horseradish is believed to be a mispronunciation of the german word meritich which means sea radish mere sounds similar to the english word mare which led some to mistakenly associate it with horses.

The name horseradish first appeared in English in 1597.

Additionally, the word horse in horseradish may have been used figuratively to describe something strong or coarse, as in other phrases like horse parsley.

So it became popularized because people are stupid.

That's so good.

Yeah.

I like that it became popular, but horse parsley didn't.

Horse parsley.

Nobody gives a shit about horse parsley.

Everyone's putting horse parsley on their dishes to make them look fancy.

I think maybe we got to bring, if we can talk about crests, I think we can bring back horse parsley.

Yeah.

I was trying to do research on whether it would be legal for me to bring crest seeds into the U.S.

for us all to grow some crest.

Is it?

Is it?

Uh, the Google AI thing, which is just constantly wrong, said it's not legal, but I don't.

I need to go further on it.

Yeah, I don't know if I can trust that.

Uh, but well, we're trusting what it just told us about horseradish because that was absolutely Google AI.

I hate that.

I hate it too.

I hate it.

That sucks.

Sucks hard.

I can send you a link to a version of Google somebody sent to me in the email that strips the AI out.

Oh, normal Google?

Hell yeah.

Yeah.

Why do people keep crediting horses with things?

Because you also got a horse fly.

Why are you saying keep?

No, he's right.

There's a lot of horse, non-horse stuff.

There's multiple horse things.

Horse power.

Yeah, but I don't know that people have done it lately.

Should we have a horse, not horse draft?

There's no horse.

And there's one round?

Yeah.

I got three.

Yeah, I got horse parsley, horseradish.

Horse parsley, a thing we just learned.

Horsepower.

Yeah, but horsepower, things

named.

A horse in itch.

Is that like a horse orphanage?

Yeah.

We'll make that a thing.

Horse in itch.

You want to adopt a horse that doesn't have parents?

Horse in itch.

There you go.

It just is weird.

How much would 100 oysters cost?

Is a horse paying for it?

How much does horse?

Is a horse dollar a thing?

Horse oyster?

It would be affordable.

Oh, okay.

I think you could do it.

Probably, I mean, it might cost you two bucks an oyster.

So, you know, you can buy 100

bay oysters for $52.95 on Tar Bay seafood.

I don't know if I want to eat something from Tar Bay.

Would you do it, Nick?

Or would you have?

Oh, no, you wouldn't have tartar sauce because it's white.

If it's fresh enough, sure.

Interesting.

I can get you 100 weekender oysters for $115.

There you go.

Get these bad boys right here.

I assume they'll arrive on ice in the shell.

We'll have a big group shucking into a bucket.

Oh, God.

And then I'll man the lemon.

Dude,

that's going to be so hard to watch.

I like oysters.

I think

two oysters are amazing.

A third oyster is pretty good.

A fourth oyster is edible.

And by six oysters, I'll throw up.

Yeah, I stop at three.

Three is the perfect amount for me.

I agree.

Three.

Two or three.

Have I even had oysters?

Have you never had an oyster?

I'm trying to remember how what what the

is what

time to come up with that question you're does that look familiar does that look like something you put in you would you be uncertain if you've had that nick what wait okay yeah oysters yeah yeah i was i was like i was confused for a second about clams versus oysters yeah how did you eat the oyster do you remember oh i guess it was out of that shell like that don't you put it up to your lips and you go like

yeah isn't that what you do i think it was an upscale restaurant, so I think we had to use like a spoon to wedge them out.

Yeah.

Dude, I'm really looking forward.

All right, buy 100 oysters.

Just Nick saying, have I had an oyster before?

20 minutes into us talking.

It's like the craziest thing I've ever heard.

I like seafood.

I just had to remember.

Man, wow.

I can't stop thinking about.

tartar sauce now.

Brought up tartar sauce.

What is it?

What's it made of?

I feel like it's a last name, right?

I don't know.

It's white.

It's probably mayo.

There's some chunky stuff in it.

Well, like it's made by Steve Tottenham.

Mayonnaise.

I was thinking like Jimmy Tartar.

It's just mayo.

White?

Chopped dilled

mayonnaise, caper, and sometimes shallots.

Jimmy Tartar?

Yeah, it sounds like it would be made by Jimmy Tartar.

Like Jimmy Carter?

That's a president.

That's completely different than Jimmy Tartar.

Oh, you think they misheard that too?

So it's basically just dilled mayo.

Dilled mayo.

It's so interesting because I can't fucking stand tartar sauce.

But if I'm looking at it, I like one, two, three, four.

I like five of the seven ingredients.

It's just the mayonnaise and the sour cream.

If we could just get rid of all the white shit in the world, why can't we have tartar sauce without the white stuff?

We could potentially make dried tartar without the white stuff and see if it

still works.

Yeah, there's a hockey player named Tartar.

Maybe he made it.

Jimmy Tartar.

Tartar.

Tatar?

Is it Tatar?

Who invented Tartar Sauce?

Who invented it?

Tartar hockey.

Thomas Tartar.

Tatar.

Tatar.

Thomas Tatar.

France.

I mean, he looks like he would have made tartar sauce, but it's Tatar.

Thomas Tatar.

Is he French?

I don't think so.

Thomas Tatar.

Tater?

Thomas Tatar.

Stop the show.

What are you saying?

I don't know.

I'm trying to figure it out.

Thomas.

Thomas Tater.

It's T-A-T-A-R.

What?

Oh, that's Tater.

But it has a fancy.

It's got a bunch of fancy symbols on it.

Tomas?

Tomas Tatar?

I think it's Tatar.

Pretty sure it's Tatar.

There's the name.

See, it's got some accents over it.

Yeah, in the front

of the Tartar.

Tartar sauce is named for steak tartare and thus ultimately named for the tatars

with which it was commonly served in 19th century France.

What's tatars?

Turkish people.

Oh,

so it's not Jimmy Tartar.

You know, I got to be interesting.

I just spent a whole lot of time over in Turkey and tartar sauce never came up.

Really?

I don't think, I don't think it's like actual, I don't think it's like exclusively Turkish.

I think it's people through like Eastern Europe and Asia.

Looks like it's pretty popular in Hungary back in the day.

I think it's interesting that some sauces are just what they are and other sauces are people and like groups.

Yeah, you know?

Like honey mustard is just honeyed mustard.

And then you got tartar sauce and that's named after a group of people in Europe or whatever.

You just said.

And then what's another group of people sauce?

Ketchup.

Wrap this up.

We need to go.

We need to end this.

What the fuck?

I don't know what ketchup means, but it's not a ketchup.

We're going to buy 100 oysters.

I got to go freeze some popcorn.

Jimmy Mayo.

All right.

I'm going to end it now.

Unless anybody wants to continue.

Not go for it.

Alfred Relish.

Here we go.

It's going to be a good ending.

Thank you for listening to another episode of the Regulation Podcast.

We hope you enjoyed it as much as we enjoyed making it for you.

As always,

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Tune in next week for more

Tater Sauce Talk.

Are there any foods that animals make?

Okay, bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Save it.

Bye.

Bye.

Save it.

Bye.

Animals make eggs, dumbass.

Oh, shit.

That's a good one.

I'm not an eggs guy.