Body Dysmorphia | Girls Gone Bible

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Speaker 5 Okay.

Speaker 5 Speaking of body dysmorphia, let's cut the cameras so we don't see ourselves, maybe.

Speaker 5 What's up, Barb? What's up, BNG girl?

Speaker 5 People love it. It is a pretty.
Let's do it one more time. Oh, our hand.
It is pretty good. It's so solid.

Speaker 6 Let's do it. Our hand.

Speaker 5 Okay.

Speaker 6 And then we do it. We go like this for a few minutes, and then we just know to just casually let it go.

Speaker 5 One more time. Ready?

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Speaker 5 Well, you know.

Speaker 6 You know what I mean? You know what I mean? Is it because we're from the, like, we're from like the Rough Rider?

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Speaker 5 It is where we're from.

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Speaker 5 No idea.

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Speaker 6 You should have gotten me a cake.

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Speaker 6 Where's your cake? Where's my cake?

Speaker 5 You know why? Because it's later in the week. It felt like this week is Ari's birthday episode.

Speaker 6 I'm going to be 25.

Speaker 5 I'm going to be 25. I'm going to be 22.

Speaker 6 I can't believe it. Like 25.

Speaker 5 Crazy. You don't want to do older 20.

Speaker 5 Yeah.

Speaker 5 25 and we act like we're 15.

Speaker 5 15, huh? Yeah, okay. Oh my gosh, it's my baby's birthday week.
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Speaker 5 Yeah, yeah. And I remember everything in me goes, Yeah, we are.
I like that. And I don't even use that loosely at all.
Oh, it was so cute.

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Speaker 5 Speaking of body dysmorphia, yes, go ahead.

Speaker 5 So

Speaker 5 Ari and I

Speaker 5 listen, I know we had an episode on body image, but we wanted to come on and talk about something a little more specific. Body dysmorphia.

Speaker 5 It's something that we all go through. It's different for all of us.
I think every single person in the world goes through it.

Speaker 5 Obviously, there's different severities of it, but so I'm just going to read the definition of body dysmorphia.

Speaker 5 Body dysmorphia or body dysmorphic disorder, BDD, is a mental health condition where a person becomes excessively preoccupied with perceived flaws in their appearance, often seeing minor or even non-existent imperfections as severe and unsightly.

Speaker 5 These concerns may focus on specific body parts such as the skin, hair, nose, or other features and lead to intense distress.

Speaker 5 People with BDD may spend excessive time looking in mirrors, comparing themselves to others, seeking reassurance, or even undergoing cosmetic procedures to correct their perceived flaws.

Speaker 5 However, the relief from these actions is typically temporary and the preoccupation continues, often affecting social interactions, work, school, and overall quality of life.

Speaker 6 I do think we all have it,

Speaker 6 but I do believe that some people have it a lot worse and it's very undermined. And it's something to really take seriously.
80% of people...

Speaker 6 have suicidal thoughts or attempt to commit suicide from not feeling good, from seeing something in the mirror and it actually not being there, but feeling so bad about themselves.

Speaker 6 So it's something to really take very seriously, especially in today's age with social media and everything. It's gotten so bad.

Speaker 5 So bad, so bad. It plagues all of us.
It is,

Speaker 5 I say it all the time, it is the enemy's, one of his number one ways to distract us is to get us looking at ourselves all day long and being so preoccupied with what we look like, what other people think we look like.

Speaker 5 It becomes an idol for all of us. I know for me, you guys know some of my story.
Like this is something I've been dealing with, body dysmorphia my entire life. And

Speaker 5 it has

Speaker 5 been like, once I gained spiritual awareness and realized why this happens, I was like, oh, obviously, obviously. And like,

Speaker 5 he doesn't have anything new. He has nothing new, no new tactics.
Like, the only thing that he can do is the same thing our whole lives.

Speaker 5 He catches us when we're kids, finds out what a trigger is, finds out what our insecurity is, our trauma, what somebody said to us that that planted a seed.

Speaker 5 And then he spends the rest of his life, our lives, watering the seed of what somebody else said to us. And so for me, I know that somebody must have said something to me when I was a kid.

Speaker 5 Somebody must have become...

Speaker 5 Somebody must have made me become aware of my body at a really young age. And then the devil literally was like, oh, perfect.
I got it. It all starts when you're a kid because you're so vulnerable.

Speaker 5 Yes.

Speaker 6 It all starts when we were kids. Yeah.
And I think, yeah, like you said, it all, either something was said to you, what was your home life look like? Were you constantly ridiculed by your parents?

Speaker 6 Were you super bullied at school? Like, it's all these kinds of things that start when we're kids.

Speaker 5 Always, always. And like,

Speaker 5 social media has,

Speaker 5 I mean, one of the, one of the, God's commands is don't covet. What does that mean? It means don't, don't want what somebody else has.
Don't want what somebody else has.

Speaker 5 And so when you're sitting there comparing yourself on social media all day, like you're literally sinning, like you're looking at somebody else's life, their body, what God gave them, how God created them, and being like, I want that.

Speaker 5 Why can't I be like that? When God is like, but I made you, you, yeah, and I made you so intentionally. Yeah.
And like, these are cliches we hear all the time. But I don't know, there's so much.

