Masculinity, Motivation & Modern Challenges Explained | Stirling Cooper DSH #1292

like, it's kind of democratized, if you want to call it, democratized, like, yeah, influence.

Yeah, it's really, people say it's toxic, and it's,

which is correct.

It is, it is a bit toxic and stuff, but yeah, I don't know, ride the tiger, man.

You gotta, you gotta enjoy that.

You gotta have fun with it.

You can't take it too seriously.

Completely.

Yeah, if you take Serial Detail seriously, you'll be like in a depressive black hole.

Absolutely.

All right, guys, he is back.

Sterling Cooper, one of my first guests ever, I think, man.

It's been a while.

It has been a while.

Yeah.

You said two years, right?

Two years, but I think you were within the first couple hundred episodes.

That flew by.

Yeah, man.

Bro.

Damn.

What you been up to?

Same old, same old?

Oh, yeah.

Bouncing around, doing a lot of podcasts.

Still working?

Still working, still flying around a bunch.

I spent about a bunch of time in the south of Spain.

Nice.

In the last couple of years, I did like a fight camp out there.

Really?

And then did like a

white-collar boxing fight.

So you actually fought?

Yeah, yeah.

Fight a girl, you you win.

I won.

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah.

Do you want to get more into boxing?

I've been boxing since then.

Yeah.

I sort of started boxing a little bit before that.

And then, you know, eventually the opportunity came, presented itself.

I was like, you know what?

Yes.

If I'm, you know, when you sort of get into something, you keep telling yourself you're going to take it more seriously.

And it was like someone presented me the opportunity, a friend, Luke Barnett, who was like, look, we're doing this like, you know, fight club thing.

Like, yes.

Because if I don't say no, if I don't say yes now, and that was at what, what am I 38?

That was like 35, 36 years old.

If I don't say now, yes now, I'm never going to say yes to an opportunity like this later on.

And it's kind of interesting.

I've got a few friends in like Dubai who do like, you know, charity, like fight clubs and stuff now.

And I've seen a lot of guys getting into it.

It's really good.

I like it.

I mean, the money in it's pretty crazy these days with Dubai and Saudi, the fighting.

Oh, when they get like big crypto guys in to do it boxing.

Yeah, that's that's interesting.

That's interesting.

But it's, I think, I honestly think the reason I did it is because if I have a, I want to, when I have a kid I want I don't have kids yet, but when I have a kid I want him to like learn how to fight.

Yeah.

You know, I think it's a very good foundational skill, good confidence builder, good athletic athleticism builder for like any young man to take up.

And it's like, if dad hasn't stepped in the ring,

how can he look at me like look at me with respect?

How can he expect me to tell him what to do?

Good point.

So look, I'm going to have to do it.

Yeah.

You know, so I went out and did it.

Yeah.

It's good to have that confidence in your back pocket too, I bet.

Yeah, it's interesting.

You know what?

You know what I realized is like, to be fair, the guy I fought, for fair credit to him i beat him but he was like objectively a better boxer oh really i just had a better strategy like but i think i think just just i mean he punched harder than i felt yeah when like then i felt like i was punching him i think he was a better fighter technically but i just got him um so that and and it was weird like even though i won i was like humbled at the same time yeah what was the strategy with him uh i just went like i was a pressure fighter apply pressure i just applied a lot of pressure i turned it into a brawl and i was like i didn't i didn't i didn't i didn't let it fall into like a technical fight because if

if it was like a technical, you know,

you know, timing waiting for your moment to strike, like, I would have lost.

Yeah.

I think if I, but I was like, stuff this.

I'm just going to go push him against the ropes, you know, pressure him, pressure him, pressure him.

Yeah.

And he was a bit too, he had a bit more length on me.

He was about your height, like a bit of a bit skinny kid, but he had a lot of range on him.

So that's why Floyd was so good.

He just kept it tactical.

Floyd is like, you watch, watch him, man.

He's like the best offensive boxer ever.

He's incredible.

Like, I love that Philly Shell style, but I'm just not that

quick.

You got some time.

Yeah, yeah.

Did you have to give up sex before the fight?

I didn't have sex.

I didn't, I like no fapped and didn't have sex for like,

I think a no-fapped for like probably the good, yeah, probably a good couple of months.

And I didn't have sex for like probably a good two weeks leading up to the fight.

And for you, that's like a record.

Maybe it's a record.

I don't really kept track of that before.

But it was, yeah,

it felt good, man.

Like, just letting all that tension and energy just build up in you, you know, keeps you focused, keeps you dialed in, stops you from fucking around, like keeps your diet on point, keeps training on point.

Like, it was, it was cool.

My first few years of business, entrepreneurship, I didn't fap.

I didn't have sex.

It gets to the point where you're just...

finishing your sleep, honestly.

Right, right.

Because you're months in.

You got the

whole wet dream thing going on.

But you're dialed in like that.

When you're in that work mode, dude, you could channel that sexual energy into like a lot of progress.

Yeah, man, it's an old school.

People, people call it like woo-woo and whatever.

Like, okay, I don't think it's going to make you fly, you know, but I do think there is like something to it.

Um, there's a reason a lot of like athletes, professional fighters, they don't have sex, they abstain before a big game or a big, a big fight, or whatever.

You know, guys have been doing it for forever.

I think there's a

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A lot of bro science over like conventional, like conventional studies or conventional, the things I might see in like the news and the media.

Yeah.

I'll definitely trust bro science over everything else.

I feel that.

Yeah.

Have you measured your testosterone levels ever?

Ages ago, ages ago, I did like a bunch of TRTs.

I can't tell you like how, what my levels were to be perfectly honest, because they actually, they use different, they use different like measurements in like

in Australia versus here.

