Best of The Program | Guest: Mike Pompeo | 6/15/21

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Hey, it's Pat Gray for Stu on the Glenn Beck Program.

Today on the podcast, we'll speak with Mike Pompeo and talk about CAVPAC or the Champion American Values PAC.

Their goal is to support conservative candidates ahead of the midterm election and the 2024 presidential election.

Also, President Biden continues to make the U.S.

look bad while he's hanging around the Europeans at the G7 summit.

A local Fox reporter revealed on air that she's been secretly working with Project Veritas and is working towards exposing the company for silencing the reporters.

Apparently, she's going to release behind-the-scenes footage.

We'll also look at what cases the Supreme Court is taking on soon.

And finally, Glenn is hosting his first art show in Park City, the Park City Fine Art, with all proceeds going to Mercury One and the American Journey Experience Museum.

And guarantee, that'll be better than Hunter Biden's finger paintings.

All this and lots more coming up today on the podcast.

You're listening to the best of the Glenbeck program.

I am thrilled to have the former U.S.

Secretary of State, former CIA director, and chairman of CAVPAC, which he'll talk about here in just a second, Mike Pompeo on with us.

Hello, Mike.

How are you?

Good morning, Glenn.

It's great to be with you on your show today.

Thank you very much.

I appreciate it.

And I really

sincerely mean I really appreciate everything you have done for the country and honestly for the world, especially Israel and the Middle East.

What you guys pulled off is absolutely amazing.

And I hate to see it torpedoed like it's being, but thank you for that.

Well, Glenn, thank you for the kind words.

We did do good work, important work for the American people, important work for the people of Israel in the relationship between our two countries.

It has been I'll be honest, it has been a tough 140 or whatever the heck number of days it is to watch them already begin to undo what was really going to create prosperity and peace in the region.

I think the Abraham Accords will withstand it, but it's going to take a lot of effort, a lot of effort from people who are diligent in making sure that those relationships don't deteriorate under this administration.

I have to tell you,

you know,

Joe Biden, even going in to meet with Putin, is a little like Minnie Mouse trying to have a civil conversation with Pegleg Pete.

I mean,

there's no strength there at all.

No strength.

How do you suggest those meetings are going to go?

There's a lot of risk, Glenn.

These are high-stakes things.

I watched President Trump go through it when I met with Chairman Kim.

These were big events, and you had to be ready.

It was really sad because the setup is always so important.

Here, the setup was we began by joining the Paris Climate Accords, telling Vladimir Putin he'll be the world's biggest energy producer and by lifting some sanctions on some of his buddies.

It's not that we can't find places we can work with Vladimir Putin.

We certainly did.

But you got to be clear and you got to be tough, and you have to be cognizant of the risks and the malignant activities engaged in.

I fear that that's not what what we're

that's not what we're going to see in these next 24 hours in this meeting.

I have to tell you, I don't know if I'm sure you did see what the

president of Poland said, but he's like, nobody in America is consulting with us, and

Biden is no Reagan, and Putin is not Gorbachev, and we're going to be the ones that pay the price.

You know, it's especially

poignant coming from the Poles.

You remember, Glenn, there was the Poles and

Lekwa Lessa and

Pope John Paul II and Ronald Reagan who crushed the tyranny from the Soviet Union.

And to hear the Poles now saying they fear that the United States is not going to be up to the task is really a historical miss and dangerous not only for the Poles in Eastern Europe, but for us as well.

So we have so much to cover in so little time.

So let me just go through a couple of things.

The ransomware attacks.

I've never heard a president say, well, it's a private issue and the president should just, or I mean, these companies, they have to decide whether they pay the blackmail.

Stunning.

Can you tell me...

Go ahead.

Yeah, this is an attack on America.

And it came through a commercial

attack, right?

It came through an attack on a commercial enterprise, but the capacity for pipelines to move product around our East Coast is an American national security interest to suggest for a moment that we're going to hand this over to some private entity.

Oh, goodness, it's about like handing over your social media to these big old nasty social media companies.

