"Kevin Hart: LIVE in Los Angeles"

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Speaker 1 Who knew?

Speaker 2 Go to Walmart.com or download the app to get all your gifts this season.

Speaker 1 I'm going on the far side. Yep.
You're in the middle. No.

Speaker 1 You're in the middle. No, we go how we are.
You're in the middle, because it's your guest.

Speaker 3 Oh, and they're talking couches.

Speaker 1 Yes, yes.

Speaker 2 No, when we go out for the thing.

Speaker 1 What doesn't that? We just get messy.

Speaker 4 When we walk out.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I'm going to go far.

Speaker 3 I'm going to sit on the couch because it's my guess.

Speaker 1 Well, we can sit wherever you want.

Speaker 3 Except, don't sit on the couch. We just have to go.

Speaker 1 It doesn't matter.

Speaker 2 I've sat on the far side way too many times. Okay.

Speaker 1 Now I'm sitting on the far side now, and you're going to be sitting on the near side.

Speaker 2 By the way, I had a Thai iced tea, and it is not settling.

Speaker 3 But is the tea, is the caffeine giving you energy? Because I feel like I need a little bit of energy. You know, it worked out well for me in Boston.

Speaker 1 The slap worked.

Speaker 3 Now, I'm going to show you how hard I want you to slap me.

Speaker 1 Okay, don't, but don't. Okay.

Speaker 1 Wow. That hard.
That was for real. Let me lock my jaw.
Okay, here we go.

Speaker 4 I missed it entirely.

Speaker 1 Here we do it. One more time.

Speaker 1 Oh,

Speaker 1 okay, here we go. All right, here we go.
Here we go. Welcome here.
It is an all-new

Speaker 1 Smart Law.

Speaker 3 A half-a-standing ovation. It's the greatest.

Speaker 1 I know.

Speaker 1 Thank you, guys.

Speaker 1 Rob Needer. Meat sauce.

Speaker 3 Will's best friends get the best seat in the house.

Speaker 1 That's great. Robbie didn't pay a dollar.
This is a very LA crowd because we have the four best seats right here, just empty. Just empty.

Speaker 1 We're in Los Angeles!

Speaker 1 Yay!

Speaker 2 Thank you for coming.

Speaker 1 We we finally made it home.

Speaker 3 We made it home. We've been on the road.
Yeah, we've took we've taken this stupid ass, incredibly underwhelming night, yeah, you guys are about to see on the road for a week.

Speaker 3 And uh, we had a really, really good time.

Speaker 1 We want to keep setting the bar as low as possible for you all. So it's gonna be fun.

Speaker 1 Shall we sit? Let's sit. Yeah, let's sit.
Let's sit up. Let's sit.
All right.

Speaker 2 So I'm on this side. You're there.

Speaker 3 You're on that side.

Speaker 3 We did. Got applause for sitting.
Applause for sitting.

Speaker 1 We legit slapped each other backstage, and that was not rehearsed, and it actually hurt.

Speaker 3 Yeah, it put a little color in my face, though.

Speaker 1 It's your face completely.

Speaker 3 But, Sean, you got a heart out tonight, right? Because you got to get back to camp.

Speaker 1 Yeah, because you're dressed like a kid.

Speaker 3 He's got his whistle in his pocket.

Speaker 2 And the other one is giving a hype fight.

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 4 You look very, very cute.

Speaker 1 I look very cute.

Speaker 2 I look a little childlike, which is very scary for a 51-year-old. Yeah.

Speaker 1 No, you look, it looks like this looks like Sunday afternoon at your house. Well, it's

Speaker 1 closing.

Speaker 2 Oh, by the way, I'm chewing gum. I'm sorry.

Speaker 2 By the way, have you ever put gum in water and it flavors the water?

Speaker 1 Wow.

Speaker 6 But how do you guys feel?

Speaker 3 Are you guys tired from the tour?

Speaker 3 Are you pumped?

Speaker 2 Well, you guys give us energy.

Speaker 1 You do that, right?

Speaker 1 We legit can't believe that you guys listen to the podcast. That's the truth.

Speaker 3 That's really been a mind blower. So, first of all, thank you for doing that because all we're doing, as you can tell, we just talk to each other.
The fact that people

Speaker 3 are somewhat interested in listening to that is a mind-blower.

Speaker 3 We do feel like, since you can fast-forward all the crap parts or just go to a different episode when you're listening to the podcast, here you're trapped. So,

Speaker 3 we feel like we do have to juice juice it a little bit. So

Speaker 1 do you feel like people maybe double time, like double speed your questions?

Speaker 4 They have to.

Speaker 1 Because

Speaker 1 that's a great, yeah.

Speaker 1 That's a really, that's a really good smartless hack. So I'm going to give you guys a lot of smartless hacks.

Speaker 3 They did laugh and applaud like they know exactly what you're talking about. Yeah.

Speaker 2 I was trying to think of

Speaker 2 like a good LA story, like when I first moved here.

Speaker 1 Oh, settle in, everybody. Oh.

Speaker 3 Somebody's prepped a little bit.

Speaker 1 Oh, let's have it. I I was just before I started.
Does it involve the 101?

Speaker 2 Boy, traffic is

Speaker 1 hard.

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 3 Let's just single up a spot on Sean and he'll take front stage.

Speaker 2 No, I may have said this story before, but when I first moved here and I got Will and Grace, I went to a

Speaker 2 I didn't have two nickels rubbed together. I had no money.

Speaker 2 And the cast and the producers invited us out to a dinner. So I drove my Toy to Corolla, which had a hubcap missing and a window out with the, you know, with the plastic.

Speaker 1 Plastic? Yeah, plastic.

Speaker 3 And duct tape?

Speaker 2 Yes, absolutely, 100%. Come on.
I swear to God. And so I drove.

Speaker 1 Is that the car you drove from Chicago? Yes, yes, it is.

Speaker 2 Yes. And it broke down in Colorado.
And I paid some guy, I don't even know, money to fix it.

Speaker 1 And it was still broke down. A mechanic, hopefully.
I don't know.

Speaker 1 Just some guy on the road.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 2 I'm driving. I'm sorry.
So I get to the restaurant extra early because I'm so nervous about them seeing my car and I'm like, God, and I'm broke. And anyway, so I go.

Speaker 1 You're embarrassed about it.

Speaker 2 I was embarrassed about my car because it was like pieced together with Scotch tape. So

Speaker 2 I got there. I went in.
And then before the dinner was over, I kind of left early so that I could get my car from the valet and leave before they could see me. So I'm like, bye, everybody.

Speaker 2 Oh my God, I'm so excited. I come out to the valet and I'm standing there.
And then Jimmy Burroughs, Deborah, Megan, Eric, the producers, a couple of writers, and now we're all standing there.

Speaker 2 I'm like, oh, my God. And so he pulls the car up, and I was like, and it's like, you know, barely getting there.

Speaker 1 The last subcamp rolls off. Right.

Speaker 2 And I said to everybody, I said at the ballet, go, what did you do to my car?

Speaker 2 Oh, my God.

Speaker 1 First of all, it was a Porsche. No, it's not a Porsche anymore.

Speaker 3 Now, ironically, you did end up getting a Porsche when the show performed.

Speaker 1 And you gave everybody a Porsche on the show, right?

Speaker 2 Right, Right, which is also embarrassing, but I also didn't have money when they gave me a Porsche, so I'm like, give me the fucking money. What do I need another car for?

Speaker 2 But it was very, very kind of them.

Speaker 2 But when you're a struggling actor and you.

Speaker 1 So you sold it, right?

Speaker 2 Absolutely right away.

Speaker 3 I had to pay my rent.

Speaker 1 I had to pay my rent. Relax.
It was a boxer. But the point is.

Speaker 1 It's true.

Speaker 1 Wait, did you drive it or did you see it? No, I just, I read the details on that story years ago. And that always stuck with me.

Speaker 1 I was like, oh, they gave them Porsches. Oh, Oh, did they? Yeah.

Speaker 1 I know it seems snobby, but it's, you know, it's kind of true. Yeah.

Speaker 4 So that's major. What about your first time out here?

Speaker 1 Do you remember? Yeah, I was talking about it today.

Speaker 1 I drove out here as well. I drove, I had an old.
Did they not have planes back then?

Speaker 1 No. That was so funny.

Speaker 3 And from Toronto, you couldn't have a longer drive.

Speaker 1 No, no, no, I drove from New York because I was living in New York.

Speaker 2 Oh, New York is much closer.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so it's much.

Speaker 1 In fact, it's further away. It is.
That's true. But yeah, I drove.
I had this old Volvo station wagon, and we drove out here. I don't know why.
We made a trip.