Oh, they do, yeah, like it's like it's like nanograms for a decaliter one place, and then it's like something else another place.

They use a different measurement.

I'm sure it's not an issue for you, anyways.

Yeah, I mean, I'm not, I'm not like super, super high T, to be perfectly honest.

I'm not super high T.

Um, I think I am relatively high DHT, though.

So, and a lot of people contribute like balding to DHT,

but that's not entirely the case.

Like DH, DHT is kind of like all the all the things that people think testosterone does for you, like all these super like masculine, hyper-aggressive like traits.

It's actually DHT that does a lot of that stuff.

Like assertiveness, confidence, I think like work ethic, sex drive.

A lot of these things are actually related to more related to DHT than strictly testosterone.

Because you like, if you increase your testosterone, you're going to typically increase DHT.

Like, some of it is going to convert.

But

if you're a guy with like

regular testosterone, but like high DHT, you're probably a lot more driven.

Damn.

I need to measure my DHT levels.

Yeah, it's interesting.

It's super interesting.

I did not know that.

Because

if I'm getting the chemistry correct,

your testosterone can convert to like either estrogen or DHT, you know, one or the other.

Yeah.

A lot of high estrogen right now in guys.

A lot of dudes are high estrogen.

Yeah.

You know, a lot of, a lot of things, like people try to tackle things like

sex home and binding globulin, like SHBG, with things like stinging nettle root and stuff to try and increase their, like, free testosterone.

But then sometimes that free testosterone can convert.

Yeah, like I said, to estrogen estradiol, maybe, and DHD.

But

it's, yeah, I think the big problem with like

the over-estrogenification of dudes is more, is...

It's like we're being attacked on like all fronts.

It's you've got like estradiol in the municipal water supply right the birth control which comes from birth control that's in the shower water that's in the drinking water that's in it like so if you're going to filter your water you know you might drink you know filtered water or whatever but if you're showering it you're still your skin is like your biggest organ right you're still gonna absorb you know you need it's it's it's you know fat cells and stuff that's what you're showering daily so exactly like so it's kind of hard to avoid all of this stuff like EMF like I've heard I've heard a lot of stuff recently like

like EMF signals like Wi-Fi and stuff and phones and stuff stuff yeah really screw with like your balls really really screw with like your sperm yeah yeah i got the i don't know if these help but i got the aries tech oh yeah i don't know if it helps i know people who carry their shit around in a faraday bag oh yeah just to completely like i have one next to me and bed because i don't want to sleep next to my phone yeah like i've heard i i know some people who recommend like turning off wi-fi when you sleep like having a timer on the wi-fi like turning try to get that off but the problem like that's all well and good but it's probably still like getting in through your walls and your windows from all your neighbors yeah if you're living in a high-rise you're screwed you're pretty much screwed man so it's like damn how do you get away from all this stuff and like the only conclusion i've come to is like

live in the middle of nowhere you live in the middle of nowhere live on a farm which is not good for business live in the forest which isn't good for business unfortunately um yeah so i'm in the i'm in the process of trying to figure out how to do that transition exactly yeah i think we're at the point now where we accept it we just got to detox as much as possible yeah it's it's hard like it's in all that stuff and then you got then you got lots of phytoestrogens in the food we eat like how's the food in australia is it any better i think the food in Australia is fantastic.

Okay.

Now, it is getting a bit worse.

They just introduced some stupid thing.

This a chemical called Bovir, which was supposed to like Bovir, I think it's Bovair.

They feed to the cows to stop the cows from farting.

Really?

To reduce methane?

Why does that matter?

Yeah, exactly.

There's no question.

Why does that matter?

It's for climate change or something.

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That's great.

Except that was Aries' time.

Oh, my God.

No shit.

But Ove has been linked to like, I think it's increased rates of like cancer.

Wow.

In the people, like, you know, on the consumption end, like our end.

Yeah, because if you're stopping the firing, the gas is still in the body.

Yeah, it's this, you can't screw with nature.

You know, I've been diving into a lot of, this is not what anyone would expect me to know about.

I've been diving a lot into like soil health and like permaculture and agriculture and stuff and the way you use animals on the land.

And it's just like nature has all the answers, man.

Like everything is so,

everything has a, as a, as a role to play in a system and it's so perfectly interconnected.

And if you just let it, you just let nature do what it's, what it's, what it does best, you know, like I know, like I know in

certain parts of like, maybe, I'm not sure about here, but definitely in Australia, they've got like problems with like blackberry bushes and stuff like over you know going nuts and you see people coming and they just put goats on them and the goats just eat them up really and like cool this weed is no longer a problem and then you get you get pigs through the pigs root around dig up the roots cool gone problem gone put grass in there again happy days like it's beautiful and it's just like using animals to like and i think we lost a lot of this knowledge like our ancestors do all this shit They did a lot of this stuff.

Well, they learned all of this stuff through trial and error.

And now we think we can just sort of like

impose like

chemicals or

in the case of humans, we can just impose pharmaceuticals onto us and we'll fix the problem.

But the problem is really just fixed with diet and lifestyle in a lot of ways, with humans at least.

Yeah.

Like we can't, if you come back to basics, like if you pretty much, everyone wants like to shortcut shit, you know, like take TIT, take a different peptide, do this special thing, do that special thing.

It's like,

have you considered just like

turning off your phone, not staring at your computer screen, like,

you know, maybe living somewhere where you're not, there's no like light pollution and you can get like darkness in your bedroom?

Like I went home.

I'm from like the southwest of WA

and I went to stay with my dad, with my, like my home, my family, family, where I grew up.

And I had the best sleep of my life.

I'm like, like window shades like wide open and it's pitch black.

There's like nothing.

There's nobody around.

