Episode 701: Spooky Games That Will Ruin Your Actual Life Vol. 4

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Hey, weirdos, I'm Ash, and I'm Elena, and this is Morbid.

Guys, it's Friday, August 8th when we record this.

Mortal Energy.

I have had the best fucking week this week.

No same.

It's been an iconic week.

I missed you.

I missed it.

We were away from each other.

You guys as well.

And we missed them.

Yeah, and I was including Mikey as well.

Yeah, you missed all of us.

I was like we haven't really been away from the listener no i missed both of you yeah i missed both of you too it was horrible

mikey's giving the taylor swift heart he said here you go but it wasn't horrible it was horrible to be away from my my friends and family yeah it was so nice yeah it was a night a very nice week i mean like

right monday it was like boom yeah great

woke up to like the most beautiful day yeah it really it was a great day it was and i got to hang out with my family all week and it was just lovely it was great Yeah.

It was like a very refreshing week.

It really was.

I did cry because I love my dog so much this week because we were off this past week.

Yeah.

And I was just looking down at her and I, I was like, does she understand that I have to go back to work?

And I just, I really started like asked Drew, I started like cry crying.

That's wild.

I think I'm PMSing, but

But she's so beautiful.

And I just want her to know that even though I have to work, I love her.

Yeah.

You know, so she will that's drew said that yeah he said she knows yeah as long as you're kind to them they get it i'm so kind yeah exactly i'm like i'm like wicked kind to her yeah

but yeah i think it's been a good week we got a lot of cool oh you guys sold out the motherfucking wilbur insane show in a matter of minutes we got that news today in my head

sporadically combusted yeah i lost my mind truly and you know we're looking into ways that we can, the people who didn't get tickets, because a lot of you have been messaging us or, you know, commenting or anything.

And even people we knew, we know in like life are like, hey, we couldn't get tickets.

And so like, you guys are rat as fuck for doing that.

But we're looking into ways to make it so that you can all hopefully make it to a show.

You know?

Like, we'll see, we'll see.

We'll let you know as soon as we know.

Not a tour.

Yeah, we're doing a tour.

Yeah, it's going to be fun.

I'm excited.

We have a lot of good ideas up our sleeves.

We do.

This is gonna be

fun.

And maybe another show in the future.

Maybe.

I don't know.

Who knows?

I don't know.

Who can be sure?

Not me, you know.

Who can be sure?

Not I.

It's gonna be fun.

And yeah.

I was gonna say, I was gonna say, I have the unlikely storybook event coming up, but like by the time this comes out, it's already far past happening.

It was great.

I bet you had fun.

I bet I had so much fun.

I bet I had fun.

You know what?

I think this is the last few episodes that we will be doing that.

So there's that.

we won't be far into the past anymore yay it's all gonna be great you guys we're fucking excited and thank you for being excited for us yeah you guys have that when we announced that we you know found a home at sirius you guys

were

unbelievably incredible yeah like the the response was

wild.

It was like beyond my expectations.

Thanks for being so like with us.

Yeah, we love you.

Thank you.

And everybody was saying like we were deserving and like

I saw so many people being like, I've been here for like the full eight years, which is, this is my longest career.

Yeah.

That's crazy.

Eight years.

Eight years.

I can't believe I don't think we're at eight right now, but we're going into the, we're in the eighth year.

Exactly.

Yeah.

Which is just crazy.

But I've seen, I've saw, hello.

I've seen so many.

I've seen, I saw, I see, I saw, I see, I saw the people.

I've seen so many people say that they've been here since the beginning and like they just love watching us succeed, which I was like, that's really nice.

We're very excited for the future.

And interesting enough, our last episode was Big 700.

That's crazy.

And we weren't super in the mood to celebrate it at that point, but 701, we're ready.

Here we go.

701.

Yeah, yeah.

So that's crazy.

That's a lot of episodes.

Yeah, it's insane.

It's a lot of fucking episodes.

Insane Madison.

Insane madison.

Um, I've been re-watching all those things, like Southern Charm and all that shit, and it is a trip, yeah, it really is.

It's a trip.

Oh, also, what?

Uh, we'll get into it, don't worry.

This is a spooky episode.

We're gonna be talking about dangerous, spooky games.

We're also like in a celebratory mood, so it's super loosey-goosey.

We're coming off a week off, so we're like silly when we're coming off of that a scorecard killer, yeah.

Which

holy we need, we need a little loose goose moment, yeah.

I need a little loose goose moment.

Um, and so I this this out of nowhere i heard and this is such a weird way to connect to this as well i heard the girls were watching something okay and it had good vibrations in it from the beach boys yeah banger and for some reason when i heard that i was like why where have i heard that song in like a movie and then i was like oh has it never been kissed the catfish movie It opens up with that like child's chorus singing good vibrations.

One thing about me is I fucking fucking hate the children.

No, but the chorus.

Well, the thing is, I was like, holy shit, I haven't watched the catfish.

You re-watch it.

I re-watched it.

It's scary.

It's just as good as it did the first time.

I re-watched it.

I went through like this period in COVID where I would stay up until like 3 a.m.

Like all the time and just like sleep all day.

I re-watched it during COVID at like 3 a.m.

That shit was genuinely scary.

Yeah, it's it's very uh it's fucked up.

It is and when you re-watch it, you're just like, whoa, yeah,

I gotta re-watch it.

That's like soon.

15 profiles she was using or something.

I think they were all like family.

Yeah, they were all interacting with each other.

Like, and then I'm sorry.

This, this movie is just, if you haven't watched the original catfish movie from like 2008, you gotta.

I'm telling you.

And I remember when we used to live with like all of our friends in that apartment near Boston, we

rented this movie when it came out.

and we were yeah, we we got it to watch, but we we had no idea what it was about because at that point catfishing was not a thing.

No, the movie made it a thing.

Like that made it a thing.

And so like we didn't know what it was about.

And it was kind of almost billed to us as like a horror movie.

It is like a sound footage horror movie.

So while we're watching this, I think he's going to die.

