Episode 369 - The Order: Part 4

Hello, and welcome to the Lions Led by Donkeys podcast.

Since we last left you, I have been taken down by the feds, not just the FBI, but the Babylonian demons that are at the IRS for taking an extreme amount of cash payments for my printing business.

I argue that what I've done has been completely legal and I have violated no laws.

Despite that, big government sends me down.

On the other side of town, Joe is getting ready for his one last job.

I was inspired because I once swore an oath with my homies in the woods over a white baby that we found in a dumpster.

I took my car into a shop ran by Nate because it turns out when you have a dumpster baby in your car, they vomit and they shit everywhere.

And I needed it to be detailed.

However, he did a very, very bad job and he charged me way too much.

I decided right then and there, this man must be Jewish.

I quickly went on Google to figure out how to build a firebomb.

After many failed attempts and one burnt down garage, I approached slowly towards his detail-legged body shop store to set it ablaze.

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, listen, listen, listen, listen, man.

I gotta, let me just talk to you for a second, okay?

Look, I realized that things things might not be looking so great.

I did the best that I could, okay?

But see, here's the problem: y'all on that woo-healing crystal shit, and you got the breastfed babies, okay?

That stuff doesn't come out.

I told you in advance, it was probably going to need multiple cleanings.

If you got on Similac, it wouldn't be that big of a problem.

You know what I mean?

I can clean that out.

I got a pressure washer and everything.

But y'all are all about that.

Like, I don't even know what it is.

You think Mother Earth shit.

You think you rub dirt in a wound and it heals it or something because it's closer to the healing spirit, right?

Like, yeah, I get it.

We got some weird ass traditions too, but you know, like, you like white babies.

I like white monster.

Uh, I also like some other things that are white, but it's probably gonna make it not gonna help this case here if i talk about diamonds and their various colors so you know what why don't we just have a white monster right now you and me and i'll comp you another cleaning we'll get it done we'll get all that super healthy ass breast milk out of there i know you got your fucking e-girl queen out there in the woods take care of it and we'll just leave it i already had my shop burned down in minnesota that's why i came to washington all right i really really really like insurance thinks i'm shady i am but i'm shady in a different way we can be shady together let's have this white monster monster, please.

It dawns on me that we are recreating the Kendall Jenner police riot commercial, but with a neo-Nazi and a Jewish man over a white monster.

Yeah, I should be doing the Doja Cat apology video wearing a shirt that says hentai.

And once again, all things are healed through the power of white monsters.

Do not fear the white monsters that hide in the woods or underneath your bed.

Take joy in the ones that hide in your fridge.

Fellas, how are we doing?

I'm doing all right.

Yeah,

I'm all right.

I do like, we all need to, you know, join hands and accept that this might be the first podcast that has talked about groups like this one, and none of us could get in.

You know, that's

something nice about that.

I mean, it really depends on how into it.

Cause like in Tom's case, being a foreigner and being a Catholic, but like the Klan got a little bit less weird about that when they decided that Irish people were white because they saw all these cops that were friends with them.

But even then, though, being a foreigner, Nate, I hate to tell you,

Irish does come up in the sales.

They're getting back to some bespoke American racism.

I had a history teacher once who told me that he was teaching a module about the Klan to high school students in like a school somewhere in relatively rural Indiana.

And he had talked about that, you know, if you wanted like the modern incarnation of the Klan post like around World War I to today, they are anti-Jewish, anti-black, anti-foreigner, anti-communist, and anti-Catholic.

And he said after the lesson that a girl came up to him and said, well, we're actually not really anti-Catholic anymore.

But she specifically said, we.

The woke KKK letting in the Catholics.

Oh, don't worry.

If they let in Catholics, they probably still don't let in bisexual people.

So you're still out.

Yeah, exactly.

I mean, like, well, that's the thing, though, is that it doesn't count if it happens in the circle of homies.

But one person the KKK wouldn't let in is one, Mr.

Alan Berg.

I don't think they would.

Yeah.

That's a transition.

Um, Alan Berg was considered a bit of a firebrand by many, contemptuous by others, and a downright nasty asshole by some.

Berg was the host of a morning talk show on KOA radio in Denver, where he spent most of his time rummaging through the daily news in order to ruffle feathers.

His signature style was a brash sort of confrontational act where he would invite guests onto his show or callers onto his phone lines and sort of bait them into heated arguments over literally anything and everything.

He, yeah, he was a troll.

His favorite pastime was to invite controversial guests onto his show, only to lambase them into oblivion with a combination of like rhetorical questions, logical cul-de-sacs, and just like outright accusations of racism and anti-Semitism.

But a bit of his backstory, his careers, which he had many by the age of 50, always involved his, you know, his way with words.

All required a fast lip and smooth delivery, promoting jazz concerts, steering Johns to brothels while he was driving cabs, badgering Chicago criminal court juries, selling shirts and shoes, and finally provoking audiences over his radio talk show, all called upon his polished gift of the gab.

Dusty Sanders, the broadcasting critic for the Rocky Mountain News, described Berg as alternately arrogant, witty, rude, erudite, opinionated, intelligent, and at times just plain nasty.

He would have made a killing in the podcasting world.

Rest in peace, homie.

Oh,

a hundred

I mean, but even then, like, he seems like he's the progenitor of the kind of like shock, jock, drive-time commute guys.

Oh, yeah.

That's exactly what I'm saying.

What's drawing for Alan and the gooch, like those guys.

You know what I mean?

Yeah, real opium

shit.

That's effectively what a lot of podcasters are now.

I mean, like drama YouTubers and stuff.

Like all they're doing is shock jock shit.

trolling, offending, on purpose.

And a lot of podcasts are like hyper-niche talk radio in a lot of ways.

It's like like talk radio, but specifically on like a topic that a general approach wouldn't be able to get advertisers for.

It couldn't be us.

Alan Berg is kind of the, he's kind of like the father to the game.

He's the papa woo of Lions like donkeys.

He was previously a moderately successful criminal lawyer in Chicago in the late 1950s and the early 1960s, but he started to have seizures, which destroyed his confidence and slid the cocky young man into the bottle.

Because of Alan's drinking and infidelity, his wife Judith left him to come home to her parents, a socially prominent Denver couple.

Alan followed, vowing to dry out, which he eventually did.

The couple got back together and went into the shirt and shoe business before Alan immediately began a lengthy affair with a black lady and then left Judith again for a second time.

All right.

So, yeah, he's a real piece of shit.

Not surprising.

The best trolls are normally not nice people.

Like that, that bile is coming from somewhere.

Yeah, yeah.

It's got to come from somewhere.

But his introduction to talk radio came in the autumn of 1975 when a friend on KMGC, a small station in suburban Inglewood, invited Berg to share his microphone to help liven up a limp Sunday afternoon broadcast.

The show started with just chit-chat and the phones were dead as a ghost town.

But Berg, a natural provocado, gradually warmed up and the phones started jingling.

Abortion, religion, birth control.

One sacred cow after another was slaughtered.

And Berg was just offered his own show on the station because he was so good.

The idea that he warmed up makes me think that's that he had to get a little drunk first, or was he still like sober?

No, he's he's he's like lifelong sober at this point, like after being

he's just a born asshole.

He doesn't need to be liquored up to be a dickhead.

But it's also a thing where it's like, if you're a performer, you know how wind people up.

And I think that like, if it's getting a positive response, then you're going to like make a mental note of what works.

By the end, you'll have like a, you know, an elaborate toolkit of ways to piss people off and get their blood up because like that's your job.

Yeah.

I mean, it's like it's like when you're on stage and you say something really fucked up.

And as soon as it leaves your lips, but the crowd loves it, the next thing you say is going to be worse.

Like 100%.

100%.

But after moving in March 1978 to the area's top station, KHOW, Berg honed his caustic style of fending off calls from teens who wanted their rock and roll back.

17 months later, he was fired because the station was sold and they were switching back to kind of more family-orientated content and not this ranting and raving guy saying, like, you know, abortion is good or bad, depending on who was on the other end of the show.

Oh, so he could just go any way he needed to go.

Yeah.

Oh, he is like, I've listened to recordings of his show.

Like, he is a deft master of like not necessarily believing in anything and just saying whatever to get a reaction reaction out of someone.

Respect.

Of his own style, Berg once said, I stick it to the audience and they love it.

They can't stand me, man, but they sneak back and listen because they don't know what I'm going to do next and they want to be there when I do it.

They don't know when I'm going to be funny or serious or blow my career or go off the deep end because I don't know that either.

The uncertainty drives them up the wall.

It excites them.

They don't have much excitement in their lives compared to what goes on in Denver.

I'm damned exciting.

All right.

One afternoon, Berg was baiting the Ku Klux Klan and its leader, Fred Wilkins.

King shit.

Absolute kingship.

This is the local branch of the KKK.

They had sued Denver district attorney Dale Tule.

Wilkins had charged that the DA glossed over allegations that black people and Jews had attacked Denver Klansmen at a Jewish community meetings in the city.

When Berg saw that in the papers, he challenged Wilkins on air to confront him, calling the clan slime.

On Tuesday, November 6th, 1979, a week after he dared Wilkins to take me on, Berg was broadcasting when Wilkins burst into the studio.

The listeners heard over the air, I'm Fred Wilkins, you're going to die.

And then Wilkins just left.

Berg told the police that Wilkins had a gun.

But Wilkins, who was a fireman in the suburbs.

That's the least surprising thing about this, I have to say, as a former fireman myself.

Wilkins was adamant that he only pointed his finger at Berg.

He claimed Berg blew it out of proportion to milk ratings.

And Wilkins was charged with felony menacing, but he and Berg later reached a confidential settlement outside of court, each claiming vindication.

Interesting way for that to end, honestly.

But I mentioned that it's the Denver clan, and another person in our story is also a member of the Denver clan.

