Getting Cheated On, Webcam Days & Standup Comedy | Lana Chairez DSH #276

Picked off podcast.

Yeah.

Being in that podcast and being around those people was like, oh my god.

What was he saying specifically that kind of irritated you?

Um, everything

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Got a quick one for you guys today.

I'm here with Lana Cherry's.

Hi guys.

How's it going?

Good.

Haven't seen you in a bit.

What you been up to since?

Well, I finally got hired at the studio.

That's a good thing.

Okay.

Last time I saw you, I was in, or the first time I met you, I was interning.

Yeah.

So I finally, now I'm official here.

Nice.

So what's your job title here?

I'm a producer.

Well, now I'm just an engineer, but I'm a producer, editor, engineer.

Nice.

And I know you do a bunch of stuff.

You do stand-up?

I do everything.

I'm a a stand-up comedian.

I'm a podcast host for Laughing with Lana.

And I shoot it here at the studio, too.

And

let's see, I work at the studio.

I own a business doing solar screens and interior doors.

And then what else do I do?

God,

kicked off podcast.

Yeah, I got kicked off a fresh and fit because my rans are a little bit more.

Damn, called out.

He basically, like, I called him out because I, basically, I, I, um, I lost my train of thought and he called me out on it.

So I apologized on the podcast.

And so when he lost his train of thought, I was like, hey, keep up.

I thought, like, I apologized for it.

So what's up?

And then he was like, you know what?

Just fing leave.

Just fing leave.

And I was like, so, because you couldn't argue with me.

Did part of you want to stay?

No.

You wanted out?

I was, I was honestly like so glad that I left because I was ready to smoke.

I was like.

Cigarettes are

no, no sickies, no sickies, no.

I smoke I'm not a fan of cigarettes.

I'm not a fan of cigarettes.

Like no offense to anybody who like smokes them, no offense.

But like I'm a I'm just I'm strictly a we smoker and being in that podcast and being around those people was like oh my god.

Like the conversational

the substance of the conversation is like really low quality.

It's low IQ.

Yeah, I was on a show with like similar to that one.

It had like six girls and like me and it was just low IQ combos.

combos it's very low IQ combos because I'm like I'm like a lot of the things that they say they think their opinions are fact

and I'm like an opinion and a statistic is not a fact there's a reason why they call it a statistical fact because it's a statistic it's not a solid fact what was he saying specifically that kind of irritated you um everything

Everything so do you think you just don't like him and you just

I just I don't like that quality like what is that that that that subject I don't like the red pill move

I don't like the red pill movement like cuz I've even told like Rolo and Michael like like I've met them in this studio I didn't like them in the beginning because of their content and I didn't even talk to them I was kind of like cold shoulder a little bit I just didn't even associate and then when Michael and Rolo when I when I was kind of like forced to associate because I was producing their show I was like you guys are so

nice in person like they're so sweet, super like they love women in person.

It's just like the podcast and the content is so red pill and like kind of like misogynistic and like very hatey women.

Yeah, I think some people, I'm not saying they do it, but they kind of put on a persona on social media.

Yeah, they do, yeah, they do a little bit, and that's why um, Myron doesn't put on a persona, he's that person in person, which I respect actually, yeah, if you could be yourself, true, very true.

But if that's you um person like if that's you in person and off camera like ew not your type yeah no he's just like not it and i don't know so what's your type you like uh successful successful guys or you like athletes i don't care you don't have a preference i just want a guy that's i want a guy that's gonna treat me nice and i can have fun with like i want a guy that that is gonna go to chuck e cheese with me like i said on that podcast yeah i was like they were laughing at me because i'm like i i really would go on a first date with a guy to Chuck E.

Cheese.

Don't sleep on Chuck E.

Cheese.

Bro, my point.

The pizza's bump.

Are you kidding me?

Oh my God.

Sponsor me.

Pizza.

So money doesn't play any role.

No.

Wow.

That's rare to hear.

I mean,

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and if it did I would have slept with half the people that walk into the studio it's not like I don't get hit on you know like like people come in here they want to play like Captain Savajo or like I don't know or They see like, oh, she's like this broke little, like, she needs me.

She's going to want me.

My Rolls-Royce is going to, it's definitely going to impress her.

And I'm like, I've been in a Rolls-Royce.

Talk about Jeremy?

Who's Jeremy?

You pulled up in the Rolls-Royce just now.

Who's that?

Oh, my God.

No.

No.

He's nice to me.

No.

No, but it's just, it's just, that's not going to impress me.

