Sheeple Chase 5 - Coke-Conspirators

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Speaker 8 Hello, and welcome to Sheeplechase, the podcast where I, Georgie Barker, take a deep dive into all things conspiracy.

Speaker 4 And where I, Celia Ripley, stand by with a bullshit detector and 20 cc's of liquid skepticism.

Speaker 8 Now, before we get started with today's episode, I think I should probably address something.

Speaker 7 Ah.

Speaker 8 I know some of you have seen Melanie King's socials, but for those of you who haven't,

Speaker 8 I sent her a DM inviting her to guest on the podcast, and she then posted a screenshot of the message with a caption about how she hates legitimate paranormal investigators like herself being lumped in with vapid grifters with misinformation podcasts.

Speaker 8 Now, I'm not here to rehash anything, but just to let people know, I am taking a break from social media after all the ghost hunters came at me for being a flat earth Illuminati cult leader, which, if they'd actually listened to our episode on the Illuminati, doesn't even make

Speaker 4 At least she cropped your name out of it.

Speaker 8 Yes, but people still figured out who it was from. And when people called her on it, she said she didn't think anyone would figure it out because my audience is so tiny.

Speaker 4 Tiny and dedicated.

Speaker 8 That's right, and thank you to everyone who's defended me online.

Speaker 4 Yeah, sorry again. If I had socials, I would have used them.

Speaker 8 It's fine. I can hardly blame you for not sharing my poison.

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Speaker 8 So, with that out of the way, which conspiracy are we covering today, Celia?

Speaker 4 It's actually your suggestion from last week.

Speaker 8 What's that?

Speaker 4 Last episode, you said I could pick something mundane like New Coke. So guess what I've picked? Oh, right.
It's new coke.

Speaker 4 This is a cautionary tale about arrogant marketing departments. It's 1985 and Coca-Cola has slipped from being the undisputed king of cola to fighting an almost neck-and-neck race with Pepsi.

Speaker 4 New CEO Roberto Goizueta now has one job, beat Pepsi at any cost. And it's time to shake things up.

Speaker 8 Yeah, you really shouldn't do that to Fizzy Drinks.

Speaker 4 Which is why he throws out the 100-year-old recipe that made them an international sensation and replaces it with a new one.

Speaker 8 What a great idea. I assume it was a roaring success.

Speaker 7 Yeah, it went great.

Speaker 4 Everyone loved it. End of episode.

Speaker 8 Really?

Speaker 4 You wish.

Speaker 7 Boo.

Speaker 4 Jokes aside, though, it wasn't as crazy as it first sounds. Baby boomers had historically been huge Coke drinkers.

Speaker 8 Such cokeheads.

Speaker 4 But as they aged, they were switching to low-sugar alternatives, while younger drinkers were all in on Pepsi.

Speaker 8 So, what were baby boomers switching to?

Speaker 4 Diet Coke.

Speaker 8 Wait, wait, wait. So they were still drinking Coke?

Speaker 4 Of course. Coca-Cola was still making money hand over fist, but one of their bragging rights was possibly in danger.

Speaker 8 Gosh, that sounds like a real capitalist crisis. Someone might even lose a bonus over it.

Speaker 7 Right?

Speaker 4 So they had no choice but to release a new, even sweeter recipe. And it worked.
In taste tests, almost everyone preferred the new Coke recipe to Pepsi or old Coke.

Speaker 8 So far, this doesn't sound much like a conspiracy. Hey, is this what it feels like to be you? Nothing suspicious here.
Coincidence. Coincidence.

Speaker 4 But that's what they want you to think. And the new Coke made Ronald Reagan kill a guy.

Speaker 7 Oh wow, really?

Speaker 4 No.

Speaker 8 That was mean.

Speaker 7 I know.

Speaker 4 So, anyway, despite having the winning recipe, the new Coke launch didn't go quite as planned. The first problem was the press conference announcing it.

Speaker 4 Gozueta came out with the confidence of 10 mediocre white men, crowing about the success of a product that wasn't even on sale yet.

Speaker 4 And, even worse, Pepsi had allegedly paid off reporters to ask hostile questions like,

Speaker 4 is this change in admission that people like Pepsi better? And does this move represent the company's break from traditional American values?

Speaker 7 That last one can't be real. Oh yeah.

Speaker 4 Somehow, the idea that New Coke was anti-American was a bafflingly common complaint, and some southerners even framed it as a continuation of the American Civil War.

Speaker 4 What?

Speaker 3 What?