Speaker 5 I mean, I was taking a bath the other day and I was thinking about body dysmorphia and I was just thinking about the things that we go through as men and women. And I was thinking about how

Speaker 5 I was just thinking about about how you can look in the mirror and legitimately see something that's not there.

Speaker 5 Like, how is it that our actual physical, like we know that the devil perverts and distorts our emotional eyes and our spiritual eyes? We see things not as they are. He lies to us.

Speaker 5 He creates deception. Like, he just lies.
That's what he does. He lies.
And then I was thinking about.

Speaker 5 It's not just limited to our emotional life and our spiritual life. He has the ability to distort our physical eyes as well, to see something that's not there.

Speaker 5 I'm literally sitting and I'm thinking about: is there anything in scripture that speaks to body dysmorphia? Are there any stories? Like, is there anyone who dealt with it?

Speaker 5 And then I immediately thought of the moment with Leah and Rachel. We've talked about Jacob, Leah, and Rachel, how Jacob was deceived by Laban to marry.

Speaker 5 He wanted to marry Rachel and then he ended up marrying her sister Leah. He got to marry Rachel, however, 14 years later.

Speaker 5 But when Jacob married Leah, it literally says that it basically insinuates that Rachel was so much more beautiful than Leah. Jacob loved Rachel.
He didn't love Leah.

Speaker 5 And it says that Leah had weak eyes.

Speaker 5 And so often people interpret this as being like either she had, she just wasn't as beautiful. Some people are like, maybe she had a lazy eye.
Maybe there was just something wrong with her eyes.

Speaker 5 And then I was thinking about how Leah's whole issue, like she would spend the next however long of her life trying to make Jacob love her.

Speaker 5 Like she would have his children, she would have all these children. Okay, maybe now he'll love me.
Maybe now he'll respect me. Maybe now he'll desire me more than my sister.

Speaker 5 And then Leah, you realize like Leah has such low self-worth.

Speaker 5 Like she looks in the mirror and she clearly hates what she sees because she just feels like she needs to do more and be more in order to be loved.

Speaker 5 And so when it says she has weak eyes, I interpret it as like she can't even see herself correctly.

Speaker 5 Like she has such low self-worth because her eyes are weak her eye her vision has been distorted and so I just think it's such an interesting take on it because I was like wow this is literally what happens to us like the devil has the ability to pervert our eyesight so we look in the mirror and we get fixated on these little things these like little minuscule imperfections or flaws or sometimes things that literally aren't even there.

Speaker 5 There are women and people and men who look in the mirror and they see a body that isn't actually there.

Speaker 5 And this has been so much of my story of like, I know sometimes, and it's not nearly as bad now. It was way worse growing up, way like in high school, it was the worst it had ever been.

Speaker 5 Where I'd look in the mirror and I'd be like, I'm five foot six, I'm 115 pounds. It's so unhealthy for my build.

Speaker 5 And I'm looking in the mirror and I am seeing someone who is much larger than what is actually there.

Speaker 6 There are so many girls that are going through this. You and I have complete opposite body dysmorphias, but

Speaker 6 like, can you talk about that? Because

Speaker 6 I know so many girls are struggling with that.

Speaker 5 Yeah.

Speaker 6 So many. I didn't realize how many girls struggle with body, like body weight dysmorphia.

Speaker 6 It's so serious too.

Speaker 5 It's so weird because it's just like,

Speaker 5 yeah, I mean, listen, it's so hard to come on here and talk about something that you haven't fully conquered yet.

Speaker 5 The only thing that I know about this situation is that I can look at it emotionally and be like, yes, clearly somebody made me aware of myself and my body at a young age, and it stuck with me.

Speaker 5 And I've taken it on as a part of my identity. You know what I mean? Spiritually, I know you can take it back to the garden.

Speaker 5 You can take it back when we were made in the image of God and we were made to live a beautiful life of truth where we the devil would have had no opening to come and feed us lies about ourselves.

Speaker 5 But because Adam and Eve, they fell, they ate from the tree of knowledge of good and evil. They then see themselves.
You see, even in the beginning, that their vision got distorted.

Speaker 5 After deception came in, they ran and they tried to cover themselves with fig leaves because they realized their vision had changed before they saw themselves as naked and holy and blameless and unashamed, and they didn't have to be ashamed.

Speaker 5 And then their perception changed, their vision changed, and the devil had influence in the way that they saw themselves. And then, so they had to cover themselves.

Speaker 5 It's just perversion of like God's original design. And so I know all day long we're fed lies from the enemy.
I know all day long he's feeding me lies.

Speaker 5 He's making me like, it's just, he's sitting there being like, Angela has so much to do. She has so much purpose.

Speaker 5 she has so much like she has a calling on her life from god like every single person watching this does we all have a calling and his main goal is to discourage us and is to throw us off course and one of the mass the massive ways he does that is getting us to look at our bodies and fixate on things that either don't matter or aren't there and so sometimes yeah you look in the mirror and i'm like you know what i'll i i said this i think in the body image episode but i'll look at myself and I can tell, and it usually comes when I'm tired, when I'm run down, after shows, after big ministry stuff, like when I'm super vulnerable, that I'll look in the mirror and I have to be so careful because I'll be like, I know what I'm seeing right now doesn't actually exist.

Speaker 5 Like I know for a fact.

