Episode 509: Jim Reviews AEW Full Gear 2023

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Hello again, everybody, and welcome to a milestone episode of the Jim Cornet Experience because AEW reached two historic milestones this week.

A TV show that we suspect to file will lose the ratings war by a record percentage, and they put on a match that made me swear off watching wrestling.

We're going to laugh at Tony Khan and then thank him for that.

Here today on the program and joining me, Hawaiian Brian, the podcasting lion, the king of the Arcadian Vanguard Podcast Network, Mr.

Co-host of you, the no-good motherfucker that better not talk me out of this, the great Brian Last, everybody.

Aloha, Jim.

A pleasure to be here once again.

And it's sad that when you say there's a match that turned you off from watching wrestling, I think I have a very good idea of what it is, but hopefully we have other wrestling to talk about here today from that same event and.

Future events that we could talk about here on yeah yeah yeah

yeah it's you know it's sad you know what's sad that you only think you know which match that would make me swear off watching professional wrestling that you're not even exactly sure because there were several contenders but

you know

november 18th brian was a saturday and i had a wonderful saturday i had a wonderful day going i was up to hear the rooster crow and by the way that's literal because there's a rooster that lives in the backyard of the neighbor a couple doors down And they don't just crow at daylight.

They crow all fucking day.

But I was up early.

The Monroe brothers came over.

They're working in the yard.

The leaf people had done their work.

And now we

did all the detail stuff because the yard goof that I fired last year, old Landon, he still does the place on either side of me.

So he does a shitty job.

So I had to clean off the fence rows on their sides too.

So I send the Monroes over there with the blowers blowers and the rakes and they do me about a 10-foot strip on either side.

And we got a bunch of junk hauled away and our old refrigerator,

we got that loaded up for our friends from Versales came over and picked that up because the new appliances have come in.

More on that in a moment.

And I played out of the yard with Harley and just and Stace and I had a wonderful dinner.

And then I say, you know what?

I'm not going to ruin this day by having to try to sit there.

And I knew I couldn't stay awake through the whole thing because it goes for hours and hours and hours.

Of course, we're talking about the AEW pay-per-view,

fully loaded, geared up, and ready to go, whatever the fuck their name is.

I said,

I can't start this now.

I'll kill my day.

I'll get up early in the morning on Sunday and I'll try to suffer through this, and then we'll record this program.

And Brian, now I've realized that I don't want to ruin my Sunday either.

I am amazed at how anybody could present something like they presented on that

event.

and not be ashamed of themselves and not be scared they're going to get kicked off their television network with all the upheavals going on in the world of television and wrestling broadcasting.

And just to not apologize to everybody that's ever been an active participant in professional wrestling for dropping their pants, spreading their cheeks, and taking a big shit

on

everything that's ever gone on in the history of the wrestling business.

Because two dumb shits want want to go out there and jack themselves off

for 45 minutes

at the expense

of everybody else that's ever going to try to make money in the wrestling business ever again.

And

maybe I'm not going to be alone.

Why would you watch anything else ever

in wrestling after that?

Well, except for the WWE, who actually have stars that people don't even care whether they wrestle or not.

But I think Tony Khan has allowed himself to be bent over

and anally protruded up to his tonsils.

If he ever thinks he can get any

interest in any physical angle or move

or goddamn happening in his

indie little garbage company ever again.

They have gone full fucking garbage.

They might as well bring the bank-addicted drug robber in and make him the champion.

I know the plumber would second that thought, but we know that he needs a brain scan.

Was it the entirety of the match or was it the specific

scale?

You know what?

Hold on here one second.

Hold on here one second.

Let me get my notes.

Hold on here so that i can tear them up no no don't no no no well we're gonna this is no we're we are trashing the format i'm tony scor storm i've ripped up my script tony score tony sprit tony scorm that ripped up her script i don't see i like tony scorn

tony scorm

They've got me so frazzled, I can't form a cogent simile.

We were going to do a normal opening to the program and talk and everything.

And I was going to explain to you over the course of this that I don't ever want to watch wrestling again.

And I figure you being the fucking professionally dedicated person that you are, you might take issue with that.

I don't know because you saw the same thing.

You probably might just get mad at me because, hey, motherfucker, I had to watch this whole thing.

But what

I

turned it off.

I have seen the predominant part of AEW Full Gear from the Kia Forum.

They couldn't get a full-size American card, goddamn,

by the naming rights.

I've seen the predominant part of it.

I turned it off after the Swerve, Strickland, and Hangnail Page.

What would you call that?

It wasn't a match.

It wasn't a fight because they were obviously cooperating.

It wasn't a match because it wasn't an athletic contest or a struggle in any fashion.

It was a ridiculous,

I don't know, kung fu movie scene from the 70s with fucking props

where

the bad kung fu guy jumps up 25 feet in the air, does four fucking triple flips over frontwards and then goes to kick the hero.

stops time with his fucking

arm movements and then kicks the guy seven times in the face in one second, and they fly through a wall.

That's about how realistic it was.

So it wasn't a match, it wasn't a contest, it wasn't a fight because you could tell they were cooperating with each other to do stupid shit, silly shit, nonsense,

stuff that nobody could possibly live through, except it was as phony as a fucking football bat.

What have they wrapped themselves up in their video games to the point where they don't remember what is really legitimately possible for the human anatomy and what's a bunch of bullshit that's just killing any potential angle or injury or hospitalization deal or devastating finish that you could ever do again in wrestling for the saps that were sucker enough to have to sit through and watch this, including me?

I think it's all about cheap pops.

It's all about whatever you're going to get a reaction from in the room, and you got a lot of oohs and ahs.

I was just, my question was, did you make it through the match or did you stop at a certain point of the game?

No, I was transfixed at how not only stupid, we knew that Paige was, I believe.

A great man once said, an empty-headed dumb fuck who's never done anything in the business, but I didn't know he was completely mentally unstable.

I thought he was just a soft, whiny little bitch, but he's a goddamn idiot.

And Swerve,

who we've talked about having talent, I didn't realize that he was also a mental fucking incompetent.

And I didn't know that either one of them would be allowed to go out there and ruin Tony Khan's business without somebody at the direction of Tony fucking Khan.

sending the hook out there to get them out of that fucking ring.

Well, based on the fact you just ripped up these notes and you decided to talk about this, I don't know if we're going to review this match right now, but let me just ask you this, whether it's this match or anything else, I don't think it'll be something like Koda Abushi on a bike, but something like this match.

At what point is AW, AWA, at what point is AEW

going to have their cocaine spot?

You know what I mean?

The thing that they do that they think is okay, that they justify in their minds, that their partners go, you know, I may not want to do more business with you.

Haven't they just done it?

Haven't they just done it when?

remember i've told you the story before when

the sheik ran cincinnati

and

in the shei's territory cincinnati was the second biggest drawing town behind detroit it had been since barnett

who owned the territory in the 50s cincinnati was drawing 10, 12,000 people to the gardens, right?

And through the early 70s, it was huge.

But

we've talked about Sheik's territory.

they aged out, but also

all of the violence and the blood and the gaga.

Not only could you not follow it with the fans, but then they had problems with the TV stations.

And when

Jerry Jarrett went to Cincinnati to try to get TV in 1980, because the Sheik had been off TV there for two or three years, at least at that point,

except for he got his show on WLW, Channel 5, the strongest station in the market, in 1979 for a while in the summertime

at 1.30 at Friday night, Saturday morning.

And you couldn't promote Jesus Christ versus Satan in a fucking arm wrestling match in Cincinnati at 1.30 in the morning, right?

And he couldn't afford to run the gardens anymore.

The town had been

a big town for 20 years.

It was dead.

Jared tried to get TV, and he went to one of the stations, and they said the program director called him back and said, come here, I want to show you something.

And he pulled out a tape that he had in his office and stuck it in the machine.

And there was Sheikh's TV from a few years before that when he was hot shotting, trying to get the town back.

And it was him holding the snake up to the fucking job guy's head while he's hanging him over the ropes.

But in the other hand, the Sheik's cutting him with a blade.

And the program director said, that's why pro wrestling will never be on my TV station.

And it's not just AEW or, you know,

the initials don't matter, the NWA, whatever.

When these people who don't give a fuck about wrestling except as a commodity on their station, if they won't watch this, we'll get fucking

Hucklebuck Rules.

What's that fucking guy's name?

Vanderpump.

We'll get that.

We'll get something somebody watches.

They don't have to have wrestling.

So

they think of wrestling by what the experience they have is, and it's all wrestling.

And

Vince, to his credit, that's what he was trying to overcome that a lot of the promoters inflicted on himselves.

But

now it's gotten completely out of hand.

Does a cable network or a broadcast platform

do they want to deal with a company that's listed on the New York Stock Exchange, that's involved TKO, that's with Endeavour, multi-billion-dollar company producing all this television programming?

They're the brand name.

Yeah.

Or do they want to deal with some guy

that's putting on a program where they're drinking each other's blood legitimately for real

on their fucking pay-per-views?

What do they think they're going going to get on their TV show?

A human sacrifice?

Goat fucking?

What?

And you're not even talking about the idea.

What if Adam Page somehow gets a blood-borne disease or something?

I'm not saying Swerve has anything, but we don't know what's going on.

Usually, you don't drink people's blood like that, especially in a public sphere.

Usually, you don't drink people's blood like that.

No, normally you put it in a glass, a couple of cubes of ice, maybe a little garnish.

But you don't just drink up on

You don't know what's going on with people, you know?

So, hey, and somebody's going to out there, hold on, because very important point you just made, and I don't want anybody to fucking misconscrew it.

Somebody's going to say, oh, all those wrestlers are tested and they have to go through the health protocol.

In the WWE, they are.

We don't know what the fuck's going on over there at the medical facilities.

Even if he's tested.

Hey, did you get your test bag?

Yeah, I got nothing.

All right, I'll drink it.

There's no argument that anyone can make that make me say, okay, I'll just lay here and drink some of that blood.

None.

Can I, if we're talking about this match, before we review the match, talking around the match, can I ask you something about the actual booking of

what's been happening beyond the match and the spectacle of it, beyond the fact that it happened?

How did any of this help Adam Page?

He lost.

After all of that, he lost.

The cool heel one.

The guy who breaks into houses, mugs people in their houses.

Terrorizes babies.

Does promos on babies and throws merch at them.

This guy, after all of that.

Hey, we've said it a million times.

You can terrorize a baby.

You can cut promos on a baby, but you can't throw the merchandise.

Adam Page is suddenly wearing black.

You didn't see the promo on Dynamite because you didn't watch it.

He did a good for Adam Page promo to fire people up.

Has this long,

torturous match for both the audience and the person in it, whoever you want to be on the side of, other than Nana, who's having a ball.

Yeah.

He's having a ball.

He's a bad.

I love you, poo-poo, to Prince Nana, by the way.

I've always loved Nana.

You know what?

He is.

He is so perfect with Swerve because he's the exact opposite of Swerve.

Whatever seriousness and badassery Swerve gives off, Nana's out there doing his dance and it works.

But it went on forever and then Adam Page lost.

I don't want to see these guys again.

After the last match, it's like, okay, it's over.

The feud's over.

And then they introduced all this other stuff.

And then he lost again.

He lost again.

But no, wait, it makes perfect sense because the babyface fighting for the honor of his baby

kicked the shit out of the heel last week on free television and took the heat completely off the fucking heel.

So on the show that they had to pay to see,

where that's where you would expect retribution, that's when they turned the tables and the heel won.

And the babyface was standing there with his tiny dick in his ineffective hand.

Here's what the finish should have been.

Adam Page should have beat the shit out of Swerve, gotten him down, and then pulled back and stopped.

And then waved to someone in the crowd.

Here's the wife pushing the crib through the crowd.

He hits Swerve with the crib

and then the kid urinates.

He holds the kid over Swerve and he urinates on Swerve.

Everyone gets retribution.

The kid, the wife, and of course, Adam, the hangman page.

You know what?

I swear to God, I was with you until I thought you were going to say it.

He hits Swerve with the baby.

You know, they have fake windows and they have fake offices.

Why not a fake baby you can use as a gimmick?

Why not?

At this point,

Snitsky had one.

Don't kick the baby.

You know, folks, again, this is more entertaining than the match was.

What we're talking about here now, but back to seriousness for a second.

So, yes.

So, let's say,

for the purposes of saying what a lot of other people have been talking about, that

all these media rights that are still up in the air, whether it's AEW's renewals or whether it's WWE's uncompleted arrangements or whatever, and things are switching around, popping around from network to network.

If WBD

was indeed interested

in having the WWE programming on their networks, the programs that don't lose 25% of the audience from start to finish or don't have an audience to begin with, or the programs that do end on time, except when they're scheduled to go over, and the programs that do come from buildings with fucking people in them.

Then

what is to prevent them,

regardless of what kind of deal exists now, to them saying, you know what?

God damn, when this thing's over with, this contract is up, do we want to go with the people that are listed on the New York Stock Exchange or do we want to go with the people that are drinking blood and using using broken glass and barbed wire?

And

I haven't seen, hey, kids don't try this at home in a while.

And you know what?

I'm looking at fucking YouTube and kids are trying this at home.

There's the fucking Wheeler Useless, his little pudgy brother that jumps off the shed into barbed wire.

What's his name?

Superhuman.

That's one example.

I don't know how many kids are trying this specific thing.

Well, I mean, kids are stupid these days, but to put it for any reason, it's distasteful.

It's ridiculous.

From a television network broadcasting standpoint, why would you want to show that to a wide audience?

That's the kind of shit they used to have on the late-night VHS commercials, too shocking for television.

And the train runs over the fucking guy and splatters him everywhere.

You're probably not going to see that on NBC.

But

from a professional standpoint, these selfish, self-indulgent fucking pricks.

Why would they not leave anything else for not only any individual in their business to ever do to anybody ever again,

but

their own company, sabotage their own main events, not only in the building, but their own future business.

What is going to be done?

How do you get heat on somebody?

How does somebody hurt somebody anymore?

There is no heat.

Hey, they went into Adam Page's house to terrorize his family.

What did the crowd crowd do when Adam Page finally started kicking Swerve's ass?

They chanted Swerve's house.

Yes.

They booked Swerve the Eel to be liked.

It was an intentional thing.

They booked this guy to be liked, and the fans liked him.

The baby sounds like a bullshit.

Well, I mean, also, it's Paige to begin with, and who likes him?

Nobody.

But again,

just to do your stories, even if all the fans watching AEW AEW know it's fake and they reinforce that thought at every opportunity,

just to do your own program.

Okay, I would like

so-and-so to hurt MJF to set up some type of angler feud or match or whatever.

Well, let's see what can we do to him to hurt him and make people feel sorry for him that he's been hurt by this.

This no-good son of a bitch.

Can we break a cinder block over his head?

Nah.

What if he got thrown off an airplane?

Well, that might work, but it's going to be awful hard to shoot.

We're going to have to throw the cameraman with the GoPro on his head out of the plane also so he can follow him all the way down.

But no, seriously, they've hit a guy with a fucking cinder block.

They've dropped people upside down through fucking tables and or boards wrapped in barbed wire.

They've fucking done everything but jam the fucking hand grenade up the guy's ass and pull the pin.

and it's it's it's not only

they've somehow managed to be fake and phony and at the same time real and dangerous

and silly and stupid and at the same time distasteful and repulsive

and

i i don't know how that

anybody operating that fucking fiasco over there couldn't have gone to to tony and said are Are you out of your mind?

You're going to let them do this shit?

Well, you're killing your own business.

And that's why that they continue to trend downward.

You can't follow the shit because the shit's always the same and they do too much of it.

And then the next time somebody sees it, they say, oh, it didn't beat that guy.

It didn't beat the other guy.

Well, I would have beat this guy.

And he has half a fucking team because they're all hurt.

They're all injured.

Wonder why.

Doing stupid shit that nobody believes anyway.

Nobody cares about any of them.

They're just sitting there.

The fans they have left and the ones they had to begin with.

It is all cut from the same cloth.

They're sitting there watching people bash each other over and over with shit with no meaning, no context.

And they just want to go, oh, oh,

and then they leave and they can't remember half of it when they went home.

Go ahead.

I'm sorry.

Well, the fact that Adam Page lost still is amazing, but you have to remember what AEW is.

It's Tony Kahn

using the money his dad has given him to live out his dream.

And what Tony does is he tries to let these wrestlers live out whatever dream, whatever idea they have.

He doesn't want to say no.

He only wants to expand upon what they want to do.

That's AEW.

That's the reality of AEW.

So So I don't know whether, again, the distastefulness or the unprofessionalism or the phoniness or the silliness at the same time risking their

various bones.

I say risk their neck, their legs, their whatever the fuck.

But let's talk about these fucking self-indulgent nitwits.

Whoa, those are the phone's going to ring.

I forgot to move the phone.

Those nitwits on the phone.

Hold on.

Hello.

Hello.

Hi.

You're a fucking electronic voice speaking to me, and I'm humoring you.

I like to fuck donkeys.

How about you?

Whoa.

You know, I don't think it's programmed to take that response.

Yeah, I hope it's not recorded.

