Snake Closeness // Gavin vs Squirrels [58]

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Speaker 2 Hello, and welcome to another episode of the Regulation Podcast. This is number 58.
I'm Jeff. Got Eric, Andrew, Nick, and Eric here with me as well.
Duh boys as they need to be referred to.

Speaker 2 Did I say Eric twice?

Speaker 3 I'm not even sure.

Speaker 4 Hey, guy don't like me likes hearing his name, so just say it four times, man.

Speaker 2 Double.

Speaker 4 Happy to be here, and happy to be here. Okay,

Speaker 5 what if we do this? What if we do this? Eric, at the end of this recording, you take my audio file and you re-record everything I said. Yeah.

Speaker 5 And then there'll be two Eric's in the episode, and people have to figure out who was who.

Speaker 4 Yeah,

Speaker 4 I think they would know right away just from this conversation.

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 2 It's probably short circuits.

Speaker 4 You just said, hey, Eric, do this.

Speaker 5 I would love to listen to a double Eric cut and just see how it sounds.

Speaker 4 I think that would be the lowest listened to episode. They'd just be like, too much of this guy.

Speaker 2 No, thanks. You know, like Captain Crunch oops all Barry's regulation oops all Eric's.

Speaker 3 Terrible.

Speaker 2 Eric just plays every role in the podcast.

Speaker 6 An endless echo chamber of this sucks.

Speaker 2 Christ. Well, that was a flawless beginning to the episode.

Speaker 2 Very excited. Hey, I did something yesterday.
I prepared something for you guys. I'm kind of jazzed about.

Speaker 2 I went on, it was my first bike ride of the year, really, and I went on a bike ride in the way I used to back when we would do face.

Speaker 2 and I would go for a ride and I would just try to write down everything I saw on the bike ride and turn that into like things Jeff saw on his bike well I did I did that and I prepared it for you guys and I'd love to share it with you if you'd like please use your ass or someone else's it was on my ass and I know I know intimately because of the very particular pains that I have riding my bicycle long distances with my little ass uh First thing I thought about when I was on my bike ride doing, I was just riding around town lake looking for dead bodies as you do now on town lake because there's a new one about every three weeks.

Speaker 2 Haven't seen one yet, but I did see a bunch of cops milling around suspiciously, so who knows?

Speaker 2 But I was riding around and as I was looking at the swampy water, waiting to find a hand or a foot floating, I got to thinking about what was the last time I saw a snake.

Speaker 2 And I think it was on the trail about three years ago.

Speaker 3 A snake drove and like drove, I guess drove road, walked, slithered in front of me from one side of the trail to the other.

Speaker 2 And it

Speaker 2 scared the holy hell out of me, of course. And I got to thinking, I'm guaranteed to see another snake in my lifetime, but I don't know when.

Speaker 2 So it's really kind of like that movie It Follows.

Speaker 2 You know what I mean? Like every day I wake up, I'm closer to seeing my next snake. And I don't, I don't know when or where, so there's nothing I can do to prepare about it.

Speaker 2 But also, right now on this planet, there is a snake somewhere or the parents of a snake somewhere who are making decisions that put them closer and closer to interacting and intersecting with me and my life at some point in the undefined future.

Speaker 2 And that thought terrifies me.

Speaker 5 But it's not guarantee.

Speaker 2 Yeah, it's not. I think it's pretty guaranteed that I'm going to see a snake again in my future.

Speaker 3 When was it going to be a big one? You think I'm going to go the next 50 years?

Speaker 2 Like, I just told you, Dickhead, three years ago on the trip.

Speaker 3 You did just say that. That's how this whole started.

Speaker 6 You played GTA?

Speaker 4 Did you just say you're going to live for another 50 years?

Speaker 2 Oh, at least. I'm going to hit 100 for sure.

Speaker 3 Hell yeah.

Speaker 4 Just like it. Spite is like a motivator and like you're just like writing it out.

Speaker 2 See, that's the thing. My family lives into their mid to late 90s and they do it without the spite that fuels me, right?

Speaker 2 Like the spite thing is, I think, unique to me and my personality and my family. So I feel like I might also technology, things are advancing rapidly thanks to AI.
I might eke out 150. Who knows?

Speaker 2 Maybe we'll get to a point where I can download my consciousness into some sort of computer software and I'll just be eternal. But I do think that with modern medicine, I'm good for 100.

Speaker 2 Maybe I'd like to top out it.

Speaker 2 I mean, I'd like to get to 150 if I could, but

Speaker 2 I'll be happy to hit the century mark. So I figure, you know, that's roughly 50 more years of life.
I think about how many snakes I saw in the first 50 years, dozens and dozens, if not 100, right? So

Speaker 2 there'll be some measure of snake in my future. And every day that I live puts me closer and closer to that snake.

Speaker 5 and i don't like that that's like 2700 more podcasts

Speaker 2 i mean assuming you guys live that long that's a good point you're not going to keep going without us uh

Speaker 6 well you know what we'll cross that bridge when we get to it who knows who can say every episode of soul all right will just be did i see snake today

Speaker 4 Didn't we talk about the podcast not going on if one of us dies, unless it's Andrew and he said it's fine if Nick isn't here?

Speaker 2 Oh, that's true. Oh, yeah, what the fuck?

Speaker 7 That is true.

Speaker 6 That's not at all what I said. said that's literally the opposite of what i said oh yeah

Speaker 6 nick is so malleable not that you should be thrilled nick i think i said that i would kill nick because it would end the show because the scenario was if one of us died if you had to kill one of us or if we had the authority to kill somebody else in the group yeah we all wanted nick to live we all said first nick is most important to live and andrew said nope i'm gonna take him out first yeah just so it would end

Speaker 4 was that was that the stipulation that it would just, you would kill him and it would end?

Speaker 6 Well, yeah, because everyone agreed who was the most important.

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 2 That would be like, yeah, the death knell for the show.

Speaker 3 Everyone agreed.

Speaker 4 He's most important, so you'd kill him.

Speaker 3 Yeah, that was the point.

Speaker 5 To end it, he said. To end it.
Right. It was a joke.

Speaker 2 Funny joke. This is

Speaker 2 the only podcast I've ever done. You know, there could be

Speaker 2 additional and different podcasts in the future. Nick, you can take the mask off.

Speaker 2 So, Jeff, are you saying there's potentially more than 2,700 podcasts in you? Oh, I would hope so.

Speaker 3 I don't think so, man.

Speaker 2 I'll be happy if I get 27 more podcasts out of this body and this brain and this mouth.

Speaker 2 But anyway, so that was my first thought was that

Speaker 2 I'm essentially living in a snake follows horror movie situation, and there's next to nothing I can do about it. Other than to move to a place with no snakes.

Speaker 2 But even then, people import snakes, you know? I've seen final destination. Weird shit happens.

Speaker 2 If the universe wants to put a snake in front of me, it's going to put a snake in front of me no matter where I am.

Speaker 2 I could be on the international space station, and the universe could see fit to put a snake in front of me if it wanted to.

Speaker 5 Last week, I could have said it's probably been a decade since I'd seen a snake, but uh, I did see one this week. Really? Dead, obliterated snake.

Speaker 3 Yeah, are you serious?

Speaker 5 Yeah, his head was all smashed up.

Speaker 2 Oh, thank god, where was it?

Speaker 5 It was right outside my house.

Speaker 2 It was probably coming to get you.

Speaker 3 Someone intervened.

Speaker 2 Somebody saved your life.

Speaker 2 That snake might have been hired. It might have been a snake assassin.
It might have been minutes away from ending your life and somebody drove over it and fucking.

Speaker 5 How would a snake get? Would it come up a drain?

Speaker 5 What's the easiest way to get in as a snake?

