"Who Knew Christmas Needed a Jew?" - Original Song from "The Jew Who Saved Christmas"

Wait, what's happening? Christmas feels different. Something feels new.
The snow is wider and so much brighter. And it's all because of you, Noelle.
Wait, are you talking about me? I've roasted all the chestnuts, killed all the Christmas geese, but it's been so monotonous, delivering world peace. Suddenly through your eyes, a brand new view.
Who knew Christmas needed a Jew? Ish, we prefer Jew-ish, but I think I get what's going on here. Your next miracle is to be all Barbara and sing.
I've whistled all the carols that could ever have been sung. Chimneys I've been sliding down have given me black lung.
Wait, what? I've been sliding down chimneys all friggin' night. Look, I no longer have the soot flu.
Who knew Christmas needed a Jew? Okay, if you think I'm gonna join you in some dorky little ditty, then you are absolutely correct. I've spent every Christmas eating Chinese food alone.
The dark house on the block, that's what they used to call my home. But with you, I think I finally got my shot.
Christmas needed a Jew who knew a Jew needed Christmas. Okay, sorry, I don't have like a magical Weed Given song gift.
I can't like improvise rhymes on the fly. Oh, that's all right.
I'll bring all the jolly. And I'll bring all the oi.
We fit together perfectly, this Hebrew and this goy.

You lit up my yuletide log, and it's burning bright.

The sleigh is not the only thing that's

higher than a kite.

A holly jolly mitzvah, yes, it's true.

Who knew Christmas needed a you.

Yay.

Boy, that felt right.

That felt right.

Wow.