Critical Role: Jester and Fjord’s Wedding: Live from Radio City Music Hall Part 1

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Speaker 13 Here's a quick podcast for all you true crime fans: the case of the missing Reese's.

Speaker 15 It was me at the store with my mouth.

Speaker 16 Motive?

Speaker 13 Um, they're Reese's. What was I going to do?

Speaker 18 Stop myself?

Speaker 15 Tune in next time to see if I do it again.

Speaker 19 Spoiler, I will.

Speaker 21 Wow, that had everything.

Speaker 19 Reese's, suspense,

Speaker 19 Reese's.

Speaker 23 Hey there, it's Liam O'Brien and welcome to the Critical Role Podcast Network.

Speaker 4 We're stoked you're here and thanks for making our stories part of your day. You're listening to part one of this episode right now and part two will arrive this upcoming Tuesday.

Speaker 4 If you'd rather listen to the full episode right now and without any ads, consider becoming a Beacon member.

Speaker 4 You'll receive access to exclusive content, discounts at all our online critical role shops, exclusive pre-sales for live events, and much more.

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Speaker 26 Well, that should cover it.

Speaker 4 Now let's dive into the adventure.

Speaker 27 Radio City, please welcome the cast of Critical Rolls

Speaker 27 and Regal!

Speaker 27 Williams O'Brien

Speaker 27 Talison champion

Speaker 27 Talison James

Speaker 27 Marisha Ray

Speaker 27 Ashley Johnson

Speaker 27 Travis Willingham

Speaker 27 And your dungeon master, Matthew Mercer

Speaker 29 Welcome, friends.

Speaker 30 We

Speaker 30 are down one member of our group, it looks like.

Speaker 34 Well, here, let us all remain seated so that everyone can receive the bride-to-be of this evening, Laura Bailey.

Speaker 34 Well

Speaker 37 now that we're all finally here

Speaker 38 Hello everybody and welcome to tonight's episode of Critical Role

Speaker 33 Where a bunch of us nerdy ass voice actors sit around at Radio City Music Hall with you playing the dragon

Speaker 11 sure

Speaker 43 That makes sense.

Speaker 44 But we're so happy to have you all here with us for this very special occasion.

Speaker 46 Yes. Hello, everybody.
Hello, New York City.

Speaker 46 As you all may realize, you are the very lucky, privileged few to get to see this wedding live as it happens in real time.

Speaker 47 In real time.

Speaker 46 So that means don't be a dick.

Speaker 46 Don't post spoilers of this online because everybody else will just have to wait and see. So enjoy your time.
Take your photos. Share your experiences.

Speaker 46 Just don't spoil anything that happens in the story.

Speaker 48 Yeah?

Speaker 50 Or else, right?

Speaker 51 Or else.

Speaker 46 I don't know what else, but or else.

Speaker 3 She will, or else you will.

Speaker 8 She will.

Speaker 54 Well, my friends, I believe that concludes our announcements for this live show.

Speaker 55 So, with that, let's go ahead and jump into tonight's live show episode of

Speaker 8 Critical Role.

Speaker 8 When the adventure begins, they were always beside you. Your nerdy best friends and the DM to guide you.
And they rise from the flames for the battles ahead.

Speaker 8 Then beware that you're about to be dead.

Speaker 8 They got magic and flare. They got factions incoming.
They will see you over there.

Speaker 8 There's a monster incoming. Inspiration is waiting.
Rise up, don't think twice. Put your fate in your hands.
Take a chance, roll the dice.

Speaker 8 Can you answer the call? Digging deep in your your soul. As the legend unfolds, now it's your turn

Speaker 8 to run.

Speaker 44 Hey, remember when that was a cool little animated thing, and now we're actually coming out with an a full animated thing soon?

Speaker 20 Anyway,

Speaker 58 an age has ended.

Speaker 54 The rise of the cult known as the Ruby Vanguard has locked the red moon of ill-omen Ruidis into their plot and the world did rise up to stop them.

Speaker 38 The existential threat to the gods themselves was rebuffed,

Speaker 45 binding them to the cycle of mortality.

Speaker 3 Alexandria now meets a new era with uncertainty.

Speaker 62 But in the midst of these struggles, a simple moment shined above many to bring renewed hope:

Speaker 26 a request to unite two heroic souls in matrimony.

Speaker 65 When Ford,

Speaker 29 pumped full of adrenaline,

Speaker 44 asked Jessica to be his bride,

Speaker 67 and she gratefully said yes.

Speaker 34 Now, sometime later, the very air around Nicodronis is abuzz

Speaker 33 with the imminent celebration.

Speaker 38 Horses, carriages, ships arrive to the gorgeous coastal port city from all over the world to gather for these nuptials.

Speaker 33 The lavish chateau itself is lively with employees redecorating the entire interior to host the evening reception to come, while the wedding parties finish sleeping off an eventful evening before.

Speaker 32 Ford,

Speaker 33 would you please describe to me?

Speaker 71 Yeah.

Speaker 73 Gotcha.

Speaker 74 Ford, if you would mind describing the chamber and the condition in which we find you

Speaker 76 in the early morning of the wedding day.

Speaker 77 Yes, yes, yes, of course.

Speaker 77 It's not exactly a chamber.

Speaker 8 You see, it's outdoors.

Speaker 77 I seem to have found my way with one arm still in the trough of the backside of the stables that I'm in.

Speaker 77 I think I came here for hydration at some point. I also smell a little bit like vomit and alcohol.

Speaker 77 I'm missing a sleeve for some reason.

Speaker 52 Just a sleeve.

Speaker 77 Don't ask me why and um uh nearby I can hear people uh drinking and the clatter of silverware and plates but I sort of start to sit up and

Speaker 11 oh god could the sun be any brighter oh where

Speaker 28 bow

Speaker 80 Like real shit.

Speaker 81 You left me out here with the pigs?

Speaker 46 No, I slept right beside you man. I wasn't gonna do that.

Speaker 46 Hey, oh wait, where's

Speaker 46 where's Caleb? I kind of like poke at a bale of hay.

Speaker 4 Caleb sits up, hair akimbo sticking totally up on one side.

Speaker 4 What time is it? Wait a minute, why do I not know exactly what time?

Speaker 5 Where are we?

Speaker 47 What?

Speaker 46 Yeah, we just had a little bottle service by way of Beauregard Lionette, so um

Speaker 46 But look, I planned for this. I knew this was going to happen.
And I pull out of my suit coat, out of my pocket, three little

Speaker 46 tiny

Speaker 46 bottles of lighter registration potions.

Speaker 82 Okay.

Speaker 46 Just a little, like, you know, a little liquid IV.

Speaker 41 Take the edge off.

Speaker 11 Yeah, a little

Speaker 46 electrolytes, and I hand it over to him.

Speaker 8 Oh, you're a lifesaver.

Speaker 84 This is absolutely amazing.

Speaker 4 Before anyone quops a potion, a completely manicured, in-place to the nines, Caleb pops his head in the doorway of this place. Oh, are you all awake now?

Speaker 78 Is everyone good?

Speaker 78 Oh, yeah, remember?

Speaker 85 No, I don't.

Speaker 46 That's our DD.

Speaker 78 Double, double, what?

Speaker 4 Well, you said you wanted to steal a boat, and I didn't think that we should have everyone be completely for schnickered, so I withstained while Caleb Prime enjoyed himself, and I have been standing guard outside all night but is my nightmare over?

Speaker 77 It is probably the lionette liquor still in my veins. Did he say we wanted to steal a boat? We did steal a boat.

Speaker 46 Yeah, not wanted my friend. Succeeded.

Speaker 86 Of course.

Speaker 77 Of course we did, my chums.

Speaker 51 Ha ha.

Speaker 51 We stole a boat.

Speaker 87 Yes, we did.

Speaker 46 Look, we delivered it back home. The guy will never know.

Speaker 88 Caleb 1 says, I don't remember any of that.

Speaker 4 Caleb 2 says, oh, you had quite a time of it. You are running around the deck, throwing fire in the L, yelling, Eldritch Blest, Eldritch Blest, all night long.

Speaker 4 For 67 minutes it went on. Before you passed out.

Speaker 77 Sometimes that's all you've got.

Speaker 46 Do you remember what we named the boat? It was awesome. It was a great idea.
I had a good idea.

Speaker 77 Yeah, we'll say this name at the same time.

Speaker 85 Yeah, okay, ready?

Speaker 86 One, four, two, three, four.

Speaker 46 Last mistake.

Speaker 90 Did you say foreskin?

Speaker 78 No, why would you hear that?

Speaker 46 It's not a bad name for a boat.

Speaker 4 Hear what you want to hear.

Speaker 77 I'm glad we got it back in its owner's hands. That's very responsible of us.

Speaker 91 Yes.

Speaker 78 Did anyone die?

Speaker 4 No, it came close.

Speaker 4 We managed to jump aboard the ship from about 500 yards away. We took it out for a bit.
Bo entreated me to put a giant neon script on the side of the ship.

Speaker 4 So I'm pretty sure the government and the constabulary here are looking for us still because there was pyrotechnics in the middle of the harbor. And also,

Speaker 78 we were surrounded by water.

Speaker 4 Caleb, you also molded a rock out in the middle of the harbor into a naked pirate man with a tusk tooth on the butt.

Speaker 73 Oh, that's right.

Speaker 77 Chester's going to kill me to tell me we got away scot-free. No one saw our faces.
It went much better than the first time.

Speaker 15 Yeah.

Speaker 46 It's fine. What do you wait? It's fine.

Speaker 32 Meanwhile,

Speaker 33 elsewhere in Nicodranus,

Speaker 3 the morning after her bachelorette evening shenanigans,

Speaker 33 Jester, if you wouldn't mind describing where we find you and in what condition.

Speaker 94 Oh, you find me

Speaker 94 in my bed at the lavish chateau,

Speaker 94 silk, fluffy pillows,

Speaker 94 and around me are all of my friends. We have Veth,

Speaker 94 Yasha,

Speaker 94 Kingsley,

Speaker 94 Essex,

Speaker 87 and Bern.

Speaker 87 Yeah.

Speaker 94 And we are all in matching silk pajamas.

Speaker 94 And just as beautiful as could be. In fact, flying in the door right now are a bunch of little hamster unicorns carrying trays of water and pastries and refreshments.

Speaker 71 That was such a wonderful night, you guys.

Speaker 95 It was. It's crazy how well rested I feel.
Yeah.

Speaker 96 Yeah.

Speaker 97 I thought we would have stayed out later, but I guess as your matron of honor, I just assumed you would have liked the place a little bit more that I chose.

Speaker 78 but well i mean nicodronus's only all-minotaur review strip show

Speaker 100 hot hot to trot

Speaker 10 yeah where you can always be horny on main

Speaker 94 it is a really great establishment you know i thought that you would like it more but but

Speaker 101 you know i i maybe that's a me thing yeah

Speaker 94 you know when you climbed the last minotaur and started riding his horns

Speaker 94 You know, I thought it was really funny, but the manager didn't and they kind of kicked us out

Speaker 94 Yeah, we didn't eat I don't know if you remember oh, I remember everything okay we only had milkshots.

Speaker 11 Yeah

Speaker 94 I know they're so good aren't they?

Speaker 102 They are my stomach is a little crazy.

Speaker 94 Well some had chocolate some had strawberry

Speaker 86 so good.

Speaker 78 Yeah, it was so sweet.

Speaker 10 And then we were home by nine o'clock.

Speaker 21 Yeah.

Speaker 96 Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 94 And then we did each other's makeup. It was so wonderful.

Speaker 94 Ezekiel, you look beautiful.

Speaker 103 Thank you kindly.

Speaker 44 He's currently like trying to wipe the eyeshadow out of his eyes before looking in the mirror and going, why did nobody tell me I look like a raccoon?

Speaker 91 But

Speaker 61 honestly,

Speaker 6 a very interesting menagerie cultural experience.

Speaker 3 Do you do this for every wedding?

Speaker 100 We haven't had a lot of weddings.

Speaker 8 Not too many. You should do this for every wedding.

Speaker 70 Especially Chadwick.

Speaker 100 Oh, Chadwick, aka Thunderhooves?

Speaker 109 A very talented young man.

Speaker 11 Yes.

Speaker 11 Oh, my God.

Speaker 101 Yes, did you go to the private room for a little while?

Speaker 41 No, I would never.

Speaker 102 Oh, okay, because you disappeared for a bit.

Speaker 18 Maybe that's your magic.

Speaker 110 I had to

Speaker 8 go deal with some things.

Speaker 71 Deal?

Speaker 109 But

Speaker 8 I am not.

Speaker 94 What did you have to do?

Speaker 33 I just had to steal myself.

Speaker 95 I am a parent.

Speaker 41 Yes, I am.

Speaker 111 It seemed like you were pretty steely.

Speaker 4 I can assure you all, he was not in the private room at any time.

Speaker 67 There is a specific

Speaker 104 shade of lavender blush that takes his face.

Speaker 7 He says, I am a devoted partner.

Speaker 33 but as we've both agreed, it's okay to look.

Speaker 101 What happens in Nicodranis stays in Nicodranis?

Speaker 11 You've never heard that before. I made it up to that.

Speaker 4 I was wondering.

Speaker 94 Oh, yes, do you smell pastries? Because they're in here.

Speaker 94 Did you want one?

Speaker 94 We have blueberry. We have raspberry.
These ones have mango.

Speaker 60 What is mango?

Speaker 94 Give it a drop.

Speaker 76 Floats in the middle air and slowly lowers.

Speaker 113 Way too ostentatious, this sort of glyph circle that surrounds the pastry as he glides it into his mouth and takes a little nibble.

Speaker 44 I like your friendship.

Speaker 47 Wait, where's Caduceus?

Speaker 94 He was here.

Speaker 108 Well, that's right.

Speaker 4 He was driving the cart, wasn't he? That was the last time I saw him.

Speaker 4 Cadus!

Speaker 45 About this time, downstairs within the actual Laba Chateau proper, within the main entertaining chap

Speaker 108 region of this massive, beautiful abode, you see the hanging massive iron chandeliers have been completely redecorated with ribbons of cream and pink of all shades, bows and flowers set upon this beautiful, almost tent-like tapestry above.