David Lane, who is about to come back up.

Oh, boy.

By February 1984, Alan Berg was pulling in one in 10 listeners in the local area to his radio show.

Now, I used to work in commercial radio.

That is a fucking insane number.

Yeah, that's crazy good.

That shit doesn't happen anymore.

Yeah, like one in 10 people who have access to a radio in an area are listening to your show.

He was good.

He was that good.

Days that simply don't exist anymore, you know, being big the radio king.

Another one of Berg's favorite pastimes on air was to bait listeners over his unequivocal support for the financial aid to Israel.

I take back everything good I've said about him.

One caller phoned in and tried to challenge him over his position, saying that the U.S.

government was sending tens of millions of dollars to Israel while over 10 million Americans were unemployment.

She then challenged his recent interview approach with Roderick Elliott, who ran a local farming and rural-focused newspaper, the Primrose and Cattleman's Gazette.

It catered to the more militant fringe of farmers across America and also loved spreading anti-Semitic conspiracy theories.

Huh.

Who would have thought that this would have happened in the crowd of American Boers?

I want to read the Primrose Gazette or whatever it's called.

It's like, why do they keep having showings of you'd Zeus?

Every cover is a different version of like the octopus over the world, but it's flowers and cows.

The Primrose and Katmans Gazette was at this time propagating the theory about Jewish bankers were buying up rural farms.

At this time, particularly in that area, a lot of farms were going bust because they owed so much money to the banks, and therefore, this really, really took hold in rural communities.

It also ran a series on the protocols of the elders of Zion by Francis Farrell, of course, Air Force Colonel called, hold it, the series was called Open Letter to the Goyam.

Oh,

I would just say, as a historical note, in the early 80s, obviously the late 70s, early 80s, you have interest rates went really high.

At one point, they were under Reagan, they were shockingly high.

And I mean, like, like double-digit.

I don't remember the exact numbers.

I wasn't born yet, but having read about this, but like unemployment was really bad in the U.S.

And if you had to refinance or you had mortgages or stuff where like it was adjusted or you had to get a new mortgage, like it was insanely bad for people, people relatively speaking so there was a lot of stuff where people were potentially like cash poor at times um who suddenly couldn't cope with how much more expensive things like their normal debts as part of their business got and so yeah like it was it was it was extremely bad back then and it kind of goes without saying this this idea like oh the jews are buying up all the farmland in color i'm i'm willing to bet the jewish population is infinitesimally small in comparison to everyone else that i it's one of those things like farmers in america are like the most babied fucking industry due to all the various government stipends they get and whatever.

Yeah.

And like the subsidies of their farm, subsidies of their crops, subsidies of whatever.

And the second anything goes wrong, they just absorb every available Hitler particle like they're trying to build the fucking Boer spirit bomb.

Yeah, I mean, I'd also say too that, I mean, small family farms obviously are the first casualties and things like this.

And so like a lot of the stuff too, you have to separate between family farmers and like big conglomerate things.

And that's that's obviously gotten more advanced and severe as time has gone on.

Yeah, I mean, the family farm has all just been subsumed at this point.

But also something I'd point out, too, is like that, that the idea is like, well, bankers might be doing this, but the idea that banker immediately equates to Jewish in your mind is like.

Yeah, you're already there.

Like the Jews aren't taking your farm back.

You have a fucking mortgage.

Yeah, I'm going to say that it wasn't necessarily this that Allen Berg took issue with because, you know, he had this whole thing of like, I defend people's rights to say anything it was more so that in the same paper the marine corps were running recruitment ads that's the least surprising thing about this

yeah jesus uh but to which berg observed rednecks and jew haters make good marines that is a funny line someone had to buy up the ads that rhodesia doesn't exist anymore

after a campaign from a local democratic representative the advertising was pulled and the publication was soon in dire financial straits berg then invited Elliot onto his program for a phone interview under the guise of saying that Elliot's First Amendment rights had been violated.

Soon he started throwing jabs at Elliot, saying he's a liar, and Berg was in good faith defending his right to lie, saying, I tell you what, as long as you lie, I like it open like this because you have no facts.

You have made them up and you have inferred a thought like all fanatics, like John Burchers, like Klansman, like all these folks.

And so the lady on the phone who was arguing that Berg had been unfair to Elliot said that, you know, the financial troubles of farmers was very, very real and Elliot's First Amendment rights had been violated.

Twitch, Berg then responded,

so now you're accusing me of being a liar that I violated Elliott's First Amendment right.

And he continued, and you don't know me very well to know that I wouldn't take a stand that I didn't believe in.

He then immediately hung up on the lady, which was his thing.

He loved to make some rhetorical point and then immediately hang up on people before they could respond.

Yeah, it's a coward's way out.

It's leaving the fucking game before it's over because you're losing.

Yeah.

And then the phones were like ablaze.

Next, he had a Jewish man on air who agreed with the claims of Jews taking over rural farms, to which Berg accused him of being a self-hating Jew, saying, I've never seen a Jew on a farm and you are the most tragic human being.

There's nothing more sickening than a Jew who isn't proud to be a Jew, sir.

And you are the most sickening being being I know on this earth.

Get out of here.

And then hung up.

I've never seen a Jew on the farm, says the Zionist, who's apparently never heard of a kibbutz.

Yeah, I've never seen a Jew on the farm.

They're all spindly guys who work in finance, diamond sales.

Nothing problematic about that.

But all of the advertisers pulled their copy from the Primrose and Cattleman Gazette, and Elliott was forced to close the publication, laying off all of its employees, including one of its security guards, David Lane.

Of course, they had a neo-Nazi security guard.

And this is where Bob Matthews would paint a target on Berg's back.

Around this time, Bob was continuing to recruit with abandon.

Included in the latest sign-ups to Matthews Underground was Richard Scutari, a severe-looking and even more severe-acting martial arts enthusiast who had gotten a black belt in Taekwondo and Aikido, as well as a brown belt in Shori Ryu, Goju Ryu, combined karate studies.

Thank God he never studied anything fucking worthwhile.

He got the Steven Seagal special.

Fuck off with that shit.

Calm down, Goku.

A neo-Nazi martial art enthusiast who refuses to recognize Krav Maga because the Israel invaders.

He missed his true calling because BJJ hadn't had its fucking explosion yet.

He'd be right at home in literally any fucking gym in the Pacific Northwest at this current time.

Oh, man.

I saw it was a, it's not necessarily local to my area, but it's within the general postcode, a BJJ gym like posting about like, oh, the dit only use cash when paying for your lessons because the digital currency is being used to track us and the government to oppress us.

Like, no, bro, you're doing tax bro.

For a sport that doesn't have head injuries, like say like Muay Thai or something or boxing, they have a lot of what you'd consider CTE thought.

Like,

they're doing natural CTE maxing.

And I say that as someone who did BJJ for like 10 fucking years.

I'm just likely to, but that being like a fucking discipline, yeah, like I'm, you know, dialectical studies and advanced Macho Man savagist Benoitist thought.

Macho Manus thought, like, it's like a wrestling Wahhabism.

Oh, my fucking God, dude.

Benoitism is Canadian Wahabism.

But speaking of extensive brain damage, when they first met Scutari, like Scutari was like so paranoid all of the time.

Like he was really like highly strong.

He subjected Matthews to a pseudoscience stress analyzer test to see whether he could trust him or not.

Did he just hook him up to the e-meter that they already had?

Like, it sounded like, from my research, like a mix of like an e-meter and a polygraph.

but like this like skutari really trusted this like so much and like it would become a problem but skutari would eventually become bob's most trusted advisor and the head of security for the organization but the group then began to plan their next job in may 1984 they were stalking out a wells fargo truck depot to monitor the movements of the trucks unfortunately these guys are like lazy so what they did was they got their kids to stake it out because there was a basketball court across from the depot.

So the kids were just shooting like jump shots for hours on end and like riding down when trucks were coming in and out.

This is helpful if every one of your kids is snitch Randy from fucking or Randall from recess, just constantly writing down notes, making a scowl.

We've turned all of our children into touts.

Well, that's like

the handshake between Ulster Protestants and every white American.

But they spent weeks tracking the movements of trucks in and out of the depot, who was driving them, the level of security guarding the deposits, and they formulated a plan.

They were going to hit them on the open road.

But Matthews was busy with a more significant decision, moving on to step five.

Now, we talked about step five in a previous episode.

This is assassinations.

And he set the wheels in motion by getting his most trusted confidant to stake out his most preferred target.

He got Zilla Craig's mother, Jean, to do it.

My most trusted spy, my friend's mom, my mistress's mother, deployed them, the Milfidiyee.

Oh my God.

But yeah, Gene Craig was in love with Bob Matthews as well and also hated her daughter.

So I was like, I want to fuck this man and my daughter is fucking him.

I'm going to go and stake out assassination targets for you because I love you, Robert Matthews.

How about we turn the lights off and just kind of feel around a little bit at the family reunion?

Let's play a game called Whose Tid is it anyway?

I've always had a thing for older women, you know, and also I really liked attack of the 50-foot woman and any woman of normal height is 50 feet tall compared to me.

Oh, I love Bills.

Oh

but it was this decision to pursue step five that caused like huge consternation in the group.

It essentially split the inner circle and like Bob Assuage people be like, oh, you know, we're not going to do it just yet.

You know, we'll just put it on the back burner.

Bruce Pierce and and Gary Yarbrough, two of the most psychopathic people in the group, favored the HID.

An assassination that would show that the right wing was not toothless.

But at one meeting in Boise, Idaho, to which Matthews brought his manila folder stuffed with papers labeled Step Five Intelligence, Randy Dewey and Denver Parmenter were opposed to it.

Bob pulled out the folder's contents and the name at the top was a Morris Dees, the leader of the Southern Poverty Law Center and the Clan Watch Project in Montgomery, Alabama.

an arch nemesis of the Ku Klux Klan.

