929 - Given feat. Alex Nichols (4/28/25)

All I wanna be is a jumble.

All I wanna be is a jumble.

We ain't gotta tell this.

All I wanna

Hello everybody, it's Choppo coming at you this Monday, April 28th.

It's me and Felix and joining us once again is the great Alex Nichols.

Alex, welcome back.

What's up, bitches?

Having a good time?

Having a good time.

I'd like to kick off this episode with some big fighter jet news.

We've got fighter jet news.

And this is just some more fun in the Red Sea.

And Felix, I'd like to run this by you.

This literally just hit the news wire right before I came on, but it says here:

USS Harry S.

Truman lost an FA-18E Super Hornet assigned to the Strike Fighter Squadron and a tow tractor as the aircraft carrier operated in the Red Sea April 28th.

All personnel are accounted for, with one sailor sustaining a minor injury.

The F-A-18E was actively under tow in the hangar bay when the move crew lost control of the aircraft.

The aircraft and tow tractor were lost overboard.

Sailors towing the aircraft took immediate action to move clear of the aircraft before it fell overboard.

An investigation is underway.

Oh, that's good.

That's good that they took immediate action and didn't just stand there and go, oh no, and like get crushed by the aircraft.

Small victories for the

ship.

You're right, they should.

It's dishonorable.

I mean, like, what?

I mean, think about what the salary that those sailors are making versus what that F-A-18 Super Hornet costs.

I think they should have to justify the loss of that material with their lives.

I always feel bad for like those guys in the Navy because, you know, I play a lot of DCS where like the F-A-18 is like the most fun module.

And at this point,

I would never take part in this mission, you know, but

if it was a different country, if it was, if it was,

we weren't fighting on Sarah Law, they weren't there.

If we were fighting Greece, you know,

same place, same armaments, I would do a way better job than these guys because of what I've done in DCS.

But whenever you load up your plane on like the launch bar and everything and on the carrier, and you look at those like hunchbacks that are helping you like load up your plane, I always, and same as when I see them in real life or read these stories where it's like, you know.

the ninth guy fell off the boat again, the one thing you're not supposed to do in the Navy.

It's like, that's someone who saw Top Gun in theaters and thought they were going to be a pilot, and they made them be a fucking plane Torco.

It's so sad.

Felix, I've had the exact same thought multiple times, like even watching Top Gun, like in the opening credits or whatever, where you see the F-18s taking off from the aircraft carrier.

And then there's the guy that just sort of gives them the salute or just points down the runway before the afterburners kick in and the catapult shoots it off the dock or shoots it off the

surface.

What do you call it?

The fuck?

What's the

keto bar?

No, no, like what's the, you know, like the top of a boat, the floor of a boat.

The deck.

The deck.

The deck.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry to all our fans of maritime terminology.

Boat terms always confuse me.

Well, that's why it rolled off the side when they turned.

If it was like a concave thing, if it was like a classic boat where there's like a hole in the middle.

You're right.

It would be harder to take off, but it at least wouldn't just roll off the side when you turn.

Could you imagine those asexual, aromantic gay guys, Gilbert and Sullivan, fucking up like this?

They would never do it.

They would die.

Yeah.

They would get the lash.

A British tar is a soaring soul.

It fell apart when they got rid of the lash and rum race.

But then just the rum and soda now.

Yeah.

But no, you mentioned, yeah, if the if aircraft carriers had sort of a concave deck rather than one that you could fly planes off of, this wouldn't have happened.

Like a half bike.

You can catch air off a half bike.

Don't tell me you can't.

Well, no, I mean, that's kind of what a ski jump is.

Yeah, even skiers can do it.

This expensive plane can't take off at an angle.

But there is an update to the story where it says here, a U.S.

official said that initial reports from the scene indicated that the Truman made a hard turn to evade Houthi fire, which contributed to the jet falling overboard.

Now,

that could be the case.

They could have been like swerving to avoid a missile, or Pete Hegseth was at the captain's wheel and, you know, had a few, knocked a few back before, you know.

That was part of being in the Navy.

Yeah.

Like, okay, a hard turn to avoid a missile, which

I mean, okay, you know how fast like an aircraft carrier goes?

Like

two miles an hour?

Yeah.

At full steam.

Like, how, like, was that a missile?

Are you sure?

If you could dodge it by turning an aircraft carrier, I don't know.

I just like back to the plane Torgos because I feel like they're not unsung heroes, but

they tragic.

Yeah.

Do you ever think, like, you know how cool it looks when the pilot's taking off and they do that hand signal bolt?

Yes, that's what I'm talking about.

Yeah.

Do you ever think that like when they take off or when they get back and everyone's like, yeah you know yeah you you did it you you know you launched that cruise with some of that sandbar or when they succeed like when they were you know fighting isis getting um so many sloppy seconds uh

that do you think that like the plane tourgos are like T, like the pilot who everyone loves, he said that I'm like, I'm the best at like putting his helmet on.

You know what I mean?

Because he's like, it's so individualized it's like one guy flips down the guy's visor one guy like pops a fin on one of the bombs is it like bat boys or caddies where you just get really into that culture or are you just like he's you know if he if the pilot died he said i'm so good at like zipping up his outfit that i could fly it one day see like to me it's like you know like i've had exactly the same thought felix like the guy on the deck of the aircraft carrier who does the cool hand motion and like points down the deck.

Then the afterburners kick in.

The catapult shoots the F-18 off of the deck.

And I'm just thinking, like, you're watching that happen.

You're just thinking, man, I'd be so much funner to be in the cockpit right now.

It's hot as fuck on this deck.

Then it's just like you have to wave goodbye.

And I just think, like, does anyone just give them the finger after they get off the boat?

Like, fuck you.

Because, like, if you were the squire to a knight, like, there's a, isn't there a possibility that you could one day have your own horse or something?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

That's like the number one way to become a knight is squire.

And the least guaranteed way to become a pilot is to become the asshole on the deck who's they don't even wear military outfits.

Yeah, no, they have like they have like the vest that joggers wear when after dark

They're the good they're wearing like half of the teletubby costume

They could not be farther away from being pilots.

They're the one branch of the military where you're

in an active duty, you have to be as like as visible as possible.

Like you have a propeller beanie flashing lights on your head.

It's like, you know, like,

you ever seen those light up like vests that they give dogs when they're outside after dark?

My mom has a collar she puts around her dog that's like, like blinks like a Christmas light when she lets it out at night.

I think like I am closer to being a pilot than those guys.

Well, I don't know.

They just have to get in the plane.

They just have to let the intrusive thoughts win and get in the plane.

Because once you're in the air, they can't stop you.

They're not going to shoot down their own plane.

Yeah.

They might not be able to do that.

That's the thing valets struggle with.

Like, I could just drive out of here and never come back.

Oh, oh, I'm behind the wheel of Alexis.

I have the keys.

Do you think there's a guy in the Navy where his job is to edit that scene out of Ferris Bueller?

Because he's like, no,

we can't let them see it.

Too much tomfoolery in that.

Well, so yeah, just an update on how things in the Red Sea are going.

Like Trump said last week, ask the Houthis how it's going.

Well,

we should be asking the USS Harry Truman how it's going.

They're having to do like a U-turn.

Have you done the classic K-turn maneuver

and are shedding F-18 Super Hornets left and right?

They're shedding them like ticks off the side of the boat.

On Sura Allah has shot down like 30 fucking Predator drones at this point.