Speaker 109 There are all manner of small glowing globes that kind of sparkle and give little bursts of color being set up as various stools and stepladders are set up all around.

Speaker 24 The entire workforce here is darting back and forth to try and get things finished in time.

Speaker 3 As you can see, Marion herself, Jester's mother, currently wrapped in this beautiful like feather boa curled robe, is currently shouting directions to her various employees.

Speaker 54 Right behind them in the corner, you see

Speaker 113 an elven woman,

Speaker 104 looked to be kind of the human equivalent of 50s or so, long blonde hair,

Speaker 106 sit in a small booth currently next to Caduces.

Speaker 31 Her eyes kind of bloodshot, like she hasn't slept all night.

Speaker 37 This is Defirad Kolios, the hired wedding planner for the event, who is currently has a heavy ledger and a stack of papers,

Speaker 115 looks like three broken quills, and Caduceus to their side goes.

Speaker 121 Are we done with our business, Miss Clay?

Speaker 4 No, there's only just about four more things I wanted to bring up. I know that the flowers right now, it's the right shade of pink.

Speaker 30 Don't get me wrong, it's the beautiful shade of pink.

Speaker 4 It's going to be a little while, though. And as you know, flowers start to go.
By the time that the actual ceremony starts, this is going to be like maybe an off-salmon.

Speaker 4 I don't know if you've really...

Speaker 4 Has anyone actually thought this through?

Speaker 38 Mr.

Speaker 33 Clay, we have gone through all of the specifications with Chester and her family.

Speaker 44 Everything has been triple approved.

Speaker 104 I assure you, if the bride had any issues with it, I would have been notified.

Speaker 20 Could you please just leave me alone?

Speaker 89 Of course.

Speaker 64 Of course.

Speaker 4 Is that really how you fold napkins? That seems just

Speaker 109 speaking with my partner.

Speaker 104 And he gets up and steps away, at which point the doors

Speaker 37 kind of hit the sides heavily as Ford, Beauregard, and Caleb enter the establishment here in the late morning of the day.

Speaker 46 What's up, bridal bitches?

Speaker 38 You look around the chamber, and all you see is the various workers of the chateau and caduses.

Speaker 46 Oh.

Speaker 46 Where's the bridal party?

Speaker 53 At this point in time, you begin to hear the clop, clop, clop, clop, clop of most sets of feet, one gliding,

Speaker 115 as the bridal party, all wrapped up in their silk robes, their matching silk robes, descend from the staircase of the second floor of the chateau.

Speaker 28 Oh, hello!

Speaker 46 Did y'all party hardy?

Speaker 94 So hard.

Speaker 95 Yeah, it was real hard.

Speaker 95 I've never had so much milk.

Speaker 85 Uh-oh.

Speaker 4 I wish that was a euphemism. It's really not.

Speaker 19 Yeah, no.

Speaker 19 Ah!

Speaker 10 Ah, you're seeing each other!

Speaker 111 No!

Speaker 4 You're not supposed to see each other! Oh, Vector and Jester invisible.

Speaker 80 No one's dressed yet.

Speaker 94 Why can't we see each other?

Speaker 10 Isn't that a thing?

Speaker 46 I think it's when you're dressed up, right?

Speaker 101 I don't know. I'm just really on edge.

Speaker 100 It's been a lot being the matron of honor for this one over here.

Speaker 78 Everything has to be monogrammed.

Speaker 111 I haven't slept in days.

Speaker 11 I'm sorry.

Speaker 4 You see, this is what happens when there's not enough organization. People start to freak out.
It's no good for anybody.

Speaker 77 Of course, I mean, so much stress. That's why people go out and commit illegal acts the night before they get married.
You know, it's understandable.

Speaker 77 I'm sure you all are being chased by city guards as well, yes.

Speaker 94 Illegal acts, that is all weird. What are you talking about?

Speaker 85 It's just a joke, honey.

Speaker 4 Caleb turns to Caleb and says, I put you through enough. Good night.

Speaker 4 And he collapses in a pile of water on the floor.

Speaker 94 Ah, I was just about to invoke duplicity.

Speaker 11 That would have been so much fun.

Speaker 4 Maybe at the wedding, dear.

Speaker 50 Where are you, by the way?

Speaker 11 Oh, um, here.

Speaker 94 And I flick his ear.

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Speaker 13 Reese's peanut butter cups. They go perfectly with music,

Speaker 14 podcasts, and welcome back to the show.

Speaker 13 Even nature sounds.

Speaker 13 Oh, and the thing thing where someone crinkles tissue and whispers at you.

Speaker 132 Hello.

Speaker 8 Look, I'm not here to judge what you listen to.

Speaker 13 I'm here to judge you for not eating Reeses while you listen to it. Reese's.

Speaker 13 Ashley, go back to the nature sounds.

Speaker 13 Nice. Yeah, that's really nice.

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Speaker 92 Essa glides over to Caleb and says, Looks like you had quite an evening there, boy.

Speaker 4 We did all right. A little bit of vandalism, a little bit of awesome, you know.
Typical Friday night.

Speaker 50 How did you fare?

Speaker 103 Pretty well. Went to bed early.

Speaker 55 Broke in some beasts of burden.

Speaker 11 Jesus.

Speaker 49 Oh my God.

Speaker 73 Holy crap.

Speaker 11 Essex a freak.

Speaker 19 Essex goes hard.

Speaker 4 You will have to regale me later. By the way, I really like this smoky look.

Speaker 118 Oh, thank you kindly.

Speaker 70 Don't worry, I have an idea for our next date night.

Speaker 96 True polymorph.

Speaker 11 Yeah.

Speaker 139 You've all been a bad influence on this boy.

Speaker 140 Definitely.

Speaker 140 Baby.

Speaker 11 You look so hot in this robe.

Speaker 95 Thank you. I really like silk.

Speaker 141 Yeah, it kind of turns out.

Speaker 87 Yeah, it lays oil on my muscles.

Speaker 20 Yes, it does.

Speaker 142 How was your night?

Speaker 46 Oh my god, it was so good. Got into so much trouble.
It was awesome.

Speaker 80 I missed you a lot.

Speaker 142 I missed you too.

Speaker 95 And I wish we would have been together because I felt like I was kind of like at an eight-year-old's birthday.

Speaker 95 But listen, I love kids, so, you know.

Speaker 46 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 47 No, we're

Speaker 46 had a lot of experience with kids.

Speaker 46 Yeah, well, maybe we'll have a do-over, maybe after the ceremony. Yeah.
Maybe just you and me. Yeah.
Some grand larceny. Yeah.

Speaker 78 Sounds great.

Speaker 85 Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 103 What's Fern up to right now?

Speaker 143 Oh, that's right. I forgot Fern was here.

Speaker 94 You know what's totally crazy though, is Fern is not technically in the wedding party, but we ran into her at Hot Trot.

Speaker 143 Yeah, I was just there.

Speaker 90 I was just there.

Speaker 143 Yeah, I have one of those subscription cards.

Speaker 20 Oh, Jesus.

Speaker 143 And I've had like five of them, and I just stamp right through them.

Speaker 73 Ten left.

Speaker 86 Isn't it great there?

Speaker 143 Big fan of Chadwick.

Speaker 50 Does this mean the rest of your

Speaker 4 party are with you here in town for the wedding?

Speaker 143 I don't know.

Speaker 143 I just, I wanted to have like a night on the town on my own.

Speaker 143 You know?

Speaker 94 I did invite them though. They hopefully they will come.

Speaker 17 Eskick.

Speaker 28 I think they will.

Speaker 28 Meet Pockabee.

Speaker 108 I look forward to it.

Speaker 104 You have said so much about this strange gnarled man.

Speaker 11 He's so cool.

Speaker 112 Pretty cool.

Speaker 20 Is he?

Speaker 94 He has his moments.

Speaker 143 He can turn into a wolf.

Speaker 106 Interesting.

Speaker 11 Noted.

Speaker 94 Canon Essex Furry.

Speaker 65 Walked into that one. Laura Bailey, you stop.

Speaker 86 You stop.

Speaker 144 It's her wedding day. She can do whatever she wants.

Speaker 36 The nearby doors open as Marion re-enters the chambers.

Speaker 33 And I'm like, all right, I need my daughter's wedding to be perfect.

Speaker 109 We have to have the chocolate fountain installed on the far side there.

Speaker 33 Pumat is going to bring it in the next hour or so.

Speaker 108 It has been thoroughly enchanted.

Speaker 91 My beautiful sapphire!

Speaker 123 Runs up and takes you in her arms and just holds you tightly and picks you up.

Speaker 5 I cannot believe the days are coming. You are

Speaker 20 getting married today. Today?

Speaker 90 To that guy?

Speaker 77 Ruby, it is a pleasure as always to see you. You look radiant.

Speaker 60 Oh, I know.

Speaker 94 Oh, I guess I dropped invisibility.

Speaker 94 I'm not invisible anymore.

Speaker 143 I'm so sorry.

Speaker 11 This is your mother?

Speaker 94 Oh, yes.

Speaker 49 Thorn,

Speaker 94 this is my mother.

Speaker 94 Marion Lavore.

Speaker 86 My god.

Speaker 20 My gods.

Speaker 47 You are amazing.

Speaker 145 Do you have perhaps a background in dancing at all?

Speaker 143 Yes, I used to be a professional dancer.

Speaker 68 If I could get your contact information, dear, I would love to get you in contact with our talent agent.

Speaker 86 Oh, absolutely.

Speaker 146 Oh, yes.

Speaker 90 Oh, this is the greatest thing that's ever happened. But Form I'm here, that would be amazing.

Speaker 22 Oh, my God.

Speaker 31 We have to try her out at least. We have to still have auditions.

Speaker 111 Oh, she'll be great.

Speaker 143 I'll be great. I'll be great.
You don't even have to have an audition. Just give me a night and I'll show up and kill it.

Speaker 31 I appreciate her silverware.

Speaker 109 A pleasure to meet you, Fern.

Speaker 143 You as well.

Speaker 66 Dear. Yeah.

Speaker 62 The planner's been a bit

Speaker 7 anxious this morning.

Speaker 20 Why?

Speaker 147 Because people woke up a little later than anticipated, and the events of the day are quickly coming upon us.

Speaker 11 Oh, okay.

Speaker 52 I'm going to handle things here.

Speaker 31 I need to get ready as well. I have my own.

Speaker 93 I know it's your wedding, but your mother has to look her best.

Speaker 94 Always. And

Speaker 60 nothing will run.

Speaker 94 Well, you still do my makeup, though, later, right?

Speaker 71 Of course. Okay.

Speaker 20 I wouldn't dream of missing it, my love. Okay.

Speaker 16 I'll take care of that wedding planner. No problem.
I'm going to go find it.

Speaker 4 Right now, make sure that they're on it.

Speaker 11 I'll see you all.

Speaker 94 Thank you, Caduces.

Speaker 38 At this moment, Devarai goes like

Speaker 148 Hello everybody. Good morning.

Speaker 123 We've had some great conversations, but we finished all that we need to discuss.

Speaker 124 So we have a number of things to deal with today.

Speaker 121 We have the ceremony is going to happen before sunset.

Speaker 124 So eat up, gather your event companions.

Speaker 20 I think we have all of them here. Don't know who you are.

Speaker 123 We have to be a little hasty.

Speaker 121 Things take longer than you anticipated in this sort of plan.

Speaker 148 Ford, you can welcome the guests while they begin to arrive for the actual ceremony, while the bride gets ready.

Speaker 2 Oh, yes, of course.

Speaker 8 I can handle that.

Speaker 123 We have chambers set within the actual lighthouse itself for makeup and getting dressed.

Speaker 121 And then we will have the actual ceremony.

Speaker 121 We've had a number of your guests arrive over the past day or two that have been keeping to themselves, and the majority are going to be arriving this afternoon.

Speaker 121 We will be keeping as many as we can here, as well as sending them off to various inns and establishments that I still have to finish organizing. So

Speaker 20 get ready.

Speaker 94 You're doing great.

Speaker 91 Thanks.

Speaker 38 And she runs out of the chamber.

Speaker 78 Do you do? She is all messed up.

Speaker 51 Yes, very high.

Speaker 22 Very high strong.

Speaker 102 High, strong. Very stressed.

Speaker 81 Do you need any help before we go out and people wrangle?

Speaker 94 No, you look sweaty.

Speaker 90 Are you okay?

Speaker 77 I'm a little dehydrated.

Speaker 94 Do you need some water?

Speaker 77 I can get it. Yes.

Speaker 100 We just had the best night.

Speaker 71 Ford.

Speaker 94 Did you get super wastey pants?

Speaker 46 I had lesser restoration potions. It's fine.
It's fine.

Speaker 85 Oh, okay, okay.

Speaker 86 Spend a lot of money on them.

Speaker 4 The prairie oysters are still setting in. Give him another cup of money.

Speaker 47 Okay, okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 77 We had a great time, though.

Speaker 81 Yeah?

Speaker 40 Wonderful, yes.

Speaker 94 Okay, good. No.

Speaker 97 Insight, check.

Speaker 41 First throw for the night.

Speaker 123 All right, Beth, insight forward.

Speaker 74 Persuasion or deception, based on what you're answering.

Speaker 8 Deception.

Speaker 71 Just a 12.

Speaker 47 13.

Speaker 100 Something's not right about him, but I can't figure out what.

Speaker 86 I had a fucking awesome time last night.

Speaker 98 No trouble at all.

Speaker 77 Thank you very much.

Speaker 115 Insight check.

Speaker 31 24.

Speaker 77 22.

Speaker 113 Essa glides about an inch higher off the ground and gives you a full bottom-to-top glare and goes,

Speaker 61 it seems they did have some fun.

Speaker 61 Thank you.

Speaker 77 Beau and Caleb and I will

Speaker 77 head towards the lighthouse immediately. We will make sure that everyone knows exactly where they're going after I brush my teeth

Speaker 77 and we get cleaned up.

Speaker 46 Okay, take a shower. You smell like a pig sigh.

Speaker 78 I just

Speaker 94 do kind of stink a little bit, but I think you are still great, but definitely take a shower.

Speaker 40 You look beautiful, by the way. Thank you.

Speaker 129 Thank you.

Speaker 86 I love you. I love you.

