Share & Tell & Moan, with Elle Duncan and Katie Nolan

Welcome to Pablo Torre Finds Out.

I am Pablo Torre and today we're going to find out what this sound is

right after this ad.

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What are hip dips?

Is that when it goes out and then straight?

Yeah, it's when you come down, you go out, you go back in, you go back out at the thigh.

So I do have a hip dip, which is fine.

Like I've learned to embrace it and love my hip dips, but they're not that cute.

On,

so I do a lot of like, like I'll twist, contort.

So like push your hip up.

Exactly.

You do like a little bit of that.

If you don't have a butt, it also, that also works if you don't have like a good butt that's a good oh is it like you do i got a lot of you do i know i'm saying for the for those of us who are like i don't have to worry about hip dips because it never really goes out again um you can do the little pop i'm just nodding like a scientist who are not watching on youtube where the draft is out

and we all know it you got a booty pablo i don't know his caps he's got lower booty guys this isn't about me i like yours yours is nice thank you katie i like your body

you know what you've got one thing you've got a body you've got a body that

literally

quit.

Just kidding.

I quit all the time.

You've got a body that you can wear literally anything.

I don't know your time.

You do.

No, you do.

Listen, again, I'm 41 years old.

I've learned to embrace my body, but there are some things I have to run from.

There are some silhouettes that it's like, that ain't me.

What are you running from, Elle?

Anything, drop-waist sh ⁇ .

A drop-waist shit is ugly.

Sorry.

I'm so sorry.

Yes, but you could wear that if you would have.

If you wanted to, all the time.

I was apologizing to you.

Anybody who wore a drop, genuinely a drop-waisted wedding dress.

Any woman who wore a drop-waisted wedding dress, I felt immediately like she would go, but that was my favorite dress.

It looks good on some people.

I hate it.

Have you seen the new one that has the waist sickles?

Correct.

What is a drop-waisted anything?

It's a waist that's lower than it should be.

Yeah.

So you know how an empire waist is like a higher waist on the dress?

Obviously, I knew that.

Right.

And then this is your natural waist.

Like A-line.

A drop-waist is like around your hip.

Correct.

And then the skirt happens.

Yeah.

You have to be big.

A longer torso.

You want a longer torso.

Right.

Or you have to be.

Somebody wants to elongate their torso.

I don't know.

So I was historically very large-chested growing up.

I was a triple D by the time I was in the seventh grade.

Damn.

And so

my graduation present to myself was a breast reduction.

And I'll never forget going to Charlotte Roos for the first time after I had my new little B titties

and just being so excited to wear all of those little tiny Charlotte Roos tops without a bra because that's all I wanted.

Like it was beef free is to just be friends.

Meanwhile, the opposite end of the spectrum were like dying to wear a bra.

Like, get up, get favor, boost, come on.

And you're like, I just want to be for real.

I want to be flat-chested and I want to wear these handkerchief shirts.

Oh, yeah, those handkerchief shirts.

You really could not have boobs with those.

No, you had to be flat-chested.

Because it looked wild.

Yeah, you had to be flat-chested.

So we did have perks.

They weren't perky, but we did have perks.

I'm telling you, man, that body, you can wear it all, babe.

And speaking of curvy and wanting to wear like bigger clothes, they do, believe it or not, Abercrombie does like a curvy, baggy jean for like a curvy girl that you should, yeah, yeah, apparently.

They, there's rave reviews, not for me because I wish I was curvy, I would kill to be curvy, but people who are curvy are like that.

These jeans are awesome.

Abercrombie did a full rebrand.

Yeah, these are Abercrombie.

They're super cute.

They're like made out of real jean.

Nothing else is made out of denim anymore.

It's always this like cheap, stretchy jean.

Yeah, super stretchy.

Abercrombie will always be the place that my friend in high school always wanted to go to because she said they were the easiest place to steal from.

True.

That in skin market, but skin market didn't last very long.

What made Abercrombie easy to steal from?

She could get the security tags off the easiest, I think.

And so we would go.

And the dumbest employees because they didn't know they were just there to be hot, gorgeous.

Just a bunch of Gronks patrolling.

Yes, exactly.

And honestly, most of the jeans, at least back when I was in high school, already looked dirty.

So if you could get the security tag off, you could walk out with them and you looked like you were wearing dirty, washed, overworn jeans.

They didn't look new anyway.

So, she would go into the dressing room and, you know, come out.

Everything would be fine.

We'd get to the car and she would just start disrobing and just pulling Abercrombie jeans out of like all her orifices.

I'm like,

yes.

I'm like, when did you do this?

And yeah, it was, it was a hot spot for stealing.

Sick.

Don't steal, kids.

It's bad.

And don't do it.

Unless you have to.

If there's anything that I found out today, it's don't steal from Aberdeen Fitch in 2020.

Oh, oh.

She thought you were asking what year it is.

I was like, Pablo, are you good?

Pablo, it's 2023.

I also

like Gronk today.

99.

You're allowed to do it.

99.

99.

What a year.

I think I was frequenting Delia's in 99.

Delia's.

Sorry, Pablo, did you want to do a podcast?

Should we do that?

I guess.

I've been doing an investigation, guys, that I want to.

Somebody had to.

I got so many tweets about this.

Like, my niche now is: okay,

the Dallas Mavericks win game two of the Western Conference.

I know where you're going.

Semifinals.

They beat the Clippers.