Speaker 3 I love a Volvo station wagon. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Right? Oh.

Speaker 1 It was a real piece of shit, and

Speaker 1 it had rusted through on the bottom, and you could see the road underneath. Like

Speaker 1 Fred Friedlandstone. Yeah, like Fred Flintstone.
It was that bad, but it was a ton of fun. And then I drove back.
I ended up driving back to New York a couple months later.

Speaker 2 Same car.

Speaker 1 Same Same car in like 40 hours straight.

Speaker 2 And that's the way to do it. You like to stop is like, no, you bleary-eyed, you got to keep going.

Speaker 1 No, and then I had somebody else with me, and I would sleep in the back, and he would drive. And then we would sleep.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 2 And my car was packed to the end, and I would get into the passenger seat, and I would go down in the bucket and I would sleep on the thing because there was no room. There was no room.

Speaker 1 Show us how you sleep again, real quick. Sure.
Just like this.

Speaker 3 What?

Speaker 1 Hang on.

Speaker 3 Wait, you sleep more comfortably in a car if you get down into the footwell?

Speaker 1 Yes. Yes, because

Speaker 1 you can't sleep like, you know, sure you can.

Speaker 2 I'm not a cow.

Speaker 3 How do you do it on a plane, guy?

Speaker 1 I go back, dude.

Speaker 3 You don't get on the floor on the plane?

Speaker 1 That would be so great if you got on the floor on a plane.

Speaker 3 I mean,

Speaker 3 it's not Justin Thoreau eccentric on a plane. Did you guys hear this story of the podcast? We gotta do it for a sec.

Speaker 1 To those who have it. Oh, they already know it.
They already know it.

Speaker 3 They already know it, you know?

Speaker 1 Yeah, but let's embarrass him further. I mean, no.

Speaker 1 No, no, no.

Speaker 3 No, he deserves to be embarrassed about this. Justin Thoreau can't sleep with a shirt on, right? I mean, I'm sure a lot of people, I'm sure a lot of people sleep without their shirt on, right?

Speaker 1 And he can't sleep without a shirt on, and he also can't sleep without doing crunches before he goes to sleep.

Speaker 2 Right, I don't know this story. I don't know.

Speaker 3 So we're flying to

Speaker 3 England I think or something. So he's going to be topless for quite a stretch.

Speaker 3 And he's all tatted up and he's up front and everything. People are wearing ties and stuff and he just pops his shirt off.

Speaker 3 He does a perfunctory cover with the little tiny blanket or whatever. But five minutes into that, that's gone.
And it's just some tatted up freak who looks like Iggy Pop just passed out into front.

Speaker 1 It's like... Wait, really? I'm afraid.

Speaker 2 I need to wipe everything down. I could never sleep with my shirt off.

Speaker 1 Disgusting. That's what I'm saying.

Speaker 1 He's got a layer to protect him from the germs. He's got a layer of spray tan that actually

Speaker 5 keeps the germs.

Speaker 3 But you will get down in the floor well of a car and sleep.

Speaker 1 Those germs are okay.

Speaker 2 Absolutely. At 24 years old, yeah.

Speaker 3 Oh, my God.

Speaker 1 All right,

Speaker 3 let's get a guest out here.

Speaker 1 All right, let's get a guest out here.

Speaker 1 It's Jason's guest, so we don't know who's. And by the way, just in case people don't know, and we say it all the time, we legitimately don't know who the other person's guests are.

Speaker 1 So we've had to jump through a lot of hoops on this tour to not cross paths with the guests.

Speaker 2 Yeah, we had a great one. Never mind.
Okay, go ahead.

Speaker 1 No, Jason, it's okay.

Speaker 3 But I have not learned my lesson because when's the last time you guys met a real bullfighter?

Speaker 1 No, I'm kidding. I'm kidding.

Speaker 1 By the way,

Speaker 1 could you?

Speaker 2 I would love that.

Speaker 1 I would love that. I would love it too.

Speaker 2 I would have a thousand questions about this.

Speaker 1 I would love it too if we were going to cover the vampires.

Speaker 3 So we're backstage. You'd love it.
Here we come. Our guest tonight is a force, a comedic fire hose.

Speaker 3 Right, that's a good start, right?

Speaker 1 Not a bullfighter. Very, no, very good.

Speaker 3 This man can't be contained. His energy and positivity is infectious, y'all.
Philadelphia couldn't hold him. New York seasoned him.

Speaker 3 And now, lucky for us, he's planted out here in LA, pumping out project after project for all of us to gobble up. He's done tons of movies, TV shows, released multiple comedy albums and specials.

Speaker 3 He's got 45 nominations from everything from Emmys to Grammys. He's got a freaking video game, I think.

Speaker 3 Somehow, though, he's been nice enough to pull it over to the side, give us a little time for chat and giggle here on the spotless couch. Gang, buckle up.
It's the one and only Kevin Hart.

Speaker 1 Man, I can't wait. He owes me a movie.

Speaker 1 Hello, hello, hello. Kevin Hart!

Speaker 1 It's so

Speaker 1 check. Am I on? By the way.

Speaker 3 You know what that is? That's redemption.

Speaker 1 That is redemption. That is redemption.
That is an over-deliver. And I overdeliver.

Speaker 3 Check, check.

Speaker 6 Can you hear me? Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we got you.

Speaker 3 We got you.

Speaker 1 All right. Wait.
Well,

Speaker 1 before you...

Speaker 1 What I...

Speaker 6 I just want you... I want you guys to lower your expectations because I've been drinking.

Speaker 1 Sequillin.

Speaker 1 Just lower them. Lower them down.
That's fair. Fair warning.
Sequel him. Whoa, wow.
Is it really? Good for you.

Speaker 1 That smells pretty good. Super Bowl Week.
Super Bowl Weegan. Smells real good.

Speaker 3 Super Bowl Weegan. And then behind there is just a chest full of weed, right?

Speaker 1 Some shit. Some shit in here.
Good for you.

Speaker 1 We're not paying him for this. He's behind the ones.

Speaker 1 Here we go. No, he's not.
Just for the chasm.

Speaker 6 What's your fucking problem?

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 3 His fourth gig today.

Speaker 1 He's in the bag.

Speaker 1 Sean's in charge of blocking. Yeah, he's just...
He really just... Wait.

Speaker 6 You really just pushed me back. Get the fuck back, Tom.

Speaker 1 All right.

Speaker 2 By the way, I'm such a huge fan. You've been on my list to come on as well, but I can't believe Jason Abjap.
I'm a massive.

Speaker 3 Did he turn you down?

Speaker 1 He said, okay, absolutely.

Speaker 6 I'm a big fan. I'm a big fan of.

Speaker 1 You know what?

Speaker 1 He doesn't tell you what.

Speaker 3 I bum rushed Kevin when we were doing, we did different stroke. Oh, no, not different.

Speaker 1 You were doing different strokes. I was different strokes.

Speaker 3 Oh, that's right.

Speaker 3 Our buddy Jimmy Kimmel does this.

Speaker 6 Whatever the hell it is.

Speaker 6 You don't know what he does we did it he does a he does a pretty handsome talk show but he did it we do redos of episodes of uh sitcoms we did facts of life you played arnold on different strokes it was so killed it yes and so i so i i i cornered him and you really didn't have a chance to say no i apologize no you didn't you didn't corner me look you're you're in a group of guys that don't ask for shit i feel like there's a certain amount of people in our business that don't ask that when they do ask it's like yeah i'll do it because they don't ask so those people that don't ask normally have something that's good when they do ask.

Speaker 6 So, Bateman asked,

Speaker 6 and I'll be honest, I'll be honest, and this is only for you guys. I thought it was Ozark.
I thought I was,

Speaker 6 I did, I swear to God,

Speaker 6 I swear to God, I thought it was a scene in Ozark.

Speaker 6 And

Speaker 1 I found out,

Speaker 1 you know, what we can do is we can make the light blue if you like. No, no, it's okay.

Speaker 6 I just found out just now this isn't Ozark.

Speaker 1 When it was alive.

Speaker 3 It would be a very special dream season.

Speaker 1 Let's call him Marty for the rest.

Speaker 1 Let's just keep calling him Marty.

Speaker 3 Payback is going to be tough, isn't it? What are you going to ask me to do?

Speaker 6 I don't know. Jason, here's the weird thing, man.

Speaker 1 You don't want me to do anything.

Speaker 6 You're one of those guys that's talented, but then you're like, eh, like, you know, what do you...

Speaker 6 It's like, what do you...

Speaker 6 What do you really want from him? All right. No, on a serious note, Jason Bateman to me is Hollywood royalty.

