The First Wives Club, with Chelsea Davison
Tune in next week when our movie will be... The Running Man (1987)
Press play and read along
Transcript
Speaker 1 This is Free with Ads, the podcast that asked the question: why pay Netflix eight bucks a month to watch the hunting wives when you can go online for free and see wife-based entertainment that has dazzling comedic performances and a robust color palette with every hue of the rainbow, from beige to eggshell to chiffon to off-white to porcelain to alabaster.
Speaker 1 I'm Jordan Morris. And I'm Emily Fleming.
Speaker 1 Today's movie is the First Wives Club, the 1996 hit comedy starring Bette Midler, Goldie Hahn, and Diane Keaton, three slices of toast, turkey, bacon, lettuce, and tomato.
Speaker 1 With us, as always, is the super producer, the he freak Matt Lieb, hitting us with those drops that can have it all.
Speaker 1
I do have feelings. I'm an actress.
I have all of them.
Speaker 1 Gorgeous. So good.
Speaker 1 Today with us is a very special guest, an actor, a comedy writer, one of the hosts of the Rom-Com recap podcast, Podstruck, Chelsea davidson hi chelsea yeah hello
Speaker 1 oh what an honor to be here you guys i i love you both so much also matt i i love you too i just met you but wow and this is crazy
Speaker 1 but here's my number and call me
Speaker 1 chelsea you're you're our first wife we consider you all
Speaker 1 oh my god thank you i'm also my husband's first wife so you know hopefully last but we'll see
Speaker 1 uh we're gonna talk about the first Wives Club, which is, as of this recording, streaming free with ads. But first, we're going to get to know our amazing guest in a segment called Talk to Guest.
Speaker 1 Talk to Guest.
Speaker 1
So, Chelsea, in addition to all the other things that you do, you host Podstruck. You co-host Podstruck.
Yes. The Rom-Com Recap Podcast.
Speaker 1
We had a horror YouTuber on last week, and I asked him a similar question. Okay.
I'm sure there's going to be a lot of overlap between me and a horror fan. Yes.
Speaker 1 How do you feel about Giallo, the Italian splatter films of the 70s?
Speaker 1 So
Speaker 1 was Dawn of the Dead a metaphor for Carter era malaise? Talk about that.
Speaker 1 Anyway, so when if people ask you to recommend a rom-com, like, yes, you know, when Harry met Sally and, you know, You've Got Mail and Wishleep Us in Seattle. These are the big ones.
Speaker 1 What are the deep cuts for the singles?
Speaker 1 If you want a rom-com you've never seen,
Speaker 1 what do you recommend? Well, you know, I think that a lot of people know the classics, they know Moonstruck, they know, you know, the ones like that, they know all the Meg Ryan ones.
Speaker 1 So I would say there are actually some good rom-coms in recent years that people like to give a lot of guff saying, oh, no one's making good rom-coms anymore. And to that, I say you're wrong.
Speaker 1 I say they're making just a lot of slop, you know, every Christmas season for streaming.
Speaker 1 But if you wade through that and you don't, you know, you, you ignore that stuff, there are actually some really great ones on streaming. For example, I Want You Back on Amazon Prime.
Speaker 1 That one I really loved with Jenny Slate.
Speaker 1
Set It Up. That's Glenn Powell before he became Mr.
Hollywood. Oh, yeah.
Love Glenn Powell. Yeah.
Him and Zoe Deutsch. He was but a running boy, soon to become a running man.
A running man. Yes.
Speaker 1
And, you know, you watch it and you're like, hmm, this guy's got something. So, you know, it's fun.
There's a little story. You're like, this guy's got something.
He should be in every movie.
Speaker 1 Every movie forever. You want to see this guy in every movie.
Speaker 1
This guy's got something. I want to fuck him.
It's not that kind of it. Yeah.
Speaker 1
Probably something about him. And it's like, yeah, it's abs.
That's the thing. That's the thing about him.
There's something about this guy somewhere in the midsection. It's kind of an Abbey quality.
Speaker 1
I don't know. I'm just drawn right there.
There's just something about this guy. It's making my mouth water.
Speaker 1 We are recording this right as them holidays are about to start.
Speaker 1 Do you fuck with a Hallmark movie or the kind of more modern Netflix equivalent? Yes.
Speaker 1 In fact, I've gone pretty hard into the Netflix rom-com holiday verse with a Christmas prince and then the princess Switch.
Speaker 1 Then
Speaker 1
it's a really fun thing because they are both. in the same universe because one of them attends the other wedding.
Yes.
Speaker 1 But I'm sorry to repeat it, but it's just mind-blowing.
Speaker 1 But then in other of them, they are watching Netflix and scrolling and see their friends, these people that are real people from real countries in the movies. So what is real? Is this Black Mirror?
Speaker 1 This sounds like Black Mirror.
Speaker 1
I just, I love it. They're like, we'll have our cake and eat it too.
Who cares? It's both. I watch all of those as well with
Speaker 1 girlfriends, you know, Jenna and Laura. We do drinking games, and we are never more fucked up than watching those.
Speaker 1 And one of the take-a-drinks is when they mention the universe, when they mention other
Speaker 1 properties within it. And girl.
Speaker 1 Yeah, you're wasted. You're wasted.
Speaker 1 I'm God, you are because it doesn't make sense. One of my, okay, my worst holiday, maybe ever, like a, you know, holiday, holiday.
Speaker 1 One year I was in Thanksgiving alone in New York City and I was about to move to LA.
Speaker 1
And so all my stuff was packed. I didn't have anybody there with me.
It was like the night before my flight. And I was like, wait, I have a tab of acid in my freezer.
Speaker 1
I'm going to take it alone to my apartment on Thanksgiving. And you know what? This is going to be so fun.
I've done acid alone before.
Speaker 1
This time, I'm just going to have a holiday and watch the princess switch. And that was the first time.
And I must tell you, it was horrible. It was like, it was like
Speaker 1 a cage, a mental cage I could not escape from. So I will say that you want to be maybe a little drunk, but you don't want to get too fucked up watching these movies because you just have to be like,
Speaker 1 don't do heroin.
Speaker 1 I was like, what, what are humans? Like, what is emotion? What is switching? Is it our brains within our bodies? And what is the brain anyway? Is it also?
Speaker 1 It was Vanessa Hudgens being one of the most wealthy actresses or an actress at all is very interesting.
Speaker 1 Maggie Moo. Like, every time she did these accents, I was like,
Speaker 1
I want to take the skin off my face. Yeah.
Now imagine you're high out of your mind. Yeah.
And it's melting. Your face is melting.
I wouldn't recommend that.
Speaker 1
Well, can I say, like, I consider myself to be like, you know, kind of a bad girl a little bit. Yeah.
And I consider you to be like this put together, responsible, you're a mother and a wife.
Speaker 1
I have never done acid or anything like that by myself. That is insane behavior.
No, absolutely.
Speaker 1 No, because it's not. It's very like
Speaker 1 preppy intellectual who's like, time to explore my own mind and like write some poetry. It's awful.
Speaker 1 I do feel like you have a buttoned-up persona, but you've lived.
Speaker 1 I've lived. You've lived.
Speaker 1 You have.
Speaker 1
I'm very impressed. I don't think you could survive that, honestly.
Here's the thing, but I can't watch a horror movie. You're mentioning, what was it, Dawn of the Dead? The Evil Dead?
Speaker 1
One of the dead. I've never seen any of them.
I can't.
Speaker 1
The dead? Please, no. You know, you won't even listen to The Grateful Dead.
That's how scary you are.
Speaker 1 The songs are so long.
Speaker 1 What are the big debates in the world of rom-coms? Is there like a controversial movie? Is there
Speaker 1
a take. I have to call out when you came on.
Podstruck,
Speaker 1 it was for the About Time episode, which is Richard Curtis.
Speaker 1 And on that, you raised one of the great debates, which is, is the Richard Curtis movie, Love Actually, a great movie, a great rom-com that is worthy of being watched every year, or is it on par with the room?
Speaker 1
That's what you said. And uh, yeah, you voted on par with the room, my co-host voted on par with the room, which I was honestly betrayed by.
I really thought we had changed our mind.
Speaker 1 Gang up on this rom-com casual
Speaker 1
coming in and insulting one of our sacred. That's what I thought, but it turns out, no, she had not changed her mind.
And I was the one fool.
Speaker 1 When we had done that episode, we had Stephanie Beatriz on from Brooklyn 9-9, and she was also a big fan of it.
Speaker 1 And so I guess I had lulled myself into safety in numbers, thinking that, yeah, we made some really good points. Love actually is a really good movie.
Speaker 1 And then suddenly the tables were turned, and you guys were calling out, you know, the 9-11 of it all. And
Speaker 1
9-11 is a framing device for that movie. Cannot be said enough.
Are you kidding? I have not seen that movie in a long time. No, no, there's a lot.
There's a lot going on.
Speaker 1 The very obvious Monica Lewinsky parallels they're doing.
Speaker 1
There's a lot of things that you just go, yeah, maybe it wouldn't be your first thought for a romantic comedy about Christmas, but you know what? I'm here for it. I love it.
I do watch it every year.
Speaker 1
Personally, I thought there should have been more 9-11. Wow.
Yeah.