We have to help these businesses protect their systems, and then it has to be a national effort to impose costs on those who put American lives at risk by denying us the ability to move product around our country.

Aaron Powell,

is there a strong enough connection between these hackers and Putin that we know Putin at least knows about it and is okaying it with a wink and a nod?

Well, and I can't tell you about this particular

incident and what we know because I was out of government, but what I can say this, all the hallmarks of what took place here suggest this is some folks who are operating from Russian soil in a space that is almost certainly underwritten by one of Vladimir Putin's buddies, the oligarch system,

and Putin at the very least is turning a blind eye to it and probably more.

And so it's it's appropriate to hold Vladimir Putin and the Russians accountable for the actions taking place inside of their own country.

And we've got to do it, and there are tools by which we can.

Let me just quickly,

it looks like,

well, it doesn't look like.

I know it just happened.

State Department was investigating COVID and the Wuhan lab and everything else.

And Biden just took that and shut that down and moved it over to the CIA.

My theory is that that way he doesn't have to release anything because

intelligence can be

held as top secret.

Was there evidence on this Wuhan lab when you were in office?

And are we ever going to hear what really happened?

So Glenn, I have a unique perspective having led both the CIA and the State Department consecutively.

When I was a Secretary of State, when the Wuhan virus was foisted upon the world by the Chinese Communist Party, we began to move heaven and earth to try and figure out what happened.

We had the tools to try and figure out if this wasn't a part of a bioweapons effort on behalf of the CCP, and we learned a lot.

And so, Glenn, while I can't tell your listeners today, we know the answer with certainty.

I am confident that this came from the virology lab.

We know enough to say that.

We also know enough to know they're continuing to cover it up, and so we know plenty to hold them accountable.

There's no evidence this administration wants to confront that.

Three million people dead around the world, hundreds of thousands in the United States.

Families still here in the United States upended by this thing.

Kids having trouble coming out of these lockdown, crazy lockdowns.

The Chinese Communist Party has to be made to pay a price, at the least a price sufficient to make sure they'll do what they can to make sure something like this never happens again.

Talking to

Mike Pompeo,

you are starting

what's called CAVPAC.

CAV, Champion American Values, and also

kind of a tip of the hat to your time in the Army as a cavalry

officer.

But it's CAVPAC, and it is looking to

get real conservatives and real conservative candidates into the 2022 cycle.

Tell me about it.

So Glenn, I was a businessman in Kansas back in twenty ten when Barack Obama was taking our country in the wrong direction.

I gave up that wonderful life with my family back in Kansas to go run for Congress to throw Nancy Pelosi out.

This effort is in those same lines.

It's my effort from the place that I find myself today to lead what we've called CAP back.

You're right.

What does CAP do?

It rides to the sound of the gun.

It alerts.

It sounds the siren when there's a real risk to something that matters an awful lot.

And so we're going to go find conservative candidates, true believers in

American workers and our American middle class.

We're going to find them, and we're going to help them be successful getting elected, not just to take back the House and the Senate, but city council races.

We did a state legislative race in New Hampshire last week.

We're helping a fellow out.

We've got to make sure that we drive this message and help good candidates get elected.

And if you go to catpeck.com, I think you'll see there's real action and a real heart for delivering good outcomes for our country.

I'll tell you, Mike, I'm not only looking for people that understand

the average worker and

how business is done, but I'm also looking for somebody who will stand up for the Constitution because that thing is gone.

I mean, we are not following it at all, it seems right now.

And both parties seem to have

seem to play not an equal part, but a part in ignoring it when they want

Glenn, there's no doubt the party that I've been a part of for decades now has

its own challenges.

We've got to confront them.

We've got to take them on.

When I was at the State Department, we engaged in a mission, to your point,

the State Department lost its way talking about human rights.

It was talking about things that were crazy.

And so we created this commission designed to go back and talk about our founding.

What is it that we really believe in?

Why do we believe in?

How do we put forward these ideas?

Trying to get my diplomats around the world to understand that we shouldn't apologize for America.

It's this exceptional country.

So

we went back and regrounded the work that we were doing.

That's what America needs.