It really, I don't know, it could be going better for the Navy.

I'm not a hater of, you know, I'm, I hope everyone wins, but uh, like, God, we're, we're sucking.

But, like, you know, I still maintain that if I had to join any branch of the armed service, it would be the Navy, right?

I mean, you know,

family history there, you know, and I'm gay.

Okay.

Yeah.

Um, but like, you know, it's, it's probably not so bad.

Like, you know, those aircraft carriers, they're like office buildings, you know, got vending machines and stuff on them.

Probably got TV.

Got a lot of nice shit on there.

He looks by the way.

Have you ever been to the USS Intrepid?

No, no.

We should go.

We should go.

It's nice out now.

We should, we should make a trip there.

I think you'd love it.

We should, yeah, we should go.

Did you know, like, well, like, all the, all the aircraft carriers we have now are nuclear powered.

And those are like, it was real, like, diesel was like the shittiest thing for the Navy because that's like, that's when you were sleeping in like a morgue slot.

And it still kind of sucks if you're not fully human, you're enlisted.

But I've seen like, I've seen a bunch of videos.

The officer quarters are like kind of nice.

It's kind of like it's

you wouldn't like, except for the captain's area, that's like legitimately like a nice house that's at sea and being propelled by a nuclear reactor.

But

it's like for something that's on a boat, it's pretty good.

Yeah.

Nuclear submarine, like nuclear submarines are still like, if you're in a nuclear submarine that carries nukes, you still want to kill yourself all the time.

But if it's a nuclear submarine that just like floats around, you're fine.

It's like, there's a lot of room.

Wait, what nuclear...

Okay, oh, so you mean like an aircraft carrier is nuclear-powered and floats around?

I thought you were going to be like, the nuclear submarines that just float around.

No, they have those.

No, wait, no, wait.

No, no, that is what I mean.

Why aren't they faster?

Wait, which do you mean, Alex?

The nuclear submarines or the nuclear aircraft carriers both of them well because shouldn't it be like a million miles an hour the nuclear submarines nuclear submarines are like decently fast aircraft carriers are like

what could make that fast like look at it it's like the least aerodynamic thing

more propellers yeah make it pointy how about sails yeah sails

what's the downside of having sails you've got all those sailors just walking around doing nothing looking at their phone you might as well be climbing up the rigging in the storm

falling off.

You know how Howard Hughes tried to make the world's biggest plane and like he constructed it out of like balsa wood?

Yeah.

It was kind of like a wood frame to keep the weight down so it could take off.

We should have like a, we should bring back wood.

We should bring back wood.

I know I know Trump wants to bring back shipbuilding, but we should bring, we should build the world's biggest wood aircraft carrier.

And it could like have they could like, instead of like planes, it could have gliders and things like that.

I wish there was an insane billionaire who made uh vehicles that explode i wish there was someone like that around someone who puts billions of dollars into vehicles that explode and don't work yeah it's so crazy like howard hughes was like he was so afraid of like germs and everything

and no kids like had like two girlfriends in his life but he's probably had like classic vaginal style sex more times than elon musk probably more times than a lot of us to be honest i mean he was

famous going through him in Hollywood movies.

Yeah.

Yeah, I know.

Yeah.

It just, I don't know.

I'm still upset by that malling cum thing, which does seem like a thing Howard Hughes would do.

Maybe towards the end of his life.

I don't know about that.

I don't know about when he was with Ava Gardner or Catherine Hepburn.

I'd want to see The Aviator by Martin Scorsese.

I used to think there was a laugh track in that movie until I realized that I just watched a really good cam when I was 24.

Why were people laughing?

Coming with the milk?

Yeah.

Because Artie was a funny guy.

I guess that.

It was like, man, people were really mean in the 40s.

They were just laughing at this guy's problems.

Yeah, people didn't know what mental illness was back then.

They just thought he was, you know,

he was a guy who really cared about things being clean and

thought black people caused cancer.

I guess that gives you a lot of power as an audience member.

You can like change the popular memory of a movie.

If there's a guy filming it for the internet, he's going to put it on a torrent website and you just laugh through the whole thing.

You just start reacting or like clapping during it.

Like you're like baked in there.

Oh my God.

Yeah.

It's like a real Mandela effect.

Yeah, wasn't there a laugh track?

I could have sworn there was a laugh track here.

Well, you know, I mean, I think movies should consider adding laugh tracks, like, because most people who watch movies, even in theaters now, are just looking at their phone.

and, like, they need that subtitles on, and they need the laugh track to sort of like be goosed into like being told what the reaction you're supposed to be having is.

Yeah, or at least have the sign that lights up.

Applause.

I don't know.

Theater profits are going down.

You got to try anything.

Yeah.

Any idea.

You're not extending enough on your follow-through.

Follow-through is everything in golf, just like live.

Don't you mind?

Okay, moving on from naval terminology and the Red Sea.

I'd like to make there is one thing of note here today.

That is that

chair of the House Oversight, Minority Chair of the House Oversight Committee, Representative Jerry Conley Connolly, is stepping away

because

the cancer that he was diagnosed with six months ago when he got the job has

come back.

It has returned.

So he's stepping away from his duties as the House Oversight Chair for the Democratic Party.

And you'll remember that

this was the plum assignment that AOC was campaigning for.

So,

well, boys, what do we think?

Is AOC getting the oversight chair now that Jerry Connolly is, you know,

the inevitable seems to be taking its course?

Well, I mean, let's not act like anyone could have predicted this.

I actually hear he's healthy.

I mean, we all...

We all got scared earlier this year when there were those pictures of Jerry Connolly leaving Camilla Cabello's house, and he looked really, he looked like he was using again.

But he's been like good since then.

And a lot of people actually think this is the family, and they're trying to like, they're trying to like pressure him into retiring so he'll do residences and they can

and they can you know steal from him again.

So it's really sad story.

They said he had Havana syndrome because he was all fucked up over Camilla Cabello.

That's what they said.

Jerry Connolly's 160-year-old father needs to let him out of that conservatorship right now.

I hate how they like shade him whenever he posts skin on his private IG.

Yeah, like you made the decision to follow that.

You had to request it.

So you're kind of weird.

The thing about it, like, why step down?

Like, what is the difference?

Yeah, right?

Yeah, there was that woman who was in a nursing home in Texas when she was still in Congress.

She was just like in the dementia ward of a nursing home and her staff didn't tell anybody.

And she just didn't show up to votes for like a year.

And then someone eventually spilled the beans and said, yeah, she doesn't know her own name.

She's in a nursing home.

We just brought her over there and didn't tell anybody.

I don't know.

Like, you can just do whatever.

It doesn't matter.

Like, so the rationale.

for Jerry Connolly is like, well, yeah, now he has to step down because he's dying.

What was he doing before?

Like, Like, it's, I don't, yeah, I don't get that this is, I think my,

this is like a mean joke my dad told.

There was like a guy who he knew who like retired from his job when he was like 80.

And my dad was like, who, you know,

just die.

Not like you have time to waste.

Yeah, just die at work.

Yeah, who cares?

Well, I mean,

when they gave him this, the, the, this, the, the chair of the oversight committee and like, you know, people, people thought it was going to be AOC because she had been such a you know loyal soldier and that you know she has some you know energy and excitement and you know the the youthful vigor of someone who's not 80 years old and dying of cancer uh but like the argument was that like it's jerry's turn he's he's waited his whole career he's waited his whole life and now he has cancer yeah he's gonna be dead in a couple months but like it's basically congressional democrats run their caucus like a make-a-wish program i mean like honestly i never heard like an affirmative defense of it like the the the, it's his turn thing.