No, we literally, when he shows up at the farm, like when all three of them show up at the farm in the middle of the night, I remember John being like, oh, it's about to pop off yeah like he was like this guy's gonna die and then it was like it does pop off but in a way different not in the way you expect you know what too it's also a very sad movie oh it's so it's really sad yeah it is it's it's got everything if you haven't watched it it's an incredible watch yeah

I like I I know nothing after that.

I just remember that movie really having a certain vibe.

Yeah.

And it was really interesting to rewatch.

So that's just where I'm at right now.

Do you know what I watched the other day?

You've probably never seen it.

What?

You know how we were talking about rom-coms the other day?

Yeah.

I said to Drew, I go, I really want to watch a rom-com.

And I love everything iconic with Danny Pellegrino and his favorite movie is You've Got Male.

Have you ever seen that movie?

No, I've never watched that movie.

You shouldn't.

I know that movie.

You shouldn't.

Have you seen it, Meg Moon?

No.

Is it Tom Hanks and

Meg Ryan?

Meg Ryan.

It's fucking awful.

Yeah, I'm sure it is.

It's like infidelity from the start, which I was like immediately pissed off.

A lot of rom-coms are kind of based on infidelity or the idea of infidelity.

Yeah, when you really think about it, they actually are.

That's why I'm not a tease Neo.

Yeah.

And then the end is kind of stupid, in my opinion.

Damn.

So if you've ever seen You've Got Mail, I need to know if you agree with me.

And if you haven't seen it, well, just agree with me.

If you don't agree with me, don't tell me.

Only agree with me.

I'm in a happy place, okay?

Just agree with me.

But if you haven't seen it, don't.

Don't watch watch it.

No, I'm here to kill their careers right now.

Not your final

1994.

Here's the thing: parts of it are really cute.

And I was at first, I was like, oh, okay, like,

and then it just progressively fell off.

Yeah, I feel like infidelity is kind of just like, everyone's like, isn't it so cute?

Yeah.

No, it's not.

It's not.

It's not.

But yeah, those are our movie recommendations.

And non-recommendations.

The The fucking catfish movie.

It's my

good feeling wash.

I'm like, go watch that.

It's such a comforting movie.

I don't know what to tell you to watch.

It's definitely.

Oh, wait.

I wish you had seen any bit of it.

Has anybody watched Haunting Wives?

No.

Anybody watch?

I need you to watch Elena like a couple of TikToks.

I'm probably not.

No, no, no, not the TV show.

I need you to do this.

At least watch a couple of TikTok clips.

It's insane.

I can do that.

It's insanity.

And I think I need to finish it because I need to know who murdered who and whatnot.

Whoa.

But like, no, that's a thing.

There's like a murder as part of it.

Not even a spoiler.

Don't worry.

But I mean, I'm not worried.

Don't worry.

But it's in, no, it's just insane.

So if you're watching it, let me know.

Holy shit.

And that's recommendations with Ash and Elena.

It is.

All I offered was the catfish movie from 2008.

I'm sure you've got more.

I do.

I'll give some more.

But yeah.

So there's that.

And now we're going to talk about dangerous games that you should never play.

Yeah.

Spooky ass games.

And I feel like always, I got these from like a few different places, mine.

Yeah.

But there's this one website that I highly encourage you to go to and buy the book.

Is it Ghost in My Machine?

Ghost in My Machine.

They get their information from a variety of sources.

The book is amazing.

It's a book on dangerous games.

You can get it through that website or like on it, you know, you can get it at any bookstore, but highly recommend it yeah we'll link

we'll link it all again just so you guys can make sure to go to that website because they have hundreds yeah and hundreds of entries all kinds of cool like legends and stuff it's just a really interesting read so i just wanted to start out by like sending you there no it's fun she'll tell you like the history of things and where they came from and like what the objective is she goes really far into it

is it lucia I think yeah yeah it is Lucia yeah and she's just like really good I got some of my information from there too

So solid shot.

Another recommendation.

See?

Alina, is there more aligned with the show?

Mine are all over the place.

But that's akin to that makes sense.

Yeah.

Do you want to go first?

I'll go first.

Do you want to go like back and forth?

Yeah.

Okay.

Let's do that.

So the first one that I saw that was very interesting was called, Is Anyone There?

Hello?

Hello?

God, are you there?

It's me, Margaret.

That's what it's called.

I think the most dangerous game to play.

Dangerous game.

Margaret are you there?

It's me, Mark.

Honestly, valid.

Yeah, it is.

So this one, have you ever just been like sitting around and you've been like,

I would love to meet a ghost?

Kind of, yeah.

Not to see a ghost.

I want to meet one.

Yeah.

Say hello.

Talk about our lives.

I kind of, I kind of have that.

So like, I feel like most people have that.

Listen, if you're ever sitting there thinking about it, you want to, you know, you want to meet a ghost or some other supernatural baddie.

That's the thing.

Like,

it's probably, it's supposed to be a ghost, but like.

It could be a demon.

Could something else creep in there?

Could be a vamp.

You know, you open a door for somebody, and like, three other people walk through, and you're like, I wasn't opening the door for you.

Oh, that's kind of how this is.

It's like, maybe you open the door and a ghost comes in.

Maybe you open a door and a demon from the netherworld comes in.

That's rough, you know.

And that's you need to know that going in.

That's the risk you take when you play these games, to be quite honest.

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So here's what you're going to need for this because you want to meet the ghost, you want to say hello, you want to have a conversation and you're not fucking worried about who else is coming in.

Okay.

That's where you are.

You signed up.

So

you need salt.

You need a knife or something sharp.

Could be like a letter opener, anything like that.

Black cloth that you can use as a blindfold.

You gotta be blindfolded.

You gotta be blindfolded.

That's fucked up.

Which I'm immediately out of.

How are you gonna meet somebody blindfolded?

Well, you're just gonna have a conversation, you know.

The truth is in the eyes.

Don't worry.

The blindfold will come off eventually.

They're shy, you know?

She did like a little, you did like the like, what's her name from Superstar?

Mary Catherine Gallagher.

Shy.

She's shy.

Yeah, the superstar.

But yeah, maybe they're just shy.

I don't know.