Dees pioneered the use of civil suits to combat right-wing organizing.

He was also a personal foil of Lewis Beam, the Texas Klansman, who once challenged Dees to a duel in the woods, which Dees refused.

And that was like Matthew saw this as like the ultimate career.

Are we talking pistols at dawn or swords?

Pistols?

Lame.

I mean, look, at the end of the day, shouts out to Dees for knowing that like, this isn't going to be a duel.

This is going to to be a Yellow Wolf music video.

Like, it's just not going to go the way that you think or that you want.

Not fucking Yellow Wolf.

You should never accept the offer to duel someone in the woods.

I feel like that's a solid stance to have because it's not going to go well for you.

If you end up squaring up with a guy who's so psychotic, he has challenged you to a duel in the woods, and you are a lawyer.

It's time for you to not do that.

Yes,

he's basically saying is, don't make me pop the trunk on you.

So, you know, not a good idea.

Do you want to guess who the second option for assassination was?

Al Sharpton.

Alan Berg?

Nope.

Not Alan Berg.

Not Al Sharpton.

Give me a thought.

I'm the case.

Early 90s.

This is the early 90s, right?

80s.

80s.

Okay, we're still in the 80s.

We're still in the 80s.

It's 1984.

It's the early 80s.

They're mad.

Got nothing.

Prince?

Fuck, I don't know.

They hate the Southern Poverty Law Center.

They hate the ACLU.

But it might be funny also.

It might be funny.

So

let's dig down here.

I don't think Andy Kaufman was still alive.

That would be very funny.

What a way for that man to go.

Andy Kaufman going along with Azerbaijan.

I don't think Weird Al Yankovich, who isn't Jewish, but everyone thinks he is, was famous yet.

So I don't know.

I got nothing, honestly.

I'm not sure if they're leaning more towards killing black people or killing Jewish people at this point.

And I can't think of anybody in 1984 who'd be be

raced.

Michael Jackson.

That's a good one.

No.

Okay.

It was creator of All in the Family, Norman Lear.

All right.

Never would have guessed that.

Were they mad at him because he was making Archie Bunker not look good?

That, like, actually.

Yes, that's literally.

That's all in the Family was a woke show.

I mean, All in the Family is an interesting one if you're not familiar with it, because like it's an example of the writers basically trying to skewer every political tendency they could because like Meathead is a dumb sort of like elitist liberal.

Archie is just a gutter racist, like, but he also can, like, is susceptible to reason.

He loves his daughter, but like, he's a prick.

The problem is, is much like Michael Chiklis' character, Vic Mackey in The Shield, the writers intended you to look at Archie Bunker and say, this guy's a racist piece of shit who sucks.

And Americans, as we often do, see a piece of entertainment like this and be like, that guy tells it like it is.

Or in the case of Vic Mackey, that's what cops ought to do, which is kill other cops because they're in fucking IA and fucking run stand.

That's the only good that Michael Chiklis's character did.

In the first episode, he kills another cop, and then, like, by the end of it, he basically runs a spoiler alert for a show that came out right after 9-11.

He basically negotiates a plea deal that fucks over all of his friends, and they all die or go to jail or commit suicide.

Like, he's a horrible piece of shit, but people come away from it be like, Yeah, man, cops, cops just put up with too much lib bullshit, too much political correctness.

It would be great if, like, open in the pilot episode, you know, the lawyers are protecting the pedophile who's holding a chill child hostage.

So, we let Vic Mackey in on on him with a screwdriver, and then fucking he gives it all up.

Like, that's the thing.

Archie Bunker, but insane far-right, people would have probably seen that there were a lot of plot lines in All in the Family that made Archie look stupid, made Lake Racism look stupid.

And then also, Norman Lear went on to make the Jeffersons spin-off from

Samford and so on.

I can see why they would also have problems with those shows, to make a long story short.

I can see why a group of neo-Dazis would hate this guy.

Because people realized that, like, people wanted to see a TV show about his black neighbor, and they're like, oh, it's too woke

but the third name was Alan Berg and the group already knew so much about him because Matthews had deployed his illicit mother-in-law to stake him out for weeks at this stage she had tracked you know where he lived when he left for work when he came home what car he drove his habits they had so much information on him but while they agreed with the need for killing at some point, the embryonic army they were forming was likely to collapse under the heat an assassination would bring on them.

Denver Parlimenter agreed, saying the proposed Aryan Academy training camp should be in operation for at least a year before such a leap was taken.

But Matthews knew Pierce and Yarborough agreed with him.

The propaganda of the deed was a powerful force.

Shortly afterward, Randall Rader, who we talked about in the previous episode, former head of training for the CSA, flew to Spokane.

He had been offered a handsome sum of money to train Matthews' organization in military tactics and maneuvers that he had developed during his time in the CSA.

He also was tasked in the long run with constructing a training facility for all of the incoming recruits that Matthews foresaw.

They immediately started training with pistols and rifles, squad tactics, urban scenarios, and how to silently hike in the woods.

They did this behind Matthew's house at first, which immediately his neighbors were like, yeah, they're firing loads of like fucking rifles up there.

Some shit's happening.

You guys want to play woods ninjas in my backyard?

Trying to think what would be a small enough pistol that he could carry it.

He's running around with a Derringer, but it looks like a bazooka.

He fires it and goes comically flying backwards.

Yeah, Walter PPK is like a crew serve weapon for him.

I just keep thinking though when you talk about Gene Craig doing reconnaissance for him, that you've like special agent side chick's mom.

This is just like,

I realize that this is a thing that's going to seem like this isn't for cheap heat or whatever.

This is true, but like this is white culture.

It reminds me of,

I believe it was party was called the Traditionalist Workers Party,

a small group of absolute idiot neo-Nazis that completely fell apart due to something very, very similar of like someone's wife fucked someone else and their party headquarters is like a double-wide and shit.

They were mostly just posting on the internet, but it was very funny watching it all collapse based on shit like this.

But this, like, like we talked about in the last episode, like Jim Ellison, who was the head of the Covenant Sword and the Arm of the Lord, destroyed his own organization because he went into the woods and divined from God that he could fuck another man's wife.

That's what happens with all of these places in the logative timeliner.

Someone's dick goes somewhere where it's not supposed to be, or they demand that it should go somewhere that's not supposed to be, and everyone else is like, huh, all right, well, it happened again.

We got into a sex cult.

God damn it.

See, that's the thing is if you had a productive outlet for all of the rage and frustration and bitterness and just weirdness that comes along with this, you could get through it.

That's why Fleetwood Max still exists.

But these guys, they didn't have, they couldn't go to the studio and record Mirage or Tango in the Night.

You know what I mean?

Like they had, they were trying to, they, they had too much energy building up that they needed to vent.

It led to fractures, splits.

Yeah, they're just running around in the woods singing, You Can Kill Juice someday.

You can kill you someday.

He certainly hit the high notes.

Tell me lies, tell me sweet little lies.

But most importantly, aside from Raiders, you know, gun training, Scutari would give the men hand-to-hand combat and martial arts lessons.

I love that they're learning like taekwondo, which is fucking so funny.

It's it's it's like taekwondo is combat line dancing.

And I mean, people who are good at it are really good at it, but like to actually use it effectively is a kind of a thing that requires a lot more work than people are going to put into it.

And I also find it very funny that they're not even learning it from someone who could use it effectively.

They're learning it from a guy from like who's got a black belt from like fucking strip mall martial arts academy.

They're called McDojos.

It's wonderful.

80s white people martial arts.

Like, it's extremely bad.

Yeah.

He didn't even train under Count Dante.

He knows nothing.

But on June 14th, Scutari told Raider that they were heading out of town on a big mission and they needed to bring that MAC-10 that Raider had sold Barnhill.

This immediately set off alarm bells in Raider's head, knowing that it would immediately lead back to him because he had purchased the gun legally originally and converted it himself to be a fully automatic.

These people have like a cachet of weapons, and like, no, we're finally gonna do a political assassination.

Bring the one gun that can be traced back to us.

Yep, Raider asked where they were going, and the response was, We're going to Denver.

You know why Bob's heading there?

They're going to kill this big-mouth Jew down there, a talk show host named Berg.

He's been giving our people nothing but trouble.

We're going to make an example of that.

And I cannot say that word.

Yeah.

Raider said nothing.

It begins with a K.

Understood.

If you want to fill in the blank.

It's a Dutch word for love.

But Raider didn't say anything.

It was none of his business and he was staying out of it.

Now, we need to talk about something that happens after this.

And I want to give a trigger warning because it is like in this entire series, we've talked about a lot of very heinous things, but this is actually quite disturbing.

So if you don't want to hear about violence towards women, maybe skip forward a couple of minutes.

Randy Evans and Andy Barnhill were in a small town called Rialto and they checked into a hotel.

Evans wanted to go for some beers and he got chatting to a woman at the bar.

They ended up back in the hotel room and, you know, they started getting a little bit frisky.

Evans put his hand down her pants and realized she was transgender and immediately started to freak out.

He started beating her up and then locked the front door, going for a pistol and saying,

you don't deserve to live.

When he approached her with the handgun, she luckily managed to escape and managed to run out of the motel and got to the police.

The police didn't take her seriously at first, but then realizing that this woman had been beaten up, they decided to investigate.

The officers got to the hotel, burst down the door and dragged the two of them outside.

They found out which truck they had and checking the truck, the officer saw a handgun on the seat.

As one of the officers reached for it, a scuffle broke out.