Speaker 11 I'll see you in a bit. Okay.
Okay.

Speaker 142 What am I going to do?

Speaker 46 What is what does the best man do at a wedding?

Speaker 77 Dude, you help me get dressed and clean and then you make sure all the clothes are there?

Speaker 78 You have the rings?

Speaker 141 Yeah, yeah, yeah, I got him. I got him.

Speaker 46 I got him. I'm not touching your balls, though.
You can watch those.

Speaker 85 I didn't.

Speaker 11 I duh okay, it's fine.

Speaker 105 About this time, you begin to gather your things and head out to your respective responsibilities in preparation for the coming event.

Speaker 103 And you can...

Speaker 44 Already hear in the city, like, people that even aren't invited to this wedding are whispering about it.

Speaker 40 People are asking questions.

Speaker 105 Some folks who'd heard about it and are trying to figure out how best they can get a view of the nuptial.

Speaker 94 They can totally come. Do they want to come?

Speaker 47 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

Speaker 94 I just don't want anybody to feel like they didn't get invited if they want to be there.

Speaker 4 What's the point of having a guest list if you can't tell a few people they can't come?

Speaker 94 Caduces.

Speaker 90 Wow.

Speaker 94 I'm seeing a new side of you through all this.

Speaker 4 It's just if we had a good flowchart, none of this would... We wouldn't have someone running around not knowing what to do with the flower arrangements and those napkins.

Speaker 4 Caduces can low-key be a catty bee.

Speaker 120 You hear the heavy footfalls of an approaching galloping horse and a cloaked shape

Speaker 116 stops up on the side of one of the nearby inns and you see the cloak thrust back and you see a cloud of fluffy white hair as two snow-blind eyes and a leather-wrapped figure.

Speaker 125 Shikasta steps off the horse and turns around, throwing the cloak over the shoulder.

Speaker 11 You made it!

Speaker 8 Hey, baby, how you doing?

Speaker 8 I wasn't gonna miss this for the world.

Speaker 94 I thought you might come to yesterday or something, but I'm so glad to see you now.

Speaker 59 Happy to see you, too, dear.

Speaker 94 Everything's going on inside. You can totally go in, start partying if you want.
Already? There's gonna be a chocolate fountain.

Speaker 57 I've never had a chocolate fountain.

Speaker 20 Princess?

Speaker 44 The hummingbird darts inside the chateau as he kind of enters the interior and goes,

Speaker 20 mmm, that smells lovely.

Speaker 56 And kind of vanishes into the inside.

Speaker 74 You also notice just around the corner,

Speaker 44 there's like a planter where like a small family is in the process of kind of working through a garden and setting things up.

Speaker 56 And there's a familiar voice that's kind of teaching.

Speaker 92 You could hear it's like,

Speaker 152 Well, you see, out there is a funny thing about putting things into the ground.

Speaker 67 You have to give it time to grow.

Speaker 151 And you kind of glance over as you see the

Speaker 119 like sea-weathered, aged eyes and gray hair of the bearded Vanderin as he looks up straight over to you for

Speaker 37 my mind. I never thought I'd see the day.

Speaker 11 Captain, you're looking very well.

Speaker 8 Well, excuse me, son.

Speaker 154 I'll be right back.

Speaker 155 I just gotta.

Speaker 40 I gotta deal with another son.

Speaker 64 Comes up and gives a massive, like, back-clapping hug and pulls you in tight.

Speaker 64 I

Speaker 64 don't know if I'd ever really said it true before, because it's not really a thing that was ever said in my times as much, but

Speaker 32 real proud of you.

Speaker 77 That means more than I can can say.

Speaker 77 I didn't know if you were going to make it, but

Speaker 77 I don't have much in the way of family, and you being here means everything.

Speaker 77 Way too segregated.

Speaker 26 She is absolutely beaming.

Speaker 3 I don't think I've ever seen her otherwise.

Speaker 114 Fair point.

Speaker 8 But I'm excited.

Speaker 58 I'm just hoping I don't rot the rest of my teeth out with some of these sweets I've been seeing on the outskirts.

Speaker 8 But But uh

Speaker 8 you're getting things ready.

Speaker 106 I'll see you at the ceremony. Let me go ahead and help Timothy here learn how to properly set a guard.

Speaker 77 One thing, and I reach in my pockets and I take out a little metal pin that I've I've pressed.

Speaker 84 It's got a little a seal with an anchor and the wreath of the wild mother around it.

Speaker 77 And it's something that I'm giving to the

Speaker 77 best man and Caleb on my side. And I want you to have this.

Speaker 11 Please wear it.

Speaker 45 He opens up his heavily calloused and scarred palm and kind of accepts it before his fingers close around it.

Speaker 56 His like meaty hand.

Speaker 44 And so small and delicate, but the symbol in that grip, he holds it so tight.

Speaker 75 He kind of just looks down at it.

Speaker 32 Thank you.

Speaker 8 Thank you for being there when it mattered.

Speaker 153 Thank you for learning from my mistakes.

Speaker 8 Well said,

Speaker 20 friends.

Speaker 44 Turns back to the garden and sits down with the boy and says, Now you see, you've got to till the land.

Speaker 26 If you don't turn over the dirt, it's not going to get the nutrients, do it.

Speaker 36 Little boy should read it.

Speaker 77 He's going to be doing that for the next few hours, I think.

Speaker 77 Anyone that will listen.

Speaker 9 Amazon has everything for everyone on your list. Like your mom, who treats every bouquet like it's headed straight to the Smithsonian.

Speaker 9 She'll point to dried stems and say, those are from your sister's graduation. Like she's giving a museum tour of decomposed love.

Speaker 78 Get her a floral Lego set.

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Speaker 13 Here's a quick podcast for all you true crime fans.

Speaker 14 The case of the missing Reese's.

Speaker 15 It was me. At the store with my mouth.

Speaker 16 Motive?

Speaker 13 Um, they're Reese's. What was I going to do?

Speaker 18 Stop myself?

Speaker 15 Tune in next time to see if I do it again.

Speaker 19 Spoiler, I will.

Speaker 79 Wow, that had everything.

Speaker 19 Reese's, suspense, Reese's.

Speaker 134 AI agents are everywhere, automating tasks and making decisions at machine speed. But agents make mistakes.

Speaker 128 Just one rogue agent can do big damage before you even notice.

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Speaker 133 That's r-u-b-r-i-k.com.

Speaker 55 Eventually, you all begin to head southward through the city.

Speaker 113 Past the beautiful arches themselves now nearly completed in their decoration and the colors and themes of the nuptials this later afternoon.

Speaker 45 Other folks can't help but glance out now that word has got around over the recent weeks of who is getting married and the type of people that are starting to show up from around the world here to be a part of it.

Speaker 116 So you can see like even the little,

Speaker 110 you know,

Speaker 106 like street gutter kids who, you know, love to go out there and play in the dirt when their parents aren't looking are kind of leaping up to the side and watching you with wide eyes as you walk by.

Speaker 44 Little girl kind of sneezes and looks at you, afraid that she may have caught your attention, catches your glance,

Speaker 106 and then darts off down the way.

Speaker 44 You can hear the gulls beginning to

Speaker 75 through the air as the smell of the sea and the kind of salty, briny wind begins to blow past.

Speaker 103 The

Speaker 119 looming, towering shape of the lighthouse of Nicodranus guides guides you all to the southern cliffside of the city.

Speaker 114 There you see the massive stone-sculpted shape of the wild mother looking out to the ocean, her robes flowing around her base, the beautiful symbol of

Speaker 44 land and sea and what it means to feel protected.

Speaker 155 Even without her direct influence on Xandria at this moment,

Speaker 155 the history there has weight.

Speaker 40 And indeed, the surroundings are already massively bustling.

Speaker 65 There are no less than five, maybe six long tables that have all manner of three, four tiered plates that are yet waiting to receive their bounty of various baked goods, cookies, and treats.

Speaker 3 You can see

Speaker 34 beautiful white, pink,

Speaker 3 peach, and cream-colored flowers and rose bushes have been set in, brought to this location and planted around the base of the towering lighthouse.

Speaker 40 You can see trees that didn't exist before and don't normally grow in this part of the land, this part of the world,

Speaker 53 are now fully present, like they've always been here, with blooms of beautiful white and pink leaves.

Speaker 69 You see

Speaker 43 not far off the side

Speaker 40 a woman kind of wiping her brow of sweat, having finished growing one of these trees rapidly through magical means, her red hair and large antlers curling upward.

Speaker 119 Takes a small cloth and wipes her brow as another woman with similar dark hair walks up and pats her on the shoulder and says, Why don't you take a rest, dear?

Speaker 118 You've been working all morning.

Speaker 46 No, you don't understand. These wedding trees have to be perfect.

Speaker 46 Say, they don't even exist. I just made them up.
I don't even know what a wedding tree is, but I made a pink tree.

Speaker 5 That's a true act of creation, dear, and that's incredible.

Speaker 21 I know.

Speaker 78 I know.

Speaker 115 It might upset the ecology of the coastline.

Speaker 46 Don't do this to me right now.

Speaker 11 Look. Okay.

Speaker 46 I'll get rid of them afterwards, okay? I'm not trying to create an invasive species or anything.

Speaker 11 It'll be fine.

Speaker 55 I understand, but as your mother, it's important to me to let you know

Speaker 122 just to

Speaker 44 be aware of the responsibility of the impact you have around you.

Speaker 11 Okay, Mom.

Speaker 46 Thanks.

Speaker 46 Look, it's just, you know,

Speaker 46 Mighty Nine, they did a lot. They've saved the world not once, but like, kind of twice.
And,

Speaker 46 you know, they've earned this.

Speaker 132 Well,

Speaker 66 they brought us back together, so I owe them everything as well.

Speaker 83 Yeah.

Speaker 46 This has to be special.

Speaker 119 And it's at that moment over your shoulder you see Jester and Ford and the wedding parties arriving.

Speaker 46 Oh my gosh. Do you like them? I tried, I got the color swatches from your wedding planner.

Speaker 90 Yeah, yeah, they're amazing.

Speaker 46 She seems like a very stressed woman.

Speaker 46 But I tried to really like capture, you know, the light pink and the salmon, Eva. But you never want to go too salmon.
Salmon can kind of turn off.

Speaker 94 No, you know. Yeah, I totally get it.
It's the perfect shade of pink. pink these trees are beautiful i hope they stay here forever okay

Speaker 94 all right well this is very important do the trees stay here forever we'll we'll talk about it afterwards i can put them in a pot they want to have a wedding present keyleth and then every time we come down to the beach people will remember this wedding

Speaker 46 Where's to tell Deborah, tell tell the wedding planner to get pots, big pots.

Speaker 46 That'd be good.

Speaker 96 It'll be great. I love you.
Thank you. I love you.

Speaker 46 You look beautiful.

Speaker 11 You're not even like fully in a game. I'm not even dressed.

Speaker 46 Well, you have the glow of a woman in love.

Speaker 47 I am.

Speaker 91 Good.

Speaker 94 I am. You do too.

Speaker 48 Thank you.

Speaker 46 What else can I do? Yo, wait. Oh, wait, don't don't touch the dahlias.
Get away from the dahlia. I go over and like shoe off some kids.

Speaker 86 Everybody's doing so good.

Speaker 103 Around this time, Deferon shows up again.

Speaker 70 Good, you've all arrived. Wonderful.

Speaker 122 I'll show you to your very arrangements to your dressing chambers that we've set within the lighthouse where you can prepare yourselves.

Speaker 3 Four inch pulls of pocket watch.

Speaker 71 Oh, goodness.

Speaker 11 We need to get you dressed.

Speaker 94 I take the robe of my

Speaker 94 sleeve of my robe and I start dabbing the forehead.

Speaker 105 Withdraws a bit.

Speaker 20 Oh,

Speaker 20 Just calm down.

Speaker 72 Everything's going to be fine.

Speaker 92 Kind of just like looks at you for a minute, kind of sighs.

Speaker 93 You're right. You're absolutely right.

Speaker 94 Just hey, don't fuck it up, okay?

Speaker 73 That's my girl.

Speaker 44 We have to get the pillars installed.

Speaker 125 And turns and starts calling over some of the the nearby breakers.

Speaker 105 You see Blue is off to the side and is currently helping a few other figures.

Speaker 3 Like they're pulling these massive stone pillars over.

Speaker 31 They're rolling them and then setting them up

Speaker 119 to kind of frame a path that leads towards the cliffside.

Speaker 44 And what you do notice at a quick glance from this distance is where the trees were set up beyond that. There is a platform, a dais with stairs that lead up.

Speaker 92 Stone cobbled and ivy overgrown.

Speaker 44 And there, seemingly grown out of the stone itself, a beautiful arch of twisting vines and flowers that resembles the Traveler's Gateway.

Speaker 105 Two chandeliers are set to the sides of it, candles not yet set or lit.

Speaker 33 And you can see streamers being set up.

Speaker 105 The pillars are being locked from side to side.

Speaker 39 Beautiful bushes. Oh my gosh!

Speaker 22 Cool.

Speaker 75 You can already see, in just the short time you've been, this is going to be

Speaker 92 an event to remember.

Speaker 83 What?

Speaker 79 What?

Speaker 147 Do we have to get dressed? Is it time?

Speaker 94 Oh, I don't know.

Speaker 111 Caduces. Do we have to get dressed?

Speaker 4 You should have been dressed five minutes ago. Really, we're all running behind.

Speaker 100 Okay, I'll cast. You have to ask.

Speaker 97 I'll cast haste on Jester.

Speaker 72 Oh!

Speaker 72 Let's go, let's go, let's go.

Speaker 48 Good technique.

Speaker 94 I am so excited right now. Let's go.

Speaker 143 Um, you all go get ready, okay? Cause I know I'm not in the party, but I'm gonna go help your mom get undressed.

Speaker 94 You want to be in the party?

Speaker 94 Oh,

Speaker 94 yeah.

Speaker 94 No, it's okay.

Speaker 94 Sorry.

Speaker 143 And I'll wait for everybody to get here, but Jester, I love you so much.

Speaker 94 Love you, Farm. Thank you so much for coming out with us last night.
Thank you so much. I'm so glad you're here.

Speaker 71 Me too.

