Cincy Fails Burrow, the Boring Eagles, Guess the Lines, and Crawford’s Brilliance With Cousin Sal
Host: Bill Simmons
Guest: Cousin Sal
Producers: Chia Hao Tat, Eduardo Ocampo, and Steve Ceruti
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All right, live here on a Sunday night here with Cousin Sal.
Won the Emmy tonight for the pit.
You're in that show, right?
You're not in the pit?
I didn't win for the pit, but I did bet on the pit.
So that was a nice little payout.
And definitely better than Pitt, the team pit today.
So, yeah, always bet on the Emmys if you can.
Makes it such a better show.
People love the pit.
The only person I was happier for than Noah Wiley was Julia Libman, who was Noah Wiley's number one fan.
Never gave up on him
through the years, through all the made-for-cable movies and terrible straight-to-video movies he was in.
Never gave up.
You know, I'm going to sidetrack here.
You know, our friend Fat Jake Lentz, who wrote on the show the first few years, right?
Jimmy Kim Alive, he is a consultant on the pit.
Is he really?
Yeah, he's one of the doctors.
He left writing to become a doctor.
Very, very, you know, it's a common career path.
And he's now a consultant.
Like, he's like a full-time consultant on that.
So he's a consultant on the pit, and he's the therapist for our friend Brad Mulcahy.
Yeah, he does that.
There's two jobs.
He's in the Navy, too, or something.
He does a lot, yeah.
Well, speaking of therapy, JJ McCarthy might need one after tonight.
We'll do Falcons, Vikings quick because it was
pretty boring, but the Falcons look good.
The Vikings only scored six points.
JJ, so House and I took the Falcons in 107, and part of the reason was JJ had a kid on Thursday, Monday night comeback win, kid on Thursday, thrown into the fire Sunday night.
Just seemed like a lot.
But
what were you the most impressed or unimpressed by tonight?
Well, i it upsets me now that to know that jj mccarthy hates his kid right that's the only what can we take from that otherwise no i'm mad you and house played it perfectly i took atlanta and the over and they put the over on a teaser is there anything worse than like you got all these points that you don't need and then you take the over but i think that's going to happen i'm going to look at mvp odds i don't think mccarthy jumped up any you think you think he popped down no it's still allen jackson and love um i'm like the east coast right now i can do a live bet on fan duel tonight if you're if you're what you want me to oh let's get it in yeah yeah i'm 40 gambling is legal god bless it
i tied 47 different football bets to terrence crawford last night it was really exciting and sadly only half of them won um that's what happens i don't know it's uh yeah atlanta's better maybe the nfc south in general is better than we give it credit for a little bit maybe i don't know um and then uh yeah could the so the falcons should have won last week against tampa we both thought, right?
Probably.
They did not.
They won convincingly today.
And I was going to ask you,
the seven NFC playoff teams, if you just pencil in Green Bay and Philly right now,
maybe Detroit-Tampa Rams, we got two spots left, and we have the Atlanta, Seattle, Washington, Minnesota group.
Okay.
Which two would you like?
Because I actually like the way Atlanta played in those two games more than Seattle, Washington, or Minnesota.
I don't know what it means.
It's going to be a long season, but I didn't think they were gonna be in that conversation before this season, but now I do.
Yeah, well, I know I didn't like Washington going in, right?
I did like Arizona, but let's just laugh about that and put it to the side for a second.
But I think I can't wait for that.
Out of those teams, probably Atlanta and Seattle, I would say.
I think Seattle could probably hang with a lot of these teams, right?
That's what I had.
And I think, so we were trying to sketch it out before, well, I'll wait till we do the I give up.
We have a section later called I Give Up, but there's a team I had in the Detroit spot that I do not think is going to get there.
Falcons defense today, six sacks, two picks, three fumbles for us.
Recovered one of them.
Zero TDs allowed.
And some playmakers, a slate, Kyle Pitts revival tonight, slate.
Like Collinsworth even got sucked in and it was like watching somebody date the girl that you don't, all your friends like, yeah, you got to stay away from it.
And Collinsworth were like, ah, the Kyle Pitts, maybe he's put it together.
It's like, no, Chris, no, don't fall for it.
But he was, uh, he was pretty good today.
And the Falcons, they have some weapons, man.
I have to be honest, I had the Emmy audio on and I had the game underneath it.
So I didn't hear Chris.
I'm guessing it was, oh, Mike, JJ McCarthy just doesn't have it tonight.
But did you see that dress Sidney Sweeney was wearing as a presenter?
I may need some time to myself.
Let's go to the commercial.
Say it in.
He talked a lot about bottle feeding versus breastfeeding.
Oh, did he?
And yeah, you missed it.
Yeah, it was all in the audio.
It's going to be a big question.
Listen, I don't love when, you know, guys take six months off for paternity um but maybe you get two days maybe maybe your emotions are all skip week two yeah cars and went it's okay we'll get you i mean you could have the backup could have lost 27.6 whatever it was after your first child and we did nothing by the way we're just in the room yeah i remember even going to visit visit you actually for i think your second child and the and we're just like we're useless podcasts with you while my wife was in labor and i came back like
like 12 minutes before she started pushing it was almost a disaster for me.
We're there to be like, does anyone need a soda?
Yeah, right, right.
How are you feeling, honey?
Yeah.
Are you okay?
Like, we're, and meanwhile, we're like working the TV.
We're doing nothing.
That's it.
But with that said, I was still felt frazzled for a couple of days.
It's a, you know, pretty gigantic life experience.
It's weird to think like you would then just go right onto a football field wherever it's trying to kill you.
Yeah, emailing all the relatives, it's exhausting.
Yeah, of course.
Take the best.
Now you have group texts.
Back then, you could, you know, it's a little different.
All right.
I'm done with the Falcons Vikings.
Let's get to the biggest story of the weekend.
Joe Burrow got hurt.
Yeah.
Turf Toe.
I was watching when it happened.
I thought it was like his knee or as Achilles.
It was the rarely seen quarterback turf toe injury.
And it seems bad.
And it's going to be a big story tomorrow, like what the diagnosis is.
Was this a bigger National Football League injury for you or fantasy football injury?
Well, I don't have to pick one or the other.
If I don't have them, it's an NFL, right?
That's an easy question.
But just for ramifications, because it's not like the Benches were going to do anything dramatic this year.
Right, right, right.
Yeah, no, I still think it's NFL.
I still think it's NFL because, you know, fantasy, you could get, well, you can get a lot of guys to replace Burrow and get the three points, four points less a week, whatever.
But yeah, when they brought him off, I was like, oh my God, looks like he got
both knees shut off in Vietnam or something.
What the hell's going going on here?
And then to find out it's turf toe, and I was like, what?
Turf toe?
He'll be back in the fourth quarter because I didn't really rule him out until like the beginning of the fourth quarter.
And then it's like, oh no, he's got torn ligaments in this from the turf toe.
And so now tomorrow he finds out if he wants to or has to have surgery and that that would spell the end.
I didn't get full details.
Was that it?
It said it sounded like it's three months.
Yeah.
If he does the surgery, which basically takes you to mid-December.
The good news is eight and nine might be the seventh seed in the AFC the way we're going.
So I could hang around.
And they do have a backup.
I know he had three picks today, but Jake Browning, we've been here with him a few times and he can make throws and he can get it to those guys and he's feast or famine and you never can feel comfortable whether you're up 10 or down 10 when he's in the game.
But I think he's better than most backups.
I think they can still put up stats with Chase and Higgins.
Well, he's good.
I mean, yeah, he was good today.
That was a miraculous win and cover, right?
They were laying three and a half.
So to get it on the goal line and put it home.
His problem is going to be,
I have to see now, their next four games I saw.
So even if he doesn't get the surgery, he's probably out a few weeks at the Vikings.
All of a sudden, not as bad.
At the Broncos.
Oh, all right.
Wait a minute.
Earlier, this looked versus the Lions, at the Packers, and home against the Steelers.
I don't know.
This morning, this looked pretty daunting, but that's their five games.
Well, and they somehow ended up winning coming back from
jacksonville so
i wrote down this before he got hurt because i had that game in the multi-view i'm back on the east coast had to pick the four games had the ipad with four games on much smaller screens but it was since he jacksonville was one of the four because i had money on it i had jacksonville in the over
uh i had fantasy guys on both teams and i just thought it would be a really fun game and i wrote down like 40 minutes in that that burrow was just getting crushed like did you watch it
Every time he went back to pass, there were five guys back there.
They weren't even coming close.
And this is Jacksonville.
It wasn't like they were playing the 1991 Eagles.
And he was under siege.
And I have him in our guillotine league.
And I was watching it going, I wish I didn't have him.
I just, I'm really getting nervous the hits he's taking.
And then, of course, he gets hurt.
Yeah.
20 minutes later.
Now I don't, do not have him.
Yeah, yeah.
But yeah, they never fixed that, right?
For him?
Like, hey, why can't we just ever see him be great?
Can we see Joe Burrow?
We put him in the top four.
We think he could be interchangeable in the top three.
Will we ever get to see him be great because he's given a decent offensive line or two guys who can block?
It just seems from year to year, it's the same shit.
Yeah, it's not even, I mean, he would probably take decent.
This is, it's like awful every year.
I wrote down.
I was writing down really dumb analogies.
It's like being the biggest cocaine distributor in Colombia, but not having any security guards for the cocaine.
Oh, good.
Okay, thank you.
Um, it's like buying a million-dollar Maybach and just parking it outside your house with the doors open and the keys in it.
It's like, what's the point of paying Joe Burrow $50 million and then not giving him an offensive line?
It's so fucking stupid.
What are you guys doing?
Do you want Elanis Mariset to record this for you?
Maybe, I don't know what she would call it.
What could she call it?
Isn't this a coincidence?
Isn't this?
I don't know.
It's something.
It's like winning the Emmy, but
your whole staff is fired in a few months.
I thought you were going to say, it's like being nominated for an Emmy, but campaigning for somebody else in the category.
For Colbert.
All right.
There you go.
Let's get Alanis on the case.
Who is the seventh AFC playoff team if it's not the Bengals?
Because
I'll give you some choices.
Yeah.
Buffalo and Baltimore, I think we can pencil in.
We could pencil in an AFC South team.
Could you pencil in everyone in the AFC West, all four teams?
Would you put the Pats in there?
Could you say two AFC South teams?
Could we get Houston and Indianapolis as 2-0?
Like, I don't know.
I thought you had the seven seed as 9-8, right?
I think we both did before this.
I had the Pats going 9-8, which is maybe even conceivable.
And I had Vegas going 9-8.
I had two 9-8s getting the 6-7 seeds.
That's going to be a scramble now, like where we thought, like, maybe three teams are competing for that seven seed.
Maybe there's six teams competing.
and you know i know everybody wants to say the chiefs suck but
would you say the chiefs are better than new england right now it's probably close well the chiefs and we'll we'll hit them later but i i want to see what they look like in week 14 when they get their guns back right you know they just have no explosive plays right now i guess the question for me and we're going to find out tomorrow night what are we getting from houston this season Because all of us wanted to pick anyone else in that division and all of us kicked the tires on Tennessee.
We tried that.
I couldn't get there.
We tried Indianapolis.
They had that QB thing and it was Daniel Dimes or Richardson.
I couldn't get there.
And then Jacksonville, I just fundamentally can't get there.
You got there.
Yeah, I want to get somewhere else now, but I got there.
You got there.
Now you're looking to relocate.
Now you're calling for help.
And maybe it's Indy, but I think Houston tomorrow night, there's two games tomorrow night.
And Houston is the team out of the four playing that, like the Chargers, I think, are at least going to be pretty good.
Whether they're as good as they looked in week one, we'll see.
The Raiders are going to be able to throw the ball.
They'll be a 500 team and a little bit dangerous game to game.
Houston either their defense might be really good and they could throw the ball or they just might not be good this year.
And I feel like we're going to know tomorrow.
Tomorrow and then probably next Sunday.
They go to Jacksonville on Sunday.
So in the next
seven, eight days, whatever that is, Sunday to Sunday, seven days.