Speaker 1 Let him finish.

Speaker 2 By the way. Yes, I agree.

Speaker 1 By the way, here's what I mean when I say that.

Speaker 6 Hollywood royalty

Speaker 6 definition will fall in this category too. Sean.

Speaker 6 Well, I don't.

Speaker 6 Sean, I'm not sure what you.

Speaker 1 Should it have pushed him, Sean? I know. You should have pushed him.

Speaker 6 Sean, if you didn't push me, I would have done my research.

Speaker 1 But, all right.

Speaker 6 Hollywood royalty to me is people that work consistently, consistently without

Speaker 6 an agenda, people that do what they want and have a good time in doing royalty.

Speaker 1 Royalty. That's fucking good.
So you're royalty.

Speaker 6 Yes, but I'm saying like that's that's why I respect that. So thank you.

Speaker 1 Congratulations, you guys. Thank you.

Speaker 1 Hey,

Speaker 1 hey, he got you got nominated for interviewer of the year. That should be good enough.
Right?

Speaker 2 Wait, no, you guys. You guys, wait, you guys, you guys are the royalty, and I'm the jester.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 3 You are the best camp counselor out of all four of us.

Speaker 6 So he's not the guy responsible for blocking? No.

Speaker 1 Cheers. Tonight.
No, it's not. All right.
Well, pound to you, buddy.

Speaker 6 I know what you do now. Fuck yeah.

Speaker 1 Dude, right.

Speaker 1 All right.

Speaker 3 Now, so this is very foreign to us, but you have spent a lot of time in front of audiences doing stand-up, doing specials.

Speaker 3 You played in front of 55,000 people in Philadelphia for all of you.

Speaker 6 I was telling you guys, this is intimate.

Speaker 1 This is nice.

Speaker 6 It's a very nice, intimate crowd, man. This is what it's about.
It's about connecting with the people.

Speaker 2 Here's what blows my mind. By the way, I'm a huge Shark Tank fan, and I saw you on Shark Tank, and I was blown away.

Speaker 1 Thank you, man.

Speaker 2 Like, I had no idea. I mean, I knew you had.

Speaker 1 Because I'm black.

Speaker 6 What the fuck are you saying?

Speaker 6 What are you saying?

Speaker 1 Yeah, so what were you on Shark Tank for?

Speaker 3 Were you pitching something or judging?

Speaker 6 No, no. What the fuck is that buffer?

Speaker 4 I've not seen the show.

Speaker 1 No, but I am a picture of the picture.

Speaker 1 I understand? He was a shark. He was shark.

Speaker 3 So you weren't pitching like, I got an idea?

Speaker 1 I don't. No, no, no.
No, Jay.

Speaker 2 He was like Mark Cuban, but a guest.

Speaker 1 Okay. Well, hang on.
Kevin Hart, bitch.

Speaker 1 What do you mean?

Speaker 1 Am I pitching the idea?

Speaker 3 But hang on. If I've got some great idea for the new Swifter or something, I don't want to fund that.
I want Mark Cuban to fund that. So I'm going to go on the show.
I'm going to pitch him.

Speaker 3 Regardless of what I got in the bank,

Speaker 6 he's got more that's stupid because you can just call Mark Cuban.

Speaker 1 Yeah, if you go

Speaker 1 If you go on national television If you go on national television

Speaker 2 But I always knew you were you had all these things going on, but I just didn't know at that extent.

Speaker 2 I mean you have this huge successful company that makes all of these projects and these things come to life. I just had no idea.
And on top of that, you invest in tons of things.

Speaker 2 Some of them I do too. So we're kind of matched up.

Speaker 6 It's a secret to the

Speaker 6 success, but I think

Speaker 6 building up a platform and infrastructure with people that are so talented, so amazing to help me execute things that I have a vision for have become my priority in the business.

Speaker 3 And also identifying people maybe that might need a little help for access, and you kind of grandfather that maybe a little bit. You bring people into your company.

Speaker 6 I do. I really do.
I think it's no longer about me. It's not about my star.
It's not about where I am. It's now about helping others.
And

Speaker 6 the real benefit is true.

Speaker 1 Yeah. It's true.

Speaker 1 It's why I do this podcast to help these guys out.

Speaker 1 Good for you.

Speaker 6 Good for you, Will.

Speaker 3 Now, with all of that work, though, are you good about taking breaks, whether it be at home or like fun vacations? What's your

Speaker 6 break? I'm taking a break now because I said I don't want to do something good, right? Let me come.

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 And like. As a compliment,

Speaker 1 I think it's a compliment.

Speaker 6 Just get it. No, I'm joking.

Speaker 6 On some real shit. Like,

Speaker 6 I have a tough time doing that. I have a tough time taking breaks.
I have a tough time really taking time to myself. And that's what I'm working on.

Speaker 6 So, if I had to say a flaw, a flaw is realizing that I need downtime.

Speaker 1 Like, just to take your foot off the gas a little bit.

Speaker 1 And so, Kevin, we first met over 20 years ago.

Speaker 1 You were a stand-up. What? It's the truth.
It's true. It's a bad apology to make.
It It was true.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 1 you were a stand-up,

Speaker 1 but you were just breaking through. Like, obviously, you didn't have the success that you have now.

Speaker 1 Walk us through a little bit those first, because I remember those first couple years, you did that pilot with a bunch of our friends,

Speaker 1 and then that pilot didn't get picked up, and then you seemed like you did a pilot every year. You'd always be at the upfronts, which is where they sell the ads for new shows.
For Tracy, yeah.

Speaker 1 You were always like, yeah, for Tracy. By the way, we had Tracy.
You had Tracy? Sean's sister

Speaker 1 we went to Wisconsin and she came on stage and it was fucking front row of t-shirts that said I know Tracy

Speaker 3 but anyway by the way didn't look half as dumb as Sean makes her sound like what are you doing she was kind of more with it than you dude yeah

Speaker 1 I get it

Speaker 5 and we will be right back

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Speaker 7 first of all, they just made our set look really good. They made us really comfortable, and they kind of made us look legit because otherwise it would have been, you know, milk crates and,

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Speaker 2 And now back to the show.

Speaker 1 Kevin, like you, what was that? What was that like those first, I don't know, 10 years? Because you were just, you never stopped working and trying and doing shit and like going after it.

Speaker 6 I'll summarize it. I'll summarize it so that it doesn't take too long.

Speaker 6 Because we have got to go. Well, I know.
I know, Sean. I want to get you.
I don't want to hold you up too long. You know, everybody asks about the ambition of a guy that comes from nothing.

Speaker 6 And what you got to understand is if you come from nothing, then nothing is exactly that. So anything that adds up to something is a benefit.

Speaker 6 So when you keep getting a little bit of something, your ambition grows.

Speaker 6 When I got a little piece of Hollywood and I got a little piece of success and a little piece of success was actually getting a flight landing and the room being there for me that's a piece I kept adding those pieces together and what you realize is that oh god it's so much better than what I had and if it ultimately goes back to where I was well I was already there there is no loss I think about that all the time you already know what the result is from growing up so why not try something and fail and learn from it because the the fallback is already familiar to you it's you're 1000% correct

Speaker 1 I kind of just repeated what you said.

Speaker 6 Well, you did.

Speaker 6 You actually did.

Speaker 3 They do it to me all the time. They cut what I say from five minutes down to about 30 seconds.

Speaker 1 It's how it's

Speaker 1 a compliment forwarding.

Speaker 6 Take it as a compliment. But for Will, you know me.
You saw the real younger me. And when you talk about that environment that we were in,

Speaker 6 I mean, I was a kid. I was a kid and I knew nothing at all.
So you guys honestly acted as examples of what to do, what not to do, where to go, where not to go within that world of early entertainment.

Speaker 1 I got this great, we talked about it when I saw you back in December.

Speaker 1 I've got this great photo that's now at my house of like Kevin, Seth Rogan, me, Amy, my ex-January Jones, Jason Siegel, Nick Stoller, Judd Appetow.

Speaker 1 January 2001, we were just hanging out because we had nowhere else to be.

Speaker 6 Hanging out.

Speaker 1 And it was so crazy.

Speaker 6 Hanging out. And guess who I was?

Speaker 1 Guess. No.
Guess. I'm not going to do it.
Take a guess.

Speaker 3 You're not going to get me canceled tonight.

Speaker 1 Say it. Say it.

Speaker 1 I'm going to make it one more day.

Speaker 3 I've got questions I've gone over here that are

Speaker 6 canceled proof.

Speaker 1 All right. You passed that test.

Speaker 1 All right.