Speaker 143 Bye, everybody.

Speaker 18 Hey, why am I missing like my money pouch?

Speaker 78 I must have lost it last night.

Speaker 86 You went hard.

Speaker 4 Caleb nudges Ford quietly and says, hey, do you see that dark speck out on the water about a half a mile that way?

Speaker 50 I do, yes. Why?

Speaker 4 That's a naked statue of you with your doodle out. Try not to look at it when you're saying your vow.

Speaker 46 It's got a tusk-tooth tattoo in its ass. It's awesome.

Speaker 8 It doesn't go away after like an hour?

Speaker 4 Not today.

Speaker 4 Wait.

Speaker 46 Should we all get matching Tusk Tooth tattoos over this?

Speaker 142 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 46 That could be awesome.

Speaker 46 I bet Chester would be into it.

Speaker 46 I'm just saying it could be great.

Speaker 94 Um, did I hear tattoos? Yeah, yeah. You know, here's the thing.
For a wedding present, I haven't given you guys anything yet. I was thinking I could give everyone tattoos.

Speaker 94 You know, because I've been wanting to tattoo all of you guys over and over and over again.

Speaker 8 I'm going to be honest.

Speaker 59 I've always been very curious about this tattoo thing.

Speaker 66 Maybe it, I don't know, gives me more of a bad boy edge.

Speaker 94 Yeah, I could definitely give you something.

Speaker 46 I look at Caleb.

Speaker 78 What have you done to him?

Speaker 4 Turned him out.

Speaker 4 Is this the gift-giving part of the day? Have we reached that point?

Speaker 47 I don't know.

Speaker 94 Kadusis, is this the gift-giving part of the day yet?

Speaker 4 At this point, I would just assume that the 25 minutes that we put aside for it later on after the cake is gone now.

Speaker 4 So, might as well get to it.

Speaker 94 Should we get dressed first?

Speaker 11 I don't know.

Speaker 84 Caleb eyeballs Essek really quick.

Speaker 88 Do you have it, dear?

Speaker 138 Right. Yours?

Speaker 20 Okay.

Speaker 4 I'm just going to do this now.

Speaker 110 Huh?

Speaker 4 This is something that, and Caleb drags Veth to the side. That

Speaker 4 Essek and I and Veth have been.

Speaker 11 Bo helped to. Oh, sorry.

Speaker 47 But we have been working.

Speaker 46 I picked out the box and I told Caleb it was a great idea.

Speaker 4 We have been working on this for 382 days,

Speaker 4 about an hour a day.

Speaker 4 I did the designs, I shaped them myself, I picked the gems for them, and

Speaker 4 I'd just like to give these to you before the day gets too crazy.

Speaker 94 I've been working on this since before we were even engaged.

Speaker 18 I guess that math, yeah.

Speaker 102 Yeah, he has foresight.

Speaker 4 Don't I, though?

Speaker 4 At any rate, and Essek pulls out of his robes a small silver and platinum amulet, a medallion, that looks like a very stylized, thin

Speaker 4 spin on the traveler gate symbol. And Caleb pulls out of his clothes what looks like same material,

Speaker 4 very pale platinum and silver gems of an anchor encrusted in a floral design.

Speaker 4 And Caleb walks up to Ford, and Essek approaches you, Jester, and we start to place these two amulets over your neck.

Speaker 159 These are,

Speaker 4 well, I've called them the hidden haven amulets, and we have made them for you together, and they will keep you safe.

Speaker 46 I tied the the bows on the strings.

Speaker 46 I've been real busy at work.

Speaker 19 Beauregard was crucial.

Speaker 18 I have my PC, you have yours.

Speaker 4 So they will keep you safer, but also they are going to give you a place to celebrate tonight after the ceremony and every night. And if you

Speaker 4 join the two amulets together, if the anchor is placed within the arch, it completes

Speaker 4 an arcane script that wraps around the entire combination. And

Speaker 4 if you merely say the words and they have to be together and you have to be holding it,

Speaker 4 if you say,

Speaker 4 Mein Herz, Meinheim, which means my heart, my home, but I thought it would be funnier if I made you speak in Zemyung,

Speaker 4 and you will call into being a doorway that will lead you into your own fraction of a tower.

Speaker 77 A honeymoon suite.

Speaker 4 A honeymoon suite.

Speaker 4 To be used once a day, and one of you has to be holding it, and however you imagine it to be,

Speaker 4 so it would be.

Speaker 78 Caleb, this is

Speaker 11 incredible. Thank you, Essie.

Speaker 8 Only from minds of you and you.

Speaker 128 Three wizards. Three wizards.

Speaker 94 You did this too, Ven?

Speaker 11 And also, Beau.

Speaker 102 We've been enchanting for a long time.

Speaker 100 Yeah, it's pretty hard work, but every once in a while, Caleb would stop time to give us an

Speaker 25 extra day or two. There was a quota every day.

Speaker 77 I think the bows are my favorite part.

Speaker 146 Send my name.

Speaker 111 And the room is always full of cats, Ford.

Speaker 71 They're full of what?

Speaker 111 It's always full of cats.

Speaker 4 That is no, but, not yes, and no, but. There are no cats in there.

Speaker 72 There are no. It's made for you.

Speaker 77 Thank you. This is incredible.

Speaker 94 That is so thoughtful. I can't wait the bone inside of it.

Speaker 18 Jester!

Speaker 71 What?

Speaker 99 Speaking of, Jester, just curious.

Speaker 98 Do you know what to do in that department?

Speaker 78 Okay.

Speaker 146 I mean, as your matron of honor, I'm supposed to prepare you for this display tonight.

Speaker 98 And if you haven't done it yet,

Speaker 98 I could show you some techniques or

Speaker 98 just

Speaker 98 give you some points. That's sort of why we went to the place last night.

Speaker 144 I wanted you to get a...

Speaker 94 I saw you doing a lot of moves.

Speaker 28 Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 86 You didn't know I was learning them.

Speaker 77 Okay.

Speaker 4 To be fair, she has been keeping it fresh for a very long time.

Speaker 8 That's true.

Speaker 94 You know what, Vet, I will always take advice from you if you want to give it.

Speaker 11 But for the

Speaker 98 I don't understand what that means.

Speaker 160 We've probably done it before, before.

Speaker 90 But you're not married yet.

Speaker 72 Huh?

Speaker 98 But you're not married yet.

Speaker 85 We've lived together and

Speaker 78 nights at sea, the motion of the ocean.

Speaker 72 Oh my god, I've kind of taken one fucking minute of this.

Speaker 161 Yeah, it's...

Speaker 4 That's maritime law. Yeah.

Speaker 77 Sometimes all you have to do is ride.

Speaker 85 That's right.

Speaker 94 And the waves.

Speaker 72 They'll just take you.

Speaker 94 It's super fun.

Speaker 4 You did this. Right now, you're the one who made them talk about it.

Speaker 77 But no, please, all the advice you can spare.

Speaker 102 I'm sure I know things that you don't.

Speaker 77 I'm sure that's true.

Speaker 162 Well, I'm proud of you for being a little fixing.

Speaker 94 I can't believe she thought I hadn't done it yet.

Speaker 27 Oh, where am I supposed to be putting this chocolate fountain?

Speaker 76 As around the corner, you see Pumat Sol and two other Pumats, all dressed in long, kind of light green and silver robes, kind of just formal attire, all carrying a large stone, multi-tiered fountain.

Speaker 27 Where are you supposed to put this?

Speaker 94 I'm not sure, but probably right near the beach.

Speaker 27 That's a hundred-foot cliff.

Speaker 72 Oh.

Speaker 38 It goes it goes right beside the the the the first dessert table right in between here.

Speaker 16 Let me help let me help you.

Speaker 30 All right.

Speaker 89 No, thank you very much Cadus tries to find a place to help to hold but it's just getting in the way of everything.

Speaker 30 All right, no, it's over in this direction.

Speaker 27 All right, you pull mat pumat carry it over there.

Speaker 30 No worries.

Speaker 37 We got it.

Speaker 41 Lift it up. All right Pumat, you got it?

Speaker 37 Yeah, don't worry, I got it. All right, ready?

Speaker 27 I'm three. One, two, three, three, three.

Speaker 8 We're all going.

Speaker 74 They all kind of lift and set it over to the side. Like, are we bringing this to the reception too later?

Speaker 15 Did no one read the plan?

Speaker 94 I think, yes, it's supposed to be at the reception, actually, from the get-go. I don't know if it was supposed to be here, but you can start it here and then move it.
You could, you know what?

Speaker 94 If you want to, you could put it over on the beach, and that way we can get a little

Speaker 94 strawberry action before we go up to the altar.

Speaker 4 Chocolate fondue does not typically do well with high tide.

Speaker 95 Or it sounds a little weird with sand as well.

Speaker 95 You know?

Speaker 94 Leave it here and then we can take it to reception after.

Speaker 70 Are you really ignoring the hundred-foot cliff part?

Speaker 46 That was a big deal.

Speaker 87 Everything else doesn't matter.

Speaker 78 You gotta go down a hundred feet.

Speaker 102 Are you afraid of falling off a cliff?

Speaker 102 Wow.

Speaker 27 Here, tell you what, we'll just go ahead and take it back to the chateau.

Speaker 37 But uh hey

Speaker 27 congrats you two

Speaker 89 You know

Speaker 27 first day I saw you both I looked over and was like you could just tell the puppy love ain't that right Boomat oh, yeah, you could tell from the way they looked at each other.

Speaker 27 They were just destined to be together.

Speaker 77 That's so strange. It seems like we were about to die the first time we were in his shop.
Yeah

Speaker 76 Well there's that too, but you know sometimes you need to be reminded of your mortality to really figure out who's important to you.

Speaker 27 Forges the best relationships, am I right?

Speaker 94 You're coming to the wedding, right? Of course. Okay, and you are NUR?

Speaker 41 Oh, yeah. We're supposed to be here, right?

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 8 No, that's the whole point.

Speaker 76 Other Pumat's still holding the shop for us while we're out here.

Speaker 8 A lot of stuff on back order.

Speaker 30 Wait, wait, three seats?

Speaker 4 Do we need...

Speaker 11 You need three seats.

Speaker 8 If that's a problem, some of us can stand.

Speaker 30 No, no, no.

Speaker 4 I'll figure it out.

Speaker 114 Nope, we're figuring out.

Speaker 3 You seem really put off by this, Godoo.

Speaker 30 No, no.

Speaker 110 I don't mean to cause a problem.

Speaker 4 This was... no, this was not you.
This was not you.

Speaker 4 You're fine.

Speaker 4 Let's go over the math together.

Speaker 27 Respectfully, we'll go ahead and take this back to the chateau.

Speaker 115 He watches Pumap suddenly hulks out, his body swelling with magical power so he can lift the fountain all by himself on one shoulder and goes, you do take a break, see if they need any help.

Speaker 92 He just kind of lumbers back towards the rest of the interior of Nicodronus.

Speaker 94 Did that turn you on, Beth?

Speaker 10 I mean,

Speaker 102 minutes are?

Speaker 98 I have seen a ton of them in the last 44 hours, but yes, it did.

Speaker 77 We really shouldn't be surprised that she wants to pass on her secrets. I mean, have you seen Yazza? He walks with a limp now.

Speaker 40 She is a machine.

Speaker 4 Limp and a smile.

Speaker 54 As you all head into your respective chambers, outfitted in the inside of the Wild Mother's Lighthouse, the beautiful interior has an enchanted music box that sets continuous violin music abound that kind of gives this jovial, event-filled, beautiful sound as you all begin to gather your clothing, gather your accessories, gather your accoutrements, and get the rest of your troop prepared for the event.

Speaker 67 As you all separate into your bride and groom elements of this lighthouse, you begin to hear outside the sound of the crowd begin to grow.

Speaker 8 You take glances out the windows at parts of the lighthouse and looking down you can see a number of figures kind of talking in the corner.

Speaker 33 You see a half-scaled face in a beautiful dark green dress.

Speaker 35 This Kaliana is having a conversation with Orly who is dressed in this

Speaker 33 custom massive jacket put over his shell.

Speaker 6 Holes cut in the back for his massive pipes that kind of push out the side with little bows on them.

Speaker 43 He's got a formal eye patch on that has a little tusk tooth embroidered into it.

Speaker 31 Yes.

Speaker 55 I'm talking on one end.

Speaker 119 You can see down Yusa and Keg are currently having a conversation while they're pulling strawberries from what looks like a platter of creamed fruit.

Speaker 29 You can see now they're starting to put out all manner of cream puffs.

Speaker 156 You can see there's beautiful little treat sandwiches and chocolate rolls and doughnuts.

Speaker 29 So many doughnuts, varieties many had not seen from all around Axandria, imported and brought beyond.

Speaker 105 You glance over and you can see Keleth and Vilia have finished up with the final tree that is now blooming and blossoming.

Speaker 44 This is a beautiful sight, and everyone has pulled together to make this a memorable event.

Speaker 3 You see Yeza has sat down and is having a conversation with Neela, who is there with her family.

Speaker 109 Even just a glance off to the side, you can see Allura and Kima have just arrived, and they rush up to give Keelith and Villia

Speaker 163 a big hug.

Speaker 44 There's a knock at your

Speaker 45 door gesture as you're in the middle of getting dressed.

Speaker 94 Hello, come in!

Speaker 94 Unless you're four!

Speaker 71 Unless you're four, don't come in.

Speaker 94 Don't come in. Don't come in.
Well, answer at the door for you.

Speaker 97 Oh, sorry, sorry. Yes, yes, yes.

Speaker 78 Beth will go over and and open the door. Who is it?

Speaker 92 You open the door and you see a tricorn figure in a long dark coat, kind of a scarf around the neck.

Speaker 92 But you see a glint of a smile across a dark blue face and a glimmer of sweat perpetually dripping from his brow.

Speaker 58 Hi, I'm here to see my daughter, if that's all.

Speaker 8 Oh my god!

Speaker 97 Oh,

Speaker 97 Jester, you have a visitor, but before you go in there, um,

Speaker 162 here, I'll give him a towel.

Speaker 101 You might just want to...

Speaker 97 Might just want to clean up first.

Speaker 59 It's good to see you, too.

Speaker 40 And he takes the towel, dabbles his brow, and puts it into your hand.