I think we'll know for sure.
Well, what do you think of Jacksonville?
Because
Lawrence, I was trying to think of a quarterback who's more terrifying inside the other team's 10-yard line for his own team, where you just feel like
anything's possible.
Strip sack,
pick, tip pick, hospital ball, perfect throw into the corner.
a great scamble, a scramble where he stiff arms somebody.
There's like 15 plays,
but it's probably going to be disappointing for Jacksonville is how it's going to end.
And they had two of those today.
He threw a pick inside the 10.
And then that last, that fourth and five, they're up three.
It's like under four minutes.
The book said to, I guess, go for it.
Yeah.
I would have kicked the field goal and made Jake Browning, who already had three picks, go the length of the field to try to beat me.
Maybe I'm nuts.
I've watched a lot of football in my life.
Maybe have the backup QB with three picks, have to go the full field.
And he is.
Just went for it.
Didn't get it.
He had just thrown an interception.
Like they could have put the game away.
I actually took my eye off the screen.
I was like, wait a minute, how does Cincinnati still have, how'd they get the ball back?
But I'd love to blame Trevor Lawrence.
Believe me, he's been a disappointment for what I thought he would be coming in.
But
they dropped touchdown passes today on him, too.
They did.
That whole team just might be, you know, from the owner up or down.
They just might be incompetent.
I'll use that word.
There's some Brian Thomas Jr.
controversy, which I'm following because he's on a couple of my fantasy teams.
There was an alligator arms play over the middle.
Yep.
He dropped the last play of the game.
There was another one.
And
on social media, I went to the Jaguars' Reddit page to read what they were saying.
And they weren't happy with him.
The coach was asked about him.
This is how I found out about it.
Somebody put the clip.
They asked Liam Cohen about, what'd you think about the effort on Thomas?
And he's like,
well, I guess I'll have to look at it later.
I don't really know yet.
Like, didn't defend defend him at all.
It was just weird.
So, Lawrence threw him a hospital ball in the preseason.
I really like BTJ.
So, I just, and I happened for whatever reason, I happened to be watching
either it was a replay or something, but he, and the reason it stuck out, it was like it's their best guy, and it's a preseason game, right?
And then in the, in, in the game today, I just didn't think he was impactful.
This is a guy going for 40 plus in fantasy, right?
Yeah, I had, I loved him today.
I bet him to get it to score a touchdown.
He scored 10 touchdowns last year, right?
He was definitely a difference maker, you know, like
sniffed around at the offensive rookie of the year last year.
To me, it's like Travis Hunter, what are they going to do?
I mean, you pointed out last week, did he have nine offensive snaps?
Was that it?
Was that all he had?
He couldn't have
a ton more this week.
He only had the big PI today, which I didn't think was a PI.
Right.
Did you?
No, I didn't.
I just, I don't know if he's going to be a force offensively.
And if he isn't, that doesn't change the trajectory of this team from last year.
No, and I think when we were doing the pods before the season, we were like, this is one of the great X factors.
You have multi-view and Travis Hunters on the screen and get to see.
And he just hasn't really jumped out the first two weeks, which is fine.
He's a rookie, but they traded a bunch of shit for him, including their first-round pick next year.
I don't, I hated the trade when it happened.
I thought they gave up too much.
And you're giving up what they gave up.
It either has to be for Abdul Carter or it has to be for, you know, a potential franchise QB.
I don't think there's, I just don't think a two-way guy when we haven't seen it for 35 years, I don't know.
Just didn't like it.
I think
Otani ruined everything for all the sports.
Everybody's looking for the next Otani.
I think you're right.
It's probably not Travis Hunter.
Wait, I had one more thing from that.
Jake Browning,
is there,
who's your number one backup QB right now?
Coming in cold
in the league right now that you feel pretty good about?
Is there anybody that tops Jake Browning?
Is Jake Browning the ceiling?
Let me see.
I mean, he's pretty damn close to the ceiling.
Just going through your head.
Is there anyone?
No, Giants, Cowboy, no.
I would have loved to have said Cowboys.
Lions,
Jimmy G.
Jimmy G?
Yeah, jimmy g-ish maybe
his ceiling might be and no trey lance i'm just looking at these guys it's not i'm telling you man there's not many come back cousins i was thinking about like cousins
how many teams he would make better at this point but um yeah because we know what he can do but we also saw him speaking of alligator arms throwing uh 14 mile an hour spirals yeah not great well tough times for the bengals and i think it's time to do the depressed fan base rankings oh
so I think Bears are number one, and we're going to go into it.
Panthers, two,
Jaguars, three, Jets, four.
If I gave you that list, would you disagree with that order?
Well, Bears, Panthers, Jaguars, Jets.
I guess you're saying the Browns are in a class of their own.
Can they be depressed anymore?
Like, can the Browns fans feel anything?
Are they just dead inside?
Like, they have no expectations for this year.
Right.
Can you be depressed when you expect to go two for 15, two and 15?
I don't know.
Yeah, they're just zombies at this point.
I think you're right.
They probably should just take all the seats out of the stadium and let the zombie fans roam however they want throughout.
They're zombies.
That's all.
Yeah.
They're like the two people at the end of centers, just kind of wandering the earth at night, just trying to listen to jazz music and not see the sun.
I think Bears are one because they were real expectations this year.
They had this number one pick in the draft where they get the supposed franchise guy and he's just been awful and there's already been long pieces about uh how prepared he was during the season that big piece tyler dunn wrote uh two weekends ago and he looks about as flustered as any qb we're watching I'll give you Bears one.
The Vikings are just for a different reason.
I think you got to get them in the conversation because
there's so much difference between what kind of team you're getting year to year.
You get the 13-win team, then you get the rookie quarterback.
I'm not bringing in the history, though.
I'm saying right now, people, fan bases that went into this season,
and either, yeah, yeah, yeah, and they were either like they had their hopes up or they were optimistic for some reason.
I would say, right now, Bears and Panthers.
I mean, the Panthers are a little different than the Browns because deep down they were hoping maybe it would be a little bit better, and it's not.
It's really bad.
You could just be right, though.
I might be underrating the Browns.
Yeah, well, we can go by over-underwins in terms of expectation.
And I think the Bears had the highest, what were they, seven and a half, eight and a half?
What were they?
Yeah, eight and a half, right?
So I think it's the Bears probably going away, actually.
Where are the Dolphins on this list for you?
Oh, man.
I guess they're close, too.
They have to be tough.
Actually, they should probably be higher because they were booing in the first quarter.
Yeah.
Like they had, they
had a
pick or they missed the third down or something.
And it was like they were loudly booing.
It's 95 degrees at like one o'clock on a Sunday in mid-September, and they're fucking furious.
They should.
Their fans are like, hey, we got so many better things to do.
We're in fucking Miami.
We're going to be at the beach.
Did you feel like that?
That was a weird game.
It had a lot of ups and downs.
I felt at some point, I think it was late third quarter, that the Dolphins actually took control of it.
And then your boy jumped in there.
Good for you.
I got to watch it with my dad.
Nice.
We were pretty disconsolate down the stretch there because
if the Pats lose that game, the season's over.
Yeah.
They're owing to that's a team that you have.
If you come out of the gate and you lose to the Raiders and the Dolphins,
you're done.
But the real problem is they played really well in the first half.
Kicker missed two PATs.
They drove every time they had the ball.
They had these nice drives.
May, I thought, was terrific for him.
And they just, and you just look up and you're like, we're up by a point.
What's going on?
And then Tua seemed like he was gaining confidence as the game was going along.
We lost another cornerback.
So we were down on debacs.
Right.
And our our linebackers in space against these fast Dolphins dudes.
Like, I like Spallane, but Spallane got caught with A-Chain a couple of times, and it was like a nightmare.
So it just felt like Miami was going to win.
Then they get that kick return or the punt return.
And it was like, you had to be fucking kidding me.
We lost this team.
Like, their fans were booing for an hour and a half.
Yeah.
And then Gibson returns the kick.
And then the Pats almost fucked the game up again.
But
Tua just,
he just doesn't have it.
He's just not good enough.
I've been saying this for three years, but he's just not good enough.
Well, he's a tough watch, right?
Obviously, we have Dolphins fans, friends.
JJ just lives and dies by it.
I'm not ready to blame him completely this year.
I don't like his style.
I feel like he has to get that interception at the end is basically because I can't get hit.
I can maybe throw a better ball if I took another quarter or second, but I can't afford that.
So I'm going to let this go right now.
I got to dump this.
Yeah, but their defense is really bad at times, really, really bad.
Like his numbers, he was 26 for 32, 315, two touchdowns, right?
And that interception.
So there's other places to place the blame.
But yeah, I just had three interceptions.
Oh, yeah, three incompletions and three interceptions.
Right, that's true.
Yeah, that's what it was.
26 for 32.
Yeah.
But I mean, you know, their longest play, he threw a moon ball to Hill.
He underthrew him by 12 yards.
Right.
And our D-back overran it.
And Hill ended up getting it.
It felt like Hill was open constantly.
He overthrew Hill in the fourth quarter.
And that was the play that went around on social media where Hill was just like, you had to be, he was open by 10 yards.
Right.
But I thought the Pats, May made the best play of his career when they really needed it.
Big pass rush on a third down.
Rolling right.
Miami had all the momentum, and he hit Ramondra and that like delayed wheel route and just put it perfectly in stride.
Yeah.
And it was just like, that's why the Drake May believers, like I had multiple people like Nate Tice texting me like, that's it.
That May see here here.
I just thought he was really good today.
I love him.
And
the left side of the line, according to the grades, Will Campbell and Wilson, the other rookie, were excellent.
So
there's signs of life with this team.
I think, you know, when they can get Gonzalez back, if he's ever coming back and they're able to cover a little more, the D-line was good.
They shut down the Miami run.
I don't know.
They might be able to
cheat their way to 8, 9, 9, and 8, not cheating the Belichick way.
This is exciting for me.
They'll probably get around to doing that too.
But this is perfect.
Like Drake May trades off week to week being great and horrific.
It keeps the podcast fresh.
You're not talking about Sacramento.
I've never waivers in the playoffs.
You know, I've never wavered.
I've never wavered.
I said you were depressed.
I didn't think he was that good at that.
Well, he wasn't, but you're like, we had Ted Williams and we had this and we had
that.
Yeah.
All right.
That's what I mean.
He's every week, though.
This would be great.
He was good.
And I thought it was nice to have the McDaniels.
Somebody texted me on how it was like putting on a nice old jacket, the dopey McDaniels offense with like these little screens on third down and, you know, these little quick outs and all the little dopey stuff that he does.
I thought, here's the thing.
It was an incredibly entertaining game.
Yeah.
And at the very least, they're entertaining this year.
And by the way, the Jaguars are too.
There's a couple of teams that like, they're not that good, but at least they're going to be fun to watch.
I think the Jaguars are fun to watch.
Dolphins,
we blew this last week.
We were talking about nicknames for Mike McDaniel.
Yeah.
There were some good ones.
Well, we forgot.
Lombardi nicked in the DJ last year.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
DJ Mikey Mack.
That was the nickname.
He's spinning his hits.
Yeah.
Well, he could have a couple of nicknames.
I mean, Shaq has like six.
Yeah, that is true.
Yeah.
We get around them.
So Dolphins are 0-2.
And they play Buffalo on Thursday night.
That Buffalo, yeah.
Monster.
And 0-3 is a death sentence.
You're not making the playoffs after 0-3.
That's our first cross-off.
Maybe we have a special podcast Friday morning to commemorate it.
Big ceremony.
I was going to do this later.
I'm ready to do it now, though.
Oh, really?
Because I thought,
well, so you think Miami?
Because I think Carolina has to be in there too.
I would say Carolina and Miami are the two cross-off leaders.
Like even the Saints, I think have been relatively frisky both games.
Like they easily could have stolen either overtime or maybe even a win, even though they're not that good.
But Carolina.
They're the same team.
Like, they'll screw up your cover.
And that's kind of it.
And then, you know, count on three to five wins otherwise.
