A Scandal in Bohemia - Part Five

Tito's handmade vodka is America's favorite vodka for a reason.

From the first legal distillery in Texas, Tito's is six times distilled till it's just right and naturally gluten-free, making it a high-quality spirit that mixes with just about anything.

From the smoothest martinis to the best Bloody Marys, Tito's is known for giving back, teaming up with nonprofits to serve its communities, and do good for dogs. Make your next cocktail with Tito's.

Distilled and bottled by Fifth Generation Inc., Austin, Texas. 40% alcohol by volume.
Savor responsibly.

Adobe Acrobat Studio, so brand new. Show me all the things PDFs can do.
Do your work with ease and speed. PDF spaces is all you need.
Do hours of research in an instant.

With key insights from an AI assistant. Pick a template with a click.
Now your preso looks super slick. Close that deal.
Yeah, you won. Do that, doing that, did that, done.

Now you can do that, do that with Acrobat. Now you can do that, do that with the all-new Acrobat.
It's time to do your best work with the all-new Adobe Acrobat Studio.

I am so excited for this spa day. Candles lit, music on, hot tub warm and ready.

And then my chronic hives come back. Again, in the middle of my spa day, what a wet blanket.
Looks like another spell of itchy red skin.

If you have chronic spontaneous urticaria or CSU, there is a different treatment option. Hives during my next spa day? Not if I can help it.
Learn more at treatmyhives.com.

For just £6 a month, binge ad-free adventures in full and have access to so much more over at patreon.com forward slash Sherlock and Co.

Previously on Sherlock and Co.

His

ancestry. You have seen the picture.
I have

the queen and her beautiful John. A blind baby sent away.
How did you get past Nilberton's password? Cerverus.

Oh. God of the underworld is.
Cerberus. Do you wish this boy to be paraded on the front of every paper as you throw the British crown into chaos? Fire reveals

everything. Even God.

Even God. The burning bush, of course.
Check out Rabbi Sherlock. Ta-da! Hey,

Mini Money. So we can record separate places.
At the same time. Rare.
I get fooled like that.

You've got the Mazetta costume. Half of it.
Yeah. I'm Daisy Norton.
First cover Mazetta. Ah, right.

Rather striking resemblance. And singing voice.
But Irene's got a little more razzle-dazzle. Right.
We'll read the flat. I can't get within an inch of this woman.
What makes you think you can?

The fire will reveal all. Burn her flat down.
No, but we can have her think that. You think if she fills with panic, she will do what I did.
I went back for Mary's music box.

I will see where she keeps the drive by a glance of her head, by a flick of her eyes, a quiver of her body language.

Tonight, there will be a police presence in the wings, along with our colleague Mariana Ametrazola. You cannot.
We won't.

Not until the performance reaches its end. What are you going to do? I'm going to win, Mr.
Ormstein.

I'm going to win.

This is the final part of a scandal in Bohemia.

Thank you for joining us on this adventure.

It has been a privilege to bring it to your ears. Good luck on this final hurdle.
Trigger warnings can be found in the description.

I um

yeah, this

is the final round

of the great game

between Mr. Holmes and Miss Adler.

Enjoy.

Did you record that?

Recording devices are prohibited in the auditorium.

Not but I obviously adhered to that rule, but video recording's a bit more obvious, isn't it? Hmm.

Okay, so we're just gonna watch her over and over and over again. That's fun.
That's then what? We're gonna go around her flat and put on a show ourselves.

Yeah,

okay.

How does she sing in a mask? Well, half mask, isn't it? A masquerade ball type number.

You you uh you talked about winning.

Do you

do you think she's playing some sort of game against you? Is that is that what this is about is that why you're obsessing over it because you

Hey, are you even listening to me?

Okay, well, I am ready when you are mate

Let the games begin

A lovely flat. Thank you, Doctor.

Where is our infamous young prince? With his childminder. Quite the responsibility.
She's unaware of his lineage. Put it that way.

I see.

Hard at work in there, huh?

In where, exactly? Your mind. I can hear it creaking from here.
Ah, yes. Just looking around for a hard drive? Just lying around, right? Maybe it's down between my couch cushions.

Who is he?

Who is who?

The killer.

I don't quite follow. Oh, you follow.
You've done more than enough following these past few days.