Speaker 3 Toilet. Drain?

Speaker 2 Any hole. It doesn't care.

Speaker 2 Snake's going to find a way in, man.

Speaker 6 Toilet snake.

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 6 I don't trust it.

Speaker 2 I don't trust a snake in space.

Speaker 5 I've got a different animal that's got in. What?

Speaker 5 My office bog

Speaker 5 has a ceiling full of squirrels.

Speaker 3 What? What? What?

Speaker 4 Excuse me? What?

Speaker 5 Yeah, whenever I'm shitting, I can hear him eating the ceiling and tearing up the insulation and stuff.

Speaker 2 Have you called anyone?

Speaker 5 No.

Speaker 5 No. I just in case.

Speaker 3 How long?

Speaker 3 oh it's been probably a month I just uh oh my god

Speaker 2 of just throwing throwing a tissue box at the ceiling every time a chicken dumps and shut up so it's done a month's worth of damage while you've sat on your ass doing nothing to stop it

Speaker 5 yeah honestly I thought the fact that they're already in I just assumed the damage was unfathomable and they're probably all over the house So rather than stop them, you do nothing?

Speaker 2 He's allowing them to advance.

Speaker 5 I threw a tissue box. I just told you

Speaker 5 i can i can send you a video of what it sounds like

Speaker 5 please please i don't know how i'm gonna do it without nitro

Speaker 5 i also don't know how i'm gonna find the video because my camera roll is full of blueprints pictures

Speaker 2 totally wrecked my camera all once we get past this fascinating saga that i don't want to get off of anytime soon i do have more bike stuff Yeah.

Speaker 5 Keep going because it's still camping a just to find this.

Speaker 4 Well, I just want, I think Gavin should start redecorating for his squirrel bathroom in those pictures that I sent.

Speaker 2 Just go full squirrel, welcome them.

Speaker 4 Yeah. And this is, this is there.
And then there's one squirrel with a plunger.

Speaker 3 This is right. This is helpful.

Speaker 2 They're going to, they're here to help.

Speaker 6 He's living reverse mousetrap.

Speaker 6 Oh.

Speaker 2 You should start assigning them tasks to do around the house and chores.

Speaker 2 They're just really going for it you can hear how violent they are with the the stuff up there well they're probably multiplying and oh my god dude dude yeah yeah are you gonna call somebody

Speaker 5 uh yeah

Speaker 5 when

Speaker 5 i i have a problem with with people in that no one ever calls me back or emails me back if i'm like hey i need a electrician i'll send an email to like three companies and no one ever replies dude

Speaker 2 dude i got my dishwasher fixed this morning before we started recording. It has been a four-month saga getting it fixed just because of getting people to return calls.
You are not wrong, Gav.

Speaker 5 It is impossible. It's demoralizing.

Speaker 6 I'm just thinking about your entire rooster teeth run and none on the emails you replied to.

Speaker 3 Awesome.

Speaker 2 Yeah, but these joints are awesome.

Speaker 2 well karma, you know

Speaker 5 I feel like we were not replying for different reasons

Speaker 5 people want the business

Speaker 2 oh god damn that's awesome

Speaker 2 oh man

Speaker 5 that's a valid point

Speaker 2 I've decided on my ride yesterday morning that Austin is officially a big city.

Speaker 2 And you can mark it by the fact that at 7:30 in the morning, the entire city smells like hot piss.

Speaker 2 Everywhere I went was just

Speaker 2 people pissing. Drunk people piss smells.
The unhoused people piss smells. Runners,

Speaker 2 you know, can't hold it and pop off the trail piss smells. Everywhere you go in Austin in the morning on a humid morning smells like piss.
So we are officially like

Speaker 2 New York City smells like hot shit and piss. We don't have the shit smell, but we definitely are over-indexing on piss this day, which got me thinking, right? I noticed in a meeting.

Speaker 2 I was like, oh, fuck, people have pissed here. That's a lot.

Speaker 2 You take it for granted that we piss in toilets now, but for almost the entirety of recorded human history, it must have smelled worse than Austin smelled when I was riding my bike yesterday morning because piss and shit was everywhere and we weren't clean and we had outhouses.

Speaker 2 And then you would take all your piss and shit from under your bed and the bowls that you would hold it in it overnight and you would throw it out the window onto the fucking street down below in the morning and the canals would run with piss and shit.

Speaker 2 Until about 150 years ago, Earth must have smelled horrible. Humans must have constantly encountered the smell of acrid stale piss everywhere they went.

Speaker 5 I assume it smelled like a zoo.

Speaker 3 Yeah,

Speaker 2 it must have, right?

Speaker 5 I mean, nothing was pissier than working downtown, though, in Congress. Some of those alleyways.
Geez, like going from parking to the office, it's a shit obstacle course.

Speaker 2 Pissy alleyways are small city problems. It's when the piss makes its way to the main thoroughfares.
That's when you know you've really

Speaker 3 yeah.

Speaker 4 God damn. I mean, like, you're right.
Think about like entire human history, everything is all outdoor.

Speaker 4 And then, like, the last hundred years, imagine somebody came to you and they're like, yeah, so that thing that's outside that you go and you fucking stink up like crazy, we're going to put that like connected to your bedroom.

Speaker 4 It's going to be inside your house now. And then you just go, you're going to what?

Speaker 3 Huh?

Speaker 4 Like there's no way it made any sense the first time somebody pitched it, right?

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 2 It's insane.

Speaker 4 It's, it's weird.

Speaker 2 Humanity is, it was disgusting until about 125, 150 years ago, I'd say. The next observation I had is that

Speaker 2 coffee shops in Austin are multiplying like gremlins. There is a new coffee shop on every corner of the city every week.
It's fucking crazy.

Speaker 2 I know we're, we're currently either done with filming Good Morning Gustavo or between seasons, so we're not going to them all. But god damn, Eric, have you noticed this or is it just me?

Speaker 4 No, yeah, they're, they're everywhere a lot.

Speaker 4 New ones that I'd never seen before just keep popping up. And I like, again, I don't, this isn't a complaint.
I think it's great to have more of that stuff. But boy, it feels like

Speaker 4 after COVID, it was like ramping up. And then now it's like, hey, go, go, go, go, go.

Speaker 3 more, go, go, go.

Speaker 4 It's a lot. It's breakneck right now.

Speaker 2 I probably saw four yesterday on my bike ride that didn't exist a month ago. I just like, yeah, every time you turn around, it's like tattoo shops were in the 90s and early 2000s here.

Speaker 5 Do you think coffee shop owners have all colluded to try and keep Good Morning Gustavo going as long as possible?

Speaker 4 They, yeah, they've tried, but we're going to break them.

Speaker 3 I swear to God.

Speaker 2 We'll see.

Speaker 2 I had two other things from the bike ride. Well,

Speaker 6 sorry, before you move on, have you considered going to these coffee shops and asking why?

Speaker 3 Why?

Speaker 4 Hi, hi, I was just riding my bike.

Speaker 3 Why?

Speaker 6 Why? Why did you choose to do this?

Speaker 6 There's a shop down the street. There's a shop across the street.

Speaker 2 I can see three coffee shops from the deck of your coffee shop.

Speaker 3 Why? Why?

Speaker 3 I think it's fair.

Speaker 2 I'd love to know why.

Speaker 2 It must be demand, right? Because they're all fucking crowded. Because you'll pay any amount of money for coffee.

Speaker 2 I think that's what it boils down to.

Speaker 5 I would love to ask why in different shops and see if anyone actually answers a question.

Speaker 5 Whether they would say why what.

Speaker 2 Maybe you should start doing that.

Speaker 4 So just walk in and say why and then just see what they say.

Speaker 5 I think I should say, can I ask you a question first? So they expect something.

