Donkey Kong 65 // In This Economy? [65]

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Hello, and welcome to another episode of the Regulation Podcast.

This is number 65.

My name is Jeff Ramsey with me, as always.

Andrew Banton, Gavin Free, Nick Schwartz, Eric Medour.

Hello, boys.

Hello.

What's the best 65 thing?

If you get a 65 of anything, what would be the best 65 thing?

That isn't just like gold bars.

Isn't there a

like Thunder Kiss 65 or something?

It's like a Rob Zombie song.

Is there?

I don't know anything.

I only know Rob Zombie's film career.

I couldn't tell you anything about his music.

Honestly, honestly, if you told him that, I think he would be like thrilled.

I think he would be so stoked on that.

He was like...

Well,

let's avoid my opinions on 90% of his work.

But yeah, I was about to say,

which mediocre lane do you want to

go in there with him?

I enjoyed the devil's rejects, but like everything else is.

I liked one shot of that movie.

That was about it.

I like Walton Goggins in the first movie.

He's good.

Yeah.

Walton Goggins was cool.

He's great.

I mean, he's great in everything.

65, though.

What would you not?

I wouldn't want 65.

I was trying to think 65 frogs, but I think I wouldn't want 65 frogs.

That'd be too many frogs.

See, my first thing was bananas.

I wouldn't want 65 bananas, but I've been playing a lot of Donkey Kong, so I feel like that goes against my current want.

It's weird.

I don't like bananas, but I feel a desire to have bananas right now.

And in my head, it's a sequel to Donkey Kong 64, so it is, in fact, Donkey Kong 65.

Oh, Donkey Kong 64.

Honestly, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Also, that's the first half of the title for this episode is Donkey Kong 65.

I'm so excited about that.

Trixie was dual-wielding back then.

What are we going to do for the sequel?

What are we going to promote?

It's the big new thing.

Tri-wielding, quad-wielding?

Deca-wield.

Deka wield.

Well,

they're monkeys.

They can hold guns in their feet.

Oh, and their tail.

A tail gun.

Yeah.

Could a chimp hold five guns if it used all legs and a tail?

No.

No, a chimp doesn't have a tail.

Oh, wait, well, does it not?

Does Trixie not have a tail?

That's a good point.

They just got those red asses, don't they?

Or is that a different?

That's a baboon.

See, on the backside of a lot of these primates, I get all tangled up at each other.

You're telling me.

You're telling me you want one of these guys to hold a gun.

They ain't got no tail, dude.

That could hold four guns, though.

He can, but you said five with a tail.

Yeah, well, I'm redacting tail because I was clearly thinking of some sort of spider monkey or something.

Maybe a mouth gun.

Oh, could it could have a mouth gun?

i've never seen a mouth gun i'm thinking of all the guns i've seen i've never seen a mouth gun i'm gonna show you i'm gonna show you a picture of this monkey i just dropped a monkey pick in there that's a monkey holding five guns that's a five gun monkey that's a five gun monkey i think that monkey's got a five star wand raining i think if there was a sequel to dunston checks in there would have been a scene where rupert everett holds Dunstan out of a car window and he's holding four guns.

Hell yeah.

Dunstan checks out.

Yeah.

He's got to fight his way through every floor of the hotel.

It's like the reverse raid.

It's backwards raid.

He's in the penthouse and he's trying to leave.

Oh, that'd be awesome.

How have they not done a reverse raid?

What are you doing, Dunstan?

Check it out.

I guess the professional is kind of the reverse raid.

That's essentially the same.

The last act of that movie.

I think the maybe the raid is the reverse professional.

Oh,

it's got old natalie portman there you go

full circle

wow i'm glad we're back we're back didn't expect to start the day off with monkey guns but i'm glad we did it's been a minute since we've recorded do we have does anybody have anything pressing that they want to go over i know we've got i've got a billion notes but a lot of them are related to other to y'all directly Andrew assigned me some work while I was briefly in San Francisco.

I did?

Oh.

Yeah.

I was giving you shit for not being present.

I don't remember this.

What did I do?

Not being present.

Oh, promotion?

Was it promotion?

No, no, actually, you gave me a lot of shit about a lot of things.

One of the tasks you gave me.

Put them on your side.

I flew back from England and I went to San Francisco for an event.

And I woke up.

It was one of those waking ups where I don't really know where I am.

So I'm looking around being like, what place am I in?

Figured it out.

Looked at a text from Andrew saying, hey, can you make me a grounded two thumbnail?

Oh, yeah.

This happens all the time, but continue.

So

I made it, and I don't think he appreciated it.

Oh, I loved it.

I thought it was fantastic.

He didn't.

He didn't use it or anything.

What the?

No, we're going to use that in the future.

We are.

Yeah, probably for this episode.

It's amazing that this hasn't happened before.

If I'm texting both of you things simultaneously, there are times, and it hasn't gotten noticed yet, where I am talking to one of you thinking I'm talking to the other.

It has happened several times.

So what you're saying is Gavin and I are essentially interchangeable to you.

Something about, I think you guys both have the same color logo thing on my phone, and it's both Gs.

So there are definite times where I'll get a text and I'll go like,

this is an odd text from Gavin.

And then I'll realize later, oh, it's Jeff.

Okay.

Or the other way.

But yeah, I've definitely talked to you guys via text, thinking I was talking to the other person.

So I came up with that with like one eye half shut from sleep still.

It was great.

I feel like I was there for you just in case.

I really appreciated it.

That's a master.

I feel stupid for making the other thumbnail because I didn't know Gavin made this one.

Well, you know,

I figured this could be used whenever.

This is a classic thumbnail.

This is timeless art.

maybe that's maybe that is our official like if i'm out of town and there's nobody to make the thumbnail that's our placeholder thumbnail for stuff that's like our technical difficulties thumbnail

yeah we could just write over it like it's the da vinci or the caprio canvas it'll be like your canvas whenever you show us a drawing and you've got like the microphone you just keep writing over it just cross out the whole canvas yeah you just keep putting new things in

till it runs out of space i like that idea pressing though i know i don't don't think I have anything too pressing.

What about you, Jeff?

Oh, man.

I got like four episodes worth of notes here.

We've been busy.

We could talk Office.

We could talk Sunday swims and the 500 ideas we came up with.

We could talk pinball machines.

We could talk flat sandwiches.

Can we talk pinball machine first?

Because I'm so, I just, I'm so confused by it still.

And Nick saw it for the first time today.

Oh, did you notice that, Nick?

Nope.

Scared the shit out of me.

It spooked all of us.

I think we've all been surprised differently.

No one has said anything to anyone about it, which is like,

I think that says a lot for us where it's like, this must be a surprise.

for an episode that I'm not, I don't want to be the one to spoil.

So no one said anything and it has just led to so much confusion.

When Emily took me in to see it initially at like nine o'clock at night, she came up with some bullshit excuse about how she needed some tool that I'd left at the office.

So I had to drive her there because she was like setting up a pearl set or something.

And I walked in and I saw it.

And I looked at her and I said, Am I supposed to see this?

Am I supposed to know about this?

And she's like, it's for you, idiot.

Yes.

