Episode 567: Swords, Motorcycles, and Cannons

Like a midnight and the rock and roller He's in a fight for wrestling solar Using a racket and some mind controller He's Jim Cornette

The keys to the future held by the past And with Tag T partner Barion Last He sends this message out by podcast He's Jim Cornet

Well he's never fake a phony

He never backs down from a fight.

He never wins the pony.

Cause his mama raised him right.

It's time

to prepare

your mind.

Get the experience.

Get the experience.

Get the experience of Jim Cornet.

Hello again, everybody, and welcome to another exciting episode of the Jim Coronet Experience.

Tony Storm's amnesia is cured on a show I'd like to forget, plus a memorable evisceration by the Samoan werewolf himself on Saturday night's main event.

All that and more, and joining me, Hawaiian Brian, the podcasting lion, the king of the Arcadian Vanguard Podcast Network, Mr.

Co-host to you.

I can't remember the last time he forgot something.

The great Brian Last, everybody.

Aloha, Jim.

I have arrived.

I am here.

It's a pleasure to be back here once again.

Let's have fun today.

I think you need to get Vic Mizzy to punch that theme up for you.

Maybe put in a couple of slide whistles and a fucking cowbell.

I think I could do all of that, but again, I'm doing it live.

I'm doing it.

On the go with one hand crooked to the side because I'm facing the microphone.

It's a mess.

I'm probably doing damage to my shoulder, but it's all for the people.

You're suffering for your art.

How do you know Vic Mizzy couldn't do that live?

Google Vic Mizzy, kids.

How do you know he couldn't do that stuff live?

Do you ever see him?

Huh?

Huh?

Huh?

Well, it takes a lot of practice to do what I do.

I don't just think anyone could pick it up and do it.

Well,

you're comparing yourself to the incomparable musical genius of Vic Mizzy.

That's right.

Well,

I've some people think I play like Vic Morrow.

Don't Google that, kids.

It's too soon.

Too soon.

It's too soon.

All right, headless horseman.

Geez, that was worse than anything I said.

Well, I had to top it.

You know, the snow is melting.

Do you know a statistic, Brian, that I know that I bet you don't know that I know and you don't know?

I don't know what that statistic is, no.

There has been more snow this past month

in, and maybe this past winter,

the one that we're in,

in Pensacola, Florida than there has been in New York City.

Think about that now.

You know what they said on the news last night?

I don't remember when the last time it would have happened or if it was the first time, but just the fact itself jumped out at me and I looked up.

Every state, all 50 states had snow on the ground.

Yes.

Even Hawaii.

Oh, well, because of the mountains and the volcanoes out there.

Yes.

And

Bourbon Street got nine inches.

And that's not the first time somebody's got nine inches on Bourbon Street, but still, it's

unprecedented, it'd be snow.

But no, more snow in fact.

Well, maybe, yeah, you're correct there, Bourbon Street.

But more snow in Pensacola than in New York.

And

just like the territory days.

And we have already had

two inches more in the past, just the

snow we had a couple of weeks ago.

We've had two inches more than our normal winter average combined altogether.

So, and I've still, it's been 40-something degrees.

It's 50 to be 50 degrees.

Today, and I've still half of the yard is covered with snow.

It's not white ice now.

It's not not even snow.

You could just walk on it if you don't slip and bust your ass.

That was going to be my question.

How much of your yard is still covered with it?

Because we still have snow everywhere from like a week ago.

Yeah, no, ours is three weeks today.

Thank you.

Three weeks with it.

It's taken for this shit to melt.

It hasn't fallen in fucking two and a half weeks.

Anyway, if it don't snow, we can't go.

That was the motto there.

But we got a wonderful show today.

A wonderful, wonderful show.

Wonderful, wonderful.

And you know who's wonderful?

Justin.

And I'm not going to give his last name.

It begins with a J.

He's not a public figure, so you don't need to try to guess.

But he just wrote us both, Brian, I believe you saw it, a wonderful email.

The show helped him through some tough personal times he had and somebody in the family passing away, but now he is a proud family man and is with his wife and sons.

And he thanked us, but we thank you, Justin, because it was a wonderful, wonderful email.

Some people in this world are still polite, Brian.

That's right.

Thank you, Justin.

And the show will get better as the year goes on.

Well, see, now you got to end it on kind of like a fucking...

I had an up, upbeat message going there, and then you're kind of like apologizing for upbeat Justin Jay.

I know all about it.

All right, I got an email here also.

Hold on here.

This is from Wiley.

And guess what Wiley sent me

as a gift in the mail?

Slides with bugs in them or something?

No, many times when we are arguing about phraseology, terminology, and linguistics, I refer to my

American Heritage Dictionary third edition.

Oh, always, yeah.

To determine.

And I haven't actually looked until now, but I'm, because this actually was Mama Cornett's, because she was a crossword puzzle aficionado.

Yes, copyright 1994.

So it's

fairly recent.

I mean, most of the words that we need have been invented before 1994, but

Wiley sent me the American Heritage Dictionary fifth edition.

A big hardback.

It weighs like 30 fucking pounds.

Got color pictures and everything.

I looked up shit in it, and there was a picture of Vince Russo.

What year?

2011.

Oh, there you go.

So now I'm going to be able to look up.

Of course, it's hard to heft up here on my lap, as big and heavy a tome as it is, but I'm going to now be able to look up 20 more years of words to prove to you that I'm right and you are indeed mistaken and incorrect.

Does it have Kfabe?

It does not.

K-Fabe is not,

at least as of the fifth edition in 2011, but I think it's on one of these online pretenders to the, but

unless you're Merriam-Webster, and she was a lovely old lady, or American Heritage, you don't get to be a dictionary in my book.

But see what I did there?

You don't get to be a dictionary in my book.

You know, you bring up Merriam-Webster, a lovely lady.

I'm sure she was.

What would have happened if like the biggest whore in town came up with the greatest encyclopedia or dictionary would people have embraced it or would the whoredom have scared them off

so you're you're saying if if

nipples cocksucker just the biggest dirt bag or slut bag or just a bag of from your town and no one wants anything to do with them yet they write this amazing right they compile this amazing history of either words or like i said an encyclopedia well it doesn't have to just be that but you you know you've heard the fucking stories about Betty Crocker, haven't you?

I'll tell you what,

I wouldn't eat any of her vanilla pudding.

I'll just tell you that.

What book was this in?

Maybe I have to read this one.

Well, no, you got to know people to get the inside stories on some of these things.

But boy, I'll tell you what,

Betty Crocker been in more laps than a napkin.

I'll have you know.

But I'm back to Wiley here.

See, you're trying to take me off kilter on the program because he asks a question.

He has a communication here.

I thought we were done with this guy.

No, he sent the book.

I was telling you about

the book, the book,

the book, but he has communication.

And he says, Hello, Jim.

Meaningfully, absent is your name.

My parents were good friends with Don and Libby Gossett,

Eddie Graham's brother and sister-in-law, starting in the mid-1970s, on the CB radio here in Tampa.

And

I don't even know if the children know what the fuck that was, but the CB radio in the 70s with the gasoline shortage and the crackdown on speed limit, and a truck driver started the thing, and then all the wrestlers got on it.

It's the citizens band

radio that you could have in your car, and you

allegedly could tell all the other drivers where the fucking cops were that were given the speeding tickets.

Break a record 19.

I'm going to take control of the Atlanta office.

Yeah, well, there you go.

And then all the wrestlers got on it and had fucking communications in various ways.

But nevertheless,

Wiley goes on.

See, you keep trying to get away from Wiley.

Wiley goes on to say, Libby shared a story that Eddie had a deal with the bank right around the corner from the office that masked wrestlers could wear their masks to cash their checks in the drive-through.

This was because the fans would sometimes follow the wrestlers from the Tampa Sportatorium to said bank.

A few years ago, I was able to confirm this story with Jody Hamilton when he worked here as the assassin.

Do you know of any other offices that had similar deals with their local banks to keep fans from seeing who they were?

That's worded unwieldily, but you get the point.

Yeah.

Good question.

Good question.

Well, and that's the thing.

Everything that can ever have happened has happened in in the wrestling business, and every arrangement that could ever be made has been made.

So we can't just make blanket statements, but I can give a few for instances.

Are you into for instances, Brian?

Sure.

Well,

this is a true story.

I have no reason to doubt it.

And

if you think, well,

somebody out there is going, well, why do they have to fucking cash their check in their mask?

Because, you know, if nobody knows who the fuck they are,

especially back in the old days, well, in the old, old days, a lot of times guys got paid in cash to begin with.

But then, as the territories formed and there was some element of responsibility to report something to the government, territories gave out checks, but

a lot of the guys still might not have checking accounts, as ridiculous as this sounds, because some guys weren't great with money management.

But also, let's say, you know, fuck

there was such an element of distrust if a guy came into a territory and worked a weekend or a week or two weeks or whatever and got his fucking check before he goes halfway across the country to where he's actually working regularly and puts it in his checking account.

And it takes in those days, what was it, five business days to go back to the

this son of a bitch promoter might cancel the fucking check on me, right?

So they would want to get it as quick as possible.

And there's all

reasonings such as this.

Austin Idol.

You had reasonings such as that.

And

so with, I've mentioned the story before.

It's been a while for the kids out there.

Just a quick recap.

In Memphis, where I primarily worked before I went to Mid-South, every Monday night at the Mid-South Coliseum, you got your check for the previous week.

It was a handwritten check on Jarrett Wrestling Enterprises account signed by Bob Wright, who was

Teeny's brother, I believe, or brother.

Well, yeah, close enough.

He was in the family.

He was the bookkeeper.

And there was a little yellow piece of note paper,

paperclip to it.

Is it Memphis?

$150.

Louisville, $100, whatever the fuck you got.

And that was handwritten, too.

And I would just take and put the check in my bank account.

Well, when I went to Mid-South, I've had they gave the checks out.

And remember, Watts held back two weeks, you know, just in case you left any unpaid bills, wink-wink.

But you would get your check on interviews on Wednesday during the day at Channel 3 in Shreveport.

And that was another incentive for all the top guys to show up.

for interviews.

And if it was the underneath guys, I think Grizzly took their checks, you know, that night or whatever to the town, blah, blah, blah.

But immediately, the guys, because I was new first day, you know, at interviews, they said, Oh, we'll take you, you follow us right after we get out of here because we were going to do TV that night, I believe,

and we'll show you the bank where you go and cash your check.

And I was like, okay, well, it they said it almost like it was a given thing that I was obligated.

This is how they do it here, right?

Okay,

So

I went with them and, you know, ever there was the line of wrestlers waiting to cash their check at this bank that in Shreveport.

That's what they, all the boys went in there on the Wednesday afternoons.

So I cashed my check and it was only $1,000.

I just got there, right?

We were doing $1,000 or $1,200 for the week, as we've talked about.

But these guys on top, some of them had a couple thousand dollars, and they're sticking.

And so afterwards, I asked,

maybe was it Darso, Krushchev Khrushchev?

I said,

why do we have to cash the checks here?

And he said, oh, we don't have to.

We just do because they got to deal with

Watts' office that they know all of us.

Well, why don't we just put it in our individual account?

A lot of these guys either didn't have checking accounts or just wanted to carry the fucking cash around.

Because that was the era when they had the big gold bracelets and the rings and the

gold coins on the chains around the neck and the

fanny packs and the bank bags.

And they'd stick the fucking $2,000 in their bank bag with all this jewelry and then go out to some bar and get drunk and lose it.

So I started after that taking my check back to the check account.

But anyway, here's the point I was going to make.

Brian, at that time, who was the most famous mass wrestler, maybe in the country at that point, that was also in Mid-South Wrestling in 1984?

Mr.

Wrestling, too.

You know what he did?

He didn't go to the boys bank.

He didn't even fucking stay at the same hotels that the boys did.

And,

you know, people may have the average person had no idea that Mr.

Wrestling 2 was Johnny Walker.

But even if they knew that Johnny Walker, they recognized him from pictures where he wrestled as himself 10 years previously or whatever.

Nobody had the wrestling fans hadn't seen Johnny Walker in a ring in 10 years, hadn't seen his face.

So he said, Yeah, I'm retired.

He purposely didn't, because if he walked in with all of the guys, there's Hercules Hernandez and Nikolai Volkov and this guy and that.

Well, this guy must be a wrestler who

looks like that.

He's that tall and he's wide.

Ah, that's Mr.

Wrestling too.

He rode in the car by himself.

Remember, I said he had that little car and we'd pass.

The only way I ever saw him, when I was working a program with him was that we passed him driving by himself in his little car one day.

And Dennis from Georgia knew what he looked like.

And

there's two.

But he would put the mask on four or five miles from the building, whatever.

And he didn't,

at that point in his life, maybe years earlier, he had been around the boys more or rode with particular people.

But at that point, he was almost retired anyway and grumpy.

But he wasn't around anybody, so you wouldn't suspect he was a wrestler.

And he had his own bank account in a bank that the other boys didn't go to and lived in an apartment complex away from everybody.

And that's the way a lot of the masked guys did.

They could separate themselves

from

being wrestlers or being celebrities or being known by just not hanging around with the other guys and calling attention to themselves because people didn't know what they looked like.

And nobody in mid-South Rhett, none of the fans had a picture of Johnny Walker without a mask on anywhere.

With any,

nobody ever saw him.

You know who would have been a good mass wrestler?

Whitey Bulger.

He kept his own fucking gimmick, right?

He stayed.

He burrowed in and stayed away from everybody and attracted no attention for, what was it, 20 years or whatever?

Well, I once saw a thing, it wasn't a TED talk, I don't think it was some kind of just spoken word thing.

The guy was great telling the story about how he had these really nice neighbors, these old, you know, retirees who were very sweet and had gifts at times, and they really liked him.

And then one day he's coming home in the FBI, like, that's Whitey Bolger.

We need you to help us get him out.

Yeah.

But yeah, and Bill Eady, the mass superstar,

he was very protective of his face.

And that way he could, even though he was a big guy, because

Bill looks like a distinguished gentleman, you know, especially in his youthful prime.

You would think, well, that's some big former football coach or something.

But, you know,

that's the point is.

He was able to stay away also from the, you know, the spotlight when he

was out personally with his family or whatever because people didn't know what he fucking looked like

but that uh

and as a matter of fact with two remember jimmy carter just passed away

everybody's seen the picture everybody knows the story that miss lillian loved wrestling and two was her favorite and

he got invited to

You know,

Georgia, the governor's mansion, right, is where he met Miss Lillian and they had those pictures pictures taken.

It wasn't a White House.

No, he didn't go to the White House.

No, because that's the thing is he was invited to the inauguration.

They worked with him on the mask at the governor's mansion in Georgia, and he sat there and not only took the publicity pictures and everything else,

but had a meeting with Miss Lillian, the President's mother, one-on-one, never took the mask off.

And she was polite enough, apparently, and respectful enough to not ask him who he was.

But they, you know, they had a nice talk.

But when he got an invitation to the inauguration,

they wouldn't work with him on the fucking mask.

He would have had to take the mask off and he had to turn it down.

He couldn't go to the presidential inauguration because then he'd have to take his mask off.

And he was one of the hottest baby faces in Georgia.

It would have killed a gimmick.

Although, at this point, I wonder how much of that story is bullshit, considering what we know now about his past no the last thing he wanted was a background check well but they don't background check everybody sitting in the

background check you know

do they well well i i don't know

the guy that lives in the white house now couldn't pass a background check

but but point being i know it's not bullshit because who was sitting at the inauguration

jim barnett remember barnett went to the fucking inauguration, and he was like two rows ahead of some fucking famous people.

Was he on something?

Like the President's Council for the Arts or something?

Yeah, I was thinking wrong.

He was definitely on the Georgia Council for the Arts.

Okay, maybe that's what I'm thinking of.

Maybe that's what I'm saying.

But he got a presidential citation of some description also.

But Barnett was in like the second row at fucking Carter's inauguration.

You know, we didn't really talk about Jimmy Carter's passing.

I was just curious what you thought of.

like, your name is Jim.

Some people call you Jimmy.

I hate to hate to hear of anybody with my name dying.