That's something that, like, me, me and Josh talked about because it's the only reason that you could think of for this, you know, because just Democrats love that rationale for everything.

That it's like, I, yeah, you know, the, the seniority rule that, like, being a Democrat is just like, it is like being an archon.

It is this service you do to the world.

And the longer you do it, the more entitled you are.

Because I, I mean, like, I, I don't know.

You tell me.

did you ever see like any libs like affirmatively be like, no, this is why it's good for the job?

Because the only thing that I ever got

was people being like, it's mean to say he's a ghost of a guy who killed himself.

Yeah, I mean, I mean, I saw, I saw not, not so much like affirmative defenses of him in that position, but I saw people being like, it's rude to jump in line, and that's what AOC would be doing.

Yeah, yeah.

I guess it's that, yeah, it's.

She's like, sorry, of, but would it be upjumped?

You know, it's, it's, it's, it's improper or it's, it's, it's a violation of like, you know, like the expectations of a guy who's like served dutifully for 90 years.

Him and Robert Byrd came up together.

They were, they were next up out of the country.

And if we don't give people those rewards, people aren't going to be motivated to stay in Congress for 60 years.

And that's something we really want.

We want people staying in Congress until they're in their 80s.

Think about how loyal Jerry Connolly is.

Like, when he got in there, it was like birth of the nation, Woodrow Wilson.

They were having a lot of fun.

And by the time he was like 130, they were like, you have to wear this Kente cloth.

And he was like, okay, I'm a Democrat.

It meant one thing in

1912.

One thing now.

I guess I bring this up slightly selfishly because

a clip of an interview I did from like several months ago was resurfaced by the account Post-Left Watch.

We need to differentiate the fucking the political program from whatever AOC is doing with this like bodies.

You know, recently like what she just lost her like oversight committee bid to head up that committee to a guy who's like 75 and has cancer.

And I just see that and I think, good.

Buy the ticket, take the ride.

Because like, I mean, this, this is what you wanted.

This is what you wanted.

So like, I mean, and yeah, it was her on stage of the DNC saying they're working tirelessly for a ceasefire.

That to me was like that.

When I shared my thoughts, and I thought it was good that AOC didn't got passed over for that because, you know, I mean, I think it's instructive as to like.

Like, who do you think you're bargaining with?

Like, you'll get nothing like it.

I'm sorry.

Yeah, why did you defend Biden?

Yeah.

What was the point of that?

Well, I mean, he's not even there anymore to give you anything.

God, that was so weird.

Do you remember that week when it was like clear that everyone in the party was like, yeah, he threw up on me?

You know, like, I saw him die today.

And AOC and Bernie were like, he's the most liberal guy ever.

What the fuck was that?

Yeah, like they were so afraid of him.

And then a week later, he steps down.

I know what the calculation was.

It was like, oh, if they say Biden has to go, he'll be obstinate.

And then the Democrats will blame them.

Yeah, that's never fucking happened.

Well, I mean,

in the clip that was shared, I said this in the context of her

co-signing a particularly murderous lie that the Biden-Harris administration was, quote, working tirelessly for a ceasefire in Gaza, which, you know, like, I don't know if you guys saw this, but Dropsight, our friends at Drop Sight summarized a

big investigation, a big investigative piece by the Israeli news channel 13, which contains this quote from former Israeli ambassador Michael Herzog.

God did the state of Israel a favor that Biden was the president during this period.

We fought in Gaza for over a year and the administration never came to us and said, ceasefire now.

It never did.

And that's not to be taken for granted.

So, I mean, look, like,

this won't be news to anyone who listens to this show.

But, like, in the context of AOC, you know, putting her credibility and that of her supporters behind that on stage at the DNC, like, I think it...

One should ask the question, if you think that she's only doing the best job she can within a rigged political system, what she got, and by extension, you and her constituents got in return for supporting Biden and that particularly murderous evil lie about working tirelessly for a ceasefire.

When every, I mean, like, it should be well beyond any shadow of a doubt that they were doing no such thing.

Yeah.

And it's like that, there's no fucking defense for that.

Because if she actually believed that, it is like, okay, then either they tell you nothing, which means like, what were you going to get out of this if you fucking sold out this comprehensively and she won, or like you knew that this was complete bullshit that you you you said this because you knew of the the like liability that the biden and harris israel strategy was with younger voters and you thought this would be a fig leaf to them either is just like okay you have no business doing this and you know like i i you know and people were you know of course perpetually mad at me for this and that that's fine but like i i guess like i i'd like to say like for the context of what i said like if it seems like i'm being too hard on aoc it's because she's closer to my political point of view she's someone in power who is closer to my political point of view than let's say chuck schumer is so it's like it's because of that that i find it so especially galling that she would you lend whatever credibility she has to like this like i said a murderous and evil lie or is just simply too stupid to have the job.

So it's like yeah i i do hold her to a higher standard than i do chuck schumer or john fetterman and it's because like like it's like if anything like i'm not sing i'm i'm not singling her out because like i hate her because for some i i don't know some vague opaque reason like i'm singling her out because she singled herself out as like you know the most prominent young voice in politics in this country that you know, like I said, like on balance, like go down the list of the things she supports or the cause, you know, things she stands for is closer to what I believe in than any other Democrat.

But it's like because of that that I'm going to demand that she have to, that she explain herself

on this issue before any

future support going forward.

Also, I mean,

to that end, what is this strategy of like every few years we're going to go out there and say there needs to be a new type of Democratic Party where we care about, we care about working issues.

And then one way or another, they get screwed, they lose, whatever.

They're not able to actually exert any influence on the Democratic Party because they will not meaningfully challenge it.

Seemingly, you know,

then we'll get four years of like whatever shitty Democrat.

And we'll just do this over and over and over again.

At what point does that do?

Can you look at that and go, okay, this is worth it?

I mean, the counter argument, right, is always left-wing people are fucking allergic to power.

Would you call this power?

Would you call this anything?

Yeah, no, and like the follow-up to that is power to do what?

Like, I mean, if AOC has power, but uses that power to say, to lie about what the Biden administration is doing to Gaza, then like, I don't think that's power.

I think that's power that should be critiqued rather than celebrated or simply like look the other way.

Yeah, the only way you can accomplish things is by mimicking what the establishment is doing and doing it with their permission.

What's the point then?

Yeah.

That's the thing is, like, I don't, I've said that

the last time we talked about this, like, I think Bernie has like said the more disgraceful fucking things, like, on a moral level between the two in the past, like, five years, especially on Israel.

But

I think that the read of AOC, that she is like a cynical operator, I actually fucking wish that was true.

Because if she was totally cynical and like completely just out for herself, she would at some point realize that there is more to be gained just on an objective level between like, I don't know, this is between playing Russian roulette with like two bullets in the gun versus playing Russian roulette with a semi-auto.

She would get more out of actually challenging the Democratic Party as an oppositional figure to it than doing this shit just forever, I guess.

Which is, you know, like, which is, which is to like take her credibility among a youthful progressive constituency and using it to just be like get on board you know everyone get on board by biden's our guy and or you know kamala is great and they're working tirelessly to end the war in gaza

uh like i mean like yeah like that's that's that's having power i suppose Did you speak of Biden, did you guys see that clip of Elizabeth Warren talking about him the other week?

