"Dax Shepard"

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Welcome to Smartless with Jason Bateman, Sean Hayes, and me, Will Arnett.

Each week, one of us brings on a special guest

and surprises the other two.

They don't know who the guest is,

which makes it fun.

And then we laugh and we get a little less smart-less.

So I guess more smarter, more smarter.

We should have needed more smarter.

Anyway, come take a ride on the Smartless train.

Smart less.

Smart less.

Smart less.

Well, you just congratulations.

You just had a baby.

That's pretty amazing.

It should be noted.

My partner had a baby.

I was, I didn't do it.

But you pushed just as hard.

I sure did.

I pushed her.

Yeah.

I was like, what are you made of?

I was like the great Santini in the delivery room.

Yeah.

Yeah. I just had a baby boy, littleny that's incredible just last night yeah so crazy do i look tired you do so way to way to way to hang in there with your girl you just thought you'd pop over for a podcast huh well i mean somebody's gotta pay the doctor bills do you understand we don't have health care in this country.
Like, I'm just. Are they both still in the hospital? Are they both? Yeah.
Yeah. Wow.
Yeah. And where are you? You're at home and doing a podcast.
That's great. So you got a pretty stiff deductible, I guess.
And I had to come home and sauna and cold plunge first. I mean, listen, this chassis, as you would say say jason it's no fluke okay no i actually as you guys know i was a little late getting here i all of a sudden i stood up and uh i was like babe i'll be right back oh my god raced out and jumped in the car drove home got on here doing this and i'm and i'm gonna be right back at it.
But I just actually came from feeding him myself. He took a little extra in the bottle, and it was just unbelievable.
Wow, that's so cool. Yeah, I'm talking about Jason.
Yeah, no, I got it. I got to look at him.
He looks like he's about to poop any second. I think maybe I should probably have like a lift, some sort of like a, isn't there a thing where you can kind of like cinch up your forehead a little bit and lift your, lift your, your brow back? Interested when Ed Begley had the eyes because he had alpicia.
And then I turned his eyebrows on upside down. And I go, God, you look surprised.
And he says, Oh, do I? Sorry. I must've put my eyebrows too high.
No, no. He said, I think I put my eyebrows on upside down.
Guys. I'm super excited about our guest today.
He's a, he's that we know we all know and we love very much he's originally from the suburbs of detroit and this i didn't know graduated magna cum laude from ucla and anthropology what i did not know that and i've known this man for a long time he's been very successful in everything he does. Andy Richter.
Movies, TV shows,

to his marriage,

to being a father,

to his own podcast,

from which we could all

learn a thing or two.

Dax Shepard.

Yes.

I love this man.

He's one of my besties.

One of the kindest,

smartest people I've ever known.

Dax Shepard, I got it.

Today on Smart List,

we have with us

the amazing Dax Shepard, everybody.

Magna cum.

Hang on a second.

When you said magna cum laude,

I knew that

because I'm not jealous

of the fact that he's Thank you. Got it.
Today on Smart List, we have with us the amazing Dax Shepard, everybody. Magna cum.

Hang on a second. When you said magna cum laude, I knew that because I'm not jealous of the fact that he's got it.
It fills me with so much joy because one of the things about Dax is you look at this son of a gun. He's got an attitude.
He's got the cutoff shirts that I love. He's got the guns.
He's got the whole thing. And then this motherfucker is sneaky smart like you wouldn't believe.
wait a second dax how come you didn't let us know me know ever that you graduated magnical that that seems to be like something you might lead with yeah from ucla under promise over deliver boys wait wait i have to write that down get the guard down get the guard down chauncey gardner it and then sweep in and get all your women. I'm kind of dead serious.

I'm really shocked.

Barney, your lady, although I've not met her and she's just with child, she's mine.

Jeez, I knew that.

It's cutthroat.

Is the kid yours too?

I don't want another kid for crying out loud.

No, I just want another bedmate.

If he wanted it, he'd take it.

Wait, are you dipping right now?

Hang on a second.

Are you dipping?

You're dipping.

You're chewing.

Dax is chewing.