Speaker 2 Okay.

Speaker 3 Okay.

Speaker 5 And they don't think I'm trying to order something.

Speaker 3 Okay.

Speaker 4 And then you just say, and then you just say why.

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 4 Hi, can I ask you a question? Oh, wow. Are you the guy from Slow-Mo Guys? Yeah, I'll be asking the questions around here.

Speaker 4 Why? And then

Speaker 4 they're flummoxed. I like it.

Speaker 2 And they go,

Speaker 2 I'm so glad you asked. We are big believers in cheese.
So we decided to open up an artisanal cheese shop that you have walked into. And it's our life passion.

Speaker 2 making and selling different cheeses from the world. And this is why.

Speaker 5 I think potentially I could,

Speaker 5 as I say why, I could shrug my shoulders a little bit with my hands pointed up and maybe just like gesture around at the ceiling and walls and stuff.

Speaker 5 That might help.

Speaker 4 Just why just I just imagine Gavin walking. Like, you don't have the guts.
That's very exciting to hear. You don't have the guts.

Speaker 4 You don't have the fucking guts to do it, but I really love the idea of Gavin walking in and saying why.

Speaker 5 I'm scared to talk to anyone who I've known for less than six months.

Speaker 4 You're only just now sort of talking to my wife, and it's mostly about the moon. And it's like, so I just, oh, God, I would love to see this happen.
You would have to be.

Speaker 3 We're talking about the moon and pressure.

Speaker 2 He's a month into getting up the courage to call about an infestation in his ceiling, for Christ's sake.

Speaker 5 Oh, I posted the video. Do you want to listen to this video?

Speaker 3 Yes. Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 4 If you give it just a second, I'm uploading it to Discord, something that it seems like you could have done.

Speaker 5 I don't have nitro.

Speaker 3 Do I have nitro? Yes, you have nitro.

Speaker 4 Oh, hell yeah. Hey, guys, check this out.
I have nitro.

Speaker 4 Wait, why don't you just get nitro then?

Speaker 5 I would, it's, I have to wait for you to give me permission.

Speaker 4 Okay, get nitro. Okay.

Speaker 3 Oh, my God.

Speaker 3 What the day is on?

Speaker 3 That's fucked. Oh, my God.

Speaker 5 Yeah, I threw a bog roll because it's just so loud.

Speaker 3 I can't concentrate on one or two.

Speaker 3 Shut up.

Speaker 2 You gotta get that fixed immediately.

Speaker 3 Yeah, you can't

Speaker 3 go out of control. That's bad.

Speaker 5 I just wish anyone, anywhere would it return a call email me. Get the squirrels out of my freaking ceiling.

Speaker 2 And that's not even

Speaker 5 my main squirrel problem. I've got them stuffing my freaking gutters with my beard still.
My whole grill is full of a squirrel nest. It's bullets.

Speaker 5 Did I send you the video from my grill?

Speaker 3 No. I'll hold that on going as well.

Speaker 5 Keep filling for a bit.

Speaker 4 You just said that you're... You said that your gutters are filled with your hair.
And now your grill is filled with squirrel stuff.

Speaker 5 Yeah, so the area that I shaved, uh i just put my beard down there and then the squirrels nick nick my beard and put it in my rain gutters so now water just spills over them onto the door frames and stuff are you sure that's not birds no i mean it's it's squirrels and birds

Speaker 4 oh wow changing is tune this is why they won't call you back dude

Speaker 5 guys like sir what is it is it squirrels or is it birds what do you want what am i supposed to do here the squirrels steal my uh couch cushion cushion stuffing and mix it with my beard.

Speaker 5 And the birds just take the beard.

Speaker 2 Yeah, we had squirrels. We have the same problem with squirrels.
Ripping out our cushions. The little fuckers, man.
They completely dismantled a floor mat outside.

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Speaker 6 They can be your killers, Jeff.

Speaker 2 Well, you know what? There was an update actually on the subreddit from a wildlife biologist who said, Jeff's serial killer, a wildlife biologist perspective.

Speaker 2 They said, I think he nailed it with raccoon. The first time he said he found a bird without a head, I was guessing raccoon.
Why? Because they're assholes.

Speaker 2 They're known to eat only the parts of things they kill and they'll kill even for fun. This is by Bleep Bloop3008.

Speaker 3 I think he's

Speaker 3 information.

Speaker 2 But how? Birds, you ask? Raccoons are nocturnal. Birds sleep at night.
Sleeping birds are much easier to catch.

Speaker 2 And then they tell a story about how they used to catch ducks in these traps so that they could tag them.

Speaker 2 And sometimes raccoons will come along and see the ducks trapped in the cages and they'll just go snap their necks for fun.

Speaker 8 Jesus. Oh my God.

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 2 And then somebody else in the comments was like, I'm pretty sure it's probably a cat.

Speaker 3 I really don't think so.

Speaker 2 I haven't, none of my neighbors have cats, and I have never seen a cat in my yard.

Speaker 2 I feel like if there was that much murder going on in my yard, I would at least see the cat hanging out from time to time. I think that's true.
Is that enough vamp for you, Geff?

Speaker 3 Yeah, I mean, when are you showing this?

Speaker 4 When are we showing? When are we seeing your squirrel grill?

Speaker 2 Come on.

Speaker 5 It'll take me a bit.

Speaker 2 He's got to scroll through blueprints.

Speaker 4 Yeah, drop a couple blueprints photos in here to hold us over, buddy.

Speaker 2 He has to upload it to Eric so that then Eric can upload it to

Speaker 2 On the trail yesterday, I saw something quite shocking, if I'm being honest with you. On one end of the trail that I take, it's like an 11-mile loop, essentially, or a 10 and a half mile loop.

Speaker 2 And on one end by the dam over on the east, far east side of Austin,

Speaker 2 there's a lot of crazy people on the trail because we're a big city now. We have big city problems and there's a lot of like aggressive, crazy people.

Speaker 2 And so I'm always having to keep a lookout, right? Because a couple months ago, there was a dude at Auditorium Shores and Zucker Park with a machete hacking people up. Oh my God.

Speaker 2 Almost cut somebody's arm off and it was like at two in the afternoon. So I try to pay attention when I'm on my bike, you know, so I don't get macheteed.
And I saw a new one.

Speaker 2 I saw a dude who looked like he lived on the on the trail pretty, pretty wild-eyed. And he was walking around with, I'd never seen this one before, a hockey stick as a weapon.

Speaker 2 And I thought, wow, this is the first time for everything. Like I never even crossed my mind.
We're not a big hockey town in Austin, you know, but with the excessive heat and no ice and stuff.

Speaker 2 And I've just never seen a hockey stick in the wild like that. And I thought, wow, that's really interesting.
You don't see that every day.

Speaker 2 Then an hour later on the exact opposite side of Town Lake, where over by Barton Springs, I ran into a dude, a different dude, with a hockey stick walking the trail.

Speaker 3 What?

Speaker 2 I know, right? What is happening? Does that mean there's some sort of a hockey rivalry going on?

Speaker 2 Like one guy's got like, this is my side of the trail and the other guy's like, this this is my side of the trail.

Speaker 2 Or is there some sort of a like crazy person hockey league, field hockey league that they're doing?

Speaker 2 Did somebody break into and steal a bunch of hockey equipment from an academy and it made its way down to the trail?

Speaker 2 Like out of the blue, I've seen two hockey sticks to be used as, I assume, weapons on the trail on different, like these guys were six miles apart.

Speaker 4 You think it's viral marketing for the ice bats?

Speaker 2 It could be viral marketing for our local hockey team, the the Austin Ice Bats, but I don't think so.