Speaker 1 Not enough movies have the balls to open with.
Speaker 1
Have you watched The Holiday for your podcast yet? Yes, we have. And dang it.
I'm so sorry.
Speaker 1
That one actually has elements that could be a horror movie because she's in the middle of nowhere, Camera Diaz, when she switches houses. She's in the middle of nowhere.
I know.
Speaker 1
The winter, it's snowy. A man is knocking at her door, being like, oh, my sister usually lives here.
Let me in. Yeah.
I'm wasted. And she just says, okay, come sleep here, strange man.
Speaker 1
She doesn't know this lady has a sister. Like, there's a different version of the holiday that is a movie I would never watch.
You put a burlap sack on that guy's head. And you got a stranger's movie.
Speaker 1
Yeah. Yeah, I watched it recently, and I feel very differently about it recently than I did in the past.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's also got some weird stuff.
Speaker 1 And also, yeah, one of the rom-coms in it is very well served, you know, the Cameron DS side. And then they're like, and also stupid
Speaker 1
Kate Winslitz in it and Jack Black. And they get that.
I like that side better. I can see they just don't give it anything.
There's like no chemistry.
Speaker 1
The whole plot is her helping an old man. It's like, what the hell? But I like that part about it.
But I think they have more chemistry than the Jude Law, Cameron Diaz, because I just
Speaker 1 think Jack Black or the old man.
Speaker 1 No, I think that her and Jack Black, I think, have a lot of chemistry personally. But yeah, I just think Cameron Diaz is like a little stiff.
Speaker 1
Like, I don't know, but we'll get into that another day, I guess. Sure, sure, yeah.
No, but you're right. The moment where Jack Black grabs an eyelash off of Kate Winslet,
Speaker 1
that's hot. That is a hot.
As I've gotten older, and I think a lot of other girly pops and everybody in between,
Speaker 1 I think we see how hot he is now. Like, yeah, did we not back then? No,
Speaker 1 no.
Speaker 1 All right. Well, you know what?
Speaker 1
I think I always did. You were early.
You were early to the Jack Black is hot
Speaker 1
party. Say it early, say it often.
High fidelity is when he became hot. As soon as he's saying, let's get it on, you realize he could sing.
That's what did it for me. I was like,
Speaker 1 Let's not forget, I know.
Speaker 1
Let's not forget, I still know what you did last summer. Sure, sure.
He's great in that as well. Wait, really? He's in that? He is, yeah.
Speaker 1
He's like the he has like white guy dreadlocks, and he tries to sell everybody weed at this resort. He's great.
Wow, wow. Again, I will never see it.
Yeah, that's a that's a that's a spooky one.
Speaker 1 It is pretty spooky. There's a lot of people getting killed with a fish hook.
Speaker 1 Yeah, but I just don't want to see a movie where a person kills another person, and that's my requirement for video games, too.
Speaker 1 What
Speaker 1
kills that kills a person? That's fine. Hereditary, fine.
Things like that. It can be the devil.
It can be ghosts.
Speaker 1
It can be anything. The scariest movie of all time.
Is that though? Because it's kind of just like the real horror is trauma. Yeah, Tony Colette is sawing her own head off, not someone else's.
Speaker 1 That's true.
Speaker 1
The scariest movie I've ever seen is One Year for Halloween. My husband convinced me to watch Scream.
And I still think about it all the time. That Scream movie.
Speaker 1 Can you imagine that men can just kill you? They can just decide they want to kill you, and then they can do it.
Speaker 1 And there can be a guy, and then his friend can dress up in the same costume, and he can kill other people.
Speaker 1 Wow, just giving away the twist.
Speaker 1 Sorry, spoilers for Scroiler or Scream 1.
Speaker 1 I knew nothing about it going to be a bad thing. Wait till you hear about
Speaker 1 Chelsea.
Speaker 1
Truly, the beginning, it was like, oh, Drew Barrymore's in this. I didn't know that.
And then when she gets killed, I was like, what?
Speaker 1 Also, you can pop popcorn on a stove? Cool.
Speaker 1 Oh,
Speaker 1 she's got the Jiffy Pop. That's like the little thing that you put in.
Speaker 1
Anyway, you don't need Jiffy Pop. You can just use a pot, a regular pot.
You just have to shake it all the time. Anyway, that's a hot tip.
Speaker 1 Hot tip. We're talking about Scream, a movie, I believe, from 1996.
Speaker 1 Oh,
Speaker 1
the same as The First Wives? 1994? Anyway. No.
First Wives Club is 99. Just trying to switch.
Speaker 1
Just trying to switch. Oh, good.
It was good. I liked it.
Thank you. I think I know that First Wives Club is 96.
I think Scream is 96, but I could be wrong. It might be 94.
Speaker 1 Anyway, I'm a good host and I'm doing a good job. You are.
Speaker 1
We are here. Chelsea is here.
We're going to talk about the First Wives Club. We are very excited.
Speaker 1 But before we do, we want to let you know that this movie features suicide and mentions sexual assault.
Speaker 1 So, if that's not something you want to hear us talk about, we're going to play some music and give you a chance to find another episode.
Speaker 1
We're back. It's free with ads.
We're here with Chelsea Davidson from Podstruck. We're going to talk about the First Wives Club.
Speaker 1 Okay, before we talk about the plot, let's go around the horn, see who's seen this, see what our general feelings are going into the movie. I have
Speaker 1
a memory involving this movie that I will share before we start. But let's start with you, Chelsea.
You're our guest.
Speaker 1 I believe when I texted you about us watching this movie, your reaction was, I've been meaning to watch that again. So
Speaker 1 you're a fan.
Speaker 1 Well,
Speaker 1 yes.
Speaker 1
I remember I saw it a few years ago. I'm trying to think how many years ago.
You know, not when it came out,
Speaker 1
but I remember liking it and thinking, oh, it was fun. fun.
It was cute. It was kind of silly.
Speaker 1
And I feel like in recent years, I have seen so many women talk about how meaningful this movie is to them. Right.
And so I have been like, did I miss something? I should re-watch it.
Speaker 1 And then with the passing of Diane Keaton, obviously the gifs were shared plenty.
Speaker 1 The you don't owe me
Speaker 1
correct. There were a lot of things and quotes and all of these things and people wanting to re-watch it.
And I was one of them who said, you know what?
Speaker 1 This is the, this is the right time to go back, rewatch it, figure out what did I miss. And so,
Speaker 1
yeah, I'm excited to talk about it today. Oh, boy, not convinced.
Oh, boy. Emily.
Speaker 1 Emily, you seen this one? This is the first time for you? No, I've seen it a lot of times.
Speaker 1 And I actually,
Speaker 1 most recently, watched it in Chelsea's house while she wasn't there. Wait, so you need to watch it again?
Speaker 1 No, I just watched it like a couple weeks ago or like a week and a half ago when you know Diane Keaton had passed.
Speaker 1
Now I have to confess something. I had we should mention you were you were pet sitting for Chelsea.
Yeah, you just were just in my house.
Speaker 1 Yeah, I broke into Chelsea's house. This is why scream is so scary.
Speaker 1 No, no.
Speaker 1 So I had a friend over, Michaela, a friend of the podcast. I had her come over because we were both very sad and we ate pizza and watched First Wives Club and Father of of the Bride.
Speaker 1
And so, sorry, I had someone at your house, but she didn't sleep over. She left immediately after.
Thank God.
Speaker 1
Chelsea, look at your liquor bottles. Some of them have water added to them.
Well, they look like they were at the same levels.
Speaker 1
Okay, so I will say I had a little bit of your husband's rum that was like... It's fun.
And here's the thing. Your liquor, like your little bar back there caked in dust.
Speaker 1
Y'all don't even touch those things. No.
So I was like, I I don't think he's going to miss some of those. To busy doing acid.
Not at all.
Speaker 1 Well, and, you know, I have two kids, so it's like, you're pregnant, then you're breastfeeding, then you're pregnant again, then you're breastfeeding. It's like, when and when can I drink?
Speaker 1
That's true. But yeah, some of your Cap and Morgan, I may be dipped into there.
Oh, that's fine. All right, self.
Thanks. Matt, seen the movie, thoughts.
Seen it?
Speaker 1 Seen it, saw it in theaters with the fam. Loved it then.
Speaker 1
Theaters, like a re-release or in 96. In 96, baby.
We used to, you see, when I was very, very young, my dad took out the TVs because we were getting bad grades.
Speaker 1
And so to make up for the fact that we didn't have TV, he would take us to movies a lot. And so he took us to the First Wives Club.
And I was like, why, why, why?
Speaker 1
And then I watched it, and I was like, I love this movie. So whenever it was on TV, I would watch it then.
I think we rented it. Just one of those Matt Lieb weird favorites.
Speaker 1 And I confirm Scream is, in fact, from 1996. So my shop wave.
Speaker 1 Same year is so
Speaker 1
crazy that these came out the same year. Good.
Well, yeah, let's talk about what actually happens in the first wives club. We start out with a flashback to a college graduation, 1969.
Speaker 1 A very nice year.
Speaker 1 I'm good.
Speaker 1 And anyway, so this is the first wives club. They all went to college together.
Speaker 1 They're all drinking champagne, talking about graduation, and they say that they're going to be there for each other forever.