No, but when all of a sudden Jimmy...

It was all broke up over Hoffa.

When all of a sudden there's a Jimmy in the White House, was that a big deal to you to have another Jimmy, a fellow Jimmy out there, Jimmying around?

No,

I more enjoyed that he was, that he had a nice smile after the previous jowl-faced criminal that we just gotten rid of, Nixon.

That was just because I was.

Don't forget Ford was in the middle.

Well, he was, at least he was fodder for Saturday Night Live.

But no, Nixon dominated the television literally with the Watergate hearings and everything.

You couldn't fucking turn on a television anytime during the day for like six months,

as well as the news and everything else of all the Nixon drama.

And I'm just, I'm 12 years old or 10 years old or whatever the fuck I was.

Just get the fuck off the fucking screen.

And then here comes Jimmy and he's got a nice smile and he's got a goofy brother and he's from a small town in Georgia.

Good.

Everybody just fucking relax.

Hey, you brought up making fun of Ford on Saturday Night Live.

I just saw this movie.

I don't know if you've heard about it.

It's Ivan Reitman's son made a movie about his version of the first night of Saturday Night Live in 1975.

Oh,

I've seen a glimpse or a glimmer of some type of advertising just enough to get interested.

I ended up watching it because it was finally available.

I could stream it.

And I read a story where

I think it's Jason Reitman said that he had a showing of the film.

And after it, Chevy Chase came over to him.

And, you know, he's dying to know what Chevy thinks.

Chevy's in the film, not him personally, but an actor playing him.

Yes.

And Chevy just said, you should be embarrassed.

Oh, god damn.

And what he said was, well, now I got my Chevy Chase story.

Now I got my Chevy Chase moment.

So I decided to watch this movie.

And I have to say, Chevy Chase is fucking right.

Oh, my God.

This movie is such a distortion of facts and things that happen.

I get you want to jam everything into one movie, but it was really not well done.

And some of the actors were not the right people for the role.

Some were.

The Lauren Michaels was really good.

But the Jim Henson was atrocious.

The Chevy was bad.

So this is just not Chevy's noted grumpiness and misery in his middle and old age.

He's actually got a point here.

Yeah, I mean, the portrayal of Michael O'Donoghue was pretty awful.

It seemed like he read every Saturday Night Live book that everyone else read, and he tried to jam every story about the behind the scenes for the first season into one episode, into one movie.

So, like, you want to like it, and you want to get into it.

They got,

what's his name from Oz?

Schillinger.

He plays Milton Burrell.

Schillinger?

Yeah, he plays Milton Burrell, who, you know, famously on the debut of Saturday Night Live showed up to hit on Chevy Chase's girlfriend.

That never happened.

So there's a whole bunch of just bizarre shit.

I wanted to like this movie.

I'm such a mark for like movies that take place in Rockefeller Center while live shows are happening, but this sucked.

I hated it.

I shouldn't say I hated it.

I wanted to like it, and I thought at times it looked all right.

And then

just, I don't know.

Just like what Ivan Reitman did did the private parts which could have been an amazing movie and ended up just being all right this was a disappointment so you're giving it one or two snaps down

uh two snaps down two snaps down

well i'm glad we got that uh established that nobody needs to waste their time and go out of their way to see this horrible apparently

abomination of a motion picture i want more people to see it so i can find out if anyone else agrees with me because I also read good reviews like, oh, he did a wonderful job and he found the little funny moments.

And again, the guy who played Lauren Michaels is great.

But so now you're telling people to go watch a movie you thought was shitty just to give them

their opinion.

That's like, have you ever had somebody they'll be sitting next to you?

They'll take a bite of something, they'll look at it, and they'll fucking scrunch their nose up and they'll say,

that's spoiled.

Here, taste this.

Well, if it's fucking rotten, why do I want any of it?

Yeah, I do that.

This milk smells bad.

Smell this.

Yeah.

Well, no, actually take a sip and see what happens.

I don't know about that.

See, that's the thing.

So you need to direct the people, Brian.

You need to direct the people to a movie that they're going to want to see, a movie that they're going to be gratified, that they, and entertained and enlightened, and brought to a higher plane of consciousness.

That kind of movie where it'll uplift them and inspire them and take them on an action-packed thrill ride, according to upcoming reviews that have yet to be written.

That's right.

You need to send them to the movie that I'm in, The Queen of the Ring.

That's the movie they need to be seeing.

It's going to come out in March and maybe even earlier.

We're going to have news on that in the next week or so.

Everyone's talking about it.

Jim Cornette is queen of the ring now in your life.

No, come on now.

No.

Don't try to make believe that I'm the star of this thing.

I've admitted that I'm just an ancillary character.

I'm just playing a part in the in the in the overall cog of the wheel is what I am, as they say in the in the show business.

See, no one's caught on yet.

It's kind of like the old Eddie Murphy and Arsinio thing.

You play two roles.

He plays Jim Cornette the Commissioner.

He also plays Elvira Snodgrass.

Well, but I was the only one that would fit the tights.

But no, but the queen of the ring is going to the life and story, the life and story.

The life and times or the story of Mildred Burke, the first obviously nationally recognized mainstream women's world wrestling champion, is going to be coming to a theater near you very soon.

We've talked about it on the last couple of programs that we've done.

And we're going to have some interviews

upcoming with some of the people involved in the movie on the shows here.

And we're going to have some clips.

Hopefully we get that all worked out, the logistics of that on the YouTube chat.

So just keep listening to the podcast and watching the YouTube channel, and you're going to hear more about this.

But I thought about this the other day, Brian.

After we had talked about it, this movie, besides the fact that I got to be in a movie and only had to go less than 15 miles from my house, and it was shot in my hometown, and it's about

the career or the line of work or whatever you might want to call it that I've been in for almost 50 years.

But

this movie could have been responsible for my last big crowd pop.

Did I tell you about this?

I don't know about this.

Because

most of the time, you know, like when we're, when we shot the scenes, there's a still of me sitting with some of the other promoters and

Emily Bett Ricard, who's playing Mildred Burke.

And

I hope that's the way she pronounces it.

I'm thinking of Steve Ricard.

But

we're in a room.

You know, some of the stuff was shot.

There was no audience around.

It was the crew, and you're doing that type of thing.

But when they did the wrestling scene that I am pictured with Martin Cove and my old buddy Dean Hill in the

stands there,

they obviously, there was 300 people or whatever in the room.

It was a theater in the round down at Actors Theater.

And they, you know, obviously they needed people to fill all the seats to make it look like a big crowd for the wrestling scenes.

So many of those folks were extras

from

Louisville, right?

Hey, come dressed in period attire and you can be a part of this movie shoot.

And bless those people because,

God damn it, as I said one night, we were there till three in the morning.

And, but anyway.

So

I don't want to sound, again, I'm a very humble bit player in this wonderful production.

I don't want to sound like I got to Big Head, but Brian, think about this.

Here's a bunch of actors and, you know, technical people and professional movie people,

but they're in the middle of 250 people from Louisville.

And I've been on television in one form or another in Louisville for the past 40 years almost.

So they kind of knew who the fuck I was more than anybody else.

Can I say that without sounding like a dick?

No, I mean, you're a dick.

I mean, there's nothing wrong with that, though.

Embrace it.

You're a star now.

Now you're a star.

No, I'm just saying in this particular, because

they've come to be extras in a wrestling-oriented movie.

So they kind of, you know, many of them were of the wrestling fan description.

And so anyway.

Without giving anything away at the end of the climactic scene of this whole thing or whatever, The point is, while they're shooting this match, I, as a representative of the Athletic Commission, have to get up and make a pronouncement.

And in the pronouncement that I make, I mention both Mildred Burke and June Byers' names.

And there's two Bs there, right?

And

we've done it five or six times.

I mentioned...

last week that they would shoot the same thing.

Obviously, it's a movie from numerous angles and redo certain things.

So you have to do things over and over.

I've done it five or six times, boom, you know, no big deal.

It's a fucking sentence.

But then they're doing it again.

And right when I started,

I got to the point of no return.

And I realized in my mind a millisecond before I did it that I was going to transpose

the names I was supposed to mention, and they had to be in a certain order.

And so I just stopped right dead and paused for two seconds and said, shit.

And the whole goddamn place blew

because they'd been fucking sitting there for four hours or whatever, watching the same thing, and they were very respectful, but it was time for a little levity.

And here up gets Cornette, the goddamn

OVW announcer that never makes a mistake.

And I stand up and flummocks in the middle of everything.

So it was, was I and the ovation was long enough that I was able to milk it slightly and then take a small bow and sit down and put my head in my hands.

So that I'm not doing the live appearances anymore.

So that could be my last big crowd pop for fucking up and saying shit.

And I go let everyone know we've been talking to Ash and Josh over there and we're trying to get these outtakes, these bloopers, all the questions.

Hey, no, no.

Reels and reels of bloopers from what we understand.

They didn't print those, ladies and gentlemen.

I tell you, boy,

I'd love to tell a story, but I don't want to embarrass the fella.

If he either may be in the movie or he may be listening or whatever.

But there was another gentleman on the production that possibly was not.

was not as accomplished with the material as they had hoped he might be.

I don't know if he's going to make the cut or not, but I was sitting back watching him one day and

Ash was giving me the eye like, could you help him in any way?

I said, just

have him stand there and I'll get behind him, have him move his lips, and I'll say the shit.

You could have gotten Harley Cameron involved.

You know, that's the thing.

I didn't even think about a ventriloquist at that point.

But nevertheless, that's the issue.

We have to put ventriloquism back into people's minds.

That's the barrier.

But no, nevertheless, everyone's looking forward to this movie and, of course, seeing you in it.

And they are finalizing details, I understand, when we we can talk about where and when the world premiere is, and then when the rest of the folks around the various states of the union can see it.

That's right.

And once we know when and where, Jim will list every single movie theater that you could see this film.

Yeah, that'll be up on the website at blowme.com.

No, we'll, we'll give, I'm sure they're going to have a website.

We'll ask Josh about that.

Because we're not going to do all the website work, and I'm not going to list.

They're going to be on a thousand screens.

How long would it take me to talk about a thousand or just mention a thousand theaters?

That's like one of those DraftKings.

What are they called?

Disclaimers,

as they are known.

Have you heard of these before?

Yes, I do.

These disclaimers, as they are known.

These, these DNAs or these NDAs, DNA.

The NDAs.

Can we move along now?

Sure, sure.

Moving along.

Yeah.

You know where else we can move to?

JimCornet.com because, heck, we're almost there right now.

By the time the folks hear this, the February Cornettes Collectibles sale at jimcornet.com will be ongoing.

It starts Saturday, February 1st at noon Eastern.

If you are currently in a time and space continuum where you are after that point, you can just hop on there right now.

And all

of the

Midnight Express or Heavenly Bodies tag team sets, action figure sets, are on sale for $20 off, including the four-pack of the Midnight Express with the collector's booklet and certificate and autograph pic.

They all come with the autograph pictures.

And

if you buy any of the tag team sets, then you can get any of the remaining Jim Cornette action figures while they last for half price $24.95.

And those are autographed too.

And I will tip you off that

the commentator play sets ain't going to last long.

They say goodbye.

There's 20 something left.

And the next to go will be the pink and black breast cancer.

So just if you're wanting to get one of these things before it's too late.

And

anybody, see, I'm...

Stacking my papers now, Brian, with enthusiasm and vehemence because anybody that spends $50 or more on merchandise gets a free two-hour DVD of classic 70s and 80s wrestling from the Wrestling Gold series, and you can't beat that with a stick.

It's like a sore penis.

You just can't beat it.

JimCornet.com, all the month of February, because it is a month of love, and we're trying to spray our love all over.

Spray your love all over.

Was that,

who was that?

Destiny's Child?

I didn't know you were familiar with the Destiny's Child catalog of songs.

Yes, spray your love all over.

I don't know.

Anyway, you are again responsible for something, Brian, that I did.

That I'll

never get that time in my life back again, especially now that I'm in the winter years and the days are growing shorter.

I got to be judicious with the way I spend my time, Brian.

And you,

and you, because of the, and actually I blame some of the cult members, the cult of Cornette, the people out there have punished me for some reason because there was so much feedback.

Oh, you got to see it.

You got to watch it.

You got to see it.

Collision

from the AEW folks on January 25th against Saturday night's main event.

It'll be interesting whenever we get those numbers.

I don't know if you'll

be able if you have you, have you Googled those already?

We will talk about them later.

We have the numbers.

For the record, I did not ask you to watch Collision.

No, you said everybody said, you got to see this, Maria May

and Tony Storm.

You got to see what are you going to say about this?

What do you think about this?

They were in an uproar.

There was some outpouring of demand, popular demand.

Would you not agree with that?

For that specific segment, absolutely.

Okay, well, I had to fucking find it.

So I went through through a few of the other things

because I kind of, again, it's not like I wanted to, but I couldn't not stop and say, what the fuck is happening here in a couple places?

But we'll get to Maria in a second, but they were against Saturday night's main event.

Samoa Joe is back in this talent-starved company, and he wrestled Nick Wayne on collision

that

nobody watches to begin with and not against

NBC and the cock, right?

So what

they bring Samoa Joe back and then they hide him on Saturdays.

He needs to be immediately insane.

And wrestling Nick Wayne.

Even if it's part of the overall thing with Christian, he needs to, he's a guy that could step in and save something for this

foundering ship.

Is it foundering or floundering?

Floundering.

No, it's not.

I

hold on.

So, why'd you ask me?

Well, because I thought you'd give me an answer I agreed with.

I am going to, it's founder.

I bet you it is.

I'm looking it up now.

You just want to look in your dictionary.

I'm looking it up now in the fifth edition.

Fat a foot loose.

That's right.

Oh, son of a guy.

Hold on, founder.

Audio here, ladies and gentlemen.

Foundation, founder.

Founder, to sink or cause to sink below the water, to fail utterly, collapse, to go lame as a horse.

Now, flounder.

Yeah, what's flounder then?

Founder use in usage.

Founder means to fail utterly and collapse.

Flounder means to proceed in confusion.

If John is foundering in a course, he had better drop it.

If he is floundering, he may yet pull through.

So, can they be both foundering and floundering?

Because they are certainly in confusion and they certainly resemble a dead horse at times.

There you go.

Foundering, floundering, foundering, floundering.

So they were outdoors at Daly's place.

Did you notice that?

Or did you, were you so engrossed by the

thesbianism that was being displayed on a screen that you forgot they were in 40-degree weather in North Florida outdoors in what looked like a fucking game show set with a studio audience wearing winter coats and mittens.

It looked like, it looked, I swear to God,

what was the name of that place?

The Rostraver Ice Rink in Bell Vernon, Pennsylvania, when I just flipped out and cut a promo on everybody because it was 45 degrees in the fucking building.

For the Ring of Honor TV taping, they couldn't turn the fucking heat on or they'd melt the ice.

Anyway, then did you, you didn't see Okada versus Commander?

And Commander, by the way, is the prestigious Ring of Honor World Television Champion.

I did not.

You didn't see this.

I did not.

And Okada's the Continental Adrift.

Yes.

I believe.

Yes.

Well,

I'll just let you know the finish because this was a

thrilling, actually slow motion because Okada wasn't going to take by a cold ring.

Taking bumps on any, even a good ring in 45 degree weather will jar your goddamn kidneys.

So after about 10 minutes, Commander, who's the babyface,

he did a springboard moonsault off the top rope to the floor onto Okada and you boom and landed on him, right?

You visualize that?

You got that in your head?

Sure.

And I've seen Commander fly around.

Sure.

He way up there and bam and landed on him.

And then he picked Okada up and rolled him in the ring like a sack of shit

and jumped up to the top rope and came off the top.

And when he did, Okada just stood up and caught him coming off the top with a waistlock and hit his little clothesline.

One, two, three.

I was like, what the fuck?

So, what good was the moonsault?

This fucking guy jumped up 15 feet in the air and landed on this son of a bitch with his big moonsault, and it rolls him in the ring.

And then immediately, the guy just stands up and catches him and beats him.