Speaker 4 Why? Because Coca-Cola is based in Atlanta and Pepsi's based in New York. So people from southern states were calling to complain that Coke was surrendering to the Yankees.

Speaker 8 I mean, I almost respect their dedication, but mostly I'm just confused.

Speaker 4 Yeah, it's actually fascinating.

Speaker 4 It turns out, when they did the focus groups, although most people preferred new Coke, about 10% of people hated it, to the point they felt angry at the thought of it replacing old Coke.

Speaker 4 And they were so vocal that they completely skewed the vibe and convinced other participants they didn't like it, even after already saying they did.

Speaker 8 I would have thought the people who liked it would have just peer-pressured the rest into going with it.

Speaker 4 I don't know what to tell you. Apparently, only haters are contagious.

Speaker 8 That shouldn't surprise me.

Speaker 7 Hmm.

Speaker 8 So I'm guessing when the haters escaped quarantine, they infected infected the whole population.

Speaker 4 Possibly. Or that 10% were just so unbelievably loud that they drowned out everyone else.
New Coke did increase sales at first, but then sales started to plummet.

Speaker 4 Coca-Cola received 40,000 complaint letters and their hotline calls shot up to over 1,500

Speaker 7 per day.

Speaker 4 day.

Speaker 4 And these calls weren't just saying, I like Coke better the old way. People were really emotional.

Speaker 4 Coca-Cola even hired a psychiatrist to sit in on some calls, and they said callers were showing textbook signs of grief as if they had lost a family member.

Speaker 8 You can't be serious.

Speaker 4 Oh, just you wait.

Speaker 7 I've got quotes. Oh no.

Speaker 4 Quote. At first, I was numb.
Then I was shocked. Then I started to yell and scream and run up and down.

Speaker 7 Okay.

Speaker 8 Bit of an overreaction, but could be worse.

Speaker 7 Yeah, how about?

Speaker 4 I couldn't have been more surprised if someone told me I was gay.

Speaker 7 What would- What?

Speaker 3 What?

Speaker 8 Actually, you know what, buddy? Me too. I would also be equally surprised to be told I was gay as I would to be told a soft drinks recipe was changing slightly.

Speaker 4 Okay, how about... There are only two things in my life.
God and Coca-Cola. Now you have taken one of those things away from me.

Speaker 7 Okay.

Speaker 8 That one is funny.

Speaker 4 Then you'll love this. When they took old Coke off the market, they violated my freedom of choice.
It's as basic as the Magna Carta, the Declaration of Independence.

Speaker 4 We went to war in Japan over that freedom.

Speaker 8 Okay, we went through funny and back out into scary.

Speaker 4 The backlash was so bad, they brought back original Coke as Coke Classic after only 79 days.

Speaker 8 I mean, that is suspiciously quick.

Speaker 4 And this is where the conspiracies come in. The main one is that Coke put out new Coke knowing it would flop, just to remind people how much they loved old Coke.

Speaker 8 I could believe that.

Speaker 4 Cosueta always denied it, famously saying, we're not that smart and we're not that dumb.

Speaker 8 Nice quote.

Speaker 4 Yeah, and there's no real evidence for it other than how quick they went back to the old formula.

Speaker 8 But did it work? Did people buy more old Coke afterwards?

Speaker 4 Oh yeah. Most market analysts think the big advertising push Coca-Cola did around bringing back classic Coke won them the Cola Wars.

Speaker 7 The Cola Wars?

Speaker 4 Yeah, that's an actual phrase taught in business. And honestly, I'd say people cared about it that much.

Speaker 4 People were buying hundreds of cases of Coke to hoard the old formula, and when it came back, they were so thrilled they kept on buying it.

Speaker 7 Hmm, pretty plausible.

Speaker 8 So, what other conspiracies you got?

Speaker 4 I am so glad you asked, Georgie. How about New Coke was intended to derail complaints from Coca-Cola's bottlers?

Speaker 7 Go on.

Speaker 4 Okay, so technically, the Coca-Cola Company doesn't make drinks.

Speaker 7 Bit harsh.

Speaker 8 They're not good for you, but they are technically potable.

Speaker 4 Fair.

Speaker 4 You see, they actually make syrups. which they then sell to bottling companies who add carbonated water and package up the drinks for venues that use them in soda fountains.

Speaker 8 Hang on, my capitalist bullshit detector is going off.

Speaker 4 Yeah, so it's not a good deal for the bottling companies who have to sign a contract saying they'll only bottle Coca-Cola products in order to get access to the syrups, the recipe, and of course, the branding.