I'm taking you to see it.

We all have the exact same reaction.

We're like, am I supposed to be looking at this right now?

Should I pretend like I haven't seen it?

I actually said that to her.

I was like, should I pretend like I don't, I didn't see this just now?

You looked up.

Yeah, I locked.

I froze.

So you should give context as to why this pinball machine exists well

well

well well well gav do you want to go when we were in vegas uh we went to the pinball museum and you know i i'm into pinball but uh no one else really is uh so we were walking around and then jeff all of a sudden said oh shit this is like one of the first ones i played when i was younger and it was this pinball game I've never heard of called Earthshaker.

And

I thought it'd be really funny with Jeff's birthday coming up if I got him the pinball machine just without saying anything at all.

And I was looking online and it is not a popular game.

So it's incredibly cheap for such a giant object.

And I love it when gifts are both wholesome and burdensome.

So it's massive.

Now you're stuck with this massive thing.

And I feel like it was the perfect gift on the 20th year that I've known Jeff Ramsey.

It was the most heartfelt gift to tell, to, to, I can't even tell you what it felt like to walk in and see it.

This is a pinball machine.

It's the only pinball machine that I remember from my youth.

It was at the bowling alley where I would go when I was, you know, back in my bowling league days.

And so anytime I had extra money, I would play it.

It's basically like a dude in a convertible and a chick driving on the interstate in California.

And then there's an earthquake and California and Nevada split apart and and everything goes fucking nuts.

It's an awesome, awesome, criminally underrated.

I can't believe it's not in higher demand pinball machine.

And I genuinely loved it.

And so when I walked in,

there's fucking nowhere to put it in my house.

So obviously.

And so Meg, Gavin was, I think, out of town.

And Gavin, I think, was out of town.

So Meg had to deal with this by herself.

So they had it delivered to the office, but the people would only bring it into the building.

And so it's you open up the front door, the front door almost hits it.

It's like immediately in front of you.

There was a delay with the freight shipping.

It was going to arrive exactly a week earlier.

And then I figured I would come up with some fake reason for us to go to the office for no reason.

But it ended up arriving when both Jeff and I were in different states.

So unfortunately, Meg had to meet these dudes.

who wanted nothing to do with putting it in the house.

They were like, oh, it's

there's no note here that it's going to go up some stairs because there's like, there's some stairs up to the door, and um,

she was like, Oh,

what are we doing?

They were like, Oh, we could just leave it on the road by the side of the road,

or it's uh $300

per step,

which would have made uh the lifting of the pinball machine into the room more expensive than both the pinball and the freight shipping combined.

Oh my god,

uh, but eventually she was able to prove that I'd already mentioned there were stairs and I was

we were able to get it in.

But

I felt extremely bad that I wasn't there to

help in any way.

And then it was just in front of the front door.

It has made it

three feet from the front door.

It is three feet from the front fucking.

You walk in and there's a pinball machine.

It's the new coffee table.

It's where the coffee table used to be.

It seems like It seemed like the funniest place to leave it there.

It is.

It definitely is.

It's getting used to.

Gavin came over and fixed it well.

That's in brilliant soldering because one of the wires was broken.

And this was a funny thing where the pinball machine worked flawlessly.

But anytime you had, you got a multi-ball, which is kind of the point, you had to go in under it.

And Eric figured out how to manually trigger it because that...

that

wire had broken off.

So you're just like shoving the plunger.

So you would just shove the plunger to pop it out, but you could also very easily electrocute yourself in there because everything in there.

No, you could close the circuit.

Yeah, you could close the circuit pretty easy.

I electrocuted the shit out of myself like four times playing that game.

Gavin came and fixed it.

No more electrocution.

There's a feature on modern pinball games where when you turn the key and open the door, it turns off all the high voltage in the machine.

And this pinball is from the late 80s.

Yeah.

It does not have that feature.

Did not have that.

That's wild.

It's a really fun machine.

Like, this is like, that's like classic pinball.

Like, it's so good.

I really, really love it.

We have to move it.

It cannot keep being here.

It can't.

We either need to move it against the wall or to another part of the house because it cannot be here anymore.

It can't.

Completely agree, Eric.

And once we have enough hefty boys in the building, we can move it.

It was just been you and me lately.

So,

dude, speak about

you and me lately.

That was yesterday.

And we got, that's the, we busted our asses yesterday.

That sucked.

I say without exaggeration, yesterday was the hardest I've worked in the last year.

Oh, my God.

Easily.

Easily.

Easily.

We went and went into U-Haul, then we drove to Eric's house.

At Eric's house, we picked up the item that we received from the celebrity

auction.

When can we talk about this thing?

When can we?

When can we?

Why are we not letting us talk about something that we bought?

Ask Andrew.

Well, no, we can talk about it.

I have no issue to talk about it.

I didn't know if we wanted to do like a bigger reveal for it.

I don't know if we had a video idea, but things have been crazy.

People have been gone for weeks.

It has not been easy to schedule things, but I have no issue with talking about it.

It just hasn't been ideal to like make something with it yet.

It would be cool to do it as a reveal, but I don't have any ideas for reveals.

Anybody else?

Idra had an idea.

Yeah, I had an idea.

It made more sense at our anniversary when there was a time in which we thought maybe it would get there.

Oh, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, no, I have an idea.

Okay.

So we'll just keep it vague for now, though.

We'll keep it vague.

I was a fan of this podcast.

I will be so fucking mad at us.

We got this item.

We got this item from a movie, kind of like we got the snake eyes costume and the tuxedo, Jackie Jan tuxedo.

It's kind of the evolution, the next, the next thing in our, in our, I guess, our, our grand museum of oddities.

And it's awesome, but it's big and bulky and heavy.

And so Eric and I rented a 15-foot U-Haul, super mover, as they say.

Thought it was overkill.

Absolutely was not overkill because we 100% filled that thing up.

Anyway, we go to his house and we pick up the item.

And I say pick up, I mean, we bust our asses to getting that thing into the U-Haul because it's fucking heavy.

We took the item apart.

Well, eventually we had to take it apart, but we got it into the U-Haul fully formed.

And then like some old shit that Eric had that he wanted to throw away too,

just because we were in his garage.

And then we came back to the office and we wanted to put it in

into the room that's full of cardboard.

We have a room in the building that is full of cardboard.

Imagine every piece of cardboard a company goes through when they build out a location and they buy every single item from scratch.

We had so much cardboard thrown and stacked into the room that it reached the ceiling, right?

And that happens to be the only room that we can put this item in.

So Eric and I pulled all of the cardboard out, put it like in the driveway.

Then we

wrenched this thing out of the U-Haul and try to slam it in through the door.

And no matter how we bend and push it and twist it, we cannot get it through the door.

There's no way to get it through the door.

So we had to disassemble it,

which was scary because we were afraid we were breaking something from a film, you know?

Sure.

Wasn't weren't jazzed about doing that.

And also, Eric and I aren't the handiest dudes on earth either.

And, but we got the thing taken apart.

Eventually, got it into the building, rebuilt it, got it set up, and it's working.

So, so what, just real quick, we're not the handiest guys in the world.

It's true.