They're now obviously playing in the conference finals against the T-Wolves.

But at the post-game presser, Luka Doncic sits down and he takes questions and this happens.

We are open shot, so I'm just sharing the ball, and our energy was great.

What do you think?

Okay.

Moving on.

So, if you could not discern from the audio, maybe if you're just listening on the podcast, how do you guys describe what happened there?

There was sex noises happening.

Yeah, porn.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Somebody was playing porn or

nearby having pretty mind-blowing sex.

Yeah.

Because if you were doing it in public, that would be, and to make that much noise, it would have to be quite an experience.

I was going to say, like, whatever.

No, no, no, no.

Nobody's ever done that.

and mint it.

I'm sorry.

Nobody ever has sex, even good sex.

And it's like, ah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Like, no.

It's a porn stream.

Not a constant stream of moaning.

Yeah.

Unless you're trying to fill a silence or something.

Right.

Which in that situation you wouldn't.

Yeah, that's definitely it's porn.

It's porn.

It's probably porn.

So the the pornography.

A pornographic film.

The clubhouse leader, of course, was this was a media member.

Of course, like the Zoom air, we've all seen, you know,

what's his face's penis?

Yep, that guy exactly.

That guy's penis.

Jeffrey Tubin.

Tubin.

It's a very funny name.

A very odd-nose.

Yeah.

Like a

tube in your pants.

Character tape for an adult story.

Yes.

So it was a media member, was the reigning theory.

And there are some suspects in that.

I mean, literally, Amin Al Hassan once had porn on his computer when he was being interviewed, I think, by Kevin O'Connor, like at a courtside post-game thing.

And I mean, he had to close his laptop.

In my defense, we were doing research for a movie that involved a certain adult film actress.

And so I was

walking on the computer.

Whoa, what are you doing?

You left your computer earlier.

What are you doing?

I mean,

that, oh my goodness, that was

seven hours ago.

That was seven hours ago.

I swear to God, it was research.

I swear to God.

Zach, you know what was.

KOC, just catch you watching Amime is.

I don't know what you're talking about.

So sorry, Amin, but I can tell you that it was not Amino Hassan.

Okay.

This is where my investigation starts.

Amin, was this you?

He says,

no.

So

I begin to reach out to four different sources.

So I'm trying to get to the, I'm taking this seriously.

Okay.

This is what I do on the show.

I find out in ways that are taking serious things stupidly and stupid things seriously.

Yes.

In this case, it's kind of, kind of felt like both.

A league source told us

that

it was not a media member.

So they know who it is.

Well, what they said in so many words is that the call, the moan, was coming from inside the house.

Meaning?

Meaning this was not a media member, but a Mavericks player,

a teammate of Luka Doncic, trying to mess with him

by playing it off their phone.

And so I guess in Europe, this is a thing, a common prank is like, this is apparently a thing where like you would change someone's ringtone to sex sounds and you call them at press conference and they're like, was this something like that?

And they have passcodes.

Yeah.

It's a very tight locker room, apparently.

Another source indicated this was multiple players, not just one.

I guess which is kind of like in, you know, like a,

I felt like that was them deflecting, like it was all of us, like an I.M.

Spartacus situation.

They're all standing up.

This was me.

Um, and so I look at the Mavericks roster.

I'm like, okay, who on this list of players would be doing this?

And

I personally was rooting for a guy

whose name is Alex Fudge, but no one corroborated that.

That was just the hope I had.

But then talking to sources who know the team based on personality profiles and so forth,

their guess, their educated guess, was that this was either,

and this is where I get a bit irresponsible because now I'm just like putting guys on blast hypothetically.

Right, that we have not really confirmed.

All caveats apply here.

Yeah, nobody's gonna care, they'll clip it without that part.

I am not saying that it's definitely PJ Washington or Derek Jones Jr.,

but uh, they are suspects in this case.

But the big twist, the new theory into this, the reverse cowgirl, if you will,

the twist is that this was not a phone, this was not a video, this was the player, parentheses S, making the sounds themselves.

No, zero chance.

Zero chance.

Zero chance.

Zero chance.

Play it again.

No.

Play it again.

All right.

Play it again.

Nah, man.

We were open shot, so just our sharing the ball and our energy was great.

Why do you think?

Okay.

Okay, moving on.

I mean, every time I hear it, every time I hear it, my soul, I relate to the poor guy who was talking and tries to

moving.

Okay, well,

it's like it makes him seem like it was his, like his fault.

Let's jag that volume up and let's play it again.

We were open shot, so Andrews are sharing the ball and our energy was great.

What do you think?

Okay.

Okay, moving on.

His face is so funny.

So I know the guy that said the okay, moving on.

That's Tim McMahon.

Oh, yeah.

That's Tim McMahon.

Yeah, that's Tim McMahon, the ESPN reporter.

And so after that happened, he joined a sports funder.

And, you know, you like check mics ahead of time and stuff before you go on air.

And I was like, I was like, can I tell you my working theory on what happened?

He was like, yeah, tell me.

I was like, I think.

That someone that works at the Mavs who's, you know, sometimes your Bluetooth, if you've used it before, automatically connects to speakers.

I think he's in the back.

Yeah.

Right.

I think he's in the back.

I think he's watching a little porn because like he doesn't care about this press conference, like whatever.

And it accidentally goes over the Bluetooth speakers.

He realizes, oh my God, he fumbles with it.