Yeah, I said hello because I was going to choose somebody out, right?

It was like, hello.

I'm like, hello?

Hello.

This is so-and-so is such-and-such.

And you heard what I said.

And then there was just silence, but it was a recorded voice.

Anyway, where were we?

I don't know.

Are we still on the air now?

We can be.

We don't have to be, but we were talking.

We were not reviewing.

We were just talking about some of the reasons.

Well,

we were about to review it.

Because again, I think I was saying whether the unprofessionalism or the fakeness and phoniness and the risk, and everybody's hurt.

Everybody's injured because they don't know what the fuck they're doing

and nobody is there to restrain them.

So let's

go up from the beginning of this fucking fiasco to the end when I decided to quit watching wrestling and turned this fucking thing off.

Well, hold on.

Are we going to talk about just that one match right now?

Yes, because that's all I want to talk about of this fucking thing.

So you didn't see the two matches after that?

I mean, you didn't take a break?

No, no, I could not.

I I didn't want to ruin my fucking Sunday any more than it was already ruined.

And I don't want to see any more wrestling after watching this fucking thing.

And I don't want to talk about what I saw beforehand.

I know but this was bad enough.

This isn't a dynamite.

This is a pay-per-view.

The listeners want to hear you talk about, you know, the MJF thing is a big culmination of things even happening on this show.

I see.

And now I hear you following your.

I know you like a book, Brian.

Last.

You're going to try to fucking talk me.

No.

I'm just trying to get you to do what

you want.

All your loyal listeners, what all your loyal listeners are hoping they get to hear from you, a review, a thorough review, a thought.

If they wanted, if anybody at AEW wanted me to watch this whole show or anybody else for that matter, they should have put all the good shit on before this match.

You mean to tell me that

the natural response of most wrestling fans or human beings after you saw something like this be, boy, I can't wait to see some more fucking wrestling.

Well, if you think I'm going to try to talk you into watching those other two matches, you're right.

But let me just say, I don't think you're wrong in that respect because if you had kept the TV on, you would have seen that for the final two matches, including the Young Bucks, and this is a hometown show for them, or so to speak,

the crowd was dead.

The crowd was burned out because it wasn't just the brutality.

It was the length of it.

And

it's it's hard to follow that.

Like you said, how do you ever follow that?

But it's hard to follow it that night.

The horribleness and awfulness of it will never be forgotten.

And that's the point.

You're shitting on your co-workers and on the main events.

You know, the matches that were at the top of the card because the people were supposed to pay to see them instead of your undercard bullshit.

I mean, those guys,

if they had done that in any territory or it actually

in WWE or F or WCW in the 90s, well, not only would they have been fired because they would have been going into business for themselves, they wouldn't have been allowed to do that, but a lot of the boys in the locker room would have been standing in line to kick shit out of them.

Because what the fuck?

Can you see, goddamn, Steve Austin?

or the Undertaker having to go out in the money match that sold fucking however many millions of dollars of pay-per-views after something like this underneath

without going in there and kicking the shit out of these two guys

holy christ

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Anyway, the match was a Texas death match.

No, it wasn't.

It was billed as a Texas death match.

It was what Tony Kahn calls a Texas death match, and which is basically the same thing as every other AEW

no DQ lazy booking match.

Anything goes.

There are no rules.

And you can do anything you want to do.

There's,

and there's no other goddamn difference in all of their fucking matches.

None of the Texas death match rules that were observed for 70 years before this apply.

Well, I mean, to be fair, the rest of the matches on the show after this, none of the rules are really

in application there either.

When it comes to tag team matches, everyone being in the ring in a tornado fashion, you see a lot of that.

Well, but at least Nana got dancing girls.

Can you explain to me why that they make the heels entrances so cool and have the

cast of extras or the singers or the dancers or the rappers or the hippers or the hoppers?

And then the baby faces just wander out like fucking putses.

Maybe that's another reason why that they cheer the heels.

That's the ultimate example of Mark booking.

The idea that they think Swerve is going to be the cool heel, not realizing that cause and effect in 2023, it actually hurts everything if that's the way you present it.

Well, I thought they were Nana's dancing girls.

I guess Swerve had that entrance, too.

The attention was on Nana and the dancing girls, not Swerve.

I think Nana was the leader of the dancing girls.

Hey.

No, no, I'm not saying he's one of them.

He's like their...

What's the main dancer, the choreographer of the dancing girls?

He was the Tony Basil.

That's right.

Of the group.

All right.

That's right.

And then people love Swerve and it's Swerve's house and they like Swerve and then to avoid being booed out of the building, apparently, old Hangnail hit the ring with no music or introduction and they began the fight.

And immediately they went to the floor.

And within

what after they rattled each other off the railing or whatever, within a minute, Hangnail stopped the match completely dead so that he could find a chair and go into the ring, get some duct tape.

And then he got a staple gun

and he gets in a ring.

And Swerve is having to sell this whole time.

And then

he puts his hands together and duct tapes Swerve's wrists together.

Obviously,

does Swerve look like a guy to you that Paige would be able to duct tape his fucking hands together if he wasn't letting him?

No.

Okay.

So then

old Hangnail gets a staple gun and staples Swerve's chest.

He's stapling him in the titties,

not the nipples.

Now that's against the Geneva Convention.

And then he gets a format or a piece of paper or whatever, and he staples it to Swerve's arm.

Now, meanwhile, Brian, you know what a staple gun looks like.

Now, you worked in an office.

Of course.

Do you think most of the people know what a staple gun looks?

It's a big metal metal thing, and you squeeze it, and it's got the thing, goes across your fingers, and you squeeze it, and it staples, right?

Right.

If you're in a fight with a motherfucker, especially if you look like Adam Page and the other motherfucker looks like Swerve Strickland,

and you've got a staple gun in your hand, are you going to staple him in the titty or are you going to draw back and punch him in the bridge of the fucking nose with it?

But it's a metal object.

Yes!

That's the idea.

He's got brass knuckles on his hand and he's stapling this motherfucker's arm.

The fuck.

And then he stapled his face and Swerve is letting him do it.

And because we know

that this is all fake,

because of the general overall presentation of AEW,

People are sitting there going, well, this stupid motherfucker is letting this other stupid motherfucker staple his fucking cheek and his titties

and

at that point somehow he's busted swerve open

also and swerve

hit a gusher

and starts pouring blood

and this is where

paige lays down on his back as Swerve is bending over bleeding from his head, lays down on his back and opens his mouth so that he can drink Swerve's blood to show how badass he is.

And I believe at that point, you know,

again, I go back to when Lyndon Johnson said after Cronkite came back from Vietnam: if we've lost Cronkite, we've lost America.

I think they've lost the female audience that they might not have had to begin with

on that one.

And they might have lost the network that they potentially might or might not have had off of that one.

What you fucking idiot.

Just, he's no better than the plumber or the fucking bank-addicted drug robber.

He got more hair.

That's it, old page.

Otherwise, he's as stupid and demented and fucking distasteful.

So then

he got a barbed wire wrapped chair.

But while he was going to find that, because there's one of those lying under the ring at every wrestling event.

Whose job is that to wrap the chair?

Well, and the thing is, by the time that they finish doing this, you can tell that the barbed wire is phony

because

they

take so many bumps in this and so hit each other with the chair wrapped in barbed wire and take the bumps on the boards wrapped in barbed wire and wrap the barbed wire around each other and tie each other up with it, that they would be ripped to shreds.

And maybe the people in Los Angeles are not familiar with barbed wire.

I bet there's a few neighborhoods out there that got some razor wire,

but anybody that's ever been within 10 miles of a fucking farm

knows that you know, you would have, you would look like you were a tomato thrown through a screen door if that barbed wire was legitimate.

So

all of their wounds mostly appeared to be self-inflicted.

But nevertheless, then

here's how stupid they both are and how Paige

he will never get over if they fucking stick a tube of helium up his ass and inflate him like the Hindenburg will never get over because he doesn't know how to be a baby face.

He keeps stapling swerve.

So swerve, the heel, hulks up and doesn't sell the stapling

and takes the stapler while it's in Paige's own hand and turns it around and makes the baby face staple his own fucking face.

Can I repeat that?

He made the baby face holding the staple gun staple his own fucking face.

So then, very Very three-stooges-esque.

Oh, well, and then Mo leveled Curly.

Hey.

Sweetenly.

And then Swerve gets the staple gun and just walks around the ring stapling himself over and over while he's laughing about it.

So now they started and killed the staple gun in fucking five minutes.

And then Swerve pulled out a concrete block and put it on the apron of the ring and gave Hangnail a Death Valley driver on the apron on top of the block.

And he actually did land, he caught some of the ropes on the way down to kind of difflect it a little bit, but the motherfucker landed him back of his shoulders first on the block,

which is a perfect fucking spinal treatment if you're a professional athlete and expect to use your body for several more years.

And then

Swerve gave Hangnail a pile driver on the top edge of the barricade, and then Hangnail got him some color.

And this time,

I guess, because in the past he's been accused of being trepidatious of the blade,

he went asshole to appetite on this one.

Now they're both pouring the blood.

And so now at this point, they get in the ring and start doing wrestling moves to each other.

And by the way, every once in a while,

they will let the referee count them.

But whether they're shot by the bazooka or run over by the Sherman tank or hammered by the rainbow bread truck or whatever, they always seem to get up by seven or eight.

And then finally, Hangnail puts a loop of barbed wire around Swerve and ties his arms,

allegedly ties his arms.

And that's another giveaway.

If that was wire, you don't need to try to tie it.

All you got to do is crimp it.

It's like a heavy-duty version of your goddamn loaf of bread tie.

You crimp it a time or two, it'll stay.

But he puts the loop around and ties his arms and then body slams him on it.

And I wrote, my God, I can't wait for this to be over.

But apparently we had to.

Then Hangnail gave Swerve a tombstone on the barbed wire chair.

And the referee was counting to 10.

Of course, swerve got up at eight or nine, which was actually about 30 seconds.

So now we know that if you get tombstoned on a metal folding chair wrapped in barbed wire by hangnail page, you'll be up in the time it takes to watch a TV commercial.

And they better hope that nobody watched this at all, or they might as well fold their fucking tent.

It was my notation at the time.

It was the biggest crowd in months.

Yeah, well, there you go.

So, at the exact worst time possible, they draw a crowd to see this fucking abortion.

So, then Swerve powerbombed the fucking idiot on the barbed wire chair and then hit the double stomp off the top rope on the barbed wire chair on him.

And then Swerve brought in a bag of broken glass and poured it on top

of hangnail and then went to the top rope and gave him a 450-degree splash off the top rope.

Why would you do that?

Why would you willingly hurt yourself to kick the shit out of somebody?

It's so fucking stupid and childish.

They act like they're in a video game.

And none of this is real, and they aren't really fucking human.

Did you see Dax, old Dax Hardwood, our friend in FTR?

Did you see what he tweeted this morning?

I did not.

The morning after picture.

He's got his head was busted open.

I couldn't tell whether, because it was Twitter and it was small, whether it was a stitch or two in there and a black eye and dings on his head

and just a close-up of his face.

And he was tweeting, you know, I wonder what the The business people in first class on this plane that I'm on, because he's sitting on the plane, think about my face, but that's what we go through for the love of the sport and the whatever the fuck, right?

Positive uplifting.

I said, if there's anybody in the goddamn wrestling business in first class, they probably think you ought to find some fucking opponents that can work and a goddamn booker that realizes you're human beings and not video game characters.

Because they're all beat up and they're all hurt and they're destroying their body for this fucking Richie Rich motherfucker to masturbate over his live-action toys, and they're not smart enough to fucking prevent their goddamn demise at his hands

because they think this shit's good.

I'm not talking about Dax now.

I'm talking about these other nitwits.

I sympathize with Dax for being in the ring with his tag team partner, Ricky Starks, and five other goofy motherfuckers that can't work.

But anyway, we had broken glass in there now.

So then.

Broken glass.

Everywhere.

Everywhere.

And mustard.

So then Swerve pulled in a barbed wire covered plywood sheet and put it across two chairs.

But

somehow they ended up on the top rope and Hangnail gave him the fallaway slam through

all of that, which he went through it as well.

and hopped right up and gave him a power bomb on the board and then the dead eye on the board where he drops the guy headfirst.

And then he wrapped the barbed wire around Swerve's neck and his swerve stood up because, of course, after naturally, what do you do after you've been fallaway slammed off the top rope through a board with barbed wire stuck between two chairs, then power bombed and then deade-eyed, but you stagger up,

you fucking moron.

And then he hit the buckshot Lariat on Swerve with the wire around Swerve's neck.

And you'll never guess what happened, Brian.

Swerve was almost counted out.

But fortunately, Nana pulled him to the floor where he

pulled him out and Swerve just stood up on his feet after all of that.

He's like, oh, fuck, I've got barbed wire around my neck.

And then suddenly,

Brian Cage, that goddamn fucking giant meat whistle,

fucking just hits the ring out of nowhere and attacks Page right in front of the referee and starts kicking the shit out of him.

Well, if that's okay, why did he wait till Swerve almost bled to death?

We're Paige's friends.

Well, yeah,

well, there you go.

He just told on himself.

Adam Page does not have one single solitary swinging dick in that locker room that will come out.

and prevent him from getting filleted by like a fish by three people.

They literally just did that with MJF on Dynamite, where he got his his ass kicked by Bullet Club Gold and no one came out to save him because he hasn't made a deal with Joe and no one else wants to help him.

Once again, Adam Page gets his ass kicked.

Where are the Bucks?

Where's Omega?

Where's anyone?

No one comes out.

Where's the Dorquer?

Where's his lawnmower?

So Cage, it wasn't like Cage interfered and jumped out.

He just takes over the match.

And then he

gives Page a power bomb and a buckle bomb and an F5

and then pulls out a table.

But Paige gets the barbed wire after all of those moves and gets up and beats Cage up with the barbed wire.

And then here comes Nana.

And Nana hits Paige with a chair.

And Paige bows up, which you should when the manager uses a gimmick at some point.

That's an acceptable spot.

Of course, not from a corpse because Paige should have been dead five times already.

But then he takes Nana out on the apron and gives him the dead eye off the apron through the fucking table.

Why?

God damn it.

If you were writing,

number one, personally, like I said, Nana's the only person in this whole equation that I give a shit about.

I hope he's okay.

Secondly,

if you were writing the manager out for months or maybe ever,

do that.

But it just to do that, then if he's back on TV in the next six weeks without extensive physical rehabilitation,

then it just makes Paige look like a weak fuck that he did.

The poor Nana, who's

well, I don't want to reveal Nana's age.

He's very young looking, but he's been around for 20 years.

He's 65 years old.

Quit, now stop.

He's not.

From Queens.

Oh, come on.

He's not 65 years old.

He may be from Queens, but he's not 65.

But anyway,

point being, why would you do that?

And he's going to walk out on TV in the next week or two.

Because Paige is a fucking moron.

It doesn't know anything about wrestling or babyfacing.

He's not going to walk out on TV.

He's going to dance out on TV.

Well, there you go.

And he can't wear a neck brace because that's Roderick Strong's gimmick.

So you fucking moron, Paige, by the way.

Okay, back to this.

Then,

as he's done that to Nana, Swerve gets the fake fucking cinder block

and breaks it over Paige's head from behind.

And it just

explodes into powder.

It looks like the old manager threw the powder spot.

You can't do that to a real cinder block with a sledgehammer.

And then he takes a chain.

A big old logging chain and wrapped it around Paige's neck and threw it over the top turnbuckle.

And it didn't look as good as the dirty white boy and fucking Horner and Smogy Mountain or the dirty white boy and Tom Pritchard in Continental.

But he hung

Paige by the neck until the referee counted him out to 10.

Technically, Paige was still on his feet.

And imagine,

Brian, I'll leave you with this one.

Imagine if that visual had been reversed

and the white cowboy from Virginia had been pulling that chain around the neck of the black rapper from Seattle or wherever he's from up there.

No, they could never do that.

Well, what's the goddamn difference?

You're doing a lynching on goddamn television

to add to all this other shit.

Oh, Oh, again, that was something

you got by with in the territory days because it was local television and

everybody involved was the same complexion.

But then, again, what the fuck just ended with a lynching of any human being after this, the rest of this distasteful, unprofessional,

and incredibly phony yet dangerous bullshit.

Were you surprised Adam Page didn't win?

I was astonished, Adam Page.

The fucking babyface loses the blow-off.

Well, is this the blow-off?

I guess that's the question.

What will be the third match?

What?

AK-47's at 10 paces.

What else can they do?

Gum Alley.

I don't know what they could do, but the fact that he lost.

I can't imagine this is how it ends.

The guy went to his house and then he lost.

Is he going to move away?

Well, Yeah, because then the guy went to Swerve's house.

He got his ass beat.

Looks like Paige is going to stay home and send his baby to live with Swerve at this point.

Do you have the time?

Do you know how long it went?

Three or four days.

I don't have it in front of me.

I wish I did know because it did go on a long time.

It gets Swerve.

With those fans, it gets Swerve more over, and he's been only getting more and more over.

Does nothing for Adam Page.