Evans and Barnhill were quickly handcuffed and under arrest barnhill was charged with unlawful possession of a weapon evans with second degree assault and menacing a search of the truck turned up three loaded handguns inside and evans said to the officer if you're talking about that thing at the motel it's not a girl the officer responded the subject is assault not whether the victim is female or not him and barnhill were charged the police find fake ids They find out that the van they were using was linked to Denver power mentor and Bruce Pierce, who was on the lamb at this stage it connected them to area nations and the police sent out a bulletin saying the suspects were connected to the counterfeiting ring then at 10 past 11 p.m four hours after the bust the message hit the teletype then immediately their phone started ringing off the hook the fbi the secret service the marshall service the atf were all hoping that the madras police in Rialto had captured Bruce Pierce.

And pretty soon, the police had traced Barnhill's one phone call that he got in the prison to Matthews.

The first thing this guy does is call the leader of his terror cell from prison.

The most traceable phone call he could possibly get.

Even back then, yeah, even back then, when like intercept stuff was far more primitive and limited to landline communications, at minimum, the calls would still probably all be recorded.

I think so.

Yeah, I don't know how it works with the law in the U.S., but I'm pretty sure that, yeah, like you've basically assumed that all communication you have when you're in custody is subject to monitoring.

It's all subject to monitored and recording, and I assume it was even back then.

Not to mention the detailed call logs, they would certainly take someone with this kind of rap sheet tangenti connected to various wanted people.

That guy's phone calls were the most monitored they could possibly be.

Yeah, but it's also like, hey,

the old party lines from like fucking like ancient telegraph era.

And it's like, hey, can I be connected to the racism exchange in Medellin Falls?

Yeah, there's on a giant switchboard.

You pull out the wire and you bring it down to the one just labeled the swastika.

I don't know, man.

That's it has a special connection.

The problem is, that's every number in the San Diego area code.

I'm looking down for everything you have for Spokane, and I'm just seeing clan flag swastika, clan flag with swastika.

Which one is it?

Soderquist, who took the call, walked out of the barracks at Matthew's home and told the few men that were there what little he knew, which was only the name of the town where the two were in jail.

Powermenter volunteered to investigate further, driving clear of Ione to use a payphone to call the police station.

All he could get from them that his friends were arrested because of some kind of brawl.

Some of the weapons had been confiscated and there was a question about one man's identity.

By the time Power Mentor returned to Matthews Acres, a mad scramble was on.

Raider believed Matthews' house had been compromised by Barnhill's call.

They had to hide all the illegal weapons.

Dye, Kemp, and Sutherquist helped bury ammo boxes and assault rifles deep in the woods while running relays to and from the house.

Raiders saw Kemp approaching with an M60 machine gun.

Part of me wants to make a joke that, like, maybe you shouldn't have had them name your telephone exchange Laban's Round 65000.

But on the other hand, it's like, how do you have?

I mean, I guess they've got it between the gun sale, trophy gun sales, and shady connections with people in the military and guard and stuff.

That's not that surprising.

But still, like, even back then, like, that weirdly, even with all the gun nut, like, gun fucker stuff in America, like, actually owning real like open-bolt machine guns is pretty difficult.

For people who aren't gun people, like us, that means like the belt-fed machine guns.

What

Rambo carries, I believe in Rambo 2, what Animal Mother is carrying in full metal jacket?

What the warlord in Lord of War asked for, the gun of Rambo.

The gun of Rambo.

Yeah, so the precursor to the modern medium machine gun, the M240 Bravo, yeah, is the M60, also known as the pig, because it makes a sound kind of like grunting.

Yeah,

it's the machine gun that they were using back then in the military.

Well, Nate, to answer your question, a gun dealer in Spokane sold it to Randy Dewey for $3,000.

That's a lot of money in the early 80s.

But it's also super illegal.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

With something that fucking illegal comes with, you know, enhanced costs.

Like, if you were going to buy a shoulder-fired rocket, you could probably find one through a connection at a gun store back then, but it's going to cost a a lot.

Yeah, that's the thing.

That's why the far-left terrorist group in the Clin Eastwood movie Magnum Forest, we all know they were Nepo babies because otherwise how could they have gotten that case of laws?

Classic champagne socialists.

But on June 18th, 1984, it was just like any other day for Alan Berg.

He rummaged through the newspapers to try and find some good material for his show, finding an article that the Pope had said sex for pleasure was sinful.

And he decided that would suffice.

He rolled into the studio around 8 a.m.

and his show started at 9.

And in lieu of finding a stand-in for the Pope, he just began to lash into the Catholic position on copulation.

Around 1 p.m., he finished his show after whipping listeners into a frenzy and capping off with a breezy interview with a local governor who had just written an article for Playboy.

He spent the afternoon meeting with clients, discussing some adverts he was going to cut for them.

And around 5:30 p.m., he met with his ex-wife Judith for a late dinner.

Shortly before 9 p.m., Alan and Judith left the restaurant, briefly stopping to buy dog food and ice cream.

The plan was to arrive home together.

Berg was going to briefly call his mother, and then they were going to head to the home of a mutual friend.

But Berg, tired after his long day, decided to call it a night just as they turned onto his street.

He turned around and decided to drop Judith back to her own car.

Around the corner, a car full of Bob Matthews, Bruce Pierce, and David Lane.

And also allegedly a fourth person because I've gotten this information from the man who wrote the book about this.

There may have have been a fourth person in the car, but he has refused to say he was there.

And I don't want to get sued.

But they couldn't believe what they were seeing.

They had thought they had been made or something must have spooked Berg.

They had relied on Zilla's mother's meticulous notes on Berg's movement, which marked him out as a creature of habit.

They had at this point been waiting for hours for Berg to return home.

But at 9.21 p.m., Alan Berg's black VW Beetle rumbled back up the street and pulled into his drive-wide.

David Lane gunned the stakeout car, blocking in Berg, and Pierce got out of the Plymouth, armed with Randall Raiders' modified Mach 10.

Berg began to step out of his car, lit cigarette in his lips, and immediately spun around hearing movement behind him.

Pierce fired almost a full clip of.45 caliber rounds into Berg at almost point-blank range before a spent cartridge jammed the gun.

Alan Berg almost certainly died before he hit the ground.

When the police arrived, they were shocked by the bloody scene they found.

They were also suspicious of the.45 caliber casings and the fact that only one of Berg's neighbors heard anything describing it like a chain being scraped across the ground.

They concluded this wasn't a simple mugging or a botched carjacking, that this was intended to send a message.

One of the things that's surprising to me is that for all of the tactical training and stuff and training in urban operations and shit, like a very, very, very basic thing that you would do is figure out a count of how many rounds in the clip, how many rounds were fired, and collect up all the brass, especially if you're using a weapon that you know is going to be traceable because it's unique given your supply.

That is a huge oversight right off the bat, because as you pointed out, this is going to lead right back to the legal purchase of this gun before it was modified.

So, to me, like, I know that they're dumb, and that's been established through a bunch of different episodes, but like at this point, like, you've got a silenced weapon, clearly, you've got a getaway car ready to go.

Like, that's just an elementary thing you would do, guys.

Don't forget to leave as much evidence as you can behind.

Don't worry, every single one of us swore an oath on every single cartridge by touching it with our hands and writing our our names on it.

It's got DNA evidence from white baby saliva.

The Denver investigative division chief, Don Mulnix, immediately formed a collaborative task force with the ATF, FBI, and local intelligence to figure out who had carried out such a gruesome act.

That's another thing, too.

That's another thing, too.

Is that like, if the point here is to sow fear, then like, why would you not just, if you're surprising a guy after staking him out, kill him with a normal weapon so they might for a while think that this might was just like a mugging or a random shooting?

You know what I mean?

These guys are dumb as fuck well no the thing is they want they wanted people to know that he had been assassinated yeah but i mean we didn't think this through ho ho is what you can do is like there's things that you can do in situations like this where if they wanted to make a message afterwards and claim responsibility and show proof of it great but like having people know they were involved the first people knowing they were involved being the cops and the people running the trace on their weapon is stupid their legally owned weapon yes yeah the weapon was quickly identified as a mac 10 and during a morning meeting in the following days Detective Dan Malloy from the Intelligence Bureau would tell the gathered officers that he had a possible suspect, nay, a prime suspect, David Lane.

David Lane had made no qualms about publicly speaking about his hatred for Alan Berg and his involvement in Aryan nations.

And now an all-points bulletin on Bruce Pierce was slowly bringing Matthews' organization into focus.

The police characterized Lane as a radical, but not a leader.

They assumed there must be someone else behind this.

It's incredible to me.

I mean, we've kind of laid out for a very long time our opinion of the police and specifically in this series where the cops are very, very stupid.

To get caught this quickly by the cops means you have to be so catastrophically stupid.

Because the thing about it is that when you think about organizations that do things like this, we're not going to discuss the morality of it, but just understanding ones who get away with it or

get away with it longer.

There are ways in which you can get the message across without having immediately blown up who it was and, you know, giving all the evidence for the much heavier armed and manned manned law enforcement of the united states to come after you you know what i mean like just keep it to like local idiot pd guys will probably be fine exactly and it's like you can say oh you know this is the knights of the white knights of the kkk or whomever you can do it just so people know it was a white supremacist killing but like if the goal is take the fight to the enemy you don't want five star gta cop alert immediately following it and then they're at like your like weird boy scout camp in the woods killing everyone you know what i mean like it's not effective by june 29th matthew's army were meeting at a new secret base that Raider had set up deep in the woods.

After three new members had taken the group oath, each of them would be given a security manual by Scutari, which outlined rules for members of the group in order to mitigate security risks.

It included no or limited alcohol, no drugs, no fighting in public unless there was an imminent risk, a complicated switchboard-style phone protocol where coded messages were to be sent to a monitored safe house and then relayed to the relevant parties.

Everything would be on a need-to-know basis.

Unfortunately for all of them, there was one real weak link in their chain of command, Tom Martinez.

Lane had called over to Martinez to drop off bogus money for him to pass.