Wait, do you dipping right now? Hang on a second. Are you dipping? You're dipping.
You're chewing? Dax is chewing. Wait, do you have chewing tobacco in your mouth right now? Let's just put me right on blast, four eyes.
Yeah. No.
Oh, sorry. You want to go down this road? You want to start picking fights, lighting fires? Magna cum laude and dipping.
Jason, here's where you could learn from Dx when i did dax's podcast he let me up there in his in his space he let me blow some darts and i was killing the butts and he never mentioned it on the air and he and then you he comes on here he's not on here six seconds before you're blowing up his spot wait is that a secret are you know are you supposed to like keep that quiet that? Well, I never knew that. I never knew that about you.
I think it offsets his magna cum laude quite nicely. Exactly.
And in the rare event that there's like 10 or 15 young men who look up to me, I find it hard to believe, but I certainly wouldn't want them packing a dip just to be like me. I'm not trying to promote that.
Now, look, yeah, do I have some bad habits still? Yeah, I've cleaned up a bunch of them, but there's some left. And this chewing tobacco, look, I'm on and off and on and off and in quarantine.
I'm all the fucking way on it. It's not the loose stuff, though.
They're bandits, right? No, no, I got a big, let me. Ew, look at that thing.
Have you ever swallowed it by mistake? Probably while drunk, drinking. Yeah.
Yeah, you know, out of an old beer bottle that I've been spitting in. It happened.
My brothers used to chew and would swallow and then throw it up. To manage their weight or? No, because they were probably drunk, yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. A lot of things happened.
That's what I loved about being a drunk, and I think a few of you can relate, is that you'd show up on vacation. You don't need a game plan.
Just have a couple of cocktails at the bar, and everything else presents itself. You meet someone next to you that you would never hang out with, but you're lit.
He's got to come to my bungalow. Great.
He's got these pills. Now we heard of a dance club.
You know, everything just happens. All you got to do is just get that first drink down and everything takes care of itself.
And in sobriety, when I went on vacation, I'm like, what, what do you go by the pool and watch other people pound cocktails responsibly? Right. Wait.
So, but what age were you when you started doing all that? Partying? Yeah. Yeah.
Well, I had a year in high school where I actually spoke to my mother and I said, look, I know dad's an alcoholic and everyone in the family's an alcoholic, but I'm going to need to find out for myself. And she said, I really wish you wouldn't do this, but I'm going to, I'm going to allow it.
But with the understanding that if it gets out of control, you promised me you'll listen to me. And I said, yeah, I can commit to that.
And then I was woken up on one Saturday morning because the local law was at the house on a Saturday morning and they wanted to speak to her son. And that proved to be the nail in it.
So I I then shut it down for my full senior year because I respected her. And then I went back at it when I graduated.
And then I did 11 hard years. Good for you.
Good for you for getting back at it, too. Because a lot of guys would have given it up and just thrown in the towel.
But this guy's got to get up and get it. He's got an engine on him that don't quit.
Yeah. Yeah.
I said, look, I think this law enforcement showing up at my house in the morning, that's got to be an anomaly. That can't happen again.
Now, Dax, I truly do want to know. I've always wanted to ask you because when you said you started this podcast, I don't know, two years ago, three years ago? I don't know how long ago it was.
Two and a half. And you were like, I'm doing this podcast.
I'm in my attic. I'm like, what? I didn't understand.
Like, what made you want to do it? I was a pretty regular guest on some of them. And the feedback I got, say, from Marc Maron, where dozens of dudes had stopped me over the years and said like, hey, man um, I listened to that episode.
Um, pretty often I got sober after hearing it and I always, I always kind of go back to it. Like I had had so many guys tell me that.
And I was like, uh, I don't feel that when I'm in a movie, uh, looking in the barrel over Don Johnson's shoulder. No one stops me and says that got me sober.
Although certainly someone got sober because of that. But I was just, I was really, really moved with the response of being a guest on like Sam Jones, Mark Maron, a few of the long form ones.
And as all of us have done, we're all comedians and we've all done a million talk shows. You know, that pressure to be in six minutes uh which is fun i love it i love being on talk shows um but i i wanted for like oh i'm i have more thoughts and i have more to offer and i i have a bigger story to tell and i want to do it but just again largely just enjoying being on the long form one so much and generally being open to being on people's and just always loving the experience.
I was like, I want to do this all the time. But do you miss, like, I've worked with each one of you individually for months at a time on multiple projects.
And one of the things I love, and it's probably one of the reasons I do this is because I love that experience. Not just doing the scene, but I love hanging out with guys like you and people like you and gals like you.
Like having fun and laughing. I've had some of my greatest experiences working have been with all three of you guys where I've had a great time.
Likewise. Do I – Oh, that's everything.
That's the whole reason to do the job after a while it's such a blast and and so and and and formed really great lifelong relationships with all three of you guys so it does that do you miss that part of it do you feel like alone or no well i i just shot you know 28 episodes of bless this mess and i'm also on top gear and i also host a game show so i'm i'm doing more than enough of that yeah i don't and in fact it's um yeah more and more with it when you just look at the amount of energy required and time committed and two kids and all that less and less do i want to be on a like scripted show that takes 65 hours a week nine months of the year it's just yeah it's it's less and less appealing to me uh you know all my all my acting aspirations are are gone uh in a healthy way what about your directing stuff though because you're a great director and you're able to to you know juggle a bunch of balls at the same time and guide multiple departments and and shape an experience for an audience is that something that you think you'll you'll return to i mean i recognize it's a bit of a time suck and you're super busy you know on the top of the hill but um you know do you see that sometime in the future um because you did you used to say how much you loved it i it. There is nothing more fun than when you're in production directing.
To me, it's the closest thing you can get to doing cocaine with kind of no downside. You're just, when you're there as an actor, as you guys know, you're like, when are we getting out of here? I arrive and I ask, when are we getting out of here? As a director, the thing flips entirely where it's like, how long can we stay? I want to shoot, shoot, shoot, shoot, shoot.
And maybe we could add this thing. And just that flip of wanting to be there and wanting more time and the control.
The control of solving problems as they arise. Because there's no game plan for a movie.
Unless you have 130 days like Tarantino and you can sit around and wait for the sun to be where you thought it was going to be X, Y, and Z. You know, Bateman, you do it all the time.
You map something out. You got there.
You guys got there three hours later. The sun's now in a different spot.
You're now shooting on that side of the street instead of this side of the street. And I love solving problems.
So I love going, okay, well, how can we make this work on the other side of the street? That's very stimulating for me. So I love it.
Do I love editing for four months and then testing over and over again? I fucking hate that. Do I love promoting and getting tracking for fucking two months, knowing you're just going and promoting for no reason and it's going to tank.
All that stuff, the risk-reward is just unappealing to me. Currently.
That part of it's dead, though. I'll bet you that part of it's dead.
It is. You're so right.
So would I want to write a pilot and shoot the pilot? Yeah, I think I would like to do that. seems like something that would be manageable and then the you're not so dependent on the the studio to promote it and all these other things uh but yeah just the heartbreak of like two years and then you and then your whole life's decided on a friday i just don't need that again it'd be like for me you know having a boyfriend that kicked my ass and going back to that why would i do that to myself the two and a half months of shooting isn't worth that to me i last year as a mantra as a mantra i would be saying your opinion's not needed here like just as a everywhere i go your your opinion is not needed here because i think everyone must hear my opinion on all fucking topics and it's just just, these people are doing just fine when I'm not around.
Guiding in with my genius. Right, right.
How do they make it without you? Yeah. Yeah.
I think Chris and I have both said that to each other in fights. Like, do you think that I just arrived here, like, by accident? Like, I was doing plenty good without you.
I was eating and taking dumps and showering. Everything was, the bills were paid.
Right. Yeah.
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And it was very uneasy and kind of like, you know, I had a hard childhood too, as you know, but like, yes, but why talk about that a little bit and like why that was unstable for you. And what did that drive you to do or not to in your adult life? Like, how do you, and by the way, was comedy and escape from all of that as well? Did you like, I got to get out of here.
The only way to deal with this is drugs, alcohol, and laughing. Sorry, and Dax, B1, this is a 14-pronged question.
Go ahead. Well, I was just going to say, I'm going to parse this out.
I think I heard why are you a comedian and why are you an alcoholic. So let me try to sum that up.
Oh, so I'm coming through loud and clear then. Yeah.
And you guys are five-hour episodes? This is going to be a two-parter. Special two-parter special yeah because i just i want to plot out my answer i want to come i want to land the plane in under three can i just say before you start can i just say before before you start your answer can i just say i because i don't think it came out enough how goddamn happy i am the dax is here yeah it such a fucking joy.
I've just, I don't know if you heard Dax.