And it does nothing for any audience they don't already have.

That's what that's everything they do prevents them from getting any audience they don't already have, because this is the sum total of people that will watch bad, phony, silly, gymnastic

wrestling in quotation marks.

Well, that's the thing.

WWE, they give you the minimal amount on their television shows, but with overarching stories and characters and people they're presenting as stars.

AEW, you get either just guys working matches or just complete brutality.

And the question is: does this, again, it's on pay-per-view, so you're kind of preaching to the choir in terms of who your audience is for this specific event.

But does brutality cause people to become wrestling fans, or does

characters, promos, personalities, star power caused them to become pro wrestling fans.

Characters, personalities, star power make

a large percentage of the fans.

There's always going to be somebody that sees something and goes, oh, you know, I got to watch more of this.

But

the...

I think the justification in some of these morons' minds

for doing this is because they go, oh, well, there was Abdullah the butcher and there was the sheikh and there was always violence.

And, you know, Wild Bill Longson hit people with chairs or whatever.

Context matters.

Presentation matters.

The reason why those things got over with those people in those times was because the fans,

A,

could believe the individual that was doing it was doing it.

They weren't all smart.

They weren't, it wasn't all see-through.

It wasn't all obvious.

It was not just some

buggy whip-armed Yahoo that was allowed to come in and wreak havoc and bust people open or fucking go crazy.

It was people who looked like they fit the part.

and could carry it off.

And it was presented as a serious thing on the television program in the buildup.

And it was not overdone

week after week.

And everybody was allowed to do it.

And as well, they've lost the plot completely on

how to position

the guys on their roster and in their matchups

instead of just for the Mark fans who want to, oh, golly, I bet that's going to be a great match.

And that's going to be, they're going to really work hard to have some emotional investment in wanting to see someone attain something,

someone to win and someone to lose.

Brian, you're a baseball fan, right?

And bass, yeah.

A bassball fan, but mostly baseball.

I started to say basketball is what I did.

I love basketball.

It's a great movie.

No, I love baseball.

All right.

You love baseball.

But we know you like the Mets, right?

I love the Mets.

Who's your second favorite team?

There is no second favorite team.

Okay, well, let me ask you this.

You love baseball.

You love to watch the Mets play.

Absolutely.

Okay, who are the two worst teams in the goddamn league?

The worst teams in the league?

Yeah.

Oh, geez.

Well, the Marlins actually had a pretty good year.

We're going

division by division.

Arizona made it to the playoffs.

Well, okay, you don't have to know.

Who are two crummy teams?

Two crummy teams in the past year.

The Cardinals had a pretty crummy year, even though traditionally they've been pretty good.

And I guess you could say the Padres had a very disappointing year.

Okay.

You love baseball.

The Cardinals and the Padres are on TV.

You're going to skip it or are you going to watch it?

Depends.

It depends on what else is on.

But if there's nothing on, I would certainly put it on and have it on in the background.

Sure.

If something else is on, such as an all-night gas station or a fucking new Denny's opening.

Well, if it's like a TV show I want to watch versus a baseball game not involving the Mets, I'll choose the TV show I want to watch.

If it's the Mets, I find a way to watch both or I watch the Mets.

Yeah, well, the point I'm trying to make

is that in any contest or conflict or sporting event or game or match or fight or whatever,

most people.

watch because they want one or the other side or team or entities to win, right?

They don't just watch it because they...

If you're a baseball fan, you don't watch every goddamn game that every major league team plays because it's goddamn baseball.

You can't.

I think typically that's right.

I mean, there are fans who will watch a lot of games, but I think a lot of fans like their team.

They watch their team's games.

They may occasionally watch other teams and, of course, highlight shows, but day to day, it's about your team.

Yeah, so the point is you get people invested in one side or the other.

And that is the foundation of wrestling, is to the reason why the heel babyface dynamic was invented back in the days of the Goldust trio

is because it helps sell tickets when naturally

Ali and Frazier was the biggest event of its time in boxing because Ali was an incredible polarizing figure, but there was somebody to root for and somebody to root against, depending on which side you were on on both sides.

Or any rivalry in sports.

So the University of Kentucky, University of Louisville.

It's not just the game they're playing.

It's who's playing it and how it's presented.

And that's what they're just trying to do.

Every goddamn wrestling trope, as the kids say it, or cliche or angle or deal or finish or...

plagiarize and, you know, prostitute every,

you know, wrestling thing that they've seen or heard of or watched on YouTube.

And everybody's allowed to do everything.

And there's no

contextualizing of who you're supposed to really root for and who you're supposed to be against.

The WWE has all those things.

Now, people may

violate that.

They may not really hate Dominic.

They'd like to just boo because it's cool.

But they're still,

they know whose side they're supposed to be on.

They know who they're supposed to want to see when.

It makes sense.

In the hundred years leading up to when the wrestling business went to shit,

you were

pretty much out of business if the people didn't know whose side they were supposed to be on, whose side the wrestlers were each on, and why they were mad at each other.

And then you could do anything from there.

But the Tony is just because of his

chemical brain makeup that has led to whatever medication he, again, he is on or needs to be on,

it's just all about the, oh my God, these matches and these moves and this go, oh my God, it'll be so great, great, great, great, great.

And he's going to kill everybody.

Not it.

I'm not just talking about business-wise.

I'm talking about physically.

Well, of course, Jim, not everyone thought of it, what you thought of it.

I did hear from a lot of people who did like it.

A lot of people thought it was the most brutal match in wrestling history, but I guess this will.

It was brutal, all right.

Here's one example.

Dave Meltzer tweeted out last night.

I'm sure he did.

Swerve won the death match after a cinder block shot and hanging him with a chain.

This would have been remembered as an all-time classic if it,

if it ended without the interference.

Maybe it will be even with.

So, do you think Brian Cage's interference took away from this match's status as an all-time classic?

Boy, how do I answer that question?

No, this match would have been an all-time stinker regardless, but Cage's, yes, it did take it down even a further notch.

How low can you go with that stupid business in front of the referee and et cetera?

But

again, what

at some point, somebody has to

try to be the adult in the room and tell these children.

And I'm not talking about

the world's oldest teenager, Dave Meltzer.

I'm talking about somebody that

has got to go in there and say, look, you can't keep doing this shit.

It's ridiculous.

You're killing the business, not only for

your own company, but for future generations.

What's left to do?

It's all phony and silly.

It makes no sense.

There's no control here.

There's no context.

And it's unprofessional.

And you're going to get kicked off television doing this shit sooner or later.

All of those things.

But nobody will because Tony's richie rich and he's not used to Cadbury telling him no when he wants a second poached egg.

Fuck.

Well, that was the review of Swerve versus Page at AEW Folgear.

And I know this is your show, but this is probably around the time we should transition to a sponsor.

No,

I'm not in the mood to do a goddamn commercial either.

I'll tell you what I'm going to do.

We're going to make note of a few pay-per-views.

Hold on, let me throw the rest of the pay-per-view notes across the room.

No, no.

We're going to make note

of a second.

Wait a minute.

Hold on now.

You hear that?

I hear lawnmowers.

No, sirens.

Oh, no.

Fire engine coming down the road.

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Anyway, real quick, it's not a full-fledged Reggie's corner,

but I've got sad news before we go any further in this program.

Hank next door has passed away.

And of course, he's known here on the program as the

The puppy dog that used to come over here and shed on my sidewalk.

But Hank was Harley's friend.

He was 15 or 16.

I can't remember which, but he'd had cancer for some time and old age.

And finally,

his mother had to make the

choice to

send him on.

But within two days, a new puppy is here.

We're glad to welcome Tucker to the neighborhood.

So Tucker has replaced Hank next door to the castle here.

And this woman has no idea.

I even do a podcast, and I'm sure she'd be mortified at some of the language used.

But I wanted to remember Hank because he has been somewhat of a recurring character here on the program.

All right.

This has been a real upbeat episode.

I was serious.

Do you want to transition to a commercial?

No, I got another email here.

I got another email here from Darm.

Darm.

D-H-A-R-M.

Boy,

I'm glad that he didn't have Mama Cornette because she would have said, Darm, damn it.

He would have been all fucked up.

Anyway, something about what we've been talking about.

And I mentioned this earlier.

I couldn't remember,

come to find out the name of it, but it's not a guy.

It's a lady.

Darm wrote, Vanderpump Rules is a reality show about Lisa Vanderpump, who is a former star of Housewives of Beverly Hills.

This apparently was a television program.

Housewives of Beverly Hills.

No wonder people watch AEW on television.

The bar has been lowered.

Apparently, Lisa Vanderpump is a rich 60-year-old housewife from Beverly Hills, originally from England, who is also an entrepreneur and owns roughly 30-plus restaurants.

So apparently she got a heck of a divorce settlement.

What the fuck, rich housewives of Beverly Hills.

You know, it's like my Uncle Dink used to say.

His wife was a great housekeeper.

She'd been married three times, kept a house every time.

I like that show better when it was called Dynasty.

Well, the show Vanderpump Rules, Darm goes on to say, is about her restaurant staff and her PR firm.

It sounds like fucking Dixie.

Oh, my God, it does.

It's melodramatic, exaggerated, staged, manipulated by producers, and is a reality show featuring a bunch of whining restaurant staff who hook up with each other a lot, wannabe models trying to break into Hollywood, who get into fake fights and arguments, endless bickering, relationship and friendships, people breaking up with each other, backstabbing, punching each other every now and then.

It's AEW.

Sounds like AEW.

And he goes on to say it's a stupid show about a bunch of bitches, and by bitches, I mean the guys.

It's about attention whores still talking about the guys,

yelling and cursing each other at each other to be on the wannabe housewives of whatnot show.

So apparently it is AEW.

Vanderpump Root, but they must do it better because they get the bigger rating.

Those reality shows are professional wrestling for women.

It's as fake as anything ever on TV, but they pretend like it's real and they work season-long, sometimes I guess show-long angles that eventually have like fights and payoffs.

It's pro wrestling.

Isn't pro wrestling pro wrestling for women now?

I don't know.

How many girls are in that crowd for full gear?

I'm talking about the ones in the ring.

Oh, well, I guess so.

Anyway.

Got another email follow-up on what we've been talking about with the cordyceps.

Remember the cordyceps?

The mind-controlling spore that takes from the aliens, that takes over on the video game that was also listed as an ingredient in Ric Flair's woo energy drink that apparently does have some basis in the fungal world of reality.

The drink or cordyceps?

Or potentially Ric Flair.

Ric Flair.

In the fungal world of reality.

I love you, Rick.

But Jeremiah

actually says Jay from the Midwest, but in his email it's Jeremiah.

So now I've narrowed it down a little bit further.

Hello, Brian and Jim and Harley.

And she says hello to Jay.

He says want to send a follow-up to Justin from Kentucky's previous cordyceps email.

Cordyceps is indeed a parasitic fungus that invades and takes over the minds and bodies of small creatures such as insects and anthropods.

I believe that might be two of the new AEW tag teams.

The fungus will enter the unassuming host body and slowly take over its brain and motor functions.

The fungus will spread itself throughout the host body until all nutrients and life force is consumed.

During this process, the fungus will also begin to break through the host body, usually in the shape of stems and stalks.

So if you see a motherfucker walking down the street, he's got mushrooms growing out of his shoulders, run.

He likes, he's a Ric Flair fan.

He's got mushrooms growing out of him.

He's a nature boy.

That nature is mushrooms.

Toward the end of the host's life, the fungus will force the host to reach high ground.

When the host reaches high ground, it dies and causes the fungus spores to spread, which leads to any nearby insect to risk becoming infected.

Or as it says on the can, woo!

Woo!

And the idea in the video game The Last of Us is that a strain of cordyceps became powerful enough to infect human hosts, which then led to the global apocalypse and near extinction of humanity.

And apparently, he says if that concept isn't nightmarish enough, there are currently a plethora of fools out there teaching cordyceps how to infect human cells.

Is there now a career of mushroom training

on the black market?

We'll train these mushrooms to take over your cells unless you pay us X amount of money?

Yeah, that's weird.

I don't know.

Anyway, Jay from the Midwest, he says, even cordyceps wouldn't want to live here.

All righty.

And speaking of the Cordyceps and the Woo,

I got another email here from Tyler from Pittsburgh.

Hello, Jim and Brian.

Why do they always mention you?

Because I'm over here.

Well, I'm over here now.

I was listening to the most recent episode of The Experience.

I heard you and Jim, now he's just addressing you directly.

What the fuck?

Hi, Tyler.

It's nice to hear from you.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I heard you and Jim talk about woo energy once again, with you mentioning if other energy drinks had warning labels on them.

Other energy drinks have similar labels, but this isn't what I wanted to talk about.

I have tried the three woo energy flavors and wanted to write in to say that they are not good.

Very, very bad.

Is that what he said?

My girlfriend said they were the worst energy drink she had ever had, mentioning they tasted like Smarties dissolved in battery acid.

Just like Ric Flair.

Now, come on now.

Oh, you can't.

Would you just

yank a knot in that now?

He says they tasted powdery with an unbelievable, artificially sweetened flavor to mask the bitter mushroom-based aftertaste, literally the worst of both worlds.

We haven't discussed the fact it's a mushroom elixir.

It must taste like mushroom, right?

Apparently, there's a bitter mushroom-based aftertaste.

That they try to hide with Smarties and acid or whatever it's called.

And battery acid.

You know, hey, to be fair, you take a sip of battery acid, you're not going to taste a lot of the finer points of things.

To promote the release of the drink, Ric Flair did a local appearance tour taking photos with fans after a purchase of a $30 six-pack.

I see, doing my quick mathematics, that's five bucks a piece for these fine,

fine beverages.

He did these tours through eastern Ohio and the Pittsburgh area, stopping at the giant Eagle grocery store, a Pittsburgh grocery chain throughout the area.

Sounds like when handsome Jimmy used to go to Walmart the afternoon of a show that he might not be booked on and just set up a merchandise table.

How come he's going to where WCW went when they tried to go north in 1982?

Well,

he's following the trail that he's blazed before.

The whole thing was a sad state of affairs as he made his entrance through the meat department.

Oh, come on.

Come on.

Did he have his robe open?

No, wait.

Hey,

that's the keelbasa.

You're looking.

Come on now.

And there's no.

No, he said he made his entrance through the meat department until reaching the sushi section.

What?

We're in the sushi section.

They had set up the photo screen in which pictures were taken.

I did not know prior to this that a six-pack had to be purchased in order to take a photo with Flair, but I was there and figured I could just take them back afterwards.

Yeah, be happy you have to purchase it.

You don't have to drink it.

Well, hold on.

He said, I figured I could just take them back afterwards.

So I figured I'd get in line, but I did not take them back as planned.

As many people in line had the same idea.

So

I tried all the flavors and gave the rest away.

So apparently, everybody went to the store and they bought the fucking six-pack.

They had the picture taken with Flare.

They went up to the fucking customer service and they returned fucking drinks.

That's amazing.

We love you, Nate, but

I don't know about the strawberry

mushroom

cordycep.

I want to see him drink one.

That's what I want.

Well, are you kidding?

If there's a living motherfucker that could drink battery acid and tell the tale, oh, at this point, don't you think it's Rick?

This would be the test.

This would be the ultimate test.

Can Ric Flair drink Ric Flair's drink?

And how much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

How much drink could a Ric Flair drink if a flare, if a Ric Flair could drink Flair's drink?

I want to see how long this drink lasts.

It hasn't appeared on AV.

I want to see how long this podcast lasts from this point out.

Well, we'll go to a sponsor in a second and start moving to the next thing, but

okay, or we can do it now.

That's all.

Oh, wait, no, we don't.

You know, as a matter of fact, fuck it.

I have, what about

Ronda Rousey?

I am being led to believe that Ronda Rousey has now joined the We Wrestle for Fun bunch.

Is that correct?

It was correct for a night.

Time will tell if it's correct for future nights, but at least for one night, she wrestled on an AEW-promoted event as part of Ring of Honor, which is a separate entity.

Yeah, a separate entity in an iron lung.

But what have, for the people who don't know what we're talking about,

I guess Friday night before the fiasco of the Full Gear pay-per-view, they also ran the same building to do the Collision and what's that other show they do, the Rampage, and also Ring of Honor.

Yeah.

And

by the way,

we don't have the numbers because it's a Sunday, it's a weekend.

But I'm going to tease it right now.

I believe this will be the all-time ratings drubbing of a head-to-head

wrestling war type situation on television going back to,

well, going back to since there has been that type of thing.

Because I'm going to say that SmackDown on Friday night on Fox beat Collision on Friday night on what is their goddamn network?

They are still on, they're on TNT for that one, aren't they?

Are they still on TBS?

Or what are they on?

TNT.

They are on TNT for those two on that one night because they heard back-to-back live.

I say they're getting beat by eight times.

That's my prediction.

Eight times the audience is what I'm going to say.

So that means if they did 400,000 viewers,

you think SmackDown will do eight times that amount?

Well, no, because they ain't going to do 400,000.

I'm saying they're going to do 200 and something thousand and

SmackDown's going to do a little over 2 million.

That's my prediction.