Speaker 1 And I guess you're the black one. There you go.

Speaker 1 Yes. Yes.

Speaker 6 By the way, you're done, buddy.

Speaker 1 You're done. That's right.

Speaker 3 Now,

Speaker 3 do your kids recognize and appreciate how hard you work?

Speaker 3 Do they give it up?

Speaker 3 Or are they just like

Speaker 3 dad?

Speaker 3 Do they have notes on your phone?

Speaker 1 My kids don't give a fuck about me, man.

Speaker 6 My kids are the best kids with no knowledge of, my kids truly, and this is said humbly, my kids have no idea how successful I am.

Speaker 6 They don't get it.

Speaker 6 I'm dad. I've seen my kids cry over some people, and it's really made me angry like yeah, yeah, they've met YouTube stars or TikTokers full tears.

Speaker 1 Oh my God.

Speaker 6 Oh my god dad, do you know who that is off of TikTok?

Speaker 1 And I was like TikTok?

Speaker 1 Like

Speaker 1 punch to the ribs.

Speaker 3 Well, what happens like you're driving down the street and you're driving by a big billboard with your with your kids?

Speaker 6 They don't care.

Speaker 1 It doesn't look like they don't care.

Speaker 3 They say dad, you could take a better picture than that?

Speaker 6 No, they, my kids are, I make sure that my kids are grounded and understanding that that's my job. Yeah, so when I'm working, my kids come to my job.
I make my kids work on my job. My kids act as PAs.

Speaker 6 They act as set assistants. They act as DA assistants or

Speaker 6 like lower, lower end craft services. So I make them work.

Speaker 1 My kids are here tonight. Get me some coffee, would you?

Speaker 1 I make them work.

Speaker 3 Are they with the exposure to the business and all that stuff? Are they finding stuff on set that they're really interested in? Do they have the bug? Do they want to be a bad person?

Speaker 6 My daughter has the bug. She definitely wants wants to, but I'm an advocate of be a kid, finish being a kid, and then let's pursue the adult dream.

Speaker 6 And that's not to say that that's for everybody, that's for me and my household. And my daughter loves that idea.

Speaker 6 And, you know, because of what we've agreed to, when she's done with school, you get the full support and backing of what you took the time to learn.

Speaker 6 I don't want to embed them in something at a young age and prohibit them from getting the full extent of that life, like as a child, especially where we are, where we live.

Speaker 6 It's not the same as when I came up.

Speaker 6 So they understand that. And I think my daughter wants to do it bad.
My daughter wants to be.

Speaker 6 She wants to act? She wants to act. My daughter wants to act bad.
How old is she? My daughter's 16. Oh, great.
16 years old.

Speaker 1 Son wants to act too. Do you?

Speaker 1 Do you?

Speaker 6 Good for you. It's going to happen.
It's going to happen. It's going to be tough after this canceling because you got one coming.

Speaker 1 You got to get back up.

Speaker 6 You think I forgot about that break?

Speaker 1 I hope that Toyota still works.

Speaker 6 My son wants to be a stunt man. Really?

Speaker 1 That's weird.

Speaker 1 He wants to be a stunt man.

Speaker 3 Okay, now I hear that, and I immediately think that he's got like, he's strapped like you, that he's like got snakes under his shirt, just like you. Are you guys working out together?

Speaker 6 Yeah, no, he doesn't have that.

Speaker 6 So I want to tell you that you're wrong with that assessment.

Speaker 3 So, like, what, what's, what's,

Speaker 3 not to be creepy, but if you took all your clothes off right now, we're looking at a, are we looking at

Speaker 1 again,

Speaker 1 again, not

Speaker 1 to be creepy, right? Not to be creepy, yeah, right.

Speaker 3 Are we talking? You're like, you're basically in bodybuilder shape. Have done for a lot.

Speaker 3 That's admirable. That takes a lot of discipline.
You got a great routine, I'm assuming.

Speaker 1 Yep, yeah, yep.

Speaker 6 Here's the thing, man. It's all about the walk away to the bathroom, right? Like, if you're, if you're married,

Speaker 6 every morning you get up and you go to the bathroom, sometimes naked, sometimes with a shirt on, sometimes it's not. But that bathroom walkaway is always viewed by your partner.
And in my mind.

Speaker 1 You're working out a lot

Speaker 3 on the back of yourself.

Speaker 6 I'm working on just in general.

Speaker 3 It's all calves, buttocks, and lights.

Speaker 6 Calves, buttocks, back, black.

Speaker 1 Let them finish, man.

Speaker 6 You want to know where the fuck your life hung? If you walk to the bathroom and you hear subtly, ugh.

Speaker 6 It will destroy you. So in the back of my mind,

Speaker 1 I don't ever want to hear that.

Speaker 6 So when I walk away, I tiptoe and I make sure that I don't hear my wife go,

Speaker 6 that means that she's no longer happy with that. So, it's all about keeping it in shape.
When I walk away, I need you to know that's what you just fucked. Like, that's that's

Speaker 1 that's my

Speaker 1 okay, yeah, that's my takeaway.

Speaker 3 So, now again, I'm just doing the math here.

Speaker 1 So,

Speaker 3 if you're walking away from, she's looking at your rear, and she's saying, I just fucked that.

Speaker 1 Take that in.

Speaker 3 I'm just doing the math.

Speaker 6 Wait a minute.

Speaker 1 Hold on. Exactly.
Yeah. Let's go back.

Speaker 6 Still rolling. Let me switch it out.

Speaker 2 My husband understands that.

Speaker 1 Good luck.

Speaker 1 Good luck.

Speaker 1 Oh, shit.

Speaker 1 All right. Oh.

Speaker 1 I love a canceled checkmate. All right.

Speaker 6 By the way.

Speaker 6 He's off the

Speaker 6 he's no longer on the cancel meter.

Speaker 1 As black people, we've given him a pass. Congratulations.
All right.

Speaker 1 Now,

Speaker 3 we've stumbled into a little bit of a segue to,

Speaker 2 I want,

Speaker 3 I want to ask about this nickname, Chocolate Dropper.

Speaker 1 Yes.

Speaker 3 There's a little bit of a segue to that.

Speaker 6 I don't understand how Sean's sex life is.

Speaker 1 No, no, no, no, no.

Speaker 3 You walking away.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 2 By the way, the walking away thing I love because you don't ever look behind you.

Speaker 1 You just walk away from you. You just got to walk away.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you don't have to look. You don't have to be like, like, if you ever look back, that's a sign of insecurity.
That's right.

Speaker 6 Yeah, you don't want to look back.

Speaker 1 How do you feel, Jason? How do you feel about Amanda's view when you walk? He looks back all the time.

Speaker 1 You're checking.

Speaker 1 Do you walk backwards out?

Speaker 3 My move's a little bit more of a moonwalk to the bathroom.

Speaker 1 But do you?

Speaker 1 Do you walk backwards, just t-shirt, and then your shirt cocking?

Speaker 6 I don't think Jason wears draws. I think it's just a t-shirt,

Speaker 1 kicking ass out. And it's just

Speaker 1 That's how I picture it, too.

Speaker 3 This body showers with a t-shirt on.

Speaker 6 Winnie the Pooh. Yeah, yeah.
Winnie the Pooh is what I picture you as.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Just like in his hat and the honey.

Speaker 1 But it's good, that's called shirt cocking. When you're just a t-shirt and then the sh-cocking.

Speaker 2 Wait, do you all, does anybody sleep naked?

Speaker 1 Do you sleep naked? I'm a naked sleeper. Yeah.
Do you? Yeah. Yeah.
Fuck yeah. Really?

Speaker 6 Would you keep all this in clothes?

Speaker 1 Hell no.

Speaker 3 Are we looking at your sleep outfit right now?

Speaker 1 Absolutely.

Speaker 1 100%.

Speaker 2 Absolutely. I'm going night and night in between shows in this.

Speaker 1 By the way, do us a favor. Don't say night night.
What do you,

Speaker 1 Sean, what do you wear?

Speaker 2 Always the same thing. I wear shorts and a long sleeve, like loose shirt because Scotty leaves the air conditioning on it like, you know, 20 below.
Okay. And

Speaker 1 what kind of shorts? What? Shorts, though. I know.
Yeah. I know.

Speaker 2 Yeah, because if you wear sweat,

Speaker 2 when the air conditioning's on and you you wear sweats and then the comforter, it's too hot. So I wear shorts with one leg and one leg out,

Speaker 2 and then a long sleeve so you don't have to have the cover on you. It acts as the cover.

Speaker 3 Is the one leg out to balance the spinning?

Speaker 2 Absolutely.