And

then

okada offered commander the baby face his hand to shake his hand and commander shook it and then okada leveled him and piggled him three or four more times where he got up off him and walked off

like i said i didn't watch it doesn't sound like i missed much and uh yes doesn't sound like i missed much you missed the boom guys they They boomed with Adam Cole.

Oh, God.

And then they had a six-man tag with Adam Cole and Kyle O'Reilly and Roderick Strong against Danny Garcia and Cool Hand Luke and Mac Daddy Daddy Mac.

So, yeah, you're correct.

A babyface six-man tag.

And

Cole and his guys won.

And then they all shook hands.

So it was thrilling.

Then Tony finally Schiavone, Tony finally, Schiavone, finally, I should say,

finally, Tony Schiavone was in the ring and introduced Maria May.

Mariah.

Well, that's what they call the wind.

But actually, you know, they call Maria the snow because she was pure as the driven snow, but then she drifted.

And in Maria's opening line, when she gets in the ring with Tony, was okay, Tony, let's get this shit over with.

That's the AEW company motto, actually, from what I understand.

Well,

she's been called out there so that she can talk to Tony Storm face to face.

All right, Tony, let's get this shit over with.

That's what everyone says there.

And well, as a matter of fact, then Tony Schiavone

introduces Tony Storm so she can come out in this fiasco of a company owned by Tony Khan.

Tony, Tony, Tony.

That was an underrated group, wasn't it?

It feels good.

I didn't ask you to.

That was the name of the song.

Oh, okay.

By Tony Tony Tony.

Anyway, so

now we should mention at this point

that let me try to get this straight without going into boring detail.

Over the

Tony Storm was gone for a few months, and then several weeks ago, she showed back up, but she wasn't timeless Tony Storm in black and white.

She wasn't

doing the, you know, overly dramatic movie star homage, whatever the fuck.

She was

bright-eyed and bushy-tailed like rookie Tony Storm.

She didn't remember ever being in AEW.

She didn't remember ever meeting any of these people that she'd either been friends with or had been fighting.

She was just thrilled to be here and going to prove herself, right?

Complete amnesia.

Just forgotten what the fuck had gone on for a couple of years.

That's basically what was going on, right?

Well, that's what she, again, I think I kind of said where it ended up going.

That's what

she was leading people to believe.

Well, but that's the way that she was presenting it.

And that's, and Nigel, even here, this is all going to go into, this is my presentation now.

I'm prosecuting his case.

This is all going to go into my questioning here in a minute.

Nigel, the heel commentator, is mentioning, well, everyone's playing along with Tony Storm's facade.

So there's been some mention on the show that this is a facade, a facade.

But at the same point, some people have been playing along with it like they were doing when they played along with it when she was Timeless Tony Storm.

And suddenly everybody was, oh, okay,

I'm in black and white now because you're standing next to me.

It was commonplace.

And Tony Storm comes out dressed like the rock and roll,

you know, cheerful, happy, peppy,

little girl.

And

then

Mariah May proceeds to both verbally and physically

demolish, decimate,

disseminate even Tony Storm.

She cuts the promo on her and tells her she means absolutely nothing to her.

She is nothing.

You're a joke.

The fans, you're nothing to them.

They laugh at you and they forget about you.

And as she's taking this browbeating,

she's looking all hurt and all downcast.

And

Maria May goes, I don't care about you.

I used you.

I used you to get what I wanted and I love it.

I love the way I feel right now.

And I will get off on humiliating you in your hometown in Australia.

And there's more downcast fucking look.

But then Tony Storm is like, Maria, Maria, I'm your biggest fan.

I've seen everything you've ever done.

You're an inspiration to me.

I want to be just like you.

And she hugs Maria Mae around the waist, like the pictures of Tony Khan hugging the talent.

Okay, so now, Brian, would you agree?

And the witness will be directed to answer, would you agree that that was a goddamn tongue-lashing that Maria Mae gave Tony Storm?

Mariah.

Yeah, you wouldn't want to be on the receiving end of a fucking just verbal beatdown like that, you fucking piece of shit, you scum under my shoe.

That was, it was very rude verbiage, wasn't it?

Very much so, yes.

And then

to come back and hug, you know, her as, oh, but I'm your biggest fan, blah, blah, blah.

And I want to be just like you well then

maria

or mariah if if you insist

pets her head and then

pushes her back and slaps the

out of goddamn

tony storm

and then again the second one was on the ear and or the side of the head but goddamn

and then grabbed her by the hair and fucking jerked her around and turned and bullied Tony Schiavone out of that.

Like, Tony Schiavani's now, okay,

I'll put anybody over at this point.

Just don't hurt me.

And then she had the title belt,

and she started, and she hit Tony Storm over the head with the belt, and then

started whipping her with a big, heavy women's belt like five times hard.

And here came the referees and the security.

And

Mariah mariah shoves aubrey ed in the face and hits tony storm two more times with the belt and slams her face in the mat and spits on her i mean she did everything but give her a fucking golden shower

right

can i jump in real quick at this point yes i was i was about to say and i want brian to jump in on this at this point i'm like wow they're doing a lot here on collision opposite Saturday night's main event.

You would think, again, I'm not saying I'm a big fan of the timeless Tony Storm stuff, but considering how over it is with their fans and considering some of the drech that gets on Wednesday nights, and considering the reaction that the next thing is about to get, yeah, the next thing, well, I won't spoil it, but why wasn't this on Wednesday?

I

honestly, I don't know, though, how anybody other than the Daly's place in Jacksonville Faithful might have reacted to this, but

basically

that Tony Storm has been verbally just destroyed, just to talk down to, and still tried to want to make up and hug.

And then

Mariah May has just beaten her and just spit on her and wiped her feet on her, just left her down in the middle of the fucking ring and just walked off from her.

Just like, fuck you, you're garbage.

And Tony Storm gets the mic, and while she's laying on the mat, you hear, what makes you think I've forgotten?

What makes you think our dance is done?

Oh my God.

I'll feel each scar forever and remember every drop of blood, but now it's my moment in the sun.

And she starts taking her clothes off in the middle of the ring.

And I'm thinking, my God, it's a Britney Spears fucking day.

She's going to strip naked.

Is this live?

As soon as she got on the mic, the first thing she said, as soon as she had the accent, the timeless accent, the place popped.

Yes.

Yes.

I'm going to raise a question to her about that in a second, though.

But first, yes, they popped.

And then when she started taking her clothes off, well, they popped.

And, you know, one would think they would.

It started looking like she had her old gear on underneath.

And

she said the hardest role you'll ever play is yourself and she took her pants off

and

well she am i lying it's just those are uh sentences you don't usually hear together well

and she had her old fish nets on and she said what you've just witnessed is the performance of a lifetime

and apparently from From that point, she, in a very proper accent, said she was going going to shove Mariah May up, back up her womb

where she came from and then spit her out and rip her tits off.

Am I lying?

You know, that's heat.

I mean, you don't really hear too many promos like that.

I'm going to rip your tits off.

After spitting you out my own womb,

I wonder if there's room in the womb.

for the size now that Mariah Mae is.

But the fans were going crazy.

The The fans were, this was the only thing on the whole show they gave two flying french-fried titty fucks about.

But my question to you, Brian,

is

even if, and you called it,

I acknowledge you again, I acknowledge you, my prognosticator-in-chief, that you said it was all going to be an act of blah, blah, blah.

But

how did it help her,

her being Tony Storm,

to not only be talked to like the worst type of scum that's ever existed on the earth but then get the teetotal dog beat out of her

first before she revealed that

it would

what how did it how did it benefit her coming back and pretending that she was the old tony storm that's what i i don't what how did this because they're going to fight in australia because tony storm's from australia

so the old storm or the new storm or any storm in between was still going to be from Australia.

But the point,

even if you work with the idea that there was a reason for her to come back and have amnesia in order to get Mariah Mae in the ring and the position or whatever she wanted her in,

if she came out to the ring just like they did here

and

let the heel get the heat by giving her the verbal dissection.

And then

her saying, well, then

I just want to be your friend.

You're not worthy.

If you want to be my friend, if you want to be my stooge or whatever the fucking term would be for with the people with the accents,

get down on your knees in front of me and kiss my foot.

And then Tony Storm could get down and then all of a sudden she could fucking leg dive Mariah May and take her shoe off and start beating beating Mariah Mae over the head with her fucking shoe because Tony Storm used to throw the shoe.

Watch the shoe, right?

Or was it watch the tits and duck the shoe?

Whatever it was.

She was throwing shoes at people, correct?

I believe so.

So she could beat Mariah Mae in the head with the fucking shoe, and Mariah May could roll out like, oh, she had one, and then she could do the fucking promo.

I'm back.

It was all a plan to be able to hit you in the head with a shoe.

But

why did she have to sit there and get the shit kicked out of her?

It's like The Undertaker when he rose from the dead, except she just, her gimmick rose from the dead, I guess.

I don't know if this show is risen from the dead.

But again, the people were more into that than anything

usually.

They've been waiting for something to happen with Tony Storm, and now they're going to have this match on this event.

I was about to say pay-per-view.

It's not a pay-per-view.

It's an event in Australia that no one knows when it starts, and no one knows what most of the lineup is, and no one's sure where it's going to air or how or live.

But otherwise than that, it's a can't-miss event.

That's two weeks from now.

Whenever you hear this, maybe.

And one more thing on this program, because you should have seen the last segment.

Remember, we said, my God, Hobbs, a star waiting to happen.

He's been so mismanaged.

Then they brought him back, mismanaged him again.

I'm begging, begging anybody who has a contact in the new TKO,

it ain't Titan Sports no more, but somebody in the office up there in Connecticut, please tamper with this son of a bitch's contract.

Please get him out of here.

You can't say that.

Now you're tampering.

Well, no, I'm not tampering with shit.

They're tampering with him.

And AEW has tampered with Hobbs till he's pretty much tampered out.

I mean, somebody, please buy him away from this indentured servitude he's in.

Do you know what they did?

No, you don't, because you didn't see it, but I'll tell you what they did.

I'll tell you exactly

by cracky.

Please.

What they did.

Hammoon.

So

Big Bill is in the ring doing a promo talking about Hobbs.

And apparently last week, Hobbes jumped him in the parking lot.

And so they've exiled Hobbs to Saturday nights.

And he called Hobbes out.

He said, I'm going to have him arrested and locked up for jumping me in a parking lot.

And Hobbs comes out, and there's security in front of the security, the black shirts standing and just in awkward stances, holding their hands out in front of him.

And he,

I can't say he beats them up.

He dispatches each one of them, and there's like seven of them

with one shot each.

Not necessarily that that's a bad thing, but a lot of this stuff didn't even

walk through it where it would look good or just, he's just,

boom, here's a forearm, boom, I've thrown you down.

And then they stay down

through everything I'm about to fucking say next, right?

They get in the ring, and Big Bill and Hobbs,

I can't say they get in a fight

because Hobbes hits Bill three times

with forearms or punches or what that Big Bill doesn't sell.

And then Bill shoves Hobbs back and then kicks Hobbs in his bad knee.

And that puts Hobbs down to both knees and selling.

And then he gives him a boot to the head.

And Hobbs takes a bump out over the second rope onto the rampway.

And he gets up and limps all the way back to the entrance like he's just got his ass kicked enough.

And he's fucking turntail and run now.

But apparently, they were supposed to fight back to the entranceway so the next abomination could occur.

But he just went there anyway.

And I'm like, what in the name of God is going on here?

And then Big Bill followed him to the entranceway and had a backpack.

Just a old fucking salvation, not salvation army, army surplus, or it could have got from the salvation army, a backpack with some shit in it.

And he hits Hobbes over the head with the backpack

and then dumps the stuff out.

And he's stolen Hobbes's knee brace because he's had the knee injury.

So now you're expecting, well, now he's stolen Hobbes' knee brace, so he's got no protection on his knee.

And there were three bricks,

three bricks in the backpack, and a set of leg irons.

Leg irons, three bricks, and a fucking knee brace.

Now,

I say leg irons, he was going to.

The intention was, probably,

we can only surmise from the evidence available, that he was going to handcuff Hobbs, but there was a long chain on these goddamn cuffs, right?

And that's usually, that's leg irons, but it gives you a little more room to work.

I've mentioned this before, Brian.

Yeah.

But what happened was the cuffs had got tangled up and I think locked on each other in the bag because he kept trying to untangle them and he's pulling, he's pulling.

And then he got down and just started beating Hobbs up again, bang, bing, bing.

And now Hobbs' face is bleeding.

He's potatoed him with something, but he never could get the goddamn

shackles un

shackle-fied so that they never came into play.

He didn't do anything with them.

He just left them.

Then

Big Bill continued to toy with Hobbes, punching him intermittently at a slow pace as they went to the announced desk, ran him into the announced desk, hit him with a chair, punched him again,

hit him with a chair again.

And then I noted, did Hobbes kill the seven security guards that were trying to stop him now that there's actual goddamn attempted murder and aggravated homicide taking place?

They're nowhere.

And then Hobbes was crawling, trying to get away.

And Big Bill with two more chair shots and kicked him in the leg and

threw his knee brace down and stomped on it and went to hit him with a brick.

Okay, we've come this far, right?

Hobbes is taking a pretty big ass whipping, right?

Suddenly, Hobbes

kicks Big Bill in the gut,

gives him six forearms and a kick in the balls

that Big Bill didn't go down for.

And I think the first gut kick was supposed to be a kick in the balls, but it was confusingly sold.

So the point is,

Hobbes has now hit this motherfucker in this fight with 10 forearms, a kick in the balls, and a goddamn confusing kick in the balls.

And he hasn't gone down yet

for Hobbes.

And then Hobbs grabs him and belly to bellies Big Bill off the stage through two tables to the floor.

Wow.

And both of them lay there dead.

And

so Hobbs got, again,

this badass, big jacked up.

He got the teetotal shit beat out of him.

He fought back enough to where the guy stopped beating him up, but never went down, even when he was kicked in the balls.

And then he had to sacrifice his own goddamn health and safety just to stop this fucking guy.

How does that get Hobbs over?

And

this was way too long, and this was fucking way too ridiculous.

And it made Hobbs look like alternately a pussy or a punk or a complete fucking idiot.

And there was 15 more minutes of the show but after that i was fucking done jesus christ poor hotness again somebody in connecticut

you know who you might be out there

you got to hire this guy away somehow make him an emancipated miner

well you know i mean the problem is there's a line of guys wanting to get out of there.

Ricky Starks, Ray Phoenix,

we assume.

Well, we don't even know that he wants to get out of there.

He just should.

Oh,

either that or

he just, he went off the stage, through the tables, to the concrete, and landed in the splinters of everything.

Maybe, Brian, maybe he can just, while he's laid up at the house selling these injuries, he can malinger a little bit on Tony Kahn's dime and he can set him up a brand new business.

Work for himself, powerhouse enterprises, work for himself, doing what?

Work from home selling stuff.

What?

Anything he wants to.

Because if he's partnered up with our friends over at Shopify, well, then he could sit right there at home and he could sell the essence of powerhouse on the internet and around the world.

Shopify could do everything.

They take ideas and concepts and they

lay out the websites and they have the stores and the storefronts.

And it's not like if 15 million people decide to order your essence all at the same time, their site's not going to crash because they're the big boys.

They're covering the world.

They're around the globe.

So that's what Hobbes ought to do.

And it's a new year.

It's a new time for resolutions.

You've been mulling over about starting your own business, being the master of your own destiny, rather than the manifest destiny that is foisted upon you by the evil overlords.

But you don't know how you can get started.

How do you come up with a brand?

How do you walk through this process and actually sell?

And more importantly,

get the revenue.

Well, that's with Shopify.

Because they can get your store up and running.

And the best time to start a new business is right now.

They make it simple to create your own brand.

And boy, I'll tell you, once the first time you're branded, it hurts, but after that,

it's not easy peasy.

Not that kind of brand.

Your brand, your business.

Well, branded, marked as the one who ran.

What do you do when you're branded?

And you know, you're a man.

See, you can sell autographed pictures of Chuck Connors

on the internet, and Shopify will help you

bring those to the people that like Chuck Connors.

You don't need coding or design skills.

