The Girlfriends S2/E5: Her Legacy

Speaker 1 This is an iHeart podcast.

Speaker 2 Time for a sofa upgrade? Visit washable sofas.com and discover Anibay, where designer style meets budget-friendly prices.

Speaker 2 With sofas starting at $699, Anibay brings you the ultimate in furniture innovation with a modular design that allows you to rearrange your space effortlessly.

Speaker 2 Perfect for both small and large spaces, Anibay is the only machine-washable sofa inside and out.

Speaker 2 Say goodbye to stains and messes with liquid liquid and stain-resistant fabrics that make cleaning easy. Liquid simply slides right off.

Speaker 2 Designed for custom comfort, our high-resilience foam lets you choose between a sink-in feel or a supportive memory foam blend.

Speaker 2 Plus, our pet-friendly stain-resistant fabrics ensure your sofa stays beautiful for years. Don't compromise quality for price.

Speaker 2 Visit washable sofas.com to upgrade your living space today with no risk returns and a 30-day money-back guarantee. Get up to 60% off plus free shipping and free returns.

Speaker 2 Shop now at washable sofas.com. Offers are subject to change and certain restrictions may apply.

Speaker 3 If you're waiting for your AI to turn into ROI

Speaker 3 and wondering how long you have to wait,

Speaker 3 maybe you need to do more than wait.

Speaker 3 Any business can use AI. IBM helps you use AI to change how you do business.

Speaker 3 Let's create Smarter Business, IBM.

Speaker 4 Parking shouldn't slow you down.

Speaker 5 ParkWiz gives every driver a shortcut.

Speaker 7 Book ahead, save up to 50%, and skip the hassle of circling the block.

Speaker 5 Park smarter, park faster, ParkWiz.

Speaker 8 Download the ParkWiz app today and save every time you park.

Speaker 1 Your drive powers your day. Now let it power change in your community too.
And when it comes to helping children in the Bay Area, Shell can keep your kindness rolling.

Speaker 1 When you fill fill up at the Purple Giving Pump at Shell, a portion of your purchase is donated to charities like the California Fire Foundation.

Speaker 1 Download the Shell app to find your nearest giving pump, less than one mile away. Because giving back doesn't cost you extra.

Speaker 1 From September 1st to October 31st, participating Shell stations will donate a minimum of one cent per gallon of the fuel pump from the giving pump, or a minimum donation of $300.

Speaker 9 Novel.

Speaker 10 Hey listener, here we are at our final episode. I just wanted to let you know that we are releasing our soundtrack as an EP.
You can listen on all reputable streaming platforms.

Speaker 10 You can also purchase the EP by going to bandcamp.com and searching for the girlfriend's Our Lost Sister soundtrack. All proceeds go to our charity partner, DNA Doe Project.

Speaker 10 In this final episode, we'll be talking a lot about drug addiction. We'll also speak about parental neglect, sex work, as well as acts of extreme violence, including murder.

Speaker 10 But in amongst all this darkness, you'll also hear a woman's story brought to life by the people who loved her.

Speaker 10 If you feel impacted by any of the themes while listening, I encourage you to check out our charity partner, DNA Doe Project.

Speaker 10 They work with law enforcement to identify Jane and John Does using genetic genealogy in the hopes of reuniting the bodies of unidentified people with their families.

Speaker 10 You can find them at DNADoeProject.org. And one more thing, you'll probably hear more bad language from me.
I mean, it's the final episode, so why stop now, you know?

Speaker 10 So far, on the girlfriend's Our Lost Sister.

Speaker 10 The whole thing is so horrific, it's almost like it's become this moral obligation to find her.

Speaker 12 In 98, did missing persons really want to deal with a 1989 torso that washed up?

Speaker 11 I don't know.

Speaker 10 Hi, it's Dr. Shapiro, and I'd like to speak with the deputy medical examiner.

Speaker 3 Do you mind if I send a text?

Speaker 14 Yeah, I might get something right away.

Speaker 11 What?

Speaker 11 Who do you know?

Speaker 10 Could you say perpetrator for me?

Speaker 9 Perpetrator.

Speaker 16 Who is she? Let's bring closure to another family. Let's open this door.

Speaker 11 Hello.

Speaker 17 Hi, is this Anne?

Speaker 18 It is.

Speaker 10 When Anna reached out to Heidi Balch's family, they were pretty shocked to hear hear from her. And trust me, I can certainly relate to that.
But despite their surprise, they agreed to talk.

Speaker 10 So, Anna explains the long, complicated story. How a torso washed up on Staten Island and was buried in Gail Katz's grave for nearly a decade.

Speaker 10 And how DNA testing eventually proved that it wasn't Gail.

Speaker 10 And how that torso was then buried on Heart Island. until 2013 when it was exhumed once again by the office of the Chief Medical Examiners.

Speaker 10 We asked Heidi's family for records, anything relating to the police or medical examiners that they would be willing to share with us to help us solve this mystery once and for all.

Speaker 10 They forward us an email, which they were sent by the police back in 2013, and included in there, two paragraphs down, is a medical examiner case number,

Speaker 10 R890563,

Speaker 10 which is a number some discerning listeners may recognize because it's the same number that we've had in our files for a year and a half.

Speaker 10 It's the number that all the way back in 1989 was assigned to our Jane Doe's torso, the one that was misidentified as Gail Katz.

Speaker 10 I can't believe I'm saying this, girlfriends, but we finally have the proof. We found our lost sister, and her name is Heidi Balsch.