Speaker 32 Thank you, kindly.

Speaker 44 And steps in.

Speaker 155 Hi!

Speaker 31 Jester, my dear, you look radiant, even

Speaker 94 unfinished. Yeah, I'm gonna.
It's gonna be so much more pretty once everything is on.

Speaker 91 I'm sure.

Speaker 57 Um,

Speaker 154 I have to keep a low profile for

Speaker 20 reasons, but

Speaker 75 I just want you to know I'm going to be here.

Speaker 94 You're go- you're coming?

Speaker 59 I wouldn't miss it for the world.

Speaker 94 Mama's going to be so happy.

Speaker 8 I hope so.

Speaker 94 She- Oh my gosh, her dress?

Speaker 129 Her dress.

Speaker 94 You know, I mean, she always looks good, but her dress is beautiful today.

Speaker 44 I'm very excited to be present.

Speaker 44 Um.

Speaker 94 Do you have a present for me?

Speaker 31 My presence is a present.

Speaker 86 Oh, yeah.

Speaker 39 But

Speaker 75 if indeed it is material wealth you require.

Speaker 81 I mean I don't requ require it.

Speaker 125 How soon is the event this afternoon?

Speaker 94 Two hours? Yeah, just before sunset.

Speaker 106 Let me see what strings I can pull.

Speaker 32 I still have a few contacts that haven't gone completely underground here at Nicodronus.

Speaker 56 Come somebody takes your hand.

Speaker 155 As complicated as life has been and continues to be in some regards, I just want to say that I've watched you grow these recent years and while I'm still

Speaker 40 sad that I've missed so much of who you were and who you've become,

Speaker 59 to have the opportunity now to see who

Speaker 59 who you will ever continue to blossom into is a gift to us all.

Speaker 91 And

Speaker 31 I hope to

Speaker 8 one day

Speaker 59 make you as proud as you make me.

Speaker 94 I give him a hug.

Speaker 94 I'm so, so grateful that I found you.

Speaker 94 And

Speaker 94 I can't wait to see what adventures we find together.

Speaker 66 Hopefully, without quite a

Speaker 56 as much of a rap sheet on on yours.

Speaker 11 Oh, yeah, I'll be good.

Speaker 52 But, you know,

Speaker 40 I'm turning many leaves and have been for some time, and a few...

Speaker 103 a few amends to still make.

Speaker 154 Maybe in time.

Speaker 64 Maybe in time I'll be able to show my face proudly.

Speaker 153 But for now, shh. Shh.

Speaker 71 So you're not gonna walk her down the aisle?

Speaker 64 I...

Speaker 153 I assumed your mother would be the one to have the honor.

Speaker 94 Yeah, well, I know you have to keep.

Speaker 141 Secret.

Speaker 94 Plus, Mama raised me, really, even though you're great and all.

Speaker 110 That it's

Speaker 57 not untrue.

Speaker 20 Yes, uh.

Speaker 94 But hey, maybe if I renew my vows, you can do it the second time, right? If you're gonna be around more.

Speaker 19 Oh, boy.

Speaker 19 Is there a third wedding?

Speaker 11 Oh, come on.

Speaker 54 I look forward to that, whether it be to the same or some other lucky gentleman.

Speaker 24 But the next celebration,

Speaker 139 I'll work to be there.

Speaker 94 Alright, I'll see you soon.

Speaker 112 Very well.

Speaker 71 You give me my problem.

Speaker 44 I'm on it. And he darts out into the hallway, his face kind of shimmering past, and you see the coloration of his skin kind of go instead to a ruddier pinkish color.

Speaker 155 And he kind of disappears down the stairs and out into the rest of the celebratory grounds.

Speaker 94 I can't believe he showed up. He could be in so much trouble.

Speaker 70 I can't believe that both your parents are that hot.

Speaker 94 I know, right?

Speaker 94 How do you think I got so attractive?

Speaker 4 Honestly, I assumed it was a spell that just never dropped.

Speaker 101 Wow.

Speaker 101 Speaking of, we need to get you dressed.

Speaker 94 Yeah, yeah, yeah. But you all got your outfits right.
I picked them out especially for you guys.

Speaker 96 Yes.

Speaker 95 Yes, it's so comfortable.

Speaker 111 Yes, it's

Speaker 11 so simple and plain. Yeah.

Speaker 101 I love it. I do.
I really do.

Speaker 100 You really thought of everything. Yeah.

Speaker 146 I did.

Speaker 94 Hey, you guys.

Speaker 96 I haven't written my vows yet.

Speaker 96 That's a big deal. I know.

Speaker 96 Can you.

Speaker 96 Ah! I know.

Speaker 4 Cadus has been quietly humming in the corner, and you just hear that mm-hmm.

Speaker 96 What rhymes with Ford?

Speaker 90 Do they have to rhyme? I don't know. Ford.

Speaker 94 No, I can't say that.

Speaker 77 Sword.

Speaker 83 Sword.

Speaker 23 Sword? Ford.

Speaker 94 I'll figure out something.

Speaker 41 Fjord.

Speaker 33 Meanwhile, on the other side of the lighthouse, the groomsmen

Speaker 54 are finishing getting their preparations completed.

Speaker 18 pants are so tight.

Speaker 8 Riding up my butt.

Speaker 46 You'll be fine. Just don't bend over or or squat down, or lean forward, or really do anything.
Just don't move, or you'll split it down your ass.

Speaker 84 Yeah, besides, it's really working for you.

Speaker 46 He's right.

Speaker 46 Bo goes over and she pulls like a hot iron out of the fire and is kind of like pressing his coat a little bit.

Speaker 77 You never know.

Speaker 20 In the

Speaker 156 tension of that moment, you hear a faint scratching on wood

Speaker 155 from outside of the door.

Speaker 77 Divine sense

Speaker 44 which allows you to pick up Bay Fiend or undead.

Speaker 59 You catch up a faint Fae signature

Speaker 68 Callis Farn, Star Racer,

Speaker 52 comes out.

Speaker 21 Bo take the hard corner.

Speaker 46 But just open over, don't bend over.

Speaker 4 Fire in my hand.

Speaker 78 I go over to the door.

Speaker 8 Who is it?

Speaker 54 An unexpected force slams into your chest as you get pushed back about four feet and a slobbering tongue begins to rake itself across your face as Nugget, the blink dog, has pounced you onto the ground.

Speaker 71 And it's just... No, no, no, Nugget!

Speaker 7 Your well-coffed hair is now torn akimbo.

Speaker 71 The wrong room! She's not!

Speaker 79 It hits! Get off of me!

Speaker 46 I don't think it's the wrong room. I think he meant for for this.
Ah!

Speaker 80 Hey, buddy.

Speaker 8 Ligamos is Gritchy.

Speaker 23 Oh, he goes to the bottom.

Speaker 77 Very glad to see you two, Nugget.

Speaker 98 Don't we have like a treat, something we could give him?

Speaker 46 Oh, yeah, pull out some pocket bacon.

Speaker 46 Take it, and I just kind of like

Speaker 46 get his attention and then kind of throw it out of the room.

Speaker 80 Get him to go.

Speaker 3 He just disappears from sight.

Speaker 46 Ah, shit.

Speaker 77 I'm sure he's fine. How do I look?

Speaker 46 Pretty good. I kind of dab dab off some of the slobber and then I come and I take his captain's coat

Speaker 46 and drape it over his shoulders. Get him in the coat.

Speaker 77 It just hit. It just hit.

Speaker 50 It just hit.

Speaker 77 This is good, right? This is a good thing.

Speaker 77 I mean, your jester deserves the best, and I can.

Speaker 46 If you weren't nervous, I would be concerned.

Speaker 11 That's fair.

Speaker 11 All right.

Speaker 4 Jester does deserve the best.

Speaker 4 And you are the best for Jester.

Speaker 4 You're going to do just fine.

Speaker 11 Thank you.

Speaker 48 DM, how far are we from the ceremony timeline?

Speaker 154 I was just about to tell you, as you're having this conversation, you're glancing past one of the glass windows that overlooks the cliffside on the kind of western edge out of town.

Speaker 43 The beautiful, clear blue sky with like wisps of white cloud kind of trailing through like ethereal ribbons

Speaker 67 begin to turn ever so faintly towards the beginnings of sunset.

Speaker 44 Within the next 30 minutes or so, everyone's going to be seated and the ceremony will begin.

Speaker 4 Now,

Speaker 4 I know that you are not going to fuck up your vows.

Speaker 50 However, I pull out a pearl and place it against his forehead.

Speaker 4 Don't fuck up your vows, and I cast fortune's favor on board.

Speaker 64 Fair.

Speaker 77 Oh, thank you for that.

Speaker 77 I wrote them down.

Speaker 84 Yeah, I'll see how it goes.

Speaker 42 Okay.

Speaker 105 The smell of the ocean breeze grows stronger as the rest of the day begins to meet the golden hour.

Speaker 44 The long benches that splinter out from the central archway begin to fill with guests and beyond

Speaker 43 as clusters of standing folk from all parts of your lives and lives beyond your lives have all begun to excitedly prepare for these nuptials.

Speaker 127 You glance out and you can see Reenie has filled a plate with all manner of doughnuts and goes and sits next to

Speaker 8 who has

Speaker 31 dressed up in what looks to probably be a stolen, somewhat larger-than-their-size coat that they're kind of folding over their top.

Speaker 119 And that both of them are kind of picking apart from the plate as they're giggling to each other, excited for the celebration to come.

Speaker 67 Both of you separately kind of glance out with your respective wedding parties and take in the sheer volume of people who have touched your lives and whose lives you've touched.

Speaker 46 Jester really did invite all of Xandria, didn't she?

Speaker 4 Three campaigns worth.

Speaker 112 Yeah.

Speaker 129 Damn.

Speaker 92 It's around this time that Defirad bursts into your chamber and goes.

Speaker 148 We're about to begin shortly.

Speaker 121 About 15 minutes.

Speaker 41 Are you ready?

Speaker 46 Okay, calm the fuck down, bro. It's a wedding.
We're not fighting a dragon, all right? Are we ready?

Speaker 77 Are we ready? Are you sure?

Speaker 38 Are we ready? Are we ready?

Speaker 10 Yeah, yeah, yeah, we're ready. You ready?

Speaker 87 You're ready. We're ready.
Ready?

Speaker 78 Ready?

Speaker 77 Are you?

Speaker 8 Always.

Speaker 11 Ugh.

Speaker 77 Where'd you find this one? I don't know, just to hire him.

Speaker 81 This is a.

Speaker 77 We are ready and waiting for your signal.

Speaker 79 Then

Speaker 61 head downstairs and begin to greet those as they arrive.

Speaker 43 Wait at the outskirts of the

Speaker 20 pathway.

Speaker 36 And when the music begins, your um

Speaker 34 caduce's friend

Speaker 60 will calmly and respectfully guide the ceremony.

Speaker 77 That sounds good. We can do that.
We can do that.

Speaker 46 We'll be down very shortly.

Speaker 66 Very well.

Speaker 106 Darts off.

Speaker 79 Heads over towards the bride's side of the lighthouse.

Speaker 92 Comes in.

Speaker 59 It is about that time.

Speaker 70 How are we looking?

Speaker 8 Are we on time?

Speaker 8 I have not.

Speaker 79 But

Speaker 55 if you are indeed close, I assume he would be present.

Speaker 36 Okay.

Speaker 39 A lot of people

Speaker 8 have

Speaker 60 been

Speaker 40 arriving here in even just the past half an hour.

Speaker 148 So may very well be amongst many of the others.

Speaker 7 I'm still trying to get everybody checked in,

Speaker 5 but I'm certain they will.

Speaker 11 Okay.

Speaker 18 If you're worried, do you want to send him a message?

Speaker 94 Um, yes, I will send him a message. I'm just writing my vows.

Speaker 111 Oh, shoot, that's right, the vows.

Speaker 94 I just want to let Ford know how romantic he is and how sweet he is.

Speaker 99 Just speak from the heart.

Speaker 101 It'll be fine.

Speaker 95 I can send Arty a message.

Speaker 47 Oh, okay.

Speaker 94 Yeah, go for it, Yasha.

Speaker 95 Artie,

Speaker 142 where are you?

Speaker 95 We are waiting here at the wedding of Jester,

Speaker 95 Jester Lavore

Speaker 95 and Ford.

Speaker 142 All right,

Speaker 90 you better get here soon.

Speaker 95 Okay, bye-bye.

Speaker 54 It's about this moment

Speaker 3 that a hand touches your shoulder, Jess.

Speaker 109 It worked!

Speaker 109 And you turn back to see...

Speaker 111 It's never worked!

Speaker 20 In beautiful, light and dark green robes, fitting of an incredible, ancient, terrifying and gorgeous archfey, his billowing mane of red curls.

Speaker 38 His elongated ears, and his brow that will not stop.

Speaker 105 Artagon takes you by the shoulder and spins you on.

Speaker 32 My dear, all you had to do was have a rask.

Speaker 138 She is an incredibly powerful psychic entity.

Speaker 94 I know.

Speaker 43 I'd be careful, honestly.

Speaker 106 I don't know what otherworldly beings you might contact with.

Speaker 156 Too much concentration.

Speaker 8 Dangerous territory, Archie. Wow.

Speaker 95 Okay, I just. I didn't.
I didn't even.

Speaker 142 You showed up immediately.

Speaker 74 Even then, you're giving me a headache.

Speaker 89 You're...

Speaker 86 Okay, sorry.

Speaker 95 This is Jester's Day.

Speaker 60 Not about me.

Speaker 7 Well, we'll talk later because this.

Speaker 40 You can do great many things with this power.

Speaker 88 Oh, boy.

Speaker 93 He looks back at you and winks.

Speaker 52 I wouldn't miss this at all.

Speaker 103 I just had to bring all the pamphlets.

Speaker 20 Oh, yeah.

Speaker 96 wait a minute.

Speaker 94 Why are you in green?

Speaker 106 I'm always in green.

Speaker 94 No, but it's a pink wedding.

Speaker 8 It's not my wedding.

Speaker 71 Arty.

Speaker 8 What?

Speaker 94 You're lucky that green goes with pink so well, okay?

Speaker 8 Of course it does.