Speaker 5 Our whole purpose in having this episode is so that you guys don't feel like you're alone. I don't want you to feel like you're crazy.
I don't want you to feel like there's something wrong with you.

Speaker 5 I just don't want you to feel like you're the only person that feels this way because we all go through it. We all look in the mirror and pick ourselves apart.

Speaker 5 And the truth is a life with Jesus like can help that. Body dysmorphia is a mental health condition that can be treated like anything else, like anxiety, like depression.

Speaker 5 But I truly believe that this is something like everything else we teach you guys about taking your thoughts captive, about having the mind of Christ, about letting Jesus be sovereign Lord over your mind and over your thoughts.

Speaker 5 This applies to this as well. You know what I mean? Like, you can invite Jesus to help you with these thoughts as well.
Yeah.

Speaker 6 Where are you at now?

Speaker 5 I'm probably going to start going to counseling.

Speaker 5 I just think that, you know,

Speaker 5 you know what it is.

Speaker 5 There's like, this is just another even deeper layer of

Speaker 5 sin or idolatry because body dysmorphia, it's like a form of idolatry, like sitting there and staring and being like, and again, it's gotten so much better.

Speaker 5 It's a weird thing because where I used to be versus where I'm at now, it's like, you can't, it's indescribable the difference.

Speaker 5 Like, I really have great days, great weeks, even great months where it's not nearly as severe.

Speaker 5 But I think one of the reasons I'm even willing, even though it's gotten so much better and getting better, and that is the truth, like with Jesus, I do have the ability to

Speaker 5 take the thoughts captive, to recognize what's going on. Like I'm being deceived right now and I'm giving way too much attention to something that doesn't matter and I'm making an idol out of it.

Speaker 5 The reason why I'm willing, even as it's getting better, to go to counseling is because I have an even deeper awareness that like

Speaker 5 this area of my life, it's hindering me.

Speaker 5 Like it's getting in the way of what God wants to do. And

Speaker 5 excuse I have overcome alcoholism. I have overcome panic attacks.
I have overcome sin, all types of sin. I've overcome so much.
And this is just one more thing of

Speaker 5 we make excuses, we justify our issues, we justify mental health disorders, and we partner with them because sometimes our issues, not only do they feel familiar, so we're like, it's comforting because this is all I've ever known.

Speaker 5 We also partner with things that seemingly benefit us.

Speaker 6 What do you mean?

Speaker 5 Body dysmorphia, disordered eating.

Speaker 5 The enemy can make it so in my mind that I believe that this is beneficial. It keeps me thin.

Speaker 5 It keeps me pretty. It keeps me whatever.
I'll justify it in my head and I'll be like, well,

Speaker 5 at least I'm fit. At least I go to the gym a lot.
At least, you know what I mean?

Speaker 5 And God has really revealed to me, like, it's getting in the way of what I want you to do. Like, it's like, I just...

Speaker 6 You make an idol out of it.

Speaker 5 It is so an idol. It is so an idol.

Speaker 5 Yeah. And then you justify it and you're like, oh, but is it really that bad? Because here's the benefit of it on this end.
And it's like with so many different types of things. And, and, like,

Speaker 5 I don't like making idols of, like, you don't really make idols of things because you're like, oh, this is evil. And I'm going to partner with evil.
Like, idols are good things.

Speaker 5 Like, you make idols out of things that you love, that feel good, that comfort you. You know what I mean?

Speaker 5 It is

Speaker 5 just a

Speaker 6 journey.

Speaker 5 It is a, it is so a journey.

Speaker 6 It's a journey. And to think that there's people that are like, man, I have Jesus, but I have not overcome this.
Yeah. And hearing you, it's like, no, you have Jesus, but it's a journey.

Speaker 6 And you have to work hard. And you're going to get therapy and you're going to keep praying on it.
And it's important that people know that because

Speaker 6 some people may feel defeated having Jesus in their life and still having this thing that's been such a burden, right?

Speaker 5 It's so true. Yeah.
I mean, there are moments where I think too, like, God,

Speaker 5 how, how, how do we overcome so much? But this is, right. And he so gently is like, this is so deeply ingrained in your brain and your DNA.

Speaker 5 It's passed down generation from generation of women who have been hyper-fixated on the way that they look. And it's been like, it's been the same plan from the devil from the very beginning.

Speaker 5 And so I give myself so much grace in this area to know that like, you know, it really, truly is a journey.

Speaker 5 And I just encourage you guys, like, our whole point in all of this is because I want you to know you're not alone. I'm in it with you.
And guess what?

Speaker 5 I've had conversations with older women that I respect so much.

Speaker 5 Because there are moments where I kind of like feel weak, where I'll be like, oh, if I really was strong and tough and a warrior for Jesus, like I wouldn't struggle with this.

Speaker 5 How could I let something so superficial and surface level and vain and whatever get me down?

Speaker 5 And then I talk to these older women that I respect so much, who are like mighty, powerful women of God, and they're like, Hey, I am 50 years old and I'm still walking through this.

Speaker 5 You know what I mean? So you're so right. It's a journey and it's something that I, one of my main pieces of advice is just fix your eyes on Jesus.
Like

Speaker 5 the devil's plan is to get us to look inward, is to focus on ourselves, is to make an idol out of these things and to get our eyes off of Jesus.

Speaker 5 But as scripture says, he will keep those in perfect peace whose minds are fixed on him. So if we fix our eyes on Jesus, that's where peace comes from.