Speaker 6 What kind of shorts? Are we talking like a thick short?

Speaker 2 We got like a flannel short just because to really maximize. Don't look at me like that.

Speaker 6 What do you mean?

Speaker 6 What do you mean? In the one area where your ass needs to be clean, you sweating it out.

Speaker 1 You gotta

Speaker 1 flannel short.

Speaker 2 It's too cold to sweat anywhere.

Speaker 1 Bullshit.

Speaker 6 that's a flannel short under a fucking duvet with a cover you stink well you

Speaker 1 know what

Speaker 1 no you stain your sheets sleeping naked by the way

Speaker 1 by the way

Speaker 1 good point which is why we go black black sheets I thought about that storm.

Speaker 5 I thought about that.

Speaker 1 You just got recanceled, Sean.

Speaker 1 Re-cancelled.

Speaker 4 I'm back on top.

Speaker 2 Anybody who sleeps naked, you're staining staining your sheets from getting up in the middle of the night and going, pee, that's things that only

Speaker 1 don't shout out.

Speaker 2 There's a couple drops there, so you're gonna have to change your sheets more often.

Speaker 1 Next question: Chocolate. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

Speaker 1 Who's staining your sheets?

Speaker 1 I'm saying

Speaker 1 blood. No, no.

Speaker 1 No, no, no, no, no. He's talking urine.
Whose dick is still dripping when they catch it in bed?

Speaker 1 What are you doing? You don't shake it off enough. Oh, my God.
You don't have to worry about that because I wear shorts.

Speaker 1 So, wait, Kevin, I don't know if you know this. JIC! JIC, just in case.
Jason, back in the day, he would do this thing for a while where he wasn't wearing underwear.

Speaker 1 When we were years ago shooting arrested development, this is...

Speaker 1 I think we've told this.

Speaker 4 I went through a three-

Speaker 3 I went through a three.

Speaker 3 I had a three-year window where I went commando for some weird reason.

Speaker 1 So it happened.

Speaker 3 It happened.

Speaker 1 It's not that great.

Speaker 3 That's right.

Speaker 3 And it happened to be while I was working on a show where I wore nothing but khaki pants.

Speaker 1 So he would go to the bathroom, and then what he would do is he's worried about drippage. Oh, God.
So, so

Speaker 3 you go to go to the bathroom. Well, we're ready to shoot, but I'm peeing, and so the cameras are going to be rolling in a pencil.

Speaker 1 So guess what?

Speaker 6 I asked before I came here, I said this is going to be some white boy shit that said no.

Speaker 1 I asked.

Speaker 1 Wait. I fucking asked.

Speaker 1 I asked. So he goes, so one day, one day we're on set,

Speaker 1 and Jason goes up by one of those, one of the huge garbage cans, and he's standing there, and he takes paper, like toilet paper, out of his pants. He goes, what are you doing?

Speaker 1 He goes, I got to put it in there to blot it for like 20 minutes. I got to wrap it.
He wraps it.

Speaker 1 And then he takes it out in the middle of the set. I'm like, what the fuck are you talking?

Speaker 1 That's what serial killers do.

Speaker 6 I want to ask an honest question.

Speaker 6 I want to ask the honest question because I understand the world of producing. I'm going to get back to your original question.
So you got an edit point.

Speaker 1 But

Speaker 6 before I get to it,

Speaker 6 before I get there,

Speaker 6 is there ever a good reaction from the guy that doesn't wear draws?

Speaker 6 The man that doesn't wear underwear, he pulls out an underwear. Has a woman ever said, oh,

Speaker 1 I know.

Speaker 1 No underwear.

Speaker 6 What do you think that did?

Speaker 3 I don't remember what prompted.

Speaker 6 How lazy are you?

Speaker 1 Like,

Speaker 1 to note. By the way, it's horrible.

Speaker 3 It's horrible wearing no underwear.

Speaker 3 It's horrible wearing boxers. I think boxers, like, they don't bend, they don't stretch.

Speaker 3 So

Speaker 3 I found boxer briefs.

Speaker 1 Have you guys heard about these boxers? Yes. I don't know.
Fantastic.

Speaker 3 They're incredible.

Speaker 1 Now,

Speaker 3 what do you, you say you sleep naked? Yeah. And you got the onesie.

Speaker 1 Yes. Right?

Speaker 3 You're naked.

Speaker 1 Butt ball.

Speaker 1 Butt ball naked. Butt ball.

Speaker 3 How do you, how do you, we're going to wrap up all this crap talk, but

Speaker 6 I gave you a cup.

Speaker 3 Do you, do you pee sitting down?

Speaker 6 I almost punched you in the fucking face just then.

Speaker 1 I did.

Speaker 3 You pee sitting down, right?

Speaker 3 You're not, see, you're not old enough yet.

Speaker 3 How old are you?

Speaker 1 I'm 42.

Speaker 3 Okay, you're not old enough yet.

Speaker 3 You pee sitting down, right?

Speaker 1 Wait,

Speaker 1 Will, you better not. I don't.

Speaker 6 You stutter. You fucking stuttered.

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 1 You stuttered. You pee sitting down.
I've been through this with you.

Speaker 2 I've been sitting down for years because I think it's rude when somebody comes over to your house, like guys come over your house or whatever, and they pee and it splashes and they don't clean it up.

Speaker 2 So, you know what, guys? Just sit down. It takes care of all the splashing.

Speaker 1 There he is. Uh-oh.

Speaker 3 And it stretches out your back.

Speaker 3 Your back's going to start getting tight on you at about 50.

Speaker 6 Sean, did you just say?

Speaker 6 No. I just want to make sure I heard it.

Speaker 6 You misheard me. No, I fucking heard you.

Speaker 1 I fucking hurt you.

Speaker 6 You just said so it doesn't splash all around. Yeah, you can sit down.

Speaker 2 Because a lot of guys are like, I don't fucking care. And then it's just like, and then they walk away.

Speaker 2 So, you know, whoever comes over to my house, I always say, hey, please be neat and wipe the seat.

Speaker 3 Wait, is there a sign? Do you have a sign?

Speaker 2 No, but that's a good idea.

Speaker 4 All right, come on. All right.

Speaker 3 So, all right, we're out of the bathroom. We're out of the bedroom.
Hang on. All right, let's get out of the bathroom, out of the bedroom.
Let's get to the shoe store. Shoe salesman,

Speaker 3 take me to the shoe salesman days.

Speaker 1 Oh, back on. Now I'm really

Speaker 1 going to get my dust kicked now. Traumatized.

Speaker 6 Traumatized because he said. Wait, what about...

Speaker 6 I'll let it go. I'll let it fucking go, but I don't like you saying that we're all nasty and pee on the seat.
I've never peed on the fucking seat.

Speaker 1 He's got good answers. I'm not saying all of them.
He's got better answers.

Speaker 6 It was very racist what he said. He suggested to black people.

Speaker 6 Whatever. All right, let's go.
So,

Speaker 3 Will's had some interesting jobs. Sean's had some interesting jobs.
I hear

Speaker 3 shoe salesman is in your quiver.

Speaker 6 Shoe salesman is definitely what I was, who I used to be. How long?

Speaker 1 I was a

Speaker 6 shoe salesman for probably two years. Yeah.
I'm very good.

Speaker 1 What were we doing?

Speaker 3 Were we selling sneakers? Are we selling dress shoes?

Speaker 6 I sold everything, Jason.

Speaker 2 Did that experience make you in

Speaker 2 all your tentacles in your business want to do something with shoes?

Speaker 1 What I want you to understand is that. Oh, wait a second.
What was that question?

Speaker 6 Did you say tentacles? What?

Speaker 1 No, like,

Speaker 2 with all your businesses going on,

Speaker 2 you may already have this.

Speaker 1 You're on thin fucking ice, Sean.

Speaker 1 It's going to be tonight.

Speaker 2 It's going to be, dear diary. Kevin Hart scares the shit out of me.

Speaker 1 No, do you want to know? No,

Speaker 3 if he's got a desire to do that.

Speaker 6 No, no, but I got tentacles. What did you say now?

Speaker 2 I meant like all your business tentacles, all the businesses that you have going.

Speaker 2 Did your experience being a shoe salesman

Speaker 2 want to start your own line of shoes?

Speaker 1 Oh, so you

Speaker 1 get sandy.

Speaker 6 You want to know if all my success within business and endeavors, at some point, if I was like, this should be shoes.

Speaker 1 He's going to beat your ass. Yeah,

Speaker 2 like Kevin Hart shoes.

Speaker 6 Yeah, got it.

Speaker 2 That you can pee on. Got it.

