The Moth Podcast: Answers Before Questions

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Speaker 4 Welcome to the Moth. I'm Jennifer Hickson, and on this episode, we give you some answers.

Speaker 4 In a few days, we'll share a moth radio hour all about questions, but we're getting a bit of a head start, focusing on getting answers, messing around and finding out, and what happens when you receive an answer you might not have expected.

Speaker 4 We'll start with a lesson learned. Jason Hymas told this at a Phoenix Story Slam, where the theme of the night was snooping.
Here's Jason, live at the Moth.

Speaker 2 I was about seven or eight years old and

Speaker 2 I grew up in Mexico and as a kid I had three traits that clearly define me. I was a kid that was super curious,

Speaker 2 I was a problem solver and I also had a very healthy appetite. Therefore my nickname was Gordo.
If you're Hispanic, you know.

Speaker 2 So in the night of this incident, my whole family seemed to be preoccupied with adult kind of things that I didn't find as fun.

Speaker 2 So while everyone was doing their thing, I wandered into my parents' bedroom and at my mom's nightstand, I found this like round tab that was just sitting there.

Speaker 2 And honestly, I thought it was candy, right? But I knew it wasn't mine. So I looked over my shoulder, I reached over, broke a little piece of this

Speaker 2 wonder tab, and then I just ate it. Holy crap, was it delicious? It tasted like cherry.
It was sort of fizzy.

Speaker 2 So I went for seconds.

Speaker 2 So while I'm having this moment with this candy, the next thing that I hear is my mom yelling across the house, hey kids, I forgot to tell you I left rat poison on my nightstand.

Speaker 2 What?

Speaker 2 My heart starts pounding. My eyes get teary.
I'm like, I'm going to die. I'm like, oh my God.
So being a problem solver, I ran

Speaker 2 to the other bathroom and I found a gently used bar of soap.

Speaker 2 And you see, in my kid mind, I figured that if soap was strong enough to kill viruses and bacteria, it'll probably kill or neutralize the poison. I was a kid, what would I know?

Speaker 2 So I grabbed this bar of soap and I went ahead and put it in my mouth and proceeded to scrape it with my teeth, followed by trying to keep it down with water and I continued doing that for a while until unfortunately I got to a horrible horrible realization I was too late and the poison finally was taking over my body of course it couldn't be the quarter of a bar of soap that I just ate and the fizzy tap that I ate before that of course not it was the poison right that was finally like killing me so I guess I could have gone to my mom and be like mom mom I ate the poison please take me to the hospital but I didn't right?

Speaker 2 I was just like, I did this. It is what it is.
And,

Speaker 2 you know, I had many things running through my head, right? But one of those things is I didn't want my parents to just find me dead. So I figure I'm like, I'm just going to get to a hiding

Speaker 2 spot and just die there.

Speaker 2 So in a sleeping beauty kind of fashion, I just got there and I was just there contemplating my last minutes, right? And just waiting for my imminent death. Was it going to take long? I was long?

Speaker 2 Was it going to be like hours?

Speaker 2 Were the springs from underneath the couch, the last thing that I was going to see in this world?

Speaker 2 You see, I've never died before. So this was all for, you know, a new experience for me.

Speaker 2 At some point, my mother finished cooking dinner and again, I didn't miss a meal. So it was kind of strange

Speaker 2 that I wasn't at the dinner table

Speaker 2 so my mother started calling me and she was like Gordo Gordo come down for dinner and I wasn't having you see figured that if I was going to die there was absolutely no point for me to eat right why would I why would I waste food it was fine so

Speaker 2 She kept on calling me and then eventually she realized that I was probably in distress.

Speaker 2 So she started coming up the stairs and then she was like, Gordo, Gordo, come down to, from, you know, come down for dinner. And from underneath the couch, I'm like, why?

Speaker 2 And she was like, what do you mean, why? I'm like, I'm going to die.

Speaker 2 To my surprise, she started laughing.