Speaker 2 I think it's the weird. Let me know if you guys see any people out there swinging hockey sticks because apparently it's a thing now.

Speaker 3 Okay.

Speaker 2 Eric, thank you for uploading Gavin's video.

Speaker 3 Dude, no, honestly, guy like me, no problem. I got that.

Speaker 3 All right.

Speaker 4 This is a three and a half minute video, which I assume we're not watching all of.

Speaker 3 Yeah, we're in a grill.

Speaker 4 What are we looking at, Gavin?

Speaker 2 I hear rattles.

Speaker 4 Oh my God.

Speaker 4 Wait, wait, you have a camera inside your grill?

Speaker 5 Well, I went to grill something, right? And it was full of a bunch of twigs and sticks and my beard and the couch cushion

Speaker 5 scared the shit out of me.

Speaker 5 You don't have to watch any more than that, but that's what, that's the case with it. So I thought, oh, the squirrel's done this.
I'll put a camera in there.

Speaker 2 Can we put these on social media? These are very funny videos.

Speaker 3 What the hell?

Speaker 4 Dude, I'm about, I jumped minute 45 in. Squirrel's back.
Looking. Oh, dude, he's like right at the camera.
Oh, dude, he's attacking. Oh, oh, he's attacking the camera.

Speaker 5 He doesn't light the camera.

Speaker 4 Oh, and then he puts his ass in the camera.

Speaker 3 He's going at it. Dude, what the hell?

Speaker 5 I didn't remove the stuff because I thought maybe he's going to put baby squirrels in there, but he never did. Then this was like three months ago.

Speaker 2 Yeah. Dude, this is crazy.
You know what you can do if you want to handle it real fast?

Speaker 2 Just pop the top open, throw some lighter fluid on that, and light it.

Speaker 5 Why would I use lighter fluid when I can just turn the grill on?

Speaker 2 Oh, I guess it is a gas grill.

Speaker 2 I don't have a gas grill. I'm not a gas grill guy.

Speaker 5 I tied a rag around the handle just to remind me not to turn it on without clearing that out first.

Speaker 2 The last thing I thought of on my bike ride,

Speaker 2 I wanted to ask you guys a question. While I was riding around and I was watching, it was like maybe 7.15, 7.30, and I was downtown and everybody was going to work.

Speaker 2 They were like dudes with uncomfortable shoes, you know, like patent leather shoes with like thin socks and suits carrying briefcases and everybody's very smartly dressed and nobody looks happy and their hair is all slicked back or coffeed or whatever.

Speaker 2 And they're all going into tall buildings to spend all day in the tall buildings. And I was on my bicycle and I got hit.
with the biggest wave of this nostalgic feeling of playing hookie.

Speaker 2 Like when I was 10 or 11 and you'd play hooky and you'd see all the grownups, you know, going about their day and you were like fucking free to do whatever you wanted to.

Speaker 2 And I'm, you know, 49 years old. Obviously, it's ridiculous.
But the, the feeling was so palpable, it was like I was 12 years old again.

Speaker 2 And I got to thinking, this is like the best fucking feeling in the world. The feeling of getting to play hookie, which made me think two things.
One, I want to propose something to you guys.

Speaker 2 I propose that one day a year we get to call hookie

Speaker 2 and then we all go do stuff together. We go to like a movie, or we all get online and play video games that we're not recording, or we go for a bike ride, or however we want to present it and do it.

Speaker 2 Maybe, maybe we uh

Speaker 2 figure out a way that we're, you know, because we're not all in the same location that we can make it all work, but just one day a year, we get to call hookie and we all get to play hookie together.

Speaker 2 I think that would be so fun.

Speaker 3 That's cool. Um,

Speaker 2 yeah, like, oh, okay, so we're gonna go to six flags today or whatever, you know.

Speaker 5 So we all get one hookie per year or something.

Speaker 2 I think it would just be one hookie for all of us, okay? But I'm open to five hookies because that's five times the fun, you know?

Speaker 2 But the other thought I had was, what are the other best feelings in the world? Non-sexual, of course, not weird, but like that feeling of hookie was so fun and it felt so good.

Speaker 2 And then I thought about how we celebrate 5.01 p.m. on a Friday because it's the best time of the week.
So what are the other like best feelings in the world?

Speaker 5 I love the feeling of I'm having a very stressful dream about like an exam or some bullshit from my past.

Speaker 5 And then I wake up and it's not real yeah that's a good one and i'm just like oh i don't even have to i don't have to get up for anything i don't have to go to school i don't have to know algebra oh

Speaker 4 when you have that list of a million small things you get done and you knock off like

Speaker 4 all of it and then you sit down when it's done and you go I don't have to think that stuff that's just been taking up brain space for like weeks, it's all done.

Speaker 4 And I don't ever have to think about any of that stuff again. It's done.
It's all done. Finishing that list is so nice.

Speaker 2 That's a great one, Eric. That is a fucking great one for sure.

Speaker 6 For me, similar to Gavin, having a dream where you're trying to get home and you can't, and like it's just you're struggling to get there, you're on the wrong bus, or there's some big obstacle.

Speaker 6 And then realizing you're in a dream and can just wake up and you'll be home.

Speaker 4 Oh, it's good.

Speaker 6 Wake up all cozy in the bed.

Speaker 5 Yeah, teleport.

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 5 A good, a good shit.

Speaker 5 Shit that's been really, really sitting in you and making you uncomfortable for a while. Blast it out.

Speaker 3 Hell yeah.

Speaker 4 You're talking about waking up from a dream or whatever. When you wake up in the middle of the night, not like a startle, whatever.
You're just like, oh man, I got to go do this.

Speaker 4 I got to wake up at like a certain time or whatever. And you roll over and you look at the clock and it's like 3.10 a.m.
And you're like, I don't have to be up.

Speaker 4 for another four or five hours, like whatever it is. Like you just have that amount of time.
You think you only get 30 more minutes of sleep.

Speaker 4 You roll over, you see the time, you're like, I have six more hours to sleep. This is great.
You roll back over. Oh, it's the best.
It's the best.

Speaker 3 That can go the other way.

Speaker 6 Oh, yeah. That can be a negative.
I've had times where like I'll wake up and I'll feel like, oh, I'm awake. And then I'll realize, oh, I got five more hours of sleep, or three more I can sleep.

Speaker 6 And then I'll wake up more tired somehow on the other end of the three hours than I did when I initially woke up.

Speaker 3 Oh, dude, I don't know. I know what you mean.
Whoa.

Speaker 3 I get that totally.

Speaker 2 I, uh, when I was like 13, I got an alarm clock and I

Speaker 2 one night I woke up at like, I don't know, one in the morning to take a piss. And I thought it was like four.
And I saw that it was only one.

Speaker 2 And I was like, oh my God, I get like five extra hours of sleep. And that next morning, I felt like I'd gotten double sleep.

Speaker 2 So I started setting my alarm for like two, one or two in the morning so that I could wake up, see that it was one or two in the morning and then go back to sleep because I briefly thought that it would make me sleep better.

Speaker 2 Did not. Did not.
I stopped doing it pretty quickly, but I probably did it like four days in a row. Jeff, I did that for like two months.

Speaker 3 Did you really?

Speaker 4 Mathematically, it made sense.

Speaker 5 Are you serious? You're not talking about just having a new kid? You actually did that?

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 2 I sent an alarm for 1 a.m., got extra sleep.

Speaker 2 I just remember feeling so refreshed that day and being like, it like doubled my sleep somehow. I got to try this again.
And then

Speaker 2 every day it was like, it didn't work last night. I don't know what I did differently.

Speaker 4 Nick calling it extra sleep is so crazy.

Speaker 7 Well, I I was thinking you enjoy, you know, that good night's sleep so much. What if you did it twice in the same night?