I would not cross off Miami yet just because of the 9-8 East.
I would cross off Carolina.
I think they're really bad.
Arizona, that was classic.
Arizona has
everybody and their brother has them in an eliminator or a money line parlay or a tease or whatever.
They go 27-3
and all of a sudden it's 27-15.
I didn't even know it was happening.
All of a sudden, Carolina had the ball and it was 27-15.
You put it back in the multi-view,
and there, you know, my dad is still trying to figure out this whole multi-view universe.
He's like, what happened?
We had that game.
I was like, well, I took it off.
It's kind of elder abuse, what we put our parents through when we start doing four boxes and switching shit on.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
He, the thing he asked for was to put the audio on the Pats game because that helped him concentrate.
That's fair.
Yeah, I can easily do that for you.
I'll tell you what happened.
Fourth and 16 happened.
Freaking Bryce Young came back from the dead and converted fourth and 16.
And then they score just with nonsense.
And then they get the onside kick.
And I'm like, oh, good.
I'm like, you know what?
Good.
Now that they didn't cover, because we had them in Ringer 107, me and Dubundo, I was like, I hope Arizona loses.
And then I look at my losing ledger of bets.
I'm like, shit, I have Arizona money line on like four games here.
And then they get the onside kick.
And it was a miserable, miserable drive after that on-side kick.
Really bad Carolina.
Yeah.
I like McMillan.
He's jumped out to me the first two weeks.
I wasn't sure about that pick.
It seemed pretty high for him.
And those big receivers, you never know.
But he's been
a couple of times a day where he's jumped off the TV with some with some plays.
So
that team needs.
A lot of work.
Let's take a break for the podcast.
We'll keep going on the YouTubes.
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Let's play I Give Up.
I told you to write down some things that you're just giving up on after two weeks.
They could be a future bet.
They could be a team.
They could be a player.
This is fun.
They could be anything.
So what was the first thing after two weeks you've given up on?
I've given up on trying to enjoy Chiefs games.
They're not fun to watch unless you're enamored with the Taylor cutaways.
They're just way more exciting teams to watch move the ball, including mine, including yours.
I don't care how many wins we end up with.
I think it's time to give them 1 p.m.
kickoff slots.
Take away the full dose of primetime games that they have.
They have like six.
That's the most you could have.
It takes them 11 minutes to score.
And, you know, when it's a dozen play drive, some dumb shit happens like Kelsey did, like hits off his hand and interception the other way.
At the goal line, I mean, I was looking at this.
Three years ago, they averaged 29 points per game.
And the five years before that, they were anywhere from 29 to 35, right?
Since the three years, it's 21, 21, and 21 and a half.
That's gigantic movement.
Like, I'm not saying that's all Tyreek Hill.
I don't know what it is, but we could pick any team that scores 21 points.
Mahomes is just good enough to figure out how to win these games.
So
I just don't, I'm done with it.
I don't think I need to see him every time.
Give them the 10 a.m.
slot on the West Coast.
They don't need to be one of three games in the featured game on a Sunday afternoon.
Chiefs fatigue sounds like
now.
I remember when the Patriots, when my team was taking all the shit that they took in the 2010s and everybody got really tired of them,
the Chiefs have been way more in your face than the Patriots ever were with the tail, like Kelsey coming in today with the suit with the shorts on and all the wedding stuff and Mahomes.
And they have this giant documentary series about them.
And meanwhile, they're still playing
Andy Reid, all this stuff.
Like, I don't, the Pats,
you know, were winning and
maybe some people felt like we're cheating, but they were never like just bombastically in your face like this.
Well,
I'm more tired of them from that standpoint.
The other thing is that
they still scored.
I'm a defensive guy too, but the Patriots put up points.
Like, you don't go an hour without seeing them score.
When Randy Moss left the team, it wasn't like you went down from 35 to 25 points, right?
Like, Brady was still there.
It was enjoyable to watch.
I just can't watch these Chiefs try to move the ball up and down the field.
field.
Well, congratulations.
That was a great way to start the game.
I had them fourth in this exercise.
Okay.
My number one team, very similar to your case, is the Philadelphia Eagles.
I just don't enjoy watching them play.
And it's a lot of the same stuff you said.
I don't even think their fans enjoy them playing.
Like Shil Capadia, our friend who works at the Ringer.
Yeah.
He even thinks now like they're just trying to troll everybody by being intentionally entertaining.
He had a tweet about that today.
I fucking can't stand watching them.
That game was like watching paint dry.
I wanted to take it off the multi-view, but there were only three games.
There was nothing to replace it.
I would have had to do WNBA playoffs or something.
Your father's like, find more games.
What are you doing?
Like,
they threw deep to Devonta Smith once, and it was like, oh, something happened.
Yeah, right.
Otherwise, it's just like these swing passes to Barkley, these boring runs up the middle.
Every fourth and one, fourth and two, you You know, now I'm watching Australian rugby for a play.
And
I just don't enjoy it at all.
And I like a lot of the players in their team.
I don't like watching them play football.
These are two games in a row that I fucking snooze fest.
I'm on my phone the whole time.
That's a football game's happening.
Every team in that division is more entertaining than them.
I'm going to give a two-way to your 1B, and I give up trying to convince people that tush-push sucks.
You know, more specifically, it's not a football play.
As you mentioned, rugby.
it's fat guys shoving a world-class athlete forward um now it's worse than ever because everyone is so off sides the refs have no idea what to do right what happened with that we had the the broncos lost a game because of some ambiguous leverage rule on a field goal kicked i still don't even know what happened yeah and meanwhile the chiefs every time four guys are jumping forward before the ball snapped yeah the the eagles right yes
yeah i know everyone's on the refs have no idea and the guys on both sides are jumping it's like well eight guys moved early.
Ah, fuck it.
We'll let it go.
And it's a big one.
Well, they can't see.
There's 20 guys huddled together.
How do you even know it's happening?
It's humanity.
You can't see the ball at all.
It's idiotic.
My team's division rival, so I'm extra worked up about it.
But you know what would be worse if the if than just the Eagles being good at this?
If everybody was good at the tush push.
Think about how unwatchable football would be if only first and second down mattered and the big guys on offense can push everybody around on defense on third and three and fourth and one.
That would just go back to this not being, at one point, it was banned.
Let's ban it again.
Why do we have to wait for someone to get injured?
Who cares about that part of it?
It's important, but let's just get
is when
there's going to be some absolutely horrible injury, and it's then what then will be banned.
Um, I was trying to think of like another type of play that would be technically a football play, but would be as ludicrous to watch because it has no correlation with anything else we watch during the course of 10 hours.
And I decided it was on a field goal kick, if on the defense, guys were allowed to climb on each other's shoulders, almost like college kids trying to climb over a fence.
And you just had three guys climbed on shoulders and one guy had his hands up, and then they kept blocking kicks.
And we were just like, what is this?
This is, and now you had like the offensive line trying to knock the three guys standing on top of each other over and somebody gets hurt.
Like, that's kind of what the tush push is.
It's just not, yeah, it's not football, it's stable.
It doesn't look like it.
Yeah, I think I came up with an idea where imagine Christian McCaffrey sits on like two linemen's shoulders, right?
And they carry him like playing chicken, and at the last second, he lunges over the goal line, right?
From just like six feet up.
Like, with that, is that a play?
Is that a football player?
Or, or if, yeah, if McCaffrey
he had two linemen and they flung him like a single slingshot once he had the ball, yes, And they just flung him over the line like he was like a boomerang.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Technically, you could do that.
I'm telling you, if everybody got good at this, it would really ruin all of this.
Well, explain to me this.
Explain to me this, people who run football.
So leverage, which the Broncos game.
Now, if the Broncos game was fixed today, I apologize because.
It had all the elements.
I don't think it was.
But if it was, I apologize for what I'm about to say.
Yeah.
This leverage play.
set the scene the colts try a field goal they miss it colts try a 60 yard field goal it's 10 yards short and it's wide right it's like it it basically lands on the goal line um and the broncos win and then they're like no no no there was a leverage play this is after the broncos they've thrown a pick inside uh
you know inside colts territory and the 10 minutes left when it seems like they're going to put the game away then dobbins runs all the way down to the 20 with under four minutes left gets up and spikes the ball like a jerk.
Delay a game.
Next play, penalty, face mask on the tight end.
Now we're suddenly at the 40-yard line.
Of course, Lutz has to hit the goalpost.
Right.
So then we come down the other way and it all leads to the Colts with this fucking leverage play after the Broncos stop them.
Yeah.
And so here's my question.
Leverage.
This is apparently unsafe for the center.
because one guy leaned him down so the other guy could jump behind him.
Yeah.
What's the tush push?
But it's safe to have a running back get shoved from behind by his teammates.
That's not leverage.
Yeah.
So leverage is good or bad.
What is it?
What do we do in NFL?
Leverage is good.
It's good in almost everything, right?
You want leverage in contract negotiations.
You want leverage in relationships.
You want leverage in almost any situation.
If you're looking for a raise, whatever, they need to call it something different.
Call it like a cheat jumping or something.
But, but whatever you call it, the guy didn't do it.
He didn't, it didn't happen.
Do you think they could protest that and just be like, we lost and this was the wrong call with this?
Those things don't usually hold up.
And, you know, we can get into like how Steichen really ruined that.
By the way, he's the favorite for coach of the year right now
because they're 2-0.
But he didn't do him any favors kicking that 60-yard field goal unless he knew the leverage was coming.
Like you said.
Yeah.
That could not have missed more dramatically.
Awful.
Well, that was my next I give up was I give up with NFL officiating.
We had multiple games today, the tournament by it.
There were flags everywhere.
The Cardinals-Panthers game,
as the Panthers were driving, it was just flag, flag, flag, flag.
These, the Giants had like 14 penalties today that
the Patriots had, I think, 12 and still won.
It's just where we've gone penalty crazy.
I'm not really sure why, but I give up even getting mad about it.
Isn't it like that at the beginning of the year until guys figure out how not to hold and everything?
The worst ones were the leverage play and the hunter pass interference actually swung games.
Yeah, the leverage one is something you don't really see a lot, and they didn't need to call it on a 60-yard misfield goal.
What do you have for your next segue?
What do I have?
You know, I give up trying to figure out if Justin Fields is good.
I thought I had a good grasp going into this year.
Like, you know, he was like, you'll read it, all the stats, 35th in expected yards, 32nd in red zone, 39th, 315th in this.
And it's like, oh, wait, he's on the Jets.
All right.
He teamed up with his former wide receiver hookup from Ohio State, Garrett Wilson.
They scored 32 points versus what we thought was like a vaunted, you know, Pittsburgh defense.
And then a big fat Nada versus the Bills, who allowed 40 last Sunday night.
So he has a concussion.
I hope he's okay, but I am done judging Justin.
Can't figure it out.
Offense was awful.
And I actually thought they did a pretty good job for about a quarter against Allen.
Then there was this weird moment in the game when he got hit and it looked like he got a concussion or something.
He ran off and he took his helmet off.
Yeah.
And if you had Jets money, like me, hadn't already given up the game, you're like, all right, Trubisky's coming in.
I guess I have to leave it on the multi-view now.
But it turned out he just had like a bloody nose.
And then he came in and just completely crushed.
Right.
And I continue to think he's the best player in the league.
Oh, really?
I do.
I continue to think he's the best quarterback in the league.
Okay.
I thought you were talking about Justin.
Josh Allen.
I'm like, oh, I may have to change my thing here.
Yeah, Josh Allen.
But I mentioned all of this because today,
first of all, House and I took the Jets plus six and a half.
I put a little money in the Jets as well.
And maybe you need, this is where you need like a betting conciliary or just need, you know, how Fandel will shoot those ads.
Like, you've been on the site for 52 minutes.
Reality change.
Maybe something.
Yeah, it was a good thing.
Maybe there should be an AI person that comes in and be like, we just wanted to remind you that you're betting on Justin Fields against Josh Allen.
And be like, oh shit, I am.
Why am I doing that?
I love it.
I love it.