Speaker 8 So a monopoly with extra steps?

Speaker 4 Essentially.

Speaker 4 So in 1985, Coca-Cola was in the middle of a mass dispute with its bottling companies.

Speaker 4 They said that Coca-Cola had always charged more for the old Coke syrup than the others on the basis that it was more valuable for being so established and unchanged.

Speaker 4 Now, with new Coke, they argued that it was too hard to sell after years of marketing Coke's consistency with slogans like, still the same great taste.

Speaker 4 And some said they were even being ostracized by their friends and family because of their association. Yikes.

Speaker 4 So naturally, they said, well, it's changed now, so lower the price, you greedy bricks.

Speaker 8 Oh no, I see where this is going.

Speaker 4 Yeah. By arguing that new Coke syrup was worth less because it had changed, they were seen to accept that old Coke syrup was worth the higher price.

Speaker 8 So people think New Coke was bad on purpose, just to bait the bottlers into tanking their own court case?

Speaker 4 Yeah,

Speaker 4 and there's some weight to the allegations, since after the suit was dropped, Coca-Cola went and bought major stakes in all their biggest bottling companies.

Speaker 8 Of course they did. Well, I think I might need a new conspiracy to wash the taste of classic conspiracy out of my mouth.

Speaker 4 Say no more. How do we feel about claims that Coca-Cola made big, temporary changes to their recipe to hide smaller, permanent changes?

Speaker 8 What, like taking out the cocaine? That would explain a lot of the 80s.

Speaker 4 Close. That was actually in 1903, back before people decided giving piles of cocaine to children might be a bad idea.

Speaker 4 No, this alleged change change was the swap from cane sugar to cheaper high fructous corn syrup, with New Coke being deliberately sickly sweet so that the corn syrup would taste better in comparison.

Speaker 8 But I thought most people preferred New Coke.

Speaker 7 Oh, yeah.

Speaker 4 If Coca-Cola had planned on releasing an unpalatable drink, they absolutely beefed it. And it would have been pointless since high fructous corn syrup had already been phased in for five years.

Speaker 8 Celia, I have a theory.

Speaker 4 I'd expect nothing less.

Speaker 8 Okay, so you said Coca-Cola stopped using cocaine in the early 1900s, right?

Speaker 4 Yes.

Speaker 8 So what if they never took the cocaine out at all? They just said they did, but they were secretly still making good old-fashioned cocaine E.cola all the way up to 1985.

Speaker 4 Sounds expensive.

Speaker 8 Not if it was just an itsy, bitsy, teeny, tiny, child-friendly amount of cocaine.

Speaker 4 Oh, right, well, that's different.

Speaker 8 But then, in the 80s, Reagan's all in on his war on drugs, and it's just too risky to keep it up anymore, so you finally need to change the recipe and take it out, so you cover it up with a bullshit recipe change.

Speaker 4 I hate that this almost makes sense.

Speaker 8 People love the new taste, but for some reason, it just hits different than old Coke, and they can't figure out what's missing. It must be the American values, they think.

Speaker 8 That's why they're craving the old recipe so much. This one's un-American.

Speaker 8 They demand you change back to the old one, so you switch to the original formula, minus the cocaine, and hope it's close enough.

Speaker 8 A few people notice, but luckily, you've already started mixing in garbage sugar syrup so you can pass it off.

Speaker 8 Then, hey, Presto, you're out of the drug game and your share price is up all in less than three months.

Speaker 4 Okay, couple of questions. Shoot, I'm on a roll.
So it's true that Coca-Cola does have a special license to use coca leaves. They do?

Speaker 8 Oh my god, I'm right, I've cracked it.

Speaker 4 But they have a special supplier, Stepan Company, who imports coca leaves from Peru and Bolivia and then decocainizes them.

Speaker 8 Unless they're paid to do a rubbish job.

Speaker 4 Sure, but even then, it doesn't make any financial sense. A can of Coke in 1985 was, what, 25 cents? But I bet cocaine was a smidge more expensive.
It's Coca-Cola.

Speaker 8 I'm sure they'd be getting wholesale prices.

Speaker 4 Even with that, they'd have to be using absolutely minuscule potions.

Speaker 8 But that's what I'm saying. It just needs a little kick.
A baby kick.

Speaker 4 Babies can kick quite hard.

Speaker 8 A puppy kick, then? From a baby dashand? They've only got tiny little legs.

Speaker 7 Hmm.