Speaker 2 Exactly.

Speaker 5 What if you did it five times?

Speaker 6 Yeah, at what point does it become bad sleep?

Speaker 2 You'd be hibernating.

Speaker 5 Well, a sleep cycle is almost like four hours, isn't it? Like a four-one?

Speaker 6 I think so.

Speaker 5 So, as long as you do four and four, it's probably the same as getting eight.

Speaker 5 I don't know how sleep works. I'm not sure anyone does.
I think everyone's chatting shit with sleep.

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 3 Why doesn't I need to do it?

Speaker 5 It doesn't make any sense.

Speaker 2 Once again, my relationship to how I feel in the morning when I wake up bears no resemblance to what my aura ring tells me my sleep was like.

Speaker 2 Like I'm fucking exhausted and it's like, no, dude, you had the best night of sleep of your life. Or I wake up and I'm like, oh, I feel fucking great.
Nope, you don't feel great at all.

Speaker 2 You got a 72% sleep last night.

Speaker 3 You had a 20% drop-off, dickhead.

Speaker 5 Yeah, you wake up feeling refreshed. It's like, hey, what was going on with your heart last night? Jesus.

Speaker 6 David, if you could opt out of sleep entirely, would you?

Speaker 5 Oh, yeah.

Speaker 3 Really? Big time.

Speaker 5 I take I take no pleasure in it. I want to teleport from night to morning.

Speaker 3 Oh, man, I love it.

Speaker 6 It's fun. The waking up is fun.

Speaker 5 Yeah, but I just get, I spent, I waste so much time trying to sleep.

Speaker 3 That's fair.

Speaker 6 That's a good point.

Speaker 6 I like waking up and just events happened in the world and just being able to see, like, oh, what's going on? What happened? I was out. I wasn't present for a while.

Speaker 2 It is nice that when you go to sleep, when you wake up, you know, Reddit is refreshed a a little bit.

Speaker 2 Are you guys going laboo booing this weekend?

Speaker 3 No.

Speaker 5 Okay.

Speaker 2 That's a whole thing that happens every weekend now that I can't get Gavin to go. Me and his wife and Emily and whoever.

Speaker 5 Vanessa. I just.

Speaker 2 Kristen went last weekend.

Speaker 5 Do you go every week?

Speaker 2 I'm going this weekend and I went last weekend, so I guess so.

Speaker 5 And it's just so that there's like an extra slot to buy something because they're limited per customer.

Speaker 2 They get their little monster things, yeah. Purse charms or whatever they are.

Speaker 5 I don't know. I just don't, I just don't know how much time I want to dedicate to the latest

Speaker 5 landfill craze.

Speaker 4 Yeah, I mean, I mean, zero is probably like the right amount.

Speaker 2 I don't know. It's fun.
He's goofing around and hanging out in the worst lines, the worst organized sales you've ever seen in your entire life. It is amazing how bad some people are at stuff.

Speaker 4 Is that your pitch?

Speaker 3 Did you just

Speaker 3 went like it's great? Oh, the worst lines you got. I got urban.

Speaker 2 Okay. There was free.
I got a free donut and some soda as well.

Speaker 3 You did get cool.

Speaker 2 Pretty fancy donut. It was delicious.
And I don't know. I just like hanging out with people doing stuff.
You know, something different.

Speaker 5 Hanging out, but

Speaker 5 if I'm lining up with friends, I want... I want to be excited about the thing I'm lining up for.

Speaker 3 Dude, but they're so excited.

Speaker 2 I enjoy their enthusiasm.

Speaker 2 oh i don't get laboo boo like they're they're on cloud nine they couldn't be happier they race to the car to rip open the boxes and see what color their little fucking uh stuffed animal is and i don't know it's fun to watch them be happy and excited about stuff i get into other people's joy yeah that's fair and it's only gonna last like another two weeks before they move on to something else so i just you know enjoy it while it's around Yeah, I just

Speaker 5 standing out in the heat for ages, I just feel like shit.

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 2 we did spend a lot of time making fun of you specifically for not doing it.

Speaker 5 I'm not good at that.

Speaker 6 If I was in control of a toy company, it would be a like when Blockbuster could have bought Netflix for Laboo Boo with me because I don't get it.

Speaker 6 Like, if somebody showed me Labuboo I'd be like, we don't need to make these. Nobody wants these.
It's the biggest toy craze ever.

Speaker 4 Yeah, honestly, skip this one.

Speaker 3 Yeah, we just pass on this.

Speaker 2 It is one of those things that it connects with people in a way that it doesn't with me, and I can't quite see it. But I find that in itself to be kind of fascinating and appealing, you know? Mm-hmm.

Speaker 6 Yeah, that's totally fair.

Speaker 2 Like they see something in that deal that I don't. Like, I don't think it's cute in the way they do, but they lose their fucking minds.
Like, oh my God.

Speaker 2 Emily spends an hour a night when she gets home from work watching TikToks of Mokoko, whatever the fuck that is.

Speaker 3 I don't, I don't, it's a laboo boo. It's the oh, Makoko is one of the

Speaker 2 Makoko is a laboo boo. It is a labooboo.

Speaker 4 Makoko's a laboobus or elves. Guys, if you're listening to this, Makoko is a laboo boo.
If you feel like you're having a stroke, you're not. Simply put, Makoko is a laboo boo.

Speaker 2 I'm pretty sure the other one isn't a labooboo, the one with the tail, but the Makoko is, even though it's got the heart nose, but it's it's it's a it's like the princess or the

Speaker 2 mom or the

Speaker 2 fairy or something. They're little elves, right? And the Makoko is one of them, but also elevated in some way.
I don't know. It's complicated.

Speaker 4 I'm going throwback with some collectible stuff. This comes out in July.
Peanuts, Tamagotchi, Snoopy.

Speaker 3 Oh, that's so cool. Oh,

Speaker 3 isn't that awesome?

Speaker 4 I don't care about this at all.

Speaker 4 I want it because the little NES looking graphics on the bottom where it's like, it's Snoopy, and then he's Safari Snoopy and Pirate Snoopy and Joe Cool and all that stuff.

Speaker 4 I'm like, dude, dressing my Snoopy up. I can't wait for this thing.

Speaker 5 I'm bummed that Tamagotchi technology didn't really advance beyond its first few iterations.

Speaker 6 What do you want from it?

Speaker 5 Yeah, it just looks like that looks like 1994.

Speaker 2 I think that's part of the charm.

Speaker 4 Yeah, I mean, I kind of like the way that I like the NES. Yeah, I like the NES.

Speaker 4 If that was like high-res Snoopies, I wouldn't be as interested as the NES-looking Snoopies. Yeah.
You know what I mean?

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 4 Like, look at that one on the, he's like wearing like a little hat. It's pretty exciting.
He's like, man of mystery, that's Snoopy.

Speaker 6 There's something about

Speaker 6 how simple it looks that like taps into childhood for me. Like if it was cleaner or crisper, like it wouldn't hit the same.
There's something,

Speaker 6 yeah, childish about the way.

Speaker 5 I've been a...

Speaker 5 I switched my Apple TV screensavers to Snoopy, and I'm enjoying the Ultra HD Snoopy adventures that are happening on my telly.

Speaker 4 I got to get an Apple TV just for that. I don't have Apple TV.
I think I might have to get one just to watch the Snoopy screensavers and not subscribe to anything.

Speaker 5 Do you have a watch?

Speaker 3 No.

Speaker 2 I guess I should switch to those.

Speaker 2 They're entertaining.

Speaker 5 Oh, I love them.

Speaker 4 He's probably getting into all kinds of trouble. He's probably hanging out with Woodstock.
He's probably flying around in his doghouse. Yeah.
He's fighting the Red Baron dude.