Like, that should be the AI, what the fuck are you doing guy from Fando?
So you have to set it up.
I'm giving them that idea.
You have to set it up ahead of time.
Like, slap me in the face if I bet on Justin Fields.
Slap me in the face if I could cash out on this bet at 15 to 1.
And I'm instead waiting to see if this 48-yard field goal goes in.
It's like, don't be stupid.
Your computer or your iPad just starts vibrating.
Yeah, it's a reminder.
Yeah, it's got to be worse than vibrating.
I think you got to.
I needed it today because if anybody had said that to me, I would have been like, you're right.
What am I doing?
This is insane.
This is like, oh, I'm taking the Jets because the Bills are banged up in their secondary.
The Jets can't throw the ball.
Yeah.
I don't think, well, here it is.
We can't go on and on every week about how Josh Allen is number one.
He's my MVP and this and that.
And then just bet again.
We just, as long as like the weather is okay and everything, they're going to score.
I know they only scored 30.
They could have scored 45, 47 that game.
They kind of let the took their foot off the gas.
That's just where they are.
So if you think the Jets are going to score in the 30s, 40s, then fine.
But no, not even close.
Well, so how many points did the Bills end up with?
They had 71 points in two games.
Yeah.
Pretty good.
My next, I give up.
Travis Kelsey, I think I'm good.
He seems like a nice guy.
I know people who are friends with him.
No shots fired i'm just i'm good
i'm good i'm with the the suit with the shorts today uh he has the big drop and he makes two plays and he's doing like the wwe flexing and then of course the ball bounces off his hands for the interceptor for the biggest play of the game um he's one of the best tight ends i've ever seen he's not the best his wedding will be the His wedding will be the biggest wedding we've had since Princess Die.
I'm happy for them.
I'm a big believer in true love.
I'm just good.
I need a break.
All right.
I think you were probably on the bubble for getting invited to that wedding, but now you can forget it.
You're not going to be able to do it.
I don't need to be invited.
I just need a break.
You want a break?
I'm good.
Yeah.
I'm good.
Like how he broke every bone in Xavier Worthy's body, like a break like that.
That's the thing.
He's
probably cost him two games.
I'll say this, too.
He was one of the best guys in the league, but the tight end position is so loaded and great right now.
I don't think he's one of the best eight or nine guys I'm watching week to week.
Like the Colts have this dude Warren, who, for some reason, the Bears took a tight end 10th in the draft as the first tight end taken.
And it wasn't Tyler Warren, who looks like a cross between
Gronk and Bowers and Kelsey.
Like he's just a fucking beast.
But you watch like even like the Jags have that guy strange.
Yeah.
You know, you go, you go on down and it feels like everybody has like a tight end who can catch balls now.
And what Kelsey does doesn't seem especially.
I'll do you one better.
He's a podcaster.
That's all he is.
And there are probably
three podcasters who are better at football than him right now.
Amy Poehler,
Van Latham.
So let's see.
Yeah, Van could get in there.
Yeah, of course.
Let's rank him as what he is.
He's a podcaster.
That's all.
Yeah, we'll see.
Because unfortunately, they really need him these next 10 weeks.
You're not kidding.
That's another I give up, actually.
I just don't think it's going to happen for the Chiefs.
I have Chiefs fans of my life who are like, we'll be fine.
We'll be fine.
Trust the infrastructure.
Rice comes back week seven.
We'll get work.
We're going to get worthy back.
Like, we're going to be explosive.
And I see the case,
but I think the pass rush is not there.
And I don't know.
Like, you can explain the wide receiver part to me, but you can't explain why you don't really have a pass rush anymore.
Right.
I just don't.
I just don't think they have it.
And Mahomes, at some point with these long balls, all the stats from the past 25 games, like there's something really wrong with him throwing deep balls at this point.
He did connect to one with Thornton today, but he overthrows dudes three, four times a game, it feels like.
Right.
Well, I like it.
At least he's letting it go at that time.
Like, oh, good.
It's true.
40 minutes since we've seen you throw anything other than like a four-yard slant or take off for a first down yourself.
But so they're 0-2.
What do we think?
They have to go 9-6 to be in the mix at 9-8 to get a seed like that or 7.
9-8 gets them in.
They should beat the Giants this week.
So
we could come back to this.
They're not a cross-off just yet.
We don't.
Fandal doesn't have the playoff bets yet.
They don't have playoffs yet.
Yeah.
They do have divisions.
Divisions, right?
The Chiefs are down a plus 210 in the AFC West now.
Right.
So they were minus 110 to start the season.
They are plus 550 for the AFC.
And Mahomes is 20 to 1 now for MVP.
I mean, how is he even six now at this point?
That's weird.
That's weird.
Another Mahomes thing, you can't tell me this is good.
Mahomes has 123 yards rushing this year.
He's on pace for 1,000 yards.
There's no way that's good.
Why do I want him rushing for 1,000 yards in a season?
I don't want him getting hit ever.
Right.
If I'm the Chiefs.
He's definitely
taking off out of necessity for sure listen you can only pay the piper for so long in the nfl with this cap and trying to get lucky on these picks over and over again and it looks like the all those rookie offensive linemen and these young guys rookie and second-year guys um they're okay not great the defensive line it's okay it's not great um running back skill position guys it's really like a lot of synching on when rice comes back and rice is really good yeah look i I said this is, you know, we want to think of them as the Bills of the early 90s that scored a million points or the Rams, you know, that scored a ton of points or any of the, so
this year's Bills are the only team like that.
This is the Chiefs that can score 20 or 21 on average, and they're either going to get a little help from the refs or Mahomes is going to pull them out of a ditch in the fourth quarter.
Otherwise, they're going to lose a lot of these games.
You know who sounded really happy today?
Who's that?
Tom Brady announced in that game.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
He's like, assign me to more Chiefs games.
This is fun.
How many Super Bowls does Pat have?
Oh, three.
Yeah, yeah.
That's what I thought.
Do you think he has an app where he checks his legacy?
How much difference there is between these guys?
He's like, oh, yeah.
Good throw by Pat.
It's a nice job by him there.
You know, like kind of like slightly condescending with his announcing.
He's got a mute button where he's celebrating.
He's like, high-fiving everyone.
Another overthrow.
I would hit that guy.
0-2 teams.
So right now we have the Jets, Dolphins.
Are we done with the game?
I give up.
We give up.
We give up.
No, no, no.
We're coming back.
Just on the Chiefs really quick.
Yeah.
Jets, Dolphins, Browns, Tennessee, Kansas City, Giants, Bears, Carolina, New Orleans.
We have nine 0-2 teams.
This isn't a death sentence, but it's never good.
We talk about this every year when we're heading into week three.
0-4 Rams, the 24 Rams were 0-2.
They made it.
23 Texans were 0-2.
They made it.
22 Bengals were 0-2.
They ended making the AFC title game.
So
one of those teams,
Jets, Dolphins, Browns, Tennessee, Chiefs, Giants, Bears, Panthers,
Saints, one of those teams.
The Chiefs are in so much better shape than AALS at your name.
They just,
because they're the Chiefs.
And Texans, maybe.
Yeah.
So
you're going to be Chiefs or Texans if the Texans go into
one of those two.
Yeah.
One of those two, right?
It's easier now, though, right?
Because
no case for the Giants for you?
There's more playoff days.
I don't know.
If they play up my Cowboys every week, they'll get there.
They'll have 10 wins.
I mean, good God.
Major points.
What do you have for Aggie?
I got one more.
Yeah.
Complaining about quarterbacks trying to draw defenses from the shotgun, offsides from the shotgun.
I'm done with it.
These guys, it's fourth and half a yard.
And you'll see a guy line up in the shotgun and it's deafening roars from the crowd.
You need like Superman-esque hearing, outer body hearing to be able to hear the cadence instead of being on the ball and trying to get these exhausted D-linemen to jump off sides where like just a little head shake could do it.
What's with the shotgun?
Like, I don't know.
I don't care because I'm done complaining about it.
I just don't understand it.
80 cookies.
What's he saying?
Yeah.
But get up close.
You would scare me.
You're doing that on Zoom and I'm getting a little jittery.
But if you were right in my ear, right?
It'd be a little more effective.
I don't know how you're not over center if you're trying to drop people off sides i completely agree with you that's great point i have one more i give up go ahead
well i actually have two but we can talk about one of them later uh
daniel jones jokes
you're not done with those you don't give up
He's pretty good in those two games.
Yeah.
He really was.
I thought he made good plays.
I thought he had,
I don't know, I thought he had good command of the offense.
Taylor was great.
Taylor really seems like he's 100% back.
I mean, he's got to be one of the three best running backs right now.
I don't know.
I thought he was all right.
He definitely...
You know, for a guy whose career seemed over last year, it did not seem over in these two games, including today.
Wait, wasn't he better than all right?
Denver's defense is supposed to be good.
It was top five in the first place.
No, that's what I'm saying.
He had top five.
He's trying to be calm
because it's Daniel Jones.
No interceptions.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
He was legitimately good in that game.
I don't want to give up the jokes just yet, but if he has a great running back, I know he did in Barkley also.
I also wonder if Brian Dayball could get fired just based on Daniel Jones' performance on the Colts, like having nothing to do with what the Giants do this year.
Like if the Colts go 12 and 5 and the Giants goes.
I mean, he got 40-something yards out of Wilson, though, who's half dead.
Yeah, I know, I know.
Well, that's not going to continue.
It seemed like a good breakup.
Yeah.
i'm not ready to give up on caleb williams was the only other guy i had in there but i i did want to ask you
right now
how many 2024 nfl draft qbs would you take before you took him in a draft yeah let's hear him
well you tell me oh all right
uh well go with uh
who was who was the second guy in that draft hold on i'm i'm queuing it up
i should have had this no it's all right It's Jaden Daniels.
Oh, Jaden Daniels are taking over him.
Would you rather have Drake May or Caleb Williams?
Come on, man.
Come on.
Come on.
Let's go the other way.
Who's taking Caleb Williams over Drake May?
That's ridiculous.
I say Pennix and Nick's, both them.
So you take Nicks over Caleb Williams.
Yeah, I think so.
You would take Pennix over Caleb Williams.
Yeah, I don't know about Drake May.
You sure this kid's good?
Why are you doing this to me?
What's their record?
It's probably the same.
I don't know.
He finally got protection today, and he was excellent.
Right.
All right.
So that's basically
the draft.
A lot of them, yeah.
No, there's other quarterbacks in that draft.
Well, I think it was just six, right?
Oh, that's the first round.
Yeah.
Oh, McCarthy.
Yeah, McCarthy.
McCarthy, not yet.
Would you rather have Rattler or Caleb Williams?
Caleb Williams.
Okay.
Although I want Rattler around.
I do like betting against him, money line, at least.
Would you rather have Florida Florida State's Jordan Travis or Caleb Williams?
Hopefully, Caleb will be fine, but it's pretty grim.
That's why I didn't want to put it in I Give Up.
But it's,
he has a couple plays a game that just look like when you're watching like a bad college game, and Sean McDonough's like, oh no, yeah, one of the, he has a couple of those passes.
This has to be one of the more depressed evenings for Ben Johnson, right?
Like,
I'm annoyed I didn't, we didn't, I didn't convince you us to bet the Lions over 27 and a half points or whatever it was, because this was the FU Ben Johnson game, right?
So if they were ever going to break out, it was going to be this one.
I guess that would be an I give up because I give up on my Bears playoff prediction and the bet I have on them.
I think out of the teams,
I try to take a couple swings with the picks, and that's the only one that feels dead already.
Because I had Seattle.
I thought Seattle was good today.
We'll talk about them in a second.
Pats, not giving up on that.
Vegas, but the Bears doesn't look great.
The Lions aren't going away.
I think I put them at a four when we did the Panic Meter thing last week.
I think I put them at a four.
They're still going to be solid.
So now the Bears are going to be.
Well, here's the thing.
Green Bay might be fucking awesome.
So that loss in week one doesn't look as horrible as it did in the moment because Green Bay is the best team in the league.
You know, and they're playing the Bears.
It's a little...