I had a kid, my son was born yesterday.

I had a newborn.

And I'm sitting here with three of my fucking old timey pals.

And this feels so goddamn good.

And I'm so happy it's you.

Go ahead.

I love that.

Listen, all the love oozing out of this softy new dad.

I love it.

I wish I could face you right on the mouth.

How masculine is Arnett? He just can't have have a girl like you and i can only have girls exactly and this guy's on propicia and still making boys nothing but testosterone coming out of him that was my explanation for having all girls i'm like it must be the propicia i'm on hydroxy testosterone i am on nothing but propicia all right. If you kept going, you'd have a fucking football team on your hands in no time, Arnett.
It's crazy. Anyways.
An entire police force. Okay, so look, I have a genetic predisposition.
I come by it honestly. A lot of shepherds were alcoholics.
I got some uncles that shot each other. A lot of my in prison.
We're all from northern Kentucky that migrated to Michigan.

So that's the gun. And then what loaded it is, you pointed out, was, you know, lots of stepdads, some physical violence, some sexual abuse.
And then a penchant for fucking fun-loving life. So, you know, just a thrilling, but I would say probably the biggest catalyst was with the absence of a father figure giving me approval, I sought it with reckless abandon from my peers and my peers were all about how hard could you party? How could you fight? How far could you jump a motorcycle? How long could you wheelie? And I was like, sign me up for all these.

I want the masculine credentials.

I want to be a man.

And I did all those things. It should be noted that you probably did those things more than all those people who challenged you to knowing Dax.

Well, all those things happened at the same time on some occasions.

Show up lit on a motorcycle to the bar and start swinging.

