The Dark Web, Drug Lords, and My Path to Redemption I Tommy Haden DSH #475

How that addiction led to you going to prison.

How much time do we got here?

30 minutes.

Let's get it going.

Okay.

I got to become a really good drug addict.

I was never like the broke guy on the streets.

I would just get really close with drug king pins, drug queen pins.

And one of the drug queen pins, she, long story short, wanted to, I think she really liked me.

Then at one point, she threatened to kill my family.

She said, I'm going to shoot up your whole house.

I'm going to shoot up your whole family.

And this is somebody that could actually do that.

Anybody that's had their family threatened, at least for me, I instantly turned rage.

I was ready to die die that night.

I'm like, hey, you're going to have to kill me.

Like, you are not killing my family.

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All right.

You're about to learn about the ins and outs of the prison world today, my friends, and the lessons that Tommy has learned.

Tommy Hayden is here today.

How's it going, man?

Man, it's going fantastic.

We love the win, and we're winning, baby.

So

we're glad to be here.

I love that.

Win's my favorite hotel here.

Yeah.

So you ended up at ASU?

I went to Arizona State.

Party school.

Is that why you went there?

That's exactly why I went there.

I almost did the same.

Yeah, and that was my major was partying.

Yeah.

You know, I was in a fraternity and,

you know, living the life.

Every day was a party.

And I think that's what kind of segued into me getting stuck on opiates.

Because

it's all fun and games until you start getting hooked on drugs.

So it kind of evolved from alcohol to Xanax to opiates.

Exactly.

I had done every other drug and never really had a problem with it.

But the opiates, once you do those, first of all, like for anybody who hasn't done it, you feel like Superman.

You feel like the most confident,

amazing, like fulfilled person ever.

It just gives you that feeling.

Like I was walking up to chicks, saying whatever I wanted.

I was jumping on stage.

Just you feel invincible.

Wow.

And so having that feeling is what hooks you.

And so you're always just chasing that feeling.

Yeah.

So how long were you on those?

Most of my life.

So since Arizona State, and when they first, when I first was out there, they weren't like, it wasn't like it is now where everybody knows they're a bad thing.

We're like, hey, these are from a doctor.

It's just a pill.

It's no big deal.

Right.

But then my friends started dying, like really well-to-do kids, literally lost seven or eight guys just in one semester.

Damn.

Yeah.

Part of like your fraternity brothers?

Yeah.

That's a lot.

It's a ton.

And since then, even more.

I'd say like 30 of my friends have died from this stuff.

Holy crap.

It's crazy.

I'm really lucky to be here.

And every day is a blessing.

The fact that I'm standing here, I've almost died a couple of times too, is just, it's all a bonus.

Right.

And so I've taken that, I've taken that and taken it into like, now I have a second chance to do something better.

And I'm hoping that I can turn this whole mess of a life that I've had into my message.

Yeah, powerful.

So walk me through how that addiction led to you going to prison.

How much time do we got here?

30 minutes.

Let's get it it going.

Okay.

So long story short, yeah, it started with the pain pills and eventually that turned into

because the pain pills after you stop getting prescriptions are so expensive.

That turned into

and I got to become a really good drug addict.

I was never like the broke guy on the streets.

I would just get really close with drug king pins, drug queen pins.

And one of the drug queen pins, she

Long story short, wanted to, I think she really liked me, but she was like 300 pounds, probably 6'2.

She was huge, linebacker.

And

when she realized I wasn't really like, I was kind of flirting with her because she had the drugs.

But when she realized I didn't really like her, she stopped paying me because I was selling drugs for her online.

Got it.

And,

you know, that we just had some disagreements.

Then at one point, she threatened to kill my family.

She said, I'm going to shoot up your whole house.

I'm going to shoot up your whole family.

And this is somebody that could actually do that.

And anybody that's had their family threatened, at least for me, I instantly turned rage.

I was ready to die that night.

I'm like, hey, you're going to have to kill me.

Like, you are not killing my family.

And so that night, I was like, hey, I'm either going to kill her or she's going to kill me because I'm not going to let my family die.

And again, I'm hyped up on all on every drug under the sun at this point.

So we went to her door, kicked the door down.