But can you think of another time,

whether it be the Attitude Era in the dying days of WCW,

or even when

TNA foolishly tried to go opposite Raw on Monday nights?

Can you think of another time where now it may have been a wider audience disparity because there were so many millions more people watching wrestling back in the Attitude Era,

but can you think of a time where

the winning team, so to speak,

won by that much of a margin, eight times the audience of the opposing promotion.

Well, there haven't been that many head-to-heads in a long time.

And the last time TNA did it, I mean, they had over a million viewers still at that point, right?

When they went head-to-head with Raw.

Well,

they had them until they went on Monday nights.

I think they lost a portion of them, but they still had as many or more as...

AEW has now, at least for collision, definitely.

Collision and Rampage.

Again, you had two shows back-to-back that night.

Two shows for the price of one.

But anyway, where we were going with this was Rounda.

Rounda.

She went to have fun.

She went to team with her friend.

She is now, she's made millions in not only the UFC, but the WWE.

And we mentioned, as it was happening, that her last run

in the WWE, she looked like she was fulfilling her contract is basically what it looked like.

The first time she had fun, she had some really high-profile matches that were put together well.

She was a big star, made a difference in business, didn't

have, but I think in that year, somebody counted up 20-something matches altogether, maybe.

And it was great, right?

And then she leaves and goes to her farm.

And when she comes back, and I still say they made her come back to do the second year of her contract, And she looked like she didn't want to be there.

And she was twisting in the wind on matches.

And

she didn't have the pizzazz and the oomph.

And we talked about it a bunch, right?

But the one thing she did want to do, because Marina Schaefer is her old friend and got her into watching wrestling,

she wanted to team up with Marina.

So now that she's free of that pesky contract with the WWE that paid her millions of dollars, she showed up

at the forum in Los Angeles and they booked her and Marina in a tag team match against whoever.

And they not only put it on Ring of Honor, but they put it on last in the arena that night to tape it when everybody had mostly left because we've heard the emails.

We've seen the the pictures.

Once they finish the live show and they're taping Ring of Honor, it's goddamn stampede to beat the traffic.

So they managed to get the biggest female star that they have yet

signed or even enticed to make an appearance there.

And they use the music.

Well, and they use

reputation.

Well, yes, because Tony loves to pay for music.

But they put her on last on Ring of Honor that shows on the internet somewhere, and the people had left the building.

Explain to me one good reason why, that even if she had to be on Ring of Honor, because she said,

I don't want to be on the big show where people will see me.

I just want to do this for fun.

Then why couldn't they have taped that first

where the people were still in a building?

For fuck's sake, talk about a pre-show.

Can you imagine?

If the first thing the people had seen was here comes Ronda Rousey,

it had been all over the internet, all over Twitter.

Twitter.

People would have tuned into the live collision broadcast to see what the fuck might happen.

And

maybe they would have bought the pay-per-view thinking, oh, God, I'm getting a scoop.

And you can't tell me, even if they say, well, it was West Coast time, so they had to start at 5 o'clock anyway.

Fuck it.

At 4.45, there were more people in the fucking stands than there were after the live show went off the air.

Start early.

I don't know how much there is to really say about this.

I mean, for her, she's just having a good time.

The question is, if you have access to her, what do you want to do with it?

Do you want to make anything of it?

Would she not have allowed that?

Was it a sudden thing?

We actually have some audio from Tony from the Fulbright Media Scrum

talking about Ronda Rousey.

Let's go to this.

Corey Lieb with the Rust Team Server.

Now, obviously, it was a great show tonight, but there was also something yesterday after

Rampage that you really haven't talked about.

So let's talk about it.

Ronda Rousey, how did this, how did they...

Is that how you ask questions?

Is that how you ask questions?

Well, he should have said, what do you guys want to talk about?

What do you want to talk about, Tony?

Is there a deal?

Was this just a one-off?

And also kind of explain, you know, how this came out.

Obviously, it was a tag match at wrestling revolver against uh fena and billy starks that kind of ended in no contest which then obviously ended well that's another thing also ronda rousey has been doing i guess select independent dates near where she is

to have fun also so it's not just a ew or ring of honor she's been making appearances but then she stopped being so selective and showed up may

ended up um having the match um after the show you actually didn't even mention that she was there you just said that marina's friend was, was, was, was in the building.

So, um, is she signed or is or basically, and how did this come about?

She's not signed, but we had a great conversation.

It came about, of course, there was some unfinished business.

They had that match, and I thought it would be great for our fans to settle it in the ring.

And at the Wrestling Revolver show, they had the tag match, and to be honest, I had spoken to them, and I thought it would be great to have a match and build some interest and then have the story come back to Ring of Honor, where Athena is the Ring of Honor women's world champion.

Billy Starks is her minion.

There's a lot of interest in that.

They have a great chemistry for people who don't watch ROA.

By the way, real quick, I have to tell you this because I'm watching a video and I didn't stay up to watch it last night.

I gave up after the pay-per-view ended.

I said, for the first time, I'm going to bed and not watching his scrum.

He's still wearing the Anoki scarf.

Oh, God.

Remember, he started wearing that at the Anoki tribute event in Seattle?

Yes.

Well, he's still wearing it.

So let's go back to Antonio Khan.

ROH Every week, there's some really exciting things happening there.

And Athena's reign is the women's world champion of ROH and Billy Starks as her minion.

It's some really entertaining stuff.

And I thought that it would be great to see that tag team against two of the horsewomen, two

being Marina and Ronda Rousey.

And Rhonda was happy to come here.

and she was great.

The crowd was really excited to see her.

And it was a great match.

We'd love to have her back sometime.

It was really fun being out here.

She's a local.

She lives nearby, and that

really helped make it possible.

She lives in the bowels.

Yeah, it's a plane ticket you didn't have to buy for once.

You know, we'd love to have her back because she was tremendous.

It was a great match.

And if people want to see it, you know,

check out ROH.

Well, I guess no one will be seeing that match.

Do you detect that he's losing some of his energy?

Is this the next step of the breakdown?

Or has he just not had his woo for the night?

Well, again, this is, according to the timestamp here, one hour and 45 minutes into the media scrum,

which was after the entire pay-per-view and, of course, all the thorough production meetings before then.

He has a cup.

It looks like it's a coffee cup.

I mean, we don't know what's in it, but he has a cup.

And of course, his Antonio Inoki red scar.

Well, all right.

And I'm not going to blister Tony.

I'm not going to blister Antonio Khan.

Antonio Khan.

Antonio Khan.

Antonio Kanoki.

I'm not going to blister him.

Stop it now.

How did I not think of that one?

I'm not going to blister him for lying because he had to there.

He could, he had to say, well, yeah, I thought it was a great thing to bring that match back for a Ring of Honor fans.

And again, no.

Any promoter, it is,

I know Tony's not his right mind, but he'd have to be bouncing off the walls and ready for a padded sell if Ronda Rousey came to him and said, I want to wrestle on your show and left the rest of the details up to him.

And that's the match he booked and that's where he put him.

That, no, that didn't happen.

She went to Marina and said, hey, we could do this again.

I had fun.

I don't think these girls will hurt me, whatever.

You want to do it again in the forum?

That'll be fun.

And Marina told Tony, and that's what needed to happen.

That's what Ronda Rousey obviously didn't sign with him.

If she was going to sign with anybody in wrestling, she would have signed back with the people paying her millions of dollars that had got her over.

She doesn't want to do this anymore except for fun.

And Tony couldn't come out and say, yeah, my genius ass had one of the biggest female stars in the world, and I booked her at a fucking Ring of Honor goddamn dark match or whatever.

He had to try to make it sound like there was a reason for it, but obviously she said, we'll come and do the thing in the forum if you want us to.

But it, it.

The only I don't blame him for booking that meaningless match instead of putting her on dynamite or on the pay-per-view and you know helping his company because that's what she wanted to do.

But you could have certainly goddamn

given her what she wanted and served a purpose for your company by putting it on early enough before the live show started that people would think, know she's in the building and think she might be on the TV show they can watch.

That,

I don't know why Rhonda was, and put me at the end when no people people are in the stands.

I can't figure out why she would have dictated that.

The rest of it makes sense.

Well, let me ask you this question as a hypothetical.

If you're the promoter, whether it's Tony Connor or anyone else, and someone the level of star of Ronda Rousey, Ronda Rousey shows up and says, I want to work.

I don't want you to announce it.

I want it to be at the end.

I just want to have fun.

I don't want to be around that many fans.

Do you say yes or do you say no?

Or do you try to talk her into something else?

Well, again,

what

benefit am I getting out of it?

I would say, yes, you can wrestle whoever you want to wrestle and you can team with whoever you want to team with, but at the end of it, you're going to be in and out and nobody's going to know if, and it's on tape, so they're going to air it sooner or later.

So it's not like it was supposed to be a complete secret and just for the audience there.

So that's when I'd say go on first, where at least it'll create some talk before my live show.

You don't have to be on the live show if you don't want to.

We never said you're going to be.

They'll think you will.

That's

one fucking finger fingers the other, so to speak.

So to speak.

So to speak.

But anyway, we'll...

We'll see what happens with Ronda Rousey if she'll be getting a Rousey in AEW.

She may show up at the Derby Park Expo 5 Flea Market for OVW next week.

We're not sure yet.

But you know who's going to show up pretty soon, don't you, Brian?

I don't know.

Maureen Lair.

No, fucking Santa Claus.

Santa Claus is going to show up pretty soon.

Santa Claus is going to be coming down the chimneys of all the good boys and girls.

What about the good boys and girls who are born to

unemployed poor people and don't have a chimney?

Do they get fucked on Christmas?

Well, you're not going to get fucked on Christmas if you go to jimcornet.com and order you some Cornet's collectibles.

No, then you will get, you'll get massaged on Christmas.

You'll get rubbed the right way on Christmas because if you get a present for a friend or potentially close intimate partner, such as the Jim Cornette action figures or the Midnight Express 40th Anniversary Collector set or the t-shirts or the DVDs or the books or the Santa Corny action figures, I've got my own Santa hat.

If you get one of those for your intimate partner, they'll rub you the right way.

And it doesn't have to be all that.

It can be platonic.

Get one for everybody you like.

If you're a

mean, miserable son of a bitch and don't like anybody, then get a couple of things for people you don't like and write fuck you on the front of them.

That's right.

And make sure you request a long note to be handwritten by Jim Cornette because he loves doing that.

Well, you can request all you want.

That's just like wishing.

You can wish in one hand and shit in the other one, see which one fills up first.

But your stockings will be full if you get the stocking stuffers at jimcornet.com during the Cornettes Collectibles holiday season sale.

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All right.

Well, you know what?

We could talk about the good wrestling.

Can you believe I'm about to say this?

We could talk about the WWE,

the good stuff.

We could, but why don't we first talk about a good night's sleep?

And of course, we know some of the things that we're not ready to do commercials yet.

I'll tell you when I want to do a commercial.

We've been going a while.

Just want to point that out.

Well,

are you getting bored?

No, I'm not getting bored, but we have friends out there who love when we talk about their fine products and let everyone.

Well, promo.

I got friends out there that love it when I fucking talk about them at all.

And I'm not ready to talk about them.

I want to talk about SmackDown from November 17th, the show that won the ratings war.

We know that much already.

But

again,

the WWE

is running away with this thing.

It's not even close.

And the reason is because even though they are boring us to fucking tears,

there is nothing on this show with any grit, any passion.

any goddamn emotion, any violence, any animosity.

Oh, there's animosity.

Well, but it's all in the locker room.

But what there is on this show is there are some stars doing some things that kind of half-ass make a little sense and that people can remember afterwards.

And apparently that's all it takes now because the other program is such mindless, meaningless drivel repeated over and over on fast forward at a high rate of speed.

that it's just gone off and left anybody that's not already into the thing trying to figure it out.

They're over here where shit's simple, and they could eat a fucking ham and cheese sandwich on the couch while they watch it instead of taking notes to try to remember who these goddamn people are.

Yeah, no one ever says, oh, another tournament?

I've never heard that from a WWE fan.

Another tournament?

Another battle royal?

Oh, my God.

So on SmackDown on the 17th, there was very little of anything happening, but what did?

Built for Survivor Series?

And unfortunately, now, Brian, thankfully, I've sworn off watching Pro Wrestling after AEW has driven me off the edge of a cliff because

they're going to, at the Survivor Series War Games, and we mentioned, boy, they've finally got

four or five strong baby faces that can face four or five strong heels.

They got a real kind of War Games thing.

Guess what they're going to have before they have the war games?

What they're going to have before the war?

A concert.

No,

they're going to have women's war games.

Well, yeah, of course.

You knew that was coming, didn't you?

I was hoping not.

We have this conversation.

I know they've done it before.

Every year, I feel like every year for like five years straight, you and I have had this conversation.

I'm sorry, but I've been in the wrestling business in and around it for 50 years, and I just naturally assume that when you announce one fucking main event blow-off match, that you're not going to have another one 45 minutes before you have that one on the same show.

Fucking God damn it.

That's what Dusty should have done.

Misty Blue and whoever she would team with versus Linda Dallas and whoever else was in that little porno crew.

And

Cat LaRue.

Cat LaRue.

That was right.

Cat LaRue.

That's right.

But nevertheless, that's what we are.

And again, even if it was a guy's War Games, you don't have dinner before you have dinner, right?

You don't take a shower before you take a shower.

You're going to see a War Games match before you see the War Games match, and it's going to be a substandard, smaller, less important,

phonier-looking War Games match because it's a bunch of fucking girls.

In the match beyond, they're building a dome of steel in Atlanta.

It'll rip you from asshole appetite.

The fucking score settling of the Road Warriors and goddamn Dr.

Death Steve Williams and the Horsemen and Dusty Rhodes and Nikita Kaloff and Magnum TA and whatever the fuck.

Well, not Dr.

Death, but yeah.

Doc was in a couple of them.

But not that year, was he?

He was in all.

It was War Games, that point I'm trying to make.

Okay.

These giant behemoths, these fucking badass son of a bitches that were trepidacious at, if nothing else, to get into the most dangerous match ever created.

And here comes fucking 1025-pound women being it first.

Well, you have Bianca in it.

You have Charlotte in it, Becky.

I love Charlotte to death.

I love Rhea Ripley.

I don't want to see Rhea Ripley in the war games.

If women can survive, how dangerous can it be for the men?

You are diluting your goddamn money-drawn gimmick.

It's fucking ridiculous.

I don't expect to see a bunch of goddamn guys doing the uneven parallel bars in the Olympics either, which would kind of, and when they were falling on their head and flying off and breaking their leg, it would still kind of dilute the amazing performance we would get from Nadia Komenichi and Olga Corbett.

So you love her to death, just not the War Games.

Not the War Games.

You don't fucking, you don't book Leonard Bernstein to head the goddamn Led Zeppelin.

It's It's not right.

So they're going to throw a bucket of cold water on the War Games match with the men, the big blow-off, the top talent in the company, by having the girls do it an hour beforehand.

And that's what we found out in the opening segment after Bailey's bunch and Shotzi and Charlotte and Bianca.

talked for nearly 10 minutes and then got into a girl fight and the the heels were five on three so they dumped the baby faces to the floor and the baby faces licked their wounds and turned around and left.

So well, we'll go find some more people.

Good lord.

And that's so they're going to have a war games match and the babyface team is two down and they're trying to find some people by the end of the fucking night.

Which was a show-long story, which paid off at the end.

Yes, it did in a girls' war games match being set up.

Jesus Christ.

See why I don't want to watch wrestling?

Well, I saw the other reason.

I mean, it can't be drinking blood and women's war games.

They're two different things.

Well, maybe if the women would drink the blood of the war games and the men would.

What?

I don't know.

So then the first match on the show.

And by the way, this is what won the night on Fox Network television, by the way.

The brawling brutes against the street prophets, against purely deadly, and a three-team

triple threat, whatever the five.

I invoked the purely dreary, deadly rule and did not watch this, but that was, yeah.

And then they had another fake girl fight in the back because Bailey's bunch was going to beat up all the other women to take away the potential teammates.

And so apparently

the officials were going in the back were telling Bailey's girls, okay, don't

beat up so-and-so anymore, but it's, I guess it's okay if you beat up somebody else.

How can you just be?

All right.

Did you see this program?

I saw things on this program, but I fast-forwarded through, for instance, that three-way tag match.

Oh, how about Dragon Lee versus Axiom?

I thought this was good, and the fans there really seemed to like it.

Once again, they liked another Dragon Lee match.

It looked like the goddamn Mexican Minis having at each other.

Mascarita Sagrada against Mini Vader.

His big opponent was Espectrito.

Well, you do and you'll clean it up.

Axiom.

I know that's a word.

Axiom.

I'm looking in a dictionary now.

Axiom, a self-evident or universally recognized truth, a principle that is accepted as true without proof.

So that means that Axiom is a big bag of bullshit.

He's a hell of a luchador.

He is accepted as true without any proof whatsoever.

Good God.

Maybe he can meet gravity and anti-gravity and they can fucking make more minis.

We were at the nine o'clock hour of SmackDown after what I've just described to you.

And here came Pablo Escobar to the ring for a promo.