So you can dovetail them all into one explosion. And then, yeah, unlike you gentlemen, you know, I was auditioning for 10 years in L.A.
and could not get a job, couldn't book a commercial. And that was rough.
And, yeah, Booz was a nice little vacation from that. Hard to see everybody around you kind of, especially you were at the Groundlings, which is kind of like Second City and all of the other improv classes.
Hard to be around all those other people who are like booking stuff left and right. And you were in the Groundlings with Melissa McCarthy and just all these huge names.
Yeah. And I would go home and I'd pop on the TV to watch basketball.
And all of my classmates and peers were selling auto insurance and fast food. And they were all just quietly making like $70,000 a year doing commercials.
And I instead was driving cross-country for General Motors to make ends meet. Which I'm sure they were jealous of.
They were so jealous. They were like, how many hours are you in that car on the weekend? I'm like, around 72.
I think I even blew by Bateman and his buddy on their infamous ski trip in that van. Now, all right.
Now, listen. Wait a second.
Wait a second. no.
Leif Garrett? It was a 40-foot bounder, not a van. How dare you? I'm sorry.
Was it Leif Garrett? Oh, God, have I never told you this story? Give people context, yeah. Come on, yeah, give us context, Bates.
I tried to get it all out of him on my podcast, but it was too dangerous. So maybe on his he'll feel empowered to tell us the truth.
You got to, you have to now. In his retelling on my podcast, there's just some gaps in time that he has no explanation for, but we all know what the fucking explanation is.
I think we went down a rabbit hole about wiping techniques. I think that exhausted our time.
Oh, I heard that, yes. So Leif and I were buddies because he- Leif Garrett.
Yeah, he was dating my sister, and I just thought he was just the coolest thing in the world. And then they broke up, and he and I stayed friends, and I was thrilled about it.
And he was a great skier and knew his way around a bottle of booze. He admired his skiing prow.
No, this, this guy, this guy's it. Um, and, uh, then I pitched, uh, I wanted to just take them away.
You know, I wanted them all to myself. So I said, Hey, how about, how about we go on a, on a ski trip, Angel? And he said, uh, he said, great.
So we rented a, um, uh, a motor home, um, stocked it up with all you can handle. Read between the lines.
Yeah, we put two mountain bikes on the roof so we could travel from the RV parking lots into the main town, wherever we'd go. And we plotted a loop.
We went north from Los Angeles to Mammoth. Then we went to Tahoe.

Then we went to Jackson Hole.

We went to Sun Valley.

We went to Aspen.

We went to... You went to a lot of places, yeah?

Utah.

We don't need the itinerary.

Well, but...

You put some miles on it.

But that's significant, right?

Where'd you gas up in between?

I mean...

Oh, so we took a couple of weeks.

I would say the beauty of this story is in the details, Bateman. Okay,'t scare us any.
I love every one of these stops. I can't do any more details than just destinations.
Mostly because I can't remember. Once we turn the rig off, things got a little cloudy.
It should be noted, as hardcore as that is, and you guys going on this trip, or you're filling the RV full of party supplies and stuff, the nerd element is, and we had the mountain bikes, so we could go from wherever our destination into the town. Like, what, nerd? And that's a new development for me.
Can I tell you, what I thought when you originally told me there were mountain bikes involved and skis, I was like, God bless these guys. They're doing some downhill mountain biking.
Like, I assume when they come out of elevation and it gets warmer, they're in Moab, maybe the mountain bikes. No, no, it's drunk.
No, no, this is a kayak shy. No, it's a, it's a winter trip.
So we're riding these mountain bikes in the snow, pretty lit up. Um, so it, it, uh, it was tough.
Do you remember my first follow-up question when you told me that story privately? I do not. I said, if, and how often were and Leif both making love in the same RV at the same time? It's close quarters.
I bet I had a pretty colorful answer for that. Listen, this is great.
And I love, thank you, Dax, for saying make love. Good for you.
Yeah. Yeah, this is a couple of thrill seekers, romantics.
They're on the road for God knows how long. Not a fuck trip.
This was beautiful mountains and making love and rivers and light snow. Good for you.
I want to get back to life stuff because I love it and I wasn't there in this story so I'm kind of, my God. Okay, Sean, I'll spice it up for you.
Any dudes come in that fucking RV? Finally, finally. Jesus, God.
All of a sudden, my earphones just popped up a little bit. Trust me, you guys are seeing, you guys know, when you work with Sean, it's like, yeah, your line, your line, your line.
My line. Right.
Your line, your line. Everybody else talks.
Thank you for teaching me that well. So obviously the four of us have been friends for a super long time and know everything about each other or almost everything about each other.
I didn't know about the Magnum Cool Out. But for the people listening who don't know, like you're one of the funniest people I've ever known, Dax.
And like when you were going from house to house, stepfather to stepfather, like for me, I didn't fall into the trap of drugs and alcohol like the three of you did. Not yet.
So it's not a competition. So not yet.
And so my true escape, my nerd escape, was Saturday Night Live and comedy because it made me, if I could laugh or make other people laugh, it made me feel euphoric. That was my corny, dumb, nerdy drug

because I didn't do drugs, right?

So for you running around doing all that,

who were your influences and who did you watch

and was comedy as much of an escape as a drug

like it was for me?