He presses off.

Tim McMahon, now this was a week ago, Pablo.

Yeah.

Tim McMahon said exactly what you just said.

He said he thinks and was hearing that it was a prank that was played, that they were very intentionally did it to throw Luca off and that someone like tapped into the Bluetooth speaker.

Oh, but he's on the speaker, the Bluetooth theory.

He's still on the speaker theory, that it was that someone tapped into the speaker, they played the porn to make it uncomfortable, and then they promptly turned it off.

I still stand on the fact that some poor, unsuspecting, like tow boy was like in the, like Calm's kid was like in the back thinking he's watching a little innocent.

See, I think it's that, but that they had a tab open that they forgot about.

And when they opened up their lap, like it just went and they were like, yeah, yeah.

And tried to get it.

Because watching porn at work.

is weird.

Yeah.

And don't do it.

Yeah.

Why?

So much time in the day.

Yeah, sure.

I also feel like if you're going to pull a prank, not that I'm like a porn audio connoisseur, but I just feel like there's funnier

clips of a porn you could play.

This is why

her saying words.

This is why I returned to the player.

To it being a player.

Yes, because this is some.

I was talking to Nadir behind the glass over there.

Not to put Nadir on blast.

Shout out to Nadir.

But I was playing this clip for him before the show, and he was like, oh, I used to do that in middle school.

Not him, not I.

Sorry, Nadir.

But kids in our middle school used to do that.

Yeah.

Like make moaning sex noises because that is what boys do.

That's a female voice.

I'm sorry.

I could see it not being one, but here's what I think you need is the next step of your investigation.

You got to get all the mavs to moan.

Oh, like a police lineup.

Yeah.

And they all, you have to be like, say, uh, uh, uh, and then they have to do it and see who can hit that

specific octave.

Yeah.

See, I, it's giving, it's giving woman to me.

I like I feel like I pride myself on being able to do voices and impersonations and to imitate people.

Just give us your best one, just real quick, to vouch for you.

Journalistically.

Just give us your best one.

You pride yourself on it.

So just give us your best one.

I know.

I also pride myself on not being put on the spot, Katie.

Okay, so that's we can cut that out.

Yeah, no, I mean, it's more of a...

Maybe Katie can go first.

It's more into like, you can give me a person that they're like, let me go.

I just, I'm definitely not feeling that that was a man imitating a woman.

That was a woman moaning.

In fact, Pablo, you're a man.

Oh, God.

Allegedly.

I was dreading this.

Yeah, you try to give us such a moment.

Try to hit that on the spot.

Try to hit that hole on the spot.

Try to hit it.

I've been trying to back away from the mic.

I've been trying to speak deeper into my diary.

Sure, but that's, but for now, yes, go up in tears.

Yeah, they're all men that have, these guys are six foot ten.

They've got these deep voices.

You go for it.

Try to be heard.

All right.

So I'm going to actually not make icons either as I was looking at.

I'm going to look away.

Face the other way.

Okay, you got it.

I just want you to know that Metalark HR does not exist, so you cannot get me in trouble for this.

I'm gonna look at Katie, which is kind of weirder.

Don't peek.

Okay, goddamn.

I can't even look at myself.

I can't look at myself.

I can't look at the glass because everyone's looking at me.

Stop waving at me.

All right, here we go.

Here we go.

Here we go.

Here we go.

Louder.

See, it's loud.

It's more scream.

You can't.

Yes, it's all fall set up.

It's all fall set up.

It has to have some.

Yeah.

Oh, God.

I hate it.

He's in danger.

Yeah, he sounds like a damner.

No, that was.

No, you sound like an animal.

Don't make it's going to get better.

No.

No.

No.

Okay.

You sound like a dying animal.

A dolphin.

I sound like a dolphin.

See?

That's not it.

I mean, line all the men up.

Y'all can't hit that octave.

I know that octave.

Cortez.

Get in here, Cortez.

Cortez, come moan into this microphone.

Hold my mic mic and moan on it.

Cortez, you can't do it.

Cortez says, quote, this is what you're here for.

Come on, Cortez.

Cortez, come in here.

Do it.

Do it.

Do it.

Do it.

Do it.

Damn, peer pressure doesn't work.

Wow.

That sucks.

Wow.

But you get my point, Pablo.

You tried, but like it sounded like a man imitating a woman.

It's a skill.

Okay, he's in here.

Yes.

Arms crossed.

We point every microphone at cortez everybody turn around okay

okay wait a second it was better than popping

it better than popping okay wait a second i somehow feel worse and better about

myself yeah that was not that was more convincing His was better than yours.

More convincing.

But you guys are making my argument.

That's not a man pretending to be a woman.

That's not.

That was a woman.

That was a woman.

So unless they got a female staffer, that was actual porn that they were playing.

Or Cortez.

Or Cortez.

Or Cortez was there.

Could be that.

I don't know.

I guess I could see it.

I could see it, but

ironically, I'm unsatisfied with this conclusion.

I feel like

I want it to be more like, yeah, it was a person and it was this person.

Yeah, I was looking for clues on like the Twitter accounts of like PJ Washington.

Were they like sending us signals and stuff?

Yeah, nothing.

So no eggplant emojis or anything.

That's what you were looking for?

Yeah.

During my deep dive and investigation, I was trolling for some eggplant emojis or a peach.

He had to watch a couple videos to see if he could find that specific clip.