Speaker 5 And that's where, like, that's the only way you can fight this thing.

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Speaker 5 It's free.

Speaker 6 I know a lot of Christians like

Speaker 6 don't believe in therapy. You know that, right?

Speaker 5 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 5 And therapy is, is, is one of the greatest things you can ever do because these are, these are specialists that have like, who know how to, how to beat this thing yeah it's something that you have to be aware of and and choose to process and be willing to let god heal i know for a long time i wasn't letting god heal like how many stories in the bible are do people like have to partner with jesus when he goes to heal them like he says to the guy at the pool of um at bethesda do you want to be made well and so many other situations who where he's like do you want this are you willing yeah like you have to meet me and for the longest time, I was partnering with an idol.

Speaker 5 I was partnering with something that was hurting me and hindering me in my relationship with Jesus. And so now I'm like, okay, my first step, and I am on this with me too.
I am in this me too.

Speaker 5 I am on this journey with you. Of like, okay, our first step is to recognize what's going on and be like, sure, this isn't,

Speaker 5 you know, outwardly harmful and sinful and evil, but it's not good it's an idol it is sinful and it is just

Speaker 5 and and that's like the devil sorry I keep talking about the devil but it that's what it is but and he does these things where it's like these small things that aren't Do I have something? No.

Speaker 5 Oh, we take care of the big sin. We take care of the big issues, alcoholism, blah, blah, blah, all these little things.

Speaker 5 But he's wreaking havoc in our lives through this one little opening that doesn't seem that bad. Yeah.

Speaker 5 And like this is one of those areas where finally God has just confronted me so much and been like, I want this I want you to give this to me. I want to do this with you.

Speaker 5 I want you to stop benefiting off of something that's hurting you.

Speaker 6 Yeah, having people to talk things out with we it is just it's everything. Yeah.

Speaker 5 So how do you

Speaker 5 yeah, we're different. Body dysmorphia is also, by the way, not just body.
It is with face. It's with hair.
It's with everything. And so do you want to talk a little bit about how you feel

Speaker 5 you've been personally affected?

Speaker 6 Well, I definitely have hair dysmorphia. Let's just get that on the table.

Speaker 5 I think no, I really do.

Speaker 6 Like, it's a real thing. Yeah.

Speaker 5 I have

Speaker 6 I Started to get haircuts. Like, I love a fresh haircut.
And I became so obsessed with it. I was getting haircuts every two weeks.
And my hair girl was like, are there something wrong?

Speaker 5 When I first met you,

Speaker 5 you got your haircut every two weeks. I thought it was the I was like,

Speaker 5 I was like, and like, I didn't know you that well yet. So I couldn't wait until we got close enough where I could be like, hey,

Speaker 5 you okay? No, I'm serious. It's really crazy.
It's so real, though. It's so real.

Speaker 6 This is good for, because I know a lot of young girls listen to us. When I was younger, I just like never felt accepted.
And so

Speaker 6 I started wearing makeup and coloring my hair blonde.

Speaker 6 I got a little bit of attention. And so I would put all my

Speaker 6 identity into that, into getting attention, because that's how I thought I was accepted. So I became so fixated and so obsessed with it.
And

Speaker 6 I became so obsessed with it that if I didn't, if I didn't get a compliment or something, I thought something was wrong with me. And so I

Speaker 6 almost like

Speaker 6 Something happened in high school where I became even more insecure. And I was just talking to my mom about this this morning.
I was like, do you remember I always wore hats?

Speaker 6 So I always wore hats because it covered half of my face. I couldn't show half of my face.
I was so insecure. I always looked down.
I would be in the car.

Speaker 6 And if I saw like kids my age in a store, I would wait till they leave because I was so insecure to go in the store.

Speaker 6 I even left school. I was just very insecure, very insecure on my appearance.
I was so obsessed with it because that's how I felt accepted. Totally.
It was only by my appearance.

Speaker 6 And it goes back to your childhood.

Speaker 6 You know, did you come from very loving parents where they didn't make everything about your appearance?

Speaker 6 Were you told something as a kid? Did you go through abuse? Because abuse is a big one.

Speaker 6 Abuse can make you feel like you're not good enough. And then you become fixated on something of appearance.
And then

Speaker 6 social media came out, and I,

Speaker 6 I would constantly just sit there and compare myself to these models and girls. And, and then I wanted to be like that, and then I wasn't like that.
And that was really confusing.

Speaker 6 Um, and then when I started to model,

Speaker 6 That was a whole other lane.

Speaker 5 I, oh, good luck, you know,

Speaker 5 you are

Speaker 6 you're in audition rooms with the most beautiful girls. You don't book the job because a girl that looks like you gets it and you're constantly nitpicking.

Speaker 5 Oh, that's miserable.

Speaker 6 And I just became just so insecure. And I was just wearing more makeup and my hair.
And it's, and then it just takes away from you.

Speaker 6 You just think that's your, that's your whole identity is the way you look. And

Speaker 6 even if I didn't like something on my face, if I didn't look good, I would just stay in and I just wouldn't go out.

Speaker 6 and it really took over my life it really did and then we started Girls Gone Bible and that was a whole other thing for me we had to be on camera and you know what I had to go through I there were times where I couldn't even look at myself on camera I was so

Speaker 6 I was like I would get really upset some days and I was just like, oh my God, I can't look at myself. I can't, I can't do it.