There's nothing there.

It's just when it's nighttime, it's nighttime.

And it's, it's crazy how much something as subtle as that can massively impact your health and your sleep and thus your testosterone and everything else.

Just the light pollution.

Just the light pollution, bro.

That's crazy.

I just went to Sedona, similar.

Best sleep of my life.

You can see all the stars over there.

Like in Vegas.

I mean, just so much light pollution and whatever else.

This is the city of Neon Lights, you know?

Yeah.

Yeah.

I mean, you got the Luxer beaming up to the moon.

That's where I'm staying, right?

Oh, the Lugser?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

That was the first hotel I ever stayed in in Vegas.

Yeah.

It's like a rite of passage.

It's interesting because they got like a.

I just like it because it's close to the airport.

But they got like the elevators are like diagonal.

Yeah, because it's like a pyramid.

Because it's a pyramid.

Yeah.

That's funny, bro.

So that fighting stuff kind of counteracts with your actual work then, huh?

Yeah, it compliments it, I think.

You think so?

Yeah, yeah.

Like,

because I never got into fighting.

Like, I knew a bunch of people who were fighters before I started doing boxing.

Yeah.

And, you know, I'm just amateur or whatever, just do it as a hobby.

But

of all the guys I know who have a background in fighting or who have fought for a long time, none of them ever had any problems with what you would call like performance anxiety.

It's like when a dude's like a bit too shy and anxious and nervous when he's with a woman and he can't get his dick up.

Fighters didn't seem to have that problem.

Just from when I'm like, because these guys talk to me about this shit behind closed doors because they're not going to talk about it like openly, you know, out there in the real world.

Because I'm the sex guy, right?

So they'll come to me and like, they'll talk about this and that and maybe they're having a different problem over over here or there.

But

if they ever had a problem, it was never that.

It was never like they're too anxious to get it up.

Because if you think about it, like, man,

getting your head kicked in or getting punched in the face or getting like choked

or your arm ripped off, it's a bit, it's nowhere near as like, it's a lot more, that is a lot more intimidating, a lot more extreme

than, oh, does this woman think I'm sexy?

Does this woman like, you know, care what I look like naked marketing?

That makes sense.

Plus the confidence you get from it.

Bro, it all ties in together, man so I think I think for guys like I couldn't encourage it enough like learn some kind of muscle bro well I just had Tate on and he said for all his children they're gonna be fighters right like it's not negotiable for his children yeah yeah and it kind of makes sense I mean he did it you know it worked for him why not you get the confidence from it yeah like I spent my whole youth playing basketball and I kind of I kind of wish And it turns out my dad actually used to box in the army.

Oh, wow.

And he never told me this until I was like an adult.

Damn.

For some reason, that topic never came up.

And I'm kind of pissed that he never came up

because he could have taught me.

And I'm like,

I wish, I actually think it would.

I mean, yeah, I got a lot of athleticism and I've got good balance and stuff from like playing basketball, good, good, like situational awareness, spatial awareness.

You know, there's certain skills that come with every sport, right?

But I think if I'd throw in a little bit of boxing here and there, it would have been way better.

I feel though.

I'm playing tomorrow morning if you want to come.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah.

You still play?

It's been a long time.

Been a while.

It's been a long time.

I'm not as explosive as I used to be.

It's tough on the knees as you get older, man.

I sprained my, dude.

I'm only 28 but now when i sprain my ankle it takes a week to heal when i was like 18 i'd be fine the next day yeah yeah it's crazy how the body ages so i think i've done both ankles like about four times oh that's it that's actually not that bad yeah yeah yeah steph curry be rolling them like once a week

you watch the nba at all or no not so much i mean march madness is on right now i actually i actually don't i you know what the weird thing is when i moved to america i stopped playing and i stopped watching really Yeah, wow.

It was weird.

Like, I just got, I got so heavily into, you know, I was just working with the adult stuff, you know, and didn't really have a connection to like play any pickup games.

And I didn't really have time to commit to it because the schedule is just so erratic.

Like, you never know when you're going to be working.

So I couldn't really, like, lock anything in particular.

So it was just like, okay, gym, things like CrossFit or whatever.

That makes sense.

Yeah.

Have you shot with Lily Phillips yet?

I have not.

No, I had Bonnie Blue message me, but I think she wanted to, but Bonnie Blue, Bonnie Blue wanted to be like interviewer for like YouTube and stuff.

This is actually pre that magic.

Pre-thousand, the magic.

The big the thousand the the record breaker or whatever i think look i i i kind of

i don't know if there was like a guinness world record guy in the room yeah when both of those girls are doing their thing i just i doubt the logistics you don't you don't think i thought i have i have i have my suspicions about the logistics of like actually okay well let's let's have this conversation yeah what counts as having sex

is it the dick in is that it is it does he has to does the guy have to finish is it does a hand job count does a blow job count right?

Right.

So, like, if she's getting through, like, where is she setting the benchmark for what counts as like having been with the dude?

You know what I mean?

For me, I interpreted it as they finished.

That's,

and I think most guys would make that interpretation, right?

But I don't think that was the case.

That'd be very hard to do in a day.

A thousand different guys.

That's precisely the point.

Yeah.

A hundred, maybe, if you're really freaking good, which they probably are.

They got a lot of experience, but a thousand.

You'd be surprised.

You'd be surprised, bro.

I have had some, I've been with some porn sars and their, their blowjob game is trash.

Wow.

Like, like,

it's, it's disappointing.

Yeah.

Uh, it's not a case.

Like, that's a misconception.

Like, and I'm not trying to shit on porn stars.

Like, a lot of them are, like, they're fantastic lady.

Like, they're lovely ladies.