Speaker 10 I'm Carol Fisher, and from the teams at Novel and iHeart Podcast, this is the Girlfriends, Our Lost Sister, Episode 5: Her Legacy.

Speaker 10 Okay, I've got a confession to make. I know I always say I'm a Vegas girl because that's my hometown and I love a little glitz and glamour.

Speaker 10 But about seven years ago, I fell in love with a man from New Orleans and I found myself in a long-distance relationship. Listener, don't fear, this one's a really nice guy.

Speaker 10 But the deal was, I would spend more time out of Las Vegas if I could have a lot of animals.

Speaker 10 So we purchased a home right outside the city, and I'm happy to report that we have a shitload of chickens, two geese, a lot of ducks, five mini goats, one pet pig, two horses, and one pony.

Speaker 10 Oh my gosh, and we have two cats. Come here Mabel, come meet Aunt Anna.

Speaker 10 For the past week, I've been introducing my producer Anna to my menagerie.

Speaker 17 And this is one of our cats, Ferguson.

Speaker 10 She's here because she looked like she could do with a good meal, but also because, and you're not going to fucking believe this, Heidi's aunt, she lives just 15 minutes down the road from me.

Speaker 10 I mean, you can't make this shit up.

Speaker 10 When it comes to people being connected through the show, this feels like the craziest example, you know, down the road from where you are.

Speaker 19 But they're down the road.

Speaker 10 We're just going, we're only four minutes away.

Speaker 6 Like, this is crazy.

Speaker 10 Throughout the series, we've said that we want to learn who our lost sister is, but all we could find were gruesome details about her death.

Speaker 10 And today, we're hoping to find out about how she lived from the people who knew her and loved her.

Speaker 10 Oh, it says.

Speaker 11 Isn't that cute?

Speaker 13 Adorable home.

Speaker 11 Look at how cute that is.

Speaker 10 Is that a dinosaur in the...

Speaker 10 I think that's a bird.

Speaker 11 Okay.

Speaker 11 Could have been a dinosaur.

Speaker 11 I keep my glasses on.

Speaker 10 We get out of the car and walk through an old wooden gate. towards a clapboard building with a porch and a rocking chair.

Speaker 10 The front yard is full of luscious greenery that's dripping from the heavy Louisiana rainfall.

Speaker 10 Hi, I'm Carol. Carol, hello.

Speaker 11 I'm happy to meet you. Nice to meet you, Rita.
Hi, Rita. I love this home.

Speaker 10 We're greeted at the door by Rita or Rusty to friends. She's Heidi's aunt by marriage.
Rusty's one of those beautiful older women who just radiates a gentle, calm warmth and understated wisdom.

Speaker 18 It was a church.

Speaker 10 It was a church?

Speaker 11 It was it?

Speaker 13 You can now tell. I just said it.

Speaker 10 As if we didn't have enough coincidences, back in the day, this converted church, it was called St. Anna.
I mean, come on.

Speaker 10 Rusty has lived here for decades and is the first person to ever call it home. She says you can feel the energy of people in the building and I can believe that.

Speaker 10 She guides us through the house with its navy floorboards and Persian rugs lit up through the stained glass windows. It's absolutely stunning.

Speaker 10 As we're taking it all in, we're joined by Anne.

Speaker 19 I'm Anne.

Speaker 10 I'm Carol.

Speaker 20 So nice to meet you.

Speaker 10 She's Heidi's cousin and Rusty's niece. Her dog says hello too.

Speaker 20 This looks like friendly, but just tell her not to jump.

Speaker 13 This looks like my dog. Hello, yeah, just like she's in the door.

Speaker 2 Yes, just like my dog.

Speaker 10 Anne and Rusty seem to be cut from the same bohemian cloth. Anne's about 11 years older than Heidi.
She's in her early 70s now.

Speaker 10 She's a wood turner and artist and talks about driving around in a van for half the year, seeking adventures while she still can.

Speaker 20 So now we get to where it's warm.

Speaker 11 Okay.

Speaker 10 We're coming to the warm area.

Speaker 10 There on a dining room table, surrounded by fruit salad, hot coffee, and granola bars, are photos of Heidi and her family throughout the years.

Speaker 10 There's one of Heidi as a toddler being cuddled in the back seat of a car.

Speaker 14 She was two there, and I was 12.

Speaker 10 This is Lyle. She's Anne's sister and another cousin of Heidi's.

Speaker 10 Her wavy white hair is effortlessly tied back, and she's wearing a pair of loose-fitting, traditional Nepalese trousers.

Speaker 14 We had a big record of the singing nuns, and we would dance to this song. And there's one in particular we loved.

Speaker 14 And little two-year-old Heidi would go over to the record player, very delicately lift up the needle, put it back on the groove where the song like she never scratched the record, she never missed putting it in the right place.

Speaker 14 I was just amazed at her dexterity. We must have danced to that song like a hundred times.
I think it was the song called Dominique Nico Nica Duti.

Speaker 21 Anyway, you can tell how much we loved each other.

Speaker 12 Yeah.

Speaker 10 This dancing little girl with a family of gorgeous hippies, this isn't the story I was expecting.

Speaker 10 Here with Heidi's relatives, I get a sense of a life she could have led, full of art and color and music. I wish we could tell that story.
But that's not how things worked out for Heidi.

Speaker 10 So what happened?

Speaker 10 To understand that, we first need to learn about Heidi's parents, Tom and Gretchen, who met in California in the early 1960s.