If anyone's wondering,

the charges to his credit card.

He was looking for the clip.

And he had his eyes closed.

He was just listening.

Yeah.

Just trying to see.

Just trying to listen.

Yeah.

You know what?

Next time when you're investigating, see if you can find the exact porn clip.

Yeah.

You know, just like watch tons of it, right?

That's what I'm saying.

Watch tons tons of it and then just close your eyes and then you're like, that's the moan.

This is the clip.

Found it.

Triggering for some of us to hear a Bluetooth porn.

Yeah.

We've really just,

do you know this?

You know, no.

What happened?

Dan has a joke in his special that is very much based on truth of a time during the pandemic that we, I was showering, getting ready for highly questionable, actually, an HQ from home.

And in the shower, I was listening to music and a Bluetooth speaker that he bought me But because he had linked up with that Bluetooth speaker before his phone accidentally linked up with it while he was watching an adult video So I am in the shower and he was doing journalism and all of a sudden my music became like moaning and a lot of like this

And I remember just being like what the hell and then I like picked it up and I kind of was realizing what was happening and I started like hitting the volume down button on it to get it to be quiet.

But because he was watching it and there was no volume and he was confused, he kept hitting the volume up button and so it just kept getting louder

and I felt like I was being bullied so then I just had to like turn the whole thing off and then I had to like finish my shower and then as I'm about to open the door I'm like I just I don't want to deal with this right now you know exactly what was happening I'm like something I figured something had happened that like that.

And so I'm like, I'm going to come out the door.

And he's going to just be standing there.

And I don't want to have this conversation.

And I don't want to like make eye contact and talk about it.

Like, I just want him to leave me alone.

And so I open the door and he comes around the corner and he goes, Hey, just to like see if I realize, because maybe there was a world in which I didn't realize what had happened.

Yeah, that world that was not one we lived in.

And he said, Hey, and I just like looked at him and he goes, I um, I opened an email,

those dreaded porn emails.

And I was like, Can we do this later?

And he was like, Yeah,

thanks, cool, thanks, cool, thanks.

I opened an email, I opened an email.

Somebody sent me a link.

It was weird, it was so so weird.

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I was watching L Duncan pose with Kim Kardashian.

Weren't we all?

And I don't know how we've waited this long to talk about it.

Yeah, um, so apologies for for making you talk about this, but what

happened?

Yeah, so we're at Disney Up Fronts.

For the people that don't know what that is, it's basically just like this big presentation.

You guys know, but it's this big presentation where you know, Disney's like, look at all the cool things we have, spend all your money with us, buy all our ads up, like whatever.

And we had done rehearsal, uh, me, Chaneagumake, and Andrea Carter, because we were going to bring Don Staly up.

The big three, sorry, as everybody, The big three.

So we knew in rehearsal that we were going to be coming off stage like right before Kim Kardashian was going onstage.

So Andrea, when it was happening in real time, was like, hey, like, let's get a picture with Kim Kardashian.

Like, I want to get a picture with Kim K.

I was like, all right.

So we sort of stalked the backstage when we got off stage and she couldn't have been nicer.

She comes down.

She, she had not yet, because Kim Kardashian, as you can imagine, travels with about 50 people.

I was going to say, was she flanked by a ton of, I've never, I don't think I could ever picture her walking alone to go do something.

Yeah, were you wandered before you could encounter her?

No, that's why it was shocking because she normally has so many people with her, but they were all waiting.

Like we got her right when she came off stage.

So no one was there.

And we're like, can we get a picture?

She's like, of course.

And I'm going to do my best, Kim K.

And so, you know, we take this picture.

And then, you know, at first we're like, oh no, like, did we do something wrong?

And then she's like, let's do a kissy face one.

We were like, oh, she's into this.

Like now she wants to like do some different poses.

Like this is cool.

So also the pressure is kind of on.

At least it would be for me.

Yeah.

That's always the awkward thing, right?

When you meet someone famous and you take the picture, it's like, how do we end this?

Like, how do we do that now what?

How are we disembarking?

Yeah.

Thanks.

Thanks so much, buddy.

So Drea, Drea, exactly.

Appreciate you.

She seems like a high-five type of girl.

So Drea goes,

I saw Norse video playing basketball, right?

I was like, there you go, Dre, connection connection point, right?

We're last of all.

We're here for basketball.

Veteran move.

Good stuff.

And, you know, Kim's like, oh, yeah, she loves basketball.

And like, she's really like working to be better at basketball.

And the thing that was like hitting me in real time is, because when you go to upfronts, it really is just this like.

cacophony of like some sports people and movie stars and TV people.

And I think we pride ourselves on knowing all of them.

There were so many people where I had to look at like Dre and Sine and be like, he's on TV.

He stars in this.

Like they didn't know who they were.

It was a lot of Googling.

But when those groups mix, they are really separate ecosystems.

And so when they mix, just watching the inability to recognize who people are was spectacular.

And so as Kim is talking about her daughter, like wanting to improve and get better at dribbling and stuff like that, Don Staley, who's standing there, of course, Hall of Famer, is like, I can help her with that.

And Kim's like, you can.

I was like, oh, she doesn't know.

I was like, she doesn't know.

I was like, she doesn't realize that she is talking to like those four.

Did somebody let her know?

Great as coach.

Probably not because it was just us standing there.

You can.

Yeah.

And what's Dawn's response to that?

She's like, sure, she was just like, yeah, of course I can.