Okay, so what I love about this is

I'm juggling three balls

and I'm juggling Sean Hayes

and Bateman and Arnett and it's great. Which hand am I in? You're in the air right now.
You're in the air. But to answer your question, so what I like about it is I'm clicking back from sincere to getting roasted.
But to that, I would say the other element was I was severely dyslexic and I went to the learning disabled room for an hour a day and they knocked on the door and they basically brought me and the other guy out. You can imagine what he looked like.
It was demoralizing. And yeah, my defense for that was I was funny.
But I think now that I'm older, I really recognize it's control. Every one of these things is control.
Why I like cars and motorcycles, it's all control. And why I like comedy is control because I'm in an awkward, we're all awkward.
We all have social anxiety. And I have this thing where I could take charge of the whole interaction and I could steer it and I could do something and get a predictable outcome.
And I loved that predictability. I think my childhood was largely unpredictable and sometimes dangerous.
And just having a sense of control of my environment and the people in it, that's what appealed to me. A lot of comedians will go like, oh, I just love the joy of making other people laugh.
Not me. I like control.
I like predictability. I'm not that uh altruistic yeah i get that from you well then that sets up well for what you're killing right now right and i want to talk about that i mean i think it is incredible awesome fantastic news that you're just right up on top of the mountain with what you're doing with with your podcast i just and and you know we're three morons trying to see if we have any idea what the hell we're doing in this space so i want to try to pick your brain a little bit and try to keep it entertaining about how we try to do this half as good as you're doing it but just i i do want to say i've told you privately i want to tell you publicly i just i'm so happy for you with how incredibly successful your your podcast is and and do you like the dynamic of of the control of that where you you know who the guest is what the questions could should be what the angle is going to be and then kind of pivoting inside of that and trying to be a little bit flexible yet still in control i mean is that is that, is that an, it's an appealing thing I'd bet.
Yeah. For sure.
It's, it's like, it's downright euphoric when it goes well, when you really do not to get corny, but you, you can reach a state of flow in this. It happens to me all the time where, you know, I interviewed Yuval Harari and they're like, well, he's got to leave in an hour.
And I was like, like okay and then all of a sudden i saw the person like signaling us he had to go and in my mind i would have bet my children's life on the fact that we had been talking for 12 minutes yeah and an hour had gone by and i was like oh my god that reminds me of you know other other aspects of our work where that can happen it happens to me in the editing room right where it's like you're so hyper focused on this thing and all of a sudden you're like oh my god i've been editing for six hours that's crazy or you know i think any i get that on the motorcycle track anytime i'm present i'm not worrying about what dax needs in the future or what i don't have now as soon as i escape that prison of my brain i'm really really happy and I enjoy it. And yeah, there is this great sense of, it's not unlike acting too, where it's like if you get into a scene and it's really sloppy and things are changing and you're reacting.
And then all of a sudden some magic kind of happens. And that to me, the podcast is like, it's two hours of my favorite aspect of acting.
Like, can I listen? Can I respond? Can I elevate this? And, um, and, and I, I have found it, um, you know, I directed three movies and the whole goal of directing a movie in theory would be that you're going to let someone in on your point of view, how you're processing this world around you. And yet you're confined by the three-act structure

and you're confined by the rules of Aristotle and poetics.

There's all these things you're confined by.

And then I realized on the podcast, like,

oh, I sit down for two hours.

You're in my fucking point of view.

If there was ever a fast pass to my point of view,

it is that podcast.

And it's what normally takes me two years to do.

And I don't even succeed when I make them.

So has it made directing and acting less important then?