Hell, if you're like most people selling these things today, you don't need any skills.

You just need an idea that Shopify can run with, and their powerful social media tools will help you connect up to create shoppable posts on your social media and your channels and help you sell everywhere.

And if you've got a store, let's say you got a widget store, Brian.

And you're selling, but you're not selling many widgets.

That's because your platform is not proper and you're not up to the modern standards.

That's where the professionals can help you out and they can take your widget store from midget sales to gidget sales.

Because you know, gidget, she always loved those widgets.

Right now, folks, with Shopify, your first sale is closer than you think.

It's bearing down on you right now.

You better get ready.

And you can sign up for a $1 a month trial period right now at shopify.com slash JCE.

That's all lowercase for that JCE, by the way.

That's the secret code that gets you the $1 a month trial period, shopify.com slash JCE.

Because again, for a dollar, a dollar trial period, for heaven's sake.

What in the world?

How can they not make you a dollar?

I mean, right there's a dollar.

That's worth a dollar.

Do I hear $2?

All right, enough of the ka-ching, but of course you'll get your own.

You don't go on like that.

You'll get your own proverbial ka-ching

when you cash in by going with shopify.com/slash JC $1 a month trial period right now.

Get it while it's hot.

That's right, Shopify.

Yes, that's the thing that I mentioned.

All righty.

You know what?

Would you like to talk about SmackDown, Brian?

Not really.

Well, because we're not, so I just wanted to make sure I wasn't going to hurt your feelings.

Folks, in three hours,

in three hours, one noteworthy thing happened on SmackDown on January 24th.

Kevin Owens.

Cut a hell of a promo on Matthew McConaughey.

Or is it McConaughey?

McConaughey, McConaughey?

McConaughey.

Did you ever think that you would utter the words or hear the words uttered?

Kevin Owens cut a hell of a promo on Matthew McConaughey.

McConaughey.

McConaughey.

I didn't think I'd ever heard about McConaughey, no.

Or McConaughey.

Do you hear that?

That wood chipper out there

right now?

I wasn't sure which side that was on.

I have the headphones on.

The lady that lives diagonal across the road from me on that property, they've had a lot of damage back there in the forest with the high winds last year.

And now that all the leaves are off the trees and the ice is melting, she's apparently decided to have a tree crew come and grind up said damage and take it away.

So you might be hearing some of this.

But anyway, yeah, that was SmackDown.

Hear that?

That was SmackDown.

So

you know what we did, don't you, Brian?

We actually

recorded,

and there was some technical reasoning for this, which I won't get into the minutiae of, but we recorded the Saturday night's main event review in an earlier recording session before we've just recorded the first part of this program that is containing the Saturday night's main event review.

Is that clear?

To me or to the audience?

Well, anybody.

Is anybody out there knowing what the fuck is going on?

Well, we are going to travel now to the past where we recorded something for the future for this show right here.

Well, then let's go back there.

All righty, Brian.

Well, you know, you know what time it is?

You're my obsession.

You're my obsession.

Does that even now that we're looking back on everything that Vince McMahon ever had a hand on or a finger in or whatever the case may be.

You're my obsession.

Aren't the following words, what do you want me to be to make you sleep with me?

Or am I misquoting this popular tune from the 80s?

No, I mean, I think those are the words, but do you remember the words of Vince McMahon's standback song from Pile Driver?

Boy, there's all kinds of fucking lines.

Pile driver.

No wonder he had hemorrhoids, but

what were the...

I remember the performance and I remember more than the words, honestly.

The gall of him, as Jackie Fargo would say.

I was just a boy.

Everybody told me what I should do and who I should be.

I got some advice.

I finally have to say, stand back.

They never understood the kind of man I am.

Wait, are you reading that?

Is this on your wall?

I pulled up the website here.

Oh, goddammit.

There's a website for the lyrics to all right.

Go ahead.

Vince McMahon, track eight.

Producers David Wolf and Rick Derringer.

God damn it.

Rock and roll.

Hoochie Coo.

They never understood the kind of man I am.

I do my own thinking, got a lot of big plans.

Stand back.

For all of you who want to bring me down, I have news.

Stand in my way.

I promise you'll lose.

And then here's the big ending.

I'm a man running wild, headed for the top, never slowing down and never gonna stop.

Along the way, you're gonna see a lot lot of men drop.

Baby, won't you drop?

Baby, baby, baby, won't you drop?

Stand back.

Stand back

and cover your head.

All righty then.

Well, everybody.

He's not involved in this anymore.

Here now, Brian, because it's a new Saturday night.

It's a new main event.

And it was the same old network, NBC.

and they were in San Antonio, Texas.

And

holy jumping jeehasafat, they weren't at the Joe and Harry Freeman Coliseum.

I'll tell you that.

Or the junction.

Or

there was no malfunction at the junction.

Actually, maybe there was.

I think there was a tribute to the junction, the audio here at the start.

Well,

yeah,

we'll talk about that in a second because I expected Steve Stack to come in and say, well, hold on now.

But no, San Antonio, I mean, in its day, in the territory days, you know, drew

some houses at the old Freeman Coliseum back in the 60s and 70s.

But by the time even that I was in world class, we go to San Antonio 20 grand.

You know, tickets were 10, 7, and 5 or whatever, but

16,406 people and says, sold out

and

the brand new arena, whatever they fucking call it.

And you know, here's where when they open these programs like they're doing now with the stars walk in, everybody's walking in, some of them are drinking coffee.

I think Esteen ought to come in just eating a fucking Tim Horton's cheeseburger with the wrapper on it and everything.

But you can tell that they have no qualms that people are going to leave their show in mass numbers after the first 15 minutes.

And remember, and

I don't know whether Tony and them have just given up on this in some cases or not.

They still do it sometimes, but for a while there, they drop the open of the dynamite.

They just, boom, we're in the arena.

It's Wednesday night and somebody's coming to the ring.

Because that used to be the old desperation theory of Shitstain and a few other people that everybody's got an attention span, you know, like a junkie with a clicker on the morphine drip.

And you got to do something from the start.

Boom, here we are.

Oh, there's wild action.

They're showing their fucking talent walking.

There was like 10 of them, wasn't it, that walked in on this particular open of the program.

And they don't think that anybody's going anywhere.

This is part of the show.

We're showing you stars on the walk of fame.

They're confident is what I'm saying to you, Brian.

And why shouldn't they be?

And you're right.

I hadn't even thought about that.

Just the way they kind of shotgun right into the opening, a Moxley promo right into the opening.

It's kind of,

you know, you think of it as a late 90s kind of thing, but in a lot of ways, it was desperation and eventually could lead to burnout.

Yeah, please don't look away.

Don't look away.

But no, I mean, you see, you wait to see who's going to be the next person walking in.

Walking in.

Oh, my God.

Who else will be there?

And it's always the same people.

Oh, it's everyone else who's booked on every other show they do.

But at the same time, the announcement.

And Ted DiBiase in a catalogue.

Yeah, and Ted D.

Ned now with DiBiase.

Laughing like he just took a hit of Nitrous in the fucking limo.

He struggled out of that limousine.

They should have been giving him a hit of something just to get him to his feet.

They got him the lowest car they could find.

You see how low down that car was?

Well, now that's one of the new sport model limousines.

But anyway, the point is the announcers are setting the stage for the show with the voiceover.

Here's what Joe's going to be involved in tonight, and here's what Sam's going to be involved in.

And it's setting the stage.

They're not rushing anybody.

They're like, this is going to be a professionally done program, and we don't see nobody in our rearview mirror.

And in the Attitude era, or in some cases, with Tony still to this day, and a lot over last fall when they were doing the media rights thing, it was like, hi, everybody, welcome.

Oh, shit.

They're fighting.

And off we go.

Anyway, they did a great editing and production on the

compilation of the old Saturday Night's Main Event and New Clips, Obsession.

Joe Tessatori and Jesse Ventura at the podium that has now been christened the Okerland position.

And I got it.

I'll get you.

You never used that position like ever on Saturday Night's Main Event.

That was for like the mass TV tapings.

They would do like the five-hour TV tapings.

And they would do promos for the Saturday and Sunday morning shows.

They never did that on Saturday Night's Main Event.

He did interviews in the back, Okerlin, in front of a curtain.

Yeah, or lockers.

There were lockers.

There were lockers too, but for a lot of the period of time on that show, the curtains was kind of the look.

Not there.

So I don't know why they're, it makes no sense.

Well, it's nice they're remembering him because they basically they have to have Jesse

in a prominent position, but he ain't going to be out there for two whole hours.

So they got the podium set up and Joke and Keith and Jesse, I was going to say I was going to give it to you.

Your man, Jesse the body,

he was up and on more here than the first time, I thought.

I thought the first time the because I ran off Hogan.

No, now, come on now.

We'll cover that in a second.

Let's finish with Jesse, but his joke, whatever it was on the first show fell kind of flat he would not look at the camera because he wanted to look at the people blah blah blah but he seemed more energetic and he had more

and he had more information on what was going on here as well i thought or at least was able to read it better maybe they

maybe they put in bigger bigger letters for him

but

we have heard Can we just cover it now since he ain't on the show and wasn't mentioned on the show?

Hulk Hogan, obviously, was not on the show.

And we talked about it when we were recording the last program and had just heard

that he wasn't on the show.

Oh, it's announced Hulk Hogan will not be at Saturday night's main event.

And we were, what the fuck was Jesse run him off or because he was booed out of the building or whatever?

Now,

explain this to me.

Did his, he has pictures out,

or at least they were on the internet.

I assume they were dated properly, of him at his son, Nick's wedding?

He double booked himself.

How did he not know the date of his son's wedding originally?

Or did, did, did they just have him do all the promos?

Or didn't they come out and say in front of God and everybody, Hulk Hogan will be on Saturday night's main event in January?

Or did we just all imagine that?

And then they, because we all imagined it, they announced that he wouldn't be.

What, how does...

Nick, I have to pull out and I can't lose any face.

Go marry someone, please, this weekend.

Yeah, I mean, what was this like a rush job, a shotgun wedding?

How do you

come up when he was recording the commercial spots for Saturday night?

That's what he's somebody.

We're not trying to implicate anybody here.

We're trying to get to the truth, the bottom of a

kind of a confusing situation.

Was he truthfully advertised as everybody thought he was?

Because they announced he wasn't going to be there.

No, they announced he was going to be there.

Well, then, how the fuck does anybody know if he, how that he could not figure out that this was the same day his son was getting married

unless they planned this wedding from

woe to go in fucking four weeks or whatever?

Yeah, how did that phone call go?

Did they actually call Triple H?

Who does Hulk Hogan call?

And what does he say the week of?

Days out of the show.

That don't work for me, bro.

I don't.

So, but there were pictures of...

Now, did he get married?

Did his son get married, but it wasn't this date?

And they just sent this out?

Now, I don't.

Oh, I didn't see the pictures.

Were there pictures that were published?

I saw on Twitter that somebody said, hey, all you Hogan haters, he was at his son's wedding.

Okay, why was his son's wedding the day of Saturday night's main event, which Hulk Hogan was billed for for at least a month and a half, two months, and did commercial spots for?

That's the question I've been asking for the last 10 minutes.

Do you listen to me anymore?

That's the question I've been asking is how would this happen?

How could and you know what?

We've heard from a lot of people.

Hogan was booed in L.A.

Jimmy Hart did an interview somewhere, and he basically just put it off as being about politics.

We heard from people in Dallas where he got booed, not just when Punk mentioned him, but whenever they they played him on the video screen.

Yeah, well, no, and actually, to be more precise, they cheered when he punk said he was going to kick his ass.

Yeah, that's right.

And they've been booing when they play at house shows or wherever, when they play the apparently the Hogan beer commercial, they've been booing the fucking beer spot.

But we've heard from people who have written in and they all have a number of different dates.

It's like, you know, I saw.

They did something where they announced them in like 2017 and people booed.

So it's not like this is something new and something going away and

everything adds on to it.

It's getting bigger.

Everything bigger.

That's what I'm saying.

Everything adds on to it, but especially running away and all of a sudden your son's getting married.

What the fuck is that?

That's not normal in any way.

All of a sudden, you get a booking and you're the biggest star and you're in the commercials and you're like, well, I can't be there.

My son's decided to get married this weekend.

And obviously it's going to last.

Well, come on now.

We did, it could be,

they could be childhood sweethearts.

We don't know.

Oh, yeah.

But anyway, well, that now that we've established that Hogan was not on the program,

what was on the program, at least the first part of it, you alluded it, alluded it, you alluded to it in an eluding fashion.

Earlier was it happens to everybody, network television, even.

You could hear the Spanish announce team

underneath all the audio for

several minutes, I guess, into the thing, I heard again, I didn't hear, read on Twitter that people were saying, ah, we can't hear anything else.

I ordered the pay-per-view on real television the way that General David Sarnoff intended it.

It wasn't a pay-per-view.

No, I'm sorry.

I was watching it on real television.

Well, okay.

God damn it.

I always order the pay-per-views on real TV, too.

But no, I was watching on actual television, cable television, So I could hear it

underneath everything, but it didn't drown really anything out.

But I heard other people, were they streaming on the cock or what were they doing that it was like, oh, my God, we can't hear anything else?

Oh, no, no.

I think Peacock had no issues.

And then I could tell you here on NBC, it was too loud.

That's why I went to Peacock because they were doing it over Jesse Ventura.

It's one thing doing it over the commentary of the matcher, you know, just doing commentary in another language.

It was like they were repeating, i guess or just doing their own intro

while jesse ventura and joe tell story's up there well they weren't even pausing like they were the interpreters right right you in it was just a steady stream of conversation

i i don't know but point is it was on my

apparatus it was faint but i could hear it but it didn't stop me from hearing what everybody was saying but you

were just run out of the room by well i was run the peacock which is just a couple pushes of the button on the tv so that was no big deal but yeah it was really bad it was aew level we kill them when they do it this was real amateur hour on nbc national broadcast i mean that's that's really really bad but how long did it last then because it pre during the first match or by the first match i really i wasn't noticing i think it was at least well you don't know how long it lasted because you well i heard feedback from people i want to say it was at least five minutes six minutes well damn their eyes then how dare they but it was a tribute to southwest Championship Wrestling and Steve Sacks and whatever the other guy's name was who would just be saying whatever he was saying and then just put the mic.

Whatever he was saying happened to end whenever Steve Sachs comments ending because they put the mic in front of the wrestler at the same time.

And the thing is, when they were doing the color on the matches, couldn't they at least have stood at opposite walls of the studio?

When they were six feet away from each other with a handheld stick mic,

you're just hearing blueberry.

All right, anyway, let's get to this program.

Because we got Michael Cole and Pat McAfee at Ringside with Joe and Jesse up at the Okerland position.

Can I say something real quick?

Go ahead.

I'm sick of fucking Pat McAfee.

Just screaming like an idiot for no reason.

Like, not like genuine screaming, but almost like I'm supposed to scream here.

I can't take him anymore.

Do you think he was green?

Well,

damn you.

We liked him at the start.

He was good at the start.

He is genuine.

He's a fan.

He's excited.

He is a personality.

But now, do you think he is trying?

He started,

because he is a high-strung individual.

He started out at 100 miles an hour when he started the job.

And now every time he comes back, does he feel like he has to be more excited and more over the top to the point where now he's just bouncing off the fucking walls?

And he just screams.

He just screams,

like, oh, fuck, stop.

He's trying to kick it up a notch, but he started at the top of the fucking notch thing.

So,

you know what?

I hate to say because I know Pat McAfee's the guy making the most money, probably, of all those commentators, but it probably should have been Wade Barrett or even Corey Graves out there in terms of doing the best job for the show.

But I get it.

He's the bigger star.

They want him on the NBC thing, but he was off.

Oh, my God.

Well, now he said good things about you in the past, so you don't need to.

And I deserve him.

I'm the great Brian Lass, but he was awful on commentary here.

Just

you don't want him to lose faith in you, thinking that, well, maybe one of these days I can impress him.

Well, you got to have faith.

Oh, you got to have faith.

I had faith until I saw that the first match featured the refrigerator,

Nia Jax.