I only had a fake gun.

Like most of the stuff I ever did, you know, when I was running around like an idiot was with fake guns.

And I went in there, removed her of her real guns.

We ended up taking her drugs, all this stuff.

I threatened her.

I'm like, hey, if you ever talk about my family, I will kill you.

And again, I'm not like a gangster guy at all, but when somebody threatens your family, it was like, have you ever seen where, like, if a child's baby is in danger, they're like 12 times stronger?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

That's how I felt.

Yes.

That's how I felt that day because I was in so enraged that she would even say that.

And knowing that that's possible, I felt like I could just walk through bullets that day.

I was ready to just, you know,

yeah.

And

so I never in a million years, since she was a drug queenpin, thought she would call the cops.

So she ended up saying that I

armed robbery, assault with GBI, got all these really bad charges.

and that led to me getting arrested.

Talk about the, I'll tell you another really quick story.

So, so once I got arrested, again, I'm hooked on opiates.

My biggest fear was going through withdrawals.

I don't know if you know anybody who's had to go through opiate withdrawals.

I went through Xanax withdrawal.

Oh, gosh.

Yeah, those are.

I had a seizure.

It was terrible.

Yeah, those are horrible.

Yeah.

And so coming off of, yeah, Xanax, opiates, all this stuff was already a big fear of mine, but doing it in jail was the biggest fear of mine.

And so I realized that my biggest fear that day was going to come true.

I was going to have to to withdraw from Xanax, from opiates while in jail.

So once I got locked up, I was so delusional.

I had kind of like pulled some pictures off of the, off of this guy's wall because I didn't know what was going on.

He was Aryan Brotherhood.

They beat the crap out of me the first day I was there.

Damn.

The next day, I wake up to go to court at four in the morning.

They say court bodies at four in the morning.

They drag you down to the buses.

You have to kind of like chain up with some, somebody.

And they're all yelling at this bum that's in front of us.

They're like, you're making fun of him because he kind of smells.

Once we get on the bus, they're still talking crap.

I felt kind of bad for this bum.

As soon as the bus stopped at the courthouse, I stood up and I felt something go down my leg.

And I realized that smell was me.

No way.

Yes.

You yourself?

I s myself.

Because you're so worried.

Because I was so sick.

Oh, wow.

I was so sick from the opiate withdrawals.

And so talk about your lowest moment of your life, that happening, and then everybody on the bus realizing it was me and just pissed off.

I finally get into the holding cell right before I go up to court, and there's seven brothers in there and just me, and they're just laying into me, talking crap to me because I smell.

I get up, I'm like, hey, homie, you want the ones?

Like, like, I was ready to fight this guy just because he was talking crap and I was just having the worst day of my life.

All seven of them stood up and I'm like, wow, I'm about to get my kicked right now.

So I was like, bro, I'm just having a really bad day.

I'm withdrawing.

I sat back down.

I go upstairs to see the judge and the lawyer.

And he's like, hey, it's not looking good, Tommy.

You're facing 12 years.

And at that moment, Sean,

something in my body left, like like a piece of my spirit left, and I just felt, I've never felt so empty and sick in my entire life.

I'm like 12 years.

I thought my life was over.

Yeah.

How old were you at this point?

I was

probably 30.

Wow.

So these are like your prime years.

These are like prime years.

Yeah.

So it's like I've been stuck on drugs since since college and

have had issues, like I said, for about a 15-year period.

And so right around age 30, could have been 31, is when I was facing 12 years, which thank God I didn't end up having to serve.

Yeah.

How much time did you end up serving?

A year.

Oh, that's it?

I got really lucky.

Wow.

Yeah.

That's impressive.

So the lady that told on me, she was selling drugs to everybody.

And basically, she sold fentanyl to a person and that person touched a baby and the infant died.

And so while I was awaiting, I was going through a few weeks of thinking I'm doing 12 years.

And then they told me that she's no longer a credible witness because she's going to prison for life.

Whoa.

And so that saved my.