Speaker 41 Look, you've got leaves and things.

Speaker 8 It's green. There's green in this.
Of course I'm green.

Speaker 31 I'm always green.

Speaker 94 I pick some of the pink flowers from around the room and I tuck it into his ropes. You have to have a little something.

Speaker 44 The flowers turn green.

Speaker 73 Oh, come on.

Speaker 62 Look, you're going to stand out and I'm going to stand out just a little.

Speaker 31 What? You're not going to get all the attention on your wedding.

Speaker 94 Do you like my dress?

Speaker 74 He looks down and goes,

Speaker 31 it's very pretty. Thank you.

Speaker 8 No,

Speaker 104 he goes and like claps his hands together.

Speaker 116 And as he brings his fingers apart, you see these like golden thread-like sparkles.

Speaker 44 And as he sets them down towards your direction, the dress begins to lift ever so faintly, like a Disney princess or a

Speaker 115 Sailor Moon transformation.

Speaker 68 You begin to rise up into the air and watch as the bows extend, you watch as the embroidery begins to expand and glisten with a magical light.

Speaker 138 You feel empowered in this moment as Artagon enchants your dress to where it just kind of gently floats around you.

Speaker 20 Wow.

Speaker 11 Yes.

Speaker 11 That is the best wedding present you could have given me.

Speaker 109 Oh, I also brought some bushes, and he points outside, and you watch as some of the exterior bush lines begin to expand and grow with all manner of strange fae flowers that begin to blossom.

Speaker 8 And as they do, they begin to sing.

Speaker 53 This endless chorus of beautiful, harmonizing voices.

Speaker 46 Keyleth just goes, No, no, no, no, no.

Speaker 11 What the fuck?

Speaker 46 What have I, did I do this?

Speaker 79 Shut, shut up, shut up.

Speaker 79 They sound so beautiful.

Speaker 8 And don't worry. I brought the

Speaker 3 requested help.

Speaker 94 Thank you.

Speaker 44 And as he kind of waves his hand, as Keylit's having her chaotic moment, you watch out of the ether nearby as people are beginning to settle in a veritable army of floating pink ethereal hamster unicorns with

Speaker 103 with little collars on and little cuffs

Speaker 38 begin to dart around and rushing and picking up plates and gathering various goodies and snacks and leading people by the arm to their seats suddenly this is a bustling magical event more than it ever was before talking right they were supposed to talk you listening close in the distance you could hear someone be like

Speaker 91 Fran, please sit down.

Speaker 20 The one goes, by the way, it's amazing.

Speaker 91 Come, come. We're supposed to throw this out.

Speaker 91 So happy!

Speaker 53 I told you, this is your special day.

Speaker 97 You know, they said all the gods were killed. But

Speaker 86 you're special.

Speaker 58 Please don't tell anyone that.

Speaker 119 And he hands you one of the pamphlets he's passing around, and it's very similar to the ones that you've created in the past, but it does break down specifically in the pamphlet. It says,

Speaker 44 the traveler, worship him, a wondrous guy to power.

Speaker 8 Not a god.

Speaker 6 Just a really, really powerful guy who's a good guy who occasionally helps you with your troubles, but on a whim and only if it seems fun.

Speaker 77 Good disclaimer.

Speaker 79 Yeah.

Speaker 94 I like especially the part where you say, don't pray to me, but worship me.

Speaker 20 Look,

Speaker 92 it's important to put your boundaries up front, right? Yeah.

Speaker 31 I'm learning about self-care.

Speaker 20 Um, regardless, I'm gonna go ahead and find my place to sit.

Speaker 31 I believe it's about that time.

Speaker 44 He goes and takes your hand for a second and squeezes it. He goes...

Speaker 70 Show them why you...

Speaker 119 Will be the prettiest bride to ever bride.

Speaker 54 And any bride who attempts to rise up to seize your crown will cry and lament and be crushed beneath my heel.

Speaker 54 Woo!

Speaker 125 Have fun, kids.

Speaker 141 Chester,

Speaker 96 you look amazing.

Speaker 28 Look at this, it's so sparkly now.

Speaker 11 Oh, my gosh.

Speaker 101 I think you're ready.

Speaker 96 Yeah, I think.

Speaker 96 Do you have your vows?

Speaker 86 Yeah.

Speaker 101 You know what?

Speaker 102 I'm going to cast Intellect Fortress on you.

Speaker 99 Just in case you get nervous up there and stumble over a word or something.

Speaker 144 You'll be steady in your delivery and

Speaker 97 like you were saying, just

Speaker 99 speak from the heart.

Speaker 101 You'll be fine.

Speaker 99 You, for some reason, love him.

Speaker 97 That's all you need to say.

Speaker 129 For some reason.

Speaker 71 Yeah.

Speaker 85 I love you.

Speaker 102 Yeah, for some reason I love you.

Speaker 100 Okay.

Speaker 111 We might not understand it.

Speaker 111 It might not make any sense.

Speaker 111 But does love ever?

Speaker 78 I do. I don't know.

Speaker 85 I'm working.

Speaker 86 I'm workshop. Okay, okay, okay.

Speaker 94 I'll get something like that today.

Speaker 42 I'll make sure he goes first so you have a chance to top him no matter what.

Speaker 112 Okay. Yeah, no.

Speaker 4 That way you know where the bar is.

Speaker 92 You just have to clean.

Speaker 94 Oh, gosh. What if he's really good, though?

Speaker 4 Well, then you can just undermine him, you know.

Speaker 14 Okay.

Speaker 50 You do it anyway.

Speaker 87 Aw, thanks, Cadizus.

Speaker 11 You're my favorite.

Speaker 20 Ford,

Speaker 139 groomsman, as you are saying your final hellos to everyone, a hush begins to fall over the crowd.

Speaker 67 As the golden hour is nigh,

Speaker 154 and Caduceus begins to step from the lighthouse.

Speaker 106 If you don't mind, Caduceus.

Speaker 3 And if we could please have the podium to the stage.

Speaker 3 As

Speaker 164 everyone hushes

Speaker 34 and music begins to gently swell.

Speaker 45 Cadoosis steps slowly along the pink carpet to the archway.

Speaker 115 And it is there

Speaker 106 that everyone looks up to this

Speaker 32 beautiful cleric

Speaker 4 and Q the flower girl.

Speaker 60 You watch

Speaker 58 as

Speaker 120 a near-teenager girl in black feathers,

Speaker 122 her raven-like beak, Kiri, begins to walk down with a basket,

Speaker 7 releasing clusters of white and pink rose petals along the walkway,

Speaker 31 slowly

Speaker 44 leading the procession behind Cadus

Speaker 44 before stepping off and sitting on the side.

Speaker 94 She is very sweet.

Speaker 37 From there,

Speaker 56 Bo and Caleb enter as groomsmen.

Speaker 55 As they finish

Speaker 44 stepping to the archway,

Speaker 39 Ford, the groom himself.

Speaker 27 emerges

Speaker 54 to meet his fellows.

Speaker 61 Behind them,

Speaker 105 the companions to the bride,

Speaker 55 Veth, Yasha, Essek, and Kingsley all step up

Speaker 149 to flink

Speaker 35 and leave space.

Speaker 35 Now,

Speaker 4 we respectfully ask you all to rise for the bride.

Speaker 132 May all

Speaker 132 Wow

Speaker 4 Usually when I cast that only one person rises that's uh

Speaker 84 nailed it

Speaker 4 I'm used to uh presiding over endings, so to officiate a beginning is a unique privilege.

Speaker 4 Thank you both.

Speaker 4 When I met Jester and Ford,

Speaker 4 I thought I was on a holy mission to guide them and show them a path forward, and

Speaker 4 I quickly realized that that was the arrogant opinion of a sheltered young man.

Speaker 22 Ford.

Speaker 4 I had so little true wisdom to offer someone who was

Speaker 4 building by hand something that I had been given at birth.

Speaker 4 And while I had thought that you were searching for someone to be,

Speaker 4 The truth was you were forging a path towards the best version of the the man you already were.

Speaker 4 Thank you, Captain, for allowing me to sail under your command.

Speaker 42 Jester.

Speaker 4 Your attitude towards life was

Speaker 4 a mystery to me.

Speaker 4 The ignorant would would have called it childishness and did.

Speaker 4 But when the world would challenge you, really, really challenge you, and

Speaker 4 I saw it time and time again,

Speaker 4 you displayed a maturity and wisdom

Speaker 4 that burned in you like a star.

Speaker 4 I realized that what it was was

Speaker 4 romance.

Speaker 4 It was a sense of romance.

Speaker 4 And

Speaker 4 not just the romance of another person, but a romance with everything around you.

Speaker 4 And when I try to look upon the world the way that I see you look upon the world, I see

Speaker 4 poetry everywhere and a delight that is

Speaker 4 always within reach.

Speaker 4 I love you both, and in the time I've spent in your company, I have

Speaker 4 never felt lost.

Speaker 4 When we're together, I feel like a traveler.

Speaker 4 You're welcome, Artie.

Speaker 40 You feel a hand grab your left knuckles, Caduceus, and a voice in your ear goes, oh, I appreciate the idea.

Speaker 4 Ford, I believe you have prepared some words.

Speaker 92 Cadus,

Speaker 44 you notice Deferad, the organizer, is at the front, looking at you directly eyes, and it's going like...

Speaker 43 She kind of darts up real fast, goes to whisper in your ear.

Speaker 43 It's about that moment that a wave of nausea

Speaker 67 echoes instantly through each and every one of you.

Speaker 43 Time seems to slow to a crawl and brought a beef moment as you all watch the sky rapidly go from a beautiful pink and orange

Speaker 32 to a terrifying dark purple black nightmare scape.

Speaker 108 Everyone stands up

Speaker 65 to look towards you.

Speaker 108 Friends

Speaker 108 grasping what they can to run or to run towards you before they all

Speaker 91 vanish.

Speaker 68 You see Essek and Kingsley off to the side.

Speaker 53 All of these hidden, invisible runes.

Speaker 52 Ancient, forgotten, jagged glyphs alight around the entirety of this wedding space.

Speaker 123 Across the pillars, from under the ground, all facing inward here to the central altar and archway.

Speaker 68 Tight enough space where suddenly you see Kingsley and and Essek vanish with the rest of them.

Speaker 157 And here,

Speaker 35 the rest of you stand in this unfamiliar, terrifying black space, this mirrored shard

Speaker 44 of where this wedding was to be.

Speaker 26 The grass now overgrown with vine and leaf.

Speaker 117 Gnarled root creaking as it twists and grows unnaturally around you.

Speaker 7 The trees seem to sink their colors of the banners and the flowers muted to pale grays and whites.

Speaker 105 I need all of you to sit back down and roll a constitution-saving throw for me.

Speaker 105 It's fine.

Speaker 103 We're still having a wedding.

Speaker 94 A constitution?

Speaker 151 Constitution saving throw from everybody, please.

Speaker 73 Fucking Mercer.

Speaker 102 Never invite Matt to a wedding.

Speaker 17 Okay, okay, okay, okay.

Speaker 106 Starting on this side.

Speaker 73 Oh,

Speaker 8 thirteen.

Speaker 29 Thirteen. Failure.

Speaker 92 Twenty-four. Failure.

Speaker 34 Twenty-one.

Speaker 30 Failure.

Speaker 11 Yasha.

Speaker 95 Twenty-five.

Speaker 40 Failure.

Speaker 94 Natural 20.

Speaker 53 Success.

Speaker 77 Twenty-six.

Speaker 30 Failure.

Speaker 46 Twenty-eight.

Speaker 53 Success.

Speaker 157 As the rest of you feel your bodies locked into a terrifying arcane embrace, like the cold slither of a hundred serpents just coasting beneath your skin, your muscles are frozen and you cannot move.

Speaker 31 You can barely utter a muttered phrase.

Speaker 120 You are all considered paralyzed who fails.

Speaker 120 What?

Speaker 72 What?

Speaker 22 I don't like this.

Speaker 126 This demi-plane echo, this in-between space, this mockery of your wedded environment looks around you,

Speaker 43 devoid of life or friendship.

Speaker 66 And just in front of you, you see Defirad looking up at you all.

Speaker 90 I knew it!

Speaker 138 It has taken me years to to wrestle with it all.

Speaker 151 She grins towards you, Jester.

Speaker 156 Watching you from a distance.

Speaker 58 Waiting for the right time.

Speaker 29 One shoulder

Speaker 52 swells.

Speaker 29 Her eyes never leaving yours.

Speaker 114 Her grin tears wide into her mouth.

Speaker 115 You watch as her torso grows three, four times its size.

Speaker 7 This illusion of mist and silver swirls around her as her arms begin to extend and grow an extra joint.

Speaker 46 But Bo is just going to kind of slowly wonk and kind of get between her and Chester.

Speaker 110 Fair.

Speaker 34 You watch as this dark, hulking form that emerges from the shell of illusion that was Defirad.

Speaker 43 Now it's hunched,

Speaker 60 black, tattered robe and magical cord-wrapped body.

Speaker 11 The long

Speaker 158 blackish dark oily hair hanging from the wrinkled, elongated head.

Speaker 29 The extended gnarled nose

Speaker 65 as there before you

Speaker 38 carrying two large odd-looking wicker bags on her back

Speaker 43 stands

Speaker 43 the prism sage.

Speaker 22 Oh shit!

Speaker 53 She walks forward towards you all.

Speaker 166 Little Chester,

Speaker 166 heart of chaos,

Speaker 165 your spirit hides endless generosity,

Speaker 165 a depth of affection and fellowship.

Speaker 165 You gave me that none had

Speaker 165 something that gave me warmth unrecognized.

Speaker 165 But with time,

Speaker 8 I could feel this truth you gave me.

Speaker 112 Fate

Speaker 112 unravel.

Speaker 112 This

Speaker 112 trick.

Speaker 112 This magical deception.

Speaker 112 You scarred on my blackened soul.

Speaker 112 I peeled it away.

Speaker 112 And even in my clarity, I

Speaker 112 clung to this lie like a fading dream.

Speaker 112 I yearned

Speaker 112 for you.

Speaker 112 The longer the dream had faded,

Speaker 112 the more it left this void.