And the people now are booing the shit out of him and won't let him talk.

Not as much.

He's good.

Give him his real name, Santos Escobar.

He's been good.

I'll shorten him up to Escobar.

I don't know about this.

Because,

again,

the people are booing him because he turned on Rey Mysterio.

Ray is a beloved individual.

But his story of the thing is never meet your heroes.

And they started what in him.

And he tells a story that his hero was Rey Mysterio, and he patterned himself after him and patterned his career after him.

And Ray was like a father figure.

But after last week, I realized that Dominic was right because I deserved the U.S.

title.

And who got it?

I revived the LWO, and who took it over.

He's right.

Well, but a little bit different,

a little bit different.

Couldn't that have been somewhat of his intention all along?

Is that he knew that

at first he was going to meet and defeat Ray Mysterio to take his goddamn rightful place as the top of the Luchadors.

But then, remember their one match was fucked up and stopped.

And I think the other time Ray beat him.

See, he could have used that.

And then

I was almost ready to be the U.S.

champion and Rey Mysterio wins it.

The same stuff.

But

instead of, he was my hero and my idol and like a father figure to me, I was always better.

I was always, I knew that Ray was breaking down and his time was coming.

And I should have had all this, but one way or another, he weaseled out of it.

Well, finally,

I got him.

I don't know, whatever the fuck.

I like Escobar.

When he speaks Spanish, it sounds like he means it.

I have no idea what he's saying, but he has more conviction than when he's speaking English.

But anyway,

so the last draw was Ray siding with the outsider, Carlito.

over Escobar.

And

the good stuff he did say, he said, I hope, hope, he didn't say, I hope you flatline on the way to the hospital, but he said, Ray, you're in the hospital.

I hope you don't make it.

I hope they have to amputate your leg.

That was great.

And then Zelena came out and argued with Escobar and slapped the shit out of him.

It looked quite stiff.

And then the rest of the LWO were there to comfort her.

And they headed to the ring and argued with Escobar.

And he kicked them out of the ring, said, get out of here.

And when they turned to leave, he attacked them and beat both of them up.

And then Carlito came out and Escobar bailed out.

So now Escobar is a full-fledged heel without a country there.

And the other two

loser world orders are kind of fodder.

And the issue is going to be Carlito.

And again, if this is what they saved Carlito back for when they were going to sign him after the Puerto Rico thing and then they...

Well, they did sign him, but they didn't debut him.

This is good advance forethinking.

But But yeah,

this is all drama.

There's nothing fucking going on.

We really want to see in the ring, but who's on whose side?

And why are they mad at each other?

We know.

The way it went down doesn't make much sense, but I've liked the way Escobar has done.

I like his work here.

The last few months I have.

You have to wonder if Ray's really hurt.

If he's hurt worse than they thought he was.

If maybe things got rushed a little bit or moved around or things didn't happen exactly how they had planned out.

Well, that might be possible, but nevertheless, I have Escobar here, but again,

he's the heel, he's telling the truth.

How's he the heel?

What did he say?

That's a lie.

Well, the thing is, no, but it's the way he's,

I don't have much problem with that.

It's the way that he has interpreted it and the way that it, you know, that he's, it's the context of the thing.

All along, Ray didn't mean to do those things the way they happened.

It wasn't like it was something he he was doing on purpose.

They kept it to where,

you know, you can see where Escobar, and every,

when a baby face turns heel,

they do need to have some kind of

reason or

incident that's legitimate to them.

And then the, well, you heard Lance Russell say it a million times, oh, come on, you're taking it the wrong way, Tojo, or whatever.

It's got to mean something to them.

It's got to be obvious to them.

And other people don't see it that way because it didn't really happen that way, but they take it that way.

That's the bone of contention.

I don't mind that.

You know, I think Escobar and Carlito, if they just get the other two somewhere else, because the group got so fucking big, and those guys are just flunkies anyway.

I think if they keep it with Carlito and Escobar and then Ray can come back at some point,

they'll have something there.

But it's drama.

It's soap opera.

As long as they stay away from the ring and the WWE, they're making a fucking mint.

Speaking of staying away from the ring, Grayson Waller beat Cameron Grimes.

What were you going to say?

Nothing of importance.

Well, that's normal, but I thought I'd give you the opportunity.

Ah, come on.

I'm just grumpy today.

So then Bailey's bunch beat up Zelina in the back.

And then we had the package from Crown Jewel with Cena against Solo.

And

Paul and Solo and Jimmy Uso actually were in the ring already for their promo.

We didn't get the entrance.

I guess they were running late for some reason.

But Paul did, again,

a masterful heel promo.

I don't want to do the whole thing or try to recap it, but

he was building up Solo as the the reason why John Cena isn't here tonight and will never be back.

And

you can thank Solo and you can thank Solo for this bad thing happening, that bad thing happening.

And he says goodbye to John Cena.

And he said, oh, and then he made fun.

He said that this is the time that the music should play and he would come out and he'd beat us all up.

Well, he's not and he's never will because of Solo.

And he had really built the thing up good where you could tell he was about to go home and he was putting solo over and the music interrupted, but it was L.A.

Knight.

And now they're sick of listening to Paul Heyman and they're ready to see L.A.

Knight kick the shit out of him, right?

And so he gets, and he's over,

and he gets a big pop, and he comes out.

And cuts the promo from the entranceway.

The only reason that Roman Reigns is still the champion instead of me is because of the bloodline.

And now the fans are yeahing him like they whatted Austin working with him.

They're not

whatting him or yeah

to throw him off or because they're bored or it's the thing to do.

They're working fucking with him.

And he's got the cadence where it works.

He's smart enough.

He can figure it out.

And basically he says that everybody in the bloodline is going to fucking fall until it's him and Roman.

And And tonight, Jimmy is first.

And he called Heyman MC boss hog.

And as soon as he gets in the ring, they go to the break.

But in this case, yeah, you want to see LA Knight beat up Jimmy U, so I'll sit through the fucking break.

Nine months ago, he was the head of the modeling agency.

You mean to tell me that there is any doubt who the Booker of the Year is when Triple H has turned Max Dupree into L.A.

Knight

and Tony Kahn has turned Edge into Adam Copeland.

And then we come back from the break and they ring the bell for the match and immediately Heyman gets a phone call and he and Solo leave.

And this is because I think

I'm pretty sure that Jimmy's best use as a heel is not quite to the level of Dominic

where they beat him up all the time and they can beat him and,

you know, still fucking

keep heat on him, but the top guys need to beat him up most of the time.

I don't see him as a dominant fucking force.

And I think if Jay's going to be a world beater babyface, Jimmy may be a better chicken shit big mouth heel that gets a lot of comeuppance.

But nevertheless, it was a WWE match.

LA Knight fucking does all of his stuff and then the heel

stops him

and gets some heat.

But LA Knight got more of this match than most of the time because he's L.A.

Knight and they're really pushing him.

And Jimmy was in control briefly

and then LA came back.

Boom, boom, boom.

And

then at that point, here's nothing, but Jimmy, did you notice he blew a spot kind of early?

They recovered from that.

But then at the point where L.A.

Knight started fighting back and started to open up his comeback, he did a DDT and both of them were selling.

And L.A.

apparently had to tell Jimmy the rest of the fucking entire match.

I don't know.

And then

as he was making a comeback, or as L.A.

was making a comeback, Jimmy was still fairly confused.

But they did a complicated back and forth then.

And L.A.

Knight hit to finish one, two, three.

Again, it's

an elementary wrestling match.

If you were a fan of the territories in

pro-wrestling days, you would think this is the most boring show ever and what the fuck is going on here.

But as wrestling exists today, it is the opposite of what AEW is doing, which is everything wrong.

They give you a little bit.

They get you into the personalities.

They're stars.

And then they do a simple angle, a simple finish, and a simple angle, and then they give you a filler for another 45 minutes.

And it's working because the other shit is just caca.

It's a shame there's no

actual real good shit, but

error on the side of safety, apparently.

And then Solo came out and

distracted him, and Jimmy nailed L.A.

Knight, and Solo spiked him, and they started getting heat.

And then here comes Cody, and he makes a save in his suit, and they have a big fight, and the heels powder, and Cody and L.A.

Knight are together in the ring, positioned perfectly.

Cody's already over.

L.A.

Knight's just got there.

Now they're firmly side by side.

And it's simple and easy to understand.

Yes, it is.

So simple, I can't really add too much to what you just said.

And the only thing I'll add to the rest of this show is then at the end of the show, Charlotte and Bianca and Shotzi

got in the ring and they were about to reveal whether they had a partner or not.

And then Bailey's bunch came out and they had a face-off and Becky Lynch jumped in and joined them and they had a big fucking fight.

There you go.

That's the whole two-hour show.

And that's a big deal because remember, everyone, their fans even know that Becky and Charlotte had issues.

It played out one time live on TV.

Yeah.

So it's a big deal to get them together.

For the fans that like WWE Women's Wrestling, it's a big deal.

It's a big deal to the people who like that kind of thing.

It's the kind of thing those people like.

That's right.

Well, that was SmackDown.

And how in the world, when are we going to get ratings?

Well, Jim, we don't have the ratings yet.

It is the weekend and the ratings do not.

Well, I'm working on Sunday.

Why doesn't everybody else?

Well, have a different kind of work.

You have a different kind of work ethic.

You're an extraordinary grumpy person.

I'm an extraordinary worker.

But you know, Jim, perhaps some of the extraordinary workers out there listening to this show want to watch some of this wrestling, but not hear some of this wrestling.

We know a way that they can listen to the finest

snappiest tunes.

They don't want to watch it.

They don't want to listen to it.

I'm not going to tell anybody how to listen to any of this or watch any of it or watch it, but not listen to it.

I don't want anybody to be subjected to stuff like this.

Well, no, no, I was actually speaking about one of our fine sponsors here.

I don't want to do commercials.

I don't want to do commercials.

I want to talk about 15-minute headlocks in 1968.

God damn it.

See, that's what people think.

They think you just want long headlocks.

Yeah.

Because that's what wrestling was.

That's what wrestling was.

Long, wide, deep, whatever the case.

All right.

Well, listen, I could kind of see.

I'll tell you one thing.

The matches that I used to go to when I was a kid, if somebody had been in in a headlock for 15 minutes, people would have been climbing in the ring to cut them to get them out of the fucking ring.

Well, on that note, speaking of cutting people, I can kind of see the mood you're in today, and it doesn't seem like anything's going to really make it any better.

And it also doesn't seem like you watch the entirety of this pay-per-view.

You say you've sworn on it.

It doesn't seem like I believe I fucking plainly and clearly and concisely stated that earlier in the program.

Here's what I suggest.

I've got a warmed-up.

Oh, for heaven's sake.

A warmed up time machine.

Of all the sounds to pick, that's what came up.

I have a warmed-up time machine over here.

Sounds like you have fucking a peptic ulcer.

Well, listen, sir.

What I'm saying is I want you to think about getting into this ulcer.

And together we will fly to a happier time.

And maybe you'll think about the fact that there are a lot of people who really want to hear your views on the two.

Other matches on the pay-per-view.

We still have to talk about the show.

I told you I don't want to, I I knew you were going to try to talk me into talking about this.

Of course, I am.

You know how many people would get upset if we didn't, if I didn't at least try.

Oh,

is a million or so views on YouTube, give or take, and a several hundred thousand listens on podcasts that important to you?

Well, it may be the other way around for this, but

it's not about what's important to me, it's about the obligation to the listener.

They

wait to hear what you think.

You're shaming me now.

I wouldn't say that.

That's not a way I would say.

Mama Cornette would say that she'd call it, she'd say, you're shaming me now.

Well, then I am.

Maybe I am.

What kind of shame is this exactly?

I'm not sure.

All right.

We'll time travel.

The people at home will be unawares of this.

And let me drink a bowl of valium soup and then we'll come back and talk about at least the part of the pay-per-view that I have previously witnessed with my own two eyes and I'm available available to testify against in open court.

All right, so there's a chance.

We are in the future once again here on the Jim Cornet Experience.

Another happy fun day we have going on here right now.

First, we want to give a happy fun message.

We want to say thank you to all of our wonderful sponsors for understanding that some people may be a bit cranky this week, so we'll hear from them again next week.

But we ended yesterday, and we're going to start today in a fun and happy mood.

I don't have to do regular introductions.

Here he is.

You hear him in the background, the warm bear of wrestling, Mr.

Jim Cornett.

I despise you.

Talking to me?

Me?

You, you.

Is there any other?

You got a frog in your pocket?

I didn't know if you were speaking to the whole audience if you were talking to all the people.

No, I'm talking

directly to you.

They can listen if they like, but I'm talking to you.

I loathe you.

What's your problem?

I fart in your general direction.

Your mother smells of elderberry.

Okay, will you stop at the elderberries?

What's wrong?

We are here.

It's another day.

You twisted my arm and my little pinky and everything else for quite a bit of time after we last spoke publicly toward the people, at the people, to the people,

and you made me watch these other two

pay-per-view spectacle matches.

And

now you want to talk about the rest of the shit that we didn't talk about before we time traveled when I was just ready to give up wrestling.

Well, if it makes you feel better, there are more people interested in hearing your review of that event than purchase that event so there's a demand for it well that's not unusual right i'm just explaining there's a demand for jones you should feel oh there's a demand for me i need to deliver more of me you said demand i'm on demand now

i'm on demand now that thing was long

long long long there were children conceived and birthed during the time of that AEW Full Gear pay-per-view.

And now we got to

we are going to...

That's right.

We're going to talk about it.

We're going to review the AEW Full Gear pay-per-view other than the Swerve Hangman match, which we reviewed earlier in the show.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And another day in another dimension.

I know this sounds crazy, and I'm going to say it now.

You're going to hear some chainsaws.

Oh, come on.

No, today they just showed up.

The first time they've ever showed up on a Monday.

They just showed up.

The Chainsaw crew has never come on a Monday.

It's the final end-of-the-season cleanup.

So they're cutting all the branches and everything.

Chainsaws?

Well, for some of the, we have a lot of things.

It's a big property.

I found a lot of fucking trees, too.

I don't need anything chainsawed currently because we haven't had any storm.

Have you had storms?

No, this is the end-of-the-season cleanup where they

have where you're just chainsawing shit at the end of every season.

Don't you keep on a regular basis?

Keep your property fucking up or you've got to come in there with a hazmat crew in November.

No, there's not a chainsaw season.

It just so happens that when they're getting ready to say goodbye until whatever, March or April.

Well, it's time to say goodbye for the summer.

We're taking our chainsaws away.

No more wood.

We'll be cut this summer.

Well, there it is, a double switch.

You were in a bad mood and I was in a good mood.

And I think we've completely changed that now.

Well, if we could talk about chainsaws instead of AEW, no, I'm serious.

if you don't have like a storm or a catastrophe or something do you just have regular shit that needs to be chainsawed around there i keep my property and we went and picked it up with a wheelbarrow the other day there are some trees and things on the property that have a uh specific look to it a defined

very special look so they need some work that has grown enough this year since last november that it needs to be chainsawed yes in one year again this is the last time they're coming here until

botanical science experiment up there.

What can you grow in a year that needs to be chainsawed?

And again, if you're using bone meal, things grow faster.

Bone meal.

Like I said, the different trees and I hate to use the word shrubs, but indeed shrubs as well.

Shrubbery gets chainsawed.

They put a giant tarp on the one part of the lawn where there are no leaves so they could put all the other leaves there.

They're getting ready for this transition of leaves.

As we transition

into another season and, of course, another pay-per-view event.

My guys brought two giant trailer loads off the fucking thing.

They're going to put yours in a fucking tarp.

Well, the first round.

And I've still got more.

Now they've come down.

The oak tree is coming.

The red oak's coming down now.

So

we got that.

We're going to be back out here again

the weekend after next.

Sounds like you need a chainsaw.

You can't chainsaw the leaves.

The red oak is coming down.

Well, let's bring it down.

Oh, for heaven's sake.

All right.

And now I want to talk about the pay-per-view.

Anything to get off your fucking chainsaw, Crit.

Tell Chainsaw Charlie.

I said hello.

Let me ask this question of you.

Was one of the two or three

pretty much most promoted matches with interviews and angles and drama and back and forth, such and such on this thing, the MJF and Samoa Joe versus

the Gunboys, the Ass Boys for the Ring of Honor tag team title.

That was one of the more heavily plugged matches, wasn't it?

I don't know if it was one of the more heavily plugged matches.

It was certainly because it's a part of the

story.

Yeah, it's part of the big key storyline.

And they've been teasing the stuff with MJF and Joe for weeks,

but they've done this before where all the stuff MJF's doing on TV,

it starts in the pre-show for some reason.

Yes.

And that's what it did again with that match was on the pre-show.

They had a four fucking hour, actually, no, I tell a lie, three hours and 56 minutes pay-per-view.

So they put an hour of matches

on before that to burn out the live crowd.

And in the process,

I told you this.

I think your cable said, well, you don't watch this on cable even.

You watch this through the mysticism of streaming.

The bleacher report app.

That way, Warner Brothers Discovery gets a nice cut.