His name is James M.

James M.

Huh. Do you know him, Irene? No.

He came in right after you seemed to have something to do with your beef with Milverton. I said no, Doctor.
A remarkable coincidence. You punched him in the face 24 hours before he died.
Yeah, but.

Remarkable coincidence. Okay, you stabbed him.
We have evidence, and some guy comes in. Oh, okay.
So you're telling me that I left, and then someone went in and killed Britain's most hated man.

Color me shocked. Irene, do you expect us to believe? I expect very little from both of you at this point, Dr.
Watson. Okay, I get it.
Let's cut the crap. Let's be serious.
You, you know,

you have leverage, right? You have all the power you could want. John, I see this whole shtick, and I can understand how that might work out for you.

But frankly, I've been singing in a corset for three hours every night for a month. And this moment, this thing, whatever it is you're doing, is the most discomfort I have had in a while.

I know, shish, I know what you're gonna ask. You still think I want leverage.
You think I want something in exchange. Maybe there's some revenge plan I'm unfolding.

I'm not.

Okay?

It's done.

Ormstein is finished. And if you think I'm going to go trading that little hard drive for some magic beans or some shit, then you're dumber than you look, sound, and behave.
So listen, lover boys.

Lover boys. I have no interest in being your problem.

As long as you don't become mine.

Why do you still not know what I want?

I do know what you want.

You

do.

Yes.

A cup of tea.

If you wouldn't mind, John. With pleasure.
You read my mind. Irene.
I haven't succumbed to the whole tea thing yet. Black coffee? There's some in the pot.
Lovely.

Okay.

Um.

okay.

Uh yes, we have a sensor up here.

Okay, gonna

God's sake, gonna need to stand on the chair. Alright.

Oh, God's sake.

Need to stand on the table.

Okay.

Come on.

Come on.

Shit.

Shit, it's not working. It's actually not working.

What sort of sensor are you? Um.

I need something, something. Uh, what do I need

apart from the miracle? Um,

cooking spray, cooking spray, cooking spray, because why not? I've already lost my mind. Right, here we go.

Okay, here we go, here we go. At home flamethrower, what could possibly go wrong?

All right,

oh,

shite, shite, that's mental.

Sprinklers!

Okay, here we go. Performance of a lifetime.
And Oscar goes too.

Oh, what the hell did you do? I didn't do anything. There is a fucking massive fire.
Oh, please, Watson. No, no, no, no, no.
Don't oh, please me. First, we have to follow her.

Then we have to pretend to be Dan and

Jack. And Jack? Then we've got to harass her in a bloody synagogue.
Now this. What exactly is this, Watson? I have done nothing.

Yeah, well, tell me after the ceiling is caved in, because there is black smoke coming from everywhere. Where? Everywhere! Out, out, out, now.

Fire brigade are coming. I'm not leaving.
Are you insane? I sing in a language I don't understand every night in front of 2,000 people, John. Of course I'm insane.
Fine, fine. I'll see you later.

I'll let the orphanage know your son's on the way, idiot. Watson, what? I'm coming with you.
Ah, finally, some sense. I've seen enough.

I know when I'm beaten. You...
What? Beaten? Yes. What do you mean? You know what he means.
Okay.

Right, fine. Come on, then.
It's been fun. Yeah.
What a hoot.

Bye-bye, Irene.

Right, come on, let's go. Let's go.

What the hell, man? Is it- is she a mind-reader or something? Is she just

she didn't do anything, she didn't even flinch, she just stood there throughout what I thought was a bloody good performance, to be honest. She just stood there, yeah, like a statue.

In the meantime, you and I are flailing about all over the place, and nothing. Nothing.
I mean, I mean, maybe I hammed it up a little, just a smidge, but sprinklers were going off, alarms, you know?

She just

stood there.

Yep.

She just

stood

there. So everything alright, you stuck on a loop.
Is this a new stem I need to warn the neighborhood about?

Right, actually calling Tom Gregson, telling him it didn't work.

She didn't move. Yes, Sherlock, we've established that.
Come on, done with this. So, so, so done with this whole nonsense.
Hi, Tom. John, what's up? I know where it is.
Bye, Tom. What?

You what? The drive? Cerberus at the gate. She.