They gave me a plea deal of one year i was trying to fight it i'm like hey can't i just get out of this completely but he's like dude just take the one year and um and thank god otherwise i'd still be in in jail or prison today that's insane and that one year how tough was that because you your roommate was a uh a hell's angel right on a murder charge yes so did you get along with him i did uh you know yeah he had a body in a barrel charge and everything in there is gangs like even if you're not in a gang if you go in they're gonna ask hey are you with the wood pile are you with the blacks are you with the mexicans like who do you affiliate with And I'm like, hey, I'm not in a game, but they're like, well, you have to go somewhere.

I'm like, well, I'm white.

And so, yeah, they ended up putting me in the cell with a Hells Angel who, again, was a really nice guy at the end of the day, but he's in there for torture, kidnap, and murder.

And most of the guys in there, since I had a violent crime, I wasn't with the low power.

I was with the high power guys that were in there for violence, for murder,

you know, for serious offenses.

Right.

You know, and I'm a frat guy from ASU that has never been to jail, just like, you know, the most fresh fish you could possibly imagine.

imagine yeah they probably picked at you right at first uh a little bit um more so they made me put in work so if somebody does something to disrespect like like there's so many weird unwritten rules so if I walk through a brother's tables that I'm not supposed to like literally just pass by the wrong area yeah that's an offense and then they're the leader of the of those guys will go to the leader of the whites and say hey your guy disrespected us and then two of the white guys will come and jump you damn and so I got jumped several times because there's all these weird rules you can't stand up to pee There's all these weird rules that you just can't stand up.

You can't stand up and pee in your cell.

Why?

Because their whole thing is, is since there's three people crammed in like the size of a bathroom that they don't want, like since they sit on that, they don't want any like mess or any pee like going outside of the toilet.

So they want you to sit down to pee.

Damn.

I know.

There's a lot of weird little like unwritten rules in there.

Interesting.

And when they send the guys to get to jump you, are you allowed to fight back?

Yeah.

Oh, you are?

Yeah, you are.

And so the first time I was so sick, I didn't care.

The second time, like, I've done Muay Thai and Jiu-Jitsu, like, for a good part of my life.

Yeah.

I I did a pretty good job, but it's like, when it's two-on-one, it's really hard to, even if you're good at fighting, to like be able to win.

Right.

You know, and they probably have shanks and stuff.

Yeah.

So, so I didn't, luckily, yeah, I never got a knife pulled on me.

It was more just like they call it disciplinary.

And so you're either doing, if it's a light infraction, you're doing some kind of workouts, like 123 burpees, and then you're sounding off.

I'll be like, like, oh, this is Tommy Hayden at Cell 109 sounding off for disciplinary action.

And then I'll be like, thank you.

No way.

If you have to do like push-ups for something, if it's like a lighter infraction.

Yeah.

But it's all in there because, you know, everybody's trying to protect each other.

So it's like the group of the whites, if something happens, they got to keep it within the whites, the blacks, versus because if I were to just fight a black guy, it would be, everyone would jump in.

It would be a riot.

Right.

And did you have access to drugs in jail or by then you were sober?

No, there was access to drugs in jail.

And you were still doing it or no?

Yeah, I was.

Any chance I had, I mean, I was still doing it.

So you didn't get sober until after?

I didn't get sober even when I got out.

So the day I got picked up after this year, year the guy that i was with offered me uh some some fentanyl which i was like dude really and and my my dad did it damn i know after all that you would think that would be enough right

um not to mention while i was in there that that lady that had threatened my parents life had burned my dad's house down what she burned my dad's house down holy crap yeah to the ground luckily he wasn't in it but um

But yeah, you know, and he didn't really want to tell me because he's like, when he gets out, he really will go kill her for this.

You messed with somebody's family.

All bets are off.

Yeah.

So did you feel a sense of guilt that that was because of you?

Oh my gosh, I still do.

Yeah.

Wow.

So, so much.

So much so.

And it's just like, and that's the thing is being hooked on drugs is such a selfish way to live.

All you can do is think about yourself.

All you can do is think about your next fix.

You just, you live like

existence.

But you're so caught up in it and you feel like you can't stop because if you stop, you get sick.