Speaker 6 Got it.

Speaker 3 Maybe they're rubber boots.

Speaker 1 By it.

Speaker 1 By the way. By the way.

Speaker 6 Sean is growing on me more and more.

Speaker 6 Here's what shoe salesman did for me. Shoe salesman showed me the importance of like

Speaker 6 charisma, charm, right? And in the world of selling shoes,

Speaker 6 you got a commission off of what you sold. I made money off of being personable and getting people to come back.
Oh, God, I can do this. And by the way, I did it because I really learned about it.

Speaker 6 So I didn't have acid. I didn't bullshit it, but I can tell you anything you want to know about a sneaker.
Sean, you got a flat foot. That's a flat sneaker.

Speaker 6 By the way, no polythene or, or no, actually,

Speaker 6 actually, you do. There's a Louis.
Yeah, actually, you do. Here, you have a flat foot, but inside, you may pro nator subernate, so I can't tell.

Speaker 3 These are like $2,000. $1,000 sneakers though, aren't they?

Speaker 6 I know they are, and that's why I had to fucking look differently. You right? Because I saw what they were.
Pro Natal Subanate, I didn't know the way your foot rolls, Jason. I'm just qualifying.

Speaker 3 But yeah, I got it.

Speaker 1 old granddads go to orthotics in here don't worry about it I do it um so dead foot

Speaker 1 it's a dead foot

Speaker 3 my left toe's been numb for years um but um did you but you but you're you're you're saying something there which uh you you there was a challenge to figure out the customer to see who you needed to be to get the commission that you wanted it's kind of like acting kind of changing into the parts that job that job made me realize oh god there's something about me that gets people to do the thing that i I want right

Speaker 6 and when I decided to leave that job and pursue the thing that I wanted to do the person that I had to get to do the things that my customers were my customers were doing was my mom how do I get my mom to believe in the thing that I want to do right so the same way I got the customers to believe that this is the shoe for them I had to take that same cadence that same quality give it to my mom once I got my mom to believe that thing oh my god I'm winning half the battle is done my mom believes in me she supports me but now how do I make money now I had to convince the comedy clubs I can do the thing that I said I would do.

Speaker 3 Was she was she was she so when you said you wanted to be a comic, was she am I understanding you correctly?

Speaker 6 She was like wait come on Kevin really I mean no parent out the gate is supportive

Speaker 6 of the well goodie you want to be a stand-up no like not when you have a different lane that's laid out for you so it was one of convincing

Speaker 1 were you writing jokes like when you started when you were selling shoes were you like already thinking about you wanted to get into comedy you wanted to be a stand-up were you writing jokes were you thinking in that way already I have never written a joke in my life.

Speaker 6 I've never written a joke word for word. Wow.

Speaker 6 At that point, I had funny stuff that I wanted to talk about.

Speaker 3 Stories that you could shape and yeah.

Speaker 6 I had stuff. I'm a person that shapes and molds stuff.

Speaker 2 Who made you laugh the hardest growing up that you're like, oh, that's so funny. In your family?

Speaker 6 I'm going to say it's not a comic.

Speaker 1 My dad.

Speaker 6 Yeah? My dad. Not because he was funny, but because he was so ignorant to what he was doing,

Speaker 6 my dad had no idea the damage that he caused by being himself, but it made you laugh like hell.

Speaker 1 That's the funniest thing I've ever seen. Look at this stupid motherfucker.

Speaker 6 No, you didn't think he was stupid. He was just like, I can't believe you said that.
Like, my dad, my there was a relative that died.

Speaker 6 Um, my mom's sister, and this is dark, but I'm gonna tell you anyway. My mom's sister died, and we go to the funeral.
My dad comes to the funeral, and it's myself and my

Speaker 6 mom's other sisters in the circle. My dad comes up and his first words, he was like, we dropping like flies, ain't we?

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 6 everybody looked around.

Speaker 1 He was like, I just hope I ain't next.

Speaker 6 God damn. And

Speaker 6 nobody could say anything, but it was so bad because they didn't even like him.

Speaker 1 Like, they didn't like my dad.

Speaker 6 They suggested the information as if he was a fan favorite.

Speaker 6 And he had on, like, and it was a funeral. My dad showed up in like white linen at a funeral.

Speaker 6 He's one of a kind, but I can say for me, that guy, he made me understand humor. Humor sometimes is subjective.
My dad has always been subjective.

Speaker 6 Nobody's ever really liked his approach, but that's the side that I gravitated towards. And that's what's in me.

Speaker 1 We'll be right back.

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Speaker 9 The family that vacations together stays together. At least, that was the plan.
Except now, the dastardly desk clerk is saying he can't confirm your connecting rooms.

Speaker 10 Wait, what?

Speaker 6 That's right, ma'am. You have rooms 201 and 709.

Speaker 10 No, we cannot be five floors away from our kids.

Speaker 6 The doors have double locks, they'll be fine.

Speaker 9 When you want connecting rooms confirmed before you arrive, it matters where you stay.

Speaker 1 Welcome to Hilton.

Speaker 9 I see your connecting rooms rooms are already confirmed hilton for this day

Speaker 2 and back to the show

Speaker 1 what was that first time what was that first time you went on stage and did stand-up what was the venue what was do you remember that like laugh house comedy club six people six people six wait what laugh house comedy club showing you fucking heard me laugh house comedy club

Speaker 6 laugh house comedy club six people six people at the goddamn comedy club i go go up, I do jokes. They're not laughing, but they're listening.

Speaker 6 But what I fell in love with was not the people and not the response, but the light. The light didn't deter me.
And that's what people buckle.

Speaker 1 People buckle at the light.

Speaker 4 You're talking about the spot?

Speaker 6 I'm talking about the spotlight. No, Jason, I'm talking about the fucking light bulb on the top.
Yeah, the spotlight. Yes.

Speaker 1 The spotlight. God damn it.

Speaker 3 That is my kryptonite. This show is a little bit more.
This is nerve-wracking. Being on a stage with a spotlight, thank God there isn't one on us.

Speaker 3 Makes me, I just freeze. No, that's that's a spotlight.

Speaker 3 That's an egg crate.

Speaker 3 It's a 50 by 50.

Speaker 6 It's a modern day spotlight. What are you talking about? This is the spotlight.

Speaker 1 You guys gotta cancel it.

Speaker 6 You said something right now. Everybody's gonna get quiet.
They're gonna listen. Some people freeze.
Some people don't. Those that don't win.
I did not freeze.

Speaker 6 And granted, I did not get a laugh that night.

Speaker 1 I kept going.

Speaker 6 And that's what was that was the thing for me.

Speaker 6 That was the bug that bit me. And I was like, this is what I want to do.

Speaker 3 Did you ever have just a wipeout, like a terrible stand-up night that almost got you to say maybe not?

Speaker 6 Absolutely.

Speaker 6 Famous story. I've told it several times, but I'll tell it again.

Speaker 6 Well, it's new to you. That's why I said I'll tell it again.
Thank you, my friend.

Speaker 6 I'm in Atlantic City. I'm doing a joke.
And I remember doing a joke, and the guy stood up. He was like, that's enough.
Shut the fuck up. Throw a buffalo wing at me.
Oh, my God. By the way.

Speaker 6 I've never seen accuracy like this in my life.

Speaker 1 Buffalo wing hits me.

Speaker 6 Hits me right in the face. A little bit of sauce gets in my eye.
Not a lot, enough to give me a problem where I can't see.

Speaker 1 I'm like, all right, that's enough.

Speaker 6 I'm a man first. Don't disrespect me.
He's like, that's enough. We had enough of you.
Get off the stage. Get the fuck off the stage.
I'm like, no, I'm going to finish my jokes.

Speaker 6 And I go to finish my jokes, and the whole crowd was like, oh no, we don't want you to finish.

Speaker 4 They were like, boo, boo, boo.

Speaker 6 I got booed. Some other comics were back there.
They shook my hand. They're like, yo, you're going to be all right? I I was like, yeah, I'll be back next week.
They thought I was playing.

Speaker 6 I came back next week, same crowd. I tried to revamp my set the best that I could.

Speaker 1 I go up, I perform.

Speaker 6 I didn't get booed. I didn't necessarily get big laughs, but I survived the set.
And that was the biggest win for me in my life because I came back to the place that destroyed me. So all of my wins.

Speaker 6 All of my wins in the beginning, I don't have hero stories. I don't have, oh my God, and they stood up and carried me out.
I don't have those stories.

Speaker 6 All of my wins were mental wins and the mental wins came from where I come from where I come from we beat each other up we tear each other down and you know we destroy the confidence that some don't have so to survive that we'll put you in a place of fucking good being that I got out of that I was able to to truly grow and really fall into a place where my talent got to blossom and comedy became realistic because I made my city give me a chance.