Yeah.

Oh, yeah.

Well, that was amazing.

I couldn't help from laughing.

Yeah.

Yeah,

I didn't notice anything.

I didn't notice.

Oh, he didn't shit his pants in front of me.

Do you regret saying that President Biden had a mental acuity?

He had a sharpness to him.

You said that up until July of last year.

I said what I believe to be true.

And you think he was as sharp as you?

I said I had not seen Decline.

What was that show, by the way?

Yeah, I have no idea.

Yeah, no, it was some guy with like 51 subscribers on YouTube.

Which if you can trick a senator into coming on that, good for you.

That's a pretty, that's a good get.

You guys haven't had her on the show.

That's true.

I think you can do that with olds.

You can be like, hey, I'm on AOL.

Yeah, I'm one of Gen Z's top influencers.

Yeah.

Well, I think the Democrats now, since losing the election, clearly have this kind of mandate to sort of communicate to the dum-dum demographic by going on podcasts.

And I don't know who Elizabeth Warren was talking to, but like,

she was just like, like, Look, he was standing.

Okay, I saw him standing.

And then, and then, as you said, Alex, like, the guy's just like, come on, what are you talking about?

And then she just basically kind of cracked, like, she tries to bottle her own laughter.

She can't hear me.

Like, well, that's a good point.

You know, I suppose standing is not exactly an indication of mental fitness.

But

it's amazing.

They made people do that.

Yeah.

They just made everyone do weekend at Bernie's with a clearly demented guy.

They all had to do it for what?

Like, what was the point of that?

Like, what the fuck?

It's insane.

And, you know, like, it's funny, though, because these are the same people that say over and over again that Trump and MAGA are a personality cult of blind dedication to dear leader.

But, like, I mean, come on.

Like,

they have elements of that in their own coalition.

The point of Biden was that he's just like

a soulless representative of the Democratic Party establishment.

He's just the party.

He's like the 20th century Democratic Party, but then we have to worship him.

Like, why?

Who cares about him then?

He's just a placeholder.

He's just a Democrat.

He's like a Democrat your parents voted for.

That's all he means.

Why does it have to be him?

It is, yeah, out of anyone to make a personality cult about, it is like,

it's like dying to protect like the staples in your suburb.

Yeah.

Felix, speaking of outreach to the dumb-dumb demographic, did you see that Pete Budiges went on the podcast of your favorite comedian, Andrew Schultz?

Yo, fam.

Yo, is you, man?

Shit, I've been in a 5% nation.

Is he okay?

That's Andrew Schultz talking to him.

Well, I didn't

talk to you.

I didn't see any of,

I didn't see any of Pete's interpreter on it, but I did appreciate Andrew Schultz's comments on why he voted for Donald Trump, which was like, yo, when I was a kid, Democrats were the ones to be getting pussy, y'all.

But like, now they, now they don't.

so I can't be fucking with them.

They said they got pussy at the Oval Office and said, what it said, whatever the fuck you is wanting to say.

Like, you know what I mean?

Yeah, his problem was that Obama and Biden didn't have, uh, they didn't have sex scandals in the Oval Office.

Yeah.

And he also said that Democrats used to support rap music, but now they don't anymore.

Like, what does that even mean?

Like, yeah, I guess Joe Biden didn't really, I mean, I, they kind of did.

It's just not really notable.

Like, when, when Megan the Stallion goes to a Kamala event, it's like, oh, whatever.

Like, yeah, of course that would happen.

But then when Lil Pump goes to the Donald Trump rally and he says, Lil Pimp, Lil Pimp, he came to my rally.

Like, that's that's a clippable moment.

That's memorable.

Lil Baby met with Kamala when he made that, like, very, um,

you know, he had that protest song that he wrote on the car ride to the White House.

Does anyone remember that?

The little, not, not in the slightest.

I don't remember Lil Baby.

It was called, called like,

We Gotta Make a Change.

And it was like,

everyone's gotta vote.

Politics is a moat.

We're drowning in the water, but it's about to get harder.

It's like one of the worst protest songs ever, but he met with Kamala because of it.

But that was when like Lil Baby was really cool.

It's like cooler than anyone Donald Trump met with.

All the guys that Trump met with, besides like Forgioto Blow, were like, you know, guys who had already went insane a lot of the time.

Yeah, people on their way out.

Yeah.

Even Lil Wayne.

No disrespect to him, but if it was 2008, he would not be posing with Republicans.

That's a good point.

I do want to, the next piece I want to talk about is about, you know, like on the topic of young people and Donald Trump there is a profile there was a profile in the New York Times this week about the headline is she's young Trump friendly and has a White House press pass this is about this lady Natalie Winters who's now in the sort of like one of the kind of like right-wing streamer influencers she works with Steve Bannon who's now in the White House press corps which is you know like a development that I I find I I find encouraging actually Did you guys see Tim Poole ask a ask a question to the uh White House press poll?

I mean, when I say a question, it was really more of a comment than a question,

but he had his beanie on it

met with Netanyahu, really, like, yeah, I mean, did he think he was wearing a yarmulke?

Wow, this guy must be really Jewish, yeah, he's got the biggest yamuka I've ever seen.

Yeah,

that's remember when Trump was talking, remember when Trump was talking about Biden, and he was like, biggest mask I'd ever seen?

That's if that rule applied with Yamakans.

Yeah.

Like some guy with a cowboy hat is the most Jewish man on the planet.

It's the most unorthodox man on the planet.

But are you guys familiar with this woman, Natalie Winters?

Yeah, I don't.

I think I've seen the name.

Yeah, she's like,

I don't know.

We've all been to the Atlanta airport.

That's what I'll say.

I don't know.

I don't want to be gross, but it's just like, do you remember last time

when Trump was president and there were all types of like evil babes?

And now it's

like, oh my God.

Well, she's not evil.

Yeah, it's just boring.

Yeah, it's just, they just,

I'm not saying ugly.

I'm just saying it's like, I've been to the airport.

Every time I watch a Trump thing with all these like new influencers, I just feel like I'm in line at TSA.

The most normal, stupid people.

I've ever seen.

Well, there does seem to be like a sort of a Trump 2 look to the women in his orbit.

You know, like, I think he has sort of a type.

But

I just want to read from the beginning of this piece here.

It begins like this.

The waitress was pouring tap water, but Natalie Winters was quick to ask for bottled.

No fluoride for our dear dinner guests, she said, guest-jarring to me.

Only filtered water and pesticide-free limes.

Real interesting.

This was in a movie from like 70 years ago.

Did they give you like plain tap water at a restaurant like that?

I mean, I guess she's right.

Like, if you're at at a fancy restaurant in dc and they're giving you water it probably should come through a filter i don't want just tap water straight from the sink i always get tap water when they always say tap or sparkling i always say tap yeah i mean sparkling it's it's harder to drink that

if you're really thirsty

but like you can't really like chug it down if you're really thirsty like

it has its place but it's no replacement you've never done that you you've never done that like you have you ever had like i don't know i did i had to go to the hospital the bubbles hurt too much.

I was coughing and throwing up and crying, and it was horrible.

But

I like the

beginning of this profile because it provides like a glimpse into sort of restaurant etiquette in D.C.

So, yeah, she requests from the waiter only filtered water and pesticide-free limes.

And I'm just like, you know, it's like an Ace Rostein moment.

Like, you know,

a giant bag of limes.

Be like, I want you to check each one of these for pesticide.