Listen, that Micah Parsons trade crushed crushed the Cowboys and was not good for Caleb Williams.
Those are the two entities that really suffered.
Well, you wouldn't have been able to pay your cornerback who's already out.
Right, right.
That's true.
We wouldn't have been able to do that.
We're not going to be able to pay our kicker.
The kicker is the one we're going to, Jerry's going to have to
back the truck up for.
Oh, yeah.
We'll take another break for the pod.
Keep going on the YouTube.
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Let's talk about your team.
So,
I wrote down, you know, because you have the uniforms, and It was a high-scoring game, and it was
the icons on the screen where it's like Cowboys versus Giants.
So it feels big, but it's like those, when you go on Amazon and it's like, it's a new movie with John Trabolta and Bruce Willis.
And you're like, oh,
oh, that's probably not going to be a that.
Did that come out in 22?
They're cops?
What?
So mean.
So much meaner than what I said about Trake May.
So mean.
Oh, it's like a straight-to-video movie.
It's basically Cowboys, Giants.
See the Cowboys, the Giants.
These are cover Kevin Spacey's, the bad guy.
They're not the real band.
It's just cover bands playing each other.
Yeah.
Oh,
it's really depressing.
I wish it had been a tie.
The highlight of the game, though, was you have the ball, you're over midfield, and there's nine seconds left.
And there's time to really try to get into field goal range.
And Schottheimer does a handoff left for three yards to set Aubrey up on the right on the left hash mark from 64.
Right.
He's like, like, no, no, no, we got, we got him.
And then Aubrey fucking nails it.
And I'm like, what am I watching?
I've watched 19 people at Miss PATs today, and the Cowboys are setting up 64-yard field goals and draining them.
I love Greg Olson, but today he was like, when Javante Williams gets that carry, they have nine seconds left and a timeout, and he gets a carry and immediately trips forward.
And it's like, well, when you know, when you get the ball like that, you don't know what nine seconds is.
Like, yes, you do.
Yes, you do.
You can get six yards and then like call a timeout if you're on the quick out.
Yeah, right.
Exactly.
It's like, I know everybody, oh, Brandon Aubrey's going to make any kick he tries.
All they have to do is get to their own 30.
It's like, no, even the 64-yarder barely made it.
Can we get to a decent spot?
But yeah, that was a miserable.
I mean, I just early on, I was like, okay, my team sucks.
So when your team sucks, you just want to win certain games, right?
You want to win home against the Giants.
You have to win that.
I'll take four and 13 if I can get out of this somehow with a win.
I promise I will.
and it was just a matter of what's going to happen first is russ gonna throw for 500 yards or are the giants going to amass 500 yards and penalties it was that sloppy a game
14 penalties for the giants 54 first downs in the game yeah you had 31 or 32 almost a thousand yards in offense
and uh some genuinely nice russell wilson throws Definitely.
The neighbors was unstoppable.
Now, you don't have any defensive backs anymore, but he was all running amok.
That's a problem.
I thought it was very entertaining.
I enjoyed it.
I thought the announcers were good.
I thought,
you know, but it was two teams that combined how many wins Cowboys and Giants combined this year?
12?
10?
Oh, yeah.
That's
just nine.
Yeah, well, they have to play each other again, so that's going to be one.
They could tie.
They could tie that.
It was close enough.
Yeah, it's bad news.
It really is.
I don't know.
I was happy for you.
You didn't want to be O-N2.
No, I didn't want to.
i was texting my buddies i'm like i take a tie right now i like oh i will take a tie probably four different times i said i'll take a tie but um well it felt you know what it felt like the last night the netflix the undercard fight mobility against uh yeah martinez right and these guys are just beating the shit out of each other for 10 rounds it's like they always call these like the rock'em sock'em robot fights gotta ward yeah just
a thousand headshots and nobody's getting phased or and then at some point it's like, this is going to just make it a draw.
There should be no loser for this.
And it was a draw.
That's how I felt about Cowboys Champions.
It was like that if there were like 40 low blows in the fight.
I mean, you said there were 14 penalties.
There was one penalty I don't think they even counted where the Giants had four penalties on the play and the Cowboys had one and it offset.
So they really
counts for only one?
Yeah, it counts for none.
It's like CeeDee Lamb taunted somebody and they're like, well, we have to disregard the other four penalties.
So the Pats won, they had 12 penalties, two missed PATs,
roughly 500 missed tackles, and they give up a kick return TD, and
somehow they won.
The Colts had 473 yards of offense, two touchdowns, and five field goals.
They had seven scoring drives.
And
leverage.
And leverage.
I wrote this down.
So I'm trying not to get too excited about them because if you remember, 12 months ago,
the New Orleans Saints and Derek Carr went 2-0
and had this, all this offense.
And I think I came on for this podcast hitting into week three
wondering, like, they feel a little 99 Rams-ish.
Right.
And it's one of the worst moments in the recent history of this podcast.
I am not saying anything about the Colts, but they did win and they're 2-0.
And I have no idea if it's going to last.
But I will say, Taylor and Warren might be top
five to seven at their positions right they're receivers that pierce always gets open once a game deep yep um they have downs they have pittman um they have a little bit of a pass rush like they get their defense is okay good special teams
Their defense is definitely better than last year.
Definitely better.
AFC South, which is, you know,
anyone's game always.
But
it begins and ends with the quarterback, right?
And we've seen all of these.
You said, right, Derek Carr, like these old guys
who were good or some guys who were never good between the Derek Carrs and the Zach Wilsons.
But then there's a Sam Darnold who wins like 13 games.
So you can't discount all of them, but you have to keep your eye.
You got to be got to be level-headed.
Yeah,
I told you, I test drove the Colts for AFC South.
Right.
And I talked to a Giants friend of mine who watches every player of every Giants game.
And I was like, how bad was Dimes last year?
We talked about this in the over-under spot.
And he was just like, so bad.
Don't do it.
Don't take it.
Don't stay away.
And it did sway me.
But he does look better than last year.
Couple more games.
The Lions, Bears.
Detroit had seven 20-plus-yard plays in that game.
Yeah.
The Bengal, the Bears, a friend of mine who's a Bears fan was sending all the draft picks they had who did nothing in this game because they had a lot of of first, seconds.
They made some trades, sure.
And they might, especially if they don't hit on Caleb Peace.
Just seems like a write-off.
I don't know if they're a cross-off, but they would certainly be on the list.
I would still have the Panthers over them.
Could we officially make the Panthers our first cross-off team to go?
They want to do it now?
Really?
Yeah.
They're the first one.
There's no way they make the playoffs.
If Tampa loses, aren't they a game out?
No, the Carolina is not making the playoffs.
Oh, yeah.
No.
Let's cross them up.
All right, they're not making it.
I just, I feel we are doing it before the Saints.
I don't know why you like Spencer Rattler over Backdoor Bryce.
Backdoor Bryce, I had that written down.
Tepper, 38 and 82 is an owner in 120 games.
He's good.
120 games, 38 wins for him.
The Seahawks Steelers, we did not talk about.
I think I was right about the Seahawks, and I think they just fucked the game up last week.
They were much better this week.
Their defense is good.
They did get a break of Caleb Johnson just forgetting the new Kagoshiels.
But, you know, considering that at one point they had two picks on the road,
right?
And
it just feels like, oh, they're going to go on two, but they clamped down in the second half.
They have a couple
JSN.
Yeah.
They can run the ball.
He made some plays.
I was looking.
Did you see their, did you say their division odds, or that was somebody else you said?
No, but I can give them to you because they got to be a little better than they were.
They're still 9-1.
What were they?
Was that what they were?
Were they 10 or something?
They haven't budged.
That's pretty good.
That's pretty.
I mean, what other 1-1 team do you think has a shot?
And you get 9-1 odds?
I bet that right now.
Yeah.
Yeah, because the Cardinals are 2-0, and the two games could not have been less inspiring.
They barely held on against Spencer Rattler and Bryce Young.
Like, barely held on down the stretch.
Like, they're holding on for dear life.
And they had some D-back injuries and
you know.
I'm with you.
I don't know why I had them winning 10-11 games, but
well,
two might be it.
You're 2-0.
Two might be it.
One thing on Pittsburgh and Rodgers is it's like last year.
If you pressure him, he sucks.
And now there were stats coming out of today's game where it's like, just as long as you're making a move around, he's not good.
I don't know what happened in their run defense.
Yeah.
Because the Jets ran all over him.
And then Seattle was able to get whatever they wanted today.
So I don't think Pittsburgh has it.
Pittsburgh and Denver defenses are wildly underwhelming so far, right?
In terms of teams that you thought were going to be good coming in.
I don't think it's fixable either.
Ravens killed the Browns.
We didn't talk about that.
Hey, 23, and I had minus 23 and a half.
We do need to talk about that.
Oh, congratulations.
Thank you.
Four to one odds.
That was got a little hairy there for a little while.
Yeah, it was.
I mean, that touchdown the Browns scored was hilarious.
I mean, not for me, but yeah.
Niner Saints.
I wrote down this question for you.
What's the opposite of a multi-view game?
Is it
an oh, no-tie view?
Yeah.
Christopher Maltesante view?
Like, I don't know.
There's got to be some name for it, but I really didn't want to ever put this in my four.
And then there were a couple moments.
when we got near the end of the first early game hour, the ending, where it's like, all right, fine.
Now Now we're watching.
My dad's like, whoa,
this multi-view is crazy.
Now we're watching Saints Niners.
I'm like, I got college teams?
How did you make that out?
I thought that was just what's this guy's name?
Spencer, what?
Spencer, Rattler, Mac Jones.
The 0-0 tie view?
I don't know.
I had to watch it.
I thought I was smart by making the Niners my best bet because it went from seven and a half and then Purdy's out and Mac Jones is minus three.
And I looked at Mac Jones's stats.
He's like six and three against a spread as a starter.
It's like, wow, how did it really?
Is that good?
And then Rattler was like, oh, six and one or something again.
I was like, I'm going to keep betting against the Saints until they give me a reason not to.
Great job.
The mutilate view.
Then Rams Titans, nothing really to say other than Tennessee is just not well coached.
Yeah, that one point three penalties in two weeks.
Did you see his touchdown pass, though?
I watched it live.
It was pretty great.
That was something else.
That gives you hope, huh?
It was like a 50-yard pass across the field.
They'll have a new coach next year i mean really that's the type of quarterback ben johnson should have been aligning with instead he went all in on uh yeah good coach caleb um
okay
we'll take a break for the pod this episode is supported by fx is the lowdown starring ethan hawk allow us to introduce you to lee rabon a quirky journalist slash rare bookstore owner slash unofficial truth seeker who is always on the tail of his latest conspiracy.
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We're going to do guest of the lines.
Thursday night,
Bills Dolphins.
It feels like this is the the Thursday night week two or week three game every year.
Yeah.
I don't know why.
And it's in Buffalo.
You beat me the first two weeks in guest alliance.
Yes, I did.
Dave Jacoby, the most excited.
He really likes it.
He loves it.
He really roots for you.
Wait for that text every Monday.
I have the Bills favored by nine and a half over the Dolphins.
Oh, you son of a bitch.
I had nine.
It's 12 and a half.
Whoa.
12 and a half.
How many
money line, everything are we putting that with?
So if
the Bills kill the Dolphins and the Dolphins are on three and there's 10 days until the next game,
this is where DJ Mikey Mack might meet his demise.
Oh, right.
I didn't even think of that.
Yeah.
If it's bad,
just throwing that out there.
Sunday marquee game.
I do not think this is the best game to watch next week for reasons we described earlier.
But it is the Eagles and the Rams in Philadelphia because that's a rematch of an excellent playoff game last year.
Kind of know how this game's going to go.
I'm not going to enjoy it that much.
The Eagles will probably lead for most of the game.
The Rams will come back late.
It'll be exciting for about 10 minutes.
And I have the Eagles favored by three and a half.
I guess we split it.
I said five and a half.
It's four and a half.
Ooh, Ooh, Vegas zone.
Right there in the Vegas zone.
Yeah.