Like, for all, like, the things that guys online want to, like, you know, shit on porn stars and they're degenerate and they're, you know,

maybe setting a bad example and stuff.

Cool.

They're maybe, you could say they're misguided, but you couldn't, I wouldn't say that, well, I would not call them bad people like they're lovely ladies.

Yeah, and some of them they predominantly like work for the camera like everything's for the camera, you know, like so all this like it's a it's a show job not a blow job.

Yeah, you know what I mean?

It's about the angle, right?

It's about like the performance and how it looks doesn't necessarily mean it feels like a 10 out of 10, you know.

I've had like civilian girls who give way better head than a bunch of porn stars I've been with.

That makes sense.

Yeah, I think what's that's that old saying?

Don't ever meet your uh your heroes.

Yeah, I've heard that, you know, so if

you're like an average dude and you're like, you think, oh, I get this opportunity to go sleep with so-and-so

in a gangbang or whatever,

it's probably going to be very average.

Damn.

I'm just telling you.

Have you slept with a fan?

Not a fan, no.

But I've worked with a few girls who when I was like 18, they were 18 and they were in porn.

And so I like, when I was 18, I fapped to them.

Okay.

And I ended up working with them like 12 years later.

And was it disappointing?

Two out of the three were great.

Okay.

And the third one was a disappointment.

Yeah.

That's not bad.

It's not bad.

Yeah.

But I had the disappointing one first.

And so I was like, oh, man, are they all going to be like this?

I think when you put people on a pedestal, no matter what they do, you just have this idea of them.

You can never reach that.

No, no, no.

Yeah, completely.

Yeah.

No one ever lives up to your expectations.

And it's kind of funny, like being friends with a lot of like...

big influencers, like guys like you, guys like Justin Baller.

You know the Tates.

I've hung out the Tates and stuff before, like Myron Gaines, Special Fit, these guys.

It's like everyone's, they're just, everyone's

people.

Everyone's a person.

It's like, no one has like, you know, magical mind reading abilities or anything like that.

There's nothing, there's nothing ostensibly different about them.

They're still human beings.

Yeah.

But it's kind of funny the way that people will get like, you know, intimidated by a guy.

You know, and they'll like, you'll see it, like they go up and shake his hand and they're shaking and stuff like that.

And I remember thinking, like, was there ever a time when I kind of felt like that for for like a celebrity?

And I can only think back to like, I met like a famous author once that I was a big fan of.

And I remember shaking his hand and I was like, kind of, you know, intimidated by him.

And that was when I was like probably 14.

Yeah.

And since then, I'm like, you know what?

As an as a grown man, as an adult, I don't think.

I don't think so.

There's a lot of respect when that happens.

Well, yeah, definitely.

If you're trying to make an impression on somebody, if you want to network with a guy like that,

easiest way to stand out is to not be intimidated by them, right?

Treat him like a goddamn human being.

It's the the easiest way to not pedestalize them.

It's like it's, you know, people might think that, like, you know, by putting them on a pedestal, kissing their ass,

you know, bending over backwards to do things for them would make you stand out.

It's actually the complete opposite.

Yep.

If their first question is, can I get a photo?

I already know it's not the respect.

I'm not saying no.

I never say no to that.

I won't deny it, but I know that it's, you know.

Yeah, it's interesting.

To be fair, like,

yeah, there's, it's, it's, it's hit and miss sometimes when i when it's very rare that a guy comes up to me and can like and i'm not you know i'm like mr big shawl yeah but can like offer some kind of value you know versus him wanting some value in return exactly oh i can handle your social media marketing that guys fail already bro i've been doing this for a while like if i want someone for that position i just i make a post on social media and then i see who comes and hits me up you know what i mean yeah i don't like i get hit up by a lot of like

email marketers social media marketers video editors, like every day.

Editors for days from day.

Every day, every day, every day.

And it's like, okay, if you're that guy that's your position, I know you're

trying to get your foot in the door.

Cool.

I'm probably not the guy that's going to give you your start.

Just being honest, or a guy like you, because we're a bit too far ahead.

Find the guys that are kind of just starting out.

They're just learning the ropes.

Those are the guys you're going to have a much better chance with and prove yourself.

Yeah, you need a track record.

Now, when I hire editors, I ask, who have you worked for?

Yeah, precisely.

You know, Yeah.

Because

I'm paying well these days.

And like, if you don't have a good track record, I need views.

I need results.

I don't want shitty quality clips from India or something.

Yeah.

A lot of my team, like, I end up getting them from like other creators.

Yeah.

Other guys in my network.

100%.

Like, hey, do you know, do you know someone who's available now?

Do you know someone who you're not working with anymore, but you know, they were great.

Like, that's most of my hires.

Exactly.

Come for that.

I went through your Twitter.

I wanted to talk about a few brilliant tweets.

My tweet's my Twitter spicy.

Yeah, you've been popping off.

You tweeted out good things come to those who wait is shit advice.

It's trash advice.

Bro,

what are you waiting for?

Like, no one's, no, the world ain't waiting for you.

Of course it's shit advice.

Like,

we heard that all the time as kids.

It's like, I think it was trying to encourage kids to be like patient.

And yeah, you should be patient, but you can be patient whilst actually working.

Like, good things actually come when you do, when you take consistent daily actions.

Right.

That's the only way you're going to get good stuff.

You know, like that whole, I think that,

I remember,

you remember The Secret?

You remember that that book the movie right yeah like a doc it was like a movie about itself it was also a book and they talked about like manifesting stuff my sister got into that and i'm like

sis no like no like you're not going to manifest your dream car like you have to actually like go and like do some research price it out but get a car loan put some work he's not going to he's not going to imagine shop at your door that's the first step Yeah, like people treat that as the whole process, manifesting.