So yeah, man, it's just now today it's like I'm taking that addictive energy and putting it I'm getting addicted to good things yeah so it's like I'm not really a big fan of AA I know it works for some people but you know I'm into affirmations I know you're like talking about manifestation

so every time you go to those meetings they say you have to get up and say hey I'm Tommy I'm an addict and it's like I want to say hey I'm Tommy I'm doing the most I'm a winner I'm a multi-million dollar earner I don't want to get up and say hey I'm Tommy I'm a drug addict every every single day I feel like that's just like reaffirming yeah I agree with that I didn't know that's what they did there but yeah you want to tell yourself positive positive affirmations.

Yeah.

You know,

how aware were your parents of your issues with all this?

Pro, extremely aware.

Okay.

Yeah, they knew what was going on.

You know, I tried to hide it, but it's really hard to hide when you go to lunch with your dad and you're in the bathroom every five minutes smoking

drugs.

Right.

You know, damn.

So you were really addicted.

I was really addicted.

And you wouldn't be able to tell just from looking at me.

I don't look like I was hooked on drugs for 15 years.

I'm not sure why.

I think it was because I never, I wasn't the guy who stayed up for three or four nights in a row.

I would still sleep every night.

Got it.

Wow.

Yeah.

So that moment when you finally came sober, was it a specific incident that happened?

It was.

So after I got out of jail, yeah, I was hooked, was still, was up to my old ways, doing dumb again, selling drugs.

And I actually actually took a macro dose of psilocybin, like mushrooms.

And this is the most craziest trip I've ever seen because it was like I was in two, all of a sudden I was in two different dimensions or two different realities.

One of them was me getting dragged off to prison, my mom crying, all this bad stuff happened.

And that was basically, I could tell that that was going to happen if I kept down this path.

And then the other one, for whatever reason, I was on stage with Wiz Khalifa like singing next to him, which I don't know where that came from, but that seemed like a lot better of a path than the other one.

Wow.

And so that day I went and threw everything away I had.

Like I threw away all my drugs, like pounds.

I threw away phones that had cryptocurrency on them.

I just tossed everything because I didn't know when.

I knew that the cops were probably watching me and I didn't know how long I had.

So I just chucked everything that day.

Were you dealing at that point?

Yeah.

Yeah.

I was.

Anytime, anytime anybody's using hard drugs, if they have any money, it's because they're selling drugs.

Right.

Because that's how you can fund your habit, right?

Exactly.

Yeah.

Because any other job would fire you because you can never be on time to anything.

It's just, it's, it's an absolute mess.

Wow.

That's crazy.

So you actually had crypto on the phone, though?

Oh, yeah.

I had a bunch of crypto because I was selling it online.

Wow.

Yeah.

Oh, see, dude, yeah.

So if you kept all that, that'd be worth a ton or not.

That's a ton.

Because I used to buy like fakes with crypto like 10 years ago when I was in high school.

Yeah.

And if i kept it it'd be worth like hundreds of thousands but you said oh you said you bought fakes fake ids oh yeah okay with bitcoin okay yeah and then you just you just lost that bitcoin wallet uh no i'm saying if i just held the bitcoin oh got it yeah he only took bitcoin because he was like overseas i guess oh yeah yeah oh yeah yeah most of those guys doing shady stuff only take bitcoin or monero because that's harder to trace yeah Are you interested in coming on the digital social hour podcast as a guest?

We'll click the application link below in the description of this video.

We are always looking for cool stories, cool entrepreneurs to talk to about business and life.

Click the application link below and here's the episode guys.

So you were selling it on the dark web?

I was selling it on the dark web.

Wow.

I've been on that site.

Yeah.

Silk Road, right?

Yeah, Silk Road.

I mean, that's long gone, but there's always a new one.

One gets shut down, three more open up.

The cops actually run most of those sites now.

I don't know that.

They used to always just shut them down, but now it's like it's making them so much money that

they keep them up and they just will bust a few people a week instead of just them shutting it down and then looking for the next one they'll just take control of the server take control of the accounts and then just bust people all day with that smart yeah the the category that always sketched me out on the dark web was um the hitman you could hire a hitman for like 10 20 g's yeah and i remember seeing that as a college kid like wow my life is worth 10 grand yeah isn't that scary it is but um but in my experience all of those listings are just like undercovers oh they are yeah so none of them, like, at least from everything I've heard, there's no actual real hitman posting on there.