But you need a watch or some other, you know, probably now a phone that keeps time.

An empty room with a door in it, and that door has to close completely.

It would also be like pretty sick if it locks from the outside.

A second room you need to be able to like sit or stand and wait in.

So you need two rooms.

So it has to be at 2 a.m.

I was going to say it's so far past my bedtime.

You might be up with kids.

I might.

That's true.

Hopefully not.

But turn off the lights where you are.

You have to turn off all the lights.

Oh, like dark.

Make sure you're in front of the doorway that leads to the empty room.

You're going to close that door.

And then you're going to blindfold yourself and make sure you can't see a thing.

It's already dark.

Why you got to do that shit?

That's why I'm out.

I can't do that.

That's double dark.

Yeah, that's double dark.

That's what we call double dark.

Double dark is for real business.

That's a lot.

So this, the first part of it is called the invitation.

Ooh, that's ominous.

So again, you're blindfolded, can't see a goddamn thing.

You're going to pick up the salt.

You're going to pour some of that salt into your left hand.

You can close your hand to hold the salt in there.

Okay.

Then you're going to pick up the knife and keep that in your right hand.

You're putting

it in the way.

Yeah.

Holding salt in the left hand, knife, sharp object.

You're like pouring things, picking up things, and you're blindfolded.

This is a lot of responsibility.

And if you can't hack it, don't do it.

All right.

Okay, because this is serious.

Now you're going to knock on the closed door three times.

With your salt hand.

With your salt hand.

So boom, boom, boom.

And then you're going to say out loud, is anyone there?

Reach out again, knock with your left hand three more times and say, is anyone there?

Do it one more time, left hand, knock three times, say, is anyone there?

This is a ritual.

And then you wait.

And you just wait.

You may not hear anything.

And if you don't, if you're not hearing anything and you're not sensing anything around, you say,

I think this is really polite, to be honest.

And I think it's nice.

If now is not a good time, I will wait until you're ready.

You know what?

That's which is pretty like that's a therapized adult.

That is.

That's the retroponized way to go about things.

If you're not, if, if now's not a good time, I'll wait until you're ready.

That's, I like that.

That's nice.

And then you go into that second room that you have and you wait.

And you sit, you sit cross-legged, you do whatever you're comfortable doing.

Sure.

And you wait.

You keep that left hand closed.

You do not open your right hand.

Hold that sharp thing and you stay blindfolded.

And here's the thing.

They might need a minute because you are holding a knife.

Exactly.

And you did summon them.

So it's like, I feel like if you're just like, like out of nowhere and you're just like, whoa, then someone's like, high, holding salt in one hand and a knife and blindfolded.

Yeah.

You may need a second to be like, let me just gather myself

first.

So, you know, you're doing that.

If you keep, and again, that's this is if you didn't hear anything.

Okay.

You don't sense a present, you don't hear anything.

You don't, nothing.

You just go wait.

So you're waiting there.

If you keep hearing nothing at all for a while, the ritual failed.

Failure.

You put the knife down, you take off the blindfold, you get rid of the salt,

you turn on the lights, and you keep the door to that empty room closed.

Forever.

If you can lock it, that would be great.

Don't open that door until the sun rises.

Okay.

All right.

So lock it.

Let it stew.

Okay.

Don't open till the sun rises.

Here's the thing though, if that's a ghost, they're not corporeal.

It's true.

As you learn from Buffy, so they may be

to look right there.

Well, again, that's if you hear nothing and it failed.

All right.

So what happens if you hear something?

If you hear something,

you should, you know, say hello.

You got a greet.

You invited them.

You're the one summoning here.

Yeah, you invited them here.

Yeah, it's like having a dinner party with no dinner if you don't say anything.

You open the door door and you take off the blindfold

and you may see something

or you may see nothing.

But no matter what, you say, hello.

Yeah.

You have your manners.

Yeah, you absolutely do.

And here is where you can ask questions.

You can talk to them.

They have agreed, according to this ritual, to chit-chat with you.

Yeah.

So apparently, now this all sounds great, you know, except like there's no way to close this ritual out.

That sounds awful.

So,

you like, there's no formal way to be like, This is over now.

You should go back to wherever you were coming from.

So, they may just stay.

Oh, no, I don't like an extended visit.

You can give it a try and be like, Okay, bye now.

This was fun.

No, but if they're like, go fuck yourself, they might stick around.

I don't like an extended visit.

Yeah, and to me, that doesn't feel worth it.

I love a heart out, I love a heart out.

Yeah, I search my whole life in social situations

for a hard out i'll make up a hard out if i don't have a heart here's the thing i always have i was just gonna say thing about me i always have

whether i do or don't yeah i do i do i don't have to worry about that here no no heart out it's pretty soft i'm not gonna do this yeah i won't be doing this but the blindfold was my immediate Like, it's a no-go for me.

I need to be able to see.

Yeah, the multitasking also really.

Sensory deprivation is not

not my bag can't do it so i was out immediately when the blindfold came into the situation but i mean i don't rec and again we don't recommend you do any of these games no um do it at your own way but you're a you're a fucking whole ass adult i assume if you're listening to this so like you choose your own way yeah go your own way as fleet madam fleetwood max

it's your prerogative like bobby

okay we're in different you know what though bobby brown said it first Fair enough.

I said, oops.

Fair enough.

Yeah, Bobby Brown.

And then Britney Spears repeated it.

And it bears repeating again.

Oh, Bert.

It's your prerogative.

So, yeah.

So that's the

Is Anyone There game.

All right.

Well, I see that.

And I raise you the white kimono game.

Ooh.

Let's go, girls.

So this one, you have to be really brave to play because it's a one-player game, which yours also sounded a

sort of one-player, but then there could be more because you're inviting people people over exactly but this also kind of goes that way too So you also need a dark room for this game with four distinct corners You need a light with a switch that's easily accessible, so like a lamp.

Okay.

You might want a compass, but it's not totally necessary.

You just need to know which direction each of the corners of your room are in.

For help, sun rises in the east, sets in the west.

Oh, there you go.

Unless you're in the north or south pole, then I don't know what you do.

Get a compass.