Speaker 112 And the void

Speaker 112 filled with enmity

Speaker 112 with

Speaker 46 hey, yeah, cool speech. Are you on the guest list?

Speaker 46 Well, listen, technically.

Speaker 46 Technically, you are.

Speaker 94 I invited you. Do you?

Speaker 46 Was that the mistake? Jester, this is why Cadusa said you need a guest list. This is why.

Speaker 88 This is why.

Speaker 104 She, like, brings a finger like this.

Speaker 74 Bo Rogar, can you make a Christmas saving throw for me, please?

Speaker 160 Oh, my God.

Speaker 77 You got this, you got this, you got this, you got this, you got this, you got it, got, you got it, got it, got it, got it, I got it, got it, got it, got it.

Speaker 46 As a part, I would just want to say, it's about diamond solo can re-roll safe. So let's see how this is.

Speaker 46 I'm gonna spin a key point to re-roll this safe.

Speaker 82 All right.

Speaker 78 Okay.

Speaker 46 Uh, uh, it's probably not gonna work.

Speaker 78 22.

Speaker 115 Beauregard, as you step in front,

Speaker 103 you vanish from sight.

Speaker 115 The rest of you, for a brief second, watch as Beauregard's body just shimmers away and vanishes.

Speaker 22 Listen, listen, listen, listen, listen, listen. I'm really sorry.

Speaker 104 Are any of you trying to break free of this paralysis?

Speaker 3 Yes!

Speaker 21 Everybody is.

Speaker 110 Alright.

Speaker 57 Now.

Speaker 115 What do you do to try and break free of this?

Speaker 35 I'll ask the first one here, the prominent member Ford.

Speaker 69 Your body does not move.

Speaker 61 What do you do to try and push through this enchantment?

Speaker 84 Get away from her, you bitch!

Speaker 77 Can I cast Hex if I'm paralyzed just with intention, or does it take a movement?

Speaker 3 Does it?

Speaker 44 So, this is the Hex spell?

Speaker 92 Yes. The Hex spell?

Speaker 139 Does it say verbal semantic?

Speaker 54 Yeah, verbal semantic.

Speaker 139 You cannot cast this, yeah.

Speaker 77 I would try and Misty step just in front of Jester as one of my feet.

Speaker 44 That is a verbal component.

Speaker 8 You can speak falteringly.

Speaker 24 So I'll say you.

Speaker 92 You do Misty step next to her.

Speaker 76 You barely utter the word and appear next to her.

Speaker 44 And the Sharon Eye's head

Speaker 44 twists over in your direction.

Speaker 23 Just the amulet.

Speaker 11 The amulet of.

Speaker 105 She looks up towards you

Speaker 69 and says,

Speaker 69 No,

Speaker 69 you

Speaker 69 are mine.

Speaker 58 I

Speaker 138 have been waiting for your

Speaker 156 perfect moment so I can strip everything that matters away from you piece by piece until all that's left is me.

Speaker 139 And her large thumb kind of curls your cheek.

Speaker 30 I need you

Speaker 151 to make a charisma saving throw for me.

Speaker 94 That's not gonna work. That's not gonna work.

Speaker 51 That was a 14.

Speaker 144 Except you have advantage with Intellect Fortress.

Speaker 49 Oh,

Speaker 94 That is a

Speaker 94 twenty-five

Speaker 8 twenty-five is a success.

Speaker 8 Listen,

Speaker 15 I really do like you.

Speaker 94 I don't I don't know why you got so mad at me.

Speaker 94 I've been sending you cupcakes every year.

Speaker 20 I

Speaker 20 covet

Speaker 37 your

Speaker 37 friendship.

Speaker 49 You can have it,

Speaker 20 and I will.

Speaker 20 But I want it all.

Speaker 94 No, I'm marrying marrying Ford.

Speaker 36 She pulls this chain from inside her robe.

Speaker 54 This long, darkened metal

Speaker 92 glass, like chain ends in a glass amulet, like kind of this black, jagged-looking stone that's semi-translucent towards its base.

Speaker 57 This chain is almost five feet in length.

Speaker 127 It's a sort of

Speaker 139 pulls out and goes.

Speaker 139 I understand.

Speaker 139 But you've heard me.

Speaker 139 Heard me deeper than anyone has.

Speaker 139 I.

Speaker 166 I want to take from you what you took from me.

Speaker 166 Which is the truth.

Speaker 166 The truth that someone actually cared.

Speaker 91 No.

Speaker 92 And as she puts the amulet outward, with a flash,

Speaker 53 she closes the distance as her arm suddenly unfolds and unveils with an unseen speed, and the amulet touches your forehead.

Speaker 75 I need you, Jester, to make another Christmas ample control.

Speaker 20 Oh my god.

Speaker 94 Is that an ongoing? I think it's ongoing. Still with advantage?

Speaker 71 I think it's ongoing for an hour.

Speaker 11 Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay.

Speaker 44 Her attempt at direct paralysis failed.

Speaker 71 Oh, I'm not going to do it. 18!

Speaker 31 No! I need you to roll 1d8 for me, if you don't mind, Jester.

Speaker 146 Roll high.

Speaker 146 Four?

Speaker 20 That's... Four.

Speaker 43 As it touches your forehead, your eyes go wide and your mind wanders to the wastes of Jorhas.

Speaker 31 A broken woman with broken...

Speaker 68 Wings.

Speaker 38 Blade dragged behind her.

Speaker 54 Given hope, given love, given family.

Speaker 61 She's been with you as you fought to save the world.

Speaker 34 She's been with you since you nursed her from her trauma with the rest of your friends.

Speaker 8 You've been with her

Speaker 33 till she stood beside you in your wedding.

Speaker 55 And as your eyes come back, you look in that direction

Speaker 155 and you do not recognize her face.

Speaker 55 Your memories of Yasha have been taken from you.

Speaker 55 What

Speaker 94 who is that?

Speaker 49 Oh, I can't talk.

Speaker 78 You're paralyzed.

Speaker 94 What

Speaker 94 for?

Speaker 94 Who's that woman? What do you mean? It's...

Speaker 8 Yosha.

Speaker 94 I really got to unfreeze you.

Speaker 94 Wake up.

Speaker 94 I don't have a spell to help you.

Speaker 8 No, no, no, no!

Speaker 37 Ford falls back

Speaker 8 onto the ground.

Speaker 94 Listen, I don't know what you just did, but can you unfreeze my friends, please?

Speaker 166 We need to finish our conversation.

Speaker 7 Then I'll send them back without an issue.

Speaker 20 I don't hate them.

Speaker 94 You hate me?

Speaker 11 You hate me?

Speaker 165 I love you and I hate you.

Speaker 165 I saw not

Speaker 165 it doesn't have to be like this.

Speaker 44 Make a persuasion rule for me.

Speaker 154 Oh, boy.

Speaker 154 Oh, boy.

Speaker 47 Why is my persuasion so low?

Speaker 47 Is it always well for James?

Speaker 47 Oh man.

Speaker 47 Natural 20.

Speaker 47 Okay. Okay.

Speaker 10 Good night, everybody.

Speaker 74 Miss Sharon I kind of steps forward and looks at you, her bulbous face, her eyes going a bit soft as she steps in, her whole body almost not just towering over you, but almost encircling you like

Speaker 113 a parent would envelop a child.

Speaker 127 Her hands kind of reaching down towards your shoulders, the amulet still kind of dangling from her hands, goes,

Speaker 127 I've just been so lost,

Speaker 127 Lost.

Speaker 91 And I don't like being made a fool.

Speaker 91 I understand.

Speaker 44 A second voice peeks out from nowhere that goes.

Speaker 53 Sage, you fool, what are you doing?

Speaker 33 We came all this way and you're just going to stop talking.

Speaker 3 And you see as one of the two wicker baskets that's affixed to her shoulders kind of shifts into place and within it you see a figure

Speaker 54 bound in magical chains.

Speaker 52 A fae elf looking creature, feminine, old, weathered, her vibrant orange hair itself framing a massive set of curving bull-like horns,

Speaker 58 armor of leather and leaves, and numerous tattoos that emblazon her flesh, her eyes burning red, and a metal clasp around her throat that glows with pulsing runes.

Speaker 154 A prisoner of some kind in one of these baskets that speaks out with familiarity.

Speaker 52 Do not let this creature manipulate you again.

Speaker 44 Another voice creeps up as cold

Speaker 44 air begins to breathe forth from it. The secondary wicker basket revealing a frail,

Speaker 70 waifish, pale feminine figure.

Speaker 107 Long white hair, colorless skin, sunken, white eyes, corpse-like.

Speaker 44 In a sleeveless kind of death shroud dress that's pulled tight against the body, also bound in chains with the same sort of throat clasp.

Speaker 79 Two

Speaker 20 packed companions

Speaker 31 to this hag as the other pipes in.

Speaker 61 All you've done is talk of her.

Speaker 148 And when the time comes, you cannot finish it.

Speaker 8 How sad,

Speaker 55 how disappointing is Shawnee.

Speaker 151 Sharon's like, Shut up!

Speaker 151 Shut up!

Speaker 151 Who are they?

Speaker 151 Their old friend.

Speaker 151 They seem nice.

Speaker 138 Walk with me, dear. Okay.

Speaker 56 She puts her hand out.

Speaker 113 Her weird, double-elbowed arm kind of reaching out, and her fingers curl around your arm as you both begin to walk away from the rest.

Speaker 113 I really wait for you.

Speaker 11 Okay,

Speaker 94 okay.

Speaker 11 I'm a little nervous now.

Speaker 72 Where are we going?

Speaker 153 How will you welcome me back into your life?

Speaker 166 How will you make room for me?

Speaker 94 Um, have you ever been on a boat?

Speaker 94 No.

Speaker 94 Listen, my husband to be, he's really dashing, super nice.

Speaker 94 He's an admiral, technically. He has a lot of ships, and we are always looking for people to join us on our, you know, crazy times.

Speaker 94 I think you and your little basket friends would be great additions.

Speaker 119 Clutching Clutching your hand, she kind of stops the walk about thirty feet from the rest of your friends and says,

Speaker 8 Do you love him?

Speaker 94 I'm afraid you're going to do something bad if I say I do.

Speaker 94 Do you

Speaker 94 love him?

Speaker 94 Um

Speaker 92 she looks back at him on the ground, frozen still.

Speaker 11 I do

Speaker 100 not as much as you, I tell you that much.

Speaker 93 Make another persuasion check

Speaker 41 or deception. I mean

Speaker 36 As she looks at you, a smile that curls and tears across her long face, the teeth overlapping and protruding in different angles, the scent of rotting vegetation emanating from her breath as she curls in.

Speaker 165 Again,

Speaker 91 you.

Speaker 92 And she jabs the amulet to your forehead once more.

Speaker 151 Make another Christmas saving throw for me.

Speaker 11 you got this you got this

Speaker 77 another not 20 so you have an advantage mathematical statistics are in your favor

Speaker 94 those are double 19s um so that puts me at uh 28 28 that's a success

Speaker 38 you feel

Speaker 53 you feel the enchantment try and push into your mind,

Speaker 158 but the bonds of familial love and friendship that that you carry rebukes this magical probe.

Speaker 20 Why, why, why?

Speaker 94 19 plus 8 is 27.

Speaker 28 That's still...

Speaker 28 Oh my god!

Speaker 71 Okay.

Speaker 61 As she withdraws the amulet,

Speaker 103 as this rebuke happens with a flicker, and all of you feel this hold on you seem to almost lose strength for a moment.

Speaker 3 And you feel this force, this push and pull of memory, this push and pull of dynamic relationship that flicker.

Speaker 68 You feel like the flood of fractures of memories through your times together kind of sparks in your mind and then fades for a moment.

Speaker 20 This enchantment that holds you at bay is a strange old Fae enchantment, prepped as it was

Speaker 61 and seems to have

Speaker 61 odd ways to challenge it.

Speaker 75 Would any of you like to attempt something?

Speaker 19 Yeah.

Speaker 40 What would you like to do, Caleb?

Speaker 4 I will mutter, if I can, the words to blink out of this reality and in in a different location.

Speaker 31 And to

Speaker 4 just wink out so that I am out of that power and then back in, and hopefully that will free me of the hold.

Speaker 57 I'll allow it.

Speaker 40 I will ask you

Speaker 126 to roll a D-100

Speaker 54 because you are attempting this in technically an unfamiliar place, but you have seen it.

Speaker 44 And you are doing it under the duress of limited verbosity.

Speaker 141 53

Speaker 144 Chetney just died.

Speaker 40 53.

Speaker 40 You

Speaker 117 vanish from the space, the enchantment dropping from around you.

Speaker 68 And suddenly you stand in the middle of some strange fae forest

Speaker 54 with a clearing that ends at a cliffside and some sort of strange churning purple ocean below.

Speaker 67 You have no idea where you are.

Speaker 4 Looking out at the vista under my breath, I just say,

Speaker 13 which is coven.

Speaker 166 Just like the books.

Speaker 31 The rest of you, would you like to attempt anything?

Speaker 46 Am I still missed?

Speaker 60 You, now we come to you.

Speaker 29 You have been floating somewhere in an endless sky.

Speaker 35 There are distant, slow-spinning rocks or islands of material, and you have been just falling endlessly into

Speaker 116 a slightly darkened blue expanse.

Speaker 123 Oh, fuck.

Speaker 6 Coming back to the rest of you.

Speaker 11 Okay.

Speaker 80 With my cloak, I can dimension door.

Speaker 104 You can dimension door within 500 feet that you can see.

Speaker 87 Come back to me.

Speaker 11 Alright.

Speaker 72 I don't know what to do.

Speaker 91 You wanna go? Sure.

Speaker 99 Just trying to shake.

Speaker 89 We're still sort of semi-paralyzed or are we...

Speaker 44 Yeah, your bodies cannot move. You can falteringly speak.

Speaker 144 I'm going to attempt, I don't know if it's gonna work, I'm gonna attempt to shake myself out of this.

Speaker 162 I heard the name Asharnai.

Speaker 144 This is the hag who condemned me to goblinhood for several years.

Speaker 144 Overcome with fury at her for robbing me of those years, I'm going to try to shake myself out of this paralysis by giving myself shocking grasp.

Speaker 106 Here's what happens.