And at this stage, Martinez had become fearful of Bob after learning about the Allen Berg assassination, but he went along nonetheless.

Now, we spoke previously about the general rules for passing fake money, small purchases, small bills.

But one very common thing that is kind of doesn't need to be said is that don't do it in your own backyard.

Once fake bills got deposited, you'd be long gone.

Martinez immediately ignored that and passed lots of money literally on his own street.

Outstanding.

What a fucking idiot.

He was caught after passing a fake bill in his local corner shop two days in a row.

Yeah, they knew him.

He lived there.

Oh, yeah, him.

The Mexican neo-Nazi.

Yeah, he comes here all the time.

Not only on the second day, he passed a fake bill and it was the cashier was a bit suspicious.

He went back later that day to offer a real $10 bill.

So like, oh, sorry, it was a mix up.

You know, there you go.

The shop owners had already contacted the Secret Service.

Sorry, it was a mix up between this and my fake money that I'm now pretty much admitting that I have on tap.

On the 11th of July, the newspapers would publicly name David Lane as a wanted fugitive and a suspect in the murder of Alan Berg, but it was already too late.

They were on to their next job.

On the 19th of July, it was time for the group to undertake their biggest robbery yet.

They were going to rob a Brinks truck on the open highway in California.

The plan was the same as the others.

Tail the trucks, overtake a caravan of them and slow them down, force the drivers out of the truck and rob the back.

Only this time they had over a dozen men.

And Murky was also dressed up as a woman.

Okay.

I mean, I think he just wanted to get fun with it.

I don't think that was really necessary.

But, you know, I encourage him to be who he wants to be.

Be his true self.

Be your true authentic self, Mr.

Neo-Nazi terrorist.

Using the same tactics as before, you know, the cardboard sign saying get out or die, threatening the security with guns, they managed to get the guards out of the cab.

But the problem was traffic was backing up behind them.

and in front of them.

And this was a big risk for their getaway.

Ran into their number one enemy, California highway traffic.

At one stage, they forgot to engage the emergency brake and the truck was about to roll away.

These guys are so good at their jobs.

My God.

Again, it's one of those things that you have.

How dumb do you have to be to get caught this quick by the police?

And they're still out doing shit like this, robbing armored trucks for the other robberies that they've already committed and haven't been caught for.

Oh, Joe, this isn't that.

That wasn't the stupidest thing they're going to do during this robbery.

Eventually, they forced the guard out of the back of the cab and forced them onto the ground.

And Matthew started to to load out the 30 bags that were filled with cash in the back.

Scutari, after a couple of minutes, warned Matthews that it already ran over their planned five minutes of the raid by two minutes and that traffic was piling up so bad they would have a problem getting away.

So, Matthews, only 15 bags through the 30 split.

They had a total take of $3.8 million.

Damn.

Cash.

And it's real.

It's not that fucked up.

Like, it's not the Tom Martin as money.

It's real money.

Yeah.

That's going to be a a lot.

That's going to buy a lot of oversized white gloves for Matthews.

It was a pretty slapdash escape, and some of the group got separated, but that would not be their biggest mistake.

It will be Matthews' actions that would lead to their downfall.

He dropped a gun in the back of the Brinkstruck, but it wasn't.

any gun.

It was the pistol that Andy Barnhill had bought in his real name.

These guys love leaving evidence behind.

Holy shit.

Guns of all the guns.

I mean, like, surely you would, if you have the amount of guns they've been amassing, you would quarantine ones that have been used on things.

And ones bought legally under your real name.

Like, no, these are the don't do crimes with guns.

We can't bring them out because it's immediately going to make us flash red to the cops at GTA.

Yeah, exactly.

It's like this gun.

It's basically the sword that glows green from the cartoon Hobbit.

Yeah.

And it's like, cool, guys.

That's that's the one you want to leave behind.

It's because Matthews had it like tucked into the back of his jeans, but because because he was so small, they like fell down his pant leg.

All of this training, and they can't buy fucking holsters.

This mistake would cause serious problems within the group, too.

They felt Matthews was running wild and getting sloppy.

The solution was to devolve power to different cells, with groups going out east to supply other groups with cash.

Raider would be buying up weapons and supplies for their training base.

Each man was going to receive a salary of $20,000 per year funded by the loot.

And they were also going to split split across safe houses in the region in order to limit their exposure to potential raids.

But it would be over the next two months, Barnhill's pistol that would lead the authorities' investigation to assemble a list of potential subjects.

They began pulling phone records and figuring out their dead drop system.

Their net was slowly closing in, and an FBI lead in Curtaleen was sure it was going to lead directly to Bob Matthews.

On September 8th, FBI agent Wayne Manus, who for the past year had been assembling a case to try and investigate, you know, Aryan nations and the counterfeiters, like what was going on, tracked down Bruce Pierce, or at least they thought they did.

They found a safe house he had previously been using and found used wooden shooting targets and trees with bullets buried in them.

Bullets that matched those that killed Alan Berg.

Like I said, they just love leaving fucking evidence everywhere, like a scavenger hunt.

It's like you have these guys who are some of the best gunsmiths working in the in the industry certainly within the white power movement But it feels as though you might want to recruit one radicalized forensics expert or someone who understands like I'm sure lots of cops are on your side Could you fucking lurk like this is like you you've invented infrared beacons and done the Hansel and Gretel breadcrumbs with it like this is so obvious like all this is gonna do is it's like cool you brought the fight to the enemy you you killed one shock jock and then you all got fucking completely like you know progenitor of waco turned into ash by every law enforcement agency in the us good job

but despite being under intense surveillance for literal weeks bruce pierce slipped through their fingers simply because despite it being a town of only a thousand people it had two people who owned brown suvs one of them being pierce and one of them being another man and because of cloud cover the surveillance plane lost Bruce Pierce.

Again, these are the idiots that are capturing these guys in like record time.

They were duped by a second car.

Wow.

Yep.

Imagine if they were chasing a suspect with 99 Toyota Corolla with roof racks.

Or a Ford Bronco driving up the highway.

But let's not forget, Matthews is a big nerd.

And by mid-September, he had decided to make a change.

One being the group needed a new name.

Calling it the organization simply wouldn't cut it anymore.

And they would now be called the Bruters Zweigen or the Silent Brotherhood.

Whame.

Say fucking dweeb.

Nate's head is in his hat.

Just dweeb shit, man.

Come on.

But with the new cool name, they also needed memorabilia.

So he tasked Zilla's mother to get some medallions made.

So he falls on medallions, not even like badges, patches.

He goes for medallions.

Lame.

This money rots their brain.

Like, I'm going to talk about it in a sec, but like, these medallions are so lame.

The diagram that Gene Craig brought to like an engraver showed a shield with a Roman cross.

The ancient Saxon word feardung, which was to be inscribed on the cross, the battle axe was faced right with a scroll waving in an arc above the shield,

from which the chain would be mounted.

On the scroll, there were to be Gaelic words.

Oh,

cool.

So said, is Tusumothua Kaha Augustka Kugig, which means ye be my battle axe and my weapons of war.

All right.

Doesn't make a lot of sense.

Also,

it's kind of mixing mythologies here.

So you've got Germanic stuff.

You've got the modern German language.

You've got, you know, like proto-Germanic, Norse, Aryan, whatever the fuck you want to call it.

You've also got Irish, completely different culture.

And you're just like, oh, it's all, it's all, it's all vaguely pan-European whites.

Okay.

So yeah, it's like lower round draft picks for the fucking NBA.

But like, that doesn't really make for a coherent ideology.

You're just describing any American trying to explain what their like ethnicity is, other than saying, like, I'm just like a lot of things.

But this is like this design, and like across the shield, it said, like, Bruder Spiken.

Like, this design is just a tattoo artist, like, nightmare.

Like, this is the shit that like morons bring to their tattoo artists.

It's like, I want this, and I want this, and I want this, and I want this.

But he got 36 of the medals made, and two of them were gold.

One, you know, for Matthews and one for Richard Butler.

Brotherhood of silence or brothers of silence with merch that say brothers Brothers of Silence on them.

Perfect.

But we're about to get to the most stupid part.

More recruits would join by the end of September, namely two new initiates called Black and Norris, who had previously been intercepted by the police in Louisiana in 1981 as part of a right-wing mercenary plot to invade Dominica as mercenaries to depose the then president Mary Eugenia Charles and to restore imprisoned former Prime Minister Patrick Jobs.

Oh, we did an episode on that one.

I didn't know that those guys popped back up again.

It's a crossover episode.

Good to see that he never changed his ways.

But I mentioned earlier that they were notoriously bad with money.

One of those was they wanted to set up a research grant for scientists to look into developing laser weapons to fight the Zog with.

Okay.

They were going to fund

a super villain research firm.

They wanted anti-Jewish space lasers.

Yeah, there you go.

Okay, but on October 1st, Tom Martinez would sit in a Philadelphia courthouse and betray his brothers.

He would agree to comply with the police.

They said Bruder Schweigen, but he didn't schwag.

He refused to schweig.

I will never schweig.

None of my Bruders Schweigen.

I hate it when my Bruders refuse to schweig.

If only you would just schwag more.

All my true hope is schweig.

Schwagen on my Bruders until I talk to the ATF.

Yeah.

She schwag on my order till my Martiness.

I didn't believe in magic until I saw my dog's brooder schwag.

Oh my god.

The following day on October 2nd, Bob's first child with Zilla was born, but it was a girl.

Bob did his best to hide his disappointment, but it was all too apparent to everyone.

I need an air seed.

Reluctant girl dad.

It's very, very bad.

Neo-Nazi girl dad.

I mean, that's a lot of them.

I'm going to be fucking fucking real with you.

Yeah.

Once again, proving they were the stupidest people on the planet.

On October 18th, Gary Yarbrough would spot a U.S.

forestry service truck passing through the land of his safe house.