I got to say that the women's title, The Fridge versus Rhea Ripley, how long before Hollywood discovers Rhea Ripley and she's gone and away out of our lives, on to make the big money and

swim in the ocean.

You'll know as soon as she starts laser removing all those tattoos.

No, that's part of it.

I'm telling you, she's going to be

the goddamn.

There are a couple of movies, they're going to be like, hey, you're a good-looking girl.

Can you get rid of the fucking tattoos?

No, she is going to be some kind of gothic warriorous that's going to have astray,

the

Ripley and the Furious, and she's going to do 12 of them and retire to her own island.

She'll make $5 billion.

Perfect, just like that.

I don't know how good this math is.

Where did you pull this up?

$5 billion.

Well, that's because they're going to gross a fucking fortune.

And she has a piece of it?

Yes, because they're going to have to pay her to have her out there with the sword and the fucking motorcycle and motorcycle and all these things that she's slaying all the post-apocalyptic fucking mutant minions with.

She has a sword and a motorcycle?

She's got a motorcycle and a sword and a cannon.

Hold on, is she holding it?

You know what?

It's a double barrel cannon.

Does she just wheel it along with her motorcycle?

No, it's propped on the front of the motorcycle.

And while she's got her hands on the fucking motorcycle fucking handlebars, she sticks her tits into the end of the double barrel cannon to fire it you've crossed the line you've crossed the line well no because there's there's the buttons in there and boom and it's her booby cannon you know Hollywood's still not making titty cannon movies well at least not since Russ Meyer died the field is wide open

well again anyway we'll just see about that the sword on a motorcycle though that could uh

yeah the double barrel cannon and a loaded boot a loaded boot a loaded boot that when she fucking taps the heel heel, then she can kick somebody and the toe of the boot explodes.

Oh, so like, well, how does that not kill her?

Well, because

she's kicking the motherfucker with the blowing up foot.

But how big is this explosion that it just would only kill the one person and not damage the other person?

She's kicking them in the head.

She just limps off.

All right.

Well, you know what?

I actually,

this was a good match.

I enjoyed it, but I'm really enjoying the talk about this Rhea Ripley.

It's not a trilogy of films.

It's a.

No, it's an entire franchise.

I'm telling you, it's going to go on and on and on, much like this impromptu bit.

But they did have a match, which, and I agree with you.

I didn't mind this as normally as much as I mind the refrigerator because they kept it moving.

It was short.

It didn't overstay its welcome.

And they kept it moving.

And

Rhea, again, is somewhat sturdy enough to bear up under some of the refrigerator's balance issues.

And she's over like crazy.

They're chanting, mommy, mommy.

And they went back and forth

enough to where

Rhea can sell, but you don't want to leave the fridge in control too long because then.

So they kept it fresh.

And did you see the crossbody

off the top rope to the floor by Rhea Ripley after foiling the bonsai?

She's actually a grown adult person.

Fucking, of course, she was falling on a human bark a lounger, but still,

that was impressive.

And then boom, boom, boom.

Finally, the fridge took over and hit a bonsai drop and went for another one.

And Rhea was up

after after that bonsai, which lays everybody else out, but she withstood it, got up under her crotchel area and got the electric chair a kick to the head.

And the riptide came in low this

particular night, but at least it came in.

She got the riptide on her.

Boom.

One, two, three.

And it wasn't 10 minutes, and I think it was perfect.

Yeah, good match.

And it looked like a struggle.

And Rhea handles Nia Jax.

In some cases, I mean, if you talk to Rhea, it may have been.

And Nia, Nia, and Rhea, not Nia.

Rhea?

Nia's not even her name.

Nia's her name.

Nia on a night.

No, Rhea handles Nia Jax better than most, and she does power moves with her.

And again, it looks like a struggle, and I'm sure it is,

but she gets the best out of her, I think.

You know, since Britt Baker is

MIA, maybe Rhea Ripley could get the dentistry degree for pulling teeth, having a match with the.

But anyway, yes, I applaud.

Hold on,

let me applaud

the efforts of everybody's father.

All right, shut up now.

And Rhea is super over, and Rhea is ridiculously over.

That's the thing.

She's a star, and they need to just keep feeding her.

threats of various kinds and

see when you know Hollywood calls.

But that's what I thought about that, Brian.

Well, like I said, I thought it was a good match, and so far, a good start to Saturday night's main event.

Yes, and so far, but we'll fix that too.

Medusa and Mark Henry were at ringside.

I had forgotten until I saw Mark.

But he basically left there, went and got paid to never be seen for like five years by Tony Khan.

And now he's back in

the WWE, in the Hall of Fame.

And there you go.

Yeah, I mean, it's nothing we haven't heard from other people, but I've seen some interviews at Mark Henry where at least the quotes I read, you know, the typical stuff.

No one in AEW who was a young person listened to him.

He had advice, but no one wanted to hear it.

And then everyone's struggling, but everyone's doing what they want.

So, but it's a mess.

Well, but what wasn't a mess

was the next match for the Intercontinental Championship, Braun Breaker defending against good old Seamus.

You know,

occasionally our friend Seamus has a banger, and I'm trying to think what one of them was with Drew, wasn't it?

I think one of them was a three-way with Drew and Gunther, maybe.

And I want to say maybe him and Gunther.

This was maybe the best match I've seen him in

a very long time.

Well,

yeah, but again, is that faint praise?

And I mean, it's Braun,

but

I think, unfortunately, Sheamus is like Drew McIntyre.

For a while, Drew was just there.

And remember, this fucking guy again.

And now he became

the most interesting guy in the WWE.

And Seamus is just there, and he's been there, but he ain't changing anything.

He ain't got a tan.

He still wears his ruffian outfit, and he beats on people's chests and has banger after banger after banger.

But

I mean, there's nothing wrong with what he's doing, but it's just, is it old?

Is it not that exciting?

And is it just, it needs a break?

What is the problem here?

He's been there a long time.

Jesse Ventura on commentary talked about, and maybe that's one of the reasons why I like the match so much, was Ventura.

But he talked about he was at some show where Seamus won a battle royal or something,

and that was over 10 years ago.

He's been there a long time.

So you're saying now that there's fans coming into the building, sitting down, and the father looks down at his little son and says, see that fucking pale, red-headed fucking guy over there?

Boy, when I was a kid, he had a banger.

Yeah, I don't know.

I mean, again, you don't want to advocate for people just being fired and you don't want Tony just to hire everyone WWF.

Let's go, but

they got to do something different with Sheamus just to make him interesting.

Paint him if you have to.

Paint him?

Paint him.

Tan him.

Do sublish.

Shave all the hair off of him and make a freak out of it.

I don't know, but just do something different because he looks like nobody else.

But so it's not like shave his head and make him a freak?

You know, but he's just, we've seen that same pale fucking guy having the bangers for a while now.

And we like Bron Breaker's bangers better.

Shave your heads be a freak, the banger angel.

There you go.

Or the

Scott, is he Scottish or Irish?

Now, I keep, I know, yes, everybody's Irish.

Okay.

The Irish angel.

He was, you know, he stood behind a fucking jet engine when he was a child.

And it scalded all.

This is a Jack Pfeffer story for the lady angel.

It scalded all the hair off of his body, ladies and gentlemen, and

stripped him of pigment.

And now he'll be in your town next week.

The horrible awfulness of it can never be forgotten.

Make him a freak.

He's halfway there.

I kid.

Anyway, they had a good match here.

I love Braun Breaker.

They did a deal for the break spot where Seamus was going to come off the stairs and clothesline him or whatever, and Braun met him with a spear and hurt his ribs.

And that way, Sheamus could sell his ribs for the rest of the match.

And

Braun got the Brekensteiner.

flawlessly ran into Seamus' kick and got his foot on the ropes and got a big pop.

They love Braun, even though Braun's a heel.

So you got that Steiner vibe, but he got a pop getting his foot on the ropes.

Do you think

in AEW?

I don't know if most of these guys could get a pop if the bottom rope cut off their head, much less if they just broke the count by putting their foot on it.

And finally,

Braun hit the spear in Seamus' bad ribs after Sheamus had gone for his big kick, but oh, his ribs failed him.

And then Braun hit the spear, boom, one, two, three.

Shit, you're gonna, these guys look like they can do damage to each other without fucking coming off the top rope and falling through 14 different pieces of furniture.

Spear in the bad ribs, boom, that's good.

Thank you.

One, two, three.

And it gave him an out, old Sheamus.

At the same time, Braun continues his upward trajectory.

Decisive victory looked good.

The spear, I'm not a big fan of the spear in general, but it looked good.

Looked like his head just bounced off his belly.

It looked really good.

Jesse Ventura did good.

They really maximized what they could get out of him.

You know,

Jim Ross may be around the same age.

We see how AEW uses him.

Ventura's been disconnected from the product for a long time.

They use him just enough.

Yeah, and he was better prepared here.

So I think he was into it.

If he's watching that show Monday to get caught up, this is what he would be into, Bron Breaker.

Yeah.

So, and plus, I'm sure they, you know, he, the story was that he didn't like to do a lot of preparation in WCW,

whereas Jim Ross was a preparation freak, and that was start of friction there.

But 30 years later, and he isn't in the building every week, I'm pretty sure he, for network television, he put the study in on this one.

So, yes.

So,

you know,

I didn't mean to be so hard on him on the first one, but I was like, eh, you know, it just seemed to me like he seemed, he sounded a little

old.

But on this one, he had, he had, he still got a little old in his voice, but he's got some piss in his delivery.

Speaking of pissing in your delivery, Sean Michaels was up next.

Boy, Brian, the guys who were so good-looking and such sex symbols 30 years ago, they must regret it now because they had so far to fall.

Whereas I look reasonably

similar,

even skinnier, than the way I did 30 years ago because there, you know.

Wasn't much to write home about then to begin with, but I didn't have so far to fall.

Well, plus you're probably more attractive now because you're a multi-millionaire.

Well, that does lend me some type of animal magnetism, but it's hard to quantify.

That changes anything.

But speaking of changing anything, boy, howdy, Michaels with gray hair and 160 pounds with a cowboy hat.

He did the sexy boy entrance, but

it didn't look as

salacious as as it once did.

But at least he didn't jump up and down humping anything with his pants stuffed in the front with a giant cod piece.

Well, Vince wasn't there to enjoy it.

Anyway, Sean Michaels made his entrance, and

Ted DiBiase, Dory Funk Jr., and Hacksaw Duggan were at ringside.

Probably if you'd have given them fucking tomatoes, they could have each had reasons for pelting Michaels.

Some cameraman being yelled at by Marty Funk.

Hey, wait a minute.

No, no, I kid.

I kid.

She wasn't even there.

Duggan was meant Duggan, no matter where he goes to this day.

The USA immediately got them all going, and then the hoe, and it still works.

But again, we said Marty wasn't there.

So what are you talking about?

The hoe.

Oh, come on now.

So

Michaels was hosting the contract signing.

And he made it clear that he had one job there

to get these contracts signed between Owens and Cody Rhodes.

And Nick Aldous couldn't do it, but I'm going to do it.

And he introduced Kevin Owens.

And Owens comes out in a Cody Sucks Eggs shirt as a tribute to Terry Funk.

You remember that shirt, Brian?

That's funk's in Florida.

What, 79?

That's right.

Pete Lederberg owns those photos.

I thought you were going to say Pete Lederberg owns that shirt.

He owns those eggs.

Well, and I'll tell you what, he sucked on a few of them too.

What?

Will you be nice?

What is wrong with you?

Pete Lederberg sucks eggs.

I have it on good authority from Terry Funk and Kevin Owens.

Anyhow, so there's...

There's eight people laughing at this right now, but we will go back to the mainstream portion of this.

They're blowing snot right now, those eight people, though.

And Barry Rose is giggling.

Where's Klon?

Anyway, back to the review.

Hey, Hey, so Cody then gets introduced.

He has a big ovation and the singing and the whoa.

And immediately, Cody and Kevin go to the center of the ring and they got the game faces on and they're staring at each other.

And

Michael says, Would you please sit down?

And they don't move.

Say, okay, we're going to do it that way, huh?

So they

refuse to sit down, but Michael says, one way or another, they have to sign it.

Now, Brian, let me ask you one

question, clarification, though, here I need.

On TV the other night, when Aldous said that you guys are going to have to sign these contracts and an addendum to the contract,

I thought we were going to have some reveal

of some extra stipulation or,

you know, fucking somebody's got to goddamn eat dog food or whatever the fuck, right?

Was there an addendum and I missed

I must.

You remember what I'm saying?

You heard him say that, Aldous, on TV the other night.

That's right.

So the point was we were expecting when they sign this, there's going to be some kind of surprise to somebody.

Why wasn't Aldous there?

Well, because he couldn't get the job done.

And Michaels is, you know,

a bigger name for network.

I don't know.

But point.

Yeah, because he's known for getting the job done.

Yeah.

Get out of here.

You're noted for always signing contracts whenever he's supposed to.

Nevertheless, my advice for you, go home, order a nitro girl.

Hey,

they weren't just being

ordered about.

Apparently, they were.

Apparently, they may have been.

I don't know.

But let's go back to this.

Back in his cross-eyed review.

So Cody signed it immediately.

And then Owens looked at it and dropped the pen and started talking and cutting a promo on Cody

and telling Cody that he cared more about their friendship more than Cody ever did.

And finally, Cody said, enough.

And he cut, and you can see the dusty coming out.

He cut the fired-up promo.

I'm focused on who I'm defending this title against at WrestleMania.

I need to get you out of the way.

He said, just sign a contract.

He almost said fucking.

I almost said fucking.

Sign a fucking contract.

He should have said fucking.

And

Owens is like, I'm the true champion.

I'm going to win.

I'm going to get everything that I deserve because I deserve this.

And Sean's like, dude, you just sound jealous.

And I said, Mr.

Pot to Mr.

Kettle.

I don't think that Sean Michaels has any goddamn room to

when somebody's bitching about what somebody else got.

The irony was all over this.

And then Owens started knocking Michaels.

Well,

I won't do this.

I won't lose my smile.

And so then Owens signed the contract and put it back in the deal and smacked Sean Michaels in the chest with it.

And then Michaels calls for the referee to hang the belts above the ring at the contract signing.

Yeah, it's not like they're going to keep going up in the sky to the other building.

Yeah, yeah, because it's.

They're at San Antonio here, Indianapolis.

That's to the way they would have to gone sideways to the to the east.

So the referee hung the belts, and at Royal Rumble, one man will climb the ladder and walk out champion.

And Michael shakes Cody's hand, and then immediately Owens punches Cody in the face and spins Michaels around and goes for the package pile driver.

But Cody super kicks fucking Owens off top of Michaels, and then Michaels super kicks Owens.

And Owens rolls out to the floor and gets to cross another thing off of his bucket list that he got super kicked by Sean Michaels.

But I and I get to make a comeback.

Who would have thought I would actually be this interested, though,

in anything that Kevin Owens was doing at this point?

I'm, you know, I'm liking this shit.

And the t-shirts, whether it's the

son of a son of a sea cook or whatever the fuck he had the other night, or, you know, Cody Sucks Eggs, the little nods, when he had the match with Jey Uso, he was wearing a Naomi shirt or Jimmy or

whichever one it would pertain to.

He's very, he's being

a lot of shirts.

Well, he gets them made cheap up there at the mall.

But anyway, what did you think about this contract signing and or interaction?

I thought it was good.

And I get, you know.

You want to do it just because it looks nice to hang the belts there.

But again, if you think about it for a second, it's ridiculous that you're doing this there.

It's like pointing at the WrestleMania sign.

This isn't WrestleMania.

You're already booked.

Why are you still pointing at that fucking sign?

But I guess we're about to see that season start.

But no,

I agree with you.

I was kind of bored with Owens a few months back.

They got me interested again.

When he was just like screaming and getting mad backstage for no reason, he was boring.

This is good stuff.

And...

It'll be an interesting match because Owens likes to go too far.

And Cody probably recognizes this needs to be a kick-ass match.

Let's see what it is.

Well, but at the same time, Cody recognizes it needs to be a kick-ass match, but also Cody recognizes he needs to have another kick-ass match two months later at WrestleMania.

