Episode 238: Can You Really Manifest Your Way To Success?

18m
Do you believe in manifestation?

In this solo episode of Habits and Hustle, we chat about how some components of manifestation are helpful in one’s self-development journey, while others are detrimental.

Too many people fall into the trap of believing that their thoughts alone can bring them riches - but the reality is that thoughts don’t do the work for you - only you can.

What we discuss:

01:28: Does manifestation work?
03:58: Do we overestimate how much control we have?
08:24: Is manifesting self-care?
10:02: Is the coaching industry giving manifesting a bad wrap?
14:40: How can you avoid getting scammed by a coach in this industry?

Key takeaways:

There is value in visualizing yourself achieving success, but these thoughts are not enough to experience success in real life. You must put in the work and take action.

Manifestation has become an industry of its own, where coaches have taken over and are preying on people who may want to believe that their thoughts alone can give them everything they desire.

Manifestation discards the fact that you are never 100% in control of external factors. The reality is that certain things are far beyond your control and you can’t manifest your way out of it.

My links:

Website: https://www.jennifercohen.com/
Instagram: @therealjencohen

Listen and follow along

Transcript

Hi, guys, it's Tony Robbins.

You're listening to Habits and Hustle Greg.

All right, welcome to another episode of Habits and Hustle Solo Edition.

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All right, so let's get into it.

Ready?

Today's topic could be maybe a little controversial because we're going to be talking and exploring a topic that I think is probably the most popular self-help trend that I've ever seen.

And that is manifestation and the ideas behind manifestation, what my belief system is around it, and all the things.

So, A, what do you believe in manifestation and manifest and just the idea of the whole trend?

I

like some aspects of manifestation and I dislike some other aspects of them.

Okay.

I think it's important to believe things and will them into existence to a certain degree.

Like you have to really have that belief system to back you up, but I don't think that it's...

Yeah, I mean, I think that, I think that there's like a lot to discuss on the topic, but I do think that to an extent, having a strong set of beliefs and that confidence and sort of that self-talk is very important.

So, this is what I believe, if I do say so myself.

I think that manifestation is a big, big umbrella lofty term.

I don't think that it means it's not being pessimistic over optimistic.

I think that people value manifestation way more than

probably they should.

This is my opinion.

By the way, this again is my opinion.

You don't have to agree with it.

You don't have to like it.

It's just what I feel and believe.

I believe this idea of,

I'll say this, what I like about it.

I like the fact that it gives, it puts the onus on the person a little bit, but not enough.

So I guess that's not what I, I guess I like and dislike that.

I think that when you only visualize something and not put it into practice by putting work into it, it's...

it means nothing.

I think that too many people are thinking that if they think about something, that it's going to happen.

So this idea of mind over matter, it is true, in my opinion, to an extent.

But I think it, what it does do is it sometimes makes the person have feeling that if something doesn't work, like if they're not taking into account psychological issues, socioeconomic issues, lots of other things.

So, just willing something to happen is not enough.

You have to put in the effort, the work, and like sometimes the struggle to get to what you to get to what you want.

And so, I actually, I'm not a fan.

I'm not a fan of how it's be, how it's overtaken everything in personal development and self-help.

And it's like the biggest thing since sliced bread.

But I think a lot of the people who talk about manifestation do acknowledge that.

Like they say you have to actually go out and do all of these things.

It's not just simply about like thinking about it.

You can't, I mean, that's just so not realistic.

But I mean, obviously there are some Woohas out there who do just literally say that.

But I think for the most part, the mass market and the people who really talk about it, like the coaches and those who, by the way, the coaching world is something that that I'm not a crazy fan of either.

But I do often see them saying, like, you know, it's a balance.

You have to manifest.

I don't see that.

I disagree.

I don't see most people talking about that.

I think a lot of people overestimate our agency in how we can control the external world.

I think we can control to a certain extent, but I don't think that we have the ability.

We're not superhuman and we're not superheroes.

I think that, you know, what actually is realistic is we can try and put positive energy somewhere and positive belief and have a mind over matter, but

not put all our eggs in that basket because I think that is actually quite harmful, right?

And I don't see a lot of experts saying, oh yeah, all you need to do is like visualize something and then also work on it.

Because then that's actually contrary to the whole overall idea of what manifestation is.