I mean, you're not going to be like.

You know who I am.

You know who I am.

That's not Coach Staley at all.

So, so, but Kim could not have been nicer.

She talked about her son and how he's just like really naturally like gifted at playing basketball and how her daughter doesn't really like for Kim and Kanye to come to her games because she doesn't love all the attention.

She wants to focus, right?

Right.

Right.

And she's like, we totally respect it.

She's like, but my son is like, bring it, bring the camera crews, bring everybody.

I'm about to show out.

And so it was good.

It was a really good conversation.

And then I, another veteran savvy move, I think, is that once you sort of have this like conversation with someone, like you've got to be the one, as the lesser famous person, you have to be the one to eject, right?

Like you want to quit before they fit you and make it awkward.

So after she finished talking for a second, I just kind of jumped in and was like, well, Kim, thank you so much for chatting with us.

And

hopefully one day we're talking about your children on ESPN, trying to make another connection point.

We're not just fans.

We are in television.

We are people that are important if you were to care.

I clearly knew stars, but you should.

We were like, we love skims.

I might have thrown out, I'm wearing a skims bra.

Great.

Which I was.

It was a little fancy girlish.

True.

So you didn't lie.

Yeah.

Skims is cool.

But I think the most relatable thing and the thing that I really appreciated about Kim is

within seconds of her leaving the stage, she was in a pair of flip-flops.

Now, they were probably jiuvenchy or something fancy, but she had taken those heels off and she was in some straight-up flip-flops.

And I was like, Yes, sister, thank you.

See, I would think that she, of all people, would be one of those.

You know, people are always like, when you wear heels enough, your feet almost mold to them and get used to them.

And so you almost, they're comfortable, they're more comfortable than being flat.

I would think that she would just live in a heel.

Sure.

Like her foot has naturally barbied itself.

Yes.

Yeah.

Yes.

I picture her exactly with a Barbie foot.

When she takes a shoe off, it's like, we stay.

It's just hilarious.

Yeah.

No, she was, she was in flip-flops.

Well, good for her.

Her hair and makeup were all around her by then, but really, really nice, really, really nice lady.

She does, I think,

sit atop the world rankings of people that I might encounter who don't feel like real humans to me.

Like there's I would have, I'd have to remind myself while interacting with her that like, this is a person,

not an animal at a a zoo.

Yeah, I didn't think I could encounter you in the wild.

Yeah, you've been seeing, I've seen you so much that I feel like I'm entitled to knowing you, even though I have no, I've never met you.

So meeting somebody like that, you're always like, how do I interact with you?

Because I know so much about you, but I know nothing about you.

Right.

Right.

It's like seeing Joe Biden.

Like, what?

You're here.

We don't get invited to the White House, Pablo, so that flex is really unnecessary.

Do you see him?

Did you see?

Do you hear this?

It's like meeting Joe Biden.

It's like meeting a president.

Me and Joe Biden making kissy face photos.

Let me tell you, the angles that we popped.

You were wearing his bra as well, and you let him know.

You said this is a Biden.

His drop waist

was

magisterial.

I do also feel like if I'm Kim Kardashian, though, I mean, I've made a lot of different choices in my life, but if I'm Kim Kardashian, being seen as nice is probably the easiest.

Sure.

Because you just have to smile and make small talk.

If we were to have this conversation 10 years ago, I would have made like five jokes about sex tapes.

I would have done, I would have laughed in ways that I'm just like now I just look at her and I'm like, you are the apex predator of the food chain.

Yeah.

Like she is atop the ecosystem.

Everybody is trying to be like her.

And even if there are reasons to look at Kim Kardashian and her empire and be like, but this is empty and hollow and superficial.

It's like, but also everybody is trying to be you.

The influencer economy was premised on Kim Kardashian and Katie Noll's making a face.

Yeah, because I'm thinking, I'm like, I don't, but I'm trying to critically

look at what you're saying.

I don't personally.

You tried to be Kim Kardashian.

You were the first person I thought of.

You were desperately trying to be Kim Kardashian.

I did leak my own sex,

allegedly.

Ooh, no one saw it.

Yeah.

And also, no one's rushing to see it.

Take down the paywall.

Yeah.

That's probably a good start.

I don't think it'll help.

You know what?

Here's the thing.

Here's the thing from someone who is, and I mean this, I don't wear it like as a badge of honor.

I just don't care.

I have never seen a single episode of Keeping Up with the Kardashians, not in 20 years.

Okay, so

but the ways in which we're all trying to do this,

reality television, right?

Owning your own content such that you are now able to create franchises, celebrities selling things, using a social media-driven audience is literally the game that I think all of us are implicitly playing, even if we don't want to be considered like in the Kardashian coaching tree.

The idea that they went from sort of, yes, reality stars with sex tapes, the joke was they have no discernible talent, they're just famous for being famous, whatever.

And they've really turned that into lucrative businesses.

Like they've turned that into the attention economy, like they personify that.

Yeah.

And so the idea, like, and so the criticism of like they don't have any talent, it's like, okay, so why aren't you them?

Yeah.

Person who's trying to harness attention to capitalistic ends.

I resent the competition that they're trying to win.

I think that's your like, because I'm trying, I'm like, I don't agree with what you're saying.

I don't value them as much as it sounds like you do, but it's because

I resent that game, the game of like being

looked at versus being seen.