It needs a regrounding in these first principles, the things Glenn, that you and I learned in schools.

We need to go teach them in our schools again.

We're not doing that today.

If we get that wrong,

I joke, but I'm three-quarters serious.

I met with the Taliban.

I met with Chairman Kim.

The biggest risk today is inside of our schools.

If we don't get that right, if we're not brave enough and fearless enough to go stand up and demand that we teach our kids about the greatness of our nation, then this next generation will take us to a path where, you know, as our founders knew, we could lose the Republic.

So, yesterday,

I'm big on the great reset from the World Economic Forum.

I mean, almost every politician around the world in the West is using Build Back Better,

which is from the World Economic Forum.

Yesterday, Biden gave a speech, and I'm going going to talk about it here in a few minutes, but he gave a speech and he said, you know,

for us to be able to best China, we all have to work together.

Then he went through the stated goals.

All of them were right directly from the great reset in the

World Economic Forum.

Do you think that there's

an effort underway that these corporations and the the government are starting to put a little private-public partnership together.

Biden

continuously says, you know, it's a test.

We're going to see in the next couple of years

whether or not a democracy like ours can survive against these authoritarian states.

They can just move quickly.

Glenn, it saddens me when I hear that.

That's the story, you know, when President Biden talks about going,

we're back.

He means back to Barack Obama.

That story that you hear is managing American decline.

We can't, this is not America.

We're going to win this.

We've got to get it right, and we have to be fearless in doing so.

When I hear them say that China presents a challenge, a challenge is figuring out whether you want to go to the store at 10 o'clock or 11 o'clock.

The threat is the Chinese Communist Party.

And I saw in the statement that came out this week, you know, it's okay, but it doesn't doesn't begin to comprehend the threat that the Chinese Communist Party presents.

And Glenn, you know this.

It'll take American leadership to get this right.

We're going to have to demonstrate that our businesses are prepared to sacrifice and our businesses are prepared to be the technology leaders.

And we're not going to suffer the Chinese Communist Party censorship and cancellation for our American companies.

We're going to demand fair and free trade.

If we get those things right, Glenn, America is going to push back against this threat from Xi Jinping and his commie buddies.

We can do it.

We've done it before.

And it's just going to take American leadership to get it right.

Sadly, we don't have a president that I think is prepared to do that today.

Do you stay in touch with President Trump?

And if so, how's he doing?

I do.

He's doing great.

He wants to be part of the fight in the same way I'm trying to work every day to be part of the fight.

He knows that the things that we did these past four years made lives for ordinary Americans better.

I think he's saddened to see what they've done in these first hundred days, too.

We knew we knew when you got President Biden, Biden, we knew what we were in for.

I don't think any of us believed that the left had captured him so much that they would move this far, this left, this fast.

And so time is nigh.

We got to get after it.

We got to win in 2022 and shorten the runway.

All right.

So you are looking for people that want to run and need some help and some advice.

You're looking for anybody who is running in 2022 at CAVPAC, C-A-V-P-A-C.com, correct?

Correct.

Only conservatives need to apply, Glenn.

Again, Mike, thank you so much for everything that you have done as CIA director and

Secretary of State.

It was amazing to watch you guys.

It really was.

Thank you.

Well, bless you, Glenn.

We'll talk again soon.

So long, sir.

You got it.

Bye-bye.

Cavpack.com.

We all have to consider running,

especially at the local level.

You've got to replace your school board.

You have to.

It has to have just

the strongest people you can possibly imagine who know what critical race theory is, who knows what America really stands for, and do not move.

Run for your school board.

It is very, very easy, believe it or not,

to win.

The best of the Glen Bank program.

So I am trying to eat healthier, and I am.

But the thing is, I don't like healthy food.

I don't like any of it.

You've heard of a fat suit, right?

I mean, there's got to be, when are we getting a skinny suit?

Something that will make me look skinny, because I just want treats all the time.

I grew up in a bakery for the love of Pete.

The bad news is no skinny suit is coming.

You actually have to do the work, blah, blah, blah.

That's why I am eating Built Bars.