Because manifestation has been around for many, many, many, many, many, many years.

Like, I think, I don't know,

a long time.

I think the 19th century is what I read a long time ago.

The idea, I guess, behind it is that your thoughts become things, and every thought has a vibration and a frequency, right?

Right, like your thoughts become actions.

Your thoughts become real, your thoughts have a frequency, and what you put out into the world kind of reverberates back to you.

Now, I do like it in theory,

but I don't think it's enough to stand on its own.

Because I'm a big, like, you know, kind of like grinder mentality, right?

Like, if you want,

right?

If you want an, if you want an outcome, you got to put in true actual effort.

You got to like work for it.

And I think my problem with overall manifestation is that I think it allows a big amount for just this idea of allowing the universe to kind of bring to you what you envision for yourself,

whatever you deeply envision for yourself.

So I think that there's like a major disconnect between

what my overall

idea is of how to get what you want and that idea.

Yeah.

No, I understand.

I agree with that also.

I think that you have to have balance, but I just think that for the most part, the people that I, because my sister, she's really in this world with like the Brene Browns and all of them.

And she's constantly like following all these people who do these Instagram lives and stuff.

And for the most part, what I hear is definitely that you need to attract things.

Like manifestation is all about attracting stuff, right?

Well, it's the whole law of attraction.

Like this all, that's Rhonda, who's her name?

Rhonda, who wrote the book, The Law of the Laws of Attraction.

But they do, they do often discuss like the need for also actionable stuff.

Like you have to also balance it out.

You can't just, you know what I mean?

But a lot of people are so stuck in this mindset of they're full of anxiety, they're full of stress, they're full of negativity that just the act of manifesting alone gets them out of that headspace and then allows them to be able to go and do all of those things.

So I think, yeah, I mean, someone should read like a book on manifestation and then your book, and then together they would have superpowers.

Well, I find that interesting that you just said that because there's other, like, what's what's in that same world that you were just mentioning is this idea of like self-care, of like meditation, so important, self-reflection, exercising, therapy, all of these things are like kind of in the same bucket.

And I like a lot of those things, obviously.

I love a lot of those things.

I talk about it all the time.

But what I, what I, my concern and what I don't like about the idea of manifestation is putting way too much onus

on your

visions and your will versus actual work.

Yeah, just your thoughts.

Yeah, to get to what it is.

But then again, like, you know, I don't want to say that like, I know what you think becomes, like, what you do think actually does become reality, right?

Like, what you focus on becomes your truth.

So, there's elements of it.

This is the thing.

I think there's elements, the raw materials of what it's about.

Maybe I like it.

But I think over time and because of social media and all these like kooky coaches out there,

which is really a problem, which is really probably the problem.

They've like butchered what it really means at its essence and then added all these other things to become this entire subculture of self-help, which I'm not someone who definitely doesn't like very much, doesn't agree with.

Yeah, the coaching world is, I think the coaching world is actually quite dangerous.

Like, I remember you and Mark Manson talking about this in terms of the self-help world and some of the issues there.

I think that there are serious scammers out there who are constantly just prying on people's insecurities and their low points in life to be able to get a ton of money out of them.

And I think that's that's a huge problem in the coaching world.

I feel like it's, I mean, it's non-stop.

It's crazy.

It's the number one job on social media, right?

It's coaching.

That's how people are making their living.

They are like selling, they have funnels and sales funnels and they're preying, in my opinion, on people that are in a bad place in life, dark place in life, who are really struggling, who really have, don't have the wherewithal to discern from one or the other.

And not only are they taking their money, but they're giving them misguided hope.

And I know that I'm a big believer that if you don't have hope, you don't have anything.

But misguided hope is really, really dangerous, in my opinion.

So, like, I'm all about giving people, as you can imagine, this is what my whole podcast is about, is giving people tactile, practical things that they can do to even make their life 1% better, 10% better, that they can actually take the ownership of themselves and create that.

Now, if manifestation comes comes with, you know, not only are you supposed to visualize it, but then you also have actually like a plan to get from A to B to C to D, great.

But if it's just like willing it and putting all the agency on yourself as you have all the control what happens on the outside, because the other train of thought and what is like people are talking from both sides of their mouth is that you don't have control of what goes on out there and all you can control is yourself.

