Episode 898 - Randee Neumeyer

Hi, he's Dave Shumka.

And he's Graham Clark.

And together we host Stop Podcasting Yourself.

Woo!

Hello, everybody, and welcome to episode number 898 of Stop Podcasting Yourself.

My name is Graham.

And with me, as always, is a man who, this is, would you say this week two of No Beard?

Mr.

Dave Shumka.

I'd say it's week four or five.

Oh, really?

Gosh.

Yeah, man.

Yeah.

Seems not that long ago, but also.

But it could come back anytime.

Is it like if you're just too lazy to shave for a couple of days, or if you make a conscious decision, we're bringing back the beard?

Yeah.

It's usually a conscious decision.

I talk to my priest.

I talk to my family.

And you all, you

do it like

just one day at a time.

You check in.

Okay, the whiskers are starting to form.

We're building a beard here.

Yeah, I do it one day at a time.

I'm sort of like the whiskers are starting to form.

We're building a beard here.

What are you talking about?

Shave your beard every once in a while.

Yeah, you should, right?

Show everybody my weirdo chin.

Yeah.

Go on.

Like when they would do on Jenny Jones, they would do makeover.

Makeover.

And like someone would bring their son who's like a biker dude.

Yeah.

And they'd be like, put him in a v-neck sweater.

But he stays a biker dude, but then he starts wearing v-neck sweaters everywhere.

He's still got his like patches.

He's got his biker vest is a sweater vest, and it's got crocheted onto it.

If you can read this, the bitch fell off.

See, that's a makeover that worked.

Our guest today, very funny comedian.

She has featured on the

new waves of stand-up on CBC Jam.

New waves, new waves, new wave of stand-up, new wave, new wave of stand-up.

It's Randy Newmeire.

Hello, Randy.

Hello, what's up?

It's all happening, Randy.

It's all happening.

How are you doing?

I'm good.

I'm breaking a new pair of Doc Martens.

That's huge.

Yeah.

How long have you had them?

Just today.

Today's all of the shit.

Did they arrive in the mail today?

No, I bought them a few days ago, but today I'm like walking around in them all day till the blood comes.

Yeah, yeah, exactly.

The blood comes.

Do we want to get to know us?

Yeah.

Get to know us.

Randy, you as how

many pairs of Doc Bartons have you owned in your life?

This is just my second pair.

Okay.

So

we're the first pair brand new?

Yes, I've been buying brand new, but that's only because I have big feet and Facebook Marketplace doesn't, you know,

I am aware I always have to buy my shoes new as well.

There's no chance of a thrift store shoe-fitting.

Wide Flintstone feet is what I oh, yeah.

I mean, I think that's most people will go new shoe.

Yeah.

Like, even if you're into thrifting, you're like, well, I mean, I probably get a couple pairs of new shoes.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I did get some converse at the thrift store.

Okay, if you have big feet, go to the Richmond Value Village.

They always have size 10s there for some reason.

Okay.

Are you size 10?

Yeah, I'm a size 10.

Jealous?

But I got these

commerce and then I found a spider inside them.

Oh shoe.

Live spider?

No, it was dead.

Okay, but still.

How long have those shoes been sitting there that a spider killed it?

Exactly.

Oh boy, was there...

No, it was Little Miss Muffet who had the spider.

It wasn't the old lady who lived in the shoe.

No, she suffocated from carbon monoxide.

And

there was also a spider who went up the water spout.

Oh, yeah.

And taught us something about perseverance.

That's right.

Did we get to know this?

We did.

Good.

Welcome back, everybody.

You were asking about

the Doc Martens.

I also have a question about the Doc Martens, and here it is.

Do you still have your old Doc Martens?

Yes, because they're different.

They're different.

So

this is your second pair.

Have you, before you got that first pair, what was your go-to?

Probably a high-top Converse.

Nice.

Okay, yeah.

Classic.

Can you still wear those?

They hurt my back.

I can't wear them anymore.

The high-top Converse?

Yeah.

What?

Like the Converse Classics?

Oh, I still have three pairs.

Yeah, I used to have, that was my go-to shoe.