The first step is to visualize and manifest, but then actually work for it.

Completely.

Like there, there is a, there is like a point to manifestation.

And I, I do it.

Like I always like visualize and picture like where I want to be with a goal or the action steps I'm taking.

Or like if I'm, if I'm going to be speaking on stage, I'm visualizing myself speaking on stage like weeks before the event or something like that.

Right.

But I'm not, that, that's not the only prep that I'm doing.

Like I'm actually writing a speech.

You know, I'm actually going over it.

I'm making sure my notes are there.

Like there's more to it than just like woo-woo and wishful thinking.

Absolutely.

Most guys guys suck at fingering.

They do suck at fingering.

You need to take some notes from lesbians.

Lesbians know what they're doing.

You notice how my nails are always cut?

All trimmed.

Yeah.

Nails are trimmed, bro.

Like, they're always like that.

You know, gunk on your nails, bro.

It's like you're just asking to give.

You're asking to give her a UTI.

That's a turnoff for you.

If you got like gunk on your nails.

And women, you don't think women pick up on this shit?

Like, women, how many times, is an honest question.

How many times have you ever actually paid attention to the shoes a woman's wearing?

I don't.

Correct.

No straight man does.

However, I guarantee every woman you've ever been out on a date with has checked out your shoes.

And she's probably checked out the shoes of every single woman in the restaurant that you've been to.

Wow.

Right.

So you don't think she's also checking your fingernails?

Like little, little subtle things like that?

Because

she's thinking steps ahead.

You know what I mean?

Yeah.

But then in terms of fingering, like, dudes think it's fingering as like finger blasting, like

you're fucking her with your finger as if it's like a small penis.

That's not what you're, that's not really the point of fingering.

Like there's different spots inside the vaginal walls, which are very sensitive spots.

Obviously, you've got, everyone knows about the G spot, but you've got like a bit further back, you've got the A spot and the O spot, but around the cervix and stuff.

You can

get in there and manipulate with your fingers these spots.

It's actually really, really, it's kind of like the ultimate female biohack.

If you can get to the back of the cervix, like underneath and or on top of the cervix,

you can literally do the come hither on the same on these sort of spots at the back of the vagina which literally trigger the muscles that happen when she naturally orgasms no way so you're actually biohacking an orgasm out of her she can't she won't be able to actually help it Now you have to make sure you get the spot right.

And if you've got big hands, it can be quite difficult to do this.

So you need, it's actually better if you're a smaller guy.

This is like, you know, everyone talks about women loving height.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Height tends to come with bigger hands.

it does so if you're actually a short king this is your like secret trick okay you might have smaller hands you can get them a bit deeper back and do a little bit of come hither stuff underneath the cervix band if you watch just watch her body language just pay attention to it you'll that'll tell you if you do if you're in the right spot okay that'll do everything for you damn but you can literally like trigger an orgasm from that because you're stimulating the same muscles that spasm when she has those contractions you're just hacking it wow it's nuts i've never been back there that's bro it's fun you got to put me on to that Try it.

Damn.

Instant orgasm trigger, huh?

It's like within like 30 seconds.

Because most guys can't make their girls finish from fingering.

No.

Well, because

they're doing like finger blasts and some shit like a teenager.

Everyone's still using the same sex advice that they heard when they were like 16.

Yeah.

From like Cosmo magazine, which is all trash.

The ABCs.

Bro,

that shit pisses me off.

Oh, like spell the alphabet on her clitoris.

Are you fucking ridiculous?

Imagine, like, put yourself in like

switch roles for a second, right?

If a chick was going down on you, right?

And she just changed what she was doing every five fucking seconds.

Yeah.

And like one, like maybe she gets to the letter S to Sean.

And you're like, yes, that's the one.

And then she moves on.

And you're like, no, go back to like what you were doing.

Like, that's kind of what you're doing when you're spelling the alphabet on her clip.

100%.

Just like, look, the secret to like the clit is if you're looking straight down the barrel, shall we say?

Yeah.

It's about one o'clock.

The sweet spot for 90% of women is like one o'clock on the, on the vaginal clock.

Interesting.

If I'm looking at your logo here, actually, it's like it's actually perfect.

It's just to the right of your head as I'm looking at it.

That's funny.

But one o'clock is that like that sweet spot.

That's where you kind of want to pay most of attention.

And obviously, we tease and we build up.

We don't go straight for the clitter.

It's like, if you want to warm things up, guys, like a bit of subtlety, a bit of nuance, have fun with it.

A lot of, like, speaking of Twitter, I see it's it's

guaranteed twitter engagement make a comment about like going guys going down on women yeah like guarantee you'll you'll divide the internet this is something i never expected to see ever is like there's a whole camp of dudes on twitter who think that going down on a woman um women in women interpret it as like supplicative, submissive behavior.

And my argument to that is like,

don't do things if you don't want to do them.

Like, if you're a guy and you don't enjoy going down on your chick, don't do it.

Yeah.

Simple as that.

Like, you should only be doing it

for the love of the game.

Simple as that.

If you enjoy

getting your woman off that way, cool.

Don't listen to autistic spurges on the internet.

If you aren't into it, then don't do it.

It's that simple.

It's that simple.

I think a lot of people

take internet advice too seriously.

And it's predominantly from anonymous accounts as well.

Yeah.

On Twitter, yeah.

When you think about it, like the amount of anonym, it's kind of crazy.

The amount of anon accounts on Twitter with actual like pull is pretty, is pretty impressive.

It's a good thing and a bad thing because it's a good thing because it allows you to anony, like, Twitter's crazy, right?

Think about it.

Like any person on earth can directly comment on and talk to, effectively, the most powerful people on Earth, like Elon Musk.