Speaker 6 They didn't give it to me. I made them give it to me.

Speaker 3 Is there something that legitimately gives you fear?

Speaker 3 Is it like, you know,

Speaker 3 the health of your family or mortality? Or for me, it's bees.

Speaker 1 I mean, like,

Speaker 1 is there something that you're just like,

Speaker 3 that's always going to be a pet fear of mine that's actually beneficial to you, that keeps you doing what you're doing and doing it well?

Speaker 6 Yeah, I think the real fear right now is

Speaker 6 fucking up

Speaker 6 what's close to being real.

Speaker 6 You know, I got an opportunity to create generational wealth. I got an opportunity to create and break ground that has yet to be broken for me and mine.

Speaker 6 For where I come from, you're part of a story that can amplify and propel different types of,

Speaker 6 I guess you can say, like

Speaker 6 want and

Speaker 6 realistic approach to what a dream can really become. I'm a part of that.

Speaker 6 So, not accomplishing said goals or not finishing the story, it's not about me, it's about the people that now are looking at me and, oh my God, that's how you do it.

Speaker 6 So, if I don't finish the thing that people are watching that I know I can do, I leave the story incomplete. And success to some is not success to me, it's really giving a true, clear visual

Speaker 6 into what wealth can be for where I come from and it doesn't exist. So the fear is that.
The fear is not completing that task.

Speaker 3 Well, and I will say, and I don't mean to embarrass you, but you seem to be doing it in such a graceful, classy, kind way.

Speaker 3 You have a quality that is so infectious with your,

Speaker 3 it's not vulnerability or humanity, but like you're not afraid to make a jackass out of yourself.

Speaker 3 You're never, you're never posturing, you're never playing cool, you're not afraid to be the butt of a joke, and it's so winning and it's so fun to follow and get behind.

Speaker 3 And it's like, I mean, I'd watch you read the phone book.

Speaker 1 It's just fair. I appreciate you.

Speaker 6 I appreciate you.

Speaker 6 I think the dope thing about where we are, and I do say we,

Speaker 1 well, kind of, right? Oh, thank you. Come on, man.
Thank you.

Speaker 1 Right? Yeah.

Speaker 6 Me and you. You already know where we sit.

Speaker 1 That's right. That's right.

Speaker 6 I didn't cancel you. You didn't cancel me.

Speaker 6 All right. We're back on track.

Speaker 6 I think the dope thing about where we sit is, you know, in this business,

Speaker 6 we've been...

Speaker 6 We've been put in the position for a long time to believe that we will work for hire. And those that have hired us,

Speaker 6 as amazing and dope as those opportunities are

Speaker 6 will continue to be that's all we knew that that exists and now you know you're looking in the new era where we can control we can create we can do it's different it's a different agenda and we're supposed to progress we're supposed to grow and the relationships between us and our partners are supposed to become exactly that partnerships and when you see that happening it's well how do you become a part of the thing that's the biggest picture how do you do that and creating opportunities for other people yeah it's like a springboard so that's the priority for me.

Speaker 6 It's no longer about me. I'm not going to be a bigger star.
And I know it sounds like... What? Be a bigger star.
I'm not.

Speaker 3 No,

Speaker 1 you're at the top of the star.

Speaker 6 It's what it is.

Speaker 6 So for me, it's how do I, and I say that humbly, by the way. I'm not.

Speaker 6 I say it, how do I fucking create the opportunity for the next versions to be bigger, to be better? That's the new priority.

Speaker 6 And if you don't find energy in the new thing, then you sit in the old thing.

Speaker 6 You get tired in the old thing. You get lazy in the old thing.
You don't want the old thing.

Speaker 2 Do you see, like, like, is there a moment for you in the future where you see

Speaker 2 that you've reached enough success or a certain goal where you're like, you know what, I'm good. Now I can kind of slow down.

Speaker 2 And we touched on that before, but is there something, is there a goal in mind where you're like, if I can reach that, I can maybe settle down and calm down a little bit?

Speaker 6 I think that there definitely...

Speaker 6 There definitely is, but I think that for me, that would be very selfish knowing my background if i go i'm done i tap out and i'm just going to ride out and be good when i have the opportunity to create other opportunities that i think i'm doing a disservice to those that need a service so i would much rather

Speaker 6 i would much rather provide the the olive branch where I can. And look, if it happens and that olive branch is great and people come and they go through, then good.
I did some dope shit.

Speaker 6 If they don't, at least I tried and I can say that I gave an opportunity for a bigger, a bigger conversation to be attached to the success outside of me.

Speaker 6 And that's what you start to struggle with, right? Like you, you make money, you get big, you get growing, then you get to go on, oh, wait, well, what else?

Speaker 6 What else is important? Because it can't just be fame.

Speaker 2 Is there somebody that

Speaker 2 inspired you to think this way? To

Speaker 1 this, your mom. Rest in peace.
My mom.

Speaker 6 Yeah. My mom was always, my mom is a,

Speaker 6 you second those first. And my mom was always a,

Speaker 6 it's it's so sad when you look at the people around a person that's happy and those people are unhappy they're unhappy because a person's happiness is solo right how does your happiness how do you spread it out like what are you doing to to to give that thing out Where's your energy go?

Speaker 6 How are you truly implementing it into the lives of others?

Speaker 1 And it's a conversation that we don't have enough, right?

Speaker 6 As people, we're very selfish. We're We're very selfish at times within what we have and what we want to give.
I don't think that that's right.

Speaker 6 I think that if I have a high level of happy, if I have a high level of good or information, it's my fucking job to try to give to those that can benefit off of it. That's my job.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 1 I think that people don't key in on that enough that they don't know that actually that is the key to happiness, is giving it away.

Speaker 1 And I don't monetarily sure, but your energy and whatever that is that you have if you whatever you put out is what you're gonna get back and that and that may seem like well that's not altruistic because you're just doing it to get a result but you will get such joy if you constantly put that out to other people and make people feel good you'll end up feeling and that's this that's something that I think that people really sleep on they're not only sleep on it but if you really go and look at some of the if you go look at some of the most

Speaker 6 celebrated, the most celebrated happiest people, right, of our time or before our time, you'll look at their life they struggled a lot the things that you think they had they didn't have but what they found joy in was was providing providing it for others people find joy in seeing other people

Speaker 6 glow and and what we've lost we've lost that so if you look at where we are now this is weird battle amongst people because we're trying to control one another We're not allowing each other to fucking flourish and benefit and be who you are.

Speaker 6 We're trying to make you what we want you to be, who we want you to be.

Speaker 1 I'm a fan of joy.

Speaker 6 I'm a fan of smile. I'm a fan of happy.
I'm a fan of love. I always have been.

Speaker 6 That's what I'm a fan of. So, if it's not that, for me, it doesn't work.

Speaker 1 It's that simple.

Speaker 2 I tried stand-up once.

Speaker 1 How did that go? Thank you. Thank you.
How did it go? Thank you for asking.

Speaker 2 And my opening line was: I think I said this on the podcast. My opening joke was, you know, they say ballet is one of the most difficult things you can do.
So I say, don't do it.

Speaker 1 Well,

Speaker 1 we just learned. Wow.
What did we just learn?

Speaker 3 We just learned sometimes careers can last one joke.

Speaker 1 Well, I was going to say that.

Speaker 1 I mean, I was going to say that. If we're being real, I'm still waiting for the joke.

Speaker 1 Well,

Speaker 6 Sean just

Speaker 6 showed us why he didn't make it.

Speaker 6 No,

Speaker 6 there's a lot of different things.

Speaker 1 Yeah, this is why I'm not royalty.

Speaker 3 So you say

Speaker 3 you're not going to pack up and retire anytime soon.

Speaker 3 I'm not retired.

Speaker 1 Not right. Not before I'm 50.

Speaker 3 Not before you're 50. No.
Okay, are you going to squeeze in any more of these great movies with Dwayne Johnson before then? Because it's been really awesome.

Speaker 3 Now, you know, are you guys as close as it seems? Because the chemistry is just awesome.

Speaker 6 You guys think this relationship is so great.

Speaker 1 My back hurts.

Speaker 1 Carrying that guy is tough.

Speaker 6 Carrying that big motherfucker

Speaker 6 to the finish line is tough.

Speaker 6 I can be honest with you. DJ and I are very close.