The ones that have pesticide, put them in this bucket.

And then the ones with no pesticide, put them in the other.

Like, I assume most restaurants get all of their citrus fruit from like one supplier.

And I don't know how many citrus farms don't use pesticide.

Yeah, I don't know.

That's one of those fruits where you're not really eating the skin.

Yeah.

So it doesn't matter.

But she goes on here.

She says, the article continues, We were sitting in the back corner of Butterworth's, a Capitol Hill bistro that has become a destination for friends and supporters of President Trump.

Stephen K.

Bannon, Mrs.

Winter's current boss, has hosted private events there.

Her former boss, Raheem Kassam, the editor-in-chief of the National Pulse, is an investor.

The menu that night featured lamb tartare, oysters, brulee, and pork cheeks.

Sounds pretty good.

Ms.

Winters and I had met for dinner, or so I had thought.

Honestly, she said, I'm probably not going to eat because that's my brand.

I don't eat at restaurants because I don't like the seed oils that they use.

Oh, my God.

Can you get that?

Come on, virtue signal.

Yeah.

I just need to.

Just because you have a reporter there doesn't mean you have to do that.

For me, it's just like all of them look like they're at the airport.

They all look like just normal idiots I see all the time.

None of them even have like an interesting thing.

All the Trump One people had like some weird thing.

Like, you know, Roger Stone's a swinger.

Steve Bannon was dying.

Like they all.

that hope hicks is the most beautiful woman ever.

Faith Goldie was beautiful.

But now it's just like, I could go to the airport and hear this conversation from a woman who looks exactly like this.

Yeah, there aren't cranks anymore.

I've seen a million fucking idiots pretend that they like go out and like and ask if they're seed oils and stuff.

Yeah.

It's just generic influencers following the trends of the year.

Everyone, yeah.

It just everyone like

has been looking for seed oils since like 2022 and they look exactly the same.

I just I don't give a shit.

It used to be people that were internet savvy.

They had to have some sort of horrible, debilitating mental illness.

If you were someone that was like filming, like 10 years ago, people that were filming themselves and like trying to get famous on Twitter and stuff,

those people were interesting, like us.

But then now they make so many of them that they're just generic 21-year-olds.

Oh my God.

Like even like, even like, you know, Brianna Wu, right?

It was like to be a singularly insane person.

Yeah,

to break out of the mold, to become someone who we knew, she went on TV and was like, I made a game about these sexy cats who live in a space station and a sniper tried to kill me.

Like, that's, I mean, she, she came up with something I'd never heard before.

And it's just like this fucking,

even she's boring now.

She's just a generic neoliberal Zionist.

It's not even interesting.

Yeah.

Oh, my God.

It's so depressing.

Yeah.

But she's going to talk about seed oils in like five years, too.

That'll be her next thing.

Yeah, everything's just standardized, everything's just like it's put in a box where you're just following the trending topics, the trending buzzwords.

It's also mechanized and soulless.

To that point, like I think it's interesting that this DC bistro, uh, Mrs.

Butterworth's or whatever, is frequented by Steve Bandon.

And a and basically a co-owner of the restaurant is her former boss at the National Paul's.

But like, if that's the case, why are they still using seed oils to cook with?

Yeah.

Like, wait, like, like, what the fuck?

And what's crazy?

probably because it's more expensive and the people in the kitchen are like you yeah you we're not doing this bullshit because they used to get mad at stuff like that like oh i have allergies can you take the gluten out of this can you excuse me i only have uh free-range eggs in my diet like

you're baking grease into your into your food fucking stupid library it's probably not very easy to get that over with the kitchen to say you got to take you got to take this out and you only have to have pesticide-free organic limes from this one farm if you could source it from amish country that would be great they're like fuck you eat a burger i i used to i used to date a girl who had a uh like severe peanut allergy like she had to carry an epi pen around with her because like she could you know like her throat would close up if she even like got a whiff of peanut oil cooking so it's like she to eat at a restaurant she would have to like it would have to be like a zero peanut oil establishment because like like even if like a utensil that they use to prepare food in the kitchen like touches like a molecule of peanut oil It could it could like potentially kill her like these people are like that now, except they don't have any actual allergy.

It's just something they read.

Yeah, and here's what I'm learning like here's what I'm saying about this is like if you were going out to a restaurant and like you know even if it's your interview or whatever and like you know like I'm looking at the menu here lamb tartare pork cheeks oysters brulee that all sounds quite good to me and it's sort of the thing like I like you know if you're if you were raised in the type of house that had like huge two liter bottles of soda in the fridge and like, you know, Lucky Charm cereal every morning for breakfast, I would say that's probably like not the healthiest lifestyle to, you know, imbue to a kid.

But at the same time, it's like, do you really want your kid never to have soda?

Like, you know, at the pizza party, you know, like if you're out for dinner at a restaurant, like you could have a little seed oil, you know, treat yourself to a nice.

They can have diet soda.

Yeah.

Well, that, that's, I mean, when people are like, oh, there used to be a center in this, that is the one thing.

There did used to be like a center on

i mean i um i grew up in a house where it's like we had this that horrible like organic brown bread oh my god felix i had a friend whose parents were like they only bought the bread with nuts in it oh my god yeah oh god oh yeah

we ate the same food that seth bullock ate every day we had that shitty stir peanut butter and unsalted almonds my dad would bring this horrible proana lunch to his work

it was listen to this This is so depressing.

It was like four raw almonds, like the unaltered, horrible, spongy, brown, organic bread with the shitty stir peanut butter.

I hate that.

I hate that.

I hate that.

I hate it.

Three apricots.

Skippy only for me.

Three apricots.

That was like his glucose for the day.

And then a

warm seltzer that had just been nicely warming up in that bag.

He was white Obama.

He was

like a Chicago guy.

I think he was

Eli Weisel's knight, judging by that lunch.

He was

a lifestyle influencer.

Primo Levy's if this is a lunch.

I don't know why he did it, but

you know,

we had all that shit in our house.

And my mom was like an amazing cook and still is.

But it was also like, on Friday, we get to have soda.

That was, that, that was, that was centrism, you know?

Yeah.

You had to expose them to it or else they go to college and they just go crazy.

They get the freshman to want to do it.

They get an OD on Mountain Dew their first week.

It's like the people that are raised on abstinence and then they go to church camp and they come back pregnant.

No, it's like that with sodas.

Yeah.

That happens to every like,

you know, real life Jennifer Melfies kid.

They go to fucking college.

They go to any university and they're like, oh my God, white bread.

And that's all they eat.

I got exposed to white bread when I went to non-Jewish camp.

You have to, it's just like peanuts.

I love that you specifically went to non-Jewish camp.

What is with Jews and regular bread?

I don't, well, I mean, bread is like, we didn't get bread at this vital time.

We didn't have time to make it.

And it really, we really got a complex about it.

Going to the article, I mean, like,

it's just basically some like not very interesting details about her life.

Growing up in Santa Monica, California, the daughter of a physician father and a stay-at-home mother, she attended Harvard-Westlake, an elite prep school in LA.

You know, pretty standard like career and life half of someone who goes into like, you know, political media.

She says of working for Steve Bennon's war room.

It's very gonzo, which I like, she said.

I think of it as an IQ test every day.

You fail?

What?

That's a really dumb thing to say.

Oh my god.

Like you're rotating shapes.