Speaker 4 I'm not convinced. That's a lot of risk and expense just for a soda.

Speaker 8 But all is fair in love and soda war, Celia.

Speaker 4 I mean, if you could categorically prove they were somehow getting massive amounts of cocaine for cheap.

Speaker 8 In the 80s, not impossible.

Speaker 7 Not completely impossible.

Speaker 8 I'll take it. Vindication!

Speaker 8 Very, very partial conditional vindication.

Speaker 4 Oh, just do your ad and and get on with it.

Speaker 4 Wow, Georgie, I can't believe Mia Hill from Manic Pixie Scream Girls came to your birthday party.

Speaker 8 Oh, Celia, you're so gullible. That was just a look-alike.
I was impressed with you having stepdad who works at Nintendo at your barbecue. That was really hashtag relatable.

Speaker 4 Haha, I don't even have a stepdad. That was a look-alike, too.

Speaker 3 What?

Speaker 8 But, Celia, how can you hire a look-alike for someone who doesn't exist?

Speaker 4 With Everybody Doubles, of course. At Everybody Doubles, you can hire a look-alike for any overly specific but still normal-looking character you can think of.

Speaker 4 Maybe you need to pretend to colleagues you have a girlfriend who's allergic to dogs. Or you need an overly authoritarian personal trainer to get out of running with a friend.

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Whatever and whoever you need can be found at Everybody Doubles.

Speaker 4 Everybody Doubles agents are untrained professionals incapable of performing impressions or basic tasks.

Speaker 8 Well, that's about it for this week. But we'll be back next time with more tales of collusion and cover-ups.

Speaker 4 You doing anything exciting before then? Any more bungee jumping dates?

Speaker 8 I do have another coffee date with the instructor, but I'm not getting my hopes up.

Speaker 4 What's wrong now?

Speaker 8 The tortoise hates me.

Speaker 4 I'm not even going to try to unpack that. Thank

Speaker 4 The manufacturers just hate freedom.

Speaker 8 I might need to cut that for the sponsors.

Speaker 8 Sheeple Chase and the Magnus Protocol are podcasts distributed by Rusty Quill and licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution Non-Commercial Sharealike 4.0 international license.

Speaker 8 Sheeple Chase was created by Sasha Sienna, directed by April Sumner and based on the works of Jonathan Sims and Alexander J. Mule.

Speaker 8 This episode was written by Sasha Sienna and edited with additional materials by Jonathan Sims and Alexander J.

Speaker 8 Mule with audio edits by Nico Vitese, mastering by Meg McKeller and music by Nico Vitese. It featured Sasha Sienna as Georgie Barker and Lori Ann Davies as Celia Ripley.

Speaker 8 To subscribe, explore exclusive extras and enjoy early access, ad-free episodes, visit members.rustyquill.com or join our Patreon.

Speaker 8 Rate and review us online, follow us on social media or email us at mail at rustyquill.com. Thanks for listening.

Speaker 10 Hi, we are here to talk to you about Sucrebay, a perfumery we love so much, they have not one, but two official The Magnus Archives perfumes, one inspired by John and Martin, and another inspired by the mysterious Ex Altiora, a book from the library of Jürgen Leitner.

Speaker 10 Sucrebae also make official perfumes for our friends over at Old Gods of Appalachia, including Blood and Bone and Unknown Roads. You should check them out.

Speaker 10 Sucrebae is a women-owned and operated perfumery that is vegan and cruelty-free, witchy and sometimes irreverent.

Speaker 10 Expect perfumes like You're in a Cult, Call Your Dad, or Vodka and Swearing, the ever-popular Chloroform, or Papa's Waffles.

Speaker 10 Sucrabay do a range of exciting and unique fragrances you won't find anywhere else.

Speaker 10 They broadly fit into the following five categories: classic scents that pass the test of time, goth scents, for those who like it dark and mysterious, witchy scents, that are mysterious and potion-y, nerdy scents, for all the self-professed nerds out there, and femme scents, the classically floral and sweet scents, but we recommend them for anyone of any gender.

Speaker 10 Sucrabay's small batch batch perfumes are not like any other. You can find out more by going to www.rustyquirl.com forward slash perfume.
That's rustyquirl.com forward slash P-E-R-F-U-M-E.

Speaker 10 Also, you can join the supportive and kind Sucra Bay community with over 18,000 members on Facebook at facebook.com forward slash groups forward slash Sucra Bay.

Speaker 8 That's S-U-C-R-E-A-B-E-I-L-L-E.

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