Yeah.

It's genuinely not.

Like, what impresses me is like how people treat other people,

how animals react to you, how kids react to you.

It's different.

Like my, my, what I, what I find in a per what I'm looking for in a person is more like spiritual than

financial.

That's cool to hear.

I've never heard that perspective.

But the animal thing is facts.

That's the thing.

This dude came to my house.

My dog's friendly with almost everyone.

He did not want to go near this dude.

That dude ended up being weird.

Like all this other crazy stuff.

Animals can see things that we do not.

Yeah.

That is a thing.

And I totally believe that.

So when, like, my cats, if you come over and my cats are all over you, I'm like, all right, cool.

Solid.

Good sign.

Solid, yeah.

But cats are actually more difficult than dogs.

Yes.

Because they're pickier.

Yeah.

But my cats are really friendly.

Okay.

They are friendly cats.

But if my cats are friendly and they still don't like you, I'm like,

yeah, that's a bad sign.

That's a deal breaker for me.

Yeah, it has to be.

Yeah, for sure.

And kids.

Kids got a good sense too, the younger they are.

Yeah, babies.

Babies have a good sense.

And I just feel like

maybe not how the kid reacts to them but like how they react to children is a huge thing because I love kids so if people are like not like if you if they don't like kids or they're just kind of like kids should be seen and not heard kind of deal.

I'm like I go to someone's house and I make friends with the kid before I make friends with the adult.

Like I'm like, oh my god, there's a kid in the house.

You got Barbies, bro.

Like I'm playing with the Power Ranger action figures too.

They don't got those no more.

Never mind.

Nah, I haven't seen those in a while.

I aged myself.

What do they play with now?

Like, Like, it's mostly digital, I feel like.

I know.

iPad, iPhone.

That's sad.

Yeah.

I don't see kids outdoors anymore.

I don't either.

And I live in a community where there's a lot of kids, but I don't see the kids playing outside at all.

There's like, there's this one kid who rides on a skateboard and he's probably like the only one I see outside.

It's a shame.

They used to be packed.

Every street used to have kids on them.

Yeah.

But I'm like,

I don't know, kids, I like kids, but then there's there's certain kids where you're like,

all right, I can see why people don't like kids.

You are the example of why people don't like kids.

You have kids right now?

I love kids.

But do you have them?

No.

Okay.

I wish I did.

I can't have babies.

Oh, really?

Yeah, no, she's broken.

Oh,

your whole life it was like that?

No, I got in a when I was like 19, and the

scarred my uterine wall, so it's yeah, I know.

Planned parenthood, don't go there for

guys.

Oh, man.

I, um,

it kind of me up, but it's not uh um

like it sucks but it's not gonna stop me kind of deal.

Like I accepted it and I'm like if I can't do in vitro then there's surrogate if I can do surrogate I'm just gonna buy a baby you can adopt yeah yeah I'm just gonna yeah there's other methods you is it considered okay this is a joke if it's not a joke it's a real question But like if you buy a kid and you buy a baby from like

another country,

is that slavery?

Nah.

How does that human trafficking?

Yeah, I don't know the exact details, but my cousin was bought from China or something.

I love that you say your cousin was bought or adopted, I guess.

But the thing, you got to be careful with adoptions because they don't disclose everything.

So she ended up having some like learning disabilities and stuff.

Are you serious?

Yeah.

You know what I saw?

I actually saw this.

I saw a short clip on Instagram that it was about the American adoption agencies going to like Africa and they go to Africa, I guess, claiming that they're going to help the mother like with medical needs, food, and stuff like that.

So they'll take the child and take them to the hospital and then the mother never sees their kid again.

Jeez.

And then the kid ends up being adopted into an American family.

And I'm like, can you imagine?

Like, you're in the middle of an adoption and then you find out that the mom never even wanted to give up her baby.

I don't know what the f ⁇ to do.

Yeah, that's wild.

That's wild as fuck.

I heard.

I just, I just, I saw that on Instagram.

Could be real, could be not, but I believe it.

I'm like, how is that not?

That's why I say like adoption is like human trafficking.

Yeah, I mean, that's a whole nother conversation.

Trafficking.

That's scary.

You did have a viral clip on your Instagram.

Yes, which one?

You said if you had the choice to be a boy or a girl, you would choose boy.

Why do you, why do you side with the guys here?

Um

because I just wish I had something to play with between my legs that wasn't a cl.

I just think like the it's the idea of having a

I feel like it is a very powerful thing that you guys don't think is powerful.