I've been... to my point of view, it is that podcast.
And it's what normally takes me two years to do. And I don't even succeed when I make them.
So has it made directing and acting less important then? I mean, you're getting satiated with this, yeah? Yeah, you know, what's funny is I heard Joe Rogan about five years ago say he had no desire to act. And I, as a cynical piece of shit, thought, oh, that's bullshit.
He's just not getting asked to act anymore. And that's his story now.
And now I completely, I totally believe him. And it's not that I don't have a desire to act or anything.
It's just that, yeah, this is fucking incredibly fulfilling. I don't have to get hair and makeup.
I drive to my guest house above my garage. There's so many elements that are heaven about it.
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Pick up Doveman Plus Care dry sprays at your local Target or Walmart today. One of the things that's really great, this is more sort of an observation, and I bet the other guys will back me up on this, is that you are a guy who's very, very interested in the world around and you're very interested in other people and how other, what other people's perspectives are.
You're often blown away when confronted with somebody else's perspective. It's really cool to watch you and be like, wow, this motherfucker thinks this? That's crazy.
But not bad. More like, that's wild.
That's not how I looked at it. And you hear that when you talk to people.
So, well, one thing was, I don't know if you guys watched that Michael Jordan documentary. It's hit me on that.
Yeah, it's great. And it's hit me a couple times.
To say I watched, it's not fair. Like I fucking injected it or something.
It's so great. Do you remember the part where the guy said, Jordan wasn't the best, fastest runner, the best shooter or whatever, but never has there been somebody who's been more in the present moment than that guy.
He's always in the present moment. And I think that that's what you're kind of touching on, that desire to be.
I understand that. And I understand to the extent that I'd love to be able to connect with it as much as possible because when I do, it feels so fucking good.
And that's what I hear coming through from you, like that desire to be right there in that moment, like you said, when you're on the motorcycle track or doing the podcast, right? Like that's the kind of zone you want to live in. Howard Stern does that really well.
There's a sincere curiosity about other people's perspective and really stays engaged in his conversations with people. You do that incredibly well, too.
Yeah, and I got to tell you, so two things. One, I just want to give full credit to AA.
The whole reason I'm any of the things you guys might compliment is from AA. 15 years ago, you would have liked me.
I almost was a blast at the party, and I would have fought for you guys, but it would have ended there. You wouldn't have asked me to help you do anything and expect me to show up.
So I give all credit to that. And then also I just want to say as far as the podcast and as far as you guys are concerned, I asked Chris Hardwick because I had him on early, and he's obviously done tremendous in this.
And I said, what advice do you have for me? And he said, you know, the less and less I prepare, the better I am. He said, because inevitably, if you're trying to lead someone to a story, best case scenario, you'll hear that story.
Great. But you already knew that story.
So there's limits to your engagement. You can only be so interested in something that you already know the outcome of.
And it's palpable. And he said, you know, be flexible.
Let the thing go where it goes don't try to steer it you know um have some flags planted but but you know really be open to what can happen and uh the more the times that i get into a state of flow is like the piece of paper uh vanishes you know i mean honestly you should come in prepared enough that if the person's a fucking dud, you can walk them through it. But also be, be soon as you get that green light, that there's someone that can run, then you just fucking join them, you know? And to that, who do you think, maybe you don't want to say, but, but, but can you think of a person who was potentially the biggest surprise in the sense of where you thought it was going to go and where you ended up was there one person who stood out to you is like wow yeah well well well first and foremost my mom that was my favorite interview i've done so far because you know she's not she's not in the public eye she's never been interviewed and for her to tell her personal story succinctly and so powerfully was like i was at you know I got to ask her questions in that interview I never a even thought to ask her and then b maybe would have been nervous too but the time was right and it happened and so that was that was like a very profound experience but dude dog the bounty hunter dog the bounty hunter who we all have loved on television we've seen him run through those doors with the industrial can of mace he's got his whole all of his kids there's so many kids you know the whole thing's great it's great entertainment he shows up and dog has got a humongous bandage around his thumb and he has been uh bit by an actual dog at the starbucks next to my house minutes ago.
So right out of the gates, I'm like, Dog the Bounty Hunter was just bit by a dog, you know, seconds ago. And he's here with this fucking makeshift bandage.
So that already I loved. He came upstairs.
His wife had only died three months ago. And he just went right at that.
He must have cried six times. I started seeing, like, oh, this dude was the sergeant of arms of the Devil's Disciples motorcycle.
That's not Hollywood bullshit or fucking rap stuff. To be the fucking sergeant of arms of the Devil's Disciples, you've got to kick ass.
And I'm looking at this guy, and he's the sweetest, most beautiful guy with a fucking terrible stepdaddad and his whole life is about been building this armor this outward armor to say don't hurt me because I will hurt you back and I was like I love you and I relate to you and I'm doing the same thing I've done the same thing always and we're all man we're all we've all had babies you you pick them up and they're fucking. And then they just get injured and injured and they create all this stuff to protect themselves.
And I just, I don't think I ever felt so, I related so much to a guy as Dog the Bounty Hunter. Do you still feel like you have that armor? Like, do you still feel like you put that on to protect yourself? And if so, when do you drop that? I think less and less, and I would credit Kristen with this entirely, which is, you know, for the first Kristen...
Come on, Sean. No, I know.
Everybody knows. The only reason someone turned into this is to listen to Kristen Bell's husband talk about something.
Sean wishes we could have chyrons on the podcast. Can I tell you guys one funny story? I'm sending pamphlets out before each episode.
Go ahead. Yes, please.
Really quick, funny story about Colin Hanks and I. About two years ago, I got invited to be a judge on a cooking show, right? And it was a tremendous amount of money for three hours of work.