So I don't expect him to dive off the fucking roof.

I think somebody would put the kibosh on that if he tried to, just for sanity's sake.

But you know the thing, Brian, is I'm worrying.

I'm worried about Steen's health.

Really?

Of course, Kevin Owens.

You know, those of us who have been close personal friends of his for years, we still call him old Steeny Boy.

Kevin Steen, Kevin Owens, whichever.

I'm worried about his health because, you know, he's lost weight since the Ring of Honor days.

He still

has somewhat of a Hayman-esque shape, just not with the

gravitational pull or the overall girth and width.

But also he's got that ghostly pallor to his skin where it's kind of pale, but it's kind of gray.

And every once in a while, if he gets mad and he yells loud enough, you can see blood pulsing through his veins.

He's so opaque.

I'm wondering if his liver is in good shape.

What do you think?

Do you have any?

I can only wonder about Kevin Owens' liver.

Does it quiver?

We don't know.

Well, now, see, he's not a big drinker.

So I'm not saying he's going to damage his liver that way.

But at the same time, you know, he's not a guy that you can envision out early in the morning on a Sunday doing the road work like Rocky with a towel around his neck, jogging through the streets.

He's bad for your knees.

Well, and that's another thing.

You know, it's not like he's a spring chicken anymore either.

And, you know, he ate a lot of that Tim Hortons because he's Canadian and that shit'll.

turn your liver into fucking sludge in a heartbeat.

And, you know, Brian, your liver is the second largest organ in your body.

It's responsible for over 500 functions.

You could draw an analogy to like the motor in your car or the battery, maybe, because if the battery goes dead, well, I don't even think your turn signals are going to work.

So 500 functions, if your body, Brian, is down 500 functions because your liver is not in proper running order.

Well,

who knows what you'll be able to do?

I mean, one of those 500 functions, it might even be the hydraulics on the penis.

You never know what your liver is in charge of.

I don't know about that, and let's not speak about the biggest organ in my body.

But let's get back to.

Well, the liver is your body's filter.

That's right.

It flushes out unwanted elements.

It breaks down what you consume into the essential nutrients.

In other words.

It's the fast-forward button on the DVR watching dynamite.

There you go.

You can't live without it.

And if you're eating something,

well, let's say, for example, you eat a Tim Horton's cheeseburger.

And now your liver is needed to help break that down into the nutrients.

Elsewhere, when you take a shit the next morning, you're just going to shit the whole cheeseburger.

It's just going to go in one end and out the other.

I don't think that's how things work.

Well, if it's a physical level,

it doesn't get broken down.

The liver produces and regulates cholesterol, stores vitamins and minerals, impacts digestive and metabolic health, among many other things.

So, right there, your cholesterol could go through the roof if you don't have a good liver.

You lose the place where you're storing all those vitamins and minerals like a squirrel storing nuts for the winter.

There's a whole goddamn vitamin store in the corner of your liver you don't even know about.

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Turmeric.

Turmeric?

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No, no, it's not.

You don't read old Hindu texts.

What the hell are you talking about?

Oh, yes.

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Oh, yeah.

Bhagavad Gita, Jim Cornette.

Let's hear more about your Hindu stuff.

There was a big trade before the big

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Back to Saturday night's main event.

Well, you know, my boy came up next.

My boy, Jacob Fatu, my son.

My boy, my adopted son.

If only someone had known before six months ago that Jacob Fatu could get over like this, if only some

bright beacon of knowledge, a shiny, if Captain Lou Albano, the guiding light, was still around,

he could have told them, but nobody knew until suddenly he burst upon a scene.

You know, I hate to say I told you so, Brian.

Well, you were certainly the loudest and the first and the biggest champion of his for years.

And

if you remember, years ago under the different regime, we heard that they refused to hire him because of his criminal record in the past.

And again, I hate to leave that dangling

because it's not like he's

a fucking international goddamn spy.

The man's a killer, folks.

No, he was in his younger days in California.

I believe he probably got into a few scrapes and things here and there, but I don't believe that he's ever committed murder.

So the point is, you know, and I remember I've talked about this in the past, going back 30 years.

Vince, it took him a while before he would

agree to bring Bam Bam Bigelow back because he couldn't get into Canada.

And, you know, so, but the point is, this guy's talent, and he's an adult now, and obviously has not been involved with the criminal justice system for a while.

And he just, this is all I saw on Twitter.

After the show was over is Jacob Fatu is one of the biggest stars of wrestling.

And this is the way you get somebody over.

Jacob Fatu, and his opponent, by the way, was Brown Strongman.

Braun Strowman.

Sometimes people mispronounce it that way.

And yes, he's been a guy that they've used at a top level on and off for a while there in the past.

But right now,

he's not particularly that integral,

but he has some cachet with the audience that he is ginormous.

So you use this guy, you don't just humiliate him,

but you give him some ability to fucking take care of himself.

And then

the heel turns the tide in some kind of way and then takes advantage of it.

And you lay this big son of a bitch out and you get over.

And it's, you know, as Kevin Sullivan would say, it's not that hard.

hard.

But this is the way you do it, executing it properly is more difficult.

But the concept,

this is the way you get a guy over.

They

really, they went about a minute and a half to a break when the match started, and they were mostly having a

big man style match.

And

old Brown is very Vince McMahon-style WWE in that,

you know I think they've

when you only see him every once in a while it's better it's like Andre

but I think they've got pretty much all of the the personality they're gonna get out of him out of him haven't they

um

they certainly killed him dead here I mean I don't know what the

dead here well the comeback from here would be

after he's off TV for however long, if he comes back, if he wants to have another shot at him, they can beat him again.

He was just off tv well but he was hurt for real i think for a while there wasn't he so they immediately do an angle hurting him again to get him off yeah well because that the thing he's in the middle of nothing

he's with the roster they have right now you know he's big he's a big guy but is he necessary at this point

boom so you use him to get the guy that is necessary at this point over and then send him back and then you get an idea for brown later on and you bring him back and do something else maybe whatever the fuck but are they getting jacob fatu over like a jimmy snooker where

he became the heel that was cool to like to the point where when he turned everyone was ready for it and they wanted it already yes are they setting it up right now

well i don't know if they're doing it on purpose because they didn't really do that with jimmy snook on purpose but that is sometimes the effect and they will go with that when it's time but they don't need to rush rush it.

Because

the more that he beats people up in this exciting of a fashion, the more the people are going to like him anyway.

And you can hear already people chanting or people, whatever.

But based to tell the folks who didn't see this program what he did,

old Brown ran around the ring.

I use run in quotation marks.

Remember a couple months ago, he ran around the ring and ran by the guy and the guy just took a bump on his own.

He didn't even touch the guy,

but he ran around the ring and tackled Jacob over the announced desk.

And then he tried again, but Jacob Samoan dropped him on the announce desk.

Did you see Jacob go over the desk?

Yes.

Like head over feet, like just like a rolling ball of fucking fire.

Well, yeah, your head usually over your feet.

But just, I mean, you don't really see people tumble like that over the table usually.

It was a hell of a bump.

Well, he's a hell of a man.

Okay, we're getting nowhere here, folks.

He's a hell of a man.

Big Jacob, big bad Jacob.

So anyway, but I think actually Braun needs to drop the choo choo run around the ring since Braun started doing it and he does it like a goddamn Maserati where Brown does it like a fucking pickup truck.

But then Jacob gave him six asses in the face.

Just boom, boom, boom, and over and over in the turnbuckle.

And finally, the referee gets in between, like no more.

So Jacob shit cans the referee and gives him two more asses in the face.

And the referee disqualifies it.

The fans were booing because they wanted more

ass in the face.

And that's the point: is that

we've lost the ability

to really get heat on

a really talented heel for beating up a kind of a

baby face.

They want to see this shit, and especially the Jacob stuff, the ass in the face and the moonsault.

And

so

Jacob threw the chair in.

He's going to kill him.

Here comes Aldous and security.

And Fatu breaks free and does the moonsault, gets a big pop.

And now Brown is bleeding from the mouth.

And he hits him with another moonsault and gets a big pop.

And then Tomatonga shows up to try to get Jacob out.

and the people are chanting fatu, fatu.

And he comes back in and does moonsault number three.

And finally, he leaves and Brown is coughing up blood and everybody's fucking Verklimped.

And the people, that's it's excitement.

He's chaos.

This is the kind of shit that gets somebody over.

So

I thought this was very well done, even with our friend Mr.

Strongman involved.

You know, this was really well done, and the blood from the mouth was something you usually don't see to that level on broadcast TV for WWE, but let alone on Monday night or anything.

And seeingly, he didn't spit the whole rubber out.

And not having Solo there is helping Jacob and also Tama get over their personalities a whole lot more.

I think Tama, or Tommy Tonga,

as they call him, I think that he's better off without Tongaloa and Jacob has more room to get over without Solo.

And then this,

we said, what are they going to do?

You know, with Solo, with the whole secondary bloodline, blah, blah, blah, after

that kind of got blown off,

is maybe Solo going to come back more contrite and Jacob says, fuck you, I'm taking over.

We got Jacob and Solo.

Who knows?

They got a million ways to go.

We got a long way to go.

No, we don't.

We got a short time to get there.

No, we don't.

I think we're at the end or close to the end.

No, we're close to the end.

Arn and Tully were at ringside.

The Brainbusters.

They were the Brain Busters for 12 months.

But

was it McAfee

did mention the four horsemen, I think.

One of them mentioned the four horsemen.

However, the Brainbusters were on multiple Saturday night's main events.

Well, yes, I in 1989.

And it was non-stop great matches.

Them and the Rockers, them and Demolition.

Thank you, Randy McNally.

That was great stuff.

That was great.

They didn't bring up the Tully.

I mean, more than Saturday Night's main event.

I mean, I guess it's WWE, they wouldn't bring it up.

Long history with San Antonio and Southwest.

Well, they already had Sean Michaels there.

I wonder if, how Sean and Tully get along,

both being San Antonio boys.

And at some point very early, Sean Michaels worked for Tully's father.

Tully was already gone by the time Michaels broke in, though.

He was already in the Carolinas.

All right.

Now we're at the main event.

Jay Uso versus Gunther for the world title.

And

I was disappointed in this, but not because of the

necessarily anybody's performance.

I love Gunther, but

I wanted to see if Gunther could get somewhat of a better match than most people can out of Jay with the hot dogging and the timing issues and everything.

But they started this thing with 14 minutes left on the air, went to a break in a minute, came back, did another few minutes, went to another break,

and they had the finish in by the time.

So, you didn't see a lot of this fucking match.

But

Gunther is impeccable, as always.

Jay was better here than sometimes, but I between

I'm sorry, it's just something I can't unsee because it's something that I would mention if this was wrestling school.

Not only the punches that Jay does,

and I'm not just talking about the slappy open hand, anything.

Some of these guys need to work on their fucking strikes, even if they're on national television.

And the timing when he's hot dogging where the heel has to stand there weebling and wobbling with the chin out.

It's getting to the point where

it's worse than Dusty giving the triple fucking elbows to Tully Arn and Flair.

Am I being too harsh on this?

It's just something that I cannot see.

I noticed it here, and the fans are really into it, So give them that.

Oh, he's over and he's drawing money and he's selling merchandise.

I'm just talking about the quality of the performance.

Jacob Fatu just did all those ass shots to Braun Strowman in the corner.

And they look good and it produced something.

Jey Uso did it in this match to Gunther

and missed it.

It wasn't even near him.

And then they're like, oh, it's a tribute to his father, Rikishi.

Yeah, because Rikishi was a big guy with a big ass.

So, I mean, even that, I watched that and he missed the, it was just, it looked bad.

The work.

Ever since you pointed it out, it's all I could see.

Oh, no, it's my fault.

You ruined Jey Uso.

Well,

no.

Jey Uso ruined Jey Uso.

Or did Yeet ruin Jey Uso?

I'm not sure.

Well, he got some Yeet chance.

Gunther stayed in control.

And let Jay fight from underneath and have hope spots.

And when Gunther was in control, the timing is better.

Then Jay finally makes comeback.

Spear, big pop gets a two-count.

Kick, spear, splash off the top, two count, big pop gets the yeet chance.

And then

he went for the third spear, and Gunther bent over and picked him up and power bombed him.

And then jerked him up and powerbombed him again.

One, two, three.

And

I got to be honest with you,

they are not scared to beat

just about anybody in this company now because everybody is so over, so strong

that, you know, you would think in another lifetime,

because Jay is over, he's selling merchandise, people love the entrance,

the whole nine yards, his work is not the best.

You didn't sometimes you didn't want to beat the guy who couldn't work particularly well when he was over because he couldn't work well enough to get back over if it hurt him.

But in this case, boom, because Gunther, they believe in, obviously, and that's a great sign

that,

boom, he just powerbombed main event Jey Uso.

One, two, three.

But

I don't think it hurt Jay.

Because Gunther's, everybody's over.

And I mean, it's almost fucking ridiculous at this point.

Yeah, plus, let's be very honest.

The Bloodline family feud storyline is one thing.

This is Jay's limit, probably.

I don't see him as being a guy to win the world title, so this is kind of the height of where he can go.

Now you got to find someone right below that he could feud with or do something with or just make it non-stop bloodline with him and everyone else again.

Or then is there is there still mileage in Jimmy and Jay at some point teaming back up again against Solo and Fatu?

There's definitely something in them teaming up.

The question is, where do you get the most value?

Who do they team up against?

Well, but I'm thinking if you had the Usos against Solo and Fatu, but then at some point,

Solo and Fatu could have the split as a result of that.

Because if they did the Usos against the Tongas, that could be one of the worst matches in the history of wrestling.

Oh, yeah.

No, we don't.

Jacob's got to be in there somewhere.

Don't put Tongaloa and Jay Uso in the same ring.

That may be a matter, anti-matter fucking thing.

I miss Tongaloa.

It got to the point where once it was brought up that he makes all these weird errors, I started watching, and then it just kept happening.

Like weird things where he would go to the wrong place, or he ran the guy into the corner and he missed the corner.

Just stuff you've never seen before.

Well, now we know poor Bronson Reed is going to be on the shelf for a while with that injury.

But what are the other, Jimmy or Jay?

One or the other broke their foot.

Oh, Jimmy.

Jimmy, Jimmy, he's back.

Fucking Tongaloa broke his toe.

And he's, oh, he's, Tongaloa also was out with a broken toe, and we haven't seen it.

Like, he's on an iron lung.

We haven't seen him since.

He's day-to-day.

It could get, depending on the...

On the quality of the matches that they're having without him, it gets better, he gets worse.

It just depends.

Well, that was Saturday Night's Main Event.

Overall thoughts on the show.

This is the second one of the rejuvenated Saturday Night's Main Event.

A retro feel, the retro ropes.

I like the ring microphone coming down, and it's almost like a faux MSG kind of look, which Saturday Night's Main Event never really had, actually.

But what do you think of this?

Well, but it's retro.

I like that aisle way.

I'm telling you, they're going to go at some of these.

They're going to go somewhere where some drunk guy is going to try to punch somebody.

And then they're going to feel like the heels used to in the old days every night of the week.

I like that narrow aisle there.

You can tell they're looking.

They're like, is somebody going to throw something in my face?

It's bound to make you nervous when you haven't experienced that.

But overall,

I thought this was a good show.

It didn't last too long.

There were main event matches.

There's stars on the program, and they've got a ton more

that they didn't even have to put on here.

And we got the Royal Rumble coming up in several days now.

Have they announced like everything that's on the show?

I don't think we need to know anymore, do we?

You got all these fucking guys in the Royal Rumble that want to kill each other, and you got Cody and

Owens in the ladder match, and

you have the women's rumble.

Joy.

Ten wrestlers so far have announced themselves for the men's Royal Rumble, seven women.

We're the week of the Royal Rumble here, and then there's two other matches announced.

Two out of three falls, Gargano and Ciampa versus Motor City Machine Guns.

Oh, boy.

And they had to announce that one.

And ladder match, Cody versus Kevin.

I must admit, I would love to see the Motor City Machine Guns and Tommaso Ciampa, but Jesus Christ, can we

freeze Gargano in amber or something?