Like

when you sit there and you just hold your wiener, you don't feel powerful.

No, I just had on this guy that slaps his balls and he's kind of explaining this, but nah, I never done it.

I would okay, because I'm the type that like if I'm standing behind my boyfriend and I grab his wiener, I kind of close my eyes and just imagine that it's my own.

And I'm like, bro, it's like, it's powerful.

It's a powerful thing that you guys have.

I feel like you guys take it for granted because you guys just let it, you're used to it.

Me as a female, I'm like, it just, I feel like it's like a deadly hammer.

Okay, so you look at it from a sexual point of view.

I thought you meant more just like lifestyle.

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Oh no, girls have it easy.

Yeah.

Why would I do that?

They do have it easy, right?

Women have it.

I get hate for that, but I feel like they have it easier.

No, we do.

I don't.

You could get hate for that all you want, and it's because those are the women that get it easy, and they're the ones that don't want to admit that they get it easy.

But me personally, I like my life isn't hard.

I mean, it's not easy, but it's fing easy.

I could go on

and make a few hundred dollars if I wanted to.

I can FaceTime a guy for $100 because he wants to see my

guys can't really do that.

No.

And on top of that, like, I had the

you guys can't sit there and having a b, but then you guys get called deadbeat dads.

But if you're telling a girl, like, hey, I don't want to have this baby, please don't have this baby.

She has the baby anyway.

And now you're the father.

Now you're a deadbeat dad when you didn't want the baby, but she has every right to having a b with or without your permission.

I find that yeah, they do have the

control in that situation, right?

Yeah, they have the control in everything.

A lot of things.

A lot of things.

That's one thing that I do, the red pill movement that I do agree on is women have it easy.

And a lot of, like, I've heard a few

people like Pearl.

I forget her name.

Yeah, Pearl Davis.

Yeah, that girl.

She says something about like how

a lot of women's rights have to do with

a lot of women's rights have a lot to do with basically women being able to make mistakes

and we just get to cover it up like a

stuff like that.

But no, I'm telling you, yeah, no, I wouldn't I'd wanna be a guy just to have a wiener, but not be an actual guy, because no, you guys have it hard.

I would still choose guy just cause I feel like it's more fulfilling.

You think so?

How?

So?

Because you really work.

I mean, that's a general statement, but like, I just feel like I like providing for people.

Yeah.

You know what I mean?

I like that feeling.

I like, I'm a protector too.

I have a very masculine energy, even though I look feminine.

I have a very masculine energy in a sense of like, if I see, like, if someone was like, with you, I don't care how tall you are.

Like, my little chihuahua would stand in front of you and be like, no, like, this is my friend.

Like,

Sean's cool to me, so I'm going to fight you.

For, like, I'm very protective, very, like, I don't know if that's masculine per se, but I'm could be.

Have you been in a fight before?

Yeah, damn,

drunk or at the bar.

No, no,

okay, so

I went to jail.

I was sober as and I went to jail because um, I ended up uh,

I my brother.

Whoa, yeah, this escalated quickly.

A Mexican homie.

No, it was, it was in self-defense, but uh, my brother, my brother's addicted to alcohol, so he got, he got a little fed up and he can't remember.

And honestly, like, he, I, I believe him, and he says that he doesn't remember anything, but he was, he went as far as to, like, he attacked everyone in the family, like physically.

Yeah, and I got between every single person.

Like, he tried to get, he tried to get my dad.

I was throwing blows for my dad.

He tried to get my mom, and I was throwing blows for my mom.

And then I have a brother who's handicapped, he's wheelchair-bound, and he tried to get my brother.

And that's when I was like, You got me up.

Like, at this point, I'm tired.

I was like, I was beating everybody.

I was trying to save everybody.

And now I'm tired, bro.

Now I got weapons.

And that's when I like push came to shove.

And

I had to do what I had to do.

But so you s him in the neck?

No, I stopped.

Oh,

I st him in the chest.

Is he alive?

He's alive.

Okay.

Thank God.

No.

Thank the Lord he's a f ⁇ ing alive because I didn't.

I thought I was going to s ⁇ my brother in the arm.

Yeah.

I don't know if he moved.

Like, to be honest, all that's a blur.

But I just told him, I was like, if you hit me one more time, I'm going to s ⁇ you.

And he smack dabbed me right in the face twice.

And so I just like, you know, when he smacked me, I just...

Just went for it.

And I thought I was going to get him in the

like his arm or something.

I got him like smack dab in the middle.