Speaker 1
And then we flash forward to one of the wives who won't be in the movie that long. She's drinking a lot.
She's wearing a fur coat. She's got a fabulous apartment.
Speaker 1 Lots of fabulous fur coats in this movie. Many furs, many lovely furs.
Speaker 1 And so she's drinking. We see these papers strewn around like tabloids talking about a real estate mogul who has a new wife.
Speaker 1 And we are led to believe that this woman was the first wife of this rich man who is off with a younger woman.
Speaker 1 She gives her jewels to her housekeeper and steps to the edge of her balcony.
Speaker 1 What happens? We'll learn later, but it's the thing you're afraid of.
Speaker 1 Anyway,
Speaker 1 so we go right to
Speaker 1 the first of the first wives. Diane Keaton,
Speaker 1 a legend, looking great, looking fabulous.
Speaker 1 House is looking fantastic. Yeah, I have not seen too many like late Diane Keaton movies, but the like houses and the like kitchen stuff, those were always like important parts of those movies.
Speaker 1 You've got to watch some Nancy Myers. Yes.
Speaker 1 I mean, Father of the Bride is a classic, but you should also see Something's Gotta Give.
Speaker 1 Gotta give, which is not free with ads anywhere, which was killing me and i really wanted to watch it and i almost used your husband's credit card to order it and then i and then i went and then i went maybe that's crossing a line and so then i didn't i didn't do it but i will tell you the credit card of the people you're house sitting for yeah i'm sorry but i i will say this your netflix algorithm is fucked because i watched hunting wives that's okay but it does keep recommending us kunk on earth like more than anything oh yeah
Speaker 1
i watched that a lot yeah i did i like kunk on earth you should watch Kunk on Earth. It's great.
You should watch it. We gave it a quick shot.
Maybe we'll come back to it. Come back to it.
Speaker 1 Not Cunk Edge, huh?
Speaker 1 I'll say this too. When I left to go to work, I would leave it on for Renley, and Renley seemed to like it.
Speaker 1
That must be why, because it's recommending it as if that's our favorite show we've ever seen. Like, it's in every category.
It's, yeah.
Speaker 1 Oh, here's your kunk.
Speaker 1 I have your cunk for you. Also, I watched like three seasons of Absolutely Fabulous, so that should be on there too.
Speaker 1 That has not been recommended. They decided we're done with it.
Speaker 1
Okay. So we learn from Diane Keaton's daughter that she's been sneaking out at night to see who her husband.
They're separated, but they're like hooking up on the side. The daughter doesn't like it.
Speaker 1 Very casually comes out as a lesbian, says that
Speaker 1 she's going to tell her dad later. That'll come up a couple more times.
Speaker 1 and then we meet the second first wife this is Goldie Han and she is shouting very sexually do it to me Morris which I'm like okay
Speaker 1 I'm in the movie it's like yes it's what it would sound like if I was eating Goldie Han's pussy
Speaker 1 always because she would call me by my last name she would call me by my yeah she doesn't want to get too personal no no no it's Goldie Han she doesn't uh you know she's she's just there for a hang, for a casual hang.
Speaker 1
Yeah, sure. And that's fine.
You know, I don't want to let her. I don't want to make her.
I don't want to tie her down, you know.
Speaker 1
She doesn't want to confuse you with all the other Jordans she's fucking at. Right.
Yeah. Michael.
Right. Uh-oh.
Sure. There's others.
Some
Speaker 1 tons of Jordans out there.
Speaker 1
She saves that kind of intimacy for Kurt Russell. That's what she calls herself.
That's right. Kurt.
You're just.
Speaker 1 I would like to talk about just how beautiful Gold, like, all three women are beautiful in this, but Goldie Han is like, god damn, she's so pretty. Anyway, go ahead with what you're saying.
Speaker 1
So, Rob Reiner is here. We should mention that every little character is an actor you love.
Very cool, all the people that pop up in this movie.
Speaker 1
Even some like pre-fame people who would kind of like go on to become famous. That's kind of cool.
But yeah, Rob Reiner is her like plastic surgeon.
Speaker 1 A lot of plastic surgery jokes in this about Goldie Han. She has like kind of big, crazy, like lips for a while.
Speaker 1 So, yeah, she is an actor. She's getting older, and she's having a ton of plastic surgery to compensate for her getting older.
Speaker 1 And then we meet the third of the first wives, Bette Midler. She's kind of like the house, like the housewife, I think, supposed to be kind of the, you know, stay-at-home mom.
Speaker 1 She's got a son who's preparing for his bar mitzvah. And
Speaker 1 oh, God, there's a band he wanted for the bar mitzvah. It kind of had a funny name of like, what if an old screenwriter had to come up with like a metal band name?
Speaker 1 Just like the Cleveland cleveland steamers or something
Speaker 1 like that yes it's something like cleveland steamers
Speaker 1 sex act where you shit on someone yes that's in the first wives club yeah or the glass bottom boat something there's something like that yeah it's some sort of shit sex act anyway uh so we've we've met we've met the wives uh and they all get the bad news at the same time that this uh the the fourth friend of theirs committed suicide and they all have to go to the funeral um so
Speaker 1 you just keep calling her the fourth wife and like, oh, we meet the first of the, it's Stalker Channing. Stalker.
Speaker 1 Like it's weird that you're not mentioning
Speaker 1 very famous actor.
Speaker 1 Yes, one scene. She's electric.
Speaker 1
She is. She's a smoke show.
I just, all these women are total smoke shows.
Speaker 1 It's fun to see a movie where it's like, I've always thought they were beautiful, even when I was like really young. And there's something really, I don't know,
Speaker 1 affirming about the women at this age in Hollywood making a hugely successful film, all carrying it together and just looking fucking fabulous.
Speaker 1 And I've already like googled a brown leather blazer a lot
Speaker 1 because
Speaker 1 of Diane Keaton's brown leather blazer she wears in this. And I have found one, but it is expensive.
Speaker 1 So let me know if you want to donate to my GoFundMe for my brown leather blazer.
Speaker 1 The brown leather blazer, the most colorful thing in this movie. This is beige.
Speaker 1 Beige.
Speaker 1
Beige movie. Beige.
But it's
Speaker 1 beautiful, though.
Speaker 1 It's an aesthetic that,
Speaker 1
you know, carrying on to other movies, from what I understand. But yes, just a beige beige.
Just like an IKEA meatball with this movie.
Speaker 1 So
Speaker 1
the wives reconnect at the funeral. They all go to lunch together in a very cool looking restaurant, like all the bars and restaurants in this movie.
Dude, that restaurant,
Speaker 1 we paused on it to look at it just like, God, nothing looks this like rich and like, I don't know, fabulous anymore. And I'm like, I feel like all restaurants now are just...
Speaker 1 buildings that they painted, you know, millennial gray because they know the building is going to, like, the business is going to fail soon.
Speaker 1 So the point is to resell the, like, the building over and over. So nothing looks like it's got character or like thought put into it.
Speaker 1
And I was like, oh, I always thought when I got older, I'd be in these restaurants all the time. Sure.
Yeah, you want that like kitsch. Not everything needs to be like minimalist, industrial.
There's
Speaker 1
maximalist this place. And I think it's in New York.
Neon sign that says work, bitch.
Speaker 1 Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 1 Some succulents in mason jars, and that's their decor.
Speaker 1 But it's also like all of these people are in their 40s and 50s with money drinking midday, like, and not just a mimosa, like straight-up vodka with one piece of ice at 11 a.m. I fucking love it.
Speaker 1 That's what I thought my life would be, and now everyone thinks I have a problem.
Speaker 1
I did love the progression of their drink orders, getting the Virgin Mary, Bloody Mary vodka rocks. I like them a lot.
It all doesn't it? That's really good. It really does.
Speaker 1 They get shit faced at this place. It's wonderful.
Speaker 1 Yeah.
Speaker 1 So we, so, you know, we get a lot of like very 1996 humor here. Goldie Hans talking about how she, you know, she doesn't want to act young.
Speaker 1 She's like, I'm not going to go rollerblading, you know, that thing that made, that indicated that you were young in 1996. She went rollerblading.
Speaker 1 Or that you were pretending to do something for a boy to like you, which that's why I rollerbladed. Oh, okay.
Speaker 1 And I sucked at it. Did it work?
Speaker 1 No.
Speaker 1
No, it didn't. I took lessons and everything.
You took lessons.
Speaker 1 Where do you get rollerblade lessons? My parents got it for me.
Speaker 1 Did you get private tutor? No, no,
Speaker 1 no. There were classes.
Speaker 1 No, well, probably, but it was a, there's this like bike and skate shop in like around where my parents' house was because all kids were like skating then in the 90s. And
Speaker 1 I had wrist guards, knee pads, and elbow pads, and a helmet.
Speaker 1
Ready for the X games. Yeah.
And they just taught me how to line up against the sidewalk and hop up onto the sidewalk. That was
Speaker 1 the fundamentals. That's like that's pretty much all I learned.
Speaker 1 You got to walk before you can blade, you know? Yeah.
Speaker 1
I would just stop myself by falling because I had the wrist guards. Yeah.
And I just, I hate it. I hate roller skating.
I hate bike riding. I hate all of it.
Wow.