Speaker 6 It even, I almost like let the enemy even make me not be on Girls Comp Bible because I was like, I can't do this. Like, I don't want to watch myself, you know? And so that's been a journey for me

Speaker 6 of

Speaker 6 just self-appearance and learning to love myself, learning to

Speaker 6 not have to do all these things to feel good. And I see so many of like I see

Speaker 6 so many of us, we're just constantly comparing, constantly feeling like we have have to do this and that to our face in order to feel good. We have to wear all this makeup.

Speaker 6 I mean, I never could go out without makeup on. Like never.
Like I would never go out of the house without makeup.

Speaker 6 I felt like I had to just do all these things to just feel good,

Speaker 6 you know?

Speaker 6 And so

Speaker 6 I, on my journey, on my faith journey,

Speaker 6 what's really helped me is just understanding how like God looks at everything else but the appearance. He looks at the heart.
And that's been so big for me

Speaker 6 because

Speaker 6 like I know I talk about David a lot, but look at how, look at why David was so anointed because of his heart and because he was so confident in God, not in himself.

Speaker 6 And so that's been so huge for me to be like.

Speaker 6 Jesus loves our heart. He looks at our heart and like what we do for others and how good right here we are.

Speaker 6 And so he's helped me see my heart so much on my faith journey. And it's been, it's made me love myself so much.
And then like I always say, like, I see how much he loves me.

Speaker 6 And it's just helped me feel so accepted with myself.

Speaker 5 Yeah, totally.

Speaker 6 I know we're going to get comments being like, but you guys wear makeup on the podcast. We're girls and we love to get dressed up and we love to wear makeup and all that.

Speaker 6 But I feel like I've gotten so much better with that too. Like just accepting myself, not having to.
I mean, we go out all the time. We're like, God, should we even be going out?

Speaker 5 Listen, I,

Speaker 5 one thing about me is God has really done a work in me. It's absolutely incredible.
I will.

Speaker 5 I wear makeup on here and I do my hair on here, but like 90% of the time, I don't look any, you know what I mean? Yeah.

Speaker 6 You know what I'm going to say too, guys? It's when you're so young, like when you're in high school, when you're, it is so to love yourself. Yeah,

Speaker 6 because we're so young, we're like, these are the our young 20s, where these are the years like we're learning about ourselves. And it's really, and then we're in high school, they're bullies.

Speaker 6 Like, so I would kill someone that bullied you.

Speaker 5 I would literally, but you went through it too.

Speaker 6 Girls are vicious. And so

Speaker 6 I just, I can only imagine what some of you guys go through like with the girls and in high school. And so

Speaker 6 I know how hard it is, even being a kid on social media now.

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Speaker 6 Here's what I'll say, even for the young girls in high school. I want you to understand how much Jesus loves you.

Speaker 6 And what I have realized on my journey is that God has made no mistakes when he made us.

Speaker 6 I, you look at the picture, perfect girl. I always looked at the models, whatever it is.
And who says that's perfect? It's society. God did not make any mistakes when he made us.

Speaker 6 I love the little quirks about me now that I used to absolutely despise. There's things that, like, I am now loving.
Now that I'm getting older, I'm realizing that God has made us all so different.

Speaker 6 I saw a girl the other day and she had walked into this restaurant. And, and, you know, society would probably be like, oh, I don't know, like whatever society says is so beautiful.

Speaker 6 But she walked in and she was glowing. She had her shoulders back.
She was smiling. She was

Speaker 6 looking at people in the eyes. And I was like, wow, that girl is just so beautiful.
Like there's something about her. And it's how, who, who, it's what God says about you.
It's how you carry yourself.

Speaker 6 It's, it's, it's what your heart is. That's what makes you beautiful.
And then we live in LA and we will see someone walk in and they will be what society says is beautiful, right?

Speaker 6 But they won't be good right here and they just won't even like talk to you. And then you look at them in such a different light.
And so.

Speaker 6 So true.

Speaker 6 I don't know what society is saying is so beautiful, but let me tell you, and I don't care how cliche I sound, your heart and how you carry yourself and how beautiful you are right here will literally glow without.

Speaker 6 So

Speaker 5 you, you mentioned it earlier about how like you went through this your whole life of like, whatever, all of the issues.

Speaker 5 And then you got into modeling and then it just like got a thousand times, a million times worse, obviously.

Speaker 5 And I'm thinking about how like models, supermodels are the most conventionally attractive people on the planet. And they are.
without a doubt, the most insecure. And why is that?

Speaker 5 You might be somebody who, I know you're beautiful.

Speaker 5 I know that you're beautiful, and but you might feel like you're not conventionally pretty, like you're not attractive, like you're not a supermodel.

Speaker 5 And most of us aren't, by the way, most of us aren't super models. Most of us don't wake up in the morning looking like a 10 out of 10.
I know we don't sometimes. Like, and that's true.

Speaker 5 You'll look in the, we'll wake up to do that and be like, Did we get into a fight? Like, I'd be like, What is that? No, literally. And so,

Speaker 5 but, and so you might be someone who's like, no, I would be confident if I was that beautiful. And I'm telling you right now, it's not the truth.