It satisfies my sweet tooth, but it's a protein bar, but not like, you know, that's like eating stuff at the bottom of my chalkboard usually.

This is 100% real chocolate.

It's low carb, low sugar.

If I'm eating a protein bar as a treat, come on, you gotta know it's good.

And I am.

Mint brownie, cookies, and cream, the new flavors that are coming out all the time, they're fantastic.

Go to builtbar.com and use the promo code BEC15 for 15% off your order.

Your mouth is going to water just looking at them.

Trust me, builtbar.com, promo code Beck15.

First, just a quick personal note.

I can't thank you enough for all of your support.

There's so many people that are

just had been rooting for me on my

art project, American Heroes, Myths, and Legends.

And as I announced yesterday, it's going to be at Park City Fine Art.

You can go to the website now and find out more about it at parkcityfineart.com.

We announced earlier this morning that we are going to have an official show.

It's so funny because they're like, and we'll have the

artist reception at.

And I'm like, yep, that's what we should do.

An artist reception.

I have no idea what any of this means.

But anyway,

we're going to be doing that July 26th through July 31st in Park City at Park City Fine Art.

It's when they debut the work.

I think it's up right now, but they're going to be taking it down soon.

And I'm going to be there on Saturday, July 31st.

So the last day of July, I will be there in Park City at Park City Fine Art.

The proceeds that I make from the art, I want you to know, go to Mercury One, the American Journey Center for the

Preservation of History, also

OUR, and the Nazarene Fund.

So

all my

profits will be going to Mercury One.

Find it at parkcityfineart.com.

Okay, let me go real quickly now, my friend, or to the former Biden COVID-19 czar.

Oh, I've missed these czars.

Here he is on COVID-19.

How much of this pandemic was preventable and how?

Well, of course, we would have had a pandemic here in the U.S.

no matter what.

But look, we can count

the mistakes, and I think it's important that we do, if for nothing else, so we don't repeat them.

We obviously had a set of technical mistakes with the testing and the PPE that we know about.

But if we're honest, we also had two other types of mistakes that caused a lot of loss of life.

One were just plainly political leadership mistakes.

We denied the virus for too long out of the Trump White House.

There was too much squashing of dissent and playing on divisions.

But I'd also think we all need to look at one another and ask ourselves, what do we need to do better next time?

And in many respects, being able to sacrifice a little bit for one another to get through this and to save more lives is going to be

essential.

And that's something that I think we could all have done a little bit better on.

Right.

We could have sacrificed a little bit more.

You know,

the sacrifice of 40% of all businesses now being closed, I mean, permanently out of business, only 40%.

But I don't know if that sacrifice was good enough.

Or the fact that teen suicide now is up at 31%,

I think a few more of us us could have sacrificed our children.

You know, throw it up on the altar of

Anthony Fauci.

I think we could have done it, right?

Could have done it.

Go to hell.

Who do you think you are telling us that

we should sacrifice more?

Oh, my gosh.

That is

so reminiscent of

Jimmy Carter in those days.

Isn't it?

Oh, yeah, it is.

Blaming everything.

And by the way,

everybody on the left, the media and everything.

You know, Donald Trump was a little slow.

Really?

Was he?

Because when he shut down Europe, when he shut down travel from China, you all bellyached and said, Oh my gosh, what a racist.

And you're on TV saying, Come on down to Chinatown.

Don't start with me.

Some of us have memories.

Now, you know, Lori Lightfoot, who is just

going to say a fox, but

yeah, she's just

delightful.

And

she's, you know, taking some heat

because

she was only meeting with,

you know, minorities reporters.

She didn't want to meet with any white reporters.

Now, yesterday she came out and she said, or the day before yesterday, she came out and said, you know, really, that only lasted two days, so it's really not a problem.

Well, it only lasted two days because everybody on the planet hammered you for it.

Here she is speaking to John Berman, the Chicago Mary Lori Lightfoot.

By the way, Lori Lightfoot, is she Gordon Lightfoot's mom?

Yeah, or grandmother, because Gordon's only 82.

I think she might be his grandmother.