Guarding.

She was guarding.

She didn't move. Sorry, what have I just witnessed? Stagecraft, Watson.

Stagecraft. Where are you going? To get some rest.

We have a big night ahead of us. Wonderful.
Bloody wonderful.

Has anyone got a towel?

Any of you, firemen? No?

No towels?

Great, lovely. Soaking wet bus journey.
It is

fantastic.

You don't need AI agents, which may sound weird coming from ServiceNow, the leader in AI agents. The truth is, AI agents need you.
Sure, they'll process, predict, even get work done autonomously.

But they don't dream, read a room, rally a team, and they certainly don't have shower thoughts, pivotal hallway chats, or big ideas. People do.

And people, when given the best AI platform, they're freed up to do the fulfilling work they want to do. To see how ServiceNow puts AI to work for people, visit serviceenow.com.

Check your home with blinds.com. La la la la la la la la la.com.
TIY or let us install.

Funna la la the blanks.com. Free design consultation.
Free, free, free, free, free, free, free.

Plus, free samples and free shipping.

Head to blinds.com now for up to 50% off site-wide plus a free professional measure.com. Rules and restrictions may apply.

This episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Do you ever find yourself playing the budgeting game?

Well, with the name Your Price tool from Progressive, you can find options that fit your budget and potentially lower your bills. Try it at Progressive.com.

Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates. Price and coverage match limited by state law.
Not available in all states.

Ah, here he is. Hey.
Hey, Tom. John, how are we looking? He knows.
He knows what? Where it is. Where what is? The way to Amarillo.
What do you think? Do you want to get arrested again?

Ah, there's no need for that. You hurt my arm, and I know it was you.
There's no need for the sarcasm. Oh, all right, the drive.
Yeah, he knows where the drive is. It's in her flat.

I know exactly where in her flat as well. Sorry.
Where are you, Sherlock? I'm illustrating a point. Okay.

What point is that? That your hard work, or? Knock, knock.

He is under the floor. I am indeed.
Mind out the way.

Hello. Well, it's nice to see you're enjoying yourself.
Ah, William Ormstein. Holmes, has our Prima Donna arrived? She has.
Wonderful.

The Royal Opera House is kindly cooperating with us. In what sense?

If.

We cooperate with them,

the performance will be shown in full.

Sorry, what? It's a full house, D.I. Gregson.
Don't D.I. Gregson me! Once the curtain falls, the arrest may take place.
She'll just leg it! She's here. You'll have officers backstage and in the wings.

What if she jumps through your little trap door there? Then by all means, put some officers down there, too. Hmm.

When's her character done?

Is she on at the end? We don't have a chance to grab her earlier. No, her character nurtures Mimi as she does.
Yeah, what? Irene plays Musetta.

The final scene is just as important to Musetta as it is to Mimi. She's no longer the comic relief.
We're just some flirtatious, dramatic,

emotionally manipulative character in a sparkly masquerade mask. She sacrifices her glamour.

She sells her earrings to buy Mimi food, and she's by her side right at the end when she takes off her mask and she kisses.

Sorry.

Yeah, sorry. She does this.
I have no idea if that answers my question or not. She will be on stage until the very end.
Where will you be? Her boy Prince is at the Childminder. Irene is here on stage.

So the flat's empty. That flat is empty.
Do you need any assistance getting in? Do you want the police to be responsible for breaking into the home of a single mother? Nope. Thought so.

Leave us to it. We'll do.
Yeah, yeah. Let us absorb the heat for that one.
Great. Cheers.

Exactly. There will be no heat.
Not when I win and she loses.

The game is nearing its end.

Victory is close. We win.
Right. Yes, we win.

Off we go, Watson. Time for the final act.

Right, yeah, cool, cool. Uh, Mariana, have you got the extra mic? I've got it.
An extra mic? What for?

Well, I've got to be with Sherlock for the drive, but I don't want to miss her getting apprehended. Is this for your bloody podcast? Yeah, yeah.

See you later, Tom.

You, lot, are a total nightmare. A complete and total nightmare.
We're recording? Mariana, come on.

I really don't like the sound of my voice on these things. Oh, you've listened to the show? Yeah.

unfortunately. Oh, which one?