Paranoid and angry, he shot at them.

This would then trigger a raid on his house.

Honestly, like, I never used to work to the forestry service, but I used to work for the Bureau of Land Management.

And these dudes, like, still exist.

I've worked for the Bureau of Land Management in many years, but it was in the Pacific Northwest at a small town in Oregon, not in Eastern Oregon, mind you, in Southern Oregon.

But like, that was a legitimate worry that we all had is that one of these weirdo forest people would think that we're like the Zog military machine coming to take over their shitty cabin.

They try to fucking kill us because they threaten us constantly.

Hilariously, this is a thing when I was still in the Army doing Robin Sage support because when I was in the SFQ course, like one of the like details they put us on was being role players.

And I remember because a lot of people let the government like use their land for free to do training for the sort of like, you know, fake tactical insertion, create a Guatemala or Nicaraguan Contra-style fucking military.

And one of the things that people who coordinators pointed out to me one time when we were just having a cigarette was that lately in the early 2010s, it was getting a lot harder because the people that normally would be okay with it had gotten like convinced that it was Obama coming to take their guns.

It's like, this is literally the U.S.

Army Special Forces fucking like they all show up in green berets to talk to you.

And yet, so yeah, it's real.

There are people out there who are, but it's very funny when the whole thing is don't draw attention to yourself and and you're like, this car is driving by, time to fucking do a one-man ambush with like, I don't know, like a fucking 30-ot six.

Yeah, but fun fact, Yarbrough got away from this raid by first blending in with FBI agents outside the house and then crawling into the brush and falling asleep after waiting for hours and also pissing himself.

Oh, he got all tuckered out and peed on himself like a giant neo-Nazi baby.

Wait, he got away by throwing an FBI uniform on or just walking out of the house they were raiding.

Like, hey, guys, what's the machine?

Like,

would happen today because all these fucking people dressed the same.

Yeah, it's literally like he, they got misdirected because they spotted someone else in the house and he sprinted for, you know, just like the brush line outside of the house and like laid on the ground for hours on end and eventually had to piss himself and then eventually fell asleep.

And when he woke up the following morning, he got away.

Got all tuckered out, you know, had to make a piss in his pants like a giant neo-Nazi baby.

But we need to talk about what was in the house.

So as the agents sorted and catalogued an alarming array of ordnance in the house, they found cocked Barnett Commando crossbows, two MAC-10s with silencers, pistols, shotguns, assault rifles with thousands of rounds in cases and in clips were found next to camouflage netting, a gas mask, a grappling hook.

Imagine being the guy that gets got by this dude by the crossbow grappling hook combo and not any of the guns.

That would be like, it's like, it's like when you played fucking Team Fortress Classic against each other with crossbows, but in real life.

Yeah, you haven't killed like a ninja guiden villain.

But most importantly, in the attic was a 3x5 portrait of Adolf Hitler draped in black crepe paper with a candle on either side.

Close by the picture was another picture of Jesus Christ.

On the floor was a brown case with a.45 caliber Mach 10.

In addition, there were 75 Atlas electric blasting caps, 25 25 non-electric blasting caps, 99 sticks of gel max dynamite, a one and a half pound block of C4, and 75 feet of safety fuse, and several high-explosive smoke and tear grass grenades.

Honey, did you remember to light the Hitler altar candles today?

Fucking lame.

These dudes are so fucking lame.

Like, I know this is terrifying, and they're super violent and heavily armed, and they have all these explosives, but like at the most basic level, these dudes are lame as fuck.

Also, I wouldn't want to be okay.

Here's the thing: C4 just burns normally if it doesn't have, if it doesn't have like a detonator, but even then, it's flammable.

Dynamite obviously has fuses.

I wouldn't want to be lighting my Hitler candles next to in the attic, next to my stash of all this flammable and/or explosive stuff, plus all the safety fuse.

Like, it's all safety fuse is meant to burn, you know what I mean?

Like, it depends on how it's initiated.

I don't remember the training super well, but I remember putting blasting caps in fucking C4 and putting it on doors to do breaches and training and shit.

Like, yeah, you know, it's it's that stuff's flammable.

It's dangerous.

You don't want to have it.

It's It's a violation of neo-Nazi alter OSHA rules.

Yeah, genuinely speaking, I feel like they need to do a neo-Nazi 15-6 on these guys to figure out where the safety violation started because it's a culture that goes to the top.

We've got to retrain, you know, safety first, safety always.

Hey, guys, safety circle on me.

Firearm safety has one time when the brutes should shrug.

If you swag about safety, you'll swag in the heat of battle.

I'm schweged out.

I'm a schweiger.

Schwag to the maximum.

Schweig took it.

I hate this so much.

But also,

in the house, Yarbrough had every single document he had ever been given, including the security handbook that Scutari gave him, all of the Bruder Schweig, you know, movement documentation.

The agents also found a hoard of information on local law enforcement officers, including computer printouts with their names and addresses, vehicle license plate numbers, photos, and other information.

The SWAT leader who led the raid on the house, his name was first on the list.

They love leaving evidence behind.

They love it.

Two things.

Number one is like, we could have redirected this energy and he could have been a Wikipedia mod, and then none of this would have happened.

That's point number one.

Point number two, I'm just saying that, like, if the cops find this and they find all their personal information and like the house their wives and kids live at and shit, I'm not saying this in support of cops.

I'm just saying that even in the 80s, even before any of this stuff, that is 100% a way that the the cops are like, we're just going to kill this guy.

We like, there is no due process.

You are going to die.

Like, a hundred percent.

Like, you're not doing yourself any favors.

You're like, here are all the cops are doing surveillance on.

It's like, cool.

They're going to surveil looking the other way when they dump infinity rounds into your body.

We're accidentally going to burn your house down with you inside.

Whoops.

Yeah.

I don't know a lot, but I do know American cops.

And this is like, all right, man, you should have been recruiting these guys because they would have probably been on your side, but now you fucked up.

And nowadays, they certainly would be.

Yes.

Yeah.

But they soon regrouped at Raiders' training ground to try and figure out what to do next.

The men were scared, but Matthews assured them that they were smarter than the police.

By mid-November, most of the corps members had gone fully underground.

Bob had some business to attend to first before he disappeared into the wind.

Tom Martinez.

On a flight from Philadelphia, Tom Martinez was scared shitless of what the next 24 hours was to bring.

He was traveling to meet Bob and to discuss what he should do about his sentencing appointment on the 14th of December.

The FBI had been following Tom since he first agreed to cooperate on the 1st of October.

He had handed over every last piece of information he had, and the FBI were hoping to finally grab Matthews.

Matthews picked him up from the airport at 6 p.m.

and was clearly tense.

He was constantly scanning the airport for police, and they left the airport and drove to a nearby hotel with Yarborough in the back seat.

After a brief meal at a nearby diner, where, you know, no, Bob ordered everyone his favorite meal, which was apple pie and milk.

Ugh, it's his favorite meal, like in general.

Yeah, he's it's because he's a cartoon mouse.

Like, that's what a cartoon mouse is.

I feel like a giant wheel of cheese left ever so precariously at the edge of a trap.

It would be far more convenient to get an apple pie and a carton of milk from McDonald's, but it's been infiltrated by the electronic Jew.

It's really hard to drag this pie into the hole in the wall that I call my own.

They have replaced all the working white men in McDonald's with the self-checkout kiosk aka the electronic shoe if bob matthews could have seen my electronic checkout he would have he would have found a zog explanation for it bob matthews like going psycho because he hears you know the the confirmation noise in mcdonald's that

i'm just imagining bob matthews coming back to life and having to hear press one for english press two for spanish he would completely do this all over again he'd immediately commit separate

but they convened in his room around 8 p.m matthews told Tom that he was going to skip his sentencing.

Cooperating with the Zog was going to be his death.

And instead, he was going to link up with David Lane and be part of an assassination team targeting Morristees.

I don't think he's going to do that.

Then Yarbro came up to the room armed with a machine gun equipped with a silencer.

And Tom was terrified of the people he once trusted.

He then leaves his room after some more conversation and goes to his own room, then waits until it's late enough at night, skips out, goes and informs the FBI that we're leaving at 7 a.m.

Bob has organized a morning call for 7 a.m.

He's already rang American Airlines and changed my flight for me.

So, you know, if you're going to move, move.

When Matthews left his room around 8.40 in the morning, he was immediately confronted by the police, but escaped through a series of back streets.

Unfortunately for him, he did get clipped with some buckshot, which like tore open his hand.

It was really easy for him to get away because he just scampered through the tiny holes at the bottom of like fences and walls, squeezed in between the tiny opening between the door and the floor.

And any gap in the wall or baseboards bigger, as big as a pencil, Bob Matthews can get in and out of it.

You need to be aware.

That's why we have cult guns.

You'll never take me alive.

Everyone goes on about the electronic Jew, but no one cares about the Matthews mouse in my wall.

The Aryan mouse constantly chewing on the wires.

Yarborough was apprehended after jumping out of a 15-foot-high window.

Did he bust his legs?

That'd be easy to arrest him.

Yeah, he immediately got caught.

Matthews escaped by running to a nearby petrol station and like covering his bleeding hand with napkins and hitchhiking a ride to a nearby hospital.

I got a, I saw a large piece of cheese that it was really tempting, but unfortunately there was a big metal bar that fell down.

It almost got me.

Meanwhile, Martinez was left in his room for hours on end, frantically dialing the FBI because they had captured Yarbrough and shot Matthews, and they were like all celebrating.

He was like, Yeah, am I safe, guys?

Like, what's going on?

Like, I gave you all this information, and you're not like coming to help me.

But after Matthews regrouped with Scutari and the others, they set about making their last stand on a small island in the Puget Sound, Whidbey Island.

Oh, I have been there.

It's lovely.

Lovely for some.