And then...

I wore mine today, and I

then I changed out of them.

I wore them to drop off because my kids were both wearing theirs.

Yeah.

And then I

then had to walk the dogs, and I was like, I'm going going to put on a

more supportive sneaker.

Yeah, supportive sneaker.

Oh no, is this the future?

Yeah, the future.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Like you'll be, you'll be walking on a very hard surface at one point.

You'll be like, huh, that doesn't feel quite right.

My back, maybe your neck.

I don't know.

What else are the things?

What else are they?

Yeah, yeah.

Well, your crack is part of it as well.

And I don't know, the dealer's choice.

But I still like a, you know, I like a canvas summertime shoe of A.

Oh, I love them, yeah.

Oh, yeah, yeah.

I like a KED.

A KED of AM.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

But you don't need any kind of, well, obviously, you don't need any support if you're wearing Converse around.

No.

Good for you.

I hope that stays that way.

Yeah.

Now, last time you were on the show, I remember the one thing I was like, well, Randy hasn't been on since before the pandemic.

Oh, yeah.

How was your pandemic?

I actually loved it, man.

I got into exercising.

It was a lifelong goal, and now I do it all the time.

Nice.

Before you were on, before

the pandemic, you were on the show and we were talking about spin class.

Oh, yes.

So you were already into exercising.

That wasn't true.

Like, that was like, I found out spin class is just like evil cardio.

It's not actually building muscle.

Oh, it's it just and it's just humiliating you?

Is that what they're into?

In a way.

And now I like weightlift, but I still do spin classes on YouTube in the gym.

So it's just me in a room with people being like,

I do, or I see those Peloton,

I see videos of,

I don't know, for some reason in my algorithm, I get videos of Peloton classes where they'll shout out usernames and there's a lot of like,

you know, IP freely.

Like it's videos of benchmarks

tricking the.

That's good.

I like that.

Yeah.

Like, oh, great work on this.

Hey, congratulations on your 100th ride.

Jonathan Pooh face.

I can't think of any fun pun.

What do you bench?

What's your bench?

Ooh, you're.

How much your bench?

Yeah, how much a bench.

Okay, well, I can hip thrust over 100.

That's great.

But only on the dance floor.

But when I'm doing chest, I'm only lifting 40.

Nothing bad about that.

You're doing it.

You're out there.

You're lifting.

Did you have to take any kind of class to figure out how to do all that stuff?

Or did you just learn online?

No, I learned from like Instagram, YouTube, TikTok.

Okay.

Nice.

I don't know how to, yeah.

I think in high school, we did weightlifting in like grade 11 and 12.

And just kind of, hey, kids, learn your way around the gym.

Yeah.

And

I remember the gym teacher saying, and don't be worried about stunting your growth because that's like this is so this is like if you just learn it properly, you won't stunt your growth.

Because that was, I guess, a big concern about like little kids starting weightlifting too early.

It's never too early, kids.

And never too late, unless you're quite,

you know.

That was a big thing about stunting your growth.

It was a big thing growing.

Drinking coffee.

Drinking coffee.

Drinking cigarettes.

Smoking cigarettes.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I wonder if I did smoke cigarettes.

I probably would have been like 7-2 at this point.

I would have just kept growing exponentially, but love those ciggies.

Me and my dad always drank coffee together.

Yeah.

I'm 5'7 ⁇ , man.

And that didn't stun your foot growth.

Jealous.

We had a kid over for a play date this weekend, and she had very big feet.

And I was...

Because she left her shoes at the front door.

I'm like, this isn't a kid's shoe.

Who's here in adult shoes?

Everybody, hold up your feet.

Oh, it's you.

Was it like a size seven?

That was a size five, but

she was very, she's in grade three.

Yeah.

She's bigger than my grade five kid.

Is it like with a puppy where they have big

paws?

Yeah, she just needs to grow into them.

I've got big paws.

So, yeah,

maybe she'll be.

What's a tall person activity besides basketball?

Javelin?

What's a bigfoot person activity?

Certainly being Bigfoot.