Yeah, well, fuck them.

I want to be comfortable, so I'm on the couch watching the 75-inch, and I got the pay-per-view,

and I bought the pay-per-view and set to record the pay-per-view.

And then that afternoon, for whatever reason,

I can't even remember.

Maybe I checked to see if you had tweeted any clips,

but I saw that it's on the pre-show that matched.

So I go down to see if the pre-show is available.

And

it's two 30-minute blocks on my Spectrum cable pay-per-view titled Countdown.

And it doesn't have any information on what it's counting down to.

And there's a blank

square where the thumbnail should be.

And if you didn't know that you were ordering a pay-per-view or a pre-show to a pay-per-view, it would not tell you in any way.

Not AEW countdown, just countdown.

Just countdown.

It's like the typical, remember the old days, the Barker channel, where they aired a pre-taped,

you know, infomercial for in 30 minutes, you can order this pay-per-view.

And you got that free on the pay-per-view channel, and then it went black if you didn't order the pay-per-view.

And that's what this is still set up like.

And you would never even know it was there if you didn't already know.

that AEW is going to do some kind of pre-show before the show show.

So anyway, I recorded that too.

And wouldn't you know it was on the second half or the second episode of Countdown from 7.30 to 8.

But again,

the world champion and the featured angle that it's on a pre-show.

And wouldn't that be something that if you said it's going to open the pay-per-view, folks, to give MJF plenty of time in the middle, then it would be an attraction for people to buy the fucking show, not the free part.

Not disagreeing with you, but playing devil's advocate.

If the argument is doing this on the pre-show, the way it was done, the way it was a cliffhanger, was done specifically to build late buys for the pay-per-view, do you think that's a reasonable argument?

No, because I think they fucking shoved themselves off the cliff because they told the people

that the...

Champ defending champion in the main event was hurt and he'd just been stretchered out and taken into an ambulance.

So I guess he's off the show.

What the fuck?

How is that a fucking?

They would have had to tell people, but you know, he saw that episode of Raw 25 years ago where Austin went to the hospital, hijacked the ambulance, and came back.

The point is,

they have the match.

They get the heat on MJF.

They give Joe the hot tag and he makes the big comeback.

And then they do their back and forth.

And

there was some tension between Joe and MJF.

That was well done.

This was not a bad match for

telling the story of the angle.

It was very good for that.

I'm just, I question the placement and the whole nine yards of what the fuck they've done this evening.

But MJF and Joe were both excellent, and the guns are,

you know, young.

Well, I guess they're not as young.

They're not like teenagers, but they're very good for their experience level.

Anyway,

but you know, they got to do a little gaga.

So

they hit their finish on Joe.

The guns did.

MJF saved him.

The guns stopped him.

And then Adam Cole's music plays.

And because Adam Cole hobbles out on crutches, the guns are gobsmacked and stand there until Joe comes up behind one of them and chokes him out.

And they win.

But

he's on crutches and he's immobile and he was 100 feet away.

Was there imminent danger that they had to stand there like they'd just seen the creature from the black lagoon?

What's the other option to continue to beat up their opponent?

Yeah, the guy they're actually in the fight with that has two good legs and might come back and choke them out.

I can see how that would have worked out better.

If it was Brock Lesnar coming down the aisleway, I might stand there, oh shit, but he's fucking crippled.

Anyway, so

MJF and Joe shake hands.

And by the way, MJF was wearing the he's our scumbag shirt, but at the proper angle when he was standing there, it looked like he's our cum rag.

I don't know know why I saw that.

So then the guns.

What's wrong with you?

I don't know.

It's,

I think it's the fluoride they've taken out of the water.

The guns jump up and beat up MJF and get the chair and do whatever the fuck and hurt his leg while Adam Cole is standing there helpless.

Because he can't do anything like he couldn't do anything 30 seconds ago because he's crippled.

And

basically, they hurt MJF.

They stretcher him out, and they show him being loaded into a waiting ambulance.

I have not only been loaded into an ambulance by a legitimate ambulance EMT crew that was not smartened up to anything,

but I've seen it also happen in legitimate situations.

Goddamn Kennedy, when he was in Dallas, didn't get loaded into a goddamn ambulance this fast, right?

Because they were running out of time on the pre-show.

But whoosh, it was standing by.

We know somebody's going to get fucked up tonight.

So we've got it with the engine running and boom, and here we go.

So the world heavyweight champion in the main event of the pay-per-view has just been taken to the ambulance on the free show.

And

they end it with him being taken away, yelling at Adam, please don't let them take away my championship.

And you have Adam Cole looking conflicted.

Yes.

Like, what am I going to do about this shit?

So, again, I think for AEW, not justifying it, their thought is this is not only part of the overall storyline, but hopefully, putting it here, we cause someone at home to say, what's going to happen now?

If MJF can't wrestle, what's going to happen in the main event?

But I think most people probably figured he would somehow get back there, don't you think?

Well, yes, because

this is being performed by fans of the attitude era for fans of the attitude era

it's it's a fucking cover band at this point isn't it or a tribute band is like the

rumors of fleetwood mac is you know whatever

so the pay-per-view comes on the air and they recap the ambulance spot

and then they had a women's choir singing for christian cage the heels

the heels again get the singers and the i love to sing about the moon and the June and the spring.

And then we dance and the prance.

And

it's a fucking musical

smorgasbord.

So having said that,

the opening match of this show

was,

in retrospect, the only thing that resembled a wrestling match up and down the card the whole fucking nine yards.

It didn't get in its own way.

You had clear clear heels and baby faces.

You had an issue

even with in that group, even old Nick Plain looks like a, you know, the flunky that he is, so that's fine.

He fits.

He had flair at ringside.

And

Christian Cage is the smartest man in wrestling, I think, at this point, because he can go out there and have

a safe match, at least for him and everybody he cares about.

Darby's on his own.

And it gets over and it makes sense.

And it's a wrestling match and there's star power in it.

And

they went on first so that the rest of these Yahoos couldn't fucking kill the audience for them.

And I think, and the crowd loved it because the baby faces are over.

So

I think this was the match.

And Edge even did the thing where he painted his face like

Sting and Darby like Dusty used to do with the Road Warriors or whatever.

Steve-O from Jackass was at Ringside.

Do you notice WWE gets the celebrities and AEW gets the jackasses?

Did you hear what Steve-O said at the end of the pay-per-view?

I did not.

This event was the most painful thing I've ever done.

I'm not surprised because mental anguish is even worse than physical

excruciality.

So,

you know, that Sting did a little bit, but not,

you know, he didn't kill himself or anything like he shouldn't.

Cage stayed away from Edge as much as possible.

They put the fucking lizard size over.

Darby Allen will take any kind of bump, so we excuse him from,

you know, doing stupid shit, but.

And they kept it moving.

And then, you know, finally,

at one point, Darby made an ice-cold tag to Edge, but people popped because it was Edge.

And everybody did all their shit.

And then Flair and Cage got in a fight at ringside.

And Cage nutshotted Flair

and tried to hit Edge with the belt, but he hit the lizard instead.

And Edge chased Christian out of the fucking picture.

And the babyfaces gave their finishes to Dino.

And Edge pinned him one, two, three.

Again, it made sense.

And

Cage comes away as the

most unharmed heel

on this program because he was neither cheered nor made to look like a complete fucking buffoon.

But your thoughts.

You know, I thought it was actually a really fun match and I agree with you.

It was a good way to open the show.

And even Flair.

I thought he was pretty good at ringside.

The only biggest problem with Flair, beyond, you know, the rapiness and

the bad energy drink and all that,

it's so upsetting the way he dresses now.

I thought he would be a stylish old man.

Yeah, Bockwinkle, right?

Even Buddy Rogers, casual, stylish.

Yeah.

No tie necessarily, but the colored handkerchief hanging out of the bold blazer.

No, now it's like Groucho coming out with the hat with the fuzzy golf balls on.

But Groucho, you have three balls.

Yeah, Groucho, why are you wearing tie-dye?

No, that's the only problem.

I thought thought it was a fun thing.

And also, he's an inexperienced manager.

He stood all night in the neutral corner.

Is it hard to be a manager if you're used to being the center of attention and getting, not getting yourself over, but being over and everything you do gets a reaction?

If you put that person at ringside, is it a hard thing to do to not take away from the match?

Well,

I don't know because I've always been in the other category, but I think it must be because I see a lot of people struggling with it.

And it is, it's a different thing.

It's like, you know,

refereeing is a completely different thing.

Positioning and things you should do and shouldn't do.

And so it's all different things.

And as we've seen, sometimes not all great wrestlers make great managers or,

you know, great promos don't necessarily make great announcers or whatever the case.

But nevertheless.

But he never walked in the Michaels of Kansas City and said, give me the psychedelic cow.

No,

Chick-fil-A on fucking LSD.

Yeah,

the bonanza pattern, please, but in pastels.

I don't know what might have happened.

You know, bae.

Styling and woo!

Ignoring all the mirrors.

There was at one point he might be wearing a shroud at this time.

So let him wear what he wants for heaven's sake.

The shroud of flare coming soon to

Torino, North Carolina.

We're just amusing ourselves now because

those are such deep cuts.

Anyway, maybe somebody will cut a piece of one of Flare suits off and analyze it to see if it's legitimate.

So Jay White came out.

With Tony Schiavone in the entranceway, and they had

awkward interplay, let's say.

And

here is now

what they're doing with the main event.

Help me on this, Brian, if I don't explain it properly.

Tony Schivani says that MJF is injured and he can't defend the AEW title tonight in the main event.

Therefore, the match is canceled.

And Jay White is the new champion by default.

Is that what they initially said?

That's what they said.

And I think it's a smart thing.

I mean, luckily, they haven't done anything with interim championships over the last four years to establish that as the go-to thing when anyone gets hurt.

So it made sense.

Exactly, Groucho.

That has never happened ever when all of these other champions have been.

How many champions have they had get hurt?

And they, okay, well, then this guy is going to wrestle this guy or this girl against this girl.

And the winner will be the interim champion, Punk.

And the goddamn, the girls did it.

But then

Adam Cole's music plays, and he comes out

and he says that not only will he defend MJF's belt for him, but Tony Kahn said it was okay.

So,

delving a little deeper here,

Adam Cole and MJF are the Ring of Honor tag team champions.

But Adam Cole is not medically cleared

to compete in the wrestling ring and defend the title.

So MJF, his good friend, is defending them for him because he's half of the champions.

We've gone that far, right?

Right.

But now

Adam Cole is being allowed by Tony Kahn.

Even though he's not medically cleared to defend the tag team title he actually has, he's good enough to defend a title that he's never had to begin with

while he's on crutches in a fucking cast.

And this is the replacement main event that they tease everybody with.

And by the way, now that he's not actively wrestling, clearly not tanning, he's even growing his beard a little bit.

Oh, good God, he's not washing his hair.

He looks 50.

He doesn't look like a wrestler when he comes out there.

He looks like the wrestler's friend or manager.

And no, hey, fuck you.

I've never went out on TV looking like that.

He's got his hair is dark and

motley or greasy, and it's pulled up at a fucking top knot.

He's got a scraggly, unkempt beard.

It's all dyed.

He was a good-looking young man.

And now he's pale and

unshodden.

And what the fuck?

He looks 50.

That's the thing.

If you know you're going to be at the pay-per-view, even if you're not going to work, I mean, everyone else has one.

Take a shower that morning.

Take a shower.

Get a tan.

I was going to say.

Not take a shower.

Take a shower.

It was just, goddamn.

What did you think of Jay White's reaction to thinking he was going to be the world champion for this bullshit reason?

I didn't care.

And actually, he started talking and I just fast-forwarded out of this.

What else did he say?

Nothing much.

He was just very excited, momentarily, thinking it was going to happen.

And of course, it didn't happen.

And fans at home were told to expect this new main event.

It was Jay White versus a one-legged man.

I mean, the MJF stuff, in a lot of ways, was booked like a dynamite this week.

This week, on this pay-per-view.

Well, if brains were dynamite, they couldn't blow their nose.

And speaking of blowing it even further,

you know, I've got it.

I said the six-man tag was at least

the closest thing on the show to a wrestling match, but I didn't enjoy it more

than everything.

There was one thing that

I have to admit, I enjoyed much more than I thought I would.

The women's three-way?

No.

Oh.

And if I was going to enjoy a women's three-way, it probably wouldn't be these three women.

But for the mascot title, the plumber versus pockets.

The teacher's pet versus the fucking wrestler's regret.

And Moxley finally gets his fucking comeuppance that he's deserved for a long time now with his rotten wrestling and his garbage wrestling-minded ways.

Did you see any of this?

I did because I wanted to see if I was right, and I was right.

Orange Cassidy went over.

Well, but no, but that's not the story.

The story is that Moxley obviously was like, you motherfucker,

at hearing he had to do this, even though he's getting paid a couple million dollars, put the fucking mascot over.

He is the worst wrestler in the world, but he's got a name.

People know him.

He's been a world champion, and he's portrayed as a main event guy here.

And he's got to put over the fucking boss's pet fucking

pet action figure.

And you could tell from the start, he was.

He beat the fuck out of this guy.

He didn't sell shit.

He took bumps, the guy, right back up if he did go down.

If it had been any other

fucking wrestler in the world

beating the idiot up like this, I would have loved it.

But especially

seeing the plumber, because I knew as soon as I saw that, that you were going to be right.

And of course, he still bled.

He still bled.

I don't think fucking Pockets did it to him.

I think he just, hey, no.

It was when they were, he was head-butting pockets.

He busted himself open.

Well, he came out with a big bandage on his head.

yeah

he probably in to avoid the criticism of being seen by god and everybody taking the fucking gimmick to his head he probably bladed in the locker room and news skinned it or whatever

but nevertheless

he went through the motions of selling for the guy a few times but he didn't

and he beat the shit out of the little fucking goof the whole time the except the in a working way most of the time because the strikes in quotation marks in this were some of the phoniest ever.

But it looked like bum fights with the one guy with the fucking blue jeans and the plumber just with that face and physique.

It looked like that,

what was it, a pay-per-view series, or was it a DVD series where they'd get homeless bums to fight for $10 or whatever?

Both.

I think eventually it did get on pay-per-view.

Well, there you go.

But finally,

Moxley got run into the bare turnbuckle that had had the pad taken off of it headfirst, not once, but twice, and then

took six of Roman Reigns' finish, the Superman punches.

Of course, none of them connected, actually.

He whiffed every one of them like he always does with his buggy whip arms.

I think when he jumps up in the air, the wind blows pockets off course.

He's so fucking skinny.

And then Moxley laid down for him one, two, three.

and it couldn't happen to a nicer guy the plumber goes down the drain

what the

oh my god can you imagine how

pissed he was to hear hear that this was going to happen moxley i'm talking about he had to know it was going to happen i knew it was going to happen it was obvious this was going to be the result i mean i didn't know it was going to be like an ultimate warrior randy savage thing where uh savage had to to hit the Warrior with like eight elbows or whatever, or five elbows to pin him.

He just kept punching Moxley over and over.

And

it's the biggest self-fulfilling prophecy in AEW, Orange Cassidy.

And I told you, they're not going to stop until they put the world title on him.

Tony is not going to stop until he gets the world title on Orange Cassidy.

Well, I can't, you know what?

I may buy that pay-per-view twice to see that, just so that

we can see the end of Tony's,

probably not only his company, but also his freedom.

I think he'd, what is it, a 5150 they'd get him on, or is that a drive-by shooting?

I'm not up on all my fucking

police codes, but

some type of involuntary hold

over at the rubber room at the puzzle factory.

Anyway,

I can give you the finish of the AEW women's title between Timeless Tony Storm and Hickaroo Sheeta.

Would you like me to?

You know her name is Hikaru Sheeta.

Why did you call her Hickaroo?

Tony Storm called her Hickaroo the other day, didn't she?

Did she?

I don't know.

I've been watching the Tony Storm.

Well,

there you go.

So

the referee is Aubrey Ed,

right?

And she had her mane colored, I think, for this occasion.

It's a big show.

Well, Sheeta

goes to hit Tony.

They're down on the floor, and Sheeta goes to hit Tony Storm with the kendo stick, but she does the deal where she draws it way back over her head behind her, and she's going to come down with the Paul Bunyan swing.

And old Luther, who

finally, at least he's doing something for his fucking check after four years.

But Luther is supposed to grab the kendo stick, but he misses.

And

Sheeta starts to swing and expects to feel a tug.

And I've been there.

I've been there on this spot.

And she don't feel the tug, and she swings over.

And

before she can stop herself, she does hit Tony Storm right in front of the referee.

And the referee just says, nay, I won't disqualify you.

And then Sheeta turns around and kicks Luther in the balls and beats the shit out of him with the stick.

By the way, I think they ought to get a new sponsor for this program, the people that do goddamn vasectomies.

How many people were violently struck in the goddamn testicles over the course of this five hours of insanity?

Well, I don't know.

I didn't keep counting.

Over and over and over.

So anyway, beat up Luther.

And Tony Storm, did you see the finish of this?

No.

Okay.

Well, then this is what I got on you.