Get a compass.

Yeah.

You have to start after midnight.

And apparently between 2 a.m.

and 3 a.m.

is the best time to play the waikomono game.

That makes sense.

So what you're going to do is you're going to go into your room with your four distinct corners.

You only want four.

And lucky for you, at this point in time, your light is still on,

but you need to make sure that you can turn them off while you're lying on your back in the middle of the room.

So think about that.

Yeah.

Okay.

So now you're lying on the floor in the middle of the room.

So you focus on the ceiling.

Focus on it.

Look at it.

Look at it, look at it, look at it, and you get ready to play.

When you're ready, you turn and look at the north corner, then the west, and then the south, and then the east in that order, always looking around to the corners.

Do this two more times, working counterclockwise, so that once you're finished, you've done each corner three times.

Okay, now once you're done looking around the room, cross your arms and repeat this chant three times.

Um, this is Japanese, so I'm gonna do my best.

Onbi iroki, yama, shironi, sawaka.

Okay.

You have to say that three times.

Here's the thing.

Nobody really knows what that translates to.

I was just about to ask that.

Yeah, nobody really knows.

So you should probably think about that before you chant it at your ceiling.

Yeah, I would absolutely think that one through.

Yeah.

I did put it into

Google Translate and all I got was colorful machine.

Okay.

So that could be part of it.

That might be, that's nice.

And it is the white kimono game.

Yeah, so there you go.

You know, okay.

So if you've decided to go through with the chant, now you're going to picture a woman with long black hair dressed in a white kimono, covered in blood, walking toward you.

Oh,

in the beginning, I said, wow, what a beautiful picture.

Covered in blood.

Covered in blood.

Yeah, me personally, I don't know why you would choose this.

Yeah.

But that's on you.

You make your own decisions.

You're an hero.

Hopefully.

Yes.

Bobby Brown, Brittany Smith.

Do what you want to do.

Exactly.

So as soon as she gets in front of you, you have to uncross your arms, turn off the lights, and go to sleep.

You cuckoo nut man.

You have to go to sleep.

You have to go right to sleep.

Straight to bed.

What?

Yeah.

As soon as she gets right in front of you, uncross your arms and go to sleep.

Just go to sleep.

Turn off.

And he's going to sleep.

Turn off the light when she gets like right near you, right over you.

No.

You have to.

No.

You got to.

You chose this.

You chose this.

You chose this, not me.

So here's the deal.

If you see this woman in your dreams, you did everything right.

Oh.

But don't get too excited because you're not done yet.

I haven't been excited this whole time.

She is going to try to talk to you in your dreams.

I hate small talk so I know.

Yeah, you'll be fine.

Yeah, you can't talk to her.

Don't worry.

You can't say shit.

And this is big.

Do not tell her your name.

Oh, no.

Never, don't tell her name.

Do you know why?

No.

Oh, okay.

I don't know.

It's just an ominous or it's just ominous.

It's even better that way.

Like, we don't need to know why.

No, I don't ask questions.

I just do what I'm told.

Yeah.

And also, don't let her get anywhere near your ears because if she whispers into that ear of yours or both of them, maybe even, you're done for.

You're done for.

You're fucking done for?

Yeah.

If you didn't heed my warning and she does whisper into your ear or both of them ears, you better wake your ass up right away and check the corners of your room.

And if by the grace of the sweet, sweet universe, you don't see her and you don't see anything, you're safe, but you can never do this again.

I mean, who among us?

If you wake up and you do see a shadow in the corner of your room, you have to turn the lights on immediately and you can never be in the dark again.

And if you can't wake up, you died.

Oh my God.

R.I.P., brother.

Mine's like, I don't know, you you might talk to a ghost.

Maybe they'll hang around.

You're like, you, and you died.

And you died.

I told you, I see you're in the dark.

You represent you in their game.

And I raise you the white commodion.

Yeah.

And you can never be in the dark again.

So you just have to remain in the light forever.

Yeah, if you wake up and you see a shadow in your room.

That's awful.

Turn those lights on and never, ever be in the dark again.

Which will really complicate your life.

Yeah, I don't, I'm not going to do this.

Because also, everybody has kind of a broad definition of what the dark is.

Of what dark is.

I would assume like you can't be in any kind of darkness, anybody's definition of darkness, physical darkness.

Yeah.

Not the diarknya.

You'll probably be in the diarknyas in your head because you'll be like really freaking out.

You'll be living in the diarknyas.

I mean, realistically, can you close your eyes?

That's the dark.

Yeah.

You're fucked.

Oh, I hate that.

Yeah, it's scary.

I really don't like that at all.

Like we said, spooky ass games that will ruin your actual life.

Yeah, and might actually kill you.

RIP, like I said.

Like, do you guys remember that Three Kings game?

I'll never forget that game as long as I live.

Me neither.

Every time I live.

Every time I come across anything about it, I'm like, that scared me to my core.

There are so many like little blogs about that.

Yeah.

That just go on and on and on.

And I'm like, why are people still playing this?

It fucks me up.

It's scary.

The idea of that.

There's so many that we've covered that I'm like,

what?

Like, didn't you, did you cover Dry Bones?

Did I?

Maybe we didn't cover it.

I saw, I actually ran across dry bones when I was researching.

Like, you have to like hide from him.

I think I covered like a very

version of it because I remember I was reading it and I was like, fuck that.

I think mine was the Shadow Man.

Yeah, I think it's similar to that.

It's like a variation, but like.

Or no, no, no, no.

Mine was Midnight Man.

Midnight Man.

That's what it was.

That's what it was.

Which is, it was very similar to Dry Bones.

That's, I hate it.

Yeah, me too.

I hate it a lot.

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all right well what you got all right i mean mine's not it not

mine's not that bad okay you know uh so mine's called charlotte's web i saw this one it's pretty bad i mean it's it could be or could be

okay i suppose i me i'm not trying to do this but um so what we're trying to do here not me but maybe you, are trying to get the spirit of Charlotte Webster to appear.

Yeah.

Who Charlotte Webster was, was a seven-year-old little girl.