Speaker 20 There was a 10-year age gap. She was 22 and Tom was 32 or whatever.

Speaker 20 And he was not living a life that was about having children or finding a wife.

Speaker 14 My understanding was that he was just kind of a playboy.

Speaker 14 And so I think he just liked to have sex and he liked to go out with different women and he wasn't looking for a relationship and she got pregnant.

Speaker 10 When Tom's mother, who the family all called Nana, found out about the pregnancy, she told Tom that he had to do the right thing and marry Gretchen.

Speaker 10 She felt like it was the only way to give the baby a proper start in life.

Speaker 10 In the photos from their wedding day, Gretchen is six months pregnant in a 60s coat and a beehive hairdo. Tom's in a pale suit holding a glass of champagne.
He looks like a deer in the headlights.

Speaker 10 Heidi's born a few months later in California on January 7th, 1964.

Speaker 10 But within a few months, Tom and Gretchen's marriage is over. and Heidi gets stuck between two miserable parents.

Speaker 18 What struck me about Gretchen was how bitter she was, kind of toxic. And Tom became bitter as well.
But Tom was bitter about a lot of things.

Speaker 18 So both parents, full of that bitterness, really created an environment that wasn't even close to the atmosphere a baby needed. There was no nurturing.
There was no

Speaker 18 making the baby fly up in the air and catch him or having fun or anything like that.

Speaker 10 At one point, a local woman is hired by the family to look after baby Heidi. But before long, according to Heidi's cousins, this woman takes Heidi's nana to one side.

Speaker 10 She tells her that from what she's seen at Gretchen's apartment, she thinks Gretchen will be the death of Heidi and that the family should get rid of her to protect the baby.

Speaker 20 She said, you know,

Speaker 20 I have people in my neighborhood who know how to take care of these kinds of things.

Speaker 11 Oh my gosh.

Speaker 10 So let me get this straight. This devout Christian nanny is suggesting that they put a hit out on Heidi's mom.

Speaker 13 Yeah.

Speaker 20 Nana was shocked. And of course, Nana said no, and, you know, it wasn't even a consideration.

Speaker 10 Nana didn't give up, though. The family tells us that she tried to take custody of Heidi, but was unsuccessful.

Speaker 10 So in the end, she did whatever she could to make Heidi's life as normal as possible whenever she came to visit.

Speaker 10 Big family meals with freshly pressed tablecloths, cute girly dresses, riding up and down the curb on a shiny new bike, some money or toys at birthdays and Christmases.

Speaker 10 But back home with Heidi's mom, things weren't as bright.

Speaker 10 The family told us they suspected that Gretchen was working as a sex worker from her apartment.

Speaker 10 They heard from people that she had different men over while Heidi was there, that she only had beer in the fridge. One time the cousins say Heidi came to Nana's house with a cigarette burn on her.

Speaker 10 It's important to point out here that we can't fact-check these claims because we believe Gretchen has passed away and records show that Tom, Heidi's father, died in 2023.

Speaker 10 We do know that Gretchen told the detective who looked into Heidi's case that she was going through a rough patch back then.

Speaker 10 It all came to a head when Heidi was five. Gretchen turned up at Tom's front door one day and said she couldn't deal with raising Heidi anymore.

Speaker 10 She then walked away and left the little girl to live with her equally uninterested father.

Speaker 20 Tom did come home at night, and Heidi had learned by six or seven to take a frozen dinner out of the freezer and turn on the oven and make it for herself.

Speaker 10 Heidi's cousins, Lyle and Robert, show us some more pictures of Heidi.

Speaker 14 She's not so old in this picture, and you can see that face is someone's gone through some.

Speaker 22 Yeah.

Speaker 22 She was just obviously really lonely.

Speaker 10 I mean, you look at these photos and there is like a clear change. Yeah.
You know, she is just a normal, happy, cute kid when she's like two, three, and these ones.

Speaker 10 And then there is something about her eyes that just goes.

Speaker 14 Yeah, that's what I say. I feel like if we put all these pictures in chronological order, you almost see the light go out in her eyes.

Speaker 10 At school, Heidi's teachers noticed there was something wrong too. In one of her report cards from first grade, it says, she almost never smiles.

Speaker 10 I believe she needs a great deal of affection right now.

Speaker 10 But there are also signs of Heidi's creativity and potential. One of her teachers says she was an excellent reader who loved the chronicles of Narnia.

Speaker 10 They also say she was a talented writer, producing many fine stories and poems with the wit and humor that was unique to her.

Speaker 10 There are moments in these reports that show flashes of Heidi's personality, a headstrong young girl who simply wastes too much time doing what she pleases instead of paying attention.

Speaker 10 One report from 1972, when she was eight, says that if Heidi continues receiving the love, help, and understanding she has seen from school and home, then I believe she will make even greater social progress.

Speaker 10 But the love she received at home didn't come from her dad. That was all Nana, who continued to play a key maternal role in Heidi's life.

Speaker 10 Especially at Christmas, when Heidi would go and visit, there are real sweet photos of her sitting on Santa's knee that feel like glimpses of childhood joy.

Speaker 10 One time, Heidi's Aunt Rusty remembers when they were all at Nana and Grampy's house.

Speaker 18 Grampy was kind of a grumpy.

Speaker 18 He was the one who decorated the tree every year. That was his tradition.
And the tree that he brought in that year had a bird in it, a live bird.

Speaker 10 Grampy rescues the bird from the tree and brings it outside. But while he's gone, Nana said, let's have some fun.