You need to see

what it is, how this thing is built, and what it is exactly to realize that it doesn't fucking matter that we're not the handiest guys in the world because it is held together with screws and wishes.

Yeah, like, I mean,

it's definitely, it was definitely built to be used once and thrown away for sure.

But unfortunately, for it, we're the trash can.

So anyway, at this point, I'll be honest, I'm about done.

Like, I'm fucking exhausted.

Just getting that thing in the building felt like a full day of work.

And we just had

Mount Kilimanjaro of cardboard in the driveway.

And so then we took all of the cardboard and styrofoam.

and every piece of discarded whatever from building out the office and we threw it in the back of this 15-foot

U-Haul.

It reached the ceiling in the U-Haul.

Eric took a photo.

He can upload that maybe into the Discord chat so you can see it.

And I will say, this is after we had started unloading.

We didn't think to take a photo when it was fully full.

So it's...

It's maybe 10 minutes into the unload at this point of like maybe it took about 40 minutes to unload it.

Anyway,

we fill the thing up and

it goes 15 feet back dude so much cardboard

so bad this and this is after we've we've cleared out a good portion of it we drive across town to this recycling place that i found online that i was able to make an appointment at and then we just very slowly took out every piece of cardboard and gave it to some dude who just looked at us like he

hated us and then he stuck it in a machine i tried to joke around with him

small.

I tried so hard to make small time with the guy.

He never acknowledged me.

He just looked me dead in the eyes and just absorbed anything I said to him.

Like he, like, it bounced off of him.

And

it was humbling.

But anyway, and we were there for probably 45 minutes just separating the different kinds of recycling and giving it to the people so that they could destroy it or move it.

By the time, and then we get to go back and return to the U-Haul.

And I think that took us about five hours of just in 100 degrees, just straight fucking lifting and shoving.

And you'd be amazed how heavy cardboard gets after a couple hours.

I'm going to guess that at no point did you close the shutter of the U-Haul with someone inside and then just like do donuts.

No, but we almost left without closing it at all.

Yeah.

Yeah.

It would have been, I mean, I think we definitely could have done that, Gavin.

I mean, the U-Haul had a third seat and we were texting someone to see if they wanted to come and help and play, but

they didn't want to.

So it was just me and Jeff all day.

By the time I was free,

I texted to the group.

Well, just you two as a group.

Hey, I'm free.

Are you guys done?

And you just went, yep.

We were pretty good.

Because

the amount of manual labor that we did was like, it was so fucked.

Just putting cardboard in that thing and then it all kept falling towards like further to like the back so one of us would have to get in and move it climb to the top of cardboard while we get to the front and then we get there and unloading it and sorting it and doing it and then

here's the problem with me and jeff is that the initial idea was okay we're gonna we're gonna take all this cardboard we're just gonna go to a bunch of dumpsters we're just gonna put in a bunch of dumpsters and no one will know and it'll be fine and we'll just find a bunch of dumpsters and then jeff was like oh i found a record i found like a recycling center that will just simply take all the cardboard.

We were so proud of ourselves for doing it the right way that we kept talking about it.

We talked about it for 10 minutes afterwards about how nice it was to do it the right way.

I've never congratulated myself and someone else so much in my life.

We were so proud of ourselves for doing it the right way and saving ourselves so many hours of dumpster tossing and hiding behind buildings.

You know what I mean?

Because

that was totally where it was headed.

but then once we saw how much cardboard it was we were like there's just no way it's just no way

this can't be a stealth mission that it's impossible yeah imagine if you found halo wars your dumpster die

I assumed it wasn't fun because of the heat but I love days like that like the day we just got a U-Haul and like we're doing the porter potty and like moving stuff all around out of the office Oh, you would have loved yesterday, dude.

We had so much fun.

It sucks so bad.

But

we also spent a lot of time congratulating ourselves on all the heavy lifting that we did and all the like thankless grunt work we were doing eric and i were pretty high on eric and i yesterday oh that was absolutely no one was bigger fans of us than us yesterday man it was great uh but we got that room we got that room cleared out looks good in the house man you've both had like manual labor jobs though right in the past yeah yeah of course yeah

a long time ago oh i see just like yeah i'm i'm like i'm like almost 40.

i haven't had a job like like that since I was like in my 20s.

I know I may project a timeless youth, but I am a half a century old.

I am older than all of your parents at this point listening to this podcast.

So the pinball movers were $300 per step.

What would your guys' fee be for per step?

Oh, man.

Incalculable.

Yeah, we went up and down a lot of steps.

I imagine

there were a lot of steps.

They just add up and then climbing in and out of that U-Haul, that adds up.

And having to to climb in and out of the U-Haul again to get all the stuff out.

Oh, man.

Imagine a room so full of cardboard that just the act of removing the cardboard from that room takes 30 full minutes.

I've never seen so much cardboard in my life.

And we didn't buy that much shit, did we?

I guess we did.

We did.

We did.

The problem was like a lot of it was broken down too.

Thanks to Emily.

She did a great job.

It was broken down.

It was great.

A lot of it wasn't.

It took us half an hour to move half of it out of the room so we could get the huge auction item in, which took another half hour to disassemble and reassemble.

And then we had to put all of the cardboard that was in the driveway in the truck and then had to get the other half of the cardboard out of the house.

It was like, dude, it felt endless.

And when you walked in, when you, every time you walked in from outside, you would just go, We got to be getting close.

You're not.

It's Sisophysian.

It was so bad.

It sucked.

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Anyway, the office is fucking fucking humming along, though.

We got our trash can built.

I got curtains hung in the break room.

We ran the video and everything, all the tech for the break room.

We're just waiting on doing the sound with Nick now that he's back.

We'll be ready to go on that show in probably two weeks from this recording.

I don't know that we'll release it in two weeks, but we're just, we're like, I would say this Death Star is like 94% operational.

We're the Death Star?

Yeah, why not?

Death That's because I'd like to be the good guys.

We point our laser beam of comedy at the universe.

Take home of Alderon, aka the listeners.

Alderon was just a metaphor for misery.

And by shooting it with our comedy Death Star array, we're blowing up their sadness.

So where's our weakness hole in the office?

That's what I was about to say.

Imagine if there was a weakness hole in the pinball machine.

Like a really hard spot, but if the ball went into a certain area, the whole office just collapses.

I think it's where it kept electrocuting me when I was trying to.

For a guy that hates pinball, Eric, you've played quite a lot of this one.

I love free play.

I love free play pinball.

If I had to pay for the pinball that I played today before we started this, oh, baby.

Oh, baby.

I would have been furious and slamming the machine to get my money back.

Yeah, that's right.

There are plenty of things I enjoy when I don't have to pay for them.

Live music.

Live music is fun.

I'm zero interest in paying for a ticket to a concert, but when I hear live music, I'm always like, huh?

I feel like if I hear live music I didn't pay for, it annoys me.

No, I love some live music I didn't pay for.

It's free.

This is free music.

In this economy, I'll take any savings I can get.

But it's not going to be someone you're interested in, surely.

That's not true.

I've encountered many of

unexpected live performances that I've enjoyed.