Like I feel like any, you know, people who make their whole thing is just to be.

looked at everywhere they go, but don't once you look at them, they're not like, now that I have your attention, here's something important or here's something that I that matters to me it's more just like no keep looking keep looking don't look away I'm over here now look over here look over here like that's they can do that

and they are winning that I hate that that's how it operates I hate that it's just about getting us to look at you

and that but I do think they've been done a good job the Kardashians of like just being famous punching bags of just like letting people make fun of them that's a great relentlessly like in a world where there's barely any mana culture left, they're like one of the last, like you say Kardashian, and no one goes, who?

They know who that is, which means that we all have a shared experience, which means they can be, they're one of the few things that we can all make fun of.

They're like a cultural reference point.

And they just kind of let us do that.

So the Tom Brady roast, Kim Kardashian goes up there and is booed.

I know a lot of people make fun of your hype.

All right.

all right, whoa, whoa, whoa, all right, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

And she seems unbothered in terms of just like, so, so in the moment, it's like, that must suck.

But the idea of being unbothered to the point of, do you think she's going to start showing up to places less?

No.

She actually, I think after that, showed up to like three more places the next day.

She's been flipping.

Yeah, and then did the Disney upfront.

Yeah, did the Disney upfronts, then did the Met Gallup.

Yeah.

Right.

And so just the idea of that sort of elephant skin of, and I think this is where I relate completely to what Katie is saying is

the invitation of like, look at me and whatever your gaze is doing, I will find a way to use that to my benefit, even if it feels to you like it's empty and vacuous or whatever.

And what I marvel at is most people just melt.

Yeah.

And if I got booed, I would melt.

And the skill that you need in this modern, strange dystopian, I say dystopian so so much on this show.

I apologize, but it's the only word I can use as a shortcut to just like, in a world where everything feels like there is a fundamental sadness inside at the core of it, the way to handle that sadness is to just not care as much.

It's to ignore it.

Or ignore it and to not feel it in that way.

And I'm like, yeah, look, it's that thing about playing.

Playing sports in New York.

I'm like, why do I marvel at athletes who can really thrive in New York City?

It's because the spotlight melts you.

And Kim Paradashin is like, hey, would you mind pointing every conceivable spotlight at me?

Yeah.

And I'm going to actually be more powerful because of it.

That's what I'm really impressed by, is that she is sort of like perfectly suited for this strange world in which

that video of her sister cutting a cucumber.

Have you seen that?

Kendall Jenner cutting a cucumber?

Oh my God.

What?

Kendall.

This hand.

I don't know what's happening.

The rusty trombone approach.

Nothing to say.

Holding a cucumber.

I mean, that's on you, mom.

You never taught her how to cut a cucumber.

Left hand holding the butt end of the cucumber.

The logic of it.

And the right hand with the knife, yeah.

How did your brain not even go, well, I should keep my hand as far away as possible from the knife.

And I want to hold it in place, so I should probably.

Well, that was probably her first time using a butcher's knife.

And I want to figure out, like, am I impressed fundamentally because there is a skill to how they play the game or because, as I was alluding to before, it's actually just they're so big that whatever they do, it works.

I think they're playing the game with a skill that others would not play it with.

I think how they, the moves they're making now, I'm just like, it's working.

So, the fact that 20 years in, Kim Kardashian is like the most famous, one of the three most famous people in America.

I'd say on the planet.

On the planet.

I think that's, if that's the game, like, would

you give anybody

the position on third base, let's say, and the various legs up that she has had?

And would they have done the same thing?

Legs up, not pun intended.

It's hard for me to separate.

Well, if you were watching the video, there was a lot of actually like knees to happen.

I was gonna say, I don't think their legs were up that much.

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I think we should do one more topic.

I feel like my topic isn't as cool.

We've had such fun with these topics.

So here

we have a dealer's choice.

Cause I feel like.

Oh, you want to do the in-sync thing?

Whichever one of you guys want to do.

I don't have that much to say, just that, like, I don't want it.

Yeah, I don't either.

I don't have much to say either.

So let's do yours.

But I also do think, and this is just for us, that like when Justin initially announced that tour, everybody thought it was an in-sync thing because of the, like, they did like a big reunion.

And then the big announcement was a Justin Timberlake tour.

And then that tour flopped.

And everybody was saying the reason that flopped is because they wanted an in-sync tour.

So now they're going to give us this in-sync something or other.

And I think they're just misreading the room.

I think it's like, yeah, no, we wanted that thing then.

You gave us the wrong thing.

And now we're moving on.

Yeah.

We're not.

I don't want it.

I don't want it.

Yeah.

I loved.

Girl.

Like, I literally was like, like, f ⁇ you backstreet boys.

Like, they made me sick.

Yes.

I was TRL.

I'm like, how the f ⁇ are you number one?

Oh, my God.

It's bye-bye bye for me.

I was team in sync.

But like now my children are being introduced to Justin Timberlake because he's the trolls dude.

He's branch from Trolls, right?

And this last movie, Trolls 3, like was all about boy bands.

And that's really honestly what told me no one wants this.

Like their songs aren't good anymore.

They did an original song called Better Place.

And like it's canon for three-year-olds.

Like three-year-olds like it, which means

no thank you.

It's of a time.

Boy bands are very of a time.

And they perfectly, like I was thinking about this the other day that I am grateful that my childhood, my adolescence intersected with the boy band era the way that it did.