Speaker 1 So they started decorating the tree.

Speaker 21 Griffy was gone.

Speaker 18 And Heidi was delighted. It was just wonderful to see her spirit dancing around.
Let's be naughty.

Speaker 10 But then the worst thing that could happen happened.

Speaker 10 Grampy retired and decided he wanted to move to Florida, 1,100 miles away from Ohio.

Speaker 14 Nana just was wringing her hands about moving so far away from Heidi.

Speaker 10 But Grampy's word was law in their relationship, and she had no choice but to go.

Speaker 14 So there was no longer visits to Nana's house where there really was stability and home-cooked meals.

Speaker 10 By 1972, Heidi loses regular contact with the most important and loving figure in her life.

Speaker 10 A few years later, in 1976, the family are gathered together for a golden wedding party. Looking at a photo from the day, you can see 12-year-old Heidi, who looks like a young Jodi Foster.

Speaker 10 But to her cousins, she seems almost unrecognizable. She's already had several run-ins with the law and is experiencing things that her older cousins can't even imagine.

Speaker 14 She was worried that she was pregnant and that she might have hepatitis from shooting up with a dirty needle. I went into shock.

Speaker 14 I felt like I'd gone from being the cousin who's 10 years older who can lead the dancing to feeling like I was a country bumpkin who had no experience.

Speaker 10 It was clear to everyone that Heidi was on a downward spiral and her father, Tom, seemed to be doing nothing to stop it. Around that time, her aunt Rusty stepped in.

Speaker 10 She moved Heidi in with her and her family.

Speaker 18 You know, I thought, well, I could help her.

Speaker 18 And I tried to give her some ground rules while we were at the house, and she resisted everything. It was this bubble that she was in, it seemed, that couldn't be penetrated.

Speaker 10 So she really protected herself like with a shield of armor around her.

Speaker 19 She did.

Speaker 10 Eventually, Heidi was forced to attend a reform school in Ohio. And for a while, she was doing well.

Speaker 10 Heidi seemed to thrive with a bit of discipline and structure. She was a naturally bright young girl and started advancing in her education again.

Speaker 22 And then the story goes that Tom came to visit her.

Speaker 10 This is Robert.

Speaker 22 And he took her away. He took her back.

Speaker 22 Tom had this thing about

Speaker 22 bucking the system, you know, fuck the man.

Speaker 22 He hated any kind of authority. And so I think he valued that in Heidi too and encouraged it.

Speaker 10 Back in Toledo with her dad, Heidi wanted out. At just 14 years old, she told her dad dad Tom she was moving to California to follow her dreams of being an actress and a model.

Speaker 10 She said she could get a ride with some long-distance truck drivers she had met. Heidi's family couldn't believe Tom was okay with it.

Speaker 22 You can't allow your daughter to just go and get in a car with anyone.

Speaker 11 These are grown men.

Speaker 22 You can't do it. You can't do it.
And he's just like got this dumbass smile and a drink in his hand and a pipe. He was in a weird way proud of her independence.

Speaker 10 But there was no talking to Tom or to Heidi.

Speaker 10 And so, in 1978, with her dad's consent, 14-year-old Heidi gets in a truck with this random guy and sets off to make it big in California.

Speaker 2 Life's messy. We're talking spills, stains, pets, and kids.
But with Anibay, you never have to stress about messes again.

Speaker 2 At washablesofas.com, discover Anibay Sofas, the only fully machine-washable sofas inside and out, starting at just $699.

Speaker 2 Made with liquid and stain-resistant fabrics. That means fewer stains and more peace of mind.

Speaker 2 Designed for real life, our sofas feature changeable fabric covers, allowing you to refresh your style anytime. Need flexibility? Our modular design lets you rearrange your sofa effortlessly.

Speaker 2 Perfect for cozy apartments or spacious homes. Plus, they're earth-friendly and built to last.
That's why over 200,000 happy customers have made the switch. Upgrade your space today.

Speaker 2 Visit washable sofas.com now and bring home a sofa made for life. That's washablesofas.com.
Offers are subject to change and certain restrictions may apply.

Speaker 4 Parking shouldn't slow you down.

Speaker 5 ParkWiz gives every driver a a shortcut.

Speaker 7 Book ahead, save up to 50%, and skip the hassle of circling the block.

Speaker 5 Park smarter, park faster, ParkWiz.

Speaker 8 Download the ParkWiz app today and save every time you park.

Speaker 24 Major League Volleyball, a new unified league where the game's brightest stars compete at the highest level.

Speaker 23 The most established women's pro volleyball league in the U.S.

Speaker 24 is on fire.

Speaker 23 But we're just warming up. Every serve, every spike, every moment.

Speaker 25 Don't miss the action.

Speaker 23 MLV Season 3, January 2026. Join the movement at ProVolleyball.com and follow MLV on Instagram and YouTube.

Speaker 17 Not all group chats are the same, just like not all Adams are the same.

Speaker 28 Adam Brody, for example, uses WhatsApp to plan his grandma's birthday using video calls, polls to choose a gift, and HD photos to document a family moment to remember, all in one group chat.

Speaker 28 Makes grandma's birthday her best one yet. But Adam Scott group messages with an app that isn't WhatsApp.
And so the photo invite came through so blurry, he never even knew about the party.

Speaker 22 Yeah, grandma still won't talk to me.

Speaker 28 It's time for WhatsApp.

Speaker 27 Message privately with everyone.