You can literally...

tweet him or comment under something he says and he might see it.

He might and not only that, you might out-ratio him.

It's happened exactly.

It's right, he's been out-ratio before.

Yeah, so Twitter is the only place on earth you can do that.

It's like it's kind of democratized, if you want to call it democratized, like yeah, influence.

Yeah, it's really Twitter's fun.

You never know what you'll see on Twitter.

It's fun.

That's why I like it.

People say it's toxic, and it's

which is correct.

It is, yeah.

It is a bit toxic and stuff, but yeah, I don't know, ride the tiger, man.

You gotta, you gotta enjoy that.

You gotta have fun with it.

You can't take it too seriously.

Completely.

Yeah, if you take Twitter seriously, you'll be like in a depressive black hole.

Absolutely.

So I looked at the stats because this was curious, like of male virgins, right?

In their 20s, and it's, there's conflicting stuff, but I'm seeing around 30 to 40%.

That's what I've seen.

Yeah.

Yeah, that's super high, right?

I feel like in your, when you were coming up, it was much lower.

Yeah, everyone, like, you know, everyone, everyone

had a girlfriend.

Yeah.

Like, not everyone, but like, it was easier to, easier to get a girlfriend.

And I think, you know what, I, you know what I think it was?

Women

looks matched

you know like if she wasn't she was like if she was mid

she would date a guy who's mid right now you got a lot of mids thinking they deserve a celebrity thinking they deserve an athlete thinking they deserve a rapper thinking they deserve a dude who makes 300k a year whatever like they're their

their worldview their expectations are vastly different to what reality is and that's because we have a globalized dating marketplace.

Like, you know, the girl in

Ohio, if she's pretty, she's the prettiest girl in her town.

She can jump on Instagram, take a few flashy photos, and then she's probably going to end up in the feed of some celebrity somewhere.

And you might like a photo, might DM her every now and then.

Obviously, that doesn't happen every time,

but

she is going to get a...

a warped perception of how attractive she is.

You know, have you ever heard the expression like,

you know, she's like, she's like a Middle American, like 10, but she's like a Miami six.

Yeah.

You know, it's kind of like that, you know, and so that's that's what we've created.

I think

if I was like universal dictator of the world tomorrow, and I could snap my fingers and change something, if I want, if I, if someone came to me and said, how do you fix that problem?

How do you fix like what you could call the male loneliness epidemic, the, the con, the, the Pareto distribution of

men and women dating, right?

How do we reset this thing to get things back to like a more equitable, normal, like healthy area?

I think the solution is you would have to delete Instagram.

Like the app would have to go

and you would have to outlaw women having phones with cameras.

Wow.

But think about this for a second.

Every, like women turn every social media app into a dating app because what do they do?

You give them, in fact, they sexualize themselves on every social media account, given enough time.

You give, like, not every woman, obviously, but a lot of them end up doing this you give them a phone with a camera on it and they take photos they put those photos everywhere they do it on twitter they do it on facebook they do it on snapchat they do it on instagram they do it on youtube they do it everywhere where all when you give women the internet and you give them a camera they eventually just end up sexualizing themselves now not they don't all turn into like only fans models or or go down even further and become porn stars and escorts stuff like that obviously but they sexualize themselves a lot you look at the average woman's Instagram account, there's going to be a bikini pick in there somewhere.

There's going to be like her posing in a certain way to show off her ass.

Or if she's got titties, she's going to be showing her titties.

You know, like she's showing the cleavage off in a certain way.

They know how to take photos and they know how to take photos that sexualize themselves.

So, you know, you can, you can, you could say that what I just said is a bit, a bit controversial, but it's, it's true.

They sexualize themselves no matter what.

Yeah.

So I think the only, if you really wanted to like fix it like that, that would be the solution.

It would probably help.

It would work, you know, but uh we're never gonna do that yeah it's not realistic

not realistic precisely it's not realistic so we're we're in this we've opened up a can of worms we're in this weird scenario now where the average guy has to work a lot harder a lot lot harder to have dating options than he used than than one generation ago two generations ago i heard the apps are rough these days the dating apps i mean tid is like mostly bots anyway yeah a lot i know a lot of guys who not a lot I know a handful of guys who run like OF management agencies.

Yeah.

And they just use, they run bots on the Tinder to get people to their OnlyFans.

Yeah, I've heard.

You know, so like

it's and then the next dating app comes along and that dies.

Like bumble is like trash now.

Hinge was hot.

I don't know if it still is.

Hinge was good.

Like last year, like the last two years, I'd had a lot of success on Hinge.

Now it feels like it's dying.

You know, there might be something like, what's the next dating app going to be?

It's going to be called going outside.

Actually going out and talking talking to people in real life did you ever get on raya i've never even heard of that it's an exclusive one okay yeah you need a social media following oh really yeah yeah but i don't want to date a girl with a social media following that's true you know that'd be tough like i i feel like that's that's like the that's a bad exchange like that's a a win for the chick because she gets access to a dude who's like got a big following right but i don't want a girl who's got you know tens of thousands of followers like thirsting up in her dm yeah why would i want that yeah you want a low-key chat i want a i want a girl who's like off the radar radar, if anything.

Yeah.

You know, I'm the, I'm like, I don't want both of our lives to be broadcast everywhere.

Yeah.

Public relationships never work out.

Or they're just, they're just so susceptible to attack.

Right.

Because think about it.

If everyone knows that that's your chick,

that's the first target they're going after.

Like, if you say something controversial in the internet, you have an opinion people don't like, first thing they're going to do is they're going to go through your chick's past and they're going to try and use it against you.

Look at exactly what happened with Paul, the Logan Paul file.

I was going to bring that up.

Exactly what happened.