Oh, it's just undercovers, and there's people getting caught up all day because they'll try to hire a hitman, and then it'll be an FBI agent that, you know, just gets all the evidence, and then you're screwed.

Wow.

Are you still micro-dosing psilocybin to this stuff?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I do it every week.

Yeah.

Do you?

I actually brought you guys a couple.

Oh, hell yeah.

Dude, it's actually elevated my.

Thanks so much.

It's elevated my business and my mindset.

These are cool.

Yeah.

Nice.

Yeah, I'm a big fan, man.

I've done some full doses too, like the one you did.

Yeah.

But it's been like eight years.

I'm a little scared to do a full dose.

Yeah, yeah.

You got to be in the right mindset.

You do.

And even if you like over micro-dose, it's like too much.

I just do it, like you were saying, a little bit to where you just feel that little extra pip in your step.

Yeah.

But not too much to where you're like tripping out.

Yeah.

I do 0.25 max.

Okay.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Do you still talk to anyone from prison?

Yeah, I do.

I still put money on people's books that are still in there.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah.

Wow.

That Hells Angels guy I was telling you about, he, long story short, had helped me out.

These, these other guys, other white guys wanted to jump me because I went into a brother's cell, which again, I didn't know I wasn't allowed to do.

I went into a brother's cell and they were going to jump me for that.

But since that guy kind of ran the whole jail, they asked him first and he's like, no, he's good.

So he saved me from getting jumped.

Wow.

And so ever since then, I've been putting money on his books.

He's going to get out now in a couple of weeks.

Nice.

And I'm going to try to get him a job, a solar job, you know?

Yeah, I want to dive into the solar stuff, how you got into that, how you're making millions with that.

Yeah.

So doing really well.

I mean, anybody that is doing door-to-door sales, I give them a lot of credit because it's the hardest job in the world.

So you start off knocking on people's door.

And

in any other industry, I don't know how much you make, but if you can get one sale a day, your average commission is about five grand.

I've had some that are like 30 grand on a residential.

Five grand a month?

No, five grand per sale.

Per sale?

Per sale.

So some of these kids are doing a sit.

Some of these kids, like I was just talking to our team in Reno, are doing one sale a day.

So they're making $150K a month.

A month.

Holy crap.

And that's why the opportunity is so amazing because you can get out.

Like I just hired a guy who was on the streets a few months ago and within the first two months, he made 30 grand, but it didn't come natural to him.

He's not like a you know, like a talker.

He's not somebody who's got a lot of confidence.

So he's had to work a lot harder.

But even that, he was on the streets and he's been making 15 grand a month.

Damn.

And that's amazing from homeless to being able to make 15 grand in the first couple months.

That's why I really want to get the message out there that if you have nothing, not everybody can just start their own business because you have to have the discipline, right?

You gotta, you gotta know what you're doing.

With this, you just have to show up with a good attitude.

We get you trained, uh, we put you with winners.

We're waking up early, we all go to the gym together, we all write down our goals, and then we get to work.

Incredible, yeah, you built a solid company culture, yeah.

And this is based in Reno, uh, Reno, yeah, nice, but you live in San Diego, correct, okay, so you hop back and forth.

So, we're in 31 different states, we're all over the place.

Uh, it's it's legacy power, so, um, so yeah, we're all over the place, we can install everywhere, and uh, typically, the other cool thing is we do 15 days on, 15 days off.

So, we'll fly out to, let's say, Florida for 15 days, work our asses off.

But in those 15 days, you're going to make more money than you would at your regular job in the next three months.

Wow.

As long as you do it right.

That's awesome.

Yeah.

My energy bill out here, bro, is like $800 a month.

So I'm thinking about getting solar, honestly.

Let's go.

I mean, it's so much money, and it keeps going up.

Nevada is one of the highest in the country, I believe.

It is.

It's one of the highest in the nation.

And the cool thing about it is what we do is we just take that 800 that you're spending and redirect it into into the solar.

So it's no money up front.

Like you don't, you don't give us any money down.

We install the solar.

You still haven't paid us a dime.