And she lived in the 15th century, and her mother was accused of witchcraft and burned at the stake.

Yeah.

Charlotte watched the whole thing and then ran away into the woods and ended up dying in there.

Horrible.

Pretty horrific.

So, of course, why wouldn't we want to, you know, bring her back?

yeah you know let's

ask some questions life didn't mess with charlotte enough let's bring her back let's bring her back why let her rest you know yeah like she in peace she earned it um so we what we need for this is you need a room with a pretty um large mirror

you need a flashlight i got those things you need two chairs i got those a table i have tables and a child's toy I actually don't think I have a child's toy.

I have plenty of those.

Can I use a cat toy?

Yeah, we can work together for this.

I don't think that'll work.

Okay.

So you have to play with one other person.

Oh, okay.

I like a group game.

Yeah, I like it when there's another person.

Or like a partner.

You go to a room, the room with the big mirror.

You bring the flashlight.

You bring the toy with you.

And it should be a toy that a little girl would find appealing.

Hell yeah.

You sit in the two chairs in front of the mirror, facing the mirror.

Spooky.

And you put the table behind you.

And you put the toy on the table.

Okay.

You should be able to see the toy in the mirror.

So you look in the mirror, and this is very important because you only have one chance to say this and you have to say it at exactly the same time.

That's a lot of pressure.

Yeah, if you fuck it up, you don't get to do it again.

You know what, though?

We would probably be good at this because we say things in unison

even when we don't mean to.

Yes, we would kill it.

We really would.

So you have to say at the same time, we want to play Charlotte's web.

Okay.

Charlotte is supposed to appear behind you.

Which I hated about it.

I don't like it.

And she's going to start playing with the toy if she likes it.

Okay.

If she doesn't like it.

I was going to say, what if she doesn't?

Yeah, if she doesn't like it,

she'll throw a, she'll go fucking, she'll do what a seven-year-old does and she'll throw a tantrum.

Well, and also she had a hard life.

She doesn't know about emotional regulation.

And also, exactly.

And don't give me a fucking, don't summon me back just to give me a shit toy that I don't want to play with.

You better get her a Barbie Dream house or something.

You better show up with some K-pop demon hunter realness.

Her kids are really into this right now.

They are.

That's a banger of a soundtrack.

Okay.

Guys, if you, if you, I told you, if your children have not gotten into it, trust me, it sounds kooky.

Because when I heard it, I was like, K-pop demon hunter?

Like, what is that?

I thought that was like some crazy YouTube thing or something.

And I was like, you're not allowed on YouTube.

What are you doing?

No, it's on Netflix.

It's awesome.

Banger of a soundtrack.

I'll probably watch it tonight.

I'm watching them.

It's pretty great.

One of my kids is going to be roomy for Halloween.

So

let's fucking go.

We got to order hair and everything.

So, yeah.

So give Charlotte some K-pop demon hunter shit.

Like, really come to the fucking game prepared.

Get one of those, like, Wonder Balls, the, like, mini, and you, like, open it, and there's all these like mini surprise mini things.

Yeah, like, lol dolls.

I just got a lol doll.

A doll doll.

I think it's a lol doll.

But I lol.

It should be lol doll.

It should be a lol doll.

You're right.

Where was the marketing person on that?

You're right.

So, well, I just got the girls little

wonder ball things that are little books.

Shitty versions of real books.

That's so cute.

They're really cool and they love them so far.

I love them.

But yeah, get them one of those.

Yeah.

I'm yelling at you guys like you are coming to the table with some bullshit, but like I'm just trying to warn you, really bring some stuff to the table.

We're just giving you ideas.

Yeah, I don't want her throwing a temper tantrum in your house.

She's not a tantrum.

She could destroy your house and she can destroy you.

So we're just going to prepare for you.

And one of the main things is she's, so she shows up.

If she starts freaking out, you just got to sit there.

Don't turn around.

don't look at her don't say a goddamn word to her so you're doing like the opposite you just have to sit there yeah you're doing the whole like i'm not acknowledging this tantrum oh wow and you can't look at her don't look at her in the mirror don't look at her in real life don't look at her don't look at her don't look at her

that's what she says when she shows up she says don't look at me and then she starts freaking out but If she likes that new K-pop demon hunter thing you bought her or Wonderball or Wonderball or Roberts,

then she'll she'll start playing with it and that's great again do not turn around and look at her oh so even if she's happy don't perceive her no do not perceive her okay don't do it at all she does not want that i don't blame her she's been perceived too much in life yeah um so you can just let her do her thing and then you can start talking to her and you can start asking her things but again do not turn around you can ask her questions and she'll answer them to the best of her ability so you're just like looking at yourself in the mirror?

Yeah, you're just looking at yourself in the mirror and you're just asking her questions.

That'll fuck you up.

You're letting her play.

And the main thing is you have to be nice.

Yeah, nice.

You just polite.

Be gentle, be kind.

If you have any kind of fucking attitude, she's going to be like my youngest and she's going to call your ass out for it.

Yeah, she will.

She will call you out.

She'll make you think about all your life choices.

She's like, she's like a COVID baby.

Like they are built different.

Charlotte is built different.

Yeah, she's not going to put up with that.

She's like a Spanish influenza baby.

Yeah, she's definitely not putting into that.

She's

before that.

Way before that.

Yeah.

I should have been there.

She was a black plague.

I was going to say, there was a pandemic during her life.

She's way back there.

But so you can ask her the questions, talk to her, have a conversation, you know, like, but again, be chill.

And you should really, like, you shouldn't ask her things that like require her to be like all-knowing.

You know, yeah, she's a 27-year-old from the 15th century.

And she's busy.

Yeah.

Just putting together her miniature.

So, you know, you got, you got your, your answers.

Okay.

You got your little thing.

That's fine.

That's when you say goodbye, Charlotte.

Oh, that's a little bit rude and sudden.

And she might be like, go fuck yourself.

I mean, she might keep playing.

If she does keep playing, you got to just sit there and wait for her to be done.

So you sort of just adopt a child.

You're just babysitting a child.

A traumatized child at that.

Yeah.

Who has no emotional regulation.