You're doing word problems the same like it's just always the same person oh no way you're your your dad was like some insurance guy or something and you grew up upper middle class went to a private school and you now all you care about is politics stuff no way i thought your dad would be one of those guys that turned into those canned turkeys in iraq and i thought your mom would have sold you And I thought, you know, I thought you lived in Carnival and Steve Bannon saved you.

And that's why you got into politics.

No, you're just like all these other fucking people.

Yeah, like, how is this interesting at all?

Why?

And it's not like there aren't people on the right who are who do come from sort of an interesting background, like they used to be hippies or some shit like that.

And then there are all these ways that people who are in traditionally not Republican demographics came over to the party.

But someone like that, like a doctor's daughter who grew up in the suburbs and went to prep school, like a young blonde woman, like, how is that interesting?

Why is that even worth writing about why can't they interview mead mead skelton yeah yeah he's an interesting person yeah he's a great interview he tells you about like his succubus dream and

and how he wants to have a girl room and a boy room and all this amazing stuff wait what's girl room and a boy room oh he had a video he's this guy who's like a middle-aged uh closeted gay man who's a nazi and he loves the confederacy

no he's one of my favorite characters and i love his songs.

He had a video about what he wants from his future wife.

And he said, I'll have my boy room and then she'll have her girl room.

We'll sleep in separate bedrooms just off the room.

Yeah, yeah, okay.

I remember that.

I remember that.

I love Mead.

Mead's.

He's like Lindsey Graham's looper.

Yeah.

It's like, I wonder if they see each other and they're like, they both think the other's life is terrible because Mead's like, he's a cuck who has to be nice to Jews.

I'm cool.

And Lindsey Graham's like, oh my God, like, he's, he's, oh my God.

Does he know how gay he sounds?

So gay, and he has to sleep next to his mom's corpse.

I threw mine out years ago.

I just want to get to the end of the

Natalie Winters piece.

Because like, yeah, like it just goes on about like, you know, her political awareness is when they had a walkout for the parkland shooting at her high school.

And she was like, why are you even doing this?

That was like 100 months ago.

That was

an iridium kid gets mad at that when they say we're walking out of class to protest whatever.

Okay, absolutely.

I don't care what it is.

Yeah, and don't you say the classes are like making you gay?

Yeah, like the classes that are making you gay, and they're like, they're teaching you that, like, I don't know, something wrong about slavery, that it wasn't, that they're saying it wasn't fun enough.

That they didn't like it, they didn't like it.

Hey,

we can't leave our gay indoctrination classes that's making me trans that I hate and I'm going to kill our teacher.

This was 10 years ago, lady.

Did anything happen to you since then?

Fucking Jesus.

Yeah, anybody who gets radicalized like that in high school, that just sucks so bad.

You shouldn't even admit to that.

If you got radicalized by some bull, like you had an argument with your teacher or something, and that's what my politics are defined by as a 30-year-old.

Like, you got to make something up.

There's a great quote from Steve Bandon here.

He says of her, she's essentially a nerd at heart.

Oh, yeah, sure.

And just closing out the article, he says, at Butterworth, true to her word, Ms.

Winters had only bottled water during our three-hour talk.

Three hours?

And you don't even get an app?

This was really worth you getting on a plane, writing this down.

Like, why did you do this?

She had sparkling water, the most boring fucking woman anyone has ever met.

Holy shit, this is just, this article is like boring woman has meal.

It doesn't have meal.

Why does this exist interface?

Boring woman doesn't have meal.

Yeah.

Just go to one of their houses and just let them talk to you for three hours.

It says,

she said she has had two drinks in her life and has never done drugs.

I like to think that

her having the bottle of water at this interview was the second drink she's had in her life.

Somehow she's managed to live without liquids this long.

Yeah, she absorbs dew.

Felix, you're really going to love how unique and sparkling this person is and how interesting she is as a news subject here.

She also has a biting lifestyle brand.

Items for sale include a tank top with more insecure than the border plastered across the front and a tote that reads a little conspiratorial.

You're really schizo.

You love the elected president who loves Israel.

Yeah.

I'm crazy.

I heard about Jeffrey Epstein and Diddy.

I read Wikipedia.

It's really crazy.

You really have to get deep into the

content minds to find out about that shit.

I'm on the dark web, Wikipedia.

It's a crazy schizo fucking site.

The only problem with it is it's too biased against fucking Israel.

But then it would be, if they fixed that, it would be the perfect schizo thing for lunatics like me who drinked LaCroix.

Oh my fucking God, kill me, kill yourself.

Let's go to the restaurant and drink fucking pure seed oil and kill ourselves.

You fucking airport idiot.

Fucking moron.

Shit.

I hate her so much.

Her cable news.

She's inspired out of anyone.

And it's just because she is.

I've seen 50 other people like this that all have articles about them.

I went to fucking Shake Shack with

Tamami Gertz.

Her dad's a lawyer.

She's never had beer.

How Helmet, like, stop fucking making these people.

Give me more needs.

Give me a polymath musician gay guy who's never held a hand.

Yeah, we need some more crazy people.

Jesus Christ.

Oh, by the way, Felix, speaking of people who keep having articles written about them.

I did notice the other day, dateline Thursday, April 24th, there's another article about the pro natalist couple who like named their kids Magnus Industrious Rex and like, you know, want everyone to have eight kids eight nine ten kids there's another article them and the guy that measures his son's penis they pay for so many articles oh my god like they're the they're the only reason that print media is still functioning that they can even pay out salaries because those people are just doing paid media every single day this is like a monkey's paw thing in like 2018 people were like i'm sick of reading about like the new 17 year old white rapper who like you know got me too i'm so i hate this okay you got your wish there's only three articles now, and they get posted every day.

They keep writing it.

It's the disgusting, ugly couple that hit their kids that are raising their blind, ugly children to have CTE.

And not in the traditional way, by getting them to play football.

They're doing it.

No, they're born with it.

Yeah,

they're rocking those kids' world.

And,

you know, the new like boring woman who uh she hates she hates you know the the new type of oil that you're not supposed to drink and uh the guy who plays with his pig but i kind of like him he's like the only one i kind of like yeah i fuck with him i fuck with that he's that guy i keep thinking like it's there's a really bad article about him is going to come out where it's like um he measured a a kid who wasn't his son's penis

and it's i'll have to stop supporting him, but it hasn't happened yet.

Well, you got to have a control group.

Oh, wait, I thought you were.

How old is his son, like 21?

You got to measure every other 21-year-old's penis around the world.

I love that, like,

I love the idea that measuring your son's erections contributes meaningfully to prolonging your life.

You know, it's like, we got to get all the data.

We got to get all the data.

I just like that he's doing it like every day.

I mean, that is really like fucking up the sun because it's like, oh it didn't get any bigger after age 21 yeah

mine did

oh i uh just quick correction though i mean uh when i said i with him i thought felix i thought you were referring to the guy who drinks his urine and like you know a pre-cum and you know probably

uh that guy who like talks about ancient celtic ways of piss drinking and uh cum guzzling but for health reasons i like that guy probably brian johnson i don't like i don't i think he's evil no i know who you're exactly who you're talking about.

That like awesome, like bald freak.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, the bald guy.

Yeah, there are no like articles about him.

Yeah, what are the articles about that guy?

It's a hard pitch.

There's this guy that eats his own poop.

There's this crazy guy that eats

in his own mouth.

I think it's just he's loads and piss.

I think the New York Times magazine would be a great home for this.

I mean, like, how is that?