I don't know. The adventure of some bloody nonsense.
Come on, this way.

Come, Watson.

This way. Alright, alright, alright.
Slow down. Slow down.
I can't.

I cannot. Well, because you're too excited.
Well, yes, but

remember, we are not the only one that seek this prize. There is another.
Of course. Mr.
M. Indeed.
Yeah, and about 200 celebrities and corporate folk, I bet.

Here we go.

Okay.

What have you got planned this time? You know... Put some nanobot device through the letterbox that opens the door and gonna laser cut the windows so we can

or yeah, just smash the door open. Sure.

How long have we got left of this thing? Like 20 minutes or so. And that's her in the eye mask, yeah? Yeah, that's her.

Right.

I want eyes on all exits. How many we got backstage?

Five of us, Grigson. One of you, go in a dressing room now.

Roger that.

Getting tense now.

It certainly is.

Move that table out the way. I'll pull the rug.
Roger that.

Oh, come on.

Done. Let's get this rug out of the way.

Right, it's uh

it's not a trapdoor in sight, they. Why would it be a trapdoor? You said it would be a trapdoor.
Nobody said trapdoor. I said it was under where she was stood.
Yeah? The floorboards. Oh.

Trapdoor, honestly. Do you need a crowbar? No.
This has been removed recently a a number of times, as we know.

Screwdriver. Right, um, yeah, here.

Now, she's out there treading the boards all the while we're ripping up hers.

Any activity out there? Uh, let me check. Um,

sir,

not really, mate. There's a couple of neighbors looking out their windows, but to be fair, you did just smash a door down.
Good.

You're nearly done. Ever so nearly, my dear companion.
Ever so nearly.

Okay, that's it. That's the end of the show.

Finally.

With which they'll do their bows, and then the curtain will come down.

Volume, stand by.

Okay, he's given us a signal that stage guy. Yes, he's bringing the burden down.

Great. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, wait.
What?

Mariana.

At the end, when Mimi dies, she is supposed to remove her mask.

Oh my god.

You were right.

You seem underwhelmed. It's

it is what it is.

I don't know, I thought maybe it'd be bigger and heavier. History never does weigh much until you try to carry it.

This.

This is the weight of nations, Watson. The truth, like a drop of Jupiter, is both minuscule and massive.

Hey, yes, leptop, of course.

Get her off the fucking stage now! Rubbly tackular for all I care. No, no, no, Irene, Irene.

Hey, you, get Irene Adler off that stage right now. Hey, show's over.

The show is literally over.

We cannot. We cannot do it.
I do not for this.

Our password. Cerberus.

Yes.

Did

it work?

It worked. Okay, let me see.

I.

Why can't I?

What's on there? It's a video.

I thought.

I thought. Just shush.

I thought this was supposed to be a trove of data. It's just a video.
Enough, Watson. Let's play it.

Enough's enough.

Come on!

Come on! Okay, okay, it's okay, Irene.

My dear Mr. Sherlock Holmes, I hope your friends enjoyed Daisy's performance.
She's so talented.

Get off me! Irene! Just calm down! The show is over, and so is our little game. I nearly blew it there at the death, right?

I just froze guarding my goods, huh? That's not her.

That's that's Daisy. As you can see, the drive has been wiped and reformatted.
A clean slate.

A fresh start.

Daisy Norton.

What? What? First cover Mazetta.

Oh, God.

I need to call John.

And my boy will not be used by your media, hunted by your establishment. He won't be tortured by a life he could have had.

He will be a normal boy with a normal life and a normal mom.

And there will be no Milverton or Ormstein

or even Holmes to jeopardize that.

You or anybody else affected on that drive needn't fear me.

I'm happy.

I love

and am loved.

Feel free to release your episode, Doctor. I look forward to hearing it.

Lots of love. From me.

The woman who, up until this afternoon, used to be called

Irene.

She won.

The world moves fast. Your workday, even faster.
Pitching products, drafting reports, analyzing data.

Microsoft 365 Copilot is your AI assistant for work, built into Word, Excel, PowerPoint, and other Microsoft 365 apps you use, helping you quickly write, analyze, create, and summarize.

So you can cut through clutter and clear a path to your best work. Learn more at microsoft.com/slash m365 Copilot.