So if she doesn't want to leave yet, you just got to sit there and let her do her thing.

And when she does leave, she will just kind of fade back into the darkness.

That's pretty dark.

That's fucking metal of her.

Yeah.

She doesn't like, you know, she doesn't do like a spin kick and then like joke it all and then just be like, Charlotte, out.

She just fades.

That's a bummer.

She should work on it.

And the thing is, you can't turn around until she is completely out of view.

So if you turn around too quick, shit's going to go down.

Yeah.

Yeah, so what happens if you do turn around?

That's the thing.

Nobody's it's like scream when there's no motive.

It's scarier though.

And if we haven't heard what happens, then we can assume that nobody has is around to tell us what happens.

So that's again, if you piss her off, she'll throw a tantrum, she'll hurt you.

So don't do it.

I don't like it.

But that is the Charlotte's web game.

All right.

That you might die from.

That you might die from.

Maybe.

It's dangerous.

You could.

We don't know.

Yeah.

That's the scariest thing we don't know terrifying all right well my next one is not as dire okay it could it could be it's the picture game

i think i've heard of this one it's i kind of want to play this one i'm not gonna lie oh damn this is one that i might want to play this ash you won't be in the same room as a ouija board no it's different we had a full discussion about this i know and i'm i'm sick of you people testing me it makes zero sense it makes sense it's a gut feeling and you listen to your gut yeah and ouija boards are so much more complicated to close out you don't know what you're fucking with no yeah you don't know what you're fucking with here either, but there's not a lot of steps to close it out.

So just listen to me, okay?

For this game, you have to start right at midnight.

And I like that.

I like promptness.

Yeah, I love that.

I'm not good at it, but I like that.

No, I like when I am.

I like

to you.

I like when I am prompt.

It just doesn't happen a lot.

Listen, stop coming for my throat or I'm not going to tell you about this game, you two.

I just love to meet Ball.

Shut up.

Get out of here.

We both went.

I like when I'm on time because it doesn't happen often.

It's true.

But you have to be on time for this game.

Okay, I'm on time.

You have to start right at midnight.

You're not always on time.

Midnight, I can be on time.

Okay.

I'll definitely get there.

So here's what you're going to bring: you have to bring and prepare a string or a rope long enough to make a big circle by like tying the ends together.

Okay.

Once you tied the ends together and you have your circle of rope, you're going to set it up in the middle of the room and you're going to place a glass in the center.

According to writer Chrissy Stockton from Thought Catalog, wine is recommended to fill the glass.

But if you can't do wine, just use your own discretion.

I don't care what you put in there.

Cranberry juice.

There you go.

Shirley Temple.

Frappuccino, if you can ask.

Grab all your players and have everybody sit around the rope outside of it.

Oh, that's big.

Don't sit in it.

Yes.

Make sure you can easily hand somebody the camera that you're going to hand them when it's their turn.

And make sure that that nobody for any motherfucking reason steps inside the circle that you made with the rope.

I don't know what happens if you do.

Again, you go ahead and find out.

You know it's not good.

I don't recommend it.

Now, once each person is sitting, place a small mirror in front of them facing up toward the ceiling.

And then you're going to grab your camera.

And you really need like an actual camera, not your phone.

Oh, okay.

We're going old school.

I was just going to say, we're kicking it old school.

I like it.

Yeah.

Now make sure the flash is turned on.

Turn off all the lights in the room and go sit with the group.

Okay.

Everybody's going to close their eyes now and they're going to take each other's hands.

It's like a little kumbaya moment.

Love that.

But instead of singing kumbaya together, one person says, I trust you.

And then the next person and so on and so forth until everybody in the circle establishes trust.

Cute.

I kind of love it.

It's like team building.

You should do it with your work colleagues.

Do it.

Don't.

I'm not recommending it.

Don't.

So make sure it's stated one at a time, by the way.

Like, I trust you.

And then the next person goes, like, not all in unison.

Okay.

So now, in unison, all together, all together now.

All together now.

Say, the door is open.

Please come in.

And everybody can open their eyes at that point.

Oh, it's a little spooky.

This is very spooky.

I like it.

This is way spookier than Ouija.

It's fun though.

It feels, it is.

Yeah.

It feels more fun and more spooky.

It doesn't feel as dangerous as Ouija.

Ouija just feels so dangerous.

See, this feels more dangerous to me because you're literally saying the door is open.

Come on in.

Yeah, but you close it out.

You kind of have to say that when you do Ouija too, you open the door.

Well,

you can just kind of start.

I don't think you're supposed to do that.

I think you're supposed to actually make it a...

That's see, that's it.

Well, you can close it out, but.

How do you close it out?

Opening it with such vigor feels scary.

I don't know.

I think you're stating your intentions.

But anyway,

now somebody takes the camera and says, I caught you

and takes a picture with the camera facing directly in front of them.

I caught you.

Yeah, you could say it however you want.

You could say, I caught you.

Oh, damn, no.

You could sing them off.

Or you could say, I caught you.

You say how you say it.

How are you going to say it?

I caught you.

I didn't expect that.

Wow.

That was so weird.

Melissa, the rewatcher?

It just came out.

You sound like Molly from the Rewatcher.

That's who I channeled.

I think I would say, gotcha.

Funny you can't say I caught you.

I'd be quicker than that.

I caught you.

How would you say it, Mikey?

I would say, gotcha, gotcha.

Gotcha, gotcha.

All right.

So that's how we're all saying it.

And then

you pass the camera to the next player and everybody does the same, but don't look at any of the pictures until the game is finished.

I won't.

So you have to go around enough times for each person to take three pictures.

Damn.

If during that timeframe, somebody starts to feel nauseous or starts crying, you skip them.

Skip the stupid baby who's crying.

No, I'm just kidding.

So many people are like, oh, I'm out.

It's like,

nauseous girly.

If my dog comes, I just start crying.

I'm like, oh my God.

I hope she knows I love her.

They're like, get out.

So

the poor person that's like, I don't feel good.

And you're like, go fuck yourself.

You can't take a picture.