I'm not sure about the Rams yet.
The running back
situation.
I mean, what was Kyron Williams going for in fantasy leagues?
Like 38, 40?
Right.
And then it's Blake Coram getting the
goal line carries.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Split backfield situation.
The two receivers are putting up yards.
I don't know what it is for me.
I don't get excited for their offense, right?
I should.
Nikul is a dynamic player.
Great.
Now he's getting handoffs and everything.
And it's just fun to see Stafford succeed, right?
For as long as he can.
But yeah, this already bores me this game.
Yeah.
It's like if I'm,
if I'm, who is it going to be?
Brady and
Brady and Burkhart?
Yeah, probably.
Yep.
I'd probably be like, yo, what are the other games?
Can you get me a date with Saints Seahawks?
I only have two two watchables first one Washington and the Raiders I just think this will be a fun game I'm looking forward to it yeah super and it's in Washington let's do it um
Washington with a with a lot of rest raiders coming off whatever happens in the Monday night game and I have Washington favored by three and a half um
that's what I had and it's five and a half oh that's why we split that that's a little high two Vegas zones out of the first three this is a let's be careful week three the other one is a chargers broncos which I thought long and hard about putting in the Sunday marquee.
Hmm.
Wait, you don't put your team as a watchable?
This is watchables we're doing?
Yeah, I'm doing it for America.
I can't be selfish.
Oh, you're doing it for America.
Okay.
Yeah.
I mean, Steelers Pats is watchable for me, but I don't know for America watching those two teams, two non-playoff teams playing, I wouldn't put the watchable cat out.
Okay.
Chargers, Broncos.
This is a good game.
Oh, this moved.
Did it move?
I had Chargers by two and a half.
You'll get it either way.
I had two.
It was two and a half.
It moved to three.
There'll be a lot of Denver fans at this game, we should mention.
Yep.
Well, we'll know.
We're going to know tomorrow night with the Chargers if we have a real contender with them or not, right?
Yeah, I mean, I'm on Vegas tomorrow.
That's one of my 107s, so you could root against that.
I have money on Vegas.
You do?
I'm with you.
Bowers is playing.
Yep.
I think they, I don't know, I wouldn't say they have a home field advantage, but they do have a good crowd.
Yeah.
And we'll see.
We're going to find out a lot from the Chargers.
It's just like neither of these two teams put together two good games in a row ever.
So it's like, I'll take the points.
Well, if the Chargers spank them tomorrow,
they have a case for being the third best team in the conference.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
For sure.
Well, I was predicting you and I talk about Pete Carroll as one of the coach of the year contenders if they win, if they win that game.
Right there.
Fairly watchables.
I have seven.
Let's describe it as a fairly watchable week three.
Packers, Browns normally would go in the poop facto, but it's in Cleveland.
And I like watching the Packers.
So I have
Packers by nine and a half.
I was going to say, you better get it exactly because I did.
Eight and a half.
Ah.
All right.
They can't lose that, right?
It's not cold.
It's not anything.
I mean, that is the definition of a three-team teaser slash eliminator pool.
Just keeps throwing it in things.
I feel pretty good about that.
Speaking of keep throwing, I mean, this is supposed to be like Flacco's semi-retirement.
He's thrown 90 passes in the last two weeks.
I know.
He's like 56 for 90, I think.
Poor bastard.
Did you see that thing today about how Shadur, the Ravens, told him they're going to take him in the fifth round and his team discouraged it?
Did he want to back up Lamar?
Yeah, right.
And now he's the fourth back.
That can't be.
You don't want to back up Lamar.
Who is a better person to back up and learn, like go to a great franchise and back up Lamar and
try to pick some shit up?
You're not going to be a starter for a couple years anyway.
Did he say this in the third round when no one had taken him?
Did his team was he still like trying to?
I think they told him we're going to, according to the report, they're going to take him in the fifth round and he didn't want them to
like that day, that day, yeah,
yeah, yeah.
I mean, if you would have told him the day before the draft, he'd be like, go screw yourself.
Yeah, well, he thought he was going to the first round, right?
Right.
Uh, Colts Titans.
Wow, is this this
game is pulsating as a don't be careful?
Uh, it's in Tennessee, yeah, it has the makings of like 92% of the people on whatever have picked the Colts.
I have Colts by three and a half.
It hit that exactly.
Yeah.
Yep.
Both of us.
That's tough.
That is a, that is a, be careful.
Yep.
That's a leverage.
All week.
All week.
Colts 2-0.
Daniel Dimes rejuvenated.
Ursay's daughters.
She's on the sidelines with a headset taking notes.
There's a new energy around this team.
Everything is so great.
Colts, Colts, Colts.
And then it's like punt return, tightens up 10-0.
Leverage play against you coming.
Exactly.
Vikings, Bengals in Minnesota.
Jake Browning aboard.
This has to go in the Vegas zone.
I had the Vikings by five and a half.
Did this move?
I had
a move seeking.
It's three and a half.
No, I promise.
No, I had five.
It's only three and a half.
I mean, we probably should have adjusted this after, I did this before
that miserable game we just saw.
Yeah, but that line, that doesn't make sense to me because how many more points is Joe Burrow worth than Jake Browning?
Like six, seven?
So if Joe Burrow was playing, the Bengals would be three and a half point favorites in Minnesota?
I think so.
I mean, I think the better question is how many more points is J.J.
McCarthy worth than Browning?
That line's too low.
That's going to go up.
Next one is Steelers at the Pats.
I think I hit this one exactly.
I did not see it.
Go ahead.
Steelers minus two and a half.
It's, yeah, you're going to think I cheated.
I said two.
It's one and a half.
Oh, they tic-taced me?
They tic-tacked you.
That could move, though.
I think we can win that game.
I think we can run on that team.
That's a fun one.
I like that game.
Really good.
As you know, I love the locker room videos.
Yeah.
Fantastic Vrabel locker room video.
He's about to give his first game ball.
Kraft wanders in.
Hold on a second.
And then it just grabs it and does a little speech for Vrabel, gives him the game ball.
And then Vrabel goes around and gives game balls to like Ramondre and Milton Williams and
all the heroes of the game.
And then the last game ball turns to the kicker, this motherfucker who missed his first two pats and then field goal and made the 53 yarder to kind of pseudo-ice the game he's coming in and we're like they're gonna this guy missed two pats they're gonna he's gonna do a 50 and he nailed it right and vrabo throws in the ball and he's like hey
we believe in you we sent you out there because i knew you were gonna make that kick and team cheered they did but that was a fake cheer like 48 guys were like
i worked my ass off and didn't miss extra points what are you doing i was like we all had to work our asses off because this shit had missed two PATs.
Now he gets a game ball.
This is a participation trophy.
What is this?
I liked it.
He was like, this is my kicker.
Right.
Jaguars, Texans in Jacksonville.
And
if I've ever seen a one and a half line, this is it.
I have the Jaguars by one and a half.
You nailed it.
Good.
I said one.
You get that.
It's a good game.
That's.
So if the Texans are awesome tomorrow,
let's say they beat the Bucs.
Right.
This line immediately flips to Texans minus one and a half, I think.
I guess.
So, yeah, they're counting the short week here, but they're not counting the long hair on Trevor Lawrence.
What do you think the AFC South odds are right now?
Did you look?
Do you have a look?
I haven't looked.
Who do you think the favorite in the AFC South is right now?
So the Colts are 2-0.
Jags are 1-1.
Titans 0-2.
Texans are 1-1.
And we're favored the whole whole preseason.
I mean, God, did they make the Colts a favorite?
A slight favorite?
Slight favorite, plus 160.
Texans plus 185.
Jags plus 260.
Titans down to 13-1.
So the Texans win that.
Plus 160 is pretty enticing.
They have a minus if the Texans win tomorrow.
They'll have a minus.
Oh, I forgot.
Yeah.
We're legally prohibited from betting on the AFC South division.
Yeah.
Trump signed that rule.
He said he didn't allow anybody to do it.
That I would abide by.
What is a rare win for Trump?
We have something like that.
We have the NFC South that's going to win more games than the AFC South.
And we have juice toward the NFC South.
And then we also have
29 and a half wins for the AFC South.
We have two AFC South bets.
Oh, okay.
What was Hench complaining about?
I mean, that's.
Hench is complaining because the Colts won in that bump that threatens FCC.
Yeah, we're all right.
We're okay.
The problem with doing these future bets with Hench is he talks about them every week.
And at some point, you almost start mentally rooting against them.
So you don't get to.
What was Hench complaining about could be a whole nother segment on this podcast?
Well, he did not like the Broncos.
No.
Hench had some thoughts on the leverage rule.
Bears, Cowboys.
This is a borderline loser-leaves town match, and it's in Chicago.
And there's going to be a week of Caleb Johnson, Caleb Williams, Ben Johnson, Ryan Poles.
This is the referendum week.
How did we get this so wrong?
What's going on with this team?
Nick Wright picked them to win this to make the Super Bowl a year ago.
He did.
Yeah, he did.
High hopes for two years with this team.
I picked them to make the playoffs this year.
Now it's a big referendum.
And now they're playing your dumb team.
I was off by a half a point, I'm warning you here.
And I'm proud of myself for getting it even that close.
I tic-taced it.
I went Bears one and a half.
Son of a bitch.
That's exactly right.
Am I winning?
Two, three, four, five, six, seven.
Two, three, four.
Seven to six, you're winning.
Oh, great.
Last one, Niners cards with Mac Jones because Purdy's not going to play, and it's in San Francisco.
And the cards are one of the least impressive 2-0s that we've seen.
They can't believe they're 2-0.
I have the Niners one and a half.
I mean, you're closer than I was.
I had the Niners by three,
and it's Arizona by one and a half.
Oh, my Lord.
Wait, let's look at that for a second.
Really?
Arizona Cardinals, minus one and a half, minus one oh.
San Francisco Fortnites, plus one and a half, minus one I did.
Yeah, I really disagree with that.
Yeah, I do too.
Then again, you get to bet against Mac Jones.
So why not?
Yeah, Mac Jones.
Poop Fecta.
Bucks Jets in Tampa.
And I have the Bucks by six and a half.
Oh, come on.
Do you really?
Let me see it.
What is it?
Let me say it.
I can't see.
It's six and a half.
I said seven.
You get it.
Is that a tease for us?
Yeah, I think so.
Old school?
The test of Verdi Bowl?
All the six and a half level teases, parlays were hitting the first two weeks, which means we're due for one of them to
a lot of oversight.
Cardinals today was a great one.
Falcons at Carolina.
This is interesting.
I had three and a half before the Falcons came today, and I bumped it to Vegas Zone afterwards.
I have Falcons by four and a half.
It's three and a half.
I said four.
We split that, right?
No, you win that then.
Wait, sure, it's three and a half?
Oh, yeah, I do win it.
Yep, three and a half.
I didn't write it because
we didn't have it it.
Is it still three and a half?
I'll keep staring at it.
Yeah, Falcons, three and a half at Panthers.
Yeah, I get that.
Just taking the Panthers plus three and a half.
So, somebody,
we have to, you know, that thing you were talking about where the AI warns you not to bet it?
That we can't bet this.
Either the Panthers are upsetting the Falcons or, like you said, the Titans are upsetting the Colts.
Well, this is Falcons outdoors, Falcons as a road favorite.
Right, right.
Falcons with positive momentum and good feelings and good vibes.
Yep.
And
yeah, it's a stayaway.
For sure.
And if it drops to three or below, I'll be betting it.
Seahawks in Seattle against the Saints.
And this is either seven or seven and a half.
And I went back and forth and I landed at seven and a half.
Seattle was seven, and I had nine and a half, so it doesn't matter.
You get it.
Yep.
Yeah.
You like that better than any teaser.
Yeah, that's pretty good.
Spencer Rattler in Seattle, defense is good.
Get a nice win on the board, run the ball.
Uh, Saints outdoors.
That's that's a
lot more
if they were coming off a loss.
They always have the one fucked up home game, right?
Sunday night, uh, Chiefs at the Giants.
I got this exact the morning, yeah.