In the naimo yeah

no in austin where are you uh what do you

well i just didn't do people come over to do performances in that town well you can do you know their public spaces that you can music-free environment you can go yeah

we're working on it's illegal it's like foot loose there's no dancing no music yeah we had the foot loose rules up until like 2018 so it's become real musical since then people would go crazy because to be honest when i was snooping around the naimo to try and pick a building that you had to identify on Google Maps, I didn't really see a lot of

good venues.

Well, when I say venue, well, we do have one great venue downtown.

There are a few like decent venues, but I'm talking about on the streets, people playing music.

Okay, that's fair.

Public spaces.

Busker style.

Some busker style, but also there's like a jazz festival and like a rotten, like music festivals that occur throughout the summer where people will just play in sort of

hubs that people visit, like the downtown core or just various places where you can just hear people playing music if you're in the area.

It's always nice.

I enjoy some unexpected live music.

What else do you like this better when it's free?

What's better when it's free?

I mean, most things are better when it's free, but like that I dislike when I'm paying for it.

Hmm.

I think most food.

gets elevated.

There's food I don't like that if given to me for free, I think think would become, it elevates, not to a point in which I'd like it, but it would be edible.

What's what's something you're insane?

No, here's the thing.

What's something I would be so fucking mad if I've a list of stuff I still don't like if it's free?

I'm right there with Andrew.

I just did a thing on Saul Right about like discontinued sodas, and I told a story about how there was this soda called Josta in the 90s that they were giving away when I was living in South Carolina.

And we, my friends and I got like 40 of them because they were free, and we drank it all summer.

It was the grossest thing ever, and I would never have paid 30 cents for it.

But for free, I drank it all day long.

Yeah, for me, it's cauliflower.

If someone forced me to pay for cauliflower, I'd be fucking furious.

I'd be so upset.

But if I'm at like a dinner and someone's like, oh, I made this cauliflower dish, I can eat.

I'll be like, yeah, this is edible.

So, if you had the choice between a five-dollar meal of something you enjoy and a free cauliflower, you would go for that oh

what hmm see it becomes a it becomes the dilemma of value because like what's the meal oh what's the five dollar meal yeah what do you like what what's it's a chicken it's a chicken meal it's a chicken oh that sounds pretty good five dollars for a chicken meal in this economy it's a chicken sandwich oh i'm taking the chicken sandwich I've never heard Andrew say in this economy before.

And he said it like four times.

We're living in this economy, economy eric

the chicken prices are crazy when was the last time you paid five bucks for a chicken sandwich oh my god that's like a nine dollar sandwich in any fast food restaurant you go to today you can't even get half a foot long for five dollars you find five dollars anything i'm buying it yeah oh speaking of footlong

uh me and jeff and gavin had uh

we had a lot of we had a lot of fun on on what was it was it monday tuesday maybe It was.

Yeah, we did it.

Yeah,

we had a pretty good time with a couple of sandwiches.

So Eric or I, I can't remember who found it initially, over the weekend, saw a TikTok of some dude who

had a subway sandwich and fell on it.

Like he tripped and fell.

And he was just, you don't see him fall.

You just see the aftermath.

He opens it up and it's a perfectly flat sandwich, like a, like a cartoon steamroller drove over it.

It's impossibly flat for a sub-sandwich.

Like under a centimeter.

And so, yeah, under a centimeter.

There you go.

So when we were hanging out Sunday, having a boat day, we got to talking about it and we decided to have a contest to see who could flatten a sandwich the most.

And so we got together on Tuesday and we all, we went and we all got the same.

I almost said we all rented the same sandwich.

We all went and we bought the same sandwich.

In this economy, this is what we got to do.

We should have returned those subway sandwiches.

I guess I had U-Haul in the brain still.

Well, they were very close to each other, the U-Haul and the subway.

They're on the same street.

And

we bought three identical sub-sandwiches, and then we filmed the video to see who could flatten it the most.

And there was a clear winner, but obviously we can't spoil it.

Yeah, we'll have that video.

I think the video might be out by now.

Yeah, can we just stick it up?

Yeah.

Yeah, yeah, we'll put it out tomorrow if someone decides to edit it.

Yeah, I'll do it.

I have an idea for it.

Decides to edit.

I don't know.

It's supposed to go out tomorrow.

It's supposed to.

Is that what you agreed on already?

Yes.

I mean, like 32 seconds ago from you.

This is from you.

I put it on the calendar for you.

No, dipshit.

You uh

we had this conversation in the office.

Yeah, but you said you would like look at the calendar and like we'll, you'll see when we can stick it out.

You said that it was, I was still waiting.

We all stood around my computer.

We all stood around my computer and I put it on the calendar and I said, Can you edit it by this day and time?

That's not true.

Maybe I was playing pinball.

I don't remember that at all.

And then you said, you said, maybe we can show it on the stream.

Yeah.

Oh, these are all maybe.

These are all maybes.

So are we settling on just putting it up or is it going on the stream?

This is, this is so nuts.

I don't care if we put it up or not.

This is so crazy.

This is like the most we like thing in the world.

I did all of the lifting on my end.

I don't know what else I'm supposed to do.

Well, just finalize it.

Jeff, do you agree that we're on the calendar?

I hate, I hate to step in, but I was there.

I'm independent.

I can dispassionately evaluate

the situation.

And I hate to say this, Gavin, but Eric's being very accurate with the way it went down.

We all schedule it on the calendar together.

You were probably playing pinball, but it was put on the calendar and decided.

There was a discussion over which Friday and what video to bump.

It was a whole thing.

And then in addition to that, you said maybe we could also show it on the stream and he went and eric was like yeah that's great we could do that too but i was i'm pretty sure like i definitely left the office thinking it was scheduled all right well you know that that pimple machine's a real menace and uh

shouldn't be in front of the front door i know that's i'm sorry

i take it back i'm sorry eric's wrong

maybe you got electrocuted and you forgot maybe it shocked you and it like a brainwave thing

who knows screw eric he doesn't know what he's talking about my question because I didn't want to overload you because you have other stuff all the time.

I never want to overload you with like an edit or whatever.

And I went, are you sure you can do that?

Like by Friday, that's going to be okay.

And you assured me, yeah, no, no problem.

Well, here's the thing.

Because there's no audio to sync.

It's all just on your phone.

When I finished up yesterday with my work and the two people, the two people I was going to help were already finished with their work.

Turns out I had a little bit of extra time to get that video done.

So it's ready.

Ah, that's great.

So you did it on time.

Yeah.

So what's the issue?

So you did it on time, but you didn't realize you were doing it on time.

And so now you're being persnickety about whether it's on time or not?

I knew we were going to try and put it out, like just drop it on top of a, like either bump something or just put it out in addition, but I just didn't know whether it was going to be like Friday or Saturday or whatever.

Just got it done anyway.

That video might not be done.

I'm just throwing that out there.

I have a thing to talk about later.

Yeah.

What does that mean?

Oh, is there an I can add to it?

I think there's going to be an edition potentially.

Ooh.

Oh, wow.

So this isn't going to come out tomorrow, but when you're listening to this podcast, maybe it'll come out that Friday.