Speaker 114 As you begin to delve into the emotional memory of what this entity has done to you,

Speaker 43 that fury, that vengeful rage that you had long put aside and locked in a box far within has been unlatched.

Speaker 126 And that fire within begins to burn and grow.

Speaker 117 And as it does, you feel it push against against these ancient binds, that emotional memory itself challenging this old Fae magic.

Speaker 92 You can make your saving throw once more, your constitution saving throw.

Speaker 35 However, you can choose to either sacrifice a spell slot and gain plus one per level of the spell sacrificed, or

Speaker 35 you can sacrifice hit points at a plus one per 15 hit points taken.

Speaker 18 How much do you love, Jessica?

Speaker 85 So much.

Speaker 144 I'll sacrifice 45 hit points.

Speaker 144 Oh my gosh.

Speaker 144 I'll sacrifice 45 hit points.

Speaker 2 Let's see what that does.

Speaker 8 Okay.

Speaker 153 That's a plus three.

Speaker 11 Oh, yeah.

Speaker 81 31.

Speaker 29 With that, the slow, red-pulsing runes and sigils that sit beneath and around you on this arched altar

Speaker 43 shatter with the resounding sound of breaking glass and Veth.

Speaker 43 You get your body back.

Speaker 100 Come on, old girl, let's go do some damage.

Speaker 139 The rest of you?

Speaker 94 You see

Speaker 95 Yasha's eyes start to glimmer

Speaker 11 and

Speaker 95 I'm going to try to push out my wings.

Speaker 44 You concentrate and reach into that

Speaker 120 divine bloodline, that touch of the gods that has carried you through your trauma.

Speaker 152 that has brought you to strength, to victory, to love.

Speaker 36 And those wings

Speaker 11 shoot out.

Speaker 36 You see images of Zuala, your love once lost.

Speaker 32 See images of your current love, currently lost.

Speaker 90 What is losing everything?

Speaker 8 Gotta put an apple tag on that.

Speaker 125 What does this make you feel?

Speaker 82 Um

Speaker 11 deep sadness

Speaker 11 and

Speaker 89 loss

Speaker 20 and regret

Speaker 44 as your wings slowly unfurl. You can make another Constitution saving throw.
You can decide to get any bonuses you'd like at a plus one per 15 hit points taken.

Speaker 77 What was the other one?

Speaker 8 Plus one for 15 hit points or

Speaker 120 sacrifice a spell slot at a plus one per level of the spell slot sacrificed.

Speaker 70 Oh my gosh. You can do both, technically.

Speaker 57 If you're feeling lucky.

Speaker 94 Alright, so I will do.

Speaker 95 It's one plus one per 15.

Speaker 11 Okay.

Speaker 94 So I will do.

Speaker 46 I'll do 60.

Speaker 113 Alright, take that plus 4 bonus.

Speaker 17 Gosh.

Speaker 17 Okay.

Speaker 19 Oh no, which one do I roll?

Speaker 94 Okay, I'm gonna go with this one.

Speaker 57 Alright.

Speaker 57 Okay.

Speaker 143 How many? Four?

Speaker 153 Four. Plus four.

Speaker 95 Okay, that is 26.

Speaker 8 That's a success.

Speaker 89 You

Speaker 116 feel that heartbreak and you scream out

Speaker 132 a...

Speaker 158 a fury

Speaker 56 and a profound

Speaker 32 sense

Speaker 92 of regret that you haven't let take over in some time.

Speaker 36 As you do, your wings,

Speaker 54 fully feathered, extend,

Speaker 127 and your body is yours once more.

Speaker 44 The Sharnai glances back at the wrist and says,

Speaker 58 Your friends are

Speaker 58 frustrating.

Speaker 127 At which point,

Speaker 54 one of the witch-like entities in her back says, Well, of course they are.

Speaker 29 She keeps friends, you know, treating them well.

Speaker 52 As the Shauna goes, Shut your teeth, Erythonia!

Speaker 138 Erythiona. That sounds better.

Speaker 36 And you see, she snaps her finger, and

Speaker 66 suddenly there is a glowing squiggle of magical Arcane that is, Arcana that is currently holding her mouth shut.

Speaker 144 A squidgel?

Speaker 31 A squidgel, if you will.

Speaker 103 It's pronounced squiggle.

Speaker 105 What would you like to do, Chester?

Speaker 85 Oh, gosh.

Speaker 94 I'm going to try.

Speaker 94 She's still right next to me. Oh, yeah.

Speaker 94 Could I

Speaker 110 grab.

Speaker 47 Okay.

Speaker 94 Her amulet. Is it in her hand or is it hanging from her robes?

Speaker 40 It's on a

Speaker 36 long chain that is around her neck.

Speaker 57 Oh.

Speaker 118 And it's like just she's pulled a large part of the chain out from under her robes and she's clutching it in her hand.

Speaker 20 Okay.

Speaker 94 That's different.

Speaker 94 Um

Speaker 94 I'm going

Speaker 11 to

Speaker 94 look her in the eyes

Speaker 94 and say

Speaker 94 Okay, so I don't love you more than Ford, but that's because I want to marry him and be with him forever.

Speaker 94 But you, I could totally see being one of my very good friends. You know, if you'd ever responded to one of my messages, you could have been in the bridal party at least.

Speaker 94 And I'm going to

Speaker 94 say sorry. And as I say sorry, I'm going to cast a divine word.

Speaker 94 Now, I don't know where we are exactly.

Speaker 94 Are we...

Speaker 101 Where are we?

Speaker 94 I should have asked that.

Speaker 94 Well, are we in her plane?

Speaker 126 You are in a plane that is a dark mirror image of the wedding ceremony space.

Speaker 103 Okay.

Speaker 31 It feels crafted,

Speaker 29 sort of in between.

Speaker 83 Okay.

Speaker 11 All right.

Speaker 61 So as you cast that,

Speaker 8 she's going to make a Christmas saving throw.

Speaker 8 That's going to be a 14

Speaker 8 plus

Speaker 44 23.

Speaker 94 Now, here's the thing.

Speaker 49 Yeah?

Speaker 94 Yes, wait, hold on.

Speaker 72 La la la la la.

Speaker 94 This is regardless of lolol,

Speaker 94 you succeeded.

Speaker 39 So, describe to me how you cast this spell and it fails.

Speaker 94 It's just verbal, so I'm going to boop her on the nose and say, sorry.

Speaker 94 And that's all that Jill thinks I did.

Speaker 30 You boop her, and there's a

Speaker 105 her eyes catch your finger, and for a second, as invisible as you thought your casting was, you see the shapes of your casting still kind of adrift in the air before they fade.

Speaker 114 In a flash, the amulet strikes your forehead again.

Speaker 115 Make another charisma saving saving throw for me.

Speaker 94 Listen.

Speaker 88 Beauregard.

Speaker 80 Yep.

Speaker 158 You appear back on the ground.

Speaker 56 Your banishment now has faded.

Speaker 21 Oh.

Speaker 46 Did I just did so much research for no reason?

Speaker 11 Great.

Speaker 46 I'll save that astral projection for another time, I guess.

Speaker 83 All right, cool.

Speaker 92 Sorry.

Speaker 140 That's

Speaker 94 20.

Speaker 40 I'd like you to roll a D8 for me, please?

Speaker 86 Roll low.

Speaker 90 Well, you might be number one.

Speaker 90 Oh, no.

Speaker 90 Eight!

Speaker 112 Oh, no.

Speaker 118 Growing up in the chateau,

Speaker 39 you couldn't help

Speaker 61 but be spellbound by her beauty, her confidence.

Speaker 71 You monster.

Speaker 35 Her grace.

Speaker 61 And the love that she gave you.

Speaker 31 You monster.

Speaker 35 Her red skin and hair, the talk of Xandria,

Speaker 38 her strength

Speaker 139 and endurance in raising you and showing you all the wonders and colors of the world, so you could step where she could not.

Speaker 35 But her face is hard to grasp.

Speaker 8 What were you thinking about?

Speaker 8 You can't remember.

Speaker 8 I can give them back.

Speaker 94 Give who back?

Speaker 94 What are you doing? What is that thing you do?

Speaker 107 I'm just making space

Speaker 166 for your forever friend.

Speaker 94 You?

Speaker 94 You're my forever. Am I gonna be in the basket? Am I gonna be a basket friend?

Speaker 46 I'm not paralyzed, right? No.

Speaker 46 Yeah, fuck this shit. I'm running up.
Pop, pop.

Speaker 86 Fuck these.

Speaker 164 Tired of this shit.

Speaker 46 Fucking falling in the fucking plane of air or some shit for 20 minutes.

Speaker 92 Let's go.

Speaker 11 Falling for 30 minutes.

Speaker 71 All right, let's go. Let's go.

Speaker 46 Two, two pops. Two pops.

Speaker 17 Ooh.

Speaker 77 Oogie. Good research.

Speaker 19 Big research.

Speaker 46 Big research. Okay, well, the first one,

Speaker 46 one will be a 20.

Speaker 11 That misses. Ah!

Speaker 46 Then the other one also misses.

Speaker 72 Shit.

Speaker 46 Bonus action, I'm going to do it again.

Speaker 31 Yeah. Gloria blows.
Let's go.

Speaker 72 Pop, pop.

Speaker 86 Okay, okay.

Speaker 46 Let's start with the eight. So the 21 probably also misses.

Speaker 8 That misses.

Speaker 89 How about.

Speaker 46 Wait, did I do that right?

Speaker 97 Is it three?

Speaker 20 No.

Speaker 46 Twenty eight.

Speaker 82 Yeah, 21.

Speaker 46 And then the next one will definitely be

Speaker 89 31.

Speaker 11 Whoa, that hits.

Speaker 46 Okay, let's just start. That was my unarmed strike.
So.

Speaker 73 Okay.

Speaker 46 That is going to be

Speaker 46 11 hit points, stunning strike.

Speaker 84 Alright.

Speaker 84 No effect.

Speaker 46 Bitch is immune. Bitch is immune.

Speaker 19 Okay.

Speaker 46 Last thing, since I hit her with my flurry of blows to distract aspects.

Speaker 115 As you expand your spiritual energy into her form in that impact,

Speaker 60 you read

Speaker 61 facets of this ancient soul.

Speaker 113 You do acknowledge it is,

Speaker 44 she is, resistant to cold, fire, and psychic damage.

Speaker 46 Resistant.

Speaker 132 Cold fire, psychic direct psychic damage.

Speaker 61 She also is immune to being blinded,

Speaker 57 charmed,

Speaker 106 frightened,

Speaker 74 and paralyzed and stunned, though there's an...

Speaker 33 an odd flicker to that resilience.

Speaker 72 Okay.

Speaker 46 I turn around to my party and go, guys, she's got resistance to coal fire inside.

Speaker 46 And she's immediate.

Speaker 46 Oh, they're all still really f ⁇ ed. Everybody's messed up.
Everyone's really messed up.

Speaker 94 Who's that lady over there?

Speaker 89 Yasha?

Speaker 119 Is Sharnai at this point, taking the impact, spins and looks at you, Beauregard, looks at the rest of you, pushing and resisting against this ancient enchantment, and brings her hands together.

Speaker 165 Fine,

Speaker 165 I could just erase their memories, but I could also erase their very lives.

Speaker 165 You did this to me, Chester.

Speaker 94 She is so obsessed.

Speaker 112 Yeah,

Speaker 94 gross. I want to make a run for her.

Speaker 4 I'm gonna cast divine intervention.

Speaker 35 You go charging in.

Speaker 44 What are you asking for, Cadoosis?

Speaker 44 Do we have anything?

Speaker 4 We need to be free and we need to be able to run, please.

Speaker 53 Here in this shadow realm, where everything is given a twisted, warped,

Speaker 61 visual memory of the space of great joy you just left, there is this blackened, towering shape,

Speaker 32 this

Speaker 43 shadow nightmare of the lighthouse above itself curved.

Speaker 117 And in an instant,

Speaker 26 color spills around it.

Speaker 61 And for a moment here in this in-between plane, you see unveiled the true lighthouse of the Wild Mother.

Speaker 61 And as it glows across the way, a Sharnite

Speaker 117 kind of seems to duck out from the moment while the rest of you feel the binds of this ancient enchantment shatter and your bodies are yours once more.

Speaker 38 As Yasha's charging in and the rest of you gather yourselves,

Speaker 54 Caleb's somewhere in some other section of these woods.

Speaker 112 We're going to go to break.

Speaker 71 You monster. This is the worst wedding ever.

Speaker 72 Monster.

Speaker 103 We'll see you all here in a few minutes.

Speaker 140 Oh my God.

Speaker 162 That concludes part one of this podcast episode. Part two will land here this upcoming Tuesday at 5 a.m.
Pacific, and we'll pick up this story right where we left off.

Speaker 162 Thanks again for listening, and we'll be back on this adventure in no time.

Speaker 19 Welcome back to Listen to Your Heart.

Speaker 136 I'm Jerry, and I'm Jerry's Heart.

Speaker 132 Today's topic, Repatha, Eveloki Map.

Speaker 50 Heart, why'd you pick this one?

Speaker 136 Well, Jerry, Jerry, for people who have had a heart attack, like us, diet and exercise might not be enough to lower the risk of another one.

Speaker 150 Okay.

Speaker 136 To help know if we're at risk, we should be getting our LDLC, our bad cholesterol, checked and talking to our doctor.

Speaker 23 I'm listening.

Speaker 136 And if it's still too high, Rapatha can be added to a statin to lower our LDLC and our heart attack risk.

Speaker 19 Hmm.

Speaker 23 Guess it's time to ask about Repatha.

Speaker 78 Do not take Repatha if you're allergic to it.

Speaker 12 Serious allergic reactions can occur. Get medical help right away if you have trouble breathing or swallowing.
Swelling of the face, lips, tongue, throat, or arms.

Speaker 12 Common side effects include runny nose, sore throat, common cold symptoms, flu or flu-like symptoms, back pain, high blood sugar, and redness, pain, or bruising at the injection site.

Speaker 42 Listen to your heart.

Speaker 137 Ask your doctor about Rapatha.

Speaker 150 Learn more at Rapatha.com or call 1-844-RAPATHA.

Speaker 81 Did my card go through?

Speaker 90 Oh no.

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