And then 60 days later would be your first payment of maybe 600, but it'll never go up.

Instead of just throwing the money away to your current energy company, we just redirect that money that you were going to spend into the solar.

And it's less, it's clean, and you get tax credits.

Smart.

I love that.

There's a couple Instagram clips I thought were interesting.

I wanted to bring up.

One of them was, you said, if you get stabbed in jail, if you are arrested for peeing on the side of the road.

Yeah.

So there's something called bad charges in jail.

And

anything with kids is a bad charge.

Any type of like weirdo stuff is a bad charge, especially with kids.

That's the biggest one.

If you tell on somebody, so if you have snitching on your record, that's a bad charge.

Indecent exposure, for whatever reason, is a bad charge.

Even if there's no kids around, if you're just peeing on the side of the road and a cop sees you and you end up going to jail and they put you in general population, the first thing they're going to do is get you on the payphone.

You can call to check your charges and the Aryan guy is going to take the phone and listen to your charges.

Wow.

And so all it will tell them is indecent exposure and that's to them, that's a bad charge and they will either stab you or remove you.

Damn.

Yeah.

That's interesting.

So as soon as you get there, they're checking what you're in there for.

They're checking your paperwork immediately.

Wow.

And so you're either blue ban mainline or you're yellow ban, which is protective custody PC.

So any like celebrities are in PC, any child molesters are in PC, anybody who's been snitching is in PC because they can't be with mainline.

Otherwise, you know, they'd be getting killed daily.

Did you ever spend time in isolation?

So I did briefly.

You know, I had one nurse ask me after a few weeks, like they always, they do checks.

They're like, hey, are you thinking about killing yourself?

I'm like, hey, it sucks here.

Yeah, I want to jump off that tier every day.

But I was joking kind of, I was joking.

I'm like, I want to jump off that tier.

And she looked at the guard and she's like, he said it.

I'm like, I'm like, dude, I'm kidding.

And so they hemmed me up, grabbed me, put me to another room, took all my clothes, put like this yellow, I'm sorry, green quilt on me, and then put me in a room with literally nothing because, because they put you in a room to where you can't kill yourself.

So they don't give you any sheets, anything.

You just have this stupid quilt.

They serve your food on a paper tray with a paper spork.

Wow.

You know, that goes bad after two bites.

Yeah.

And so, yeah, I was there for a couple of days.

And then the psychiatrist came by and I was like, please, like, I was joking about that.

Please put me back into the regular jail.

Dude, I know people that have been in the hole for months, weeks, some even like six months.

And it's actually like, I think it's worse for the person than better, in my opinion.

I mean, you go crazy in there.

Yeah.

Yeah.

You have to run programs.

So anytime you're in any, even just in regular jail, we'll wake up.

We'll have like a routine.

A lot of it's working out.

A lot of it's reading.

So it's like once you get down a program, it becomes a little bit easier.

But there's nothing like a feeling like me and you are so used to being on the, you know, get up, walk around, do whatever we want.

Once you're in a cage, that feeling of not being able to move, not being able to get out of there, not being able to to like sometimes scratch if you're if they have chains on you you can't like scratch your head damn it's just like the most degrading and the worst feeling i'd never wish it upon anybody being locked in a cage that's terrible how many hours of the day were you inside the actual cage part uh

gosh i i think we only got out for probably three hours a day that's it yeah damn so you're in that room 21 hours yeah That's awful.

I thought during the day you guys have jobs and you walk around and stuff and there's yard time.

Yeah.

So just to be clear, I was in jail.

I never went to prison.

So I did a year in jail which arguably you know is worse because yeah you don't have jobs there's like a lot less stuff there's less options so i was stuck in jail for a year um and they let me serve my time there so i didn't actually have to go to prison got it so the so the difference is jail is for short term jail is for short term i've heard of people doing up to three years they call it state local uh and then prison's like a little bit more if you're going to be there for for a longer time or just Sometimes it depends on the crime.

Sometimes it depends what your lawyer is trying to get you.