So,

because he's quite a bit of a

connection because I've, yeah, I've always, you know, I've looked at Lightfoot and I think Native American, but I never thought of Gordon Lightfoot.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So does she know about the

ranking of the Edmonds Fitzgerald?

Well, yeah, because it's a legend that lives on from the Chippewa on down, you know, on the big lake they call Gichigumi.

So she knows.

Right.

She knows.

She knows.

Okay.

Here's Gordon Lightfoot's mom, Lori Lightfoot.

I'm the mayor of the third largest city in the country.

I'm an African-American.

Sounds good.

I don't want to state the obvious.

Every day when I look out across my podium, I don't see people who look like me, but more to the point, I don't see people who reflect the richness and diversity.

I'm glad we don't see people like me.

So yes, I started a watching and

conversation about diversity in newsrooms and coverage.

You all are the mirrors on society.

You reflect with a critical and important lens the news of the day.

You hold public officials like me accountable.

Okay, stop.

Just pause it for a second.

Keep that on screen.

May I ask?

No, no.

See if you can keep that on screen.

May I ask,

Pat?

My monitor here at the ranch is very small.

Is he Native American or is he Indian

or Hispanic?

John Berman.

The reporter.

Yeah.

John Berman.

So is he white?

Well, yes.

I think he's...

I think he's white.

Okay, I don't know because I can't see.

He just looks.

He just looks from.

I'm looking at a 2x2 monitor here.

Yeah.

And he looks like

an Indian, and I don't mean American Indian.

And he looks a little constipated as well.

So I think there might be some of that going on, too.

Well,

it's probably his white guilt.

If he's a white guy, that explains that.

It's not constipation.

It's white guilt.

By the way.

For those who have been waiting, waiting for the follow-up to white fragility, I mean,

some people I know didn't read it, and you have to read it because you won't understand the second one.

There is another volume coming out in the series.

It's called Nice Racism,

and it's Robin DiAngelo's new book.

I've been waiting.

Finally, I mean, I think the whole country,

the whole country has been saying, Robin, you can't leave us on that cliffhanger there at the end of white fragility.

What happens to the main characters?

So she has nice racism coming out.

And

this one is written directly to white people

as a white person.

She identifies many common white racial patterns and breaks down how well-intentioned white people unknowingly perpetuate racial harm.

And I think that's great.

I just, I'm glad somebody's finally willing to say it.

She said those patterns include rushing to prove that we're not racist,

downplaying white advantage,

romanticizing black, indigenous, and other peoples of color.

That happens all the time.

I've been romanticizing that all the time.

Me too.

Sometimes I pretend to be all three at the same time.

Black, indigenous, and other peoples of color.

Yeah.

That is so romantic.

Isn't it?

That is so romantic.

Yeah.

Pretending white segregation just happens,

she's on to us.

Yep.

You know, I have to tell you, in my last HOA meeting, which some say I never attend, but oh, I'm there.

Yeah.

We were specifically,

well, we didn't actually use these words, but we're like, how can we keep this neighborhood segregated?

And that's when a lot of the guys who are black that live in my neighborhood were like, excuse me.

And I'm like, oh,

oh, you're probably not black.

You're probably a sellout to your race.

And they were like, oh, yeah, I forgot.

And then

the feeling that we've all had, she explains, the feeling,

just feeling immobilized by shame.

Wow.

And I think that's what is happening to my son.

I really do.

I thought it was just sheer, unadulterated laziness.

But now.

But I think that it...

No, I think he's immobilized by shame.

And what's great is she writes candidly about her own missteps and her own struggles.

You know, and

she does it to encourage white readers to continually face their complicity and embrace courage.

Because you're going to need it in that lifelong commitment of accountability.

And

here are the table of contents.

What is a nice racist?

Second chapter is the one I think I'm buying it for.

Why it's okay to generalize about white people.

Oh, wow.

I think that one is.

Yeah, because they're white, obviously.

That's why it's okay.

It's a short book.

It's a short book.

What is a nice racist?

One that

doesn't beat you over the head and kill you.

I mean, without a smile on their face.

Why is it okay to generalize about white people?

Because they're white.