Speaker 1 Well, I can't believe that didn't get the guy hopping up onto the curb and then falling onto your wrists. Yeah.
Speaker 1
You and Goldie Hahn's character have a lot in common. You both hate rollerblades.
Except for I can't pull off. Those, that haircut is the haircut I have brought in to my hairdresser over and over.
Speaker 1
And I got the bangs like her. I tried.
It did not. You can't, her bangs are immaculate in this, but I think it's because she's fine with them being in her eyes.
Yeah.
Speaker 1 Like those things are poking the literal corneas, and she doesn't care. Okay, I have to say this, and look,
Speaker 1 I love Colie Hans, so I don't mean this in a mean way, but she looks just like the dog from Lady and the Tramp. You know what? Who is
Speaker 1 the sexy, sultry dog at the pound? Yeah, that's a, I mean, if you're going to compare someone to a dog, you might as well compare them to the sexiest dog in the second
Speaker 1
sexiest dog. I mean, not Spuds McKenzie, but close.
The way, the way I have thought that too, but you're so dead on, but it looks great. I love it on her.
Speaker 1 The hair, like in her eyes, and then you get the peak of the like blue eyeshadow. I'm like, that's that dog.
Speaker 1 Sorry.
Speaker 1
No offense, but you look like a hot dog. You're the hottest dog.
I mean, you know what I mean. You could land the tramp.
Yeah. You look like that Priss lady.
Speaker 1 I mean, all those dogs wanted to bang that dog.
Speaker 1 Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
Speaker 1 So we kind of learn what's happening to
Speaker 1 the other wives of the wives club.
Speaker 1 Diane Keaton is going to see a therapist that's treated as a very like kooky thing that she's doing.
Speaker 1
Marsha Gay Harden. Marcia Gay Harden, yeah.
Who is introduced like leg first? They do the slowest, horny.
Speaker 1 And really get to look up Marsha Gay Harden's dress.
Speaker 1 That's how they introduced Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman to be like, look at this piece of meat.
Speaker 1
She's a sex worker and you're going to like her. They do that with the therapist.
So it's very much telegraphing. There's going to be
Speaker 1 the twist is that the husband is cheating with the therapist. And I'm like, well, the movie thinks that's a good idea.
Speaker 1
The movie's on board. Part of me thinks she wanted to be the third because she keeps asking Diane Keaton to like be mean to her.
Like she's like, hit me, hit me. Right, yeah.
Speaker 1
She has a very wild therapy session. She like hits her with this kind of foam like nerf bat.
Yeah, and then she's going to be like, spit in my mouth. And then, like,
Speaker 1 you know, a typical therapy session. It's just therapy.
Speaker 1 You know, you don't want so weak to maintain.
Speaker 1 Anyway, so yeah, we go, we go back to the husband's house.
Speaker 1 Wouldn't that be great if we could go, speaking of, better help. Better help.
Speaker 1
We got to get a sponsor, guys. We got to get a sponsor.
We got to get a sponsor. Not that one, but any, you know, another one.
Speaker 1 So, so they go to Diane Keaton's house, and that's where we kind of learn that the therapist has been, like, hooking up with the husband.
Speaker 1
And obviously, Diane Keaton is mad, and Smart Skate Harton has this great line delivery. She's like, this is rough.
I know that. I like that she acknowledges.
It's like, yeah, this is fucked up.
Speaker 1
You've learned that. It's a great character game to keep doing therapy.
It is. I know.
Speaker 1 This is like, I think, the best, like, the most comedically sound scene in the movie because it has this funny premise of like they're fighting and the therapist is trying to therapy them.
Speaker 1
Yeah, I like this scene. Oh, well, we got to get the founding premise of the movie from the drinking that they had.
All of them have been put upon by their husbands.
Speaker 1
Like all of them have been wronged. So they already are in a club, whether or not they founded the name of it or not.
But also, her husband fucks her.
Speaker 1 Before breaking up with her and Marsha Gay Harden coming in, like, fuck off.
Speaker 1 But she doesn't tell Marsha Gay Harden because she's like, oh, you're here. And then he immediately says, oh, I just was telling her that I want a divorce.
Speaker 1 Why doesn't Diane Keaton just say, like, ah, that's not what happened? Like,
Speaker 1
you were just balls deep in me. Right.
You know, I feel like Marsha Gay Harden would not approve about that. And she would have killed that line too.
She would have absolutely.
Speaker 1
And it sounds like her voice. It does.
It does. Her screaming and getting mad in any movie is, she's so good at screaming.
I love her so much.
Speaker 1 So
Speaker 1 Goldie Han's plot is that she's kind of like, you know,
Speaker 1 Hollywood is forcing her into mom role. She has a little
Speaker 1 dinner with a screenwriter played by Timothy Allphant. This is very fun to see him.
Speaker 1 So young and hot.
Speaker 1
So hot. Woo, baby.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1
Yeah, got an earring. That's how you know he's a cool guy.
But yeah, he wants her to play the mom in a movie.
Speaker 1 So like everybody's life's falling apart they all they all meet they get these letters from uh from their dead friend that telling her them you know uh what they mean to her and that kind of brings them together and they all decide to drop their wedding rings into a glass of champagne and cheers to their new club the first wives club um there's some voiceover like goldie han does voiceover throughout this movie and she says uh like something along the lines of getting together was easy finding out what to do next that was hard and i'm like this is the screenwriter expressing frustration with this movie like yeah um it's the first wives and then they
Speaker 1 something else they gotta get revenge uh they give them a club but they murder
Speaker 1 too much too much yeah it does seem very inspired by nine to five to me of you know these women getting together the three of them they've been wronged they want to get payback but then it it does feel like the the screenwriter was like whoop relaudin can't actually do nine to five so it doesn't really go that far they they want to get revenge but in all these different ways of kind of ruining the business i gotta be honest the goldie han walking in and taking all of her husband's shit was pretty fun yeah like that that that just like um you know bulldozing the door open the secretary i'm gonna take all your shit including your desk everything i'm out yeah that was and then she took his Lamborghini and then auctioned everything off.
Speaker 1
I fucking loved it because she didn't, she was like, fuck your red tape. I walk in the door.
I take it all. And I brought hunks with me to take it all with me.
It was amazing. Also, her sunglasses.
Speaker 1 I've been trying to find these sunglasses.
Speaker 1
It seems like you're just fixated on Goldie Hog. I love her.
Yeah. You're like, give me the bangs.
Give me the sunglasses. Give me Diane Keaton's coat.
This is just your Pinterest board.
Speaker 1
Yes, pretty much. This whole thing.
So they each, so they each like try and take down their husbands and like the husband's new girlfriends in different ways.
Speaker 1 So yeah, as you mentioned, Goldie Han, like all the, because she was the like actor and the husband was the producer. So like all the stuff is like legally hers.
Speaker 1
So yeah, she kind of like swoops in with the repo like team, takes all his stuff. Her husband is dating Elizabeth Berkeley.
Elizabeth Berkeley, a you know, fresh off Showgirls, Elizabeth Berkeley.
Speaker 1 Oh, wait. When was Showgirls? Is that Showgirls was 95, Maybe?
Speaker 1 Really? Yeah. So, yeah, maybe she like had, maybe Showgirls had not like come out when they had started filming this.
Speaker 1
Yeah, I would like to talk about the crime that is Elizabeth Berkeley's hair in this movie. I thought it was wonderful.
Yeah, she looks great.
Speaker 1 I think it's great for the character.
Speaker 1 Yeah, you didn't like it.
Speaker 1
It's so different from the girl. It's like the Maldie Hawn, which I think is important.
It looks like
Speaker 1
it's never known a brush. It's never seen a brush.
Doesn't know it. It's free.
Speaker 1
Exactly. It's supposed to look hard.
I hated it. Well, it just looks like,
Speaker 1
I don't know. It looks like bedhead.
It looks tangled. It looks a mess.
It reminded me of ramen noodles. Yeah.
Girl. I want to eat her hair.
Speaker 1 Crack an egg on there.
Speaker 1 Let's do something.
Speaker 1 I want some bamboo shoots in that.
Speaker 1
It also just looked thin and like crunchy. But like, show girls, that hair is beautiful.
Like, it's the curls are defined.
Speaker 1 I was like, who hated her on set like and did this to her hair i was so mad i'm so mad for her i think she's like i think she's really funny in this i think she like cults her own with you know the like these comedy legends who are in this movie and yeah i think we can all agree maybe elizabeth berkeley kind of got a bad rap from the industry
Speaker 1 and yeah and her performance was excellent and she is stunningly beautiful but and the hair doesn't change any of that but i could not stop like looking at it i hated it so much i love the hair.
Speaker 1 The other
Speaker 1 young girlfriend is Sarah Jessica Parker, kind of like a little flip on her LA story role here.
Speaker 1 That was that hair.
Speaker 1 Sarah Jessica Parker in LA story is a very like prominent.
Speaker 1 Oh, I'm noticing a girl moment for me as a kid. Oh,
Speaker 1 I haven't seen that one, but I like that there's some IMDb overlap because Sarah Jessica Parker and Bette Midler starred together in Hocus Pocus. That's right.
Speaker 1 And then Sarah Jessica Parker and Diane Keaton starred together in The Family Stone, which I just watched. We're going to be doing it on Podstruck in December.