Speaker 10 California was the furthest 14-year-old Heidi Balch had ever been from her family. Like so many other teen girls, she had aspirations of being a star, an actress, or maybe a model.

Speaker 10 She didn't have all the details figured out yet. Heidi's family don't know much about her life at this point, but what they do know is that she never made it big in Hollywood.

Speaker 10 We're pretty sure that she didn't book any acting gigs, and she decided that at 5'1 ⁇ , she was too short to make it as a catalog model.

Speaker 10 So at age 16, Heidi packs up her life and once again with her father's blessing, she decides to move. This time to New York City.

Speaker 10 When Heidi arrives in the Big Apple, her dreams have changed. Well, kind of.
Because of her height, she thinks she might have better luck as a hand and face model.

Speaker 10 So she starts putting a portfolio together.

Speaker 10 Picturing a 16-year-old Heidi alone in New York, it makes me think of my own daughter. When she was 16, she was still in school.
She was learning to drive a car and starting to think about colleges.

Speaker 10 As a mother, it's hard for me to understand how anyone could let their child go off alone into a city as dangerous as New York in the 80s.

Speaker 10 Heidi no doubt considered herself pretty street-wise, and in a lot of ways she was. But she was also just a kid in need of some love and guidance.

Speaker 10 According to her family, Heidi's dad paid the rent on a studio apartment for her, but he never visited. Heidi was left to fend for herself.

Speaker 10 Her life became increasingly turbulent. She was falling deeper into the throes of drug addiction and she got arrested multiple times.

Speaker 10 According to her cousin Robert, who was living in New York at the time, within a few years of being in the city, Heidi found herself in the infamous island jail, Rikers, for robbery and assault.

Speaker 22 Heidi was a top character by that point, so she prided herself in knowing how to navigate being in Rikers.

Speaker 22 And she would ask for different things like socks and cigarettes, whatever, underpants, and she could barter, use them to her advantage. But she took real pride in being able to handle herself.

Speaker 10 After Heidi came out of Rikers when she was around 21, her family arranged for her to go to Florida for a few months to stay with Nana.

Speaker 10 While there, she spoke about getting clean and even got her high school GED.

Speaker 10 But this brief respite from her life in New York didn't last. Once she returned to the city, she fell back into her old ways.

Speaker 10 She'd stop by and visit her family who were living in the city every once in a while for dinner or to get a few extra bucks, but they weren't seeing very much of her.

Speaker 10 A lot of her life was a mystery to them.

Speaker 22 We knew she was addicted to drugs and

Speaker 22 using her sexuality in some way.

Speaker 20 She was really on the downward spiral. And it may have even been around a discussion about being a sex worker.

Speaker 20 She just came out with this statement. She said, well, you know I'm a lesbian.

Speaker 10 But after coming out as a lesbian, Heidi suddenly marries a man.

Speaker 20 She met

Speaker 20 this guy who was attempting to get a green card and struck a deal.

Speaker 10 Allegedly, he gave Heidi $1,500 to marry him. It seems very much like a business transaction.
As far as we know, there was no real relationship.

Speaker 10 Heidi's addiction continued to spiral. At various points in the mid to late 80s, her family tried to step in.

Speaker 20 I was living in New York and my parents, Heidi's aunt and uncle,

Speaker 20 were making one more effort to try to get her into drug rehabilitation.

Speaker 20 And the last night before she said she would go and my folks were going to take her,

Speaker 20 They had gotten a hotel room about a half a block away from where they lived.

Speaker 20 I remember being in the hotel room and

Speaker 20 Heidi was

Speaker 20 going into the bathroom like every 20 minutes. And, you know, it was sort of obvious that she was taking drugs.

Speaker 20 She was using needles and heroin by that point.

Speaker 20 And I remember seeing her legs and her arms in that way that really advanced drug addicts have pustules of sores

Speaker 20 and it was already that she had had an AIDS diagnosis

Speaker 20 and

Speaker 20 she wanted a smoothie

Speaker 20 And I said, well, I can go over to Orange Julius, you know, one of those corner store places in New York, and get you one.

Speaker 20 And she said,

Speaker 20 you know I'm organic.

Speaker 12 That's great.

Speaker 20 And it was just so funny.

Speaker 9 Like it was like, oh my God,

Speaker 12 she's organic.

Speaker 20 And she wasn't there the next morning.

Speaker 2 Tired of spills and stains on your sofa?

Speaker 2 WashableSofas.com has your back, featuring the Anibay Collection, the only designer sofa that's machine-washable inside and out, where designer quality meets budget-friendly prices.

Speaker 2 That's right, sofas started just $699.

Speaker 2 Enjoy a no-risk experience with pet-friendly, stain-resistant, and changeable slip covers made with performance fabrics.

Speaker 2 Experience cloud-like comfort with high-resilience foam that's hypoallergenic and never needs fluffing. The sturdy steel frame ensures longevity, and the modular pieces can be rearranged anytime.

Speaker 2 Check out washablesofas.com and get up to 60% off your Anabay sofa, backed by a 30-day satisfaction guarantee. If you're not absolutely in love, send it back for a full refund.

Speaker 2 No return shipping or restocking fees. Every penny back.
Upgrade now at washablesofas.com. Offers are subject to change and certain restrictions may apply.

Speaker 4 Parking shouldn't slow you down.

Speaker 5 ParkWiz gives every driver a shortcut.

Speaker 7 Book ahead, save up to 50%, and skip the hassle of circling the block.

Speaker 5 Park smarter, park faster, ParkWiz.