And I said, absolutely, I'll be there. I go there.
Colin Hanks is the other host. They've got us on this scissor lift that's got to be four stories high, you guys.
And it is so wobbly. They've built like this stage on top of this scissor lift.
And then all the chefs are below cooking. And this thing is swaying and rocking.
And I say to Colin, I go, I just want you to know when this thing collapse and we die the headline's gonna say tom hank's son and kristin bell's husband die in scissor lift accident by the way so so true but but you know that can i just say this that so like 12 years ago we do this we go this funny or die tour that will ferrell is doing with uh and adam mckay is like doing the intro him, and Will's performing, and then he's got a couple stand-ups, and one of them is Galifianakis, and who else? A bunch of guys doing Nick Swartzen and stuff, and Adam had to leave the tour for, like, a week. He got sick.
So anyway, so we were doing promo for this thing, and he goes, come with us. You're leaving.
We're leaving tonight, and you're coming. You're filling in for McKay for a week.
I was like, great. It'll be super fun.
So we go to like Penn State and we go to University of Rhode Island. There's like 20,000 people in these arenas.
It feels great. And I, Will goes out.
He does the intros first. And I'm just kind of his sidekick on the side of the stage helping him keep it moving.
We get to Boston College and, and it's packed, blah, blah, blah. And he's like, well, we're so happy to have you.
And here he is coming out. You love him.
Here he is, Amy Poehler's husband. And I come out, and I'm like, in front of all 20,000 of you, I'm like, you son of a bitch.
That's hilarious. That's funny.
Anyway. But anyways, yeah, so Belle had, you know, we one time were on our way.
Actress Kristen Bell. Princess Anna, Kristen Bell.
What if she didn't even earn her own title? So we're on our way to this place, and we've been together for maybe a year, and we're dressed up, and a guy threw this humongous drink at my windshield of my car. No.
On Sunset. Yeah, right in front of Chateau.
He was hammered, and he was, like, crossing Sunset in front of Chateau. There's no crosswalk there.
He had plenty of fucking time. I didn't slow down.
So then he realized I wasn't slowing down, so then he was like tough guy in the middle, just standing in the middle of the road. So then I went by him on the outside.
He chucked this huge drink. I thought the windshield had exploded because it was just, you know, glass and ice everywhere.
And I thought the windshield was blown out. So that, that thing exploded in the e-brake was up and I was exiting the vehicle before the car was stopped.
And I this guy on the sidewalk and, you know, he was screaming, I'll sue you and the whole people at that magazine stand were, like, looking and they missed the part where he fucking threw a glass at my car. So it literally looked like I was just beating the fuck out of a random guy on the sidewalk.
No jaywalking. Vigilante jaywalk enforcer so i get back in the car and my hunch is that she didn't love that you know i know enough that that wasn't great for her uh but god bless her she didn't say a thing and um we get to this restaurant it was right before the soho house opened but they had it you know running and uh she and i had hurt my leg pretty bad because when i kicked him i i hit his head on my shin and i had a huge egg on my on my shin and uh and she was aware of it and i was kind of limping as we got out of the valet and so she said she had to go to the bathroom she came back and she had procured me like a bag of ice and slid it to me under the table.
This is like a meeting with her representatives. There's other actors there.
And she's sliding me a bag of ice for my leg that I kicked somebody with. And, you know, afterwards we had a talk about it.
And I said, you know, thanks for not running me up the flagpole. I shouldn't have done that.
Blah, blah, blah. And she said, why do you do that? And I said, you know, I, I have a bully thing and I have a, I'm going to protect everyone thing.
And I, and I will never be a victim again. I have all this stuff.
And she said, you know, I just want you to know, it doesn't make me feel safer that you'll stand up for me. It makes me feel more scared.
Like when we go places, I'm afraid you're going to you're gonna be punching people and i was like wow that's the opposite outcome of what i'm trying to do like i want you to know that i will fucking go through 10 guys if they're saying something to you and she's like yeah that just doesn't make me feel safe and i was like well this is i've been telling myself a lie no one feels safer around me arnett you don't feel You're waiting for me to get into some shit. Sometimes.
I think it's funny. I love it when you mix it up with others.
There have been a few times where I was, where Dax, like, basically big brothered it for me, which is unbelievably great. Dax, how often when you're out driving around in Los Angeles are you driving aggressively, taking risks, breaking laws, not being irresponsible, but getting after it? This is so embarrassing to say, but 100% of the time.
I'm like the wolf in Pulp Fiction. Like, it's 20 minutes away.
I'll see you in eight minutes. My hobby in life is getting that Waze.
I have that same bad habit bad habit yeah i get that ways uh estimate of how long it's going to take me and for me if i don't beat that by 20 i i should throw my car keys in the trash i'm exactly i'm exactly the same way i live my life exactly the same way i i see that estimate and to me it says you're a fucking coward if it takes that it's like it name that tune. I'll beat that.
I'll beat that in two minutes. I can beat that in one minute.
I told you this. We talked about it when I was on your show, but two of the guys on this, Tyler, you and Bateman are the only two people that I know even in my life now that if I get in a car that I'm okay if they're driving.
You two guys are the only guys. Sean, you and I haven't driven enough to.
No, I'm pretty bad. Dax, wouldn't you love to do a remake of Against All Odds and do that race on Sunset that James Woods and Jeff Bridges did? Bateman, remember I told you I wrote the Daryl Hall show, right, that I sold to Showtime.
It was a false history of Daryl Hall's life. Yeah, it's a great idea.
Really? And I was going to play Daryl Hall. And then the whole, the whole world's fake.
Like you find out all the real meanings behind all those hit songs. And it's just insanity.
God, if you could get Schwartzman in a perm to do Oats. Well, whatever happened with that? Because I remember you telling me about that.
It ended up getting really dicey with daryl's giving us life rights so i became friends with him and he's awesome guy and i understandably he was nervous about you know i'm telling a history of his life but it's all insane but but bateman in the fucking pilot shot for shot the against all odds races in there in the same the same cars up Sunset. Literally, I wrote it.