He's the last of a dying breed, the last of the guys who like worship Shawn Michaels' style of just super kicks and shit.

But that wasn't Michaels' style.

That's just what they imitated from him.

That's right.

And they're not even Michaels' size.

Michaels was a fucking giant next to somebody.

Michaels is six feet tall, even though he wasn't particularly heavy in the body weight.

Anyway, but it was a good show.

It's on NBC Network Television a week before a fucking pay-per-view slash premium live event in a stadium with 50-something thousand people in it.

Yeah, they're on a roll.

They're doing pretty good, headed to the elimination chamber in WrestleMania.

They'll make $500 million in the next two months.

Well, that'll be in the next two months.

And of course, we still have a more show to go.

And we also have the Royal Rumble next week.

So we will now go back.

What is your show?

Do you want to go back?

Well, let's go back to the to the

go back ahead.

Yeah,

we're going to try that.

Let's see if we can go back ahead.

Let's see if this works.

All right, we've returned from where we began.

We are here again.

We have arrived.

We are here.

And he is here.

And folks, once again, if you would ignore the wood shipper that is stationed across the road from me at another property, I think this is a cover-up thing.

She's getting rid of her ex-husband.

That lady,

she's a great housekeeper.

She's been married three times, kept the house every time.

But anyway, I'll tell you, Brian, before we go any further, I had to, during our break, I had to take me a shot.

I had to take me a shot because, you know, I was shaking.

My hands were trembling.

I had to jimmy legs.

My nerves were on end.

I had to calm myself down because, you know, I went to the doctor and everything was perfect.

But he said,

your blood sugar, you got to cut down on the Reese cups and the cake with the double icing.

And I said, but doctor, doctor, can't you see I'm hurting, hurting

for the, I'm on the sweet stuff.

I got the sugar monkey on my back.

And hell, no more.

So now what I'm doing is I'm substituting the delicious

protein-packed 30-gram protein shakes from organ

for chocolate milkshakes and ice cream and such and such of that nature, because it tastes so confusingly similar while at the same time being so much better for you.

And that's helping me.

Sometimes I start to get the shakes, Brian.

And all I do is I just pop the top on one of these.

30 gram protein shakes from Organe, the chocolate milkshake kind that taste oh, so good.

And then I'm just avoiding all that sugar that I was getting before while I'm packing on the protein.

You ought to see my abs.

Well, my abs,

I don't even have a six-pack now.

I've got an eight-pack.

I'm working on a 10-pack.

I'm not sure actually if I'm supposed to have this many muscles in my stomach.

Well, forget about the muscles and how many, but let's talk about the drinks.

And of course, there's a case.

You can get cases of them with many, many, many.

Yes, there are many, many different bottles of it in there.

You can get as many as you want.

They will sell them to you over at organe.com.

That's O-R-G-A-I-N.

And they got protein powders to bars to shakes.

They've got products that the whole family will love.

I don't know what kind of marinades they have for Valentine's Day.

Come on.

You can check in there as well.

But in terms of nutrition, in terms of protein, in terms of making sure you get the right things in you, I have one every day.

I love my organe.

Well, I think you ought to have 12 or 14 because that way, you know, I used to eat about a gallon, gallon and a half of ice cream a day.

A day?

Well, you know, I just take the thing and a spoon and go to town, but now I just substitute these delicious protein-packed real nutrition

without any added sugar protein shakes, that type of descriptive thing.

And they're an excellent source, Brian.

Did you know this of premium ultra-filtered protein with all nine essential amino acids?

So there you go.

Well, there you go.

And we can also would you like to know how to get them?

Yeah, that's a great idea.

Well, if you want more protein in your life, folks, that you can have and hug and hold for your very own,

go to organe.com/slash jim

and use the code Jim Jim for 30%

off your order.

Organe.com slash Jim.

Use the code Jim, save 30%

and

have a wonderful life free of the sugar monkey on your back.

What speaker?

Go ahead.

What were you going to do?

I was going to say Organe.

Just Organe.

Organe.

One more time, promo code.

Jim.

Jim.

My first name with three letters.

It's easy to spell and pronounce.

And what I was going to ask is, what are the monkeys over at the Arcadian Vanguard Network doing this week?

Are they flinging poo at anyone?

No, no, it's great programming, as always, for free.

Of course, every day, the Arcadian Vanguard Podcast Network get information about all the shows on Twitter at Super Podcasts or on Facebook.

Facebook.com slash Arcadian Vanguard.

Each and every day, get the wrestling news for free.

From the wrestling news at thewrestlingnews.com, wherever you find your favorite podcast, no clickbait, no paywall, just the wrestling news.

No matter where it is out there, if it's news, you'll hear it on the wrestling news.

Want to make mention?

No matter where it is, if it's news, it'll be there.

Want to make mention of shut up and wrestle with Brian Solomon, his upcoming guest, Brandon Thurston from WrestleNomics.

We talk so much about it.

Thurston Howell III is going to be, I didn't even...

really believe he was real.

Well, we talk about his charts to hear what he actually sounds like and hear this interview with Brian Solomon, SUAWPOD.com.

Oh, for sure.

Would it kill his whole gimmick if he sounded like Ernest T.

Bass?

If he could write and come up with all these numbers and keep track of this complicated mathematics, so, but just

verbally, he was a fucking moron.

Well, we'll see what happens.

Once again, SUAWPod.com, wherever you find your favorite podcast, shut up and wrestle with Brian Solomon.

And of course, the 605 Super Podcast, the

membership.

Go through the archive, 605pod.com, available wherever you find your favorite podcast, The Mothership.

Well, now it's time we talk about Netflix's hottest new programming

simsation.

Sensation Monday Night Raw,

January 27th in Atlanta, Georgia.

Sold out 12,432 people.

They did the drone shot.

My God, they're going to have to start building bigger arenas.

What the fuck?

Is this starting to be a rib now?

And

one of the walk-ins, did you see, since it was Atlanta, there was Cody and Brandy and their

daughter, whose name I can't remember, but it was a family walk-in amongst all the stars walking in.

And

again, Jesus age Christ.

This thing has,

this is before the Rumble, much less before WrestleMania.

Are they going to have to do what they did in the old days and just build some wooden stadiums to get all the people in?

Are you talking to me on mute?

No, I mean, we have big stadiums.

I don't know what to say.

We have big stadiums.

I think they'll get everyone in.

The drone shot is.

Crazy.

I'd love to see footage of them doing it because it's flying so fast around.

You almost think it's being sped up.

But then you're like, oh, no, there's Michael Cole slowly walking to his position.

What if it hits some fucker in the head?

Bam!

They need a drone shot of the drone.

And they follow the drone around with the camera so you see the drone making the shot of it, and then the drone flies into somebody's head.

It must be tempting to take it down.

Well, I don't guess they let people come into the building with fucking nets or

grappling.

If you threw a t-shirt over it, would that screw it up?

I don't think it gets low enough.

You can throw a fucking piece of cloth up to derail its goddamn flight pattern.

Do you?

That would be, is that against the FAA regulations?

You got to fly whatever 20 feet over people's heads.

I don't know.

Ask them about their drones.

I'm not sure about the FAA.

Well, we're droning on now.

The first segment, and

it was long.

It was good.

It was over, but it was a little long.

But Seth Franklin Rollins, lots of singing, Liberace's pajamas.

He's a little screechy and cackly again.

But he was out there.

It's almost WrestleMania season, and it kicks off when he wins the Royal Rumble.

We're plugging the Rumble to death tonight.

And again,

when he started talking about his loss on Raw, the fans started chanting CM Punk without Rollins mentioning Punk's name.

And

he mentioned all the baby faces he was going to toss out of this fucking Royal Rumble

and especially Roman Reigns.

And Punk is going to be the last

so that I can crush his WrestleMania dream.

And then he's just, you know, which

world title should I go after?

Gunther sounds good, but then there's Cody.

And wouldn't it be poetic if I took the title this year that I helped him to win last year?

So he's doing the fan poll thing where he says, should I fight Cody or should I fight Gunther?

But before they get the

Gunther answer, Gunther's music hits and out he comes.

And

I love Gunther's nerdy promos and his matter-of-fact delivery, and he's got some confidence now, doesn't he?

You can tell that he knows he's got a handle on this thing.

But anyway, his story is basically,

you know,

I beat Jey Uso's ass.

He starts knocking Rollins.

You're not the best anymore.

I am.

The belt proves it.

Please win the Royal Rumble and challenge me.

And then music plays, and here comes Logan Paul.

We forgot about this dickhead.

And now they're booing him so loud that you can't really hear what he's and the guys in the ring are making fun of it.

We can't hear you because they're booing.

And his story is that WWE needs a new face for the Netflix era and these two Nimrods ain't it.

And they're chanting, you suck, you suck.

And Logan Paul declares for the Royal Rumble.

And Gunther, when Gunther says, I hope you do win so that I can kick your ass.

And the people cheer Gunther.

So now

they're siding with the devil and

anybody else against Logan Paul.

And they all just sniped at each other and left.

But again, this is all they have to do is these guys just walk out to the ring and talk snidely to each other.

And a sellout crowd is fucking going ballistic.

Are they handing out nitrous canisters at the front door?

I mean, you said it went long.

It didn't bother me how long it went until like, I mean, it kind of bothered me that it went nowhere, like nothing happened, really.

Yeah, yeah, at the end of it, you're like, well, there's a long way to go to get here.

But the interaction, I mean, that's the thing because here in this case, we have guys that really generally don't interact with each other.

So it's that first time, and it's never like that first time ever again.

No, but it's the first time they've interacted.

So, you know, you don't know where it's going to go.

When Gunther gets cheered, going after Logan Paul, it's an interesting little thing.

So I like this.

Again, it went nowhere other than they all want to be in the Royal Rumble, I guess.

Well, not Gunther,

but Logan Paul and Seth Royal.

Well, yeah, but they're building multiple matchups with multiple issues for multiple people that are offended by other multiple people, and they all happen to be stars.

And

again, in some cases, you know, like Logan Paul, I don't think is going to be the babyface against anybody in this cast of Mary Misfits, but Gunther, because the fans respect him, he's He's not that,

he's an asshole, egotistical, aloof, and they like that about him.

But the Logan Paul is an asshole that they don't like that about him, if that makes any sense.

Yeah.

Anywho,

again, long program skipping over a few of the things.

In the middle and all of the various rappers that were introduced at Ringside, including Little Yachty,

Two Chains, and Quaso.

Thankfully, they were, I don't know how the music industry was holding down the fort with these fucking monoliths of the recorded music art

out of commission at a wrestling match.

J.D.

McDonough.

Get well soon, J.D.

We've had fun at your expense, but goddamn, you're a good kid.

And what the fuck?

If anybody hasn't heard, the match was J.D.

McDonough and Dominic Mysterio for the tag team title against the War Raiders.

And let me say this before

JD's near-fatal injury takes up all the time.

The War Raiders are doing a great job with the new gimmick.

These fucking cartoon goddamn Vikings that had been going nowhere, now they've revamped them.

Hopefully, after, you know, they're drawing so many more new people.

Maybe people didn't see that or they'll forget quickly.

Go back and watch this match again after you find out about the injury.

And between Dominic just looking exhausted and knowing how badly jd was hurt these guys look like killers in there go back and watch it again now yes and and but anyway war raiders doing great

thankfully you came back from norway

and

you know the the

the problem was

early on jd did the moonsalt to the floor where he jumps up, springs off the rope, and

you know, moonsalts moonsaults the guy.

Acai moonsault.

Acai moonsault.

Thank you.

Thank you, Excalibur.

Oh, I can't do that to you.

I apologize.

I say you become the ultimate dragon.

The ultimate dragon.

But anyway, JD does the moonsault on one of the fellows, and he

landed on the way that you land on the guy so he could break the fall, but he kept spinning backwards, and the back of his head and his upper back and

middle back

hit the announce desk at a

frightening rate of speed.

And boom, and he bounced off onto the floor instantly.

And Michael Cole shit himself.

And he basically came out on commentary and said, Somebody check on J.D.

McDonough, and I'm not kidding.

He probably thought he was dead because I can't imagine sitting two feet in front of that.

And the camera didn't even catch it really the first first time, but they did a replay.

And,

you know,

I hate to chastise this guy that's just injured himself, but a general chastization.

Guys, as in people in the wrestling business, what are we fucking thinking?

Now that everybody does this shit.

And you keep raising the bar and I got to jump higher, got to jump farther, or just doing the same thing that everybody else does.

Somebody's going to get killed.

J.D.

McDonough would have died on live television if he had been six inches shorter of where he landed

because

the injuries that he's gotten, apparently,

are broken, two broken ribs and a punctured lung.

And the reason for that is if you go back

and look at this in

any kind of slow motion or just with a careful eye,

the back of his head hit that little

fucking spoiler or a little hood thing on the top of the desk, which is there's an element of give in that, and it's detachable from the desk.

What hit the corner of the desk was the area in between his shoulder blades and his middle back,

which is what apparently broke the ribs and punctured the lung, but saved his life.

Because if the back of his head had come down at that momentum

six inches short of where it landed, it would have been his head on the corner of the goddamn desk.

And it would have fucking given him fatal brain damage, wouldn't it?

I mean, I'm not as good.

I'm not coming down fast.

And again, the trajectory, just the angle he was at.

You know, because part of me, when I first watched the replay and they showed it in slow motion, I was like, where's

Ivan?

Is it Ivar?

Ivar.

Ivar.

Ivar.

Or was it even Ivar?

It matters not.

The war guy.

Where is Mr.

War?

Could he have caught him?

Could he have stopped this?

Because he went right over him.

Well, but because of the way when you're moonsaulting on a guy that's standing up on the floor, you're going to land with your midsection kind of on his shoulders and it breaks the fall and you still spin off.

But that's what I'm saying.

They're doing these things that everybody's doing and it's not even unique or, you know, remarkable anymore.

And this guy could have fucking died.

And he finished the match.

He did greatness match, yeah.

He finished it.

He took a big backdrop.

He kept working.

He looked facially like he didn't know whether to wind his ass or scratch his watch when he got back in the ring, but he finished the fucking thing.

Yeah, well, that's the other thing we didn't say.

That Asay Munso, the other issue was it happened at the beginning of the match.

Yes.

It was early early on in the match.

Like two minutes in or whatever, but he got through the whole rest of the thing, taking bumps on a broken ribs, punctured lung, just the, you know,

and you could see his back welting up as it was going along, but

he was completely blind.

You can't, he was going so fast and backwards he couldn't see.

If he'd turned his head, that'd have been worse.

So you're, you're, no, that's too out of control.

And that's,

I'm sorry, but that's the one thing that I heard from every

great name that I ever shared a locker room with, the subject ever came up when I first got into business was

you always need to be in control of yourself or where you're going unless

you're trusting somebody to put you somewhere specifically.

But there's always needs to be an element of control.

You can't just fucking

fuck it.

I'm just going to fucking fly and see what happens.

That's crazy.

Catch me.

Catch me.

Watch out for that tree.

You know, beyond the injury, and again, I didn't know how badly he was hurt.

I figured he was at least, because there was also a spot in the match where he took a knee to the back of the head.

So I thought he's probably at least shaken up.

Then you find out he's hurt.

I watched it again.

It was a really good match.

It was actually a really good match.

And they got the fans really into it.

And they got this is awesome chance going by the end of the thing with a guy with fucking various serious medical conditions.

And then the War Raiders hit the finish on Dominic.

So they're using the War Raiders in a serious capacity now.

But at the same time, they can always beat Dominic because the people don't care.

He's that kind of heel.

Some kinds of heel you can beat once and

send him to the glue factory.

Other you can beat every fucking night.

Hey, one last thing on this before we move on.

In terms of jd mcdonough's injury and the fact that he got injured that badly early in the match and you could tell he was hurt and he continued and he didn't

he didn't anything up he wasn't out of place

i mean it's incredible what does that tell you about a guy does that impress you as a booker as a promoter the fact that a guy goes out there and you know he got badly hurt and he did everything he was supposed to do

Yes, I mean,

I may have chastised him when I found out exactly what was wrong with him for like, you know, the father-son, dumb fuck.