I don't know.

I have no idea.

Do you want your attempt in the video?

That's not what I was thinking.

I was thinking maybe we could, as a way to reveal the item that we've been talking about, use it to attempt to flatten the sandwich.

Oh, probably.

Okay, so your attempt, you don't.

Okay.

Gavin asked if you want your attempt in the video, and you said no.

Well, if you want to credit it as my attempt, sure.

I just, that's, does, that doesn't matter.

I don't care if I have an attempt in it or not, but just I think I would like to see the science behind it attempting to flatten.

Okay.

Well, because originally you wanted an attempt with your robot, and then I did.

So you could do that, or you could do an attempt with your real body, or...

We could use this item.

There's a lot of choices.

Okay.

I think we should use the item.

I want to see what what that looks like.

I'm very fascinated.

And then people will know in the video that will be the debut of the item.

If I was a fan of this podcast, I'd be so mad at us.

Like, this is like the second time in this episode where I'm just like, it's so confusing.

You're always mad at us.

You don't need to be a fan of the podcast.

No, no, no.

As a fan, if I was listening to this podcast, I'd just be like, what the fuck are these guys talking about?

Put the video out or don't.

What do you think the chances are the video is already out by the time this podcast comes out?

I don't think so.

I think it'll come out the following Friday.

I think this video will be out on the 8th.

Terrible.

It's apparently on the calendar for this week though.

Yeah.

What is the apparently?

Yes, Andrew's asking us to hold it now.

Andrew's asking us to don't put it out.

He wants to do something as a part of it.

What I, we can put it out tomorrow.

I have no issue with that.

Andrew is asking to do something else with it.

You seem confused about this whole thing, and I don't know what any of the confusion is.

Earthshaker.

Okay.

i'm gonna electrocute you with the pinball machine and then i'm gonna use and then i'm gonna use the auction item on you

i had an unexpectedly uh hilarious thing happen to me in the midst of a not hilarious thing my poor mom broke her ankle she fell down here stairs it was a whole thing very traumatic very scary I had to call the paramedics.

People had to come.

It was a whole thing.

I had never seen my mom get injured in that way before.

So it was very shocking and upsetting.

I was having a full meltdown.

I'm crying.

I'm in shock.

And then I look at my phone.

I get an alert.

And

I get put in a group chat called Happy by someone that has never put me in any group chat that I've ever been in before.

What?

And I thought, because I had, I just needed somewhere to like vent.

This is in the process.

she's getting taken care of.

I was messaging a friend of mine of what was happening.

And so I look and I get, I'm in a group chat now called happy.

And I'm in like this emotional wreck state.

I'm confused.

And my initial thought was, oh, maybe,

maybe they decided to like make a support group chat type thing

so that everyone can stay in the loop on what's happening.

And just like,

I don't know, a support place.

But it's weird that this person put me in it because that's not who I was talking to.

But the other person I was talking to is it's like six people in this group chat called happy that I've been added to.

So they know about the broken ankle.

People in the group chat did.

So I thought maybe they had a conversation and I was like, maybe a group is formed and like I can, this is like a place I can give updates or whatever.

But I'm just like, I'm so con this is just the timing of it is, and I'll call it happy.

And I'm trying to process crying.

And then a message comes through.

And it is not an emotional support chat, it is not.

This person has no idea of what I'm in the midst of in this moment.

They wanted to organize a Happy Gilmore 2 watch-along because it came out that day.

I am in shambles.

And then I look at this, and it's a message: like, yo, guys, you want to watch that happy Gilmore?

Adam Sandler's back, baby.

There's Satan Man.

Satan man's on Netflix.

And I, it was like the funniest thing that could happen in that moment of this person with the worst time.

Putting me in a group chat called Happy when I'm at an all-time low.

And that they want to watch Happy Gilmore 2 that day

was incredible.

I just, I replied to the chat, this is not your fault.

You have no concept, but this is the worst timing you could possibly have for any of this.

This is incredible.

It was the greatest, like, unexpected laugh.

And like, so of course, this is the timing of this is so incredibly this show and me.

I bet that moment was funnier than Happy Gilmore 2.

I haven't seen it yet.

I'd like to see it.

I saw it either.

It's okay.

It's like a, like most Adam Samuel movies, it's a little bit too long and the end goes kind of off the rails, but it's worth watching, I think.

Especially if you like clip shows, because it is 40%

clip show.

Yeah.

It's like, do you remember Julie Bowen carrying carrying two mugs of beer and lingerie?

Well, if you don't, we're going to remind you eight times in the film.

I'm excited to see it, despite I've heard mainly negative things, but that was not the day for it.

That was like essentially.

I'm trying to think if there's any.

Oh, we did one other thing before that that I'm very excited to talk about because I haven't talked about it at all.

I've been working.

in the background for a long time now to get our first guest on a piece of regulation content.

It's been in the works for quite a bit, had to wait.

And then I had to go through a process of talking to CBS about it, which is not something I was expecting to do.

But that was a whole thing.

We had to be babysat by a CBS representative during the interview.

I think it's wild how many times Andrew has been in direct contact with major corporations.

It was a whole thing.

We're independent independent now.

And so just to like not tease who it is any longer, Shaen,

the pencil judge, aka survivor contestant.

We got to talk.

We'd been messaging back and forth for a bit.

They're wonderful.

Wanted to have them on to just talk about regulation stuff and survivor.

So Jeff and I did an interview that I think went incredibly well.

I'm so excited for people to hear it.

I can't wait.

Yeah, before I could schedule it, I had to go through CBS to do it.

And we've been independent for a little bit longer than a year now, but it's the first time since we've been independent where there was a process of like, who are you?

Why, why do you deserve?

Like, there was like, you had to like

sell yourself in a sense.

And it was, it felt, uh,

it felt weird.

It was a weird thing to feel.

Like back at, you know, Rooster Teeth, you had to get things approved.

And we've been so not in that space, there was a feeling of like, what the fuck?

Like, I gotta, I gotta figure this out.

And then they asked for, it asked for links to social media accounts.

And our Instagram is still face, which is fantastic.

So then, like, how do I

keep signing?

It is, I don't know why it's still that, but it is that.

Um, but I was able to get it organized.

Jeff and I talked to him for like 20 minutes, got deep into some survivor stuff, but then also a lot of regulation stuff.

We had some rulings.

Genuinely wonderful person, but the most impressive thing to me, the thing that blew me away the most, he speaks regulation.

Oh, yeah.

Absolutely.

He came out of the gate swinging.

It was.

He really did.

So how long is that period where if you want to talk to him, you have to go through CBS?

I don't know.

I've been meaning to talk to him about that because I'd love to bring him on for something else in the future.

I'd like to meet him.

I'd like to have a beer with him him or something or, you know, do I have to go through CBS?

I don't know.

To what end?

I guess if it probably involves being published, you probably do have to go through CBS, but I don't know for how long.

I'd never consider that with like a survivor contestant.

How long is that entryway?

When does it close?

It has to close soon, right?

Like it.

Yeah.

It can't go into the next season, I would assume.

But it's just something I've never heard of.

But also, like, I've never been in a position in which I'm trying to talk to a survivor contestant.