Speaker 1 And so it was fun to see, you know, I'm like, oh, wow, what a little Venn diagram.
Speaker 1 So, yeah, so everybody's
Speaker 1 doing their scheme.
Speaker 1
I think Diane Keaton is just kind of like taking over, doing a hostile takeover of the husband's company. I never really understood what Diane Keaton did.
Her husband was a lawyer.
Speaker 1
No, he's ad agents. Yeah, advertising.
He was like Donald Draper, but not as hot.
Speaker 1
Yeah, and his partners are selling their shares. She's going to take it over, and then she'll be his boss.
Yeah.
Speaker 1
Oh, yeah. And her daughter is kind of like spying.
Her daughter, they do a thing where they go to like a like a gay bar to see her daughter and tell her about the scheme.
Speaker 1 And I'm kind of white-knuckling knuckling it when they go in the gay bar and you know what for 1996 it's pretty good it's a huge scene
Speaker 1 yeah they're being supportive we get a leah dalaria uh cameo
Speaker 1 and you know i gotta say that
Speaker 1 she she was in orange is the new black she's you know she's in a lot of things I gotta say, this movie, they say the word lesbian a lot.
Speaker 1
And it's funny, you just don't hear lesbian as much as you used used to. You know, you know what I mean, guys.
Am I old?
Speaker 1 No, I remember.
Speaker 1
Everyone was lesbian, and now it's like you don't say lesbian anymore. Yeah, no, you say queer.
Yeah, everyone, everyone is just gay. Also, it seems like they don't quite know
Speaker 1 I just say friend. Oh, yeah.
Speaker 1
Partner. Later, when she tells the dad, she says, Oh, and daddy, I'm a lesbian, a big one.
Big one. I'm like, What does that mean? Like, that means it was easy.
I'm eating pussy for every meal.
Speaker 1
I've never had a long fingernail. A lot of, I think there are moments in this movie where you're like, ah, straight white dudes made this movie.
Yeah.
Speaker 1 Straight white dudes wrote and directed this movie. A big 96.
Speaker 1 A big straight white guy.
Speaker 1 I'm a lesbian for real.
Speaker 1 Real big.
Speaker 1 Big, straight white guy who directed a bunch of Burt Reynolds movies. True.
Speaker 1 Oh, cool.
Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1
Anyway, I also went on to direct, I think, like the Dudley Dew Wright movie with Brendan Frazier. Cool.
Anyway, yeah, fun career on this guy. Anyway.
Speaker 1 Well, wait, so going back, though, to the daughter, it is so fucked up of Diane Keaton to bring her daughter in on the plan against the dad. And I clearly the daughter has some resentment, but
Speaker 1
she wanted to be in on it. She's very passionate about it.
Yeah, but Diane Keaton should not indulge this. I mean, like, look, my parents have fought my entire lives.
I was a love child.
Speaker 1
They were never married. And they have a very fraught relationship.
And
Speaker 1
yeah, like they still, I just went home when Emily was house sitting. I went home to Cleveland.
And even then, my mom was like, tell me all the dirt. Like, what was it like?
Speaker 1 Like, you know, when I saw my dad, and I had to be like, well, yeah, like, he made his girlfriend cry at my sister's house in front of everyone. And my mom's like, oh, that's classic Larry.
Speaker 1 He's abusive. He's, ah, and like, you know what what I mean? I'm like, this isn't healthy for anyone.
Speaker 1 True.
Speaker 1 So,
Speaker 1
you know what I mean? So anyway, for the hero, I'm like, that's a little bit of a villain move, Diane Keith. Yeah, yeah.
But she is someone that's a pushover. Yeah.
Speaker 1
That's like kind of the arc for her is her being a little bit of a pushover. But I also want to mention her mother in this movie.
Yes. The elderly lady with the best red lip I've ever seen in life.
Speaker 1
I love her. She's amazing.
I don't know if she's like an iconic, like legendary actress or something, but I really liked their dynamic, the three of them. So I don't know.
Speaker 1
I think that the daughter was like, fuck men. It's like the vibe.
Yes. That they were trying, which again, written by men.
Speaker 1
How do I write a lesbian? Well, they hate men. That's the only reason they're not attracted to us because they're filled with bigoted hate.
Yes.
Speaker 1 Exactly.
Speaker 1 Anyway, so there's this thing where they're kind of trying to sneak around and find like incriminating documents and then they almost get caught and they get on this like window washer platform that's kind of like a big physical set piece
Speaker 1
and as they're kind of like falling down the building, like everyone recognizes Goldie Hahn. That's a little running joke because she's famous.
She has an Oscar in the movie.
Speaker 1 They like are falling down the building and as they like stop in front of people's windows, they're all, you look great. It's kind of fun.
Speaker 1 But why would the window washing have a tower of terror button? Why wouldn't it just do an instant death button? Right. It shouldn't have a free fall
Speaker 1
switch, but this one does. Yeah.
Yeah. I bet window watchers were watching this movie going, like, that would never happen.
That would never happen.
Speaker 1 Somebody can do their research. Some straight white man right in this movie.
Speaker 1 Not straight enough. He doesn't know about window washing.
Speaker 1 The straightest activity there is.
Speaker 1 Also, that whole scene where they're, you know, sneaking in that leads them to the window washer, we get a lot of good work from Bronson Pinchot, who I want to call out because, like you said, there's a lot of great side characters.
Speaker 1 And I specifically want to shout him out because
Speaker 1 I think of him in his best work as being in risky business. And Emily, when she came on our podstruck podcast, we covered risky business.
Speaker 1 And Emily talked a lot about loving Bronson and just being real into him in that movie. So what did you think about Bronson here?
Speaker 1 I mean,
Speaker 1 he's hot as hell, but this character, something about this character made it seem like he wasn't from me.
Speaker 1
Like he wouldn't have found me. I wouldn't have had a shot.
Yeah, he's gay. A big one.
A big one. We have a lot of these types of characters in movies in the 90s.
Speaker 1 I think there's like Martin Short is kind of this in Baba the Bride. It's a kind of a
Speaker 1
kind of foreign kind of gay guy. Yes, absolutely.
Who's from somewhere? Yeah, there's a lot of things like, is it the accent or is he gay?
Speaker 1 Also,
Speaker 1
I want to point this out. I have not done a lot of acting work, but I did an episode of an ill-fated sitcom.
that
Speaker 1 ill-fated you say yeah it it was canceled after my episode there were three episodes that came out okay you were there that's pretty
Speaker 1 manhattan Manhattan Love Story was the name of it. My episode was called Gay or British.
Speaker 1 Okay.
Speaker 1
Yes. I get checks in the mail for it says gay or British on it.
I don't need that insight. I think that's kind of funny.
Speaker 1
So, yeah, it's like a British guy that everybody's like, I want to, like, they want to hook up with him, but then they're like, is he? Is he not? Yeah, you wear an ascot. You don't know.
Yeah.
Speaker 1 You know? So I think that theme was, you know, it's been around for a while, and maybe I hope that we've retired it.
Speaker 1 Yeah.
Speaker 1 Though I was confused because wouldn't Morty recognize his wife's gay best friend? Like, he went to the funeral with her. Like, he spent so much time with the wife.
Speaker 1 Like, and also, you have an actress in the group, Goldie Han. Why wouldn't they just be like, Goldie Han, call up one of your actor friends to play this part?
Speaker 1
And yeah, we're doing covert sneak around stuff. Maybe let's leave behind the most famous person in the world.
Yeah. Yeah, there's just a lot of
Speaker 1 it was a fun set piece, but I did have some small logic bumps. So that is plot hole for sure.
Speaker 1
Look, no one cares about the logic in a movie like this, but I'm just flagging it. Yeah, yeah.
You know, the inevitable thing is. We're doing a podcast about it.
You got to talk about something.
Speaker 1
Oh, wait, we got to do it. You can't just say things that happen in the movie.
Maggie Smith is in this. Maggie Smith.
Also, with a crazy accent. Is she British or southern?
Speaker 1 No idea, but I could listen to her say anything and any weird action she decides to do. And the the name Ganilla?
Speaker 1
It's fine. I was fine.
I was all in. For the second, they were like, oh, that's my friend, Ganilla.
I was like, yes.
Speaker 1 I love it.
Speaker 1 So the thing with Bette Midler's husband, they're like threatening him with the mob. So Bette Middler, I guess, is mopped up in this.
Speaker 1 This is all very confusing to me.
Speaker 1 This is when we're coming to Matt, the man with the Sopranos podcast.
Speaker 1
How did you feel about the portrayal of the mafia in this? Well, first of all, that is exactly how the mafia be. You know, they be named Carmine.
They be like,
Speaker 1 Want me to kill this guy? They love to say that out loud. They love to kill guys.
Speaker 1 But I was very confused as to whose
Speaker 1 uncle this was. Was this
Speaker 1 her father's brother?
Speaker 1 Okay, so she's half Italian, half Jewish. That's
Speaker 1 they can be both, Matt.
Speaker 1 Listen, is there not a Jewish mafia?
Speaker 1
Well, that's that's the thing, but he was clearly Sicilian mafia. His name was Carmine.
So I assumed that that's what was going on, but I don't fully know, and I don't understand.
Speaker 1 Well, I would think that her mother was maybe Jewish. Right.