Like, how is that worse than this

Natalie Jessica article?

Natalie Jessica article?

It would be more interesting.

I didn't even get to the end of this article here because, I mean,

if you were word-feeling her before, I mean,

just keep an open topic.

Oh, is Shodi bad?

Yeah,

Shaudi's real bad.

So it says here, God.

Her cable news network of choice is MSNBC, which she watches partly to generate material.

She said that in another world, she might have been a poetry professor.

I always joke, in my day-to-day life, I'm really a lib at heart, she said.

That's a good idea.

Really?

No way.

You fucking.

No way.

Wow,

you mean in your personal life, you live in such a way that maximizes your own individuality and enjoyment, but in your day-to-day political life, you sort of are, you know, you believe the opposite.

And evidence of how she's a lib at heart, she goes, she also loved Barbie and agreed with the monologue delivered by America Ferrara, in which her character says, it's literally impossible to be a woman.

But Ms.

Winter's caveats, it's also really hard to be a man.

She added that scores of women younger than she had asked her not only for career advice, but also for tips on how to be like her.

I love it.

She's like,

I really,

I'm a limit hard because I liked the movie Barbie, but I'm a based mega conservative because I add the caveat.

It's really hard to be Ken, too.

They asked for tips to be like, first of all, no, they didn't.

Everyone knows how to do that.

You live in the airport.

You sleep in the airport.

You wash your face in the sink that like a really bad kid got.

they changed his diaper in.

You only eat like those legume snacks they offer at the airport.

You sleep on the plane, you drink the water in the jet blue bathroom.

Just hold your breath, hold it, hold your breath, stand up, pass out, spin around, get high off that, get addicted to that.

And then you can be as fucking boring as this piece of shit that I hate.

I would given the choice between like, um, you know, know hearing about her lunch and like listening to the ad, I would we didn't hear about her lunch, Felix.

We heard nothing about her lunch.

All right, that was the point of the article.

She doesn't eat food, she's broan.

By the way, I did look at the beginning of the article.

She said, Not eating is sort of my brand.

Yeah, that's that's another really oh, that's unique.

Yeah, what a unique thing.

A conservative young woman,

a conservative young woman who grew up in Southern California.

Wow.

Do you do Coke too?

But it's like, why did they go go to a restaurant?

So she could be there and be like, I, wow, I sure don't like these places.

Yeah, so she can say, yeah, I don't like restaurants.

I don't like eating.

I don't like the water they have here or the food.

And if you're taking up a table at a butterworth at Mrs.

Butterworth's restaurant for three hours and not ordering anything, that's also kind of like stealing, you know?

And that's that's rude to other patrons and the staff of the restaurant.

What do they know?

They're vile seed oil merchants trying to poison us.

I was talking to someone last week about why, you know, RFK really gets our goat

besides the obvious, you know?

Well, the way he loves it sounds.

Yeah, the killing the wife thing, stealing her body, his other rapes.

But,

you know, allegedly.

Yeah, allegedly, we should say.

Is it allegedly if like they're like, hey, did you like, do this?

And he's like, okay, who hasn't?

Okay, sometimes I was bad.

Well, that was his response.

They were like, he said, I'm no choir boy.

You did this to a 16-year-old babysitter.

And he's like, I'm no choir boy.

I'm no choir boy.

I'm more of a priest, if you catch my drift.

But,

you know, we were talking, like, why is this so annoying now?

And it was because, you know, this used to be cordonal.

This used to be, if you were into this shit where like, hey, everyone, there's a new type of bug that you can like swallow whole and he's going to clean your bowels.

Or

don't take the pet vaccine because all electricity will fucking stick to you.

Like all this fucking idiot shit that you would see, you know, every

on every like, you know, every time that you like went onto a work computer that didn't have ad block, these were the kind of articles, like the AdSense articles.

And it was cornered off to Facebook and like that part of the world, the stupids world, and it was fine.

Like, whatever.

I don't care what they do.

They can have fun.

Like, chemtrail people, yeah, but now it's like it's like saying the Pledge of Allegiance in a public school.

It's like we have to get up every day and hear this fucking idiot talk about like what type of mulch he's putting in his water.

And it's like, and they still don't do anything about it.

Yeah.

Like, why aren't we banning all these chemicals then if they're all so dangerous?

Well, no, no, no, no, no, no, you don't ban the chemicals, you just tell people so that they can avoid it.

So then when they die of being poisoned by them, it's their fault.

Yeah.

It's like, i i am aware that you need a passport to go to certain countries i've i've paid my taxes i've i've i've done all this stuff in my all this stuff that the normals do the stupids cannot i you know i i've i've gone to a place where they speak a different language and i didn't just take off my clothes and sprint through a plate glass window i i don't have to i should not have to like hear about this or know these people but instead it is just it is forced into our life it's like um you know how those Ukrainians are like,

it's so awful how they made us eat like Russian ice cream.

They colonized our mind, like all those crazy ones who live in Canada now.

Yeah.

I used to be like, that's so, like, what are you talking about?

But now I know how they feel.

That's what it's like

having RFK

not be executed for all the sexual crimes.

It's just, and it just, it is like a constant indignity how stupid all this is, but also just how boring boring it is.

They're just saying the same shit to each other and to you and the fucking seed oils.

Yeah, conspiracies aren't interesting anymore.

You're Barbie's based.

So much of the weird shit, the esoteric shit, it just isn't interesting anymore.

Like the Epstein stuff, joking about Epstein, that's not funny anymore.

Any of the

alternative health shit, that's not funny anymore.

All like the crueler aspects of the internet, that's not funny anymore.

It's all just been mainstreamed and it's boring now and it's ruined.

There's nothing interesting or edgy.

It's like, look at my crazy Epsom didn't hang himself ugly Christmas sweater.

We're going to play conspiracy trivial pursuit where we figure out what fluoride is.

And it's the most boring people in the world being like, I'm Schizo.

I'm so schizo, guys.

I just read some Wikipedia articles.

I'm freaking schizo.

I'm crazy.

Have you made, it's like, have you met a real schizo?

First of all, they become obsessed with they do, and then they post about him, and they're like, we got to kill all these people on the streets.

Why aren't the cops just shooting these people on site?

Anyway, I'm schizo.

I'm the only guy who's been accosted by like all types of actual schizophrenics, and they all rap at me.

And I will never get them killed by the police like these guys.

Well, yo, Felix, that's why Republicans support rap music now.

It used to be the Democrats to support schizophrenic people, but now it's like, yo, what's up?

Republicans have more schizophrenic rappers on their side than they used to, for sure.

Yeah, that is definitely true.

Uh, like, so I just have to close out.

I have to close out Natalie Jessica here.

It says, How is that?

I keep thinking like it's over, and then just one more paragraph.

This is an extra one more paragraph.

Yeah, it's a biography.

It's them going to lunch in real time, a thousand pages of talking to the most boring fucking woman of all time.

Robin Carlos getting started on the Natalie Jessica saga, Master of the Bistro.

Yeah, Volume 104.

One more podcast.

Oh my God.

The sheikh from Taken wouldn't buy her.

Remember, he buys that stupid girl who like, she's turning like 27 and her dad buys her like a sing-along cassette.

She's like, oh my God, I love it.

She's like slow, but the shake is like, I can't wait to have sex with her.

This is going to be great.

But the shake would meet Natalie Jessica and be like, take her back.

No gunfights, please.

I don't want her.

Given.

Returned.