I have nothing bad to say about Whidbey Island.

It seems nice.

But by November 27th, he was safely settled there.

His hand had been torn by the buckshot, like I said, and Scutari had done his best to dress and clean the wounds.

There's an interesting bit in Flynn and Gerhardt's book where Scutari essentially has to get a knife and cut out large sections of Matthew's hand because the napkins had fused to the wound.

That's going to be nicely infected.

My hand smells like olives.

But by this time, it was clear that Bob had taken up a much more fatalistic tone.

I can imagine why.

In the coming days, Bruce Pierce, Randy Dewey, and the Dominica Mercks, as well as several others, arrived at the safe house.

Bob decided that it was time for them to come out of hiding and to announce themselves to the world.

He drafted the following.

We, the following, being of sound mind and under no duress, do hereby sign this document of our own free will, stating forthrightly and without fear that we declare ourselves to be in full and unrelenting state of war with those forces seeking and consciously promoting the destruction of our faith and our race.

Therefore, for blood, soil, and honor, and for the future of our children and for our king, Jesus Christ, we'll commit ourselves to battle.

Amen.

Subsequently, each member present signed the document.

A few days later, on November 30th, Matthews drafted a declaration of war that could be construed as his suicide note.

It is now a dark and dismal time in the history of our race.

All of us lie in the green graves of our sires, yet in a land of ours we have become dispossessed.

While we allow Mexicans by the legion to invade our soil, we murder our babies in equal numbers.

Were the men of the Alamo only a myth?

Whether by force of arms or force of the groin, the result of this invasion is the same.

Yet our people do not resist.

Our heroes and our cultures have been insulted and downgraded.

The mongrel hordes clamor to sever us from our inheritance, yet our people do not care.

Throughout this land, our children are being coerced into accepting non-whites for their idols, their companions, and worst of all, their mates.

A course which is taking us straight to oblivion, yet our people do not see.

All about us, the land is dying.

Our cities swarm with dusky hordes, the water is rancid, and the air is rank.

Our farms are being seized by usurious leeches, and our people are being forced off the land.

The capitalists and the communists pick gleefully at our bones while the vile, hook-nosed masters of usury orchestrate our destruction.

What is to become of our children in a land such as this, yet still our people sleep?

Invoking the names of three conservative martyrs who had died in the previous years.

To these three kingsmen, we say, Rise, rise from your graves, white brothers, rise and join us.

We go to avenge your deaths.

The Aryan yeomanry is awakening.

A long-forgotten wind is starting to blow.

Do you hear the approaching thunder?

It is that of the awakened Saxon.

War is upon the land, the tyrant's blood will flow.

I mean, it makes sense that he's petting Wes, you know, a glorified suicide letter because he has to know this shit is done.

Like, he's cooked.

Yeah, pretty much.

I guess for me, it's

really uncomfortable hearing this stuff because obviously I'm married to a black woman and have a child.

And I guess the extent to which these guys are so fixated on a very, very weird fantasy racial purity idea, not just in America, but like in human history in general.

I guess it just makes me uncomfortable hearing it because it's like they're stupid and I'm glad they died being as ineffective as possible, but like they were both willing to die for it and recruiting people who were similarly willing to die for it.

And that to me is just, yeah, it's it's it's not really joke fodder, if that makes sense.

Like it's just so fucking weird.

They walked so Stephen Miller could run.

Well, yeah, and also, I mean, you have to understand that like my extended family and the who are from the deep, deep south are not particularly cool with my marriage, for example.

And going home sometimes, like, we have to pick where we go based on whether or not we're going to get a really hostile reaction.

Like, it's still there in America.

I mean, it's always been there.

My parents were in high school when it became legal in every state in America for black people and white people to get married.

But it's just fucking, it's just gross.

It's just gross.

And it's like, it's, it's the same kind of cosplay as their weird European mishmash coat of arms.

You know what I mean?

It has no basis in reality, has no basis in history.

Or the baby oath.

Yeah, it's really weird, man.

These guys are lame and they all die horribly.

So look at the good side.

But this is why, like, seeing the movie and then doing all this research and then watching the movie again, it's like the movie is just propaganda.

Like, it does not capture how deeply evil these people were.

And specifically, how deeply fucking evil Robert Matthews was.

They never do.

They never do.

Yeah.

And how easily, like, that movie, when you clip it up and, like, put it together out of context, makes Matthews look like the hero.

And like that shit is super effective on social media.

But on the 6th of December, one of the largest manhunts in FBI history was coming to its conclusion.

150 agents had swarmed the small island after one of the neighbors had reported suspicious activities to the authorities.

They expropriated the man's house and used it as an observation post, positively IDing members of the group.

On the 7th, at 7 a.m., the FBI surrounded the house and called the telephone inside.

This was their final warning.

After the last few years of standoffs with right-wing militants, this was as much due process as they were willing to offer.

Those inside had been notified and they were to surrender or face the consequences.

Randy Dewey knew there was no escape, so he racked his Uzi for the last time and checked his nine millimeter pistol.

His name was being blasted over the megaphone like a siren song tempting him outside.

Better to die a martyr for the cause than to live like a coward in a prison.

He burst through the door, but only made it about six steps forward before noticing the sea of dark figures among the furs and stopped dead in his tracks.

His resolve disappeared and he dropped his weapons, giving himself up.

Over the next few hours, FBI agents watched as smoke rose out of the chimney stack where the Murkys inside were burning every document they could find.

At 10am, a helicopter gunship was brought in to hover over the building, hoping to intimidate those inside to give up.

It held its position for five minutes, but to no success.

But by quarter past 11, the Murkys dialed the FBI's phone and gave themselves up.

That left only two, Matthews and Murky's stepson, Ian Stewart.

From the observation point to the south of the house, FBI agent Wayne Manus said he feared Matthews had developed a Hitler complex and this was his Berlin bunker.

Inside, Matthews was writing another letter.

We all knew it would be like this, and it would be our own brothers who would first try to destroy our efforts to to save our race and our terminally ill nation.

Why are so many white men eager to destroy their own kind for the benefit of the Jews and the mongrels?

I see three FBI agents hiding behind some trees to the north of the house.

I could have easily killed them.

I had their faces in my sights.

They look like good racial stock, yet all their talents are being given to the government, which is openly trying to mongrelize the very race these agents are a part of.

Why can't they see?

White men killing white men, the Saxon killing the Dane.

When will it end?

The Aryans bane.

I knew last night that today would be the last day of my life.

When I went to bed, I saw all my loved ones so clearly as if they were there with me.

All my memories flashed through my mind.

I knew that my tour of duty was up.

I have been a good soldier, a fearless warrior.

I will die with honor and join my brothers in Valhalla for blood, for soil, for honor, for race and for faith, for the future of my children, for the green graves of my sires.

By 12 p.m., the FBI had used Murky and Dewey to get Matthews on the line.

to try and negotiate his surrender.

Matthews' terms were, I want parts of eastern Washington, Idaho, and Montana set aside as an Aryan homeland where my kinsmen will be free to live as they choose.

So, you know, normal

requests, easily handled by the FBI.

Yeah.

By 11 p.m., Stewart had also surrendered.

Overnight was tense as agents watched the house.

There was no sign of movement and no sign of surrender.

The decision of what to do wasn't really clear.

By midday on the 8th of December, the decision was made to fire canisters of CS gas through the windows.

This also elicited no response from Matthews, who at this point they assumed is wearing a gas mask.

By 2 p.m., the agents entered the house.

A forward action eight-man team entered first, slowly creeping in through the sliding doors at the rear of the house.

Once inside, Matthews immediately began firing a heavy machine gun through the floor of the second story at the agents below, only letting up to reload.

The agents returned fire, and this back and forth lasted about 15 minutes until the FBI was ordered to retreat.

Matthews maintained fire on them as they sprinted for cover.

Next, a chopper flew over the house again, to which Matthews began firing through the roof, then at a squad on the north of the house, and then a squad on the north of the house fired through the walls from the tree line.

Matthews also returned fire at them, but only lasting about 15 seconds.

At this stage, they thought maybe he was dead.

Then he started firing again.

Nobody can fucking hit anything.

Jesus Christ.

Yeah, by 6.30 p.m., the decision was made to end the siege.

They would have to burn Matthews out.

Three Three flares were thrown into the downstairs playroom and a fire truck was stationed nearby in case the blaze got out of control.

But once the fire started, it ripped through the house.

There was no sign of Matthews.

Gunshots started popping off from all directions in the house.

The heat from the fire was igniting all of the ammunition that was stored upstairs.

20 minutes later, the roof collapsed and the fire intensified.

There was no sign of Matthews.

The siege was over.

Good.

I'm glad he died the worst way possible.

Fucking piece of shit.

An FBI spokesman later announced to the reporters the tragic end to the siege, adding that the fire was not started intentionally, although indeed, as a result of a calculated risk, it had been started knowingly.

By Sunday morning, around 8am, the debris had cooled enough for agents to start sifting through the evidence.

Along one side of the burnt-out house, a blackened bathtub had fallen from the second floor and rested at a tilted angle against the heater.

Next to it, appeared dumped out of the tub.

The searchers found the badly burned remains of a human body.

Embedded in his chest cavity was a piece of molten gold.

It was Matthew's Bruder Schweigen medallion.

The end.

I love that he is in his dying moments, he crawled into the tub for safety and died.

What a piece of shit.

I'm glad.

So I'm glad that he burned to death.

Bury me with my affiliated merch.

Bury me with this mercher upon it.

Like as a little bit of a post script, like most of the members were caught over the next year.

And like this went on to inspire like everything that would happen over the next next like 10 to 15 years.

You know, Ruby Rage, Waco, fucking Elohim City, like all of this stuff would be inspired by, and also the Oklahoma City bombing.

And more Nazis need to be burned to death.