So if all that what you control is yourself, how do you then have control of all this external forces that you are supposed to be manifesting to like work in your favor?

So when it doesn't work in your favor, when it doesn't happen and doesn't work in your favor, then you go down a really dark rabbit hole.

Because the part, like I said, is that people don't take into account all sorts of other ancillary things that are happening, like the socioeconomic, like any kind of like psychological thing or sickness or health issues.

I mean, I just think it's a topic that needs to be really dissected.

I mean, this is not maybe the best, only time we're going to talk about it.

It's just opening up this conversation a little bit to really to a conversation that's beyond just, yeah, like it's a vibration and mind over matter.

And if you, you know,

achieve it or believe it and it will happen or whatever, you know, all these, all these like nice cliches, you know?

I feel like something that would be important is because some people do like life coaches, like they really would like to have them, and some of them are really great.

Some are great for sure.

I think what would be a really good tangible thing is like helping people understand how to discern between the good ones and the bad ones.

Because there are so many of these people out there that are spewing BS, but then there are also like real treasures out there that can actually help you.

And it's also individual.

One person might work great for one person and not for another.

And so I think that would be a really good actionable item to be able able to help people see like, okay, well, that's something I should be weary of.

You know, someone who's always trying to upsell you on something is somebody that you should be cautious of.

They're consistently trying to upsell you on various products or digital products or this, that, and the other that they have, that's definitely of concern in my eyes.

You know, anybody who's consistently trying to get you to come to like 10 different retreats and wants you to pay for the bonus and the gold and the VIP and the silver.

It's like, I'm very weary of that sort of a scheme.

I find this to be really, I just think that that's like a slippery road to go down with a lot of those people.

And that's something that I always look out for as well.

And I also think their social media presence is a really big factor too.

Like I really like to see what someone's social presence looks like, if it aligns with me, if it does not, if I think it's full of a bunch of BS, if it just looks like really generic content.

There's just a lot of good red flags that you can take account for.

And there's also some green flags that you can look for within a life code.

This is what I think too.

I agree with you.

Definitely.

I agree with that.

But I think also I find it curious when the people, okay, the first step is discernment.

Look at who you're following.

Again, we talk with this so often, watching who's telling you about manifestation.

Key right there, right there.

And the content that they have is actually quite important because if they are being super flashy and braggadocious about all the material things they have.

I think to me, that's a red flag.

That's a good red flag.

That's a huge red flag.

I see a lot of people on social media who are talking so much about laws of attraction and manifestation, like talking from their private plane, which they probably don't own, and wearing, you know, balmain and, or is that how you say, balmain?

I don't know, but I've actually always wondered.

I think it's balmain.

Wearing Valentino, balmain, wearing really expensive clothes, and who are basically trying to sell you a life of material riches.

To me, such a turnoff and a major red flag.

Okay, so to me, if you're seeing these things, probably you shouldn't be taking their advice.

They're offering you like crypto finance advice, definitely run.

They're offering you crypto finance.

Exactly.

Our NFT stuff, run for the hills.

But, you know, again, this is really about just opening up a conversation that's beyond just taking things at face value.

I'm a big, I really am about, and I really, I try to shed any type of light and, you know, pose a question that maybe, you know, you might be thinking but not sure of.

Maybe it can be some, you can, you can glean some insight from the two, from the two, you know, Yahoos on this podcast to think about something differently.

But I really believe that manifestation has really taken over in terms of personal development and self-help And just really think about what that entails.

And if you are somebody who is a big believer in it and it's something that's really helped you, I'd love to hear your story.

I'd love to hear how it has.

Please share in the comments, let me know, and we can revisit the conversation.

Yeah, definitely.

And drop it in the Facebook group while you're at it.

Tell us your story.

Exactly.

And nothing ever, I want to say this, I want to end with this.

Nothing ever replaces good old-fashioned hard work, period.

Thank you so much for listening to this week's solo episode.

And if you like this, I know you will like, hopefully love my book, Bigger, Better, Bolder.

And why?

It's because it's time for you to start living the life you want and not just the life you get.

I not only help you answer the questions like, what do you want most in life and why don't you have it, but I also help you make it a reality.

The link is in the show notes for you to easily check it out now.

And thank you again for being here and spending time with me.

Now go show up to your life and live a bit bolder today.