Speaker 1
But he was coming to the bar mitzvah. They were coming to the bar mitzvah.
And listen, Italians are now welcome at synagogue, so that's fine. It's totally fine.
Speaker 1
Are people who are not Jewish, are men, can they put on the yamakas? Yeah, yeah, anyone can do it. I was, I was making a joke as if Italians weren't.
Only I got that one.
Speaker 1 But yeah, no, this is one of the more confusing things because it's just like
Speaker 1 he has
Speaker 1 Bette Midler's husband has an electronics business that he is going to get
Speaker 1 arrested over because of the fact that his
Speaker 1 he bought stolen goods from her uncle.
Speaker 1 Yeah.
Speaker 1 Wouldn't that also
Speaker 1 implicate her uncle and tie them into a Rico case, in which case he just snitched on himself to help her? So window washers and mafia guys are watching this movie going, what's going on? Yeah.
Speaker 1
Do the research. I imagine also therapists are watching this going, there's no way a therapist would see both a husband and a wife separately.
That's just a matter of time.
Speaker 1 And we don't have nerf bats. Yeah, no.
Speaker 1 At some point, so there's like the like, you know, police come to like get
Speaker 1
Bette Midler's husband. Dan Hidea, I guess we should say Dan Hidea.
Yeah,
Speaker 1
and we get the J.K. Simmons cameo.
Right. J.K.
Simmons is like, has no lines. He just comes in and arrests this guy.
I think it's because he failed to get pictures of Spider-Man.
Speaker 1
Anyway, so yeah, we're kind of like wrapping up. We're kind of wrapping up here.
We're kind of getting our revenge. Revenge is getting got.
Speaker 1 Let's take a little break and then we'll come back for some more.
Speaker 1
Hey, everybody, it's us, the Free With Ads gang. We're going to get back to the show, but first, we're going to read a Jumbotron.
What's a Jumbotron, you ask? Hell yeah, it's how we survive.
Speaker 1 If it's why we're alive, without this we die
Speaker 1 food in my mouth i won't have enough tick tock bras to survive
Speaker 1 listen emily needs to keep some of the bras she can't sell all of her bras something's gotta hold them up something's gotta hold them up um help emily maintain bras by going to maximumfun.org slash jumbotron here's what happens you pay a nominal fee and we share a message with our beloved listeners This person did that, and now we're going to share their message.
Speaker 1 This message is for Mike from Jack. This is a friend message, and we're gonna hear it read by Emily in one of her famous
Speaker 1 funny voices. Emily, what do you got?
Speaker 1 Okay, all right,
Speaker 1 I'm gonna think of something. Okay,
Speaker 1 happy tenth buddiversary, Mike.
Speaker 1 Oh boy, shut up
Speaker 1 I couldn't shut up Matt
Speaker 1 I couldn't ever wish for a more reliable movie ticket procure
Speaker 1 Text thread co-author baseball nostalgia sharer disc gauntlet spiner stadium companion and coffee potty
Speaker 1 I thought the 42 might be too old to make a great new friend, but I'm glad to have been proven wrong.
Speaker 1
Oh, I'm out of breath. Okay.
P.S., I love. No.
P.S. Love to Emily Matt Jordan.
Speaker 1 There you go. My face is so red.
Speaker 1 You are very red, right? Emily.
Speaker 1
Emily gives it 10 out of 10 for every jumbo trial. Absolutely.
She really does. You should kill.
Speaker 1 And listen, don't we love this expression of positive masculinity? Isn't this nice?
Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah. I like when friends pay to
Speaker 1
tell their friends how much they love it. I did it in my most masculine voice.
There you go. That was wonderful.
Speaker 1 Maximumfun.org/slash jumbotron, and you can share a message too. Okay, back to Wonderful is a podcast where we talk about things we like.
Speaker 1 That's hard to sell in a promo like this, so we've enlisted the help of piano rock superstar Billy Joel to tell you about some of the topics we've covered. Take it away, real Billy Joel.
Speaker 1 Diddy Rocksman on Lake
Speaker 1
Listen to Wonderful every Wednesday on maximumfun.org or wherever you get your podcasts. Thanks, Real Billy Joel.
No problem, Griffin. The show.
Speaker 1
We're back. It's Free with Ads.
We're here with Chelsea Davidson from the Podstruck podcast. We're talking about the First Wives Club.
Okay.
Speaker 1
Jordan, I have to say, it almost sounds like you're saying Davidson. I said Davidson.
Davidson. Davidson.
Davidson. Did you hear a D in there? Throw it away.
I thought you were slipping a second D.
Speaker 1 No, I would never slip in the second D.
Speaker 1
Don't even think about it. I would never.
Chelsea. Honestly, I think it's offensive.
He's calling you by your maiden name. Well, I still go by.
Disgusting.
Speaker 1
I'm sorry, I'm disrespecting your husband, Chelsea, by not using. So did I.
I didn't take his name. So, you know what? Like I said, first wife, we'll see if last.
Speaker 1 So the wives,
Speaker 1 they have a little falling out.
Speaker 1
They kind of yell at each other. They have a little slap fight.
They kind of call out Goldie Han for her drinking.
Speaker 1
There's kind of a moment where they pull out her garbage can and it's full of like empty vodka bottles. And she's like, I had people over.
And Bette Midler's like, who'd you have over? Guns n' Roses.
Speaker 1 I think maybe that was even sweaty for 1996.
Speaker 1
Who's the coolest person of 1996? Is it Guns N' Roses? I don't know. I think that it is good writing, though, because it's like a woman like her.
That's
Speaker 1
what I'm saying. That's the writing.
You're right. She would make
Speaker 1 them.
Speaker 1 Yeah, she wouldn't have the most contemporary poll
Speaker 1 about that.
Speaker 1 So
Speaker 1 the way they trap Goldie Han's husband is they
Speaker 1 make him think that Elizabeth Berkeley was under age
Speaker 1
when they were hooking up. I guess that she wasn't.
I kind of sort of missed this point. So
Speaker 1 this is kind of a little thing that's up for debate
Speaker 1 because you could take it as they did on Earth Herald Yearbook and Discover This. However, there's a line where they say,
Speaker 1
like, oh, I haven't been able to find anything on him. Like, he's, you know, he doesn't have any skeletons in his closet.
And something like that.
Speaker 1
And then someone says, we don't, I don't need to actually have anything. I just need to make him think he's done something illegal.
So that's why it seems like, okay,
Speaker 1 they're just making this
Speaker 1 year book. Sure.
Speaker 1
It's a weird little thing. I think the movie doesn't realize how dark it's being in that moment.
It's this thing of like, haha, got him. It's like, oh, but this is kind of icky.
Speaker 1
Anyway, so yeah, this six-foot-tall 15-year-old. Yeah, sure.
And yes, Elizabeth Berkeley does look like she's in her mid-30s in this movie. And she also looks like she's six foot seven.
Speaker 1
Like she's giant. Sure.
yes she has she played a stripper the year before this so
Speaker 1 anyway um we get the uh
Speaker 1 so they get they get a bunch of money they kind of extort a bunch of money uh from their husbands um and they start turning their uh kind of revenge office into something beautiful we get the uh we get the needle drop that was destined to be in this movie from second one sisters are doing it for themselves uh and they open
Speaker 1 not a revenge center which you think they're going to do but they open up a center for women uh kind of named for named for their friend uh very sweet and they have a big ol party for the center um it's like a crisis center i guess yes yeah yes
Speaker 1 um
Speaker 1 who's who's at the party but uh ivana trump who is uh the first wife of donald trump who you might know from the epstein files yeah
Speaker 1 Yeah, Ivana Trump before she was in the golf course. Yeah.
Speaker 1
Oh, my God. I forgot about that.
Pushed downstairs to her death and then ended up in the golf course.
Speaker 1 Yeah. So anyway,
Speaker 1 1996, huh?
Speaker 1
What a time. 1996.
Gloria Steinem is also at the party. Oh, and guys, I met her.
I have a photo with her. Chelsea.
Where'd you meet her?
Speaker 1 I did a show at Joe's pub that was full of famous people and i was brought in as the one not famous person on the lineup to do a lena dunham impression they were like amy polar amy schumer uh it was all the amys yeah all the amys uh girl i saw that plaque on the wall next to your baby's crib there you go put you out
Speaker 1 Every time you say something about the house, I'm like, right, you were just here. I was, and you have no matches anywhere and so many candles.
Speaker 1 So many candles. We have an electric lighter.
Speaker 1
Where? Where was it? I couldn't. I could have just told you.
Although, your safe combination is super obvious.
Speaker 1 Well, no, you had so many candles. Cornostash is so disorganized.
Speaker 1
There were a lot of candles everywhere. And I was like, I'm going to light some candles.
And I
Speaker 1 made a copy of my passport. Is that a problem?
Speaker 1 No, girl. I lost my mind trying to find matches.
Speaker 1
Yeah. Yeah.
So Bette Midler and Dan Hidea get back together. And I didn't mention this.
They were in college. They were a singing group and they sang like girl group songs.
Speaker 1 And they all, the kind of movie ends on a big choreographed,
Speaker 1 choreographed sing-along dance to
Speaker 1 Leslie Gores.
Speaker 1
You don't know me. You don't know me.