Because like, what a cool time to be like a 12-year-old girl who's like, oh my God, a collection of, I mean, only like a couple of them were ever hot.

It's very funny that we always acted like they were like five hot boys.

They were not.

I don't know, Chris Kirkpatrick.

I was going to say, I don't know.

I just don't know.

But I guess by that logic of like, you put a couple of things.

Somewhere Joy Faton's best pumping.

Yeah.

Yeah.

He wasn't the one I mentioned, but.

He's among.

Yeah.

And so I just feel like it was great when it was.

Even though it's the greatest it's ever been something's missing things suck and we're all looking in the past to bring back that feeling.

Correct.

Not realizing that that feeling was not as attached to the thing as we think it was.

And that like, if you want that feeling, go back and listen to their old music.

Yes.

Like I recently re-downloaded old in sync albums and like.

I still do shower with music against my better judgment.

I listened to like a full album, no strings attached, while I took a shower.

And I was like, this is so fun.

I haven't heard these songs in so long.

Wait, how long are your showers?

Well, I didn't do the whole thing, probably, but they're pretty.

This was an everything shower.

This was pretty long.

Oh, yeah.

Gotcha.

This is one of those Sunday ones.

And so I, um, and like that brought me back to like, oh my God, I remember being on like my boom box, putting my CD in and like trying little dances in my room.

And then my brother would come in and be like, leave me alone.

And I'd go back to my dance.

Like, it brought me back.

I don't want that.

I don't want them to try to recreate that.

No.

It's not going to hit the same.

No.

It's just going to make me feel old.

Correct.

It's, yes, it makes them look old.

Like,

like, they can't dance like that anymore.

They can't dance like that anymore.

And like they still do.

Like it was never more obvious to me than like, and New Edition was a little bit before my time, but like obviously I knew New Edition.

And I went and saw them perform at Essence Festival a couple of years ago.

And it just was like so freaking cringy to watch these 60-year-old men in matching bedazzled suits, still trying to hit moves.

Like it was just, I felt sad.

I felt sad.

I didn't feel nostalgic.

I didn't feel sentimental.

It was like, oh, God, y'all are still out here with your old ass age, out here still trying to like have girls dancing on you.

I saw Ronald Isley recently.

You guys, he's 90 years old and he's performing and he's like, he's like grinding his hips and there's these young girls dancing around him.

And I just, I was like sad.

They should have to be 90 as well.

Right.

The girls dancing on you should also have to be 90.

If you're going to keep working, let them keep working.

Thank you.

Why do you get to have little girls dancing on you?

Maybe, I don't know.

I don't want to accuse him of something.

Maybe they were like of age, but not his age.

No, they were like 30, but like, was, you know, that's gross when you're 90.

Huge gap.

Yeah.

And it just, yeah, like, it just is not, it's not, it's not the thing.

It's not the vibe.

I'm with you.

Like, it's been cool for my daughter to be introduced to Justin Timberlake now through trolls.

And I have, I've played for her, like, I want you back.

And I hit some of the dance moves in the kitchen and like stuff like that.

But the idea that we need a new album, like, no, we don't.

Stop it.

Live forever on the shit you've already done.

But like, I'm not out here actively seeking new new music all the time i'm certainly not seeking it from people who already made the music that i liked yeah and have not spoken to each other or hung out that's not like justin tiber like spent a lot of time with them i was gonna ask about that how much of this is about oh here's a group of guys who relate to each other and hang out and i like to see them like be friends i never really thought that they were that close of friends I don't know if I was supposed to.

I don't know if that's a part of the lore I missed out on, but I never was like, those five guys love each other, especially when Justin took off and literally took off.

Like, he did.

And Lance Bass also took off for space.

For space.

Yeah.

I always felt like JC Shazé resented Justin Timberlake.

I was a JT guy because he could.

Because were you?

I was always a JT guy.

So JC Shazé, the legend of him is that he could sing better than Justin.

Is that part of the lore?

Supposedly.

He claimed it.

He was just, you know, he was the brunette.

He was the like, the, I think he might have been shorter.

And he was, he could dance.

He could sing.

He was, um, he was less appreciated and therefore felt like you could say he was underrated even if he was properly rated wow there is a whole reddit thread of jc shaze should have been more famous successful that's right than just did he have a solo career and what was the song because if he did i definitely heard the song and i liked it

so he did that so he did that song i mean it was technically in sync but it was really only jc that was singing on it with your black yes Of course I do.

My thug appeal.

And they did call.

Yeah.

He said he had thug appeal, which was a single thing.

Well, Tristan has also done quite a bit of, have you you heard the britney spears memoir when she tells the story about when they ran into genuine on the street and that he code switched and they here's the thing it's read by you can probably find this clip it's read by michelle williams so the who we knew as

the dawson's creek girl oh yeah is the is the narrator of her audiobook and in this she's reading britney spears recounting justin timberlake code switching talking to genuine it's like the most amazing like late 90s early 2000s mad lib and and i think she said that he was like walking our way way was a guy with a huge blinged out medallion.

He was flanked by two giant security guards.

Jay got all excited and said so loud, oh yeah, fauches, fauches, genuine.

What's up, homie?

I have found my new ringtone.

Incredible.

Oh

my gosh.

Incredible.

That's so great.

Fauches, fauches, genuine.

He has since denied it, I think.

He said that never happened.

He used to have that presumption of diplomatic immunity, right?