How are we feeling now that Bob Matthews is dead and out of our lives?

R.I.P.

Nazi Mickey Mouse, you fucking piece of shit.

Yeah, I mean, I'm happy to retire the voice.

Can I do a little quick aside here?

Yeah, go on.

So years ago, you may remember that with their ironclad commitment to free speech and ideological diversity, Reddit refused to intervene when a subreddit basically became the biggest and most popular white supremacist destination on the internet, like more traffic on a constant basis than Stormfront even had at the time.

And it was more like, if either like, oh, we'll quarantine it or whatever, but we can't, we have free speech won't let us get rid of it.

And it was really bad.

They finally became so embarrassing they did get rid of it.

But I looked at some of the stuff these guys were posting and it was amazing to me because they were falling for obvious Photoshops and just genuinely trying to find ways to ruin their own day with like the to not to make light of it, but the drill tweet about imagining a restaurant that discriminates against non-chuck owners and ruining my own afternoon.

Like that kind of thing, but like put, you know, writ large.

But they described cities in America like the way Cormac McCarthy describes cities in the road, that it was like, you know, these hellscape war zones.

And I remember because I was in the process of dealing with some admin thing where some documents had gotten, the only place they could retrieve them was from this FedEx depot in like really far south Brooklyn.

And I had to take the bus down Utica Avenue, which that area of Brooklyn is even maybe still to this day, but gentrification hadn't pushed in at all.

I was the only white person on the bus.

And no one, no one cared.

No one, it was just a busy bus rush hour in the city, you know, fine.

But, you know, I'm not an idiot.

I know the score of getting around.

No one cared.

No one cared at all.

And that thought crossed my mind, seeing that this ideology, all the stuff these guys were getting so bent out of shape about, versus like, I know, and my wife can tell plenty of stories this growing up, that in a reverse situation of a place that working class and white, a soul black person would have a much harder time than a soul white person would have.

You know what I mean?

And it's one of those things where it's like, okay, lots of American shit goes into why that is.

But the hollowness, the stupidity, the absolute like self-delusion of it was so, like, it was hard to find a better example in my mind of how contrasting what these guys were saying and believing ostensibly was versus what I was seeing in real life.

And you're like, you're just a bunch of weird, self-victimizing freaks.

This is embarrassing and pathetic.

And like guys talking about like, oh, I'm slowly grinding down my coworkers to get them red pilled.

It's like, man, shut the fuck up.

You're such losers.

And my wife's the smartest person I've ever met.

She's way smarter than me.

Anyone who knows me and her will be like, no,

there's no pull of test involved here.

She is smarter than you.

It's true.

And I guess to me, it's like seeing how willing these people are to just like completely invert and contort anything and everything they find to create this impression of like, you know, paradise lost, like lost golden age delusions about like whiteness.

Like it's, it's just not real.

Even

for a reality that never existed.

Even the concept of whiteness isn't real.

And if you go back to this imagined time, they wouldn't have thought of it the same way that you do now because it's a modern thing.

It's completely anachronistic.

Some of it's more racist.

Some of it's less racist.

Some of your imagined fucking Aryan purity in places where people weren't actually Aryan, there were lots of people who weren't white as you would define it now because it didn't exist.

Like, it's just, it's, it's embarrassing.

That's why most of them should be set on fire.

That's why

a lot of the brooders need to be schweigen.

Yeah, they should actually, they need to schweig, but they schweig in a different way.

They need to schweig the fuck fuck up.

That actually does kind of make sense.

It's like be silent.

Don't

talk about it.

Don't post about it.

Just be

an unhappy dork on your own.

Don't go outside.

Don't talk to your contemporaries on the internet.

Get addicted to something like very destructive and then just die alone and miserable.

So you don't take people down with you.

Yeah, you should just fall victim to the democracy of the rope or the bullet.

Or grow up and not be a fucking loser.

And I guess to me, that's the thing, right?

That to me, I've never flirted with this stuff.

I've never believed any of this stuff.

I've never, it's never had any appeal whatsoever.

I've had coworkers in fast food, for example, who were into this shit.

And I was just like, and when it was older people tried to like influence teens, I'm like, there's, this is creepy in a bunch of ways.

I hate, I've always hated this stuff.

It's always been so incredibly false.

And I guess to me, hearing about this and seeing that people saw this and said, I'm inspired to continue Bob Matthews' fight, what a fucking embarrassment, man.

Yeah, I'm sure people didn't see the chopped-up versions of the film on social media and like, oh, this is bass.

This is one thing I do have to say, and this is, this is true, is that like, I do think one thing that I find very uncomfortable that I would point this out, but this is very true.

Another thing, around not too long before this, one time I remember wondering what it was there was a reference to it was music being played in Schindler's List, and they hadn't cracked down on as much of like the right DRM sort of, you know, fucking IP stuff on YouTube.

And someone had a cut of the scene in when they are liquidating the ghetto in Krakow, where they're machine gunning people, and a soldier is playing Bach on the piano.

And this is supposed to be horrific, right?

It's violent and scary

and visceral and really, really, really traumatic to watch.

And one of the comments was like, exterminating Jews and playing European music.

This is the best cinema's ever been.

Paraphrase the internet.

Para paraphrasing.

But you see what I mean is that, like, no matter what, people are going to interpret stuff.

And I feel like there's a degree to which, like, it's very hard to not valorize it in some way.

And I appreciate the work you've done, Tom, to point out not just the history and the grossness and the violence and

the cruelty, but also the utter pathetic loserdom.

Yeah, they're all just fucking like nerds and losers.

And the medallions are like the perfect example of it.

It's like they're not pulling from any sort of real historiography.

They're like mishmashing like imagined shit that like existed hundreds of years apart or thousands of kilometers apart into this like one thing to justify their own bigotry because of like their own inadequacy.

You know, like Robert Matthews became this way because he was scared of the Cold War.

Like, when he was 11, he was afraid of the Cold War and he saw an article from the John Birch Society and that assuaged his fears.

This is, you know, it's an ideology of fear that, like, you know, you were afraid of the world.

That's what all this is mostly couched in.

But I do have to say, Tom, you did a fantastic job.

Yeah, man, this is great.

Thank you.

I am very happy to not have all this like super racist material on my computer anymore.

Yep.

Yep.

But fellas, we do a thing called questions from the Legion.

If you'd like to ask us a question, you can sign up on Patreon, join the Discord, we have a dedicated channel for it, or ask us on Patreon.

Today's question is: if you grew up poor, rural, or dirtbag enough, you would always have a guy you trust to fix your car or other mechanical skills who will do it for a pack of cigarettes or a sixer of beer, has amazing stories that are also mostly lies, but may not be shared because they do meth and live in an RV or shed.

Who Who was that guy for you?

My brother's friend, who I will not name.

He was the general handyman around the house and

also drug dealer, mechanic.

I believe he babysitted us for a period of time.

Shouts out.

You know who you are if you're listening.

When I lived in Bloomington, you know, I was a college student, but I had to work fast food because ROTC stipend only covered my rent.

So if I had any money at all to anything I needed in life, like groceries, I had to work.

So I worked at Stake and Shake.

And through working at Stake and Shake and through a friend of mine, I encountered a guy who I don't even know what his real name was.

We just called him Shady Mike.

And Shady Mike had two things.

The weirdest, stupidest stories about drugs you could possibly imagine.

Probably true, but who knows.

But also, if you had a problem with your car, Shady Mike either had the tools or

he knew someone who knew how to fix it.

Or like even something so small is just like, Shady Mike never had anything going on in his life.

So, like, if your car was dead, he'd come and jumpstart you.

And also, he had a lot of digs on which, which section of which college class to take would be the easiest because he'd fucking failed so many courses.

So,

yeah, shouts out to Shady Mike.

I don't even think his real name was Mike, but that's just what we called him.

I used to work with a chef who I actually can't say too many details about his personal life because he could, he could definitely find it.

And he is also a psychopath, but like he'd be there, like absolutely jacked to the tits on caffeine, would have like two coffees as soon as he came in, then a monster, then a red bull, then another monster, wouldn't eat until like 4 p.m.

in the day, and then would immediately go out and smoke a joint and then drive home.

And he'd be like, oh yeah, bro,

do you want to buy a bed frame?

Do you want to buy a new car?

It was like always that shit.

And it's just like, I never trusted anything to buy off of, but it was like, that is just that guy who's like a real wheeler dealer.

He's like, do you want to buy a bed frame?

Do you want to buy a bike?

I got a guy.

Oh, yeah.

They make the world go round.

But that is a series.

Yeah.

You two host other shows.

I do not.

You've already listened to the show.

And if this is your first time tuning in, you're in for a surprise later.

But you host other shows.

Plug your other shows.

Trash Future, What a Hell of a Way to Dad, Kill James Bond, No Gods, No Mayors.

I am involved in some way or form of those, but for Hell of a Way and Trash Future, I am a co-host.

So if you want to hear me talk, and they're all out there on free and paid stuff.

So if you like them, you can subscribe and, you know, you get more content.

But thank you for listening to this.

This isn't, we just gave color commentary.

Tom did all the work and this is, this has been great, if a bit distressing.

So yeah, I'll hand it over to Tom, who is the host, the host of this show for the last four episodes.

The host and the bane of my life for the past like three months.

Beneath Skin, show about the history of everything told through the history of tattooing.

I also have a photography book out.

If you go to beneath the skin shop.com, you can get that.

There's some cool collectible for the 70th anniversary of the London Tattoo Society.

And there's some cool tattoos in there as well and some history.

So check it out.

Yeah, everybody.

Thank you so much for listening.

Thank you for supporting the show.

Consider doing that if you don't.

Leave us a review on wherever it is you listen to podcasts.

And we'll see you next time.

I can't say for certain if this voice has been retired, but I really need a break.

I'm going to take a long nap inside my shoe.