They have to stay there, but

they have to just not take a picture just have to shut up they sit there but out they sit there and nauseate

exactly

the town of agda in france is famous for sun sand sea and sex but lately life on the coast has taken a strange turn the town's mayor a respected respected pillar of the community, has been arrested for corruption.

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Then there's the mysterious phone calls that local people have been getting.

I am the Archangel Michael.

The whole town has been thrown into chaos.

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So

once you've done that and you've skipped the nauseous cry babies, put the camera down and make sure everybody's eyes are closed again.

This time, everybody says the farewell together three times.

You say, it's time to go home.

It's time to go home.

It's time to go home.

I like it.

There's a beginning and an end.

That also feels very like

time to make the donuts.

Time to go home.

Yeah.

It's a little stepford YV.

I like it.

But then everybody turns their mirrors upside down at that.

at that point with the reflective part like facing down.

You're going to go turn on the lights and grab a knife or some scissors just to cut through the rope.

Just grab a knife.

Yeah, don't stab anyone.

Yeah.

And then pour the contents of the glass outside.

Apparently, you're supposed to do this on like some dirt.

Okay.

Now, look at you being a brave bitch who just went outside after all that.

Look at you.

Look at that.

Then go into the safety question mark.

The safety.

Like the safety, like of your own home.

Oh, but I don't know if it's safe anymore.

Here's the thing.

I know it's not.

I can tell you right now.

The safety of your own.

It's like sexy from Ron's Sexy.

And we'll explain later.

And look at your pictures.

A lot of people see really freaky shit, but it's important to note, and this is from The Ghost of My Machine, which we were talking about at the top of the show.

If anyone playing the game starts to feel sick or they start acting weird and they do take a picture, do not look at that specific picture that they took.

I'm going to look at that picture.

Well, you can't.

There's no way you're going to tell me don't look at this picture.

You can't look at that picture.

Look at it.

And you also also have to destroy the camera if somebody takes a picture when they're in.

You're not using my camera.

Well, that's what I said.

I said, I wrote this down.

I said, definitely think about that going into it because if you break your mom's camera, I don't want her calling us.

Yeah, I don't want that shit.

I don't want to hear it.

No.

Also, if anybody says out loud that they're scared or freaked out.

Shut up, chicken.

Oh, no.

No, just kidding.

You really should end the game right there or else that person becomes a target.

Oh, no.

So don't really state out loud that you're scared.

You know what?

Here,

we're here to tell you to repress your feelings.

Don't speak them out loud.

For the sake of this game.

Nobody wants to hear them.

We don't.

Emotions, gross.

Not here.

Don't want to hear it.

Not until it's time to go home.

It's time to go home.

It's time to go home.

And just for the couple of people that will take what I just said very seriously.

Shut up.

I am kidding.

I'm not telling you to repress your emotions.

Get out of here.

You can say, I'm just not during this fucking game.

Oh!

And I mean that.

All right.

What you got, Red.

I like that one.

It's fun.

Don't you play?

I want to play it.

I kind of want to, but I also feel like I, someone will not feel well.

I feel.

It will probably be me.

It will probably be me.

And then I'll be pissed that I, and then, like, if you took a picture, I'd be like, oh, I just want to see that picture.

And then you'd have to destroy your camera.

It's like curiosity.

I just, I'm too curious.

There's the thing, though, nobody knows what happens if you look.

So it could be fine.

So maybe it'll be fine.

Or it could be really detrimental.

Maybe there would be a picture of Rod Stewart and everything would be okay.

And and he would say sex is sexy and we would say anything for rod anything for rod i think we discussed rod stewart on on a past episode i think we did yeah we went to the concert anything for rod yeah anything for rod you played if you think i'm sexy if you think we did because we sang it to the

if you think i'm sexy and then i thought the next lyric was come on sugar baby yeah yep but it's not and i did not correct you when you said that no you didn't you never do no i i never will i love your my lyrics are always better they are They're always superior.

So I just want this.

Ah, this queen.

She's so beautiful.

She's so beautiful.

That one might be my favorite one.

I wrote a better song than they did.

Okay.

Like, I'm just going to be honest.

I did.

Humble brag.

All right.

So I have one last one.

Okay, girl.

Here, it's called the answers game.

But this one isn't like super scary.

It's more just like if you want some answers and then like potentially you can invite a, you know, sinister force into your house.

Wow.

But that's, you not guaranteed.

It could happen.

Yours are very answers coded.

They are.

I wanted answers.

You're so curious.

I told you I'm curious.

So for this, you need a small light, any kind, as long as you can bring it with you, like a portable light.

Like a little flashlight.

You need a flashlight candle.

Something like that.

Ooh, bring a flashlight.

Candle is kind of scary.

Yeah, a candle could go out.

So I'll do that.

You need a watch or something, you know, phone, whatever.

You need a large flat surface.

And you need chalk.

Matches are a lighter, something to light, something else, a dish that is fireproof, and lots of paper, and a dark room.

Okay.

So it's done after nightfall.

So as long as it's dark.

No, like real time.

Go into a room that is pitch motherfucking black.

No.

Make it as dark as you can.

Draw shades.

Put stuff over the windows.

You got to be in a place where you can't see your hand in front of you.

You need to walk in that room and say, hello, darkness, my old friend.

And if you, if you don't sing that when you walk in, the ritual fails.

Oh.

Yeah, so that's it.

I knew.

So get on it.

On the large flat surface, you're going to draw two boxes.

And on top of one, you're going to write yes.

And on top of the next one, you're going to write everybody.

No.

No.

Are you asking the state to prom?

Will you go to the bathroom?

Now use the lighter and burn one paper at a time.

And you're going to collect all the ashes onto that dish.

Oh.

Do this until you have a shit ton of ashes.

Me.

Yeah, all the ashes you need.

And you're going to spread those ashes to cover each box.

So you need enough ashes to cover both boxes.

All right.

You're going to light that light that you brought, candle, flashlight, whatever it is, only that light.

Note the time or set a timer for an hour.

No more than an hour.

That's a long time.

Yeah.

That's plenty of time.

It is, but like, it's very important.

You sit in front of the boxes and you say, I invite you to cross the threshold.