I have a certain set of receipts.

You have to take my shitty, boring daughter.

I have the original credit card.

I can't listen to my daughter talking about how based Barbie is again.

I'm going to kill myself.

Wasn't that movie like four years ago?

It feels like so long ago.

Barbie.

Yeah, Barbie was in, it came out in 2019.

In

13 years ago.

Okay, I promise you, this is the last paragraph of this article.

Like a growing Gen Z contingent, she is anti-app, meaning dating apps.

One day, she would like to settle down with a man she can be submissive to, she said.

She added that she had been wronged in past relationships, which only stoked her ambitions.

I was like, I'm going to get revenge, she said.

You can watch me on TV being the next big deal.

Yeah, that sounds like a very traditional submissive stuff.

That's what she means by the live stuff.

Like, I'm kind of a live at heart because I don't just want to get pregnant at 18 and just never leave the house and never be seen by anybody.

I actually want to have my own career and maybe like hold off on dating until I'm in my 30s and, you know, just really explore who I am as a person.

But also, I'm a trad.

I'm a.

I need a man I can be submissive to.

Yeah.

But like, not if that entails the man saying, I don't want you working a job or being on TV or sharing your opinions publicly.

Yeah, I just, she thinks she's going to be like super, like, and culture, but like super fun.

And it's like, the only way you would ever get big on TV is if you got kidnapped in 2003, you have a face for that, but not for whatever the fuck you want to do.

I don't know.

I'm sorry.

It just, God,

I would, I would be a submissive non-sexual.

I'm really tired.

I have had a lot to do this weekend.

That's why I'm in such a weird mood today.

Maybe like the next time

I get well rested, I go to the gym, we could have a romantic relationship.

But it's a submissive relationship.

And

I'll tell you, just go to a restaurant and act fucking normal.

No more seed oil shit.

That's the strength of the story.

Drink the regular water.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Talk about Reacher or all the little beautiful things.

Show for girls.

Don't talk about the shit that I've seen from a thousand accounts.

There you go.

She could record that.

She could listen to it.

Done.

A perfect aromantic asexual relationship between two asexuals who are also not friends with each other.

That's trad.

Yeah.

For a lot of people, it was.

Yeah.

All right, gang, let's leave it there for today.

That was Natalie Jessica.

And, you know, some surprising things about a Gen Z conservative that may strike you as a little bit odd, a little bit out there, a little bit crazy and out there.

She is weird.

She needs to be in a straitjacket.

You know, she's a bit, think about her as she's a bit of a nerd at heart.

You know, her interests are a bit esoteric.

She didn't even elaborate on that part at all.

Well,

she's a nerd.

Like, what does that mean?

Like, she likes to say that.

It's because it says she insists she'd be happy spending her days sifting through federal databases.

She's essentially a nerd at heart.

So, like, that was the setup for that.

Oh, God.

I mean, I guess you're into politics.

Yeah.

I mean, yeah, like, I would hope.

I would hope that you know like what the federal government is, you fucking dope.

I'm a nerd.

I go to the Wikipedia page for Congress.

I do my job.

So I can remember which one is which.

I know where the federal buildings are.

I'm a real nerd.

Oh, my fucking God.

It would be funny if she was doing this like interview where she's like,

I'm crazy.

I'll go to a restaurant and be like,

do you have Heinz ketchup?

I think the Hunt's ketchup tastes weird.

And then a cop kills her because she's so insane.

Ashley Babbitt was just trying to get pesticide-free limes in the Capitol building.

That's what happened there.

She would have been interested.

Yeah, that would have been a great interview.

She was a woman with some spunk.

I loved her.

She had some rants to go on.

I was really sad what happened.

Yeah, she was like a big psycho.

Yeah,

that is an endangered species.

You know how China brought back the golden snub-nosed monkey?

They did.

They were like, yeah, they were like almost extinct.

And they were like thousands.

They took regular monkeys and punched them in the nose.

Pushed their nose in a little bit.

That's what they've been doing with pandas for years.

They're just spray painting regular bears, pawning them off to American zoos.

We've talked about China's scam with pandas before on the show.

Yeah, there are no pandas.

That's a man in a suit.

It's definitely not a regular bear.

It's way sillier.

No.

Why don't they kill people if it's a bear?

How is it a bear and it's not dangerous?

Yeah, I've played all the dynasty orders and it's never happened.

No, I was saying that China, because of their success in like bringing back all these amazing species, they should breed babbits because we're running out of them and all we have is like this lady.

Yeah, they should figure out how to create white women in a lab.

What if they figure that out

no you know you know what i mean i'm tired of i'm tired of relying on the pronatalist couple to create more white women

we need operation warp speed for batshit insane white women they can't make a babbitt like that if ashley babbitt was had those parents shitty ocular genetics but they're never making a pilot um

she would have not even made it to sprinting into that bullet like she did.

Like, she would have not made it to the Capitol.

But i think like babbitts are the natural uh predator for this type of boring woman they just see them and like they're like you're the from best buy and just start hitting well it's like yeah it's like you look at they create the they create i'm gonna she starts taking a picture of her license plate

you're your your dog gave my dog fucking anxiety yeah your dog gave my dog a dirty look yeah but like i know it feels it's like it's like it's like the gentrification of crank culture it's like people like the Babbitts, they create the culture, and then the vultures like Natalie Juska come in and just sort of pick and choose and just adopt it for themselves and be like, you know, like, I'm a bit conspiratorial.

Like, you know, I hate actual colours.

They wear it as a costume.

Yeah.

Yeah.

It's exactly costume, not culture.

Where was Natalie Winters at Jan 6?

Probably watching the Barbie movie.

Yeah, probably watching the Barbie movie.

Under what circumstances would she ever like, could you ever see her where like there's a cop on the other side of a door and he's like, don't come to the door.

And she's like, guess what?

I think I can get through it.

You know,

I know my rights.

Like, God, yeah,

I can go wherever I want.

The door's already open, you asshole.

And then dies.

You can't see it.

She just doesn't have that in her.

Well, best of luck to her and her career.

And I can't wait for the memoir written at the age of 22.

Yeah, I want to know more.

God.

They're going to make me read that memoir during my anti-Semitism trial.

It's my punishment.

i mean she feel like she's probably going to convert to judaism in a year or two or be one of those evangelical jews that's a they're coming that's too that's too interesting for her all right we'll see maybe she'll see

me yeah maybe she'll measure some kids dick

that would be you know i don't think she'd do it but it'd be like new All right.

Let's leave it there for today's show.

We have anything to plug at the top, at the bottom of the show?

Yes.

As I mentioned on Thursday's show, we ended up with some overstock of Nopasaron, Matt Christman's Spanish Civil War book.

We are putting this overstock back on sale this Wednesday, April 30th, starting at 8 a.m.

Pacific Time at chapotraphouse.store.

So if you missed out on our initial sale, there will be a very limited amount of overstock books.

on sale this Wednesday, April 30th, 8 a.m.

Pacific time, chapotraphouse.store.

Your last chance for the foreseeable future to order some of Matt's books online.

That is it for me.

And that is it for us as well.

Alex, thanks for coming back on.

Thank you.

Thanks for having me.

It's always a joy.

Till next time, everybody, bye-bye.

Bye-bye.

Mama whispers softly to me, honey.

Child,

eats your collar greens.

Don't forget to smile.

I see familiar faces I haven't seen in a while.

Tis good to be back home,

back in the old song,

back to the old sound.