Like that was the thing about, oh, he can dance, he's cool, he's like, and he's funny.

So, yeah, that was me defending.

That was me getting defensive of JC.

Yes, he did say thug appeal.

He did have a soundtrack, a sound, a sound, he did have a song on the soundtrack for drumline, JC Shaza.

And what was it called?

Blowing me up, parentheses, with her love.

Oh, I absolutely know this song.

Ego.

Uh-uh-oh, blowing me up with her love.

Okay, yeah, remember.

A jam.

Wow.

There are a lot of trucker hats that he's donning now.

Remember that?

Remember the Von Dutch era?

Yes.

Oh.

Ed Hardy.

Oh.

Bedazzled jeans.

Yikes.

If I were them and they

called me back in now that Justin Timberleg's flopping and they were part of an in-sync album, I'd be like, no.

I'm busy.

But are you?

No.

Joey Fateau.

I believe.

But I am.

I like the idea of JC Shazé like straightening his back and being like, I'm going to let this phone ring a couple times.

And then answer it.

And then absolutely answer it.

Cause that's the dynamic.

When I talk about the dynamic between those guys, those five guys, as if they're like a sports team, I'm like, the reunion, it's like, okay, there's ego management.

Yes.

And also they all, let's be honest, they all need it.

And so the question of like, does Justin Timberlake need it is secondary to the idea of how badly does Chris Kirkpatrick needs this so bad?

What does he look like now?

He doesn't still have

changed into being like the hottest.

He has a body.

Yeah.

He got invisible let's find out i don't want to be mean to who can confirm that no i don't want to be mean all right so but we're just saying probably not

he's just a guy he's he's a guy he's just a guy living the dream who was the ugliest hoping to live the dream backstreet boys the ugliest one in backstreet boys

i feel like oh yeah i mean i personally was not a big fan of his sharpie eyebrows so i would say aj mclean yeah wasn't a big fan of he was considered a hot boy though yeah i know which is weird because he was almost like their chris kirkpatrick he was Howie, maybe?

Howie was just so forgettable.

Yeah.

He was pretty forgettable.

I was always a big Brian Lattrell fan.

I wasn't really into Nick.

That's like a...

Brian Luttrell is like

a fake Justin Timberlake.

Yeah.

And she

loved it.

I loved Justin Timberlake.

Yes.

Justin Timberfake.

Yes.

As he's been called.

He's not bad looking for.

I mean, he was always just kind of like a creative character that you hadn't done anything to yet.

He always just kind of looked like the template, you know?

It's like, and then you make the man on top of it, but they forgot to keep going.

What did we find out today?

Oh, so much.

We found out that there's too many, we had too many topics.

I don't know how you're going to edit those down.

So I don't want to say that I found anything out that we might not leave in.

I found out Pablo moans weird.

Wow.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I found out Pablo's sex noises.

Hold on.

That's not my actual...

What I found out is that I'm being slandered as somebody who makes those noises organically.

I didn't learn sh ⁇ .

I'm just kidding.

It's fair.

I'm just kidding.

I learned

that

Katie and Dan have a very relatable relationship.

Thank you.

Thank you so much.

I love that about you.

I'll never look at those Bluetooth shower heads again.

They're dangerous.

I'll never look at them.

You need to talk about the threat they pose to relationships.

I'm never going to look at emails the same again.

We have two different Bluetooth speakers now.

So he links to his and I link to mine, and we do not cross.

See, that's growth.

Yeah.

That's just growth and evolution.

It's just looking out for myself.

Future me.

Yeah, it is.

And I also, same.

I learned that Pablo cannot imitate a female pretending to be having great sex.

I think mine was more accurate.

You sound weird when you have sex.

I don't know how to refute this accusation.

Yeah, unfortunately.

Unfortunately, we'll never really know.

Yeah.

I think you should still make them all moan, though.

You got to go make them Okay, what I really found out is that I challenged PJ Washington

to moan on tape for us.

That sounds bad, but go with me.

Yeah, um, I need him to do his best, um, you know, his best, his best sex noise.

In a world where there are BJs and HJs,

technically, PJ could be a term for sex.

Yeah.

Ooh, what would it be?

Like, what, what would it up?

she knew it too quick

why is it so

it's got

now you want to do more huh down here but like

push from your stomach but high pitch

okay that's awful that makes me so

uncomfortable

it was the way it was like a question yeah he did he was like do I

is this good I could hear your lip quivering am I liking it yeah did we cut this yeah he was a shaky girl he's shaking

dude.

I don't know.

It's not good, though.

I'm like,

it's giving me a lot of feelings, but not good ones.

No, I think we're done.

Oh, God.

He just keeps shaking while he does it.

Oh, God.

Thank God he didn't say, Are you finished?

That would be a lot worse.

A lot worse.

Are we done?

It's fine.

Oh, my God.

This is my favorite show.

I regret.

I regret.

I regret doing that.

However, Pablo Torre finds out is produced by Michael Antonucci, Ryan Cortez, Sam Dawig, Juan Galindo, Patrick Kim, Neely Loman, Rachel Miller-Howard, Ethan Schreier, Carl Scott, Matt Sullivan, Chris Tumanello, and Juliet Wara.

Our studio engineering by RG Systems, our post-production by NGW Post, our theme song by John Bravo, as always.

My voice now deep in my diaphragm, thanks to Boog Xiambi.

We will talk to you

on Tuesday.