So so now that you mentioned that, Andrew,

how does that release and where do we release it?

Have we figured that out?

I figured it would just go up on wherever audio gets released for what we do.

I think it's just in the podcast feed.

Yeah, okay, cool.

So it wasn't on video.

It wasn't like a webcam or anything?

We had one, but we don't like do video podcasts.

So we talked and there was not really a visual element outside of the fact that

when we started, he was holding holding a pencil.

But we bring up and the fact that he spent the whole interview holding a pencil.

Did he have any Gerplas front and center?

No Gerpler.

You know, I'd be shocked if he knew what a Gerpler was, to be honest.

Okay.

But in his defense, it's not like he had access to a Gerpler and decided not to have one.

True.

Front and center.

Or shirt or a regulation shirt.

You do, but it was, you know, it was tucked away.

So we got into the Australian news with him.

It's fine.

We did.

We did.

We did.

I'm very excited for people to hear.

We got some clear, definitive.

I think he should sort of be our general judge for any debate.

He's definitely qualified.

He's absolutely qualified.

So I'm so excited for that to come out.

How did he do on Survivor?

He was the fifth person.

He's final five.

Oh, that's great.

Good fan.

Was it final five, right?

Or final six?

I think he was six.

Six, yeah, final six.

It was right before the five.

Still, yeah.

Still really good.

Incredible.

If he would have made it to the final five, I think he would have won the whole show.

Completely agree.

Like, if he was in the final three definitively, and I think if he would have made it to five, his path to three that's

would have been

that's why they had to probably frame him to get him out.

Yeah, there's a whole framing situation.

You should watch the season, Gavin.

It's a really fun season.

Yeah, I'll do it.

Good season of television.

What are you laughing at, Nick?

Just the way you said that.

I will do it.

I don't believe you, but that's okay.

That's also fine.

You don't have to.

Put it on the calendar.

Put it on the calendar.

I'd rather that than charm.

That doesn't.

I mean, that doesn't seem to do anything for him on the calendar.

So, I mean, it's up to you.

I have a question.

What calendar are you talking about?

I assume the work one that we all have.

Sure.

How do I

regulation releases calendar?

Do you not have that calendar?

I mean, I see it every Monday when you open it on your computer.

But you don't have it.

He left.

Eric left.

When you open your calendar on your phone or whatever, you don't just have the release scheduled?

For like a year in the last four months, you haven't had it.

No, I've got the

recording schedule, like when to be somewhere.

But

it's the same calendar?

No, it isn't.

It's the same calendar.

Today I have regulation podcast recording.

I have Let's Play Record.

And on top of that, I have Charmed Watch Along two episodes.

And

you don't see Roadcraft 2.

You don't see Flattest Sandwich Tomorrow.

You don't see Doomsday 7?

No.

Great.

But you said they're the same calendar?

It doesn't matter.

It doesn't matter at this point.

It's fine.

Like, why do I have half a calendar?

Oh, they are different.

Oh, yeah.

This is today.

Great.

That's cool, man.

Why don't

subscribe to the other calendar then?

Yeah.

I don't remember subscribing to this one.

I just have it on my email.

You put my email address in, didn't you?

Do you remember why we built the calendar this way, Jeff?

Do you remember why we built this release calendar like this?

Do you remember who we built it for?

Who

wanted the release calendar like this so that way they could keep an eye on it?

I do.

Yeah.

I do.

I'm just, okay, I was just, okay, cool.

I was just curious.

It doesn't matter.

Again, if I was a fan of this show, I'd be pissed.

It's fine.

I I hate being in the middle.

Get someone off that other side then, man.

I don't know what to tell you.

But if you make the calendar, don't you have to add people's email addresses to it?

How did I get on this one?

Fuck

you.

I'm certainly in the wrong here, but I don't know how I have this one.

I don't know how I have this one and not the other one is what I'm saying.

It's more just how have you not noticed or commented on it until this moment.

I mean, see,

there's an invite.

There's an invite for it.

You can make changes and manage sharing within the calendar.

You can see all the events within the calendar.

Already added you on this list.

So I should delete my folder of screenshots of your screen on Mondays.

You've been taking screenshots?

you're a psycho i'm looking at you're legitimately right like i don't know like i really don't know how you operate like a business like not this one the other one because this is crazy

well the other one is just this whole time we've been doing this for a year and this whole time you've never had that calendar on your calendar No, you've never had the regulation releases calendar.

But I've got screenshots.

Kevin, I'm so floored.

Like, I'm like, I'm absolutely stunned.

I'm stunned right now.

I cannot believe this.

So, if I press calendars,

that sounds like something you should add to your things that Gavin learned list.

I have mine, and now you have yours.

Yeah, anything new on that calendar or on that list, Andrew?

You got anything new that you learned?

So, Gavin, if you look at my calendars on the left of the screen, what do you see?

If I look at your calendars, oh my god,

why even bother?

Like, why even do this?

Like,

there's a thing at the bottom of the screenshot that you sent that said calendar that says, like, calendars.

Yeah, that's what I just pressed when I said, so if I press calendars, yeah, uh-huh.

Yeah.

And you don't see anyone, anything that says regulation releases or anything like that.

No, but I am subscribed to a cal.

Oh, you're on a desktop.

Regulation release.

Well, neither we're recording.

Yeah.

Yeah, what are you recording on?

He's just playing on his phone, too.

It's mine.

No, I don't have my calendar on this PC.

Let's see.

No, I've got...

I'm on the work calendar of someone who is dead.

What the fuck?

We got any content coming out?

Got my Slow-Mo calendar.

Holidays in the United Kingdom.

This is, I'm like, I just don't.

So how do I get regulation releases to show up in my, because I don't have the option for it here.

So how do I get it to like be an should be under my count?

You have to, you probably have to go in your email and accept the invite.

Shit.

That's crazy.

I'll do that, Leah.

No, you won't.

No, you won't.

No, I don't.

Let's send them a new invite right now.

Hold on.

I feel like if I was the listener of this episode, I'd be so annoyed at just me specifically.

Yeah, 100%.

I agree with you.

Yeah, dude.

100%.

i apologize i apologize i just said it to you again but i've never missed an editing deadline i've always got my screenshots

cool

he's always got his i would credit less the screenshots and more us going hey is that gonna come out is that okay do you need that moved i'm impressed that you cared enough to take screenshots honestly Yeah, I felt kind of bad about it because it always has like Eric Dentist in the middle of the freaking week as well.

That's true.

It's my whole whole calendar.

Yeah.

But at least I know when not to bother you at the dentist.

Oh my God.

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Anyway, I reshared it with you.

Andrew learned about Spy Kids 28 and reject the cookies.

Yeah,

those are my most recent discoveries.

What?

What is Spy Kids 28?

I learned that Carla Gugino is 28 years old as the mom in the first Spy Kids, and that blew my mind.

Because as a kid who watched Spy Kids, she felt like old mom.

And the fact that I am now two years older than she was and spy kids and she had spy kids, crazy.

I think I've been in love with Carla Gugino since like the early 90s.

Yep.

It's very fair.

Since like probably son-in-law.