I wrote it.

And my whole fantasy was like, I cannot wait to reshoot that fucking JZ.

Do you think you'd ever be able to permit that?

Like get Sunset locked down so you could shoot that?

No way, right?

Oh, it's so easy.

Dude, it's so easy.

True story.

We developed a pilot.

Thoreau and I developed a pilot for Don Johnson.

Justin Thoreau.

Justin Thoreau. Justin Theroux.

Playing a sort of... Jennifer Aniston's ex-husband.

Yeah, that's right.

For Don Johnson,

Tubs' partner,

we... To do

a thing where he plays this guy, he's kind of like a

Crockett, but later in, it was a great part, but we had

this whole segment

was the exact shot for shot

through the intersection of Beverly,

Glenn, and Sunsetset where he blows through.

Against all odds.

Against all odds.

Goddamn.

All roads lead back to against all odds.

Can we tell everyone our DJ story, which is one of my favorite show business stories ever?

Don Johnson, Arnett.

So Arnett and I are doing a movie with Don Johnson.

And a couple of funny things.

Look, I loved Miami Vice and Don Johnson's awesome.

But I'm not going toe of Don Johnson but Arnett is fucking he is his uh Joe Namath he well well look at Michael Jordan look at him it's over the line he is so thrilled that Don Johnson has landed like we, and he's, like, getting updates when DJ is going to arrive. He's so thrilled, right? And so Arnett gives him a real full-court press from the second he arrives.
And Don is cordial and nice, but even you would admit, Arnett, he's a little bit like, all right, bud. And then I'm kind of, I'm treating him like...
I came on way too strong. Fucking, yeah, the gates weren't even open when you were sprinting.
And I was kind of giving him the, you know, you're the hottest girl in school treatment. I'm just ignoring him.
And didn't he become obsessed with me, huh, Arnett? He was like, I want you to do a remake. He's like, if they ever do a remake of my...
He was talking to me about being being him about being him and i'm i'm incensed i'm fucking i'm rich it how dare he dax doesn't even care it's so great and then so at one point while we're shooting this scene and the scene is uh we're all in a church at a wedding and arnett and i are one pew behind don Johnson. And the shot is of Don Johnson.
But just prior to this scene, DJ pulls me aside because now he's mentoring me. And he says, you know how I connected with the audience on Miami vice, what my trick was.
And I go, no, what would you do? And he goes, I buzzed the lens at least once an episode, buzzed the lens. I go, hold on.
You would look right down the barrel of the camera. He goes, oh, yeah.
You glance it. You buzz the lens.
You pop in. And then you're out.
And for him, that was the recipe for success on Miami Vice. So I immediately tell Arnett this.
We're in stitches about it. The very next take, poor DJ.
He's acting his ass off in the foreground us bozos are about on the other on either side of his shoulders looking right in the fucking lens i mean we are target locked staring it was the craziest feeling because you know you're all your trainings that never look at that lens and we were straight in it for like six minutes and now we're laughing so hard we're like we're squeezing each other's legs and we're trying not to bust and we're just in the lens and it made the fucking cut. It's one of the greatest days of filming ever.
What is this film? Oh boy. When in Rome.
Kristen Bell. We'll tighten that up later.
That's not the point of that. That's neither here nor there.
Actually, you know what? Dax, a good footnote to that is that DJ and I have since become good pals. I knew it would.
I wore him down. You played the long game.
Does he ever bring me up? Of course. The one that comes away.
Of course. Of course he does.
You're the ex he can't stop thinking about. Oh, man.
I did love him. He's fucking awesome.
He's such a cool dude. And then we took Buzz the Lens, and we just ran with it.
You know what? I've said it on virtually everything I've ever done since then. I've always talked about buzzing the Lens.
I have heard that from you. Yeah, I like to grab a little glass every now and then.
I think a DJ. Dax, you used to always say, I like to throw a fastball right down the lens.
Sure, right in the barrel. Dax, as we wrap up, because I don't want to take too much of your time for your empire that you've built.
Let me say, as an aside, if Kristen ever gets sick of your garbage, call me. I think you're swell.
I think you're real swell. Oh, wait, you'll take me.
I thought you were saying you'll take her. Yeah, no, no, no.
I'll send Amanda over to Kristen's house and it'll be great. And we'll go on a ski trip.
Don't let him get you on a ski trip. Yeah, no.
Get me on a ski trip. Because what we'll do is we'll go north, we'll go to Mammoth, and then we'll head on up to Jesus.
So 395, U.S. 395.
Yeah, yep. Up in the Sun Valley.
Then we're going to take it over to Jackson. Oh.
But, Dax, we are so proud of you for your success in this kind of world that we're just kind of chipping away at. And we do look up to you and are so honored that you joined us today.
And not only as one of our closest friends, but as a mentor to this world we know nothing about. And so hopefully we can learn from you.
And we love you so much. And thank you for taking the time and your busy schedule.
I know you're taking over the world. Love you, Dax.
Love you, guys. Love you bye daxels say hi to kristin it never ever gets old no he's the best you know my god he's so open and so uh not afraid to be vulnerable and everything i mean i don't know what he hasn't revealed yeah and it's not a bit either it's it completely sincere.
You can tell he really likes who he is. He's truly comfortable in his skin.
He's always had incredible charisma, but I think he, he said that he's never been better or that since he's been with Kristen, she's made him better. And he, he truly, he was great back in the day, but even now he's just, I, I was sincere.
I hope he felt that I was sincere when I said if things don't work out with him. For sure, of course.
That he can call me. He's such an authentic guy.
I should have left my number. No, no, no.
But he's such an authentic guy. One of the things I think that you guys will probably agree with me on is we've known him for a number of years, and you see him, he's gone through different stages in that time, but he's always been really honest about where he's at,

wherever it is that he's at.

Always. That's so great.

Always, and I think that's why he's successful.

Yeah, now we see him in this place,

and you can see that he is truly happy.

So you believe it because it's true.

It's not a bit, it's not an act.

And he's found a medium and a format that truly embraces

and takes advantage of his best qualities.

I'm thrilled for him.

Great guest, Sean.

Thank you.

Nice going, Sean.

So good.

All right.

Well, until next time.

Hey, guy.

Nice potting with you.

See you tomorrow.

Oh, I like that.

Nice potting with you.

Nice potting.

Okay, bye, everybody.

Bye, you guys.

So much fun.

Love you guys.

Love you guys.

Bye. Bye.
Bye. Bye.
Bye. Bye.
Bye. Bye.
Bye. Smart.
Less. Smart.
Less. Hey, friends.
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