Okay, I big asoned it.
I did Chiefs by four and a half.
It's five and a half.
Fuck, so I'm up one.
Man, there's a lot of teaser games.
Four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, two, three.
Oh, you're up two.
It's over.
Oh, Jacoby.
It's over.
Finally.
W for this guy.
The good guys finally got one.
Jacob's.
Oh, rest of my starters for the Monday night game.
Ravens
home for the Detroit Lions.
A game that a week ago I wasn't that excited about.
And now I'm like pumped.
Yep.
A great game.
I did Ravens minus three and a half.
All right, I said four.
Doesn't matter.
It's five and a half.
So you win 10 to 9.
So we have, let me see.
There's a lot of teaser Vegas zone games there.
Three, four Vegas zone games.
And then we have
Green Bays.
And then Packers minus eight and a half for the teasers.
And Seattle, right?
In Seattle.
And Seattle minus 1.
Oh, we're going to get crushed next week.
This is bad.
Bonus.
There's no answer for this yet, but Crawford-Canelo rematch.
Who's favored?
All right.
So Canelo was what, like a minus 180 going into last night?
Yep.
Man, I think it's a toss-up.
Like minus 120 each side, even.
There's no line yet.
I looked because the rematch hasn't been announced yet.
So I don't think they have lines.
I think it would be Crawford by minus 125 to minus 130.
Do you?
Yeah.
Yeah, because people,
I hope people appreciate what Bud Crawford did Saturday night, right?
To go up to the next one.
I want to talk about it.
First of all,
my sources say that there will be a rematch.
Yeah, there should.
Yeah, that is happening.
I
rarely am like awe-stricken by a sporting event, but I thought, been watching boxing my whole life, dating back to ali in 1974 all the way through and uh you were
18 months old then what he was watching wide world of sports watching ali fight whoever like that's when i i've always loved boxing and crawford's one of the best fighters i've ever seen he's if i'm making some list he just has to be on it now
No question about it.
And I feel like he falls victim to the fact that boxing hasn't been good in, I don't know, 15, 20 years.
I don't even know what it is.
So it hurts his legacy.
And Canelo's too, by the way, that that there's no Sugar Ray, there's no De La Hoya, there's no Hearns, like even like a Winky Wright, right?
Like those guys were great, you know, super
medals, his biggest fight was Spence, and he killed Spence to the point that it almost didn't seem like they're on the same level, which wasn't his fault.
Yeah, he's 42-0, and Spence is the only one anyone cared about.
And most people, like a lot of people, only knew about Crawford like last night.
But that doesn't happen going up two weight classes like that and winning as a 37-year-old.
It's just crazy.
Right.
It's a crazy thing to do.
He gained 21 pounds and fought a dude who is naturally already one of the strongest people in the history of that division, who, by the way, has one of the, Max said this last night.
I thought Max was great.
I love him.
I miss him.
I miss him.
Max was so good on that fight, but
Max was saying he has one of the great shins of all time.
And it's like, yeah, he actually does.
Like there was that great social video that happened of when Crawford stunned him and Canelo did like almost a 180 and was was like, whoa,
I've never seen stars before from a punch.
But Crawford, like the chess match that was going on, it was just such a high level of boxing.
It was so different than that rock'em-sock'em fight from the three fights earlier.
Yeah.
It was just these guys feeling each other out and Crawford, right as Canelo is starting to feel like he had momentum, he just shifts.
He gets inside in his body and starts using his athleticism.
Then he moves back again.
He's moving side to side.
And it was just a masterpiece, man.
It really was.
It was a clinic, like young boxers should learn from that.
I mean, you know, Canelo's not in his prime either, but the fact that the game plan for a lighter guy is always hit and move, right?
Just hit and move and don't get in the clench.
And somewhere early on, he must have realized like, I could take Canelo's best punch.
I don't care.
I'll fight inside against him.
Or he just doesn't give a shit, right?
Like, that's probably it.
He's like, I'm so tough.
It's all right.
I have a good chin, too.
And listen, it was just great.
It's a shame boxing only produces a a fight that we care about that doesn't involve one of the Pauls every four years.
So that better be a rematch.
Yeah, like when Sugar A came back and he moved up to fight Haguer,
which was the same spring as Hogan versus Andre, I think it was like two weekends apart.
And it was, you know,
for us, it was like these were one of the greatest stretches ever.
Yeah.
I was so scared for Leonard moving up.
Like, I really felt like he was potentially going to die.
It was like, this is a suicide mission that he's doing this.
Right.
And what Crawford did was like five times crazier.
Yeah.
Like to move up, jump two divisions like that.
And even the first couple rounds, Cannell is hitting him on the sides, right?
He's hitting him on his hips and he's hitting him low.
And it's just like he, there's no way he's ever felt punches like that before, but he was just bouncing off him.
Really good.
It's like Superman.
He's so good.
Were you nervous for Hogan when he went up in class to fight Andre?
Is that what you're saying too?
I was nervous the whole time.
I didn't know Andre was unbeatable.
He's going up anywhere from 250 pounds, maybe.
We can't get a reading.
Yeah, when Leonard fought Hagrar, he was so surgical about how he would attack the rounds.
And he would just kind of
come in, do little flurries, get out.
And he would pick like these little 15.
Crawford wasn't doing that at all.
Crawford was like, I'm fighting this guy.
Yeah.
And I'm not afraid of him.
He can't hurt me.
I'm faster than him.
And I thought, especially in the later rounds, it felt like Canelo got really discouraged.
Like, there, I thought in the 10th or 11th round, it almost seemed like, not that he was quitting, but like he had kind of just lost.
Yeah.
I don't know what.
And, but then he came back, but of course, the cards were outrageous.
Well, the two judges had a lot of people.
Two of the judges had a 5-5.
Yeah, going into the 11th.
That's terrible.
I don't know what the answer is to that either, because I was like, maybe we just let AI score these, but Netflix AI had it a draw.
So I'm not sure what the deal.
Thankfully, they didn't screw Crawford.
And then I'm reading online, like, oh, he was, there were people describing it like you said that it might have been like, oh, he really didn't.
He only engaged with him in four rounds.
Like, no way.
He was taking it to Canelo.
Like, he didn't care.
No, he was in command of the command of the fight has to matter if you're scoring it.
I, I just, I don't think we've ever totally figured out how to score these things.
We should have more than three judges.
It's crazy they only have three, right?
Talk about small sample size.
You just need two people to fuck up out of three, and you have the wrong decision.
It should be five.
But
then you have these rounds like the first round where nobody wins the first round and people are just like, oh, champ gets that.
You should be getting
nothing.
I think you're frowned.
It's frowned upon if you're a professional judge and you give a 10-10 round.
But some
rounds are first round was a 10-10 round.
Nobody won the first round.
Yeah, one guy lands six punches, the other lands five.
What do you got?
You got to pick one?
Oh, come on.
Yeah.
But I thought the ones that were won were won by way more were won by Crawford.
I thought Canelo won three rounds and gave him the first round.
Congratulations.
But I thought for boxing, it was a great night.
I mean,
I don't know what the official audience was, but it was probably like 60 million people watching that.
Yeah.
Which, so it's the biggest boxing event ever.
Most of those people have only tangentially heard of Crawford.
And he has his.
His greatest fight, Spence.
This was his most important fight.
Yeah.
But took it to him.
And I don't, I think if they fought 10 times, I think he would beat Canelo every time.
Maybe one of the 10 times Canelo would maybe catch him once.
But athletically, he just was never in danger ever.
And I really thought he took it to him a few times, too.
That's what was special about it.
Canelo, it's funny we say that because Crawford's got three years on him, three years older.
But Canelo, if you look at his last, what do you have?
He's coming off seven unanimous decisions, right?
And the volume just isn't there like it was like cinco de mayo 10 years ago yeah i mean you know and the and the power i think is gone too he does do that thing that you were talking about where he'll just like turn his head like oh did that hurt did that hurt you or did that miss completely so right he really does have a good chin but uh he had to use it for sure there was a little bit of uh
this meant more to crawford than canelo not that it didn't mean something to canelo but even his quotes afterwards right
minted whatever happens he's one of the most popular fighters of the the last 30 years.
Yeah.
And he's already won a shitload of fights and he's made a shitload of money.
And whether he won or lost this, I don't think really ultimately mattered.
But for Crawford, it did because
Crawford had to win this.
Now he's on this completely different list.
He's one of the two or three most important boxers of the first 25 years of boxing.
And if you go back to the last 50 years since Ali, he's on that list too.
He just has to be on there with Mayweather and Hopkins and whoever whoever else you want to put on.
And
he needed it.
I mean, how many times have we seen a guy go up to a weight class and it's like, ah, shame, we root for the little guy and it just doesn't happen.
It just gets, it just gets, you know, engulfed, but it wasn't like that at all.
So I wonder
he probably, he could probably go down to middleweight and win that one too if he wanted because I don't think anybody there could be.
He could also go up to 175 and try to fight B-ball, which would be fucking crazy.
But imagine if he did that
he's like all right i'll just
i'll just now go to 175.
that's gonna be his 40s yeah that's what he's gonna do in his 40s nuts if he did that but right you know
well bernard hopkins was doing that right late in his career he's just taking all the fights and making as much money as he can and the weights were all over the place but uh he's great he's great i'm glad a lot of people got to introduce to him yesterday
there's a charisma and a coolness to him too that i think is unusual.
Like people like Hopkins, Larry Holmes, like some of these guys who had these great records or streaks, but there was something slightly missing from a personality standpoint.
Hopkins, and Hopkins knew it and was always trying to overcompensate for it.
But
Bud's just, he's just got it.
There's something about him that I don't know.
There's just that charisma to him.
I wish I had gone.
I really regret not going, but I came back east.
I'm trying to be a good parent.
You were in the wrong, you know, she doesn't want to transfer to UNLV.
You can see a lot of the fights there.
All right.
We have to do, let's do a little parent corner.
All right.
Hold on.
Oh, yeah.
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what do you got so all right so um my 12-year-old now is um on this travel baseball team and they've been playing together for like three or four years and this is the year at 12 you go to cooperstown right now it used to be oh only the best teams in the country go to cooperstown now you could just organize your own there are so many tournaments up there right so you don't have to be great and it's in july and so as long as harrison doesn't get cut between now and then he's batting like 240 right now so let's uh cross our fingers but um so you go a week to Cooperstown in July.
You're there upstate New York.
It's great.
You're guaranteed like five games.
There's a home run derby.
It's beautiful.
But the shit's expensive.
It's like $2,600
per kid.
And that includes like flight,
boarding.
They're all in like bunk beds in a hotel in Cooperstown, like in the barracks.
It's fun.
And you get food.
And that's just for the kids.
The rest of the family pays for themselves.
So we're trying to fund it.
It couldn't be harder to get to either.
It's very hard.
Yeah.
You have to land.
There is an airport in Albany, but you're probably going to land in the city.
Connecting.
There's buses.
Yeah.
It's going to be,
it better be fun because it's a, it's a trudge for sure.
So we're trying to fundraise because at 2,600 a kid, I think we're trying to raise like 35,000 to get the, just that, the team part of it paid for.
So we, as a fundraiser, we have all these parent parties.
That was your Broncos bet today?
Believe me, it gets there.
You have all these parties, right?
And you sell tickets to these parties and it's raffles and everything's going on.
And like, I'm going to help run the Super Bowl squares pool, but I'm going to buy like half the squares, right?
And it's not like these kids do anything.
They don't sell lemonade or like Christmas wrapping paper or something.
It's all on the parents to get together for these fundraisers.
So Friday night, Melissa's at the fundraiser.
We already bought the tickets.
I can't go because I am at Harrison's flag football game.
So there's a family that's nice enough to host.
She goes, I go to Harrison's football game.
All the while I'm watching on my phone, I bet the Mets stupid, dumb, just dumb.
And I bet UCLA, which is even stupider, right?
The coach has been fired since.
So I'm bummed.
We get home around the same time from the flag game and from the from the fundraiser.
And I said, how was it?
She says it was fun.