Speaker 8 Download the ParkWiz app today and save every time you park.

Speaker 24 Major League Volleyball, a new unified league where the game's brightest stars compete at the highest level.

Speaker 23 The most established women's pro volleyball league in the U.S.

Speaker 24 is on fire.

Speaker 23 But we're just warming up. Every serve, every spike, every moment, don't miss the action.

Speaker 25 MLV Season 3, January 2026.

Speaker 23 Join the movement at ProVolleyball.com and follow MLV on Instagram and YouTube.

Speaker 17 Not all group chats are the same, just like not all Adams are the same.

Speaker 28 Adam Brody, for example, uses WhatsApp to plan his grandma's birthday using video calls, polls to choose a gift, and HD photos to document a family moment to remember, all in one group chat.

Speaker 28 Makes grandma's birthday her best one yet. But Adam Scott grouped messages with an app that isn't WhatsApp.
And so, the photo invite came through so blurry, he never even knew about the party.

Speaker 22 And Grandma still won't talk to me.

Speaker 10 It's time for WhatsApp.

Speaker 27 Message privately with everyone.

Speaker 10 Heidi's life in New York was, to put it mildly, unpredictable. But in amongst all the chaos, there was one person in her life that she would never bail on, her beloved Nana.

Speaker 10 Every January on her birthday, Heidi would call Nana and they'd catch up a little.

Speaker 20 And Nana would say, oh, I want to send you a check and, you know, it's so nice to hear from you. And, you know, it was kind of a way to know that she was alive and well.

Speaker 14 And it was 1990 when she doesn't call Nana. And now it's been a year almost.
And so everybody was knowing something's going on.

Speaker 20 Increasingly worrying for heidi's welfare nana reaches out to heidi's green card husband to see if he's heard from her and he said oh yeah she's fine you know she's over on the alphabet land avenue a and i haven't really seen her seen her but i know other people have seen her and just led nana on that went on for a number of years and so nana was not suspecting anymore she believed it and said oh well she's just like in more trouble than, you know,

Speaker 20 she's on drugs because the fake husband was reassuring Nana for his own self-interest that she was alive.

Speaker 20 Nana died in 1996,

Speaker 20 so

Speaker 20 she never knew whether Heidi was really missing or not.

Speaker 10 And probably it was better that way for Nana.

Speaker 20 Oh, without a doubt.

Speaker 10 When Nana died, these calls stopped, and Heidi's family were left wondering what happened to her. Robert tried to console himself with fantasies of Heidi having turned her life around.

Speaker 22 My narrative, the thing that I hope, was that she joined a cult, and she was like in Arizona and changed her name to Sunbeam, and, you know, she was gotten clean and healthy.

Speaker 10 But as time went on, nobody had spoken directly with Heidi for several years. The family began to wonder whether something serious had happened.

Speaker 10 Throughout the 90s, the family tried to make Heidi's father, Tom, file a missing person's report, but he refused.

Speaker 14 Because of his dislike of any authority, like that's why he kept telling our mom, no, don't report it yet. Somehow he maybe was scared or just disliked the police so much or something.

Speaker 10 I can't understand how any parent could go years without knowing if their child is alive or dead and do nothing.

Speaker 10 The rest of the family felt torn. They were desperately worried for Heidi's welfare, but they wanted to respect Tom's wishes as her father, so they stood by.

Speaker 10 Until eventually, in 2001, Heidi's Aunt Robin took matters into her own hands.

Speaker 20 My mother just couldn't stand it anymore. And so

Speaker 20 she just decided I have to report her missing.

Speaker 10 Over the years, the family checked in with the police, but there was no sign of Heidi anywhere. There also wasn't any media attention, not like there was in Gail's case.

Speaker 10 Heidi's face didn't appear on the news or on a milk carton under missing.

Speaker 10 I have to wonder if it's because Heidi was a sex worker and a drug addict. She wasn't a perfect victim.
And maybe she reflected back at people the kind of life they wanted to hide away from.

Speaker 10 Given how much Heidi means to me, to Anna, to Mindy, to Elaine, to all of us girlfriends, it's heartbreaking to think that for so long, her story was just ignored.

Speaker 10 Until 2013, when Heidi's Aunt Robin gets a very important visit.

Speaker 14 Four Hopewell detectives knocked on her door and said, could this be your niece?

Speaker 20 My mother took one look at the pictures and she said, that's Heidi.

Speaker 10 This was when the family learned that Heidi was dead and that the serial killer Joel Rifkin was responsible for her murder.

Speaker 22 And then my sister Ann,

Speaker 22 she got right on the computer and started investigating. And

Speaker 22 she tells me, you know, Heidi was decapitated.

Speaker 10 It was all so much darker, so much more heartbreaking than they ever could have imagined.

Speaker 22 I mean, it was one of those moments of where were you when you found out when the towers came down or whatever.

Speaker 14 It was definitely shocking.

Speaker 11 It was...

Speaker 14 I mean, it kind of knocked my breath out.

Speaker 10 Trying to come to terms with what's happened, the family seek out as much information as they can. They come across old news articles about Heidi's death before she was identified.

Speaker 10 Articles they may have read a few years previously without knowing the connection they had.

Speaker 14 I think I saw the headline that said,

Speaker 14 head has AIDS.

Speaker 9 And

Speaker 21 I just felt like I couldn't

Speaker 12 talk about it or

Speaker 14 I just didn't, you know, I didn't know how to process it. I didn't know what to do with it.