There is no choir.

Chapter 3.

I don't think you need more than the headline on that one.

What's wrong with niceness?

Well, a lot.

A lot.

Honestly, a lot.

Yeah.

People need to be aware of that.

I mean, niceness doesn't always get you.

You know, you got to be, you got to, sometimes you have to

set a city on fire to get people's attention.

Steal some shoes.

Moves.

The moves of the white progressives.

I wonder if that chapter, that's chapter five in Robin D'Angelo's new book,

Nice Racism.

The moves of white progressives, I wonder if that includes how all of those white progressives that set up BLM, you know, the global network,

how all those white people set that up and then

bilked everybody who gave to BLM.

You know, remember we told you, but of course Robin DiAngelo was saying, hey, BLM, donate to BLM.

And who got rich?

The white liberal progressive.

So.

Well, and Patrice Cullers,

obviously the co-founder of BLM, she made a few bucks on the side, too, which

a few more.

Yes,

she's an

accomplished artist.

Well, and just like

trained Marxist as well.

So, you know, she

all her intents are good.

Yeah, and she knows how to make money as all Marxists do.

Yes.

You steal it from, you steal it from others.

This is the best of the Glenn Beck program, and we really want to thank you for listening.

That's not what one dad did.

His estranged daughter,

when his child support ended, he dropped off his final child support payment, dumping 80,000 pennies on his wife's lawn.

That's not very nice.

That's just not very nice.

Funny, sure.

Hard to do, you bet.

Not as hard probably as picking them up out of the grass

and

then bringing them to the bank to have them count all of them.

But hey, it's legal tender.

It is legal tender.

Actually, you can't do that, can you, Pat?

I didn't think you could.

I thought the banks could say, no, we're not accepting that.

I don't.

I'm not sure about the legality of that.

I don't know how you turn down legal tender, though.

Like you said, it is legal, so why not?

And especially since he paid her, not the bank.

Here's your money.

Although that's vindictive, and I can't explain it.

Yeah, not a good example for his daughter.

Not a good one.

Really?

Here's some good news for you.

CNN's hour-long interview, which clips were played all last week and people were talking about.

It was an interview with President Barack Obama,

and

it was needed at CNN because their ratings are really bad.

And the interview did

nothing for the bad ratings at CNN.

Nobody watched.

Nobody watched.

Half a million people,

probably extra, for the Anderson Cooper 360, watch the show.

By the way,

that was half of what Tucker Carlson had

the same night.

So President Obama not really heeded very much.

And you know why?

Because most people on the left, and this is an honest observation by somebody who used to work for him.

They told me privately that

people were not with him.

The Marxists were not with him because they felt that he had sold out to Hillary Clinton and the Clinton gang, which in some ways he did.

I mean, not from my perspective, because I think he did a lot of damage to the country, but not enough for the Marxists.

And that's why he couldn't draw a crowd, why nobody had any passion, because he had become a guy that was there to play the corporate game and make lots and lots of money, which he did.

Now,

Nickelodeon ratings are out.

Have you seen what Nickelodeon is

doing?

Nick Jr.

has released videos championing things like trans, queer, and pansexual inclusion.

One video that sparked a lot of outrage depicted a cartoon version of a drag queen singing about various LGBTQIA

plus two groups loving each other so proudly on Blue's Clues and You, a show for two to five-year-olds.

And I think that's

those were the clues that I was hoping Blue would find.

I don't know about you, Pat.

Absolutely.

I want,

doesn't everybody want their two to five-year-old in touch with their sexuality sexuality and everybody else's?

Yes.

Yes.

Thank you.

Finally, has

somebody has the guts to say it.

Now, the viewership has dropped from 1.3 million average viewers per week to 372,000.

Wow.

Oh, that's great.

I mean, that is.

That's great.

Oh, isn't it?

Yeah.

Isn't it?

Yeah.

Yeah.

So it looks like Paramount and

Nickelodeon are in some, gosh darn it, financial trouble.

Did you see Jon Stewart

on,

what's his name?

The really obnoxious

funny guy.

Stephen Colbert.