And we love all the parents, like they're dynamite.
So she had a good time.
I get a little gossip from the party.
And then she mentions there's a 50-50 raffle, $1,000.
And then she won.
I was like, oh my God, this is great.
I was like, $1,000.
Like, well, I won $500 because it's 50-50.
50% goes to the fundraiser.
I'm like, okay, wow, 500, that's great.
And I'm like, I'm thinking, I lost my UCLA and maybe I can get my money back here.
You know,
can I see it?
Can I at least see the 500?
Maybe I won't get any of it, but let me see it.
She's like, oh, well, I gave it back.
I mean, it's all for the fundraiser.
I was like, you gave it back?
What is the fun?
Why don't we just pay for our kids if this is what it's like?
You gave it.
I had UCLA and the Mets.
And she's like, but this is what you do.
If you win, you give it back.
I said, so then it's a 100-0 fundraiser.
Yeah, that's it.
It's a zero.
You got to change it from 50-50 to 100-0 or 0-100.
She's like, well, all the parents are doing this kind of thing.
I'm like, yes, but all the parents aren't betting UCLA and the Mets.
So
it just weirded me out.
And like I said, I love, and all these parents parents listen to this, and they're going to think I'm a nutcase here.
But fundraising for kids is kind of a joke.
It just is.
You've done this, right?
You had to have.
La Crosse, something, socks.
I never knew people pocketed the 50-50 part.
I always thought that went back to the thing.
Oh, the 50-50.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I just thought it was like a
Ponzi scheme for the, you just gave it back anyway.
It's really 100-zero.
But the fun, it's not a fundraiser if you're paying all the funds.
If If everybody, all the parents are paying, I don't know.
They have to change.
Would have been funny if you won and you're like, yeah,
you're waiving the $500.
Yeah.
Can't wait to spend this in Cooperstown.
I'm getting my kids some hats, some signed vintage hats.
Oh, shit.
All right.
Well, maybe I'm the idiot then.
Whatever.
I've missed out on Cooperstown because
it was.
the year my son was 12.
It was COVID.
Oh, right.
We had a whole Cooperstown thing.
We're about to do all the same stuff.
And then
you should go next July.
You know what?
I'll fundraise for you.
I can get $2,600 for you to go.
My wife and my, you didn't have a daughter, and you miss out on the daughter wife dynamics, which are just spectacular.
I love that.
So I flew in Friday night.
And I was getting here in time to maybe go to dinner.
My wife was already here.
So my wife was here.
I'm here.
We're going to go out to dinner with my daughter who's playing in a game the next day.
And I'm just going to read highlights from the text thread as I'm on the plane and we're trying to figure out the dinner.
And I'll redact the restaurants.
Okay.
So I said, blah, blah, blah.
I suggested a restaurant.
I'll drop my stuff off and meet you.
Zoe says to my mom, Did you see this?
Blah, blah, blah.
It's too late.
Let's go to the second restaurant.
What time time are we going to eat?
That's now a bunch more tech.
So now I'm on the plane.
I'm watching this.
I'm like, oh boy, it's like watching the two hockey enforcers out that are skating around and they're about to like get into it.
Now Zoe goes, I'd rather eat earlier because of the game.
Is eight o'clock possible anywhere?
I agree.
Do you want Italian?
Then she suggests a steak place.
Zoe comes back, what about American?
And then she says, I want Italian.
Let's go to the north end.
Then my wife now is getting mad.
She's like, well, dad's flying in.
He's going to land.
He's going to drop his stuff off.
Like that's going to be too hard.
Right.
I suggest the place.
So he shoots that down.
She does this other place.
It's supposed to be amazing.
8:15.
All right, in there.
She can't get a reservation.
We do another thing.
We try another one.
Now we're up to 10 restaurants we've tried just on the text thread.
And I'm like, now we're going to get in a fight.
It's going to happen.
Finally, my wife gets mad.
Change of plans.
We're just going to order in.
Z, you can just come over.
I like this idea.
Now Zoe starts suggesting restaurants we should order from.
Now we start arguing about that.
Finally,
hold on.
I'm scrolling through all the texts.
Have you put your input at all at this point?
Or are you just watching?
I've just chimed in a couple of times.
Now we're on like our fifth postmates thing, and I finally text, it's too bad we couldn't have have made this more complicated over the past few hours.
Joking.
Zoe comes back.
All you've done is fly today.
Chill.
And then I say, I'll do whatever.
And then Zoe does the, I can also do my own thing for dinner and hang out later.
Oh, boy.
Now Carrie comes back with the seriously exclamation point.
Let's fucking get it from somewhere else.
And I'm like, oh, now we've had an F-bomb.
Now Zoe goes, why are you guys being so crazy?
It's not too complicated.
It's dinner.
Who cares?
She suggested 15 restaurants and seven postmates restaurants.
And we keep going, we keep going.
And then my wife does that.
I've spent a lot of my day and a lot of energy talking about dinner, and I'm being super rude as I spend all this time on a meal.
Just call me and let's figure this out.
Pick up the phone.
And then Zoe goes, Well, who cares?
I didn't think this was such a big deal.
And it keeps going and it keeps going and it keeps going.
No.
so he says, I don't understand how this is upsetting.
It's dinner.
Geez, fine.
I don't even care where we eat.
She's up to 17 restaurants.
She says that's this point.
I've had a super long week.
More texts, more texts.
This is honestly bumming me out.
It keeps going.
This is going to stress me out.
And we just go.
And then we finally just ended up getting postmates somewhere.
And it was.
Is it American?
This was like, no, this is when
whatever the version of the Iran-Contra hearings, when they confiscate the phones, people would just be studying the 700 texts that
led to me having a chicken parm that was like a B-minus from someplace at 9.30 at night.
You missed out on all of this, though.
And then they were mad at each other for like two hours.
Oh, that's terrible.
She shouldn't have picked up the phone.
They should have called on the phone.
It would have been fine, right?
Or you make the decision.
The last text on the thread is, no one says you can't come over and see us.
It's just easier if we don't have to deal with winter because you can't seem to make up your mind.
and then uh
it's really something
you have to miss out on all this i know you just have your wife just getting disappointed that your son doesn't show enough affection right yeah there's meanwhile i'm flying across country to see my daughter you should get point you should get to pick dinner then that you absolutely should i mean i know you're not gonna be able to explain that to a kid like
and here's the other thing she's gonna be mad now that i've even talked about this well how about this?
We don't even have to go to dinner any night.
This is going to be another 80 texts.
I love it.
Yeah, I'll keep you posted.
All right, let me keep me post, mated.
I'll keep you posted.
That was uh, that was today's parent corner, and it was brought to you by Workday.
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How's it going at the uh Ringer Gambling Show?
It's good.
It's a lot of fun.
Who's your favorite partner?
You have Tate on Tuesdays.
Oh, man.
You have Dubundo and House on Wednesdays.
Debundo and Hyfits.
Do you want a power rank or do you want to wait till October?
I got to wait a little bit.
I think the shows are all really good.
I'm closest with Joe House and Tate.
I got to, yeah, don't make me do this.
Don't make me.
This is like ordering dinner.
I can't do this.
Yeah.
It's a lot of fun.
Yes.
If you're a forward thinker, Tuesday at noon with Tate.
Wednesday with Joe House and Debundo.
Live.
This is all on the Ringer Gambling channel on YouTube.
And Friday with my Ringer 107 partner, Anthony Debundo, and Danny Heifitz.
It's all a lot of fun.
And then the Sunday pregame show.
We gave out a bunch of winners, probably losers too.
But
you had some winners today.
There were some good ones today.
Will you please tell Raheem, God bless him, he can't take the Chiefs as an underdog if they're minus 107.
If Howie and Terry do it, whatever, it's fine.
They don't know anybody.
I think that's your number one pet piece.
I hate it.
I hate it.
And then I have to be salty the whole rest of the time.
And when I give my underdog, I'm like, your head's going to spin because I have a plus money dog, on the underdog.
You're not going to understand this concept, Raheem.
And he's like, what?
Why are you getting so mad?
Underdogs have a plus.
So what was the best underdog that won today?
It was Colts plus two and a half.
Should have been the Giants, but should have been the Jaguars.
Oh, Seahawks plus three.
Patriots plus one and two.
Falcons plus three and a half.
That was the biggest one.
Falcons.
Yes.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
Falcons plus three and a half.
Yep.
I don't know if.
Yeah, we did.
We definitely didn't have like a plus 200 or higher money line.
No, but you can't take minus.
Stop.
Come on.
You can't take a minus as another dog.
That's too bad.
I apologize that he did that.
You won on Crawford, right?
You bet on that.
I did.
I loved it.
I was a little nervous.
I bet.
You know what, though?
To Raheem's credit, that's a nice hedge, the draw.
If they don't feel like giving the challenger the win sometimes, but there was already a draw on that card.
So I was like, all right, well, there goes the draw.
They're not going to have two draws, but that's a good way to hedge a little bit.
I didn't necessarily know who's going to win.
I just thought the odds were off.
Yeah.
And I thought it meant a little more to Crawford, but I also would not have been surprised if Canelo won.
But I thought the plus 140 was a little insulting.
And how rare is it that we're on the fun side of history in some of these, right?
We won.
We did it.
It was great.
Who was your favorite celebrity that was there?
I like that Saudi guy in the front row who wasn't watching.
I assume he's famous.
He got booed.
He did?
Yeah.
He got booed.
He's on the undercard of the rematch.
I don't know.
I wasn't.
Who'd you like?
I mean, I like Tyson always.
You know, they interviewed Mark Wahlberg at one point.
And I've done, I've had him on, I had him on the pod when I was ESPN.
I thought he was a good guest.
But
some of these celebrities don't feel like they have to try to be that entertaining when they're being interviewed.
They're in that no man's land of they want to talk about the fight.
Right.
And they, but they for, like, if you go on a talk show, they, they come in with their stories, but when they get interviewed for things like this, they, they kind of don't know how to act.
I think there should be a consultancy firm to help them out with this.
Oh, really?
Yeah.
They come in, they're like, they don't really have jokes, but they don't have expertise either.
And they just kind of go, it's great to be here, man.
I'm so excited, you know, that, but they don't really have to be able to do that.
That's a great idea.
That's really a good idea.
Like, hey, Mark, tell a story about the time you met Lennox Lewis and you bought, like, they should have anecdotes.
I was, because I was trying to think, like, the publicists isn't enough, right?
Like, our dear friend Louis Kay could give some advice to someone, a client that's coming on for the first time.
But yeah, you're right.
As far as like structuring stories and stuff like that, this will work.
Just have like one anecdote.
Yeah.
Like the time you met Muhammad Ali at the 2012 Olympics.
I've loved boxing boxing since the day of what I'm doing.
Do your best three parent corners and just read texts.
Yeah.
Has Chris Chan invited you to play at Bel Air yet?
No.
Play what?
Golf?
Chris Chan, our friend, belongs to Bel Air Country Club now, and he got upset last week because House and I talked about it.
Oh.
Because he was trying to keep it quiet because he didn't want to have a lot of people know because then people want to play there.
Right.
And then we talked about it and now he was upset because a lot of people had reached out to him.
So, I didn't know if he'd reached out to you about playing at Bel Air.
I see.
No, no, he hasn't.
He hasn't, but
we're off the air, right?
Because then even we're still on.
Oh, we're still on.
Oh, all right.
Yeah, okay.
So, good for Chris.
Well, maybe he'll maybe invite you.
You don't play golf, though.
I don't, but I'm glad.
Maybe he'll come invite you for a hang.
I'm glad you mentioned it now.
I'm definitely going to reach out to him.
Yeah.
Reach out to him.
We're in a couple of
country clubs, a good place to start for me.
Yeah.
All right.
Thanks to Gahal and Eduardo.
Don't forget, I have a rewatchables coming Monday night, 10 Cup.
Oh, nice.
And Prestige TV, we've been covering, we've been recapping Task, which is an excellent, excellent show on HBO.
So have that too.
Cuz, I'll see you in a week.
Good job by you.
Good job by you, buddy.
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