Speaker 2 And she goes, oh, my child, you're not going to die. You ate an effervescent tap.
I was just trying to teach you a lesson.

Speaker 2 I was equal parts horrified and relieved. I was relieved that I wasn't dying after all, but I was horrified that the people that loved me the most, right, made me just think that I was dying.

Speaker 2 Needless to say,

Speaker 2 to this day, I don't snoop, I don't take a pill that I don't know where it came from,

Speaker 2 and I will never, ever, ever use Irish Spring bar soap.

Speaker 2 Thank you.

Speaker 4 That was Jason Hymas. Jason is a Phoenix-based storyteller and risk analyst at Mayo Clinic.
Born in Mexico, he immigrated to the U.S. at 14.

Speaker 4 When not hiking Arizona trails, he's cooking for loved ones and collecting stories.

Speaker 4 If you want to get some answers to storytelling questions, well, fall is here and the Moths Education Program is offering free workshops for high school and college students to learn the art and craft of true personal storytelling.

Speaker 4 In the workshops, students will learn to use moth storytelling techniques to build personal narratives, which can be used in telling stories with friends, family, at the dinner table, as a starting point for those college essays or in interviews.

Speaker 4 My daughter recently took part in a moth high school workshop and had an absolute blast.

Speaker 4 She met kids from a dozen different schools, shared stories, learned skills, and crafted a story about a hissing cockroach. Apply on our website at themoth.org/slash edu.

Speaker 4 After the break, an answer to an entirely different question. Be back in a moment.

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Speaker 4 Welcome back. Andrea Roski-Metcalf told our next story at a Twin Cities Grand Slam, where the theme of the night was making waves.
Here's Andrea, live at the moth.

Speaker 7 When religious leaders begin in a new congregation, there's a honeymoon period.

Speaker 7 A few months, a year if you're lucky.

Speaker 7 I'm a Lutheran pastor. I started with a new congregation in March.

Speaker 7 My honeymoon lasted two days.

Speaker 7 On the third day, I realized I had walked right into a full-blown church scandal

Speaker 7 and the person at the center of that scandal

Speaker 7 was me.

Speaker 7 I wanted that church so bad. They were scrappy and forward-thinking, and it seemed like such a good match.

Speaker 7 I started two weeks before Easter.

Speaker 7 I got right to work, planning services for Holy Week. I was looking to settle in.
I was looking to stay a while.

Speaker 7 And by day three, I wondered if I would make it to Easter.

Speaker 7 Some members of my congregation had found a photograph on the internet.

Speaker 7 It was me

Speaker 7 in front of the Hennepin County Courthouse on the day when the Supreme Court overturned Roe v. Wade.

Speaker 7 I was wearing a clergy collar and holding a sign that said, Even the Virgin Mary got to choose.

Speaker 7 You motherfuckers.

Speaker 7 I should point out

Speaker 7 that the relationship between a pastor and her people is based on trust and mutual understanding

Speaker 7 and you build it over time.

Speaker 7 I had been there for three days and this photo had been circulating for weeks.

Speaker 7 It wasn't even the photo that was the problem. I was happy to sit down and talk about the photo.
It's that I didn't know who to talk to.

Speaker 7 No one was talking to me.

Speaker 7 They were just talking about me.

Speaker 7 It was all rumors and rumblings.

Speaker 7 It went on like this for more than a week.

Speaker 7 Some people left the church.

Speaker 7 I wondered if I would have to leave two.

Speaker 7 A few days before Easter, finally, someone came to me.

Speaker 1 Why did you go to that rally?

Speaker 7 She asked. So I explained, the only time I have experienced suicidal ideation was during my own two pregnancies.

Speaker 7 I got through them one day at a time because I got to choose one more day. No one else did.

Speaker 7 Yeah, but why did you need a sign?

Speaker 7 Well, if you go to a protest wearing a clergy collar, you better have a sign or the people will think you think that other thing.

Speaker 2 Yeah, but that word.