Speaker 5 Because when you are, when you go into like the next level of beauty, like when you are so physically attractive, so beautiful, it puts that much more attention, that much more pressure, and

Speaker 5 just attention on your physical appearance, which means that you have to live up to a standard that nobody can live up to.

Speaker 5 And then, if you've put so much attention on your physical appearance, the enemy has all the more right to then go attack that and

Speaker 5 distort your perception and your vision. And then you see things that aren't there.

Speaker 5 But because you've given it so much emphasis and so much of value, when you put so much of value on the way you look, you are so vulnerable to the enemy just like destroying you in that area.

Speaker 5 Whereas if you are not as attractive, but you know that you're smart, you know that you're gifted, you know that you're kind and you're good to people. It's what you put the value on.

Speaker 5 And in entering a relationship with Jesus, I know I have this body stuff and the eating and the whatever,

Speaker 5 but I will say God has done such an unbelievable work in what I put my value in. And he's made me realize like he's made me love the things about me that he loves.
Yeah.

Speaker 5 He's made me so aware, like, this is awesome. Yes, yes.

Speaker 5 And it doesn't really get you anywhere does it and yes is there pretty privilege absolutely and do you benefit in society when you are more attractive in some ways absolutely we're not going to pretend like that's not the truth equally it hinders you

Speaker 5 and So in relationship with Jesus, like he's made me so aware of like my gifts and my little things. And like, do you see this little thing?

Speaker 5 I was so intentional when I made you and I made you this way. And I actually love this about you.

Speaker 5 And, you know, and it's made me like, yes, of course we care about how we look, but at the same time, I put so much, I know that that's not why I'm valuable.

Speaker 5 I know that the man that I marry one day, like, sure, he's going to want me to be attractive, but he doesn't have to.

Speaker 5 Deal with attraction 24 hours a day. He has to deal with what's in here and what's in here and what comes out of here.
This is what matters. It really is.

Speaker 6 And it's like society, especially for us women, has put all this pressure on us.

Speaker 6 I would love to give you guys some little tools. Yeah.
Let's talk about, because we have so many, it's funny.

Speaker 6 I will look in the crowd at our shows and I'm seeing the types of people that come, which is literally everyone. We have girls at age seven to, you know, 65, mothers and daughters.
It's, it's true.

Speaker 5 Men, it's when the guys are there.

Speaker 6 But

Speaker 6 I want to speak about, I want to speak to the moms. Oh.
I want to speak because it's so, you have no idea the impact that you hold with your child.

Speaker 6 For parents, it is so important how we speak to our children because you don't realize as vulnerable children, when you say one little thing, they can hold that and take it with them as their adults.

Speaker 6 So

Speaker 6 they will. And so be very careful at how you speak to your children.

Speaker 6 Kids that are in high school, I know that kids are bullies. I know that we can't help, we can't stop kids from saying things to us.
And that's why we need to have a good group of community.

Speaker 6 We need to know who Jesus is. We need to know the scripture that you keep saying, I am fearfully, wonderfully made.
Change your perspective on how you look at yourself. As a man thinks, so he is.

Speaker 6 Let's try to change how we look at ourselves. So we can, so let's look at this perspective.
So I'll look in the mirror and I'll say, oh my gosh, look at my hair. Oh, I have a pimple on my face.

Speaker 6 I'm so ugly. Or we can look in the mirror and say, I'm beautiful.
It's okay that I have a pimple. Jesus loves me.
Jesus made me just the way I am. He made no mistakes when he made me.

Speaker 6 I'm going to make the decision today to love myself and carry that.

Speaker 6 And when the thought comes in that I'm not good enough, that I'm not, that I'm not pretty or whatever it is that you're struggling with, my body, I'm going to make the decision today to say, no, I'm not.

Speaker 6 No, I'm not. And not today, Satan.
I love myself and so doesn't Jesus. He made me exactly.
He knew when he had me in my mother's womb exactly what he was doing. So I want to try to do that.

Speaker 6 And also, I want you to write down every single lie that the enemy is

Speaker 6 writing down. And like, I want you to really say, is this true? This isn't true.

Speaker 6 Because any thought that is negative does not come from God. So we need to, we need to remember that.
So any thoughts that aren't pleasing don't come from God.

Speaker 6 And that's helped me so much on my journey of negative thinking.

Speaker 6 And then what else? Do you have any?

Speaker 5 I love, can I just really quick say I love what you said about the parents and about how you shape your kids with your words. Whatever you speak over them is who they will become.

Speaker 5 As a parent, your voice becomes their inner voice. So however you speak to them is how they'll speak to themselves.

Speaker 5 If they hear you saying, oh i'm fat oh i'm this oh i'm ugly your kid is gonna pick that i had when i'm i was thinking about this topic today i was just thinking about like i have to heal so that my daughter never has to deal with what i deal with my daughter will never hear me speak like that i know she will never hear me put myself down and i just yeah what ari said i Another thing you can bring, how to bring Jesus into it is be like, Jesus, you give me eyes to see.

Speaker 5 You show me how to feel.

Speaker 5 You show me what to think what do you say about me who do you say that I am what do you think about how I look and just like Ari said you look in the mirror you have a pimple be like what up your words are everything you decide how you feel through your words and even if you look in the mirror and say oh I hate what I see look at it and be just say the opposite and see what changes in your spirit like subconsciously it all begins to change just because of your body will begin to react to the things that you're saying so if you look in the mirror and be like I look good today, I look so good.