Speaker 10 The callous and dismissive way Heidi was spoken about by the press after her death is a fucked up mirror image of the way Joel Rifkin saw her and his other victims.

Speaker 10 He spoke about it in the book, From the Mouth of a Monster.

Speaker 14 I didn't read the whole book, but I have it in my mind that he said, well, I picked these kind of girls because no one's looking for them. They don't have families that care.
And that just...

Speaker 14 Felt like a dagger in my heart to be, well,

Speaker 14 how long did it take for us to report it?

Speaker 14 We wouldn't have known like within a week or two because we weren't, no one was in that close touch with her. But by that summer, we could have said

Speaker 14 we should get some help in case we can't find her. You know, if we had reported it,

Speaker 9 maybe

Speaker 14 it would have led to him being caught.

Speaker 14 There'd be 16 other women still alive.

Speaker 10 Lyle, Robert, and Ann have been trying to figure out how their cousin, the girl they shared Christmases with, who played the dancing nuns on repeat until the record nearly wore out, who had dreams of being a star, how it is that she could have gone down such a different road to them.

Speaker 14 It makes me realize that intact,

Speaker 12 consistent, reliable

Speaker 12 love that

Speaker 14 our parents gave us, how valuable that is, how important that is. Like, I could be right where Heidi was if I had had Uncle Tom.

Speaker 22 I mean, she did, she did have love from Nana. Yeah.

Speaker 22 And whatever Tom, in a weird way, there were little pockets of him, you know.

Speaker 12 So

Speaker 22 she wasn't completely deprived. I'm not, it's, it's,

Speaker 22 we're just still trying to sort it out and figure it out, like, how does a life go

Speaker 22 so wrong? You know,

Speaker 22 how does that happen?

Speaker 10 After the 2013 police investigation, all of Heidi's remains, including her torso, were finally reunited and cremated as one.

Speaker 10 The family had some kind of closure, but what they didn't know until we came along was that Heidi's torso had been buried for nearly 10 years in the grave of Gail Katz.

Speaker 10 So we thought it fitting to introduce them to the woman who visited her all those years, Gail's sister, Elaine.

Speaker 2 Hi. Hi.

Speaker 16 We have something terrible in common.

Speaker 20 I am so sorry.

Speaker 16 Thank you.

Speaker 16 I am so sorry to you.

Speaker 19 Oh, thank you.

Speaker 20 You know, I think that it's only since we got connected with Anna and learned the story of the misidentified torso

Speaker 20 and realized that there was a lot of peace that we have felt knowing that somebody loved her and buried her and that she was cared about for a period of time when for 25 years it was a total mystery.

Speaker 16 You know, Heidi's torso gave my family an enormous amount of peace and closure burying her. We finally felt that, you know, we had some part

Speaker 16 of my sister back.

Speaker 16 So thank you for lending her to me and my family.

Speaker 18 That's a big heart that you have.

Speaker 10 We

Speaker 20 know and appreciate that there was loving energy going her way.

Speaker 18 In Heidi's story, that means a lot.

Speaker 10 As we end the call with Elaine, the Louisiana sky is getting dark. Still strewn across the table in front of us are the documents and photographs.
It gives us snapshots into Heidi's too short life.

Speaker 10 And it might be the rainstorm or maybe the spirits in the house that Rusty talked about, but the lights start to flicker on and off, and the conversation turns to what Heidi would make of all of this.

Speaker 20 At one point, when she was in her teen years, she said to me,

Speaker 20 You know, what I really want is to be on the cover of a magazine and have my mother see me on the cover of a magazine when I'm famous.

Speaker 20 Like the motivation was to be discovered by her mother.

Speaker 11 Yeah.

Speaker 20 And she's not a famous hand model or an actress who's doing brilliant work, but maybe this is the legacy we've been waiting for. Maybe this is

Speaker 20 being on the cover of the magazine in some weird way.

Speaker 20 And I think she will be represented now

Speaker 20 with a story that's more than the blood and gore on the internet.

Speaker 19 I'm glad that you all are telling it.

Speaker 18 I also have the sense that the girlfriends are growing in numbers.

Speaker 19 Yes.

Speaker 19 And

Speaker 9 count me in.

Speaker 9 Yeah.

Speaker 12 I love that.

Speaker 10 I'd like to think that Gail and Heidi are just friends somewhere in the ethers.

Speaker 18 I was thinking that too, in the ethers.

Speaker 18 But maybe it was like a destiny kind of thing.

Speaker 20 And a divine intervention.

Speaker 10 Today, Heidi's ashes are scattered underneath a palm tree somewhere in Florida. It's nice to imagine her there, soaking up the sun, finally at peace.

Speaker 10 I'm back on the shores of Staten Island, where Heidi first entered our story. Mindy and Anna are with me.

Speaker 10 The three of us are gathered here one final time. in this beautiful, slightly melancholy spot to say goodbye.

Speaker 10 We started this journey with one mission, to find our lost sister. And now that we've not only found her, but named her too, we're here to give her a proper send-off.

Speaker 10 So we're going to do it in the only way we know how. Very Jewish, a little slapdash, but with a lot of heart.

Speaker 10 In the Jewish tradition, if you visit a grave site, you leave a stone. And I think we should leave a stone here.

Speaker 10 I love that.

Speaker 11 Let's leave a stone.

Speaker 10 Where are you going to place it?

Speaker 10 I'm going to go down there.

Speaker 10 Walking right out to the water's edge, Mindy gently lays down the stone. Is that something you say when you do this normally? You say Yitzkur.