Speaker 6 That's a really good friend of mine. And our chemistry on screen is the same as off-screen.
screen and that's why we have that's why we've won we we don't go into our trailers in between shots

Speaker 6 when we're on set we're on set and when we work together we truly do work together and I love the fact that it's been far a few in between because we got something and we we saw each other we just did a we got an animation movie coming out

Speaker 6 with the DC it's the super pets and wait is snowballing that no that's not Snowball.

Speaker 3 By the way, can I have some more Snowball, please?

Speaker 6 By the way, Snowball's coming, but this is a different pet. I don't want to talk about Snowball now, because I got to talk about the other pet.
By the way, maybe the same voice. I'm not confident.

Speaker 6 What I love, though, is that we got together and we talked, man, and we were like...

Speaker 6 We just got to figure out the next one. But we both know it's never going to be duplicated.
You don't get that thing a lot.

Speaker 6 And we're very fortunate to have had the opportunity to make the the movies that we have.

Speaker 6 And, you know, it's dope.

Speaker 3 It must be nice that you've got somebody you're so close with that your escalation and your careers have been very, very, very similar.

Speaker 3 And you have someone to talk to about what's great about it, what's challenging about it,

Speaker 3 how you're adjusting mentally, spiritually, all of that stuff.

Speaker 6 I'll tell you what, though, he's a lot more.

Speaker 6 DJ's much more grounded.

Speaker 6 And

Speaker 6 he's more concrete than I am. How soft? Well, because I'm in the shit.

Speaker 6 I'm in the shit.

Speaker 1 I'm in the shit, man. What does that mean?

Speaker 6 Well, I'm touring.

Speaker 1 I'm out all the time.

Speaker 1 I'm on the road, off the road.

Speaker 6 I got the people. I'm dealing with the same soft.

Speaker 1 You're saying he's a dealer.

Speaker 6 I'm saying I'm more hands-on into the world and more interactive

Speaker 6 with people on the everyday.

Speaker 6 He is

Speaker 6 from his company side and all of his

Speaker 6 ventures.

Speaker 6 But the live entertainment aspect, he's removed from. So remember the world when he was in wrestling and live performing, that's a different energy.

Speaker 6 You're giving a different energy to people every day. You got to be on.
You got to be fucking on. He would get off of a wrestling match and then rock, do the thing.
He's got to do the eyebrow.

Speaker 6 He's got to take a picture.

Speaker 1 To me.

Speaker 6 He's got to do the eyebrow. That's me.

Speaker 1 And then he's got to to eat, doesn't he eat like 40 chickens a day or something?

Speaker 1 It's like, like, I was like,

Speaker 1 and the rock's new menu. And I'm like, okay, let's hear it.
You know, and he's like, it's 30 steaks.

Speaker 6 I think he's done a great job. He's done a great job at like, you know, cutting that side off, venturing into his new side.
And, and, and DJ, the business guy, is a good dude.

Speaker 6 And that dude is flourishing. I'm still.

Speaker 1 He's a sweet guy, too. He's such a really good guy.
No, he's a dickhead. He's a dickhead.

Speaker 6 He's a dickhead. It's not what you think dickhead.

Speaker 4 I just want to be on the right.

Speaker 1 I want him to know that I said he was a sweet guy because, you know, he's a big dude, as we know.

Speaker 3 Now, you're doing

Speaker 3 something like we're doing here. You got a podcast, Comedy Goldmines, as well.
Yes.

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah. Now,

Speaker 3 is it like

Speaker 3 a chat show about with

Speaker 3 comics and

Speaker 3 talking about comedy and standards?

Speaker 6 I do all organic authentic conversation right

Speaker 6 all preservatives whatsoever and I challenge Jason and I challenge you to do the same thing too

Speaker 1 you know we have these people

Speaker 6 right we have you don't need these do you well no you don't you shouldn't have those right because there's a beauty in the unknown mostly just a bounce for my bags right well I get it

Speaker 6 I get it whether you whether you need them

Speaker 6 Whether you need them or not. Whether you need them or not.

Speaker 6 What I love to do, I love to actually discover. Like, I like the fact that I don't know.
And when I don't know, I'm going to ask. And the person has to answer the questions.

Speaker 6 So, as comedians, comedians are dark. Some aren't.
Some really have other issues, but you've never heard it. And the people that you think you love, you really don't know.

Speaker 6 So on comedy gold minds, you got an opportunity to dive into the minds of some of your favorite humorous fucking individuals. And they say shit that you never thought they would say.
Why?

Speaker 6 Because we have talks and conversations that takes them in the directions that you never thought that we would go. And conversations in general, that's what we're missing.

Speaker 6 So organic, real-driven transparency, I think that's what people need to see. You need to get back to seeing people be humans and not be programmed.

Speaker 6 So on comedy gold mines, comedians are actually fucking humans.

Speaker 3 How often are you doing it?

Speaker 6 I'm behind you, Jason, whenever I have time. I'm pretty fucking busy, man.
Yep.

Speaker 6 You know, the schedule keeps changing, but.

Speaker 1 We got nothing. We're doing this all the time.

Speaker 1 You know what?

Speaker 1 We haven't traveled with it kevin you know what i love though you know what i love about you you talk about you're doing all these things but at the you know at the root of it you're still the same guy that you were absolutely 20 years ago you have not changed you're busier you got more stuff you had a lot more free time back then but you're the same dude and you have that same perspective that's so so refreshing to be the biggest win for you

Speaker 6 i think so and i i hope that people that know me uh well i want to say i hope i know yeah people that know me know that i think from the outside uh the perception is always going to be different.

Speaker 6 Like, for example, I got fucking glasses on now. And I'm going to be honest with you, I know I look like a dick, but if I take these off,

Speaker 1 it's been a couple long days.

Speaker 6 Yes. It's been some long days.
And I know these eyes are dripping as I'm talking. That's why I'm blocking them.
But I think the most important thing for me is I'm so fucking genuine. Like,

Speaker 6 I'm so good to the people that know me. I really am who I say I am.
And when I tell you, like, Jason, when he said, Kev, you wanna do it? I said, absolutely.

Speaker 1 It was very fast.

Speaker 6 It was very fast. I didn't even vet it out.
By the way, this could have been some freaky shit. I didn't know what to tell this.

Speaker 6 But I didn't vet it out because I'm like, I'm like, I like the dude. I know where he comes from.
I remember when we did X, Y, and Z together on Simpson Intelligence. We talked.

Speaker 6 JC, you never asked me for nothing. I'm there.
That's truly who I am.

Speaker 2 But it's one. It's just one favor.

Speaker 1 That's it. Yeah.

Speaker 6 No, no, no, because this wasn't a bad one. Like, you guys got a good thing going here.
You got a great thing. Actually, you have a fantastic thing.

Speaker 6 You got a fucking crowd full of people to support you guys.

Speaker 3 Well, you made it, you made it real, real good tonight, and we cannot thank you enough, buddy.

Speaker 1 It was really cool to see you.

Speaker 1 Thank you, Kyle.

Speaker 1 Buddy, thank you, my friend.

Speaker 4 Thank you, Kyle. Sean.

Speaker 1 That's uh

Speaker 2 He did not look back as he was walking away.

Speaker 1 Oh, I know.

Speaker 1 He did not look back. He's confident.
Yeah, he's really confident. That was a confident walk away.
By the way, great get. Great get.
I'm a huge guy.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 2 He, you know, I meant that what I said, you know, a lot of people get into, like, a lot of actors are like, oh, how do I.

Speaker 1 They love you.

Speaker 3 We love him. What about these guys? No, that's okay.

Speaker 1 Rude. It's okay.

Speaker 1 We don't need love. A lot of actors.

Speaker 3 My mother and my sister.

Speaker 1 Sig, stand up.

Speaker 2 A lot of actors, you know, try.

Speaker 1 There it is.

Speaker 1 No, it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter.

Speaker 1 I love you, too.

Speaker 1 All right, so coming up.

Speaker 2 So, you know, a lot of actors, you know, try to get it. A lot of actors try to get into other facets of the business because you realize you have to diversify.

Speaker 2 And he's such a huge inspiration to so many people who are just like maybe stuck just doing one thing as an actor. Like, how can I follow Kevin Hart, man? Everything, read up on him.

Speaker 2 How he did it is just so inspiring. It's amazing to me.

Speaker 4 Yeah, it's incredible.

Speaker 1 And I meant it that he is quite literally just the same dude. He's so, he's got his feet on the ground and he's, of course, he's just flying at such a different altitude now.
I love it.

Speaker 1 But maintaining that sort of that same sense of himself is pretty good.

Speaker 3 He's got all, he's still, and he does all that work. He's still got got time to work out i mean he's huge he's like he's almost like he's by on it

Speaker 3 smart

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