Whoa.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Since Paulie Shore, like son-in-law.

Silkspec to one.

Ugh.

Yeah.

They're like a weird Hollywood actor celebrity type thing for me where I can't imagine them doing normal things.

Mm-hmm.

I can't imagine them.

Flattening a sandwich, a Subway sandwich.

Can't see it.

You know, normal thing.

Do you think that's a normal thing?

Well, just even even having a, I don't know, like seeing them in line at Subway would feel weird to me.

I can't imagine them

seeing, honestly, seeing any people in line at Subway.

Yeah, you probably,

it's not a line situation.

I hope it would be weird to see me at Subway.

You know,

you fit.

Looks in Standout as weird in my brain.

That passes the test of weird, not weird.

Do you know what's so crazy at 28 for me?

What?

Is that Heath Fledger was the Joker at 28.

What?

Wow, that's crazy.

Isn't that nuts?

He feels at least 32.

28.

So he died.

How old was he when he died?

Is that who you have on your calendar?

Do you have Heath Ledger's calendar on your

stops at the Imaginarium of Dr.

Vernassus back in

28?

20.

It's crazy.

Oh, so he's probably 27 then when he filmed it, maybe.

That's insane.

Yeah.

By the way, did he die like right after they filmed?

He died in January of 2008.

So

it's probably not right after they filmed, but it was probably pretty close.

Hey, do we have any updates on any park benches that we may be dedicating in any of the states yet?

Dude, no, we got a lead on one at the San Diego Zoo that would be like a lot of fun.

Do we have like $50,000?

Oh, it's so

insane.

So that was our first avenue.

And then

we will be looking at other park benches.

If you know of a park bench that you think that we should go for, a park of some kind, let us know because that points us in like the right direction.

But the San Diego Zoo want to, you know, shout out the regulation listener who's like, hey, dude, I do some stuff with like Safari Park.

He's like, it will be cost prohibitive, but like, I'll put you in contact.

Well,

cost prohibitive was a light way to put it, dude.

It's crazy.

I want to get into the second thing I learned before we move too far away, which is reject the cookies.

I've been accepting cookies on every website I go onto because I thought I had to.

Didn't know you didn't have to.

There's two options, though.

It's like reject or accept.

I, at some point in my life, felt like I had heard that if you reject the cookies, you can't go onto the site.

And I always want to see the information on the site.

So I would always accept the cookies.

I just learned you don't need to accept the cookies.

Yeah, I mean, I feel like it's like sometimes there's like a a feature of the site that won't work.

And I had it, in my understanding of it, I couldn't view the thing I wanted to look at, the news story or the product or whatever, unless I accepted the cookies.

So I've been accepting cookies left and right.

Every site, you give me some cookies, I'm accepting the cookies.

I can reject the cookies.

I mean, you probably got a warning message one time that said, if you reject the cookies, you won't be able to see the items in this frame or whatever.

And so you, that's how you got it into your head.

It is possible that some features on websites don't work without cookies.

I think there was a news story.

I think there was a policy change like over a decade ago that made cookies more prevalent.

And it was one of those like headline things where I read it and didn't read the story or maybe heard someone talk about it, but like did no research into it.

And that was my takeaway.

So I've been living in an accept all cookies lifestyle ever since that moment for like 10 plus years.

I'd assume.

So I've just been accepting cookies everywhere.

Didn't know it was a thing that people didn't do.

So I'm rejecting cookies now.

Saying no to the cookies.

Have you noticed?

Have you noticed a change in your life?

Not a single goddamn thing has changed, but I'm rejecting those cookies now.

I've had too many of them.

I guess it's like you're allowing them to like track.

I don't know.

It's bad.

Yeah, it like saves the thing and then it can like tell where you've been from that site and it'll like report back to the original site.

Some tracking stuff.

I don't want reporting.

They don't need that data.

They don't need to report to where I put

that swear.

I just don't bother accepting.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Well, so I'm living that lifestyle now.

I'm rejecting the cookies.

What's your favorite cookie?

I love a peanut butter cookie.

Oh, interesting.

Some chunks, maybe some Reese's chunks in it.

Like a soft or a hard peanut butter cookie?

Soft.

Yeah.

I'm more of a soft cookie guy.

That's the way we are.

Why'd you say it like that?

I'm right there with you.

What, you like your cookies hard, Gavin?

No, I just seem a little bit orgasmic about it.

Oh.

You ever had a good soft cookie?

He likes peanut butter.

I like chocolate chip.

Holy shit, man.

You gave me a good soft chocolate chip cookie, all gooey and warm and hot.

It is kind of sexual.

I don't, see, the soft chocolate chip doesn't do it for me, but you did say warm, and that is pretty good.

If it's fresh, like if it's, you know, like it hasn't solidified yet, warm,

real good.

But, like, you can get a pretty shitty

soft chocolate chip cookie, I have found.

Oh, for sure.

There are bad soft chocolate chip cookies for sure.

I don't know if I've had a bad soft peanut butter cookie.

I don't think I have.

Gavin strikes me, even though he said he isn't, I feel like UK is like, yeah, we only do our cookies hard.

We only got hard cookies.

You can hammer nails with the cookies in England, yeah.

We don't cook our bacon all the way through and we have hard cookies overcook the overcook the cookie undercook the bacon it's the british way i saw 28 years later the other day and there's a scene in it in the beginning where a kid pockets some bacon and then gives it to somebody and the reveal of the bacon i was like that's not cooked enough that's some bacon i would not want that bacon uk style don't like that bacon don't like your soft bacon gavin chew on this for a while asshole i don't know why you prefer burnt bacon.

It's crunchy and crispy, and it makes it salty.

Oh, it's so much better than soft.

You know, it's almost a good crispy bacon, it's almost sexual.

Do you want a crispy steak?

Uh,

like,

why is that suddenly the meat that's crispy?

Do you think bacon and steak are like comparable meats?

I think they're very different in texture and experience.

It's like gammon.

What?

Yeah.

A casino?

No, that's back gammon.

It's this front gammon I'm talking about.

There's a lack of thickness to bacon that I think doesn't translate well.

And also, you want a sear.

So like your point, I don't understand your point with a steak.

Like you want the inside to be softer.

Juicy, but the softer, but the outside to have a little crisp to it.

I wouldn't want to put it on a fork and have it stick out horizontally without bending.

I mean, what's the best part of a brisket?

The burnt ends.

That's pretty good.

Like a good brisket.

The end of this episode has just been you guys saying foods and going, oh, I'm

back on meat pretty hard right now.

Yeah, dude.

Hell are you?

You have another hot dog?

Nick knows.

Nick knows.

No, I'm still off hot dogs, but I'm on.

I'm on.

I got this.

My father-in-law has one of those ninja electric wood fire grills.

This is not a sponsored

podcast, by the way.

This is just, he had one, and I was bitching about how I love to grill, but I hate propane.

I hate dealing with switching out the canisters all the time.

And I hate charcoal now because you have to set up a grill in like 45 minutes to an hour in advance of when you want to cook.

And if all you wanted to cook was like one steak for Emily and I to share and a couple of Brussels sprouts, it's way too much work.