Speaker 5 Snoopy's trying to have a little kip on his doghouse, and Woodstock's just pissing him off.

Speaker 3 It's great.

Speaker 2 He's just kipping. I think at the end of the day, though

Speaker 2 you're just

Speaker 2 the aesthetic of your childhood is forever imprinted on you you know yeah and so it'll always it'll always appeal to you but i i always do appreciate a remaster like if i'm gonna go back and play halo 2 now i'm definitely playing with new graphics well yeah i'm not i'm not playing the old oblivion that's for sure

Speaker 5 but like if if the screensaver the Snoopy screensaver was a Tamagotchi in a way where you had to feed him or die or whatever, I would be into it.

Speaker 4 Yeah, I think they're just, I think like playing a game like that would be fun. There's just the

Speaker 4 nostalgia of giant head tiny body Snoopy that looks like little block graphics that I really enjoy, but I think I would enjoy the Apple TV screensavers just as much. I gotta,

Speaker 4 do I have to subscribe to anything to get that or can they just give it to me?

Speaker 5 No, but I tell you what, though, we should just, I'll bring my Apple TV to the office and we can just put it on our tower.

Speaker 4 Oh, that's rock and hang a TV next to Andrew's watchful eye, and then I can just watch Snoopy screensavers.

Speaker 2 We can watch that instead of reruns of Wipeout over and over again.

Speaker 5 Yeah, because they look like dog shit.

Speaker 4 Dude, they look bad on our 90-inch TV.

Speaker 5 I think it's 86.

Speaker 3 Yeah, 86.

Speaker 6 Makoko, is that what you said, Jeff? You're bringing up Makoko or something? Yeah.

Speaker 3 Yeah, I believe it.

Speaker 6 In Expedition 33, there's a character named Monaco, which is not Makoko, but I would absolutely buy a Laboo Boo if it looked like that.

Speaker 2 Just a weird looking wooden guy with a speed up.

Speaker 6 Yeah, he's got like a head mask thing.

Speaker 6 But I've been, I've been playing a lot of Expedition 33, and I brought this up to Gavin, but I want to bring it up on the podcast so we could pressure him into doing this.

Speaker 6 But I encountered the number one villain in Gavin's heart in that game. There is a boss

Speaker 3 named Chromatic Aberration.

Speaker 2 I think I immediately texted Gavin.

Speaker 6 I was like, we need to make content where you cannot stop playing this until you defeat your enemy, chromatic aberration.

Speaker 5 There should be an Easter egg in that game where if you stumble across this boss and you start fighting him, and then you go to the menu and settings and turn off chromatic aberration, he should just vanish from the game.

Speaker 3 That's a great idea. Really?

Speaker 4 That's so Kojima.

Speaker 2 That's Makoko. They look different.

Speaker 3 I can tell they're related.

Speaker 6 Honestly, Labu Boo looks like they would fit in Expedition 33. There is kind of a

Speaker 6 weird aesthetic to it.

Speaker 5 They make me sick.

Speaker 4 I think I'm with Gavin.

Speaker 2 What makes you sick?

Speaker 5 This disgusts me.

Speaker 2 Chromatic aberration or the stuffed animal?

Speaker 5 Just the little boo-boo.

Speaker 4 Well, that's Mokoko.

Speaker 5 Oh, that's not a laboobu?

Speaker 2 Well, Makoko is a lubooboo, yeah.

Speaker 4 Mokoko is a lubooboo, not like Monaco. Monaco knows chromatic aberration.

Speaker 2 Do you know how much that one I just posted cost?

Speaker 4 It's going to make me mad. I think it's 90 pounds.

Speaker 2 So

Speaker 2 the rub with Makoko, as I understand it, is that you cannot buy Makoko from Pop Mart, the store. You have to go to Pop Land, the theme park in China to get it.
And so on Stock X and stuff,

Speaker 2 a Makoko will run you about $180 to $200.

Speaker 3 God,

Speaker 2 Jesus, dude. Same size as the other ones, by the way.

Speaker 3 Little. Wow.

Speaker 5 You don't fancy standing in line in China?

Speaker 2 Well,

Speaker 2 I do, but the plane ticket alone is going to be more than just paying the 150. Also, I don't want it, I just enjoy watching other people want it.

Speaker 6 Jeff, was Marcus Smart your laboo boo?

Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah, Marcus Smart's my labo-boo. Marcus Washington Wizard Smart is my labo-boo.

Speaker 5 I'm surprised Furby didn't do more collabs.

Speaker 5 Why isn't there a labooboo Furby?

Speaker 2 I think Furby existed in a time before collabs.

Speaker 4 Yeah, it's a great point. It's a really good point.

Speaker 7 He stood alone.

Speaker 2 Plus, I don't know if Furby's big enough. Labubu collabs with Coke.

Speaker 3 Really?

Speaker 5 Yeah, but Furby was hot shit. There was one Christmas where everyone was trying to get a Furby.

Speaker 2 That's true. Yeah.

Speaker 6 There will be one year of everyone trying to get Labubu.

Speaker 3 I thought he was holding a gun. I thought that that was a rifle.

Speaker 4 I did not immediately register as a Coca-Cola bottle. I thought that that was a weapon.

Speaker 5 That's next year's collab with Glock.

Speaker 2 Oh, yeah, yeah. That was it for my bike ride.

Speaker 6 That was quite the bike ride.

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 5 Yeah, I think we should do a group bike ride to see what adventures we all we should all just do a bike ride and then we'll all remember stuff and see if we remembered the same stuff from the trip.

Speaker 2 Yeah. And keep your eyes out for hockey sticks because they're out there.

Speaker 5 And dead bodies and snakes.

Speaker 2 And dead bodies and snakes. Yeah.

Speaker 2 I hope it's a long time before I see a snake.

Speaker 3 I do too for you.

Speaker 6 Have you seen these SpongeBob labubus?

Speaker 3 No,

Speaker 3 is that a real thing?

Speaker 6 They're SpongeBob laboobus, yeah, and they look nothing like the labubus. I don't understand how these are laboobus, but these are the SpongeBob labos.

Speaker 4 These are so much worse. These are so much worse.

Speaker 3 Oh, yeah, SpongeBob Labs.

Speaker 4 I don't like looking at a single one of these things. This is, I don't like this at all.
That Mr.

Speaker 3 Krabs is fucked up. It's just Mr.

Speaker 2 Krabs in specific is disturbing.

Speaker 3 And

Speaker 2 yes, SpongeBob

Speaker 2 with the pumpkin is weird.

Speaker 5 Do you think the guy in the factory is like installing this injection mold plate and just going like

Speaker 2 hey, Gav, check it out? It's Cave Bob SpongeMan.

Speaker 5 We should do that BMX tracker GTA again.

Speaker 3 Okay.

Speaker 3 All right. I'd love to.

Speaker 2 I'd absolutely love to.

Speaker 2 Hey, I saw a TikTok about a prank that I wanted to play on one of you guys, but I've decided not to do it because I don't think it'll be worth the fallout.

Speaker 2 But I would like to share the prank with you in case you want to play it on somebody else, you know.

Speaker 5 Is this the thing that you said you didn't want to do because it would end a friendship?

Speaker 2 I thought it might. Yeah.
I don't know how. I don't know how.

Speaker 2 Yeah. I don't know if you guys are cool enough.
to live with a prank like this for a long time but somebody this guy's

Speaker 2 i saw a tick tock of this dude he said if if you ever want to really screw somebody over for the rest of their lives, a friend of his about two or three years ago wrote his, in Sharpie, wrote his phone number inside a port-a-potty and said, send me pictures of your poop to this number.

Speaker 6 God damn it.