Yes. Yeah.
And it's like, it's all kind of choreographed and the movie is like a musical in that moment.
Speaker 1 And it kind of made me wish there was just more random random musical numbers
Speaker 1 yeah note to end on it's interesting because a lot of movies i think in this vein a lot of chick flicks a lot of rom-coms open with a musical number right you know like my best friend's wedding famously and there's so many that do this trope and this is one of the only ones i can think of that ends with it oh that's true i mean aside from like every bollywood movie that like ends with a big dance but for for a movie like this it's it's rare i think um well yeah that's the first wives club.
Speaker 1
We're going to say what we thought about it. But first, you know, we got to do the hunk watch.
It's hunk watch.
Speaker 1 Chelsea,
Speaker 1 this segment, we name a hunk of the movie.
Speaker 1
It could be someone you're sexually attracted to. It could be someone you just thought did a great job.
It could be a monster you like if we're watching a monster movie.
Speaker 1 We're not in this case, but you know, it could be the blob or something. But yeah, do you have any thoughts on the hunks of this movie? We can go around the horn and come back to you if you'd like to.
Speaker 1 No, I okay. I just, I, maybe I'm breaking the rules, but you know what? You already said I'm a little bit of a bad girl.
Speaker 1 So here we go.
Speaker 1
All right. Hunger, hunk award obviously goes to Timothy Oliphant because he's so hot.
But, but, but. I do want to give a special shout out.
Speaker 1 On our show, we would call it the Judy Greer Award for side character quirkiness.
Speaker 1 So I'll just say my other hunk award has to go to Sarah Jessica Parker because she plays unlikable unlikable better, I think, than anyone because she manages to be uptight, neurotic, unlikable, just a bitch in a way that you love.
Speaker 1
I want to see her be evil. I love her.
And I think that's, there's something inherently charismatic and sexy about it that just draws me in. So, you know what, SJP? You also get hunk of the movie.
Speaker 1 Hell yes.
Speaker 1
You're so right about that. And it makes me think about Family Stone, too, but she is.
Exactly. she's super unlikable in it, but you still end up being like, I think I love her.
I know.
Speaker 1 Matt, any thoughts on the hunks of the film? Yeah, I mean, for me, it's got to be Dan Hideya. I'm a big Hideya head.
Speaker 1
I see him in a 90s movie I watched. That's kind of the rule.
I can't think of a single time he's been in a movie in the 90s and I've ever switched the channel.
Speaker 1 He plays a great,
Speaker 1 you know, exasperated dad.
Speaker 1
And in this dad and Clueless, right? Yes. Oh, yeah, yeah.
Dad and Clueless. Also, Cheers.
That's a dad.
Speaker 1
Right? Such a dad. He's in Cheers.
He's like the scumbag husband of, god damn it, Danny.
Speaker 1
I can't remember her name. What's her name? Chelly Long.
No, Danny DeVito's wife. Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1
Maria Pearlman. Maria Pearlman.
Yeah, that's her scumbag husband.
Speaker 1 He also plays plays
Speaker 1 the mobbed-up guy who's trying to kill Whoopi Goldberg in the first sister action movie. Right.
Speaker 1
Damn, Matt, you pulled that one out. God, I love Dan Hideya.
So,
Speaker 1 yeah, for me, it's
Speaker 1
a man. I'm a dancer.
You know, that guy's back hair is crazy. Oh, you know what?
Speaker 1
You know, it goes wild back hair. It goes wild.
It's like steel wool. Yes, exactly.
Rub that everywhere with it. Rub that on plates.
Speaker 1 Talking about his body hair, I'm like, you're right. He is a hunk of the movie.
Speaker 1
Emily, any thoughts on that? Oh, yeah, it's Timothy Oliphant for me, dog. Sure, one scene, one scene.
Oh, God. One and done.
Speaker 1 One and done.
Speaker 1 All right. Now that we've talked about the hunks of the film, we're going to rank it on a scale of one to ten super loud commercials when we come back.
Speaker 1 What's more action-packed than prestige television? With more continuity than comic books?
Speaker 1 And more reality than reality television?
Speaker 1 It's professional wrestling.
Speaker 1 And to better understand wrestling is the ultimate form of entertainment, you need the Tites and Fights podcast.
Speaker 1 This is the perfect wrestling show with a lot of love, a lack of toxic masculinity, and just the right amount of butts, cats, and spandex.
Speaker 1 Listen to Tites and Fights every Saturday on maximum fun.
Speaker 1
We're We're back. It's free with ads.
We are going to rank the first wives club on a scale of one to ten super loud commercials with Chelsea Davison O D.
Speaker 1 Thank you.
Speaker 1
But first, we want to remind you to go to maximumfun.org/slash join. That's how you support the show.
That's how you hear all our bonus episodes.
Speaker 1 We got a bonus episode on the Pilot of the Twilight Zone, and we finally completed our trilogy of sense and sense of
Speaker 1 Pride and Prejudice. I said the other one.
Speaker 1 We completed our Pride and Prejudice trilogy by watching the 80s TV, made for TV Pride and Prejudice. So yeah, we've watched all the free filmed versions of that story.
Speaker 1
Wait, I got to ask Chelsea, have you watched all of those? Yes. Yeah.
You're talking about the one, the Colin Firth
Speaker 1 show.
Speaker 1
That's the 90s. The BBC.
Oh, that's the 90s. I haven't seen the 80s one.
There's an 80s one. Do you have a feeling on who the ultimate Mr.
Darcy is? Having not having seen the 80s one.
Speaker 1 Wow.
Speaker 1 Look,
Speaker 1
maybe this is controversial, but for me, it is Matthew McFadden. Yep, okay.
Yep, girl.
Speaker 1 That's not controversial at all.
Speaker 1 Because Colin Firth is so charming that
Speaker 1 it's like he's not unlikable enough, you know?
Speaker 1 Right. And in Bridget Jones, he's like a little too
Speaker 1
on the spectrum. Like, it's not even just like unlikable.
He's just sort of weird. And then.
Speaker 1 And then in love, actually, he's great.
Speaker 1 Yeah, he is great.
Speaker 1 But
Speaker 1 you know who I also want to shout out? From Fire Island,
Speaker 1 that movie, Great Queer Rom-com. Conrad Rickamura plays the Darcy character in that and is really good and is also pretentious.
Speaker 1 But I just love, I mean, I don't know, Matthew McFaden, it gets me all hot and bothered. Yeah,
Speaker 1 this is an ongoing, an ongoing conversation we have on the show.
Speaker 1
We solve it. We come to a conclusion in our bonus episode, which people can hear by going to maximum fund.org.
So you can't spoil if you agree.
Speaker 1 Join.
Speaker 1
In our bonus episode, we rank the Mr. Darcy's.
We each have our own personal ranking.
Speaker 1 And if people want to hear it, maximumfund.org slash join. There you go.
Speaker 1
What a little tease. A little tease.
Just a little tickle.
Speaker 1 Chelsea.
Speaker 1 Yeah.
Speaker 1 We rank the movies on a scale of 1 to 10 super loud commercials because that's what you got to pay to watch it.
Speaker 1
You're our guest. We love having you here.
Rank this movie 1 to 10 and share your thoughts. I'm going to give it a 7.
Speaker 1 I liked it more on this rewatch because I think I already had gone into it now
Speaker 1 knowing what it was, knowing it's not going to change my life, maybe, but it's just going to be a good time, a fun, good time.
Speaker 1 And
Speaker 1 I like how big it is. You know, Goldie Han, I think, really embodies this and nails it.
Speaker 1 But like, at times, these characters, Diane Keaton, is like bouncing around while getting hit with a rolled-up paper at one point. Like, it's a little bit loony tunes.
Speaker 1
They are plummeting from the sky. Like, it is bananas.
And I really like that.
Speaker 1 If anything, I feel like they maybe could have gotten an eight for me if they turned that up even further. Oh, wow.
Speaker 1 Because I think, like you said, maybe more musical numbers, maybe leaning into that like nine to five-esque energy, something like that.
Speaker 1 Because I thought it was at its most fun when it did just like, I don't know,
Speaker 1 swing for the fences, baby. Take big swings.
Speaker 1 Swinging like a nerf bat in therapy.
Speaker 1 Matt Lieb,
Speaker 1 you're a fan of this movie going into it. What was the rewatch like?
Speaker 1 I loved it even more this time than I did when I was a child and saw it with my parents.
Speaker 1 Yeah, I'm going to give it a nine. This is just one of my all-timers.
Speaker 1 I was just so happy to be reliving it. And
Speaker 1
the banter is really incredible. Like, there's just so many goddamn funny lines in this movie.
And it makes you forgive all the plot holes.
Speaker 1 So, yeah,
Speaker 1 I give it a nine.
Speaker 1 Emily, what do you think? One to ten? I'm also going to give it a nine.
Speaker 1
I love it so much. I'm feeling it like on the level of Moonstruck.
I loved Moonstruck so much, and I feel like I think Moonstruck is a little bit, a little a couple degrees ahead of this one.
Speaker 1 But I just think
Speaker 1 now, Chelsea,
Speaker 1 Oscars and
Speaker 1 Chelsea, Chelsea. Also, I stole a bunch of tampons and maxi pads.