But

that makes sense.

you said jail was one of the best experiences you ever had yeah it was so so there's a lot of things i think in life that people feel like why is this happening to me what am i doing you know when i was in there i wanted to cry i didn't because i didn't want anybody else to see but i just wanted to cry every single day um

but in hindsight i needed to go through that i wake up every day sean's so stoked just to have a pillow it's impossible for me to have a bad day They don't give you pillows in jail.

Wow.

So you just get like a little thin mat.

You get like a little sheet, and then that's it.

You can maybe like roll up your pants, but it's just, it's so uncomfortable.

So I had like neck issues for the first couple of weeks.

And

yeah, so now every day I wake up, I'm so glad that I have a pillow.

And that's why it was the best experience because it's impossible for me to have a bad day out here.

Incredible.

Even when clients cancel, if I lose 20 or 30 grand that day because of somebody canceling or whatever the reason is, I'm like, hey, this is a good problem.

And I'll talk to the guy, my buddy Derek, who's still in jail.

And that kind of grounds me.

Anytime I hear what he's doing, I'm like, dude, I thought I had a problem out here.

I'm just so glad that i'm not in there right it's all perspective right it really is because you look at some of the problems like that you complain about and you're like wow there's people dealing with way worse exactly yeah there's people that would kill to have your guys's problems they would love to have your problems yeah exactly um so where are you at now with the company and your future plans and what do you want to do in the next few years yeah so i'm trying to to take this mess like i said this mess that i've had turn it into my message and recruit more guys so building a team like selling solar is great you can make a lot of money doing that you could even make seven figures just on the selling part.

But now that I'm growing a team, I have guys that are out knocking on doors for me.

They're setting appointments.

I'm closing the deal or I have somebody else go and close the deal.

And then that's making me money.

So growing a bigger team, trying to recruit more guys, I really like helping people that are addicts.

Because like we were saying before, I can take that addictive energy and instead of putting it towards drugs and Jay, they're really good drug addicts.

They're really good alcoholics.

I can take that energy and put it towards something positive.

Put it towards working hard, put it towards waking up early, put it towards reading books.

And if I can get that addictive energy focused in the right place, it seems like the addicts do the best at this job.

Yeah, I would say I have an addictive personality.

I used to be a huge PC gamer, never channeled it towards drugs, but it's definitely a benefit if you could figure out how to channel it, like you're saying.

Yeah.

Yeah.

You said you got stuck on Xanax, though, right?

Yeah, that was only a month or two.

Okay.

But it was more so they prescribed it and I just took it every day and then it turned into an addiction, I guess.

Yeah.

It wasn't like I was like doing it for fun.

Yeah.

I was they prescribed an anxiety and stuff.

So yeah.

They give you something to when you got off of it, did they give you something to help with the?

No, I had the so I ran out, had a seizure while I was high on

so it was like so bad.

I haven't smoked since.

Yeah, I gave up completely.

I used to smoke every day.

Yeah.

But yeah, what's the trick to channeling the energy, you'd say, from addiction to bad things to good things?

What's the trick?

So just using that energy.

So I think for me, the trick is like every night before bed, I don't write down just what I'm going to do the next day.

I write down who I'm going to be, how I'm going to feel when I wake up.

So I'm writing down like, hey, I'm going to wake up, have the best day.

I'm going to hit the gym.

I'm going to do some meditating.

I'm always looking at myself in the mirror for a couple minutes every single day and just convincing myself that I'm the man and have true belief.

There's a Napoleon Hill.

They call it the mirroring effect.

I don't know if you've like heard of anything like that.

I've heard of Napoleon Hill.

Yeah.

So he talks about a guy.

He was at a, long story short, he was at a party and the guy was, the host was really drunk and he watched the host go into his room and talked to himself for five minutes in the mirror, looking into his soul and was like you fool these people think you're drunk you're sober as a ghost basically talked himself into being sober and napoleon hill said he saw him sober up just from staring in the mirror for five minutes and telling his cells telling his atoms to be sober really and so ever since then i mean if you think about it we're all made up of atoms and energy right everything is is made up of atoms and energy and so if you can focus that and look into your own soul like uh that mirror mirror on the wall like fairy tale that has something to it yeah where you see like a demon or whatever if you've repeated three times yeah well i don't know about that part oh no there's i don't know what i'm thinking of then

there's one where you repeat some lines in the mirror you shut off the lights and then really

yeah oh my god so it could be used in both ways i guess yeah yeah i've never used it for evil i just use it to pump myself up um and and i need that maybe not everybody does but i need to constantly be working on personal development i saw you at uh what was the seminar was it was in utah limitless limitless yeah i saw you at limitless i go to those things all the time i think it's really important for that because if I'm not constantly keeping myself busy with getting better, keeping myself busy with going to those things, surrounding myself with people like you, people like that want to grow, then it's easy to fall back into the addiction and fall back into the alcohol.