You know, Luther is Tony Storm's butler because she's the old.

of days, golden era of Hollywood movie star, right?

I thought he was Jericho's butler.

No, no, no.

He was Jericho's gopher.

No, that's what I'm saying.

He's Tony Storm's butler.

And

he's the Eric von Stroheim in Sunset Boulevard.

And he's got the tray that is on the, that he carries around Tony's various implements on, right?

And it's a metal tray and it's round.

And

maybe it might be the size of a,

well, not even a 12-inch, in between a 45 RPM and a 33 and a third RPM record, probably about the size of an old 78.

So, Brian, I've narrowed it down for you.

Everybody else is goddamn lost.

It's a metal tray.

While the referee is dealing with Luther getting his shit kicked out of him with his fucking kendo stick, she takes the tray.

And you know, like when the masked man used to put a metal object in his mask to load the head butt,

or a guy that has a glove or an elbow pad

then they use an elbow drop or a punch or whatever they load that what does tony storm use for a finish brian do you remember does she put something on her ass and use her ass as the battering rim she loaded her ass ladies and gentlemen she put the tray and stuffed the butler's tray in the back of her tights but here's the thing She didn't then just run and do it.

They continued wrestling.

And the metal tray started shifting.

And by the time it was 30 seconds had passed, it was sticking out of the bottom of one of the leg holes of her tights.

And then

by the time she goes back in the corner to run and do the Astaface, they've got a camera shot on it.

This thing is barely in her tights.

It's hanging out of her fucking ass cheek.

And she does the Astaface and covers fucking Sheeta.

And Aubrey counts while she's looking at a metal butler's tray sticking out of fucking Tony Storm's ass cheek.

One, two, three.

So that was unique.

Yep, new champion.

New boss.

She's had it before, though, but now she's timeless now.

So she's got it again.

But she needs a pair of fucking tights, apparently, that are assless, not timeless.

Should there be an ass championship in AEW?

If all the women have their asses hanging out, why not give them a belt?

Well, no, I wouldn't mind their ass hanging out, but I hate the fucking gimmick hanging out.

It's like Tommy Young told me when Brute Bernard worked for Crockett in the mid-70s.

Tommy'd started wrestling or started refereeing at that point, right?

And Brute Bernard was the crazy guy.

And he had bald head and ugly face and he was wild.

He said, Tommy said, one night, they're at a fucking show somewhere, and Brute Bernard takes a bump out of the ring, and he sees a board laying there from the ring crew or whatever, like a two-before, about three feet long.

And he picks it up and he sticks it in the back of his tights like he's hiding it behind him, right?

But it's sticking a foot over his head.

And fucking Brute comes back up on the apron as Tommy's going, what the fuck are you doing?

Brute says, don't see it.

It's fucking, it's tall enough you could hang his fucking hat on it.

He wouldn't be able to find it.

I love when Brute Bernard showed up in Memphis, and there's a video of it.

I guess it was before 79, probably 77.

No, it was the summer of 1977, and that video exists because I salvaged it, but go ahead.

Well, just he gets on the mic and is just

screaming at the bus while he's wobbling his legs.

Yes, that's when they painted General Homer Odell, his manager, yellow.

Remember, it was

Arman Hussein and Plowboy Frazier, and they were wrestling, and I think Bold Bold Eagle may have been in there also.

And they were wrestling the angel Frank Morrell and Brute Bernard, and General Homer Odell was the field marshal.

In some way, a bucket of yellow paint was introduced.

I think they were going to paint a yellow stripe down Hussein's back, and the tables were turned, and Odell ended up goddamn covered in yellow paint.

I didn't realize this was one of the tapes that you salvaged.

Well, I kind of salvaged it because here's the thing.

Lawler had saved about 10 or 12 three-quarter-inch tapes of stuff that he had done, and that was on one of those shows.

And I borrowed them from him and

got them dubbed over to VHS in early 1980, probably.

And I don't know if he's still got his masters now, but

the copy floating around for years was from the one that I got.

But nevertheless, should we move on?

Yes.

Yes.

The four-team ladder match with starks and big bill versus the house of blech versus la fuckers and goobers versus ftr

and has there ever been a better tag team than ftr that almost never gets a chance to show how good they are

they're always either with the children or stuck in this multiple team

no rules gaga or the stunt shows.

And

let's face, again, whether it's a four-team match, it's probably not going to be any good.

Then you put 15 ladders out there.

And what it is, is,

again, another match that's phony as fuck and dangerous at the same time.

It makes no sense.

It goes on forever.

There's no semblance of a contest or a conflict between entities or parties.

It's a bunch of...

people cooperating to in turn take moves and bumps that are dangerous.

And I, you know, I just got so bored watching it.

You can't really even say, well, they did this and that, and they started the heat on, and this guy hurt his leg because it doesn't connect from one moment to the next.

It's just over and over, crash, bang, boom.

If I was going to try to notate everything wrong with it from a wrestling standpoint, it would have taken me as long to watch this match as the whole pay-per-view was.

So, but

have FTR now been neutralized and marginalized and neutered?

They were so popular at one point in the team with punk and the matches with Jen and Juice.

And now Starks, who's a heel,

seemed to be the most popular guy in the match.

I think the House of Bleck is in right now an indie-level tag team that could probably do something with a lot of guidance, but not their own.

And, you know, the other team needs needs to find a different line of work.

So.

LFI?

Yes, LaFuckers and Goobers.

You know how they got that name?

How did they get that name?

LFI know.

I see what you did there.

Hold on one second.

Well, thank you, ladies and gentlemen.

Yes.

Tip the waitress, try the veal, or try the waitress and tip the veal.

We don't care what you do.

After about a million sloppy, dangerous bumps on ladders and furniture for no good reason in a match that nobody will remember next week, Starks knocked cash off the ladder and got the belts.

So

again, they even beat FTR when they've got a goddamn microscopic masked Mexican on one of the other teams that could easily be knocked off at last.

That who gives a shit?

Nobody will even recognize him next week he's able if he changes color of his outfit he looks like everybody else

i mean was there anything i missed here with this i don't what the fuck i mean it was a ladder match we've seen a lot of these they don't really stand out that much anymore i think ftr need time off not because of anything other than is there anyone you want to see them wrestle right now no

rather see more of starks and big bill actually right now more than anything else at least they're fresh FTR have kind of exhausted their opponents and exciting things to do until something else happens.

I mean, they've had a good run.

But do you get excited about seeing FTR right now?

Well, no.

And that's,

again, that's the problem.

I would be excited to see a

three out of five fall.

90-minute time limit rematch of that goddamn classic that they had that everybody said was the greatest tag team match they'd ever seen.

But

they've sent Jay off to wrestle for a fucking title that he's not equipped to hold.

And now Juice, they said Juice is hurt, right?

He's injured.

He wasn't on this show.

That's what I heard, yeah.

So I'd be excited for that, but I'd also be excited just to see FTR in regular.

They could have got a tag match.

Out of Starks and Big Bill, a real one, instead of the schmaz they did before when they lost the belts.

They could have maybe got a fucking tag match out of the house of Blech.

But it's always the stunt shows, the furniture,

and nobody's going to remember it.

That's the problem, especially after everything else that goes on in this show.

Plus, no one has any feuds.

I mean,

there are all these great Midnight Express Rock and Roll Express matches, Midnight Express Fantastics matches.

Those are great matches.

But there were feuds behind them.

FTR have great matches.

Have they had a great feud?

And I know the matches with the Briscoes Briscoes are great.

Was that a great feud?

Or was it like, we respect you, so we'll wrestle you again and see who's the best man?

With a different stipulation.

Yeah, and it can't be any more of like, I want you to be the best you've ever been.

No, fuck that.

No more of that shit either.

Well, and there were never any angles.

And part of that was because they couldn't put the Briscoes on TV.

But it wasn't a feud.

It was a trilogy of matches.

But beyond the Briscoes, that's every FTR thing.

Whether it's the Bucs, which took place over several years, Juice and Jay, which just happened.

There's no feuds.

It's like the

we wrestled you and had a great match, so we need to do it again.

That's our feud.

There's no feud.

But you're back to talking about Tony's booking.

Nobody has feuds.

They have matches.

Like, we never, that's the one thing that separates, not the one thing, but when you look at FTR versus like the classic tag teams, Tully and R, Midnight Express, Heart Foundation, whoever gets thrown into the conversation, FTR have never done that.

They've never just had a great feud with anyone other than like a feud based around winning and like just based around the actual match, not like this guy did something to me, I'm going to get him.

Or we did something, we're heels and we do something to someone else.

They're going to want to get us.

It's never done.

And I don't know.

Right now, I mean,

if Jay and Juice isn't going to happen, it's not going to happen for a while.

And I'm not as excited about Jay White right now as I was months ago.

I think FTR, what is there for FTR to do right now that you'd want to see?

Well, and that's the thing is that

nobody in this company has a strong rival.

They had set things up in the past where it would have been Punk and MJF or it would have been Danielson and who, but it gets dropped constantly.

Tony, Tony has never done anything bad to anybody and nobody's ever done anything bad to him because he's too rich.

So he doesn't understand those principles.

Yeah, the biggest feud, if you really think about it, is Swerve versus Hangman.

Well, yeah, and those two idiots, as we now know, wrote that horrible shit on their own.

Because how else can you explain it?

It's totally unlike anything else Tony has done.

And I never thought I'd say this, but that's a good thing.

Well, certainly good for Swerve.

He's getting over.

We'll see about Adam Page, but...

Terrorizing the babies.

That was the four-way tag team ladder match.

All right, how about the three-way girls TBS title match with Blue Sky and Statlander and Julia Hart?

I thought it was a fun little match.

Well, nobody had a butler's tray hanging out of their ass, so I didn't watch it.

But Julia Hart won the title.

I know.

And is it a good move to put the title on her to capitalize on...

What is obviously a growing fan interest in the heel?

Well, I'm the one who said that they ought to put her with somebody that's a real main event talent and have her fucking with that group instead of fiddling around with the house of blechs of sorcery and kind of focus on her.

I don't think she ought to be wrestling because then she looks like the fucking,

you know, same as the rest of the AEW roster, except for Chris Statlander.

She looks like she could hang with the WWE women's roster and is an athlete and a

kick-ass kind of girl.

And she didn't get hired just because she was somebody's friend.

A lot of the other girls, as we know,

especially the ones from the land of the rising sun, had inside connections.

But Julia Hart has a great look,

but I don't see her as a goddamn women's wrestling champion.

At one point, And it's a three-way anyway, so if the guys can't do it, the girls can't do it.

But they looked like three drunk chicks outside a bar at three o'clock in the morning fighting fighting over an uber it was it's just not why make it more difficult when they can't

let them have a good singles match before you try to put this three-way bullshit in on them

i'll say this they put her with the house of black from being a cheerleader and she was kind of in the background she's more over than everyone else in that group Well, yes.

That's why I say get her out of that fucking group and put her with somebody where you could really focus around them.

Anyway,

yeah, Julia stole it, though.

Statlander had tombstone Blue Sky when Julia stole the pen.

Like a heel.

Like a heel should.

Yes.

Well, and she, and she also, she's smarter than the average Stevie Nick's impersonator.

So did you love the big signing, the big announcement?

Well, it was something kind of known it wasn't a big surprise although some people started to think at the last minute it could be Ronda Rousey it could be Mercedes Monet

but most people knew it was going to be Will Osprey

and Tony Schiavone announced it and brought him out

and why

I mean I can understand tweet it graphic Will Ostrich is all elite or whatever

why is this a big deal

it's a I wouldn't say it's a big deal.

It's something, you know, that fans are excited about, but I think Tony's trying to steal, whether it's ratings or buys,

he's trying to steal attention from people by throwing things out there that shouldn't be something you pay to see.

Big announcement, major signing.

What will it be?

Find out on the pay-per-view.

Tony has a big announcement this week.

What will it be?

And then it turns out to be nothing.

They're just trying to hype people up.

They get them excited about what is a product right now that had the least amount of excitement around it than it maybe ever had.

I'm not, I'm, well, go ahead.

I'm sorry.

And I'm going to say Osprey's good.

And I think you

always have fun with him.

But whenever you've watched him, you've actually,

I think you've given pretty fair reviews of some of his stuff.

He's good.

And I think him being in the mix there is good.

He's a much better signing than Akota Ibushi.

Well, I'm not going to say that's not true.

And I have to think if they're going back to Wembley next year, they're going to put the belt on him at Wembley.

That's going to to be my, how do you get him to sign here versus WWE?

We'll put the belt on you in your hometown.

I think that's

you know, we may not be able to pay as much money, but we'll put the belt on you in your hometown.

But

I'm not, and again, I'm not saying they shouldn't sign him.

With the rest of their roster, he fits right in.

But again, they make this,

they just signed fucking Edge and the ratings went down.

and so they bring him out already like it's god as we were signed and then he says oh i'm gonna beg you fans in that thick accent

i'm gonna beg you let me finish up with new japan and then i'll be here for you so they brought him out so he could sign a contract in the ring and then go back to japan for two months or whatever If you've got a plan like that, you want to put the belt on him next August at Wembley,

then

come up with a goddamn plan.

It's like when they started Vader at the Royal Rumble, even though they knew he had to have surgery, then he hurts gorilla, gets suspended.

He's off for three months after working over three weeks.

What the fuck?

That's the first thing that derailed him.

When Ostrich is ready, announce he's signed then.

And instead of bringing him out like he's the biggest, they've just signed John Cena.

Have him do something, make a surprise appearance and make an impact of some description or whatever the case, instead of just bring him out like he's God, because let's face it, they just signed Edge and the ratings went down and Will Ostrich ain't Edge.

And don't just trot him out like, oh, look at another thing we've just got

that may or may not work out.

And then he's gone for however long again.

What the fuck?

I don't understand what Tony is doing.

It's just like, oh, look at the new toy I got.

You don't know the band Sham69, do you?

I certainly don't.

All right.

I was watching this promo he did.

I thought he sounded like Jimmy Percy, the lead singer, but you wouldn't get the reference, I guess.

Jimmy Percy.

How about Percival Pinkerton?

I'm so happy to behead, New Japan.

See, this is going to be another problem.

And I'm sorry if I'm offending any of our fans across the pond.

But that accent, it sounds like a lot of fucking guys on wrestling these days.

And to us untrained ears, they're all kind of alike and it don't come off the best.

I don't know.

I think he actually has a better accent than most because he sounds a little bit more street, a little bit more holgin-ish, as opposed to all the posh.

I mean, Nigel's out here.

He sounds like he needs to blow his nose.

I'm out here on a yacht with Tony Con.

And also, he was wearing a furry winter coat in Los Angeles.

Why was that happening?

He's stylish.

All righty.

Well, I guess we can skip right over that fucking thing we talked about earlier.

Can I ask you one question about the thing we talked about earlier, the Sword and Hangman match?

Considering what it was,

is this where it should have been on the show?

Or should it have, if it was going to be on the show and you can't just say cancel the match, should it have been here?

No.

Make it, don't make it the main event.

Make it a lights out match.

Have your main event, and that way it would have been easier for

the Kookamunga kids and

their match, as well as MJF injured, and maybe you wouldn't have had to go 30 minutes

and then have a lights-out match.

No rules.

We're not responsible.

Because Lord knows most people would want to deny responsibility of that fucking match.

Doesn't that make more sense?

Instead of showing them everything, including a fucking human sacrifice and drinking the blood of a fucking goat or whatever.

And then, oh, and by the way, here's our angle for our main event.

Yeah, I mean, there was no way to follow it.

No matter who you put out there, there was no way to follow this.

I don't think anybody will ever be able to follow it in this company again on any television program or any live event or anything for anybody that saw that.

That's the bigger problem because that may be the reality.

But how many wrestlers are going to now try to one-up this?

Well, but

I mean, they're they're welcome to try because it wasn't good.

It's not like it's good and we got to top it.

It was like there's nothing left to do and it was so phony, it's killed everything.

It's not like the old Roy Shire was chewing out Patterson and Stevens because they had too good of a match and he'd never find another team as good as them.

It was this was goddamn awful, embarrassing, phony.

And it destroyed the illusion of everything you can do to a human being in a fucking wrestling scenario.

You think we ever see the drinking blood spot again?

Or is it now beyond the grossness of it too closely associated with this one specific match in Adam Page?

Oh, I'm sure somebody in AEW will probably try to do it again just because Tony won't tell him no, but you're not going to see it in goddamn the WWE to begin with.

You think Moxley was watching that match like, god damn it, I should have thought him out.

You know what?

And that's another reason I bet he was pissed at night.

God damn it.

How the fuck did I not think of that?

I'm the one talks about eating bones and drinking blood.

What the fuck?

You know what?

Now I bet he was so fucking.

He's like, these motherfuckers,

I got beat by a fucking mascot.

And this fucking millennial cowboy Twat stole my goddamn gimmick.

Holy shit.

Someone else has to ask now to be introduced through the crowd to really blow his mind.

Like, what the fuck?

What are they doing?

You know what they ought to do?

Just to fucking watch him short circuit and be carted off in a goddamn straitjacket.

What's that?

Every wrestler one night should enter through the crowd on the whole show.