Speaker 10 Yitzkur is a special memorial prayer for the departed where you say the name of the dead you wish to honor. It means may God remember, but sadly and a little ironically, we don't remember the words.

Speaker 10 Hey Siri, can you say yes score?

Speaker 10 Okay, how to get your credit report now.

Speaker 10 We warned you, slapdash, but eventually Mindy finds what she's looking for. So dear listener, we'd like you to join us in taking a moment to remember Heidi Balch.

Speaker 10 Okay, you ready?

Speaker 10 Amen Se Menufona

Speaker 10 Tachatan Fe

Speaker 10 Hashikina

Speaker 10 Ma'alohedoshim

Speaker 10 Kedoshim

Speaker 10 Gezarim

Speaker 10 Behirim

Speaker 10 Etenoshem

Speaker 10 Heidi

Speaker 10 Okay.

Speaker 22 Oh, that's a long one.

Speaker 10 Yeah, it's enough.

Speaker 10 There's got to be a shorter one.

Speaker 10 I'd like to imagine that Heidi and Gail are looking down on us from the ethers.

Speaker 10 Both of them laughing at me, Mindy, and Anna as we awkwardly make our way off the beach, leaving behind two unassuming stones just on the water's edge, one for Heidi

Speaker 10 and one for Gail.

Speaker 10 This story is for all of us. It's for Gail and for her sister Elaine.
It's for Anne and Rusty and Lyle and Robert. But most of all, this story is for Heidi Balch, who is no longer our lost sister.

Speaker 10 Because we found you, Heidi, and we will never forget you.

Speaker 10 The Girlfriend's Our Lost Sister is produced by Novel for iHeart podcasts. For more from Novel, visit novel.audio.
The show is hosted by me, Carol Fisher, and our chief investigator is Mindy Shapiro.

Speaker 10 To find me on social media, search Carol A. Fisher.
That's Carol with an E.

Speaker 10 The season is written and produced by Anna Sinfield and Lee Meyer. Our assistant producer is Madeline Parr.
The editor is Joe Wheeler. Max O'Brien is our executive producer.

Speaker 10 Our fact-checker is Dania Suleiman.

Speaker 10 Production management from Cherie Houston and Charlotte Wolf. Sound design, mixing, and scoring by Daniel Kempson and Nicholas Alexander.

Speaker 10 Music supervision by Anna Sinfield and Nicholas Alexander.

Speaker 10 Original music composed and performed by Louisa Gerstein and produced by Louisa Gerstein and Nicholas Alexander. The series artwork was designed by Christina Limkool.

Speaker 10 Story development by Anna Sinfield. Willard Foxton is Creative Director of Development.
Our executive producers at iHeart Podcast are Katrina Norvell and Nikki Itor.

Speaker 10 Special thanks to Cantor Daniela Gessenheit and Leona Hamid, plus Ellie Cantor, Carrie Lieberman, and Will Pearson at iHeart Podcast, as well as Carly Frankel and the whole team at WME.

Speaker 10 And a special shout out to Vince Hayward, my life partner in True Crime, for taking on the role of Girlfriend's confidant and lead tech support.

Speaker 10 The Girlfriends will return with a brand new story and a new host soon.

Speaker 2 tired of spills and stains on your sofa?

Speaker 2 WashableSofas.com has your back, featuring the Anibay Collection, the only designer sofa that's machine washable inside and out, where designer quality meets budget-friendly prices.

Speaker 2 That's right, sofas started just $699.

Speaker 2 Enjoy a no-risk experience with pet-friendly, stain-resistant, and changeable slip covers made with performance fabrics.

Speaker 2 Experience cloud-like comfort with high-resilience foam that's hypoallergenic and never needs fluffing. The sturdy steel frame ensures longevity, and the modular pieces can be rearranged anytime.

Speaker 2 Check out washablesofas.com and get up to 60% off your Anabay sofa, backed by a 30-day satisfaction guarantee. If you're not absolutely in love, send it back for a full refund.

Speaker 2 No return shipping or restocking fees. Every penny back.
Upgrade now at washablesofas.com. Offers are subject to change and certain restrictions may apply.

Speaker 4 Parking shouldn't slow you down.

Speaker 5 ParkWiz gives every driver a shortcut.

Speaker 7 Book ahead, save up to 50%, and skip the hassle of circling the block.

Speaker 5 Park smarter, park faster, ParkWiz.

Speaker 8 Download the ParkWiz app today and save every time you park.

Speaker 24 Major League Volleyball, a new unified league where the game's brightest stars compete at the highest level.

Speaker 23 The most established women's pro volleyball league in the U.S.

Speaker 24 is on fire.

Speaker 23 But we're just warming up. Every serve, every spike, every moment, don't miss the action.

Speaker 25 MLV Season 3, January 2026.

Speaker 23 Join the movement at ProVolleyball.com and follow MLV on Instagram and YouTube.

Speaker 2 Top Reasons Your Career Wants You to Move to Ohio. So many amazing growth opportunities, high-paying jobs in technology, advanced manufacturing, engineering, life sciences, and more.

Speaker 2 You'll soar to new heights, just like the Wright brothers, John Glenn, even Neil Armstrong. Their careers all took off in Ohio, and yours can too.

Speaker 2 A job that can take you farther and a place you can't wait to come home to. Have it all in the heart of it all.
Launch your search at callohiohome.com.

Speaker 1 This is an iHeart podcast.