It's so easy to get comfortable.

Yeah.

That's why I'm always trying to put myself in uncomfortable situations, even though obviously you don't want to be there.

But like you got to surround yourself with people doing 5, 10x better than you, you know?

Exactly.

See what's out there.

Yeah.

And the times I look back at my life where I was kind of stagnant, it's because I wasn't going out of the house.

I wasn't leaving.

I wasn't experimenting new opportunities.

And is that kind of why you chose this?

Is because you're around?

Yeah, now I'm meeting amazing people.

A lot of my perspectives have changed on different topics the past year, and my business has skyrocketed, honestly, learning from eight, nine, 10-figure guys.

Yeah.

Grant Cardone's coming on this week.

Oh, really?

Yeah.

I would have never had the opportunity to sit down with someone like that for an hour if I didn't have the podcast.

Dude, I love Grant Cardone, bro, so much.

I have a Grant Cardone tattoo.

That's how much.

Yeah, because

he's been through some struggles.

Yeah, you're going to laugh at this.

So, not only do I have a Grant Cardone tattoo, but

one of my employees is a tattoo artist.

And I was talking about going on your show.

And he's like, what do you want to get?

I'm like, hey, maybe I'll get the, I was kind of, I was kidding.

I said, maybe I'll get the Sean Mike Kelly tattoo.

And basically, everybody on my team was like, you won't do it.

And so, so, not only do I have a Grant Cardone tattoo, but it's like, I let him do a digital.

Holy crap.

Dude, that is dope.

Wow.

You know, that's, that's GC.

I got some different quotes from Eric Thomas and stuff, but I was like, you know, he was, it was, I tagged you in it, but it was in our living room.

We had,

you know, it was just one of those things that it came and I was like, hey, why not?

You know, so.

Wow, dude, I love your mentality.

And that mentality, like you said, if channeled in the right way, that determination, that grit, man, you're going to make it far.

I can tell.

Yeah, I appreciate that, man.

I think I'm like at the beginning, it's just the beginning here.

Like I said, I've only been clean for, gosh, three and a half years.

Wow.

And so

it's all taken off.

Everything's going really well.

But definitely look out for me in the next next couple of years here and your message is something that needs to be heard i mean we have an opioid problem right now in our country

so bad you need to be speaking on stages man at colleges at high schools like you can be changing thousands of lives for sure i appreciate that yeah i've been trying to i've talked to a couple like like at-risk youth places and some other like um some meeting like a meetings things like that talked to them about a little bit but it's definitely something i want to do more of yeah i still take stay in touch with all of my friends who passed away all their moms wow because i can't imagine what they're you know dealing with Yeah, you said 30 friends.

Dude, 30 of them.

That's crazy, man.

At least, maybe even more.

And I mean, this is all the way, obviously, from college up until now.

We just lost one a couple of months ago that was near and dear.

And these are successful guys that have really good families, that have an awesome future, awesome careers.

But unfortunately, you can do a little bit of that stuff and it can kill you.

Yeah.

You do.

Man, Tommy, it's been such an inspiring episode.

Where can people find you and learn more about you?

Yes, sir.

It's at whatever it takes, Tommy, my friend.

I even got it on the side.

I don't know if you can read it.

Oh, I love it.

At whatever it takes tommy and uh instagram reach out to me we're looking for more people we're looking for people that want to hustle if you want to make the most money in your life without having any money out of pocket hit me up we're doing the absolute most with the very least thank you sean for having me love it man we'll link all your stuff in the video thanks for coming on thanks for watching guys as always see you tomorrow dessert come on baby let's go boom