Speaker 2 And then he said, for about two weeks, he just got the most heinous construction worker blowout shits.

Speaker 2 And he couldn't do anything about it because each shit is coming for each text is coming from a different number.

Speaker 2 So there's no way to there's no way to block it right but then you know the port-a-potty gets moved from the site and it goes somewhere else and he says the the the the shit texts would stop for a while and then like three months later he'd get them for a month and then they'd go away for a while and then he would get them for like another month and for two years just every once in a while whenever that port-a-potty's in rotation somewhere he just gets the worst shits known to man texted to him and

Speaker 2 you have no idea where the port-a-potty is it's always moving right so there's no way to find it and remove it. So for the rest of the use of that port-a-body,

Speaker 2 he's just doomed to get shits,

Speaker 2 nasty shit tests.

Speaker 5 Frick it out.

Speaker 3 That's awful.

Speaker 5 I was on a Bacardi commercial once that was like five days long, and the medic kept sending me pictures of his wife's shits. And I was like,

Speaker 3 what?

Speaker 4 What are you talking about?

Speaker 3 What are you saying?

Speaker 3 What

Speaker 4 are you saying?

Speaker 5 What? His wife would text him her shits every day, and he'd be like, new one from the wife. And I'd be like, God.

Speaker 3 Damn, dude. What are you talking about?

Speaker 4 I'm like aghast at what you just said, man.

Speaker 3 Like, that is crazy.

Speaker 4 That might be one of the craziest things I've ever heard.

Speaker 3 What the fuck is it a kid? What are you talking about? And I was like 18.

Speaker 5 Maybe I was 19. I was just like, why does this guy like me so much?

Speaker 3 What?

Speaker 3 What?

Speaker 2 Do you think he wanted to do stuff with you?

Speaker 3 No, he was just...

Speaker 5 He was just

Speaker 5 latched onto me at the beginning of the shoot. He kept talking to me.
And I was like,

Speaker 5 being friendly at first. And then the shits came in.

Speaker 5 He got real familiar real fast.

Speaker 3 And then I was just like, oh, my God.

Speaker 2 Did he ever stop? Or did you just have to look at those shits the entirety of the shoot?

Speaker 5 Oh, it was the whole shoot.

Speaker 3 The shoot. Oh, no.
Never saw it again.

Speaker 2 This is what I love about this podcast.

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 2 I throw out a TikTok I saw that's a a funny prank. Gavin instantly has a real life story that trumps it by a thousand.

Speaker 3 Insane. Yeah.

Speaker 5 I don't know if you've spent a lot of time on sets, but the medics are bored. They don't often do stuff.

Speaker 5 I mean, they're very important to have when something happens.

Speaker 3 Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 5 They are just twiddling their thumbs.

Speaker 3 All goddamn day.

Speaker 2 They're also full of shit and very scared of ghosts, apparently.

Speaker 2 It was the fucking medics that shut down our harder shit because the lady saw an orb and it chased her through the woods.

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 3 A very real thing.

Speaker 4 Absolutely.

Speaker 2 Yeah. Yeah.
It was a medic.

Speaker 4 Oh my God.

Speaker 5 Okay.

Speaker 4 Crazy. Crazy.

Speaker 6 Have you ever tried to do a prank and somebody around you has shut it down?

Speaker 3 Probably a lot. Yeah.

Speaker 2 Probably a lot in achievement on there.

Speaker 2 But go on.

Speaker 6 My most recent one, I was talking. to somebody about someone that they don't talk to anymore.
Like I just, they, they had a falling falling out. They, they no longer speak.

Speaker 6 And they brought them up and they're not dead, but I just said, oh, yeah, they passed away recently. They're dead.

Speaker 6 Because I thought in my head, they wouldn't know and they would just think that this person was dead, that they were just shit talking. And that was funny to me.

Speaker 6 And I thought they'd just continue on their lives thinking that this person was dead, who's alive. And my partner was there in the conversation and immediately shut it down.
It was, it said, no,

Speaker 6 he's kidding. He's fine.

Speaker 3 He's not dead.

Speaker 4 And I was like, oh man, I really could have got him with that one.

Speaker 2 He definitely would have thought for quite a while until I probably told him that was a joke that that person was dead.

Speaker 2 I got a little too into setting people and stuff on fire for a while.

Speaker 2 I think people were told me to knock it off.

Speaker 3 You're just an arson kid.

Speaker 2 You went through an arson phase. You can't be setting people's shoes on fire anymore.
You got to stop that.

Speaker 2 That makes sense.

Speaker 2 Oh, what the fuck, dude?

Speaker 2 Kevin's not laughing because so much of his stuff comes through.

Speaker 2 This

Speaker 4 turned into like the weirdest last five minutes. Like,

Speaker 3 I'm...

Speaker 4 I'm like, just kind of sitting here stunned by everything you guys are saying. I just can't like

Speaker 4 wild, wild, wild, the stuff that you're saying right now.

Speaker 5 speaking of weird andrew guess who the first person was to get completely naked in the new office that's a great question oh who was it

Speaker 6 my instincts my guess would be jeff but i feel like that's too obvious i'm gonna say nick because he's the least i'd expect correct correct incredible guess incredible guess what happened nick

Speaker 2 I was at the office setting up some audio equipment and I uh I also had to finish an an episode edit. So I was setting that to export and I was like, I got like, you know, 30 minutes to kill.

Speaker 5 So I drove

Speaker 5 nearby to go shoot some hoops and

Speaker 2 came back and I was like, well, I'm all sweaty, but I have a change of clothes in the car. I was like, I do have a dinner planned, so I should probably not stink.
So I used the shower in the office.

Speaker 2 I turned it on.

Speaker 3 The water came out brown. And then

Speaker 2 I settled in for a shower. Everything was fine and kept the door closed.
We have a towel there.

Speaker 3 Did you buy shampoo?

Speaker 2 No. He just rinsed off.

Speaker 3 I bought body wash.

Speaker 2 Do you find the shower M ⁇ Ms I left for Eric?

Speaker 5 Yeah, I took him out while I was showering. I put him back after it dropped.

Speaker 3 Come on.

Speaker 6 I'm scared now.

Speaker 5 I just would have been so disturbed if I showed up at the office and Nick was just completely starkers in the bathroom.

Speaker 2 I went to the office twice that day. I could have very easily run into him in the shower.
That would have been the most confusing thing ever. The door has a lock, guys.

Speaker 3 It's It's not like I heard the door open, like, look at me.

Speaker 6 Yeah, but

Speaker 2 I randomly roam around the office as a robot. Like, if I saw you walk out with a towel, I would have been alarmed.

Speaker 4 That's crazy. Close into the bathroom.

Speaker 2 I knew you were there somewhere.

Speaker 5 I just feel like it would, if you hadn't have told me this story, I would have been so disturbed if I came into the office and I heard someone in the shower.

Speaker 5 I would have thought someone broke in to take a shower. I sure shit wouldn't have thought one of us was taking a shower there.

Speaker 3 It's insane.

Speaker 4 What do you mean?

Speaker 2 You took a shit the first day.

Speaker 2 Well, yeah.

Speaker 5 You got a shit. You got a shit at work.
You have to shower at work.

Speaker 2 I'm not mad that you took the shower. I just think it's wild that it happened that fast.
And also, I'm just kind of scared of that bathroom.

Speaker 2 Yeah, I couldn't figure out how to get hot water. It was very cold.
Oh, you just got to go into the kitchen and take a shower in the fucking kitchen sink.

Speaker 6 You just keep a basketball in your car?

Speaker 2 Yeah, I keep a basketball in my car, Andrew.

Speaker 4 We have the hottest milk coming out of the kitchen cell. You got to check it out.
It's awesome.

Speaker 5 The hottest milk?