Speak to me.

Wait until you feel something.

You have to feel a presence.

You have to like actually feel like there is someone or something in the room with you.

I kind of always feel that way when I'm alone.

I know I feel that way too.

So it could be misleading, but you need that one little light is the only thing on in that room.

Everything around you should be pitch black.

And then you'll start feeling something.

Now, it shouldn't take a ton of time.

And

after like close to an hour, if you're still sitting there and you're not feeling anything, the ritual failed.

You got to clean everything up.

And you just do like whatever kind of cleansing you really want to.

Okay.

To kind of get rid of all the bad yuckies.

If you do feel something in the room with you, then keep going.

Yeah.

Stop now.

Start asking your questions.

You should come in there with questions.

You don't want to start feeling something and then be like, whoa, wait a second.

What do I say?

Because they're going to get pissed and be like, go fuck yourself.

Yeah.

Don't be in there.

So many of these coaches are are like go fuck yourself if you don't do it right

so come in with questions after you ask the question look at the boxes if the answer is yes then the ashes will be moved like disturbed in the yes box no same thing that's cool sometimes they'll be disturbed in both or in none and that could mean that they're either fucking with you or that they don't probably will like a decent answer for you.

So it's like a maybe.

All right.

You have to fix the ashes each time if you want to keep asking questions.

You must end this game in an hour.

Yeah.

You cannot go over an hour.

Why would you?

If you go over an hour, you fucked.

I don't want to do most things for you.

Yeah, don't do that.

And you thank them.

You say, thank you so much.

Be courteous for that.

And then you say, it is time to leave now, though.

But thank you.

Okay.

Really be appreciative.

Yeah.

You cleanse the room and shit.

And that should be good.

Or there is a possibility that you invited something that is not super awesome.

They could lie to you, yeah, they could like fuck you over, yeah, and they could just stay.

Like, there's a potential that when you say bye, it's time to leave, thank you so much that they're like, Oh my god, go yourself.

Your ghosts really love to say that.

That is the complication with any of these games, and that's usually what turns me away because I don't like ambiguity.

I don't want, and I, when I tell you it's time, when I tell you, when I tell you it's time to leave, get out.

I'm done.

When I'm done socializing, get out.

Do you have a broom?

Like, get it.

Yeah.

Do you do the, you got to do the broom trick.

The broom trick?

Yeah.

What is the broom trick?

I need to make sure I have it right.

Let me do a quick Google.

It's either

you flip a broom like upside down to get unwanted house guests out.

Oh, shit.

Or right.

I think it's upside down.

I think like the bristles face the air.

Shit.

How to because you're

cleaning the air of them.

house guests with a broom.

Imagine if it's just like you hit them with the broom.

They will start beating the shit out of them.

Your house guests will leave if you strike them with a broom.

Which is, I mean, that is true.

I'm not telling you that, but I'm just saying it would work.

Stand it up by its bristles near the door.

Oh, there you go.

How fucked up would that be, though?

You just see someone get up and grab a broom and just place it by the door.

I'd be like, I think it's like nothing magical about that i think it's just uncomfortability

but you'd be like i'm gonna go like that would be it whatever it takes because you'd be like whatever's happening here is weird and i need to leave maybe they won't even come back after that that's even better oh my god there you go i love it there you go you lose friends i love it

well you usually like your friends are okay to stay for a bit yeah just a little bit just a little bit a little bit uh but yeah those are my spooky scary dangerous games okay well i have one more you have one more it's a shorty but a goodie i love that it's and i hope I say this right.

This is Spanish.

So it's El Huego del Libro Rojo, which translates into red book game.

Let's go.

So all you need to play this one is a red hardcover book with no pictures inside.

Okay.

And you need one red candle.

So first you got to turn off all the lights, Sethamood.

Hell yeah.

And light your red candle.

Whoever is playing puts the palm of their hand on the book and they ask, red book, can I enter your game?

Then with eyes closed, they go to a random page and they point out a sentence.

And the sentence should answer your question, but it's sort of up to you to use discretion.

I love this one.

No, it's really fun.

I would actually probably do this.

Yeah.

It's sort of up to you to use discretion to figure out the answer.

If you feel like it's a yes, then you can start.

If it seems ambiguous, like I said, I don't like ambiguity, you try again.

But if it says no, then you better not continue playing.

You better be like, okay, cool.

Bye.

Cool.

Sorry I bothered you.

Yep.

Everybody playing can take turns if they get a yes, yes passing the book around, asking one question

once they've been let in.

And you close your eyes, opening to a different page, point at that sentence on the page and seeing if that answers your question.

I like this.

So yeah, it seems pretty fun.

To end the game, you have to ask Red Book, Can I leave your game?

Oh, and this is where it can be.

No, I'm not leaving it up to someone else.

Well, you have to if you play this.

You can't end until everybody has got explicit permission to end the game.

Oh, shit.

And at that point, you can then turn your lights on, blow out your candle, and go about your life.

But if you don't get permission, you just have to keep going.

So this could last you a whole lifetime.

Yeah.

Wow.

You could keep playing this until you perish.

Yeah, you could.

Whoa.

And that would really stink.

Yeah, I won't be doing that.

But there are examples of people who kept playing after the book told them it was time to stop, and shit got really fucking weird for them.

No.

Yeah.

Don't do that.

I read a story about a man who just disappeared.

Oh, no.

Yeah.

Like into thin air.

Gone.

He ran into the woods and they never found him again.

Oh no.

Yeah.

Shit.

It had creepy pasta vibes, but I don't know.

Could be real.

But I like it either way.

I don't like it, but I'm afraid of it.

I'm terrified.

Oh, I didn't witch.

That was my foot.

I saw you.

I did not fart.

It was my foot.

Let me recreate it.

Oh, okay.

See?

Recreate it.

But you know, when you can't recreate it, you're like, I swear, I swear.

I swear to fart.

Well, what a good way to end this episode.

We are so happy.

I'm so happy.

So,

we hope you keep listening and we hope you keep it

weird.

But not so weird that you don't come on over with us to Sirius XM.

Woo!

Seriously!

Seriously.