Thank you for knowing that.

Did you see him when he came out?

I mean,

I shouldn't have left it at that.

Oh, he came out.

No, no.

No, I was talking about the, he was talking about the vaccine, right?

Or

actually, where the virus came from.

Is that what you're talking about?

So

this was the return of the Colbert show to the Sullivan Theater because the vaccine is out now.

And

he walks on stage

and he gets a standing ovation.

And then he

grinned widely as he embraced his band leader, John Batiste, which

I have all of his album.

And he said, we'd never really left, but we certainly weren't here.

And it's like the first day back at school.

I'm really happy because

we've all been vaccinated.

I know I'm not going to get COVID.

And a lot of people didn't take good care of themselves during the pandemic.

But

I want you to meet a good friend, Jon Stewart, everybody.

And Jon Stewart walked out and listened to this.

I think we owe a great debt of gratitude to science.

Science has in many ways helped ease

the suffering of this pandemic,

which was more than likely caused by science.

And that's kind of.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

Listen, listen.

It's coffee.

I wouldn't do that to you.

I wouldn't do that to you.

What do you take?

What do you mean by that?

Do you mean like perhaps

there's a chance that this was created in a lab as an investigation?

A chance?

Hold on.

Oh my gosh.

There's evidence I'd love to hear about.

There's a novel respiratory coronavirus overtaking Wuhan, China.

What do we do?

Oh, you know who we could ask?

The Wuhan novel respiratory coronavirus lab.

The disease is the same name as the lab.

That's just a little too weird.

Don't you think?

And then the actual scientists are like, how did this?

So wait a minute.

You work at the Wuhan Respiratory Coronavirus Lab.

How did this happen?

And they're like,

a penguin kissed a turtle.

And you're like, no,

the name of your lab.

I mean, look at the name.

Look at the name.

Can I?

Let me see your business card.

Show me your business card.

Oh, I work at the coronavirus lab in Wuhan.

Oh, because there's a coronavirus loose in Wuhan.

How did that happen?

Maybe a bat flew into the Tauaca of a turkey and then it squeezed into my chili and now we all have coronavirus.

Like, come on.

Okay, wait, okay.

What about this?

What about this?

Listen to this.

Wait a second.

Oh my God.

Oh my God.

There's been an outbreak of chocolatey goodness near Hershey, Pennsylvania.

What do you think happened?

Like, oh, I don't know.

Maybe a steam shovel, maybe with a cocoa bean.

Or it's the

chocolate factory.

Maybe that's it.

That's funnier than John Stewart's been in 30 years.

That was

good.

It's brilliant, and it's the truth.

And notice the audience is all for it, and Colbert is not.

Colbert is like, well,

if there's actual evidence, I'd like to hear it.

No, you know, Stephen, that's the funny thing about being a comedian.

You sometimes play on the obvious to make people laugh.

Now, I know you haven't, well,

you have tried a long time, but you haven't made that happen, I think, ever.

Except when you were with Jon Stewart.

Isn't that weird?

But Jon Stewart is not only making people laugh about it, he's stating the obvious, and the audience is

with him.

It's with him.

It definitely.

Every time Colbert tries to stop him, the audience, he's like, no, no, no.

And the audience cheers.

I think that was amazing.

Now, let me give you Chuck Schumer because he is so woke, so woke.

And I want to give you a clip of what he was talking about when he was doing an interview.

he was wanting to build some extra housing for those in need.

And here's what he said.

And this initiative actually will house the homeless population that is actually living on our streets.

We see them every day.

We're about to house them.

And they're against it.

It's unbelievable.

Yeah, I mean,

I have found that my whole career.

They wanted to build a,

and when I first was assemblyman, they wanted to build a congregate living place for retarded children.

The whole neighborhood was against it.

These are harmless kids.

They just needed some help.

Yeah, the retarded.

They're just

so sweet.

All those

retards.

Thank you very much, Chuck Schumer.

What a ridiculous.

And, you know, they won't say anything about that.

They won't say a word about that.

But I'll bet you that what I just said will be taken out of context.

And they're quite back.

Said the R word.