But cool.

And everyone was like, you know, clapping the other guy on.

What was his name?

Fuck, I forgot his name.

Was it the Dylan Dennis?

Dylan Dennis.

Yeah.

Everyone was cheering him on because he's like, you know, because people like to hate on Logan Paul.

Yeah.

But it's like, that can happen to anybody with a woman with a big social media following.

Right.

Do you care a lot about your partner's past?

Yeah, I mean, it's

the number doesn't matter as much as people would think.

I don't think the actual objective number, and also she's never going to tell you the number.

Yeah, they're going to lie about it.

Like, look at the what did we say before about the whole Lily Phillips gangbang thing, right?

Yeah.

How many of them actually put the dick in?

How many of them ejaculated inside of her versus hand jobs and blowjobs, right?

Guarantee you, when a girl tells you her body count, she ain't talking about blowjobs.

No.

Fucking guaranteed it.

Definitely not.

Guarantee it.

And then you go a step further.

Are you talking about making out?

Definitely not.

Definitely not.

They will never count that.

But if i was like taking things into consideration like that that is important you know what i mean so you're never going to get the real number okay

what is a better indicator i think is like how does she follow your lead does she follow your like instructions

even though her she gets she she might not feel like doing it right it's basically a test of it's like a measure of like you might call that loyalty you might call that submission call it whatever you want.

But it's like, look, how much crap are you going to give me as we as I just try to steer this ship in this direction?

Pretty much, like, just trust me.

I know what I'm doing.

I've got a plan.

We're going this way.

Hop on board.

You know, and it's like, I think if you're

because you'll get the same woman, will give two guy, two totally different guys, a very different version of herself, you know, like

the average, average Joe over here, like she might

start to like really test him and really push, like be naggy, like try to get away with bullshit, like, you know,

go out and party with her girlfriends and stuff, you know?

But then she gets with a guy over here who like has some balls, has sets boundaries, like has a lot of self-esteem, knows what he wants and knows what he's willing to accept.

And more importantly, he's willing to walk away if she if she doesn't.

like step into line.

Oh, magically all of a sudden, she's, she's staying at home.

Magically, she doesn't, she doesn't want a girl's nights out anymore.

Or magically all of a sudden, she ain't nagging as much anymore oh now she's decided to like cook and clean and iron his clothes and shit like you can get two different men will produce the a very different outcome from the same woman that's true you know so i think like the the number itself yeah it's a good indicator but you're never going to know what it actually is and a better indicator of like

where you measure up relative to the other guys in her past is how well she behaves with you.

I think that's a good test.

Are you traditional when it comes to finances?

Do you want your girl working at all?

God, no.

No, no.

I made my last girl quit her job.

Wow.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Because

I can handle it.

It's not that hard.

Yeah.

Now, I'm lucky.

I have a above-average income and things like that.

But I think

I also don't

really try to provide a super lavish lifestyle.

Like, we'll go on holiday.

I'll take her on holidays.

We'll go do some cool shit.

But that's all.

I already want to do that.

Yeah.

Or I'm already doing that.

You know, if i'm coming out on a to vegas and a podcast i'll call we're going to vegas like it's already part of my lifestyle anyway

rather than me try like i'm not running around buying her a birken i'm not running around like you know taking her shopping all the time and stuff like that and i think a lot of girls They need to, for a woman, if a woman wants to have that like stay-at-home lifestyle, I think a lot of women do.

I think a lot more women would actually be perfectly happy being a stay-at-home wife and mother than having to go through the goddamn rat race.

Like how, honestly, God, how many women actually want to spend an hour a day in traffic commuting to work and then another hour at the end of the day coming home?

How many actually want to do that?

I'd say fucking none, honestly.

But

because like the dating problem, like the dating, this whole thing we're talking about, it's actually an economic problem.

If the money wasn't funny, right?

If we, if it wasn't inflated to all hell and printed at whim, then it would actually be worth something.

And you might actually be able to provide for a family on a one-income household like two generations three generations ago were able to right you know like a single a regular average job could afford a home and afford a wife and afford a family of kids and a car and all this stuff good luck doing that now hell no right so it's actually an economic problem that like women are

and it's like

Guys in America especially talk about like American women being like really masculine, right?

Yeah.

Well, that's a byproduct of the situation we're in.

Like when you feel threatened, when you're like stressed about paying your mortgage, like women, like if a woman's in that situation, she has to be more masculine to handle it, to deal with it.

So it's a result.

It's all downstream from having shit money, honestly.

That's a good point.

People don't talk about this leading to dating issues, but it's 100% true.

Cause if you look at other countries that aren't dealing with economic problems, the women are still feminine.

Or even like, maybe they've got, maybe their economy isn't where ours is

but like the relative standard like stand the standard of living that is expected is nowhere near as high right like america's had it great for a long time so the standard of that there that is expected is much higher you know you go to maybe somewhere in south america where the standard is not as high but maybe they might be a little bit and don't be wrong i know i know south latin latin american women fuck around i know i know this those latinos but they can they can also be quite catholic in their you know and and yeah

a little more you would say on average, a lot more traditional than some of the party girls you might find in a city like Vegas or a city like Miami or whatever.

Yeah.

Well, Miami is mostly Latinos anyway.

I would never date a girl in Miami.

Fuck that.

Yeah,

Miami's interesting.

There's a reason I left.

I bet.

Yeah, it was, it's not, you're not going to find a, you're not going to find a wife.

You're not finding a wife either.

Yeah, it is unfortunate.

It's a lot of fun.

I see a lot of guys get attracted to that.

that lifestyle.

I'm very much over that.

Like, I don't.

It's a phase.

I don't want to live in an apartment, bro.

I want to touch graphs.