Speaker 5 Like if I ever look, feel like I look a little thick that day or like whatever, I look and be like, I'm thick and I look good and I love the way I look and I love my curves and I love, you know what I mean?

Speaker 5 And I really do that sometimes. And it helps me so much.
And it's just about the way that you speak to yourself and choose to be like, you know what?

Speaker 5 God really does say that I am absolutely beautiful. And even toxic positivity isn't a good thing.

Speaker 5 And so if you really, I don't want you guys to sit there and be like painfully having to say that you love something when you really don't, but you can sit there and be like, you know what?

Speaker 5 This is my reality today. I don't 100% love the way that I look.
It's too hard for me to look in the mirror and say I love myself because I know that it's not true. And so it's not doing anything.

Speaker 5 So you can be like, you know what? There are things that I don't love and maybe I can change them. Maybe I can't.

Speaker 5 Maybe there are steps that you can take towards bettering yourself, which by the way, your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit.

Speaker 5 And so it is something to take care of and to treat well and to put good, nourishing food in your body that will make you feel good and that will reflect on the outside what it's doing on the inside, which is feeding you well and nourishing you.

Speaker 5 And so you can look in the mirror and be like, you know what? I don't love it all right now, but I'll...

Speaker 5 Focus on the things that I do love. I'm a really good friend.
I'm really funny.

Speaker 5 People are joyful around me because I bring in good energy and like, you know what I mean?

Speaker 5 And just focusing on the good, you have, you do have a decision that you can make to be like, I don't love anything. And guess what?

Speaker 5 Can I please just encourage you in telling you that we are all insecure. We all have things that we want to change.

Speaker 5 And what should comfort you is knowing that nobody, if you've put on 10 pounds, I promise you nobody cares. If they're, if you have pimples, I promise you nobody cares.

Speaker 5 You are the only one that looks at yourself that much because guess what? If they're not looking at Jesus, they're looking at themselves too. They're not looking at you.
Nobody actually cares.

Speaker 5 It's so true.

Speaker 6 And I love that you say that because

Speaker 6 this month is all about gratitude. I am just so grateful for everyone in my life.
I really am, but there's just one person that I don't thank enough, and it's myself.

Speaker 6 It's sometimes hard to remind ourselves that we are trying our best to make sense of everything. And in the crazy world we're living in, it just isn't easy.

Speaker 6 Here's a reminder to send some thanks to the people in your life, including yourself.

Speaker 6 I will never stop talking about BetterHelp because if you guys only knew how much it helped me in my faith journey, one of the greatest things about BetterHelp is it's so easy. It's so convenient.

Speaker 6 You go online, you say what your experience is, and then from your experience, they match you with the perfect therapist.

Speaker 6 So I would just encourage anyone that needs to just unload their baggage of what they've been holding on so tightly. BetterHelp just been the greatest blessing for me.

Speaker 6 So if you're thinking of starting therapy, give BetterHelp a try. It's entirely online, designed to be convenient, flexible, and suited to your schedule.

Speaker 6 Just fill out a brief questionnaire to get matched up with the licensed therapist and switch therapists at any time for no additional charge. Let the gratitude flow, you guys, with BetterHelp.

Speaker 6 Visit betterhelp.com/slash girlsgone Bible today to get 10% off your first month. That's helph.com slash girlsgone Bible.

Speaker 6 Really? Everybody's worried about themselves and girls that feel like they can't go out of the house without makeup. I want to give you an exercise.
Take off all your makeup.

Speaker 6 I want you to go into a store and you will see that nobody cares, that nobody's like, just really, just try it. Nobody's going to ridicule you.

Speaker 6 know it's it's it's such it's all in it's all right here and it's not real it's not real

Speaker 6 um

Speaker 5 can we tell you guys the one body this morning oh yeah we do have okay so ari and i listen this is something that i knew got to break off because i have partnered with it this is

Speaker 5 we can't let go of lip liner lip liner like i don't have to wear makeup but the one thing i want lip liner don't tell me if i you guys when i die one day i'm holding everyone accountable.

Speaker 5 If you don't put lip liner on me in the casket, we're done.

Speaker 6 Lip liner, I want a bow, and I want a Reformation dress with the bangs, okay?

Speaker 5 Oh, I will dyson the bangs. Yes, dyson the bangs.
Gotcha. Okay, I would never.

Speaker 5 I'll be like, oh, my friend, hang on, hang on. We need the rolling.

Speaker 5 You know, I'm going to open one eye and my casket and be like, thanks, girl.

Speaker 5 We have to tell you guys the funniest story. So one time, Ari and I are dating.
Okay, so we dated. We

Speaker 5 dated best friends

Speaker 5 and

Speaker 5 we would obviously like all hang out the four of us would double date and everything and Ari and I would constantly go to the bathroom

Speaker 5 because we would go put lip liner on and we didn't want them to know we wanted them to always think we have lip liner on

Speaker 5 and so we would always go and sneak the lip liner and we come back one time and what did they say one of them goes he goes why you guys keep sneaking to put a lip liner on i look at him so embarrassed.

Speaker 6 I go, No, I'm not.

Speaker 5 And I literally go, What are you talking about?

Speaker 5 My lips.