Speaker 1
Not a bunch, just a few. I'm sorry.
Good job of dripping out this information.
Speaker 1 I don't know.
Speaker 1 I like being honest. Also,
Speaker 1 are you missing a child?
Speaker 1 Help the kids.
Speaker 1 Although, I do have to tell this story.
Speaker 1 There is a noise machine in her house that just is on a timer, and I thought I was haunted. I thought there was a haunting in the house, and I was so scared.
Speaker 1
It was in my three-year-old's room, and it comes on at I think 7 p.m. every night.
I locked that room from the outside because I thought a serial killer was in there fucking with me.
Speaker 1 A serial killer just going,
Speaker 1 Yes, yes, yes, yes, girl, yes.
Speaker 1 Anyway, sign up for Audible Trial.
Speaker 1 What?
Speaker 1
Scared the fuck out of me. Anyway, so I just think this cast is absolutely stacked.
The supporting cast is amazing. I think it's a beautiful movie to look at.
Speaker 1 I loved like the every house, every room they were in. I thought the costumes were to die for.
Speaker 1
I just think this is three women who are just so incredibly powerful at comedy. And to see the three of them have so much chemistry together and individually was so fun to watch.
It's delightful.
Speaker 1 I could watch it over and over again and never get tired of it. So it's a nice.
Speaker 1 Guys, I forgot to share my first wife's story, so I'll share it before I give my ranking.
Speaker 1 So I had never seen this movie before, but it sticks in my brain because of a weird experience I had around it.
Speaker 1 I was a one of my first LA jobs. I was a PA on the Ellen show.
Speaker 1 Yep, not a fun place to work.
Speaker 1 Nope, I won't tell you anymore unless you see me in person, then buy me a drink.
Speaker 1 But yeah, so I was a PA on Ellen, and
Speaker 1 you know that thing that happens when you haven't seen a movie someone loves, and instead of saying, boy, you should check that out, they treat you like you're insane. Yep.
Speaker 1 So
Speaker 1 I told, I forget who this was, I think it was somebody's assistant or like the receptionist asked if I had seen the first wives club. And I said that I had never seen the first wives club.
Speaker 1 She flipped out to a degree that frightened me. She,
Speaker 1 oh my, you've never seen the first club. And ran around the office.
Speaker 1 She got people out of their, she drug people out of their offices, corralled them in the like entranceway to all point at me and yell at me for not having seen the first wives' club.
Speaker 1 It was the most insane version of this
Speaker 1 I had ever experienced. And I'm like, listen,
Speaker 1 I don't want to gender everything. I am a 23-year-old guy.
Speaker 1 It's not wild that I would enjoy this movie, but it's, you know, not that insane that I wouldn't have seen it. Anyway, so
Speaker 1
I've always remembered this. And I'm like, I have to at least watch this movie someday.
And I'm glad I got a chance to hear.
Speaker 1 It's middle-aged white woman Star Wars is basically like yeah, I know it's like usually it's like a white dude doing that to a woman about Star Wars. Yeah.
Speaker 1 But this, and you know, hey, a taste of my own medicine. I'll take one for the team, I guess.
Speaker 1
Luke, I am your first wife. I don't even know what that's from.
Is that from the movie? Never heard that before.
Speaker 1 So yeah, I liked watching this, and it is like, I can really understand
Speaker 1
why this movie has like hung around like it has. It really has.
It's like hung around in the zeitgeist. It is, I think, a movie people re-watch a lot.
Speaker 1 And yeah, and I think it is not, it is a, it is a well-made movie where you have, you know,
Speaker 1 three leads, a whole cast of awesome people, but three leads who are like really like doing this thing better than anybody in the world does this thing.
Speaker 1 That being said, I did not like the movie or watching it, so I give it a one. Anyway, oh my god.
Speaker 1 Ow, chopsy.
Speaker 1 Thank you
Speaker 1 for being being here.
Speaker 1 It's not a bad movie. I just didn't like it.
Speaker 1
You just leave that and end up with the movie. This is the widest disparity I think you've ever had for a movie.
Not a bad movie. Jordan ever given anything a one.
Speaker 1 You might need to revise some of my other because we've watched worse. We've watched a ton of worst movies.
Speaker 1 I just didn't like watching it. I love it.
Speaker 1 I love you. You're like, this movie is so bad, it made me hate other movies even less.
Speaker 1 Yeah.
Speaker 1 Are you sure you don't just hate that experience of being bullied at work? Yeah.
Speaker 1 that definitely factors in.
Speaker 1 My narrative for myself was like, I bet I would love this movie.
Speaker 1 All the people who, well, I guess they were saying that I should have watched it because I, anyway, but I sat down wanting to like it and liking everybody involved.
Speaker 1 I just like didn't like what happened in the movie.
Speaker 1
Oh, my God. I feel like you're mad at us for like.
No, I'm not. I think it's a good movie.
I don't like tomatoes. I don't think tomatoes are bad and no one should watch them.
Speaker 1
I just don't want to ever eat a tomato. Right, but you're not saying like, it's just not for me.
You're being like, fuck tomatoes. No, that's
Speaker 1 funny. It was a one.
Speaker 1
If you see a tomato, you're knocking that sandwich out of someone's eyes. I think for other people, this is a nine, this is a ten, this is a classic.
I just like it. Jordan, you are
Speaker 1 actively trying to recreate the trauma of your past by giving it a one.
Speaker 1 You want us all to point and yell at you.
Speaker 1 Like, I got porn.
Speaker 1 I engaged with the movie.
Speaker 1 Like, I'm mad at you because you're making me defend it. I gave it a seven.
Speaker 1
Everything everyone said about the movie was right. I think that it is a well-made movie of skilled people doing a great job.
I just don't know. And one of them is dead.
How dare you?
Speaker 1 And New Delhi
Speaker 1
alone does not take away from that amazing legacy. That's right.
Diane Keaton's legacy.
Speaker 1 My one bounces off that legacy.
Speaker 1 Sister.
Speaker 1 I don't like it. This is a bombshell moment, I just want to say, on this popular latest.
Speaker 1 This is crazy to me. I'm like, is this how you guys do things? No.
Speaker 1
No. Emily gave Godfather 2 a one.
Oh, that's true. Did I?
Speaker 1
I think it's really similar to that. Wait, wait, wait.
Did you look that up just so you could have a defense? I did. I'm remembering similar times.
It was very low. It was taken low.
All right.
Speaker 1 Well, in that case,
Speaker 1 this is just that. This is just
Speaker 1 my
Speaker 1 thing. Anyways.
Speaker 1 it's made of my sandwich i'll take it off jordan i really want to have you back on our podcast and make you watch something's gotta give now because i i'm like let's do another diane keaton fancy kitchen all beige movie
Speaker 1 and let's see will that get a one as well i don't know i need to know now we gotta know um chelsea thank you so much for being here podstruck is a blast emily and i have both done it so if you're if you're headed over to Podstruck, you can check out our episodes first.
Speaker 1 Tell us more about the show, and is there anything else you want to plug? Oh,
Speaker 1 so Podstruck, it's called Podstruck a Rom-Com Rewind. We re-watch classic rom-coms to look at the good, the bad, and the totally sexist, all the things we were too love struck to see the first time.
Speaker 1 And we dunk on the movies out of love.
Speaker 1
And both of you guys are two of our favorite guests that we had in season one. And we're about to do season two.
No, it's real. It's real.
Speaker 1 So we can't wait to have you back.
Speaker 1 Other things to plug?
Speaker 1 No. No.
Speaker 1
Just the podcast. That's enough, I guess.
Come house sit for me and steal my stuff. I did it.
Speaker 1 Sitters.
Speaker 1 You were even drinking that.
Speaker 1
Listen, I washed the sheets. You could steal it if it's dusty.
I'm in the market for a new house sitter, so applications welcome. I'm
Speaker 1 no our dog loves emily too much so we have to have her back and i love the cat but the dog won't let me pet it
Speaker 1 sounds like a country song yeah
Speaker 1 uh emily you got anything to plug i'm gonna um go ahead and say the holidays are coming and i have a shop on etsy it's phlegm gems um jewelry and there's definitely going to be stuff available for the holidays coming up so keep your eyes out and uh yeah, Phlegmgems on Etsy.
Speaker 1 Yeah, I'm going to tell people to run to their local comic book store, pick up a copy of Predator, Black, White, and Blood number four.
Speaker 1 It's a Predator anthology with a story from me.
Speaker 1 And you're going to want to get in that pre-order for Venom 252. Another story from yours truly.
Speaker 1 And superstar artist, Jesus Sais.
Speaker 1
It's a backup story for Venom, but maybe it's kicking something off. I don't know.
If you want to be up on your Marvel Comics, maybe get yourself a copy of Venom 252 coming December 3rd.
Speaker 1 And if you are in the Southern California area,
Speaker 1
November 8th is a big day for seeing me. I'll be at the Burbank Book Festival and the Revenge of Comics and Pinball Comic Creators Block Party.
It's a long name. But I will be at both of those events.
Speaker 1 Check out social media for times, places, etc.
Speaker 1 Okay,
Speaker 1 tune in next week when our movie will be The Running Man 1987.
Speaker 1 Maximum Fun, a worker-owned network of artists-owned shows supported directly by you.