Speaker 7 Do your children use that word?

Speaker 7 You guys, I don't even use that word.

Speaker 7 Except for Supreme Court justices who put their hand on the Bible and lie to the American people because that shit pisses me off

Speaker 7 I didn't I didn't say that to her no no my children don't use that word and

Speaker 7 and then we sat down and we talked

Speaker 7 We really talked and we built up a little bit of trust and understanding and that was good, but she was just one person.

Speaker 7 The rumors,

Speaker 7 they were still there. It felt like half the congregation had this picture on their phones.

Speaker 7 Easter Sunday came, the sanctuary was packed.

Speaker 7 I preached a sermon full of questions because I didn't have

Speaker 7 any answers. I handed out bread at communion.
It felt like the only thing I could give my people and it wasn't even mine to give.

Speaker 7 The body of Christ, given for you.

Speaker 7 The week after Easter was

Speaker 7 so quiet. It freaked me out.
I could see the writing on the wall. I started drafting a letter of resignation.
But then another woman came to see me. I want you to send me that picture, she said.

Speaker 7 I was like, I don't think that's going to help anything.

Speaker 7 I want to send it to my daughter, she said.

Speaker 2 Oh?

Speaker 7 My daughter doesn't come to church anymore, but I told her about you and I told her about your sign, and she's going to come to church now.

Speaker 2 Oh.

Speaker 7 And then she and I sat and we talked and we built a little trust and a little understanding. And I wish that I could tell you that there's a really clear end to this story.

Speaker 7 But that scrappy congregation and I, we're still writing it.

Speaker 7 Some people, some more people,

Speaker 7 they left.

Speaker 7 Some new people came. My gay atheist neighbor recommends this church on Reddit because of that sign.

Speaker 7 They're still really forward thinking.

Speaker 1 I still think it's a really good match.

Speaker 2 I am

Speaker 7 settling in.

Speaker 7 I am planning to stay

Speaker 2 for a while.

Speaker 7 And if you want to see that picture, don't bother on the internet. Just come to worship any Sunday at 10 a.m.
and ask around.

Speaker 7 I'm pretty sure half the congregation still has it

Speaker 7 on their phones.

Speaker 4 That was Andrea Roski-Metcalf. Andrea is a Lutheran pastor.

Speaker 4 Since Palm Sunday of 2023, she's served alongside the people of Diamond Lake Lutheran Church, a congregation of justice and joy in South Minneapolis.

Speaker 4 She has one husband, two daughters, and an overwhelming number of plants. We asked Andrea how she had settled into her role as pastor.
She said that she and her congregation are still such a good fit.

Speaker 4 Quote, We're creative and courageous together and we have fun together and our community is growing. I feel really lucky to be serving here, even if the initial landing was a little rough.

Speaker 4 If you'd like to see some photos of Andrea and her church, you can go to themoth.org slash extras. Unfortunately, we don't have that photo.

Speaker 4 Andrea told us that she wanted to exercise a little bit of discretion. That brings us to the end of our episode.
Thanks so much for joining us.

Speaker 4 From all of us here at the Moth, we hope that, whatever question you ask and whatever answer you get, you have a wonderful week

Speaker 2 jennifer hickson is a senior director one of the hosts of the peabody award-winning moth radio hour and a co-author of the moth's how to tell a story andrea roski metcalf story was coached by michelle jalowski this episode of the moth podcast was produced by sarah austin janes sarah jane johnson and me mark zollinger The rest of the moths leadership team includes Sarah Haberman, Christina Norman, Marina Cluche, Jennifer Hickson, Jordan Cardenale, Kate Tellers, Suzanne Rust, and Patricia Ureña.

Speaker 2 The Moth podcast is presented by Odyssey. Special thanks to their executive producer, Leah Rhys-Dennis.
All moth stories are true, as remembered by their storytellers.

Speaker 2 For more about our podcast, information on pitching your own story, and everything else, go to our website, themoth.org.

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