Well, we found a way to do a pleasant review of the Swarve Hangman match this time, but we're going to move on.

A couple more matches left on the show.

Twinkle Toes and Jericho against the Kookamunga kids and their

fight over their friendship or lack thereof in Jericho's case.

And

I mean, you know, again, here

Twinkle Toes will cooperate with their cheerleading routines.

Jericho obviously is not going to do a lot of that stuff, but he got more aggressive with them because he's not their friend.

And Kenny tried to get in the middle.

Oh, no,

give Maddie a break or whatever.

And the buckaroos are

healing now.

And I noted, I bet that FTR could have gotten a match out of Jericho and Harpo there.

I'd like to see that to see what might happen.

Olivier makes a couple of his awkward, herky-jerky comebacks and flipped around a little bit and cold-tagged Jericho, and he made a blase comeback.

When he lion-salted both guys, he may have landed awkwardly on somebody.

I don't, yeah, I'm just, I took notes of a few things that happened, but this was just

not only the crowd was burnt,

but this is kind of dreary.

I don't really

obviously ever watch Buckaroos matches, but I don't know what to tell you.

You watch some of these people more often than I do.

Was this a standard example of what they do?

In some ways, yes.

In some ways, no.

I like Omega, obviously, a little bit more than the rest of these people in the match in terms of in the ring and Jericho with the right opponent and the right situation.

There's something there.

The problem is, you know, all the complaints that were leveled at you a few years back by the young Bucks and their friends and people who wanted to be friends with them,

that the business had moved past you.

The business had moved on.

They were the cutting edge.

You weren't cool with them.

You weren't into them.

You were out of touch.

It does seem now like the whole business has kind of moved on and the Bucs are still where they were five years ago, doesn't it?

There's been no evolution other than the changing color of the thinning hair.

There's been no evolution in the Bucs and the crowd reactions are less and less.

They were really bad here because they followed that Swerve hangman match.

I think no matter where this was on the card, you were going to get those reactions.

Kenny Omega is a main eventer.

Kenny Omega's been presented as a main eventer.

Adam Page still gets booed,

but he's in a high-profile thing with Swerve.

They could do anything with the Bucs right now.

No one's going to care.

The only thing they have to do is play on the fact that people think that they're douchebags because they are.

But I don't even think they could successfully do that.

They're teasing the whole heel turn now and they're getting frustrated like Jericho and WCW.

Teasing a heel turn.

They're throwing childish tantrums at Ringside and fucking kicking people into balls.

I think they've more than teased it, but you're right because people don't don't want to see them act like insufferable douchebags because they've come to realize that they really are insufferable douchebags.

Yeah.

And it doesn't work if the fans aren't with you at all.

The Young Bucks lose viewers for their segments.

The Young Bucks merch, which was a big thing years ago, doesn't sell.

The Young Bucks themselves aren't a draw.

So you have a team that makes more money than any other tag team.

And their booking, which they have a large hand in, has been atrocious for years.

and now they're dead.

They got the fans into this by the end of the match because those are AEW fans and they're going to pop for the finishes and everything building up to the finish.

But the Young Bucks right now are dead.

And there's very little that could be done with them at the moment to really change that.

Because the only thing they could do is lean into the whole thing with,

you know, we're...

problem backstage.

We have a camp.

We have a group and we are in our locker room causing drama.

But all it's going to do is remind people of CM Punk.

And that's the last thing you need right now in that company, right?

It's the only thing everyone's going to right away think about CM Punk.

That follows them.

That follows them and Hangman Page into every match.

Not Omega, but the Young Bucks and Adam Page, they've never been the same in those fans' eyes, and I think maybe even in their own heads since the CM Punk incident.

Well, that's because I think that everybody, even I, will admit and everybody realizes that Kenny would never actually intentionally get in a real fight.

So he kind of didn't get any of that on him.

He was a victim of circumstance.

But I wrote on this match just a couple more notes, dragging and a mess at the same time.

Nick kicked Jericho in the balls and went to kick Kenny in the balls, but Kenny saw him, so Matt kicked Kenny in the balls.

That's what everybody was multiple times kicked in the balls.

And

apparently we haven't heard that

anybody has had to go to the hospital for goddamn testicle drainage.

If you're in the back and you have these spots in your head planned out and you've already talked to your opponent, you're going to do these testicle spots, but you see other matches doing it earlier in the show, do you automatically change what you're going to do?

Well, yeah, if you're paying attention, but

I guess they don't care.

Well, if we do it, it's different.

And they will still do dives like baby faces, the oh, pretty dive, but then they'll kick people into balls to be heels.

And then

Jericho ball shot at one of the buckaroos and tagged Kenny.

And then Kenny milked turning on Jericho for some reason.

Like there was no reason for him to do that.

They had had one

miscommunication earlier in the fucking match.

But and then he beat up the Bucs.

And

I wrote, this won't end, more false finishes.

And then Kenny hit Maddie with the one-winged fairy, one, two, three.

And the Bucks roll out and they pitch a tantrum and they throw things at ringside, whatever it was that they were strong enough to pick up.

And

they're petulant children.

But we already know that.

It's not necessarily a...

a good persona to present a wrestler having on television, whether he's a babyface or a heel, but we know that's that's what they are in real life.

It's going to be very interesting, and I apologize for the noise in the back.

It's going to be very interesting because, like I said, the Young Bucks are not what they were a few years ago.

The fans aren't where they were a few years ago.

And they're going to try to do something here.

And it may not take.

It'll be interesting.

Well.

If the, you know, maybe they could start doing this, the old deal where they stand up and turn their back on the fucking heel.

Maybe if the Bucks came out, if everybody in the arena, all 1,742 of them, were to just stand up and turn their backs.

That would be a great atmosphere for them to wrestle in.

Well, they've kind of done that.

Instead of standing and showing their backs, they've dressed as chairs.

And

some people are coming as remote controls.

Well, now, Brian, I guess it's time for the final pert of this thing.

The last pert.

Or to quote my friend Keith Mitchell, the match we've all been waiting for, the last one.

So we talked about it earlier, but let's just recap.

The main event for the world title in AEW, scheduled to be MJF defending against Jay White.

MJF injured earlier in the night, taken to the hospital, bad leg.

Adam Cole has said it's okay.

Tony said it was all right.

I'll defend the title for him.

So

we have got the situation where Adam Cole was injured.

While he and MJF were the tag team champions, MJF is allowed to defend the titles by himself, and

he had just picked another partner to fend the title or to defend the title with,

but at least he still had it.

But now in the past, when the champion got hurt, there was no forfeit.

There was a contenders match for the interim title in AEW, but now they're saying MJF has to forfeit the AEW title because he's hurt and not medically cleared to wrestle.

But Adam Cole, who is not only not medically cleared to wrestle to defend the tag team title he already has, but has also just had surgery and is on crutches and in a cast, is okayed to defend the heavyweight championship that he has never held in the first place in place of the champion who's hurt.

Did I do that right?

Just about, yeah.

Okay.

So Adam Cole, they do entrances.

They do in-ring introductions like it's a real match.

Adam is obviously,

this is not like the old Dusty or even Cody Rhodes.

Ah, he's got a broken forearm.

He's going to put a cast on it and fight through the pain.

It's a motherfucker that cannot step on one foot.

He's literally on crutches at a one-legged man.

And as we mentioned mentioned before, he looks 50 years old with these straggly top-knotted hair and the beard.

And they were taken forever with this thing like it was going to happen.

And people are sitting there like, okay, you know,

we expected something else besides this.

And then the ambulance pulls into the back of the arena.

And MJF is driving it.

And he pulls to a stop and finally figures out how to open the door from the inside.

I'm not sure what was going on there

and got out with one leg wrapped up and limped into the arena where his music played.

And he's limping into the arena with the security and the referees trying to stop him and falling because he can't stand on this leg.

But he gets in the ring and demands to be able to suddenly he's cleared again.

And I'm not even sure, even in the preposterous days of the attitude era, did they go so far as to say, well, Austin's been taken to the hospital and he's not cleared to wrestle tonight?

And then they let him come back in and actually have a 30-minute match, or did he just come back and stunner a few people?

That may be a rhetorical question.

Yeah, I mean, you know what the answer is to that one.

But anyway, so

he, MJF throws a punch at Jay White and falls down and Jay White takes over on his leg.

And I'm thinking, okay, you know,

I even understand what they're trying to do, but how long can they do this, right?

And the guns are at ringside, and they're getting heat on MJF behind the referee's back, and they do it again twice.

And then finally, the third time he catches them, the referee does, and he kicks them out.

And the gun boy's getting kicked out, got some response from the people.

But then it was,

if they had to do this, this whole thing,

then Brian, don't you think, because MJF did put

the psychological spots that he puts in, that he knows the people want to see, that they will get with it no matter what else is going on.

But there was so much time in between each.

And we were expected to believe that

this debilitating injury that he had suffered was still hampering him throughout this whole thing, but they went 30 minutes bell to bell.

And it would be Jay White would get heat on the leg and then MJF would throw the thing in that would get the people, like the kangaroo kick and the nip up, but then he sells the leg.

And Jay White stops him again

and more heat.

And then

MJF takes him out on the floor.

And he's selling the leg the whole time in some degree, but he puts Jay White on the desk for a big spot, and the fucking desk, the announced desk, collapses into pieces under Jay White's weight before they've done anything.

So MJF just puts him on top of the fucking pieces,

and White has to lay there for 25 seconds.

And MJF still goes to the top and drops an elbow off the top

onto the flat floor.

He landed great

for Jay White's sake, but not so much for his own sake.

Why do that?

He shouldn't be risking again his career

for something that nobody's going to remember.

100,000 people are going to buy this or whatever the fuck.

Good God.

And a lot of people have tweeted at me because I, you know, commented at Dax's face.

Well, you jumped off a scaffold

on the biggest show of all time in a bump that we're still talking about after 40 fucking years.

And I was a manager who didn't need to be doing dropkicks and leapfrogs, right?

I don't know what the, and this was way more dangerous today.

Well, the problem too, I mean, he's going to kill his hip.

But

once the table went down, I know you, you know, you probably have a spot in mind, as the gardener does right behind me right now.

You're probably chainsaws.

Well, he doesn't have a chainsaw right now.

He's driving around on some kind of blowing machine.

I used to know a girl like that.

No.

But what MJF,

I don't remember what I'll say now.

I'll say,

you were remembering the blowing machine.

The point is, he's killing his hip.

But if you got a spot like that in mind and something goes awry, modify.

That's what I was trying to say before the blowing machine.

Yes.

And then at one point, Jay White gave MJF a rock bottom off the top rope right on MJF's left shoulder.

And

he would fire back and then White would stop him again.

And then MJF hit a tombstone and sold his leg again.

Both were selling, but it's 20 minutes in.

If you had taken this 30-minute match and put MJF's little teasers that really got the people into a 15-minute match,

You may have had something.

That's what I was trying to say earlier, but it just, it went on.

MJF runs and jumps over the top rope and gives Jay White a cutter

to the floor.

What a move!

I've never seen anything like that before, ever.

Never have either.

It ought to be on television in an angle.

But it's not something that a one-legged man should do.

He ran across the goddamn ring, jumped over the top rope like the Fosbury flop.

And

then why was MJF continuing to hit and slap his bad leg?

Well,

sometimes when you, I've done that before with

my leg and different parts of the body.

If they hurt, like my shoulder, I'll punch my shoulder a little bit.

What?

He was punching his fucking...

Hey, I've had a goddamn couple of bad legs, and I never felt like punching them to add to it.

A little massage, maybe of squeeze, but punching it?

Well, I mean, again, it's punching it in the massaging sense, not to hurt yourself.

There's only one part of my lower body that I want to beat on a regular occasion.

Have you met the blowing machine?

Yeah, yeah, there you go.

She used to live around here.

And he works on MJF's leg more and gets the figure four so Cole can tease throwing the towel in.

But then MGF with a bad leg that he's been taking to the hospital for and couldn't stand on at the start of the match turns the figure four.

And I mean, these things were good, but if we've just, it's been so preposterous the way they got here.

And then Adam Cole has the title belt and he thinks about hitting Jay White with it, but Jay White grabs it while he's thinking and hits MJF with it and gets a two count.

And then MJF kicks Jay White into the referee and Cole puts the ring on the mat and tells MJF to come and get it.

But Jay White gets it.

Didn't we just see this goddamn finish?

Over across the street in the WWE, he put the nucks on the apron.

The wrong guy got him.

And this, he couldn't throw the ring.

Hey, buddy, catch.

He's like, here, come get it with one fucking leg.

What do you want me to do?

I'm on crutches.

And Jay White gets the fucking ring.

But MJF hits Jay White, guess where?

In the fucking nuts.

And gets the ring.

And the guns come in because the referee's still down.

Eddie nails both the guns and then nails Jay White and covers him one, two, three.

30 minutes with one leg.

What'd you think?

I think it picked a hell of a time.

They asked me to get on the mic.

The guy's right outside my window.

What did I think?

You're driving down the road right now and you're a hot rod trying to get away from that question.

I'm trying to think of the blowing machine.

Listen, you know, after the show was over, I heard from several people who had the exact same word that they used to describe the event.

And I think it was the event, but it could have been just the main event or everything leading up to it.

Gardner is the word.

The word

was overbooked.

And

again, you could say it about a lot of things on this show, but

maybe best said about the main event.

And I thought MJF did a great,

I mean, everything he did was great.

That fucking cutter over the rope

was insane.

I mean, I've never seen

the Luchadors do that shit.

No one.

But it also went like a half hour.

And

I also think it was the wrong opponent to try to do this stuff with.

And I'm not saying that Jay White isn't talented in the ring.

But if you're going to do all this shit with MJF, it should be a strong heel.

It shouldn't be

just one of the heels you're trying to get.

They're trying to use this to get Jay White over more as opposed to Jay White being a really over heel feuding with the world champion.

Yes.

And they also haven't realized that at this point, they ought to just see what they could do to get Jay White to get MJF over more for somebody he might draw money with.

But they haven't figured that out either.

And

let me say this this way.

I'll finish your sentence earlier.

Everything MJF did was great,

but much of it was out of place in this context context and situation.

What about that?

I think that's a really good way of putting it.

And again,

some of the elements were almost dynamite-esque in terms of like doing the ambulance angle and him coming back.

Couldn't open the door, but he figured out how to get the sirens on.

I feel like I wouldn't know how to do that.

That'd be the first thing I would try to do, and I would mess that up.

That's very like Monday Night War-esque.

And then it was the 30-minute match.

You know, so many of these matches,

when you think about it, look great in highlight form.

But when you're watching it, it's a 30-minute fucking match.

And again,

I hate to say it, but it was two matches after that swerve match.

Was that a half hour?

That went a while.

Had to be, had to be.

Yeah, I mean, that went a long time, too.

So

I can't say too much else.

I mean, I'm glad MJF kept the belt.

They didn't really do anything with the devil character thing here.

No fake rooms or windows here.

But, you know, I also think AEW did a good job of making everyone forget about Koda Bushi on a bicycle with this event.

My God, that's true.

That was just like four or five days ago, the most embarrassing thing ever seen on wrestling television.

And they've managed to top it several times since then.

Well, there you go.

And there it was.

And there we are.

And where are you?

Well, I'm over here now.

And, you know, we've

gone a while and we decided we.

I will use we because I.

You've got gardeners.

We'll just wrap it up here.

We'll come back on your show in a couple of days.

Do they have any chainsaws scheduled in a couple of days for the drive-through?

This is the end of the.

Usually we only see the chainsaw once a season.

Well, twice.

Usually midway, I'll say come over here and trim this shit.

But

no, and they are in the distance.

So this will probably be the last time the audience hears them in 2023.

We could say goodbye to Julio and the boys.

And we got to say goodbye to the gardeners.

Oh, we'll always forget you.

Or whatever the fuck that is.

Or that's from the best of Peter Brady over there.

All righty.

Anyway, we will be back on the drive-thru in a couple of days.

And on there, we will play some Tony Khan media scrum audio because we're not going to do it today.

Because just like when I actually watched a pay-per-view event, I said, I'm going to bed.

Enough said that.

Oh, oh, but also, did I hear?

Is it was MJF crying?

Crying at the media scrum?

I heard this was said on Twitter.

I saw that said.

I saw some images.

I even saw a video where mid-tier, he took a bite out of his pickle.

So I don't know.

Have those words ever been said in that order before?

And mid-tier, he took a bite out of his pickle.

Well, quite frankly, only on Long Island would you hear those words said.

I have to watch to see if he was working or if he genuinely was overtaken with.

Well, no, no, I don't mean he was legitimately crying, but even if he was working crying, why was he crying?

He was crying, crying.

Maybe he got hit with a really tough question by WrestleJoy.

Well, we'll find out and we'll answer all those questions on the drive-thru and we'll be filled with joy.

And until then, and happy Thanksgiving if you don't hear this until then.

And if you hear it afterwards, I hope you had a happy Thanksgiving.

Merry Christmas coming up.

And if you hear it after then, well, fuck you.

You're way too far behind.

And in parting, thank you, fuck you, and bye-bye, everybody.