And I thought, like for two hours i thought my brother i thought i had brother holy crap that's traumatizing it was

very much it was it was but we're okay today the family's okay my brother's alive my brother's out nice um my case got dropped because it was self-defense but my brother's like in a he's in a alcohol program so he's doing okay he's doing better so that's good yeah and the family's better you've had a roller coaster of a life i know you were a webcam girl at one point and you've told some crazy stories there Did that kind of traumatize you as well?

Yes, yes.

Oh my god, guys are perverts.

Maybe I don't want to be a guy.

Like,

you guys will pay for me to see you guys do weird.

I'm like, it's it's yeah, no.

Um, and that was pre-days.

You were doing it, yes, yes.

This was pre, pre-I, I became an all-I became a webcam girl, and the

I think the craziest story that I have is I saw a guy

in his own mouth and swallow it.

What?

What was the angle?

Was he oh, he, how do I, he kind of, he's on the floor.

I can't do it, but he's on the floor and he pulled one of these, but like he had his butt like way in the air, kind of like a yoga pose.

Like he yoga posed it.

Yeah.

So he was, he had his shoulders on the floor.

His back was up in the air, but his like was right in his face.

It was like out like this.

And he was

dg his

until he came in his own mouth.

He was like, like he could suck the tip and he was

and he was just sucking.

Wow, he's flexible.

Flexy, bro.

I never seen that before.

And then he came in his own mouth, juggled it in his mouth, showed it to me.

Did one of those

and then swallowed it.

And I was like,

what the f?

Like, yeah.

That's nasty.

It's hella nasty, but there's, there's, you know, what I noticed?

This is, I think this is another reason why I'm not really into guys that have like hella money because guys with hella money is willing to pay for like really weird sexual stuff that they've had, you know, like, and a lot of rich people are sexually weird.

I think because they experienced everything and they're looking for that next new thing, you know, and then it gets to the weird.

It gets to the weird stuff.

And I'm like, I've done a lot of in my life but there's a lot of things that i'm like i wouldn't i wouldn't do that yeah for sure i would yeah no so what are you excited about next what are you looking to promote what's next what's next for you oh well um

Next, actually this Sunday, I am going to be performing comedy with Jay Wasley at his Halloween party.

Oh, nice.

I'm so excited.

I know.

I didn't know he did comedy.

He doesn't, but he's having like a party.

Okay.

So he has like a few comedians coming, I think a few performers.

and then they're going to have like a costume contest and stuff.

So

I'm sure it's going to be fun.

I'm nervous as f.

I think you'll be good.

Everyone's in a good mood on Halloween.

Yeah.

So it should be a good audience.

I said, okay, I'm going to

talk about some ghost stories.

I'm going to talk about how my, my, I have a ghost.

His name's Frank.

Yeah.

I named him Frank for no reason, but

I just recently found out that my ghost is an Maya

that I had.

No way.

like 13 years ago what yeah this medium came in to um to to Bazaar Junkies for Austin's podcast yeah and I was I was engineering bizarre junkies and she was like there's a little boy in here she was like he's connected to you and she's like pointing at me behind the rig and she's like there's a little boy in here the energy I feel it she was like it's she was like it's connected to you and then after the show, we started talking.

The more we were talking, she was like, oh my God, it's your son.

And I was like,

That's funny because I don't have one, but I went.

So

that is crazy.

Yeah,

I did this in 15 minutes.

That is nuts.

So she was literally seeing a baby.

Yeah, like she saw, she said that he was about like, she was like, he looks like he's about like 10, like nine or 10 years old.

So I'm guessing, I don't know if he grew up or I don't know.

Yeah.

But, well, he, because, cause I, when I was, I'm guessing It's I don't know if he grew up with me or if he just has that 10 year old energy 11 year old energy cuz if I would have had my baby my baby would have been between 11 and 12 right now.

Oh since she was like so it grew up even though it died.

I guess that's trippy.

Yeah, I'm not I don't know how to explain that part.

Yeah, that's weird But she said that it was she was like there's something that like stays she was like it doesn't follow you it stays in you and that's what made me think of like well he never came out

he died before he came out technically it was like he was a vacuum dynamic damn that's wild well where can uh where can people find you you guys can find me at um at lana cherry's comedy on instagram and tick tock and

youtube you can find me at lana cherry's comedy but if you type in laughing with lana that's my podcast you guys can find me at laughing with lana hopefully i'll have sean kelly on my book let's do it there we go guys you heard it here digital social hour see you next time.