Speaker 2 Has he said milk?

Speaker 4 Yeah. Have you guys not seen how white it turns like milk?

Speaker 3 It's awesome.

Speaker 2 It's weird.

Speaker 2 The water's already boiling when it comes out of the spigots.

Speaker 4 Oh, God.

Speaker 5 Could you get it so hot that it just comes out of steam?

Speaker 4 That would be crazy. That would have helped the gumpler.

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 3 Could have,

Speaker 3 yeah.

Speaker 5 We should put that out soon. I want to edit that one.

Speaker 2 Okay, edit it. Let's do it.

Speaker 6 Yeah, you're in the files.

Speaker 2 Yeah, nobody's stopping you.

Speaker 6 Yeah, you can just edit whenever you want.

Speaker 5 We're scheduled out quite far, is what I mean. Maybe we could.

Speaker 4 I don't. At this point in this recording, not really.
Not super far.

Speaker 2 I'm worried the gumpler will come out before this recording.

Speaker 3 Not worried. It might.
It could, though. It might.

Speaker 5 That'd be the goal.

Speaker 3 That's the goal.

Speaker 5 Yeah, why not?

Speaker 4 Jeff just said he was worried about it.

Speaker 3 But why?

Speaker 2 That's a good point. They've assuaged my concerns.
I'm no longer worried. Hey, problem solved, guys.

Speaker 2 That's teamwork for you.

Speaker 6 Would the Gumpler be an overseas edit for you?

Speaker 3 Oh.

Speaker 3 Gavin?

Speaker 5 I don't think I'm going to take anything.

Speaker 2 Okay. That's probably smart.
Become property of the U.S. government.

Speaker 2 Does anybody mind? now, but now that we're past all that, does anybody mind if I write their phone number in a port-a-potty and said, please text me pictures of your poops?

Speaker 4 Yeah, don't do, yeah, don't do that.

Speaker 5 What about this? I'll go back to the call sheet from 2007.

Speaker 5 I'll find that medic' number.

Speaker 3 Wow.

Speaker 2 Just text him.

Speaker 3 Text them some shits.

Speaker 5 You just have to get rid of the zero and put plus four four first.

Speaker 6 Can you imagine if that's how the wife found out that he was having an affair with somebody else's shits?

Speaker 3 Oh, God, dude.

Speaker 2 That is fucking funny. She's like, oh, is she sending you her shits too? Oh, my God, she is.

Speaker 5 Like, she recognized that it wasn't her own making?

Speaker 2 Yes. Yeah.

Speaker 2 Better just not to cheat, I guess.

Speaker 3 Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 2 Keep those shits to yourself.

Speaker 5 I feel like these podcasts have healed me. I felt pretty shitty at the beginning.

Speaker 3 You sound so much better.

Speaker 3 Better.

Speaker 2 What's your percentage at now? You were 70% earlier. Then you made it 75.

Speaker 5 Probably 80 now.

Speaker 2 Okay, so you're almost where you were when we were hanging out yesterday.

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 5 Maybe if we did a gameplay after this, I'd be fully healed.

Speaker 2 I mean, in the interest of healing you, I'm willing to give it a try.

Speaker 4 Okay, then we have to wrap this up, right?

Speaker 3 Shall we wrap up? Probably stop the podcast then.

Speaker 4 Yeah, yeah. Yeah, we got to start wrapping up, don't we?

Speaker 2 Yeah, but we're not stopping to go play a video game with Gavin. We're stopping because it's the natural conclusion of the podcast.
That's true. I feel like that's important to mention.

Speaker 2 This is where we all

Speaker 2 instinctively felt it was time to end. And

Speaker 5 I have a final suggestion. Okay.
A little pitch for the group. Oh, yeah.
No one will get back to me about getting squirrels out of my ceiling. What if we tackled it as a group?

Speaker 3 Glover. What?

Speaker 3 Okay.

Speaker 5 Get in the ceiling.

Speaker 2 I bet. Here's what we can do.
We'll treat them like bacon bits.

Speaker 2 We'll get my leaf blower up there. We'll try to blow him out.

Speaker 3 Can you put me up there?

Speaker 2 Can you bring me over as the robot and put me up there and I'll roam around for you?

Speaker 6 I'll chase him out. I'll scurry him.

Speaker 5 Now, I can't speak for the quality of the ceiling in there, but we'll try.

Speaker 2 Yeah. I love this idea.

Speaker 4 Put me in there.

Speaker 2 Also, do you guys think I should, you remember how when I layered all my peas together, it sounded like Niagara Falls?

Speaker 2 Oh, I can replay it for you if you'd like.

Speaker 3 I remember when you did things.

Speaker 2 Yeah, you remember when I did that? Somebody in the comments recently suggested that I do that with my

Speaker 2 shits and farts. Do you think I can make it sound like an atom bomb?

Speaker 4 Oh, I don't want you to do it. Please don't do it.
Thank you.

Speaker 5 It might sound like a track to starting.

Speaker 3 Oh, that's interesting.

Speaker 2 Well, maybe I'll play around with it.

Speaker 6 It sounds like you have material for when we do the Foley thing.

Speaker 2 I've got a very particular way I'd like to do my Foley work.

Speaker 2 And all right, that'll do it. Oh, you know what?

Speaker 2 We should watch. I was thinking this the other day, too.
We should all watch a trilogy together that none of us have ever ever seen before.

Speaker 2 Like, that might be hard to find a trilogy that none of us have seen any of, but we should watch it in reverse.

Speaker 5 So each one is a prequel?

Speaker 3 Yeah. yeah,

Speaker 2 because everybody always starts off and they're like, I like the trilogy, but the first one was the best, and then it just kind of went downhill or whatever.

Speaker 2 What if you watch it in reverse, you feel differently? You know, what if we think the third one is the best because it's the first one we watched? Or what if that's the case?

Speaker 2 What if the trilogy just gets better as we build?

Speaker 5 You know, could you imagine if someone had never seen the Matrix movies and watched them backwards? Oh, man. It'd be amazing.

Speaker 2 It'd be amazing. Or The Godfather or any of that stuff, right?

Speaker 3 Something to think about.

Speaker 2 We just have to identify what that trilogy is.

Speaker 5 I wonder if there is one that none of us have seen.

Speaker 2 I mean, there's probably a lot of foreign language trilogies that none of us have seen, but definitely.

Speaker 2 I'm going to get, you know, you know what? I've never seen any of the

Speaker 2 what are they like

Speaker 2 Air Force One, the one where Aaron Eckhart saves the president because his planes always crash.

Speaker 6 I've seen all this.

Speaker 2 Oh, I've never seen one.

Speaker 5 What about how many Riddick films are there?

Speaker 2 Seen them. I've seen a couple of them.

Speaker 4 Three of those, right?

Speaker 6 Yeah, I've seen them.

Speaker 5 How many Triple X films are there?

Speaker 6 Seen them. Three of those.
Seen them.

Speaker 6 Yeah.

Speaker 5 Yeah, it's going to be hard. I've got so many open trilogies, but we'll figure it out.

Speaker 4 I guess we'll have to watch Charmed first, and then we'll get to this.

Speaker 3 What's that?

Speaker 2 Wheel of Decades, motherfucker.

Speaker 3 Yep. Yep.

Speaker 2 All right. That'll probably do it for episode 58.
Thank you so much for listening. We really enjoyed spending the last hour and five minutes or so with you.

Speaker 2 We hope to see you right back here in this very spot next week for episode 59 of the Regulation Podcast. It's going to blow your dick off.

Speaker 3 Okay.

Speaker 4 Insane. Check out the Patreon.

Speaker 4 Hang on to your dicks. We'll see you next time.
Bye.

Speaker 3 Bye. Bye.