You know, I want want to see mountains.

I don't want to see like, I don't know, whatever you see.

Like, just,

I'm not even a big beach guy, to be perfectly honest, which is ironic because I've lived in nothing but cities with beaches.

Literally, like Marbea, Miami, Los Angeles, Perth, all beach cities.

Wow.

And I don't, I'm not even that.

I don't like the beach that much.

You got to get out in the countryside or something.

Yeah, I need to, give me trees, bro.

Just give me, give me trees.

Give me a home among the gum trees, bro.

I actually asked a guest which country he thought had the best woman.

And he said Romania.

Yeah, Romanian women are pretty good.

I've dated a Romanian girl before.

Very true.

What I find, I think a lot of American guys will fall into this trap of

assuming that Eastern European girls are like this special snowflake.

They are gorgeous.

Don't get me wrong.

They're very gorgeous.

They know how to dress really well.

They dress in a very feminine way.

They,

you know, they are a lot more traditionally feminine.

but they do expect you to provide financially.

That is a certainty.

And I think a lot of, if an American dude who is a bit ignorant goes wife hunting in like,

I mean, not, you can't do Ukraine now, but I know guys who were doing, going to Ukraine before the war and stuff, Romania, Poland, like Russians, these kind of girls, you better be ready to like

pay financially.

You ain't splitting bills.

Their father's going to beat your ass if not.

And the dad will kick your ass.

Yeah, there's that.

That's because that's the, that's the, the dads are super masculine.

So you've got to compete with that.

Like if you're not, if you, if you are just, you know, a bit pussyfooted and you don't put your foot, if you, literally, if you don't put your foot down, they will walk all over you and they'll leave you.

Like they want you and expect you to be a lot more like, you know, not heavy-handed, but like straight down the line masculine in that sense and have have boundaries and not compromise on them.

You know?

That makes sense.

That's what the dad's like.

Yeah.

You said earlier you wanted kids.

Has that changed recently?

I definitely want kids.

Yeah.

I think the first time you came on, you you didn't, right?

Yeah, it definitely changed my opinion on that.

So in the past,

I've seen a couple of close friends

have a couple of kids over the last two, three years.

Yeah.

Bro, it's the just watching them with their kids.

It's the most beautiful fucking thing ever.

And especially like watching the way that their kids

look up to dad.

Yeah.

It's, oh, man, like, nothing will melt your heart like that.

It's beautiful.

That's cool.

Like my friend Justin Waller, no one is ever going to say, like, I'm not going to, you know,

don't want to reveal too much about his private life, but he is an amazing father.

I bet.

And the way his daughters look up to him, man, that's what every guy wants.

Every guy wants that level of love from his family.

I don't care who you are.

That's what you want.

I'm glad you changed your stance, man, because you were affirmed before.

I remember the first episode.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Let's go, baby.

But you don't believe in marriage.

People could change.

Yeah,

I still think legal marriage is flawed.

Yeah.

I don't have a problem with getting like, like, doing a religious ceremony.

I think that's fine.

But getting the government involved in it is, it's just, man, if, and I know, but we're, we're at like the lowest rates of marriage in recorded history, I think.

I think so, yeah.

Right now.

And the highest divorce rate, too.

And the highest divorce rates.

Well, it's like,

what are you incentivizing?

Well, think about the way that, you know, divorce courts are structured.

Think about the way child support court is structured.

It's literally a, it's all one financial incentive for the woman to leave the guy.

So if you want to fix marriage, you're going to have to fix these laws first because the more, thanks to social media, thanks to big podcasts and stuff, a lot of more guys are waking up, right?

More younger guys, especially are waking up.

And the guys who are get the end, the dudes who are, who are older and who have been through that racket are coming out and be like, yo, like they're very, very

anti-marriage.

Like you think I'm anti-marriage.

Talk to a guy who's been divorced.

Yeah.

You know?

And.

You aren't going to reverse that trend.

You can spatter all you like and say, men need to step up.

That doesn't change the laws.

Like your moral high ground doesn't change the fact that the guy is going to lose half his shit if she just has a bad day.

Yeah.

You know, so you need to change.

You need to fix that.

You need to fix like the

child support, child custody laws.

That definitely needs to be fixed.

A lot of good fathers are kept from their kids, from a vindictive mother.

Yeah.

I think the mother wins like over 80%.

Yeah.

So it's like, look, they can't all be deadbeat dads.

Yeah.

They can't all be.

Should be closer.

Logically, it just should be closer to 50-50, if it makes sense.

Precisely.

You know, we,

do I know what the exact answer to this fix to this problem is?

I don't.

But having the conversation is at least a way to find it.

Yeah.

You know, if we just sit there and pretend like, oh, nothing's wrong,

nothing's ever going to change and no one's ever going to come up with a better solution.

But the way we have it right now is definitely not the way to go.

Absolutely.

Sterling, what's next for you?

Where can people find you?

I know you're debating Jake Shields later today.

I can't wait to see that.

Talking to Jake about it.

Yeah, yeah.

We'll talk about some stats and stuff with the porn industry, which should be fun.

Yeah.

Yeah, I've got that today.

And then I might go check out some amateur boxing going on tomorrow at Luxembourg.

Okay, I might go check that out.

Michael Sartain from Cox.

He's not boxing.

He is not boxing.

He is hosting it.

Okay.

So I might go check that out.

But I'm off to Dubai and then I'm back to Australia.

Good old Dubai.

I got to get out there.

It's good fun.

I haven't been yet.

If you, if when you go, hit me up.

I'll connect you with a bunch of people.

Oh, yeah.

Thanks, bro.

Thanks for coming on again.

Thank you for so much.

Yeah, check them out, guys.

See you next time.

Peace.