We don't, it wasn't that important.

You risk whatever.

But,

you know, he was dedicated and fucking determined.

And the fact that he could gut through it.

And, you know, we've all,

goddamn, I had to get out of the ring, you know, when I dropped off the scaffold, even though Bubba had to help me.

But you try to get through whatever you've got to get through, especially when it's on live television or it's a big house or whatever, and adrenaline helps.

But,

you know, that was, he didn't have to take all those fucking bumps after he punctured his lung.

I think nobody would have cussed him for taking the backdrop out of it.

That's the other thing.

They certainly didn't go any lighter on him.

I didn't see why.

No, well, I don't think he wasn't diagnosed right there, you know, in mid-match.

They probably thought, oh, fuck, he probably got his bell rung.

Are you okay?

You can move around.

They thought he was concussed, I'm sure.

They didn't think that he had had broken bones and things.

Well, he'll be out for a while, but definitely get well soon, J.D.

McDonough.

But, you know, when you land with the back of your head from 15 feet in the air, traveling at a high rate of speed with a spin on it,

and it meets a wooden surface, you hear all kinds of things in your fucking head.

All kinds of bells and whistles and sparkly things and fireworks.

That's not the kind of things you want to hear in your ears, is it, Brian?

No, I mean, that's a bad sign, especially after you hit your head.

If you hear fireworks and all sorts of other things that you name.

Yes, dog whistles.

You

hear everything.

Yeah.

Fireworks.

That's well, no, you want to control what you hear in your own head.

Ladies and gentlemen, that's why if, you know, as a matter of fact, if J.D.

McDonna had had the Raycon everyday wireless earbuds in his ears, I bet you that that whole thing wouldn't have happened because he would have been too busy grooving out to the latest tunes to even worry about jumping up and doing that I'm sorry moonsault.

So the whole thing could have been avoided.

Everybody would be in a better mood, Brian, if they were listening to cool tunes and soothing music and provocative conversation on the Raycon everyday wireless earbuds instead of just hearing what's going on in the world today.

Because nobody wants to hear what's going on in the world today.

So you need to program this shit.

The Raycons, they got the quick charge function.

Charge them for 10 minutes.

You can listen to them for 90 minutes.

And that ain't that's that's nine times the investment you put into it.

They got a 32-hour battery life overall.

The multi-point connectivity that lets you deviance out there, pair up with two devices at the same time and just let your freak fry flag fly.

And the freak fry flag?

What is that?

Freak frag fly.

Where do you buy those?

Well, when you pair up with two devices at the same time, you're just, you're like Caligula.

And the active noise cancellation, earligula.

See, there you go.

You're having that aural intercourse.

Active noise cancellation.

is difficult to find at an accessible price point.

That means if you're cheap, normally you don't have it, but Raycon, they got it because they started just half the price as the other premium audio brands.

And they have, of course, as you know, the array of vibrant colors.

As a matter of fact, if you get like all the colors and you spread them out on the desk, it looks like a big bowl of Cheerios.

But don't put milk over these because you'll break a crown.

The Cheerios don't have color.

What are you talking about?

The Cheerio.

Oh, the fruit loops is what I'm talking about.

I'm sorry, not the Cheerio, but the round, the things that have all the colors of the toucan.

Are you colorblind?

In the rainbow.

Okay.

Yeah.

Well, no, those are the fruit loops are the ones that are colored, right?

That's right.

Maybe I'm just a fruit loop.

Anyway, folks, don't stick fruit loops in your ears.

You can't hear anything except crunch, crunch, crunch.

And sooner or later, that shit will get stuck.

So stick the Raycon everyday wireless earbuds in your ear in a variety of vibrant colors.

Hey, fuck with people.

As you're walking down the street, have a red one in one side and a green one in the other side.

They'll think you're Santa Claus.

And if you don't fall in love with your Raycons, they offer a 30-day happiness guarantee return policy.

So that means if you just, if you want to be happy, all you got to do is return a pair of everyday wireless earbuds, your happiness is guaranteed.

Go right now, folks, to buy Raycon.

That's B-U-Y-R-A-Y-C-O-N by Raycon.com slash JCE.

You're going to get 20%, 20%,

up to 20% off site-wide.

Anything on the website, up to 20% off.

Headphones, too, by the way.

They don't just have the earbuds, they got the headphones.

Buyraycon.com slash JCE.

What an amazing discount,

all in terms of making people happy.

That's right.

Our good friends at Raycon.

Contact them for your ear needs today.

Yes, all your ears need

care and maintenance, and it'll cover up the ringing in your ears, JD.

Maybe we could arrange with our friends at Raycon to send JD a free pair.

Well, once again, get well, JD, but back to Raw.

Well, then we had Rey Mysterio with the Lucha Faces against Xavier Woods with Kofi Kingston.

And I mentioned this not because I watched the match, but because

they had seats set out in the front row with reserve signs on them,

supposedly for Xavier Woods' family, because he's from Atlanta, right?

But they were empty.

So they have their match, and finally the family arrives.

And the fucking finish is that when he goes over and says, Where were y'all?

They take their jackets off, and they all had new day suck shirts on.

And that Verklimpted

Xavier enough that Rey Mysterio hits 619 and beat him 123.

And then he celebrated with Xavier Woods' family.

See, I'd be upset, too.

It's not just that your family turned on you, but they planned out clearly, hey, let's dramatically all unzip at the same time.

Yeah.

And spent money on the other guy's merchandise.

Terrible betrayal.

It's been an interesting heel term.

So far, we've seen both of their families turn on them.

Life events.

We'll see what happens next.

Sami Zayn explained to Seth that, you know, kicking you last week, it was an accident.

And Seth, yeah, one time that was an accident.

And then

Jay Uso cut a promo.

He's going to win the Royal Rumble.

He came out with another local rapper with a mark belt, and there was much yeeting and waving going on.

And

this time, Jay was so blown up that he stood on the announce desk to do the promo, but he could only speak four words at a time.

He'd like, take a breath, spit out four words, take another breath, spit out four words.

But he's making it work with the yeeting in the promo style.

Liv Morgan and Rochelle Rochelle wrestled Naomi and Bianca, which went forever while I was fast-forwarding with no on-screen fast forward.

So I don't really know what happened there.

Did you know that Kai Sennett

will be at the Royal Rumble?

He's not a rapper.

He's a streamer.

Is he related to Max Sennett?

It's spelled differently.

Oh.

But so now, aren't we?

We're streamers, right?

Aren't you?

You're streaming if you're either

disseminating something on the internet or emptying your bladder, right?

You're streaming.

That's right.

So he got on the Royal Rumble just because he's a streamer.

Because WWE is paying influencers.

And there's nothing wrong with this.

It's smart.

They're paying influencers to boost their product to people that normally wouldn't give a shit about their product.

I hate the term influencer.

Well, that's what they call it on their books.

Well, you know,

was Rex Reed an influencer of movies?

Or was he a movie critic?

By God.

Well, these aren't critics.

Well, if he's streaming, he's probably criticizing something.

Elsewhere, why are you listening to him?

Are you listening to him?

I don't know what I'm listening to.

Do you know who the fuck this guy is?

I don't know.

All right,

so Paul Heyman was in the ring,

and he revealed the cover of the WWE 2K25 video game, and the pyro blew off, and a big banner dropped.

And it's Roman Reigns with Paul looking up at him adoringly at ringside.

And for the rest of this segment, all the people across from hard camera are like, motherfucker, we can't see what's going on.

This goddamn banner's in our way.

And then Paul cuts the promo.

He's the one behind the one in 29 versus one.

And it's going to be Roman versus everybody because Roman Reigns is coming back for his title.

And

that got a mixed response because the people,

they don't want to see.

They would want to see it, but they don't want to see Paul and/or and Roman turn on Cody because they like liking all of them.

Have you noticed this?

The reaction whenever Paul steps across the line and mentions that Roman might be coming after Cody, it's like Rumble Rumble.

Yeah, I also don't know how many people are just over the idea Roman has to be the champion to be in the position he's in when he's never around.

Well, but that's not,

I agree with you in theory there, but that's not leading to these reactions because now they have

they have fine-tuned this thing to where guys that people like

can get away with saying snotty shit about other guys that they like, even though the people will kind of, oh, don't say that about him.

I want to like all of y'all.

But then they go back and okay, we're with you again.

This is very fucking good.

And anyway, when Paul said he did a strong promo, as always, about everybody praying they're going to beat Roman Reigns and Drew McIntyre's music plays.

And here comes Drew.

And Paul was nervous, and they took their sweet time getting to the ring and getting to this.

This is where I miss the on-screen fast forward on Netflix when it's a five-minute fucking entrance, right?

Fans are chanting, We Want Roman, and Drew's like, Paul, don't be nervous.

We never get to talk.

And

Drew, of course, tells Paul that he's responsible for all of the success that paul's had he's the daddy of the bloodline

and it they drew the history back to 2020 drew won the royal rumble and then beat roman right that's almost prehistoric now

but that's where drew says paul you got in his ear then when he was down and you created this and the bloodline took over all i want is a thank you

and paul's like well thank you you, Drew, but you're crowding me right now.

Oh, I'm sorry.

I just need a favor.

I need you to do me a favor.

Please tell your boy that Drew McIntyre is going to eliminate him.

And Paul says, I promise you that I will pass the message on to Roman Reigns.

Oh, no, no, no.

Drew stops him.

He says, I was talking about punk.

And then he lets Paul leave.

So we're still being reminded about that, that punk, as a favor to Paul, did the blah, blah, blah, and it all works.

And then we got Sammy and Drew in our main event.

And

it was a good match.

It was fairly lengthy, but it was a good match.

These guys are pros.

They can work.

Idle observation, Vince vince mcmahon may have been right about logos on the mat

it does look a little

you know fucking looks like the the trailer that's hauling a race car to some stock car fucking track in georgia

but finally sammy went for a kick and drew schoolboyed him and put his feet on the ropes one two three the heel cheated and beat the baby face

Imagine that.

And then he leveled Sami Zayn and got some more heat on him.

And here Cody's music played.

Here came Cody.

And Cody and Drew get in a fight.

And Drew rolled out.

And right as Drew rolled out, Owens was in behind Cody and attacked him.

And they get in a fight.

And then Drew comes back to help stop Cody.

And Drew took Cody over to the corner where he was starting to throttle him, but Sammy came to save him with a kick.

And Drew moved, and Sammy kicked Cody right in the fucking face.

Boom.

Boy, a lot of misfires from Sammy.

And Sammy was shocked.

And Drew starts laughing and rolls out.

And Owens walks up beside Sammy because they're old buddies and patted him on the chest.

Thanks, pal.

And rolled out of the ring.

And Sammy's there with his head in his hands.

And Cody's down selling his face.

And they go off the air, or so we thought for a moment.

But first, Brian, your comments on

Drew and Sami Zayn.

Match was okay.

The finish was interesting.

And again, the teasing of multiple things, including Owens and Zane,

I thought it was good.

But then

that was the main event, right?

And you smartened me up to this.

Thank God we spoke before we, you know, recorded

because that was the main event.

It was all over.

The announcers didn't say, well, stay tuned.

We've got some more shit going to happen.

And they faded to black and then to a what I assumed, and I later found out what you assumed was a promotional piece for some more.

It was, I thought I'd seen that footage with Roman in Saudi Arabia or wherever the fuck they were.

I thought, is this a documentary plug or whatever?

Boom.

I stopped the

playing of the show, and so did you.

And then later on, you found out and alerted me.

Well, no, I didn't.

What happened?

What happened was on Xfinity, the cable remote, you could just say CBS, it'll go to CBS.

Me TV, it'll go to me TV, whatever it may be.

So I said to go to the next channel and it didn't happen.

And then I realized, oh, I'm on Peacock.

It's a different, or on Netflix, it's a different input.

I got to go to the other one for cable.

And right as I did that, they went back to the ring.

And I said, whoa, what's this?

Okay, well, now, by the way, you've just illustrated why I hate all this fucking streaming bullshit.

Just give me a cable box because you got to say this and do that and jump this hoop and go back to this thing.

But nevertheless, they came back after the

couple minutes of commercial broadcasting.

They came back to the ring and Cody was still down selling his face and then got up and kind of

giving the

you know, the speech like he's going to wind things up and out comes CM Punk.

And then they proceeded to do one of the goddamnest promo exchanges.

I mean, we've come to

expect, you know,

high-level shit verbally from Punk.

And Cody has held his own in this position.

But holy shit, they told this story

and Punk led it.

But he needed to because he was the, you know, the guy setting this thing up.

And

he built up a long time with Cody saying, hey,

I know what it's like.

I was there.

I was champion for 400 and something days.

I'm here.

I'm concerned about you.

I know what that world title can do to you.

I lost friends.

I see you losing friends.

He actually began the promo by saying, are you okay?

Yeah, are you okay?

You know, and he

said, you want to be Bruno or Cena, but none of us are Superman.

And that title wears down on you, and everybody's against you when you're the man.

There are no friends.

Because Cody said, You're my friend, right?

And Punk paused.

But he said, Yes, that's why I'm out here.

I'll always be your friend.

I promised your dad, but I love you.

But you're the man, there are no friends.

Well, Cody says, if you're

you were right in your prognosis last year, What's next for me?

And that's where Punk really laid it out.

Short term, you're in your own bed tonight.

You're in Atlanta.

But

maybe you don't sleep.

You're thinking about the biggest match of your career at Royal Rumble.

He puts that over.

Or then maybe you got an early call.

You're going out to do publicity.

Or if you make it through the Royal Rumble, what about Raw and SmackDown?

The time away from your family, the constant grind.

And while

those belts, I know how much it means to guys like me and you to be the champion, to have the title,

to do that grind on the road.

You know, it's going to keep you away from your family.

It's going to be a constant source.

And while you're trying to keep up with it, somebody's going to be out there that's going to be the next one to take it from you and to go into that and do that whole thing.

Because when you're the champion, there's always someone that's coming up that's going to take that that belt.

But that's the good news, Cody.

And Cody said, well, if that's the good news, what's the bad news?

And Punk says the bad news is the someone is me.

And then a few, oh.

And the people were with this, not even cheering and booing, but applauding the back and forth exchanges.

And Punk said, I'm going to win the Royal Rumble.

I'm going to see you at WrestleMania, and I'm not going to stab you in the back.

I'm going to stab you in the front.

Because I'm telling you this ahead of time.

I'm going to win that title, but I'm your friend, so I'm being honest.

And then Cody fired up and cut a promo, gave the street address of OVW,

4,400 Shepherdsville Road in Louisville, folks.

And he did a hell of a promo

about how he came to OVW a little bit behind punk, and he came to the main roster a little behind punk.

But then it's always been a situation through most of their career where he was chasing punk, but now

Cody told Punk, I'm not chasing you, you're chasing me.

And the people are like, Yay.

And then they both tried to walk off from each other, but they both caught each other one time for parting shots.

And Cody got the last one when he said he's going to make

the best in the world realize he's not the best in the world anymore.

This was the best thing on fucking Raw.

How many people missed it?

That's what I'm wondering because, you know, again, it was a hell of a fucking false finish to come back from.

You thought the show was over.

Or I did.

You did.

Maybe we were just anxious to get out of it, but

certainly they will excerpt it on other programming.

But

now there's another fucking match we want to see.

Holy jumping jehosophat.

And I thought we were supposed to be getting Cena and Punk.

Somebody said that, or am I misremembering that?

They've been teasing a lot of different things.

We'll see where they go.

We were going to get Cena and Cody.

I think they're going to have to have five nights of WrestleMania to work all these matches in.

But they have endless time

to do all of these things that they've set up because they're set up for the next two years.

But we don't have endless time, do we, Brian?

No.

No.

Well, in that case, then, folks, thank you for joining us.

We'll be back in just a few days on the drive-thru where we'll cover more.

chaos and then back next week with the big royal rumble episode episode of the Experience.

Tune in.

Don't miss it if you can.

Until then, for Brian, I'm Jim.

Thank you.

Fuck you.

Bye-bye, everybody.