Speaker 5 I'm literally like, I'm literally like, What are you talking about? Like, why do you even notice stuff like that? Like, guys, don't do that. Like, guys, we were so embarrassed.

Speaker 5 What do you mean?

Speaker 5 Listen, I don't care. I don't care how healed I am from my body to Scorpio.
I will never be healed from not putting lip liner on. I will never.
I have partnered with it for life. I want lip liner on.

Speaker 5 It just make like it may I don't it's evidently

Speaker 5 been there.

Speaker 5 Anyways,

Speaker 6 like Angela said, the enemy wants to keep you defeated, stuck, have no purpose. And one of his tactics to do that is to keep you focusing on self.
Yes.

Speaker 6 If we just let go of focusing on ourselves and remember that God looks at everything but that.

Speaker 6 He loves the heart. So what do we do to not focus on ourselves? Focus on helping others.
I will continue to preach this.

Speaker 6 When we stop focusing so much on self, it may actually, we realize, wait a minute, why have I been so fixated on these things? Like, Jesus, Jesus loves my heart. Let me help somebody else.

Speaker 6 And that's going to actually make me love myself more. And so, that is one of the biggest ways.
If you want to love yourself more, love others, help others.

Speaker 5 Whoa. whoa.

Speaker 6 She just literally clapped her neck.

Speaker 5 Oh my God.

Speaker 5 Did you guys hear that? I'm so sorry.

Speaker 6 That was crazy.

Speaker 6 During my faith journey, really,

Speaker 6 what I don't even like, what has just completely

Speaker 6 let me let go of all the

Speaker 6 stuff is just really helping others. And I'll just say one more thing.

Speaker 6 Social media has destroyed lives. It has really taken girls' self-esteem and put it to the ground.
We're seeing

Speaker 6 these edited photos. We're seeing girls making all this money.
We just don't feel adequate.

Speaker 6 And I want to let you know, as two sisters that live in Los Angeles, that have been in the entertainment industry for years and years,

Speaker 6 if we can tell you one thing, it's this. It's not real.

Speaker 6 I can't believe how many years I wasted comparing myself to girls. It wasn't real.

Speaker 6 They are all struggling with the same thing. These photos are, it's just, it's all a big facade.
And so you're wasting days, you're wasting hours, comparing yourself to things that aren't even real.

Speaker 6 Totally.

Speaker 6 Work on your heart. Just work on your heart posture.

Speaker 6 Work on being the best person you can be right here, and then you will flourish. Yeah.

Speaker 6 And that will be the most pleasing thing to Jesus.

Speaker 5 She preached it. She said it.
Take her words and just let them take root in your heart. If you are new to Girls Gone Bible, we obviously believe in Jesus here.

Speaker 5 Jesus has saved our lives. He has absolutely radically saved and transformed both Ari and I's life.
And we always want to end these episodes

Speaker 5 with the option for you to receive Jesus if you never have because

Speaker 5 there's healing on the other side of a relationship with Jesus. There is help from the Holy Spirit that Jesus left us with.

Speaker 5 There's the Holy Spirit who is our helper who can minister to us, comfort us, and begin to speak truth into the lies that we believe. When you don't have Jesus, you are defenseless.

Speaker 5 And I don't know if you come from a different background or a different faith or a different whatever where

Speaker 5 you think that there could be other ways and other ways of believing. We're here to tell you and testify that it's just Jesus.
Jesus is the only way. He's the name above all names.

Speaker 5 He is the only way to God. He's the only way that you can be reconciled to the Father.
And so we want to invite you guys today to receive the greatest gift of all time. And it's free.

Speaker 5 And that's salvation. And just like sin entered the world through one man, Adam, so much more does grace abound for all of us through one man, Jesus Christ.
So I want to invite you to pray with us.

Speaker 5 The implications of saying this prayer are eternal.

Speaker 5 The healing that can come from a relationship that will come from a relationship with Jesus is unmatched. He healed us, like he legitimately healed us.
So I want to invite you to say this with me.

Speaker 5 Heavenly Father, I believe the scripture that says that Jesus Christ is your eternal son. I believe he went to the cross and died for my sins.
I confess to you that I'm a sinner.

Speaker 5 I need your forgiveness. I'm asking you to save me.
I'm trusting you to do it right now.

Speaker 5 I accept the forgiveness of my sins. I accept your gift of salvation.
I accept you as my personal Savior. Fill me with your Holy Spirit and be the Lord of my life.
In Jesus' name, amen.

Speaker 5 If you just said that prayer for the first time, we love you so much.

Speaker 5 And I just pray that Jesus himself would just flood your heart with his love right now, that you'd receive the love of the Father, that you would have the Holy Spirit immediately come and comfort you, comfort your soul, that he would rebuke the storm in your mind and say, peace be still.

Speaker 5 And that whatever thoughts arise that are against you, that you would immediately know they're not from you and they're not from God.

Speaker 5 And I just pray that you would overcome even the most horrific body dysmorphia and whatever other issues you might be dealing with. We love you guys so much.
May the Lord bless you and keep you.

Speaker 5 May He make His face to shine upon you and be gracious to you. May He turn His face towards you and give you peace.

Speaker 5 We love you. Shalom, Shalom.

Speaker 6 Shalom, Shalom.

Speaker 5 I feel the the Holy Ghost.