It's way too time-prohibitive.

So I just don't grill anymore.

But he had one of those things, and

he used it and it made good-ass steaks.

So I bought one, and I've made steak every night now that I've had it.

That's delicious.

I love that for you.

You turn it on, it takes like seven minutes to heat up.

Then you it has a thermometer that comes out of the machine that you just put right in the steak so that it just like beeps when it's done.

It turns itself off when it's done.

You don't have to do shit.

You have to flip a steak once, but that's like it.

I wonder if we made a list of soft foods and hard foods which one would dominate what side would we end up going on what like foods that can be hard and soft or just one and no just like one or the other it's either hard

hard or a soft food i think i'd probably go soft yeah because i'm thinking like mashed potatoes and soups all the soups in the world you have access to oh i'll trade the soups for nothing I'll give hard food soups for future considerations.

I don't need soup in my life.

Get that out of here.

A good soup or a good stew in the winter is nice.

Do you wish that a hot popsicle could be a thing?

No.

No.

Like, imagine if you could suck on a soup with a stick, but it wouldn't be cold.

I think that'd be delicious.

Hotsicle.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Well, okay.

Well, on the back of the hotsicle and maybe walking back a step or two, it is after the first of the month in August.

And with that comes the end of our dog count, a year-long adventure that we've been in the middle of.

How are you guys feeling?

I'll go over the numbers here shortly, but how are you guys feeling about the dog count where we kept count, if you're not familiar, kept count of every hot dog that we ate for a full calendar year?

I'm feeling pretty good about my count.

I thought it was a fascinating experiment, and I'm really proud of us for maintaining it for the entirety of one year.

It doesn't feel too doesn't feel like we started this a year ago, you know?

It's cool that we were able to keep up with it.

Yeah, and we did.

There was a Slack channel.

It definitely skewed the results on my end.

I probably had twice as many dogs as I usually would in a year.

I would even go as far as maybe 3x for you.

Yeah, no kidding.

You don't know me.

Oh, shit.

I think he got me there.

I would.

He does.

Well,

can I run down the dog count numbers?

Is that okay?

Please read the numbers and then.

Dog count from lowest to highest.

Again, not a contest.

In fifth place, Gavin Free,

nine hot dogs.

Not bad.

Not bad.

In fourth place,

Eric Badour, 24 hot dogs.

The bronze medalist,

not a contest.

Andrew Panton, 27 hot dogs.

The silver medalist.

Nick Schwartz, 37 hot dogs.

It's a lot of dogs.

It's a lot of hot dogs.

Finally, in our year-long hot dog eating count,

first place, the gold medalists, the way that we all knew it would be.

Jeff Ramsey, with a final count,

62 hot dogs.

That's crazy.

Yeah.

I guess at the end of the day, I just have that dog in me.

What do you mean?

Well, you definitely have that dog in you.

You've had so much of that dog in you, you no longer want any more dog to be part of you.

I'm done dogging.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Much like I've written off corn dogs for the rest of my life, I am, I'm seriously considering taking 2020, that back half of 2025 and the first half of 2026 off of hot dogs.

It's like seven years worth of dogs for me.

I didn't even hit the national average for one year, which is

something in the 70s.

70s.

There's no fucking way that that is happening.

It makes no sense.

0%.

We thought the number was bullshit when I first read it.

And now I can confirm there's no fucking way those numbers on the National Hot Dog Sausage Council's website are correct.

It can't be.

I went out of my way to eat hot dogs at every opportunity.

And I still fell like 10 short of the national average.

I don't buy it.

I will say I will probably eat a nunya dog in there every once in a while because that is a different beast altogether.

Yes.

But yeah, I'm fucking burned out on hot dogs.

I never thought I'd see the day.

This whole thing started because I asked you guys a question, what's a food you never say no to when it's offered to you?

And for me, it was a hot dog.

I now feel comfortable saying no to hot dogs.

That's wild.

Do we know of any other national averages that we should take into

the next year?

Oh, that's interesting.

Hey, leave a comment.

If you guys know some other,

leave your sources as well, some national averages for some other foods that we might want to attempt this with.

I think that's a really good idea, Gavin.

I didn't even consider doing it with something else.

I feel like it makes sense to have a passive experiment working every year.

I think I completely agree.

I like that.

I really like making a Slack channel

for this.

Hey, Gav, how did your Paella account end?

I ended the year on

what was it?

Four.

On four.

Yeah.

So it was on four.

And then the final picture was a picture of Paella, and you just said couldn't face it.

Well, I did three in one trip to Spain.

And I thought, I'll get one last one in on the on the air in the airport on the way back and uh

couldn't bring myself to do it

as is uh customary i was hanging out with your wife and not you the other day we were playing bingo and uh she was telling me she was like so you're gonna win the hot dog count and i'm like it's not a competition but yes i'm absolutely gonna win And she was like, you know what you should do?

And she was really pushing me on this.

And I'm not going to do it because I don't like seafood, but she was really pushing me for it.

She's like, you need to go and find five paellas in Austin and eat them this week before the 31st.

And then you can beat them in the hot dog count and the paella count.

That's my point.

My wife suggesting that.

My wife.

Yeah.

Forcefully suggesting that.

Wow.

You didn't want to do it?

No, I've never had paella, and it seemed like a weird way to start.

Yeah.

I spared five of these.

I'm going to take five paella, please.

But I love how devious she is.

She really wants to get you.

She's great.

That's why I like her.

I have a calendar update, and it's brought back a lot of memories.

Oh, no.

Just post this.

Oh, wrong computer.

Press enter on

the keyboard.

All right.

I remember this now.

This is what happens when I click that calendar.

What am I looking at?

So it's unchecked.

Yes, the little video is unchecked on the side.

And then I go and check that to put all the entries in.

It just disappears.

The calendar deletes itself from our calendars.

Yeah, I remember doing this.

I remember trying like four times to put this one on.

I do remember this now.

You could have, you could have saved yourself a lot of getting yelled at if you just would have shown us this 20 minutes ago.

Yeah, I forgot.

You are completely absolved of any guilt other than maybe, maybe we could have discussed this and worked something out.

Yeah, because

the screenshot thing, as I was describing what I do, I was thinking of like how much of an Andrew approach that is to a technical problem.

Like, I'm jumping through all kinds of different hoops than just jumping through the one correct hoop.

Uh, and yeah, that's why it just doesn't work.

Doesn't work for me.

How weird.

What do we do?

Where, how do we go forward?

I don't know.

Maybe I could try on a different email address.

Maybe you need to have another.

Yeah.

Well, either way, we're going to figure it out on the next episode.

Thank you guys so much for listening.

Go to patreon.com slash the regulation regulation pod.

Hopefully, you got a Gerpler.

We had our Gerpler release.

I imagine an immediate success.

Also, some patches, I think, as well.

Yeah.

Yep.

So, thank you guys for coming through.

Appreciate you listening to the podcast.

Andrew, any final words for the people listening?

I got some new cats.

Okay.

Oh, my God.

Find out about his new cats next time.

Bye.

What about our final words?

I just gave to Andrew.

Be on the lookout for pigeon merch.