Speaking of all things Olympic sport, Javelin,

a shot put champion

just set a record, and it was Brock Lesnar's daughter.

And man, is she Brock Lesnar's daughter?

Holy cow.

Because Brock Lesnar is a wrestler?

He's a wrestler that's shaped like a trapezoid.

Shouldn't he be Brock Wrestler?

You know what?

They really missed an opportunity there.

He's shaped like a trapezoid.

I'm imagining that He-Man fellow, the young He-Man fellow.

Yeah.

With the springy legs.

His microgad.

Anyway.

But yeah, anyways.

Any shot put

aspirations?

No, the only shot put person's name I know is Miss Trench Bull.

Well, she was a hammer thrower.

Oh, she was a hammer throw?

It was the same mechanism, mechanics of hammer throwing that she used to grab that girl by the braids.

Do you know who this is?

I just think it's very funny that a girl would be pulled by the braids.

She's from Matilda.

Oh, okay.

And she's a champion hammer thrower.

Yeah.

Hmm.

I've never read Matilda.

Don't know my way around the Matilda list.

Well, it's also a book and a musical.

I mean, also a movie and a musical and a movie musical.

Really?

Is it old?

Is it from back in the day?

It's Rolled Doll.

Oh, okay.

Rolled Doll.

It's kind of old.

I read it when I was a kid.

Yeah.

But the movie's from the 90s?

Danny DeVito.

Oh, yeah.

He played Matilda.

And Rhea Perlman as the parents.

Really?

Yeah.

I love that.

Why don't they work together more?

They're quite a pair.

Yeah.

Do they not?

I think I heard that they were divorced, but they live in houses right next to each other or some crazy thing.

Yeah, I heard that.

Yeah, I

that I mean, they seem to have a special relationship.

I mean, that would be an interesting compromise.

Like, okay, we're going to get the divorce, but we have to be next-door neighbors.

That is like the ultimate enriched person.

Luxury.

We're just going to have our own house.

Well, we can buy these houses side by side and be divorced.

I think that's the ultimate goal when you're married, though.

It's to live in your own house.

Live in a house beside them.

Yeah, I mean, hey, that's the dream, right?

I can only live it by going camping, and then we'll sleep in our own tents.

Yeah.

Yeah, Teddy DeVito's got, he's got to be a very rich man at this point.

He's been in a lot of blockbuster films.

And, you know what?

And taxi.

That's right.

Taxi.

And that was it, TV-wise.

Oh, no.

Always sending to Philadelphia.

Yeah, I can't imagine that pays very much.

Well, at this point, he doesn't need to make any money.

He's got all that Batman Returns money, right?

The Matilda money.

That keeps coming in.

And he redirected

Death the Smoochie from Home Over the Train.

Yeah.

Death the Smoochie was good.

Yeah.

He's got kind of a.

Is that Edward Norton?

Yeah.

Yeah.

And Robin Williams?

Yeah, I think so.

I don't think I ever saw it.

I don't think I ever saw it.

What's your favorite Robin Williams film?

I'm putting you on the spot, I know.

If I go off like childhood,

it's probably Hook.

Yeah, Hook's a good one.

Yeah.

Is he in that?

Yeah, he's...

Have you seen that?

Are you serious?

But do you remember that terrible movie he was in called Jack?

We talked about that.

We talked about Jack last week.

Was it last week?

So bad.

Maybe off air, though.

We were talking, I had it backwards.

Oh, no, I was talking about Kimberly Akimbo, the musical that's coming to town, or they're putting a production on.

And

it's about a girl

who has a child with an old person body or something.

Yeah.

Which is Jack, right?

Yeah, yeah.

And it's like in the film, he gets to go to school with kids.

He is a kid.

I know, but he gets to be with other kids, even though he's an adult.

Jesus.

I wouldn't want some adult-looking guy around my kids, I'll tell you that.

Jack should be old-schooled, all right?

And then, since he, I guess, he dies faster than a regular person, he dies so fast,

he dies about two hours in, I think.

Oh, he would be so popular in high school, though, getting everybody liquor and cigarettes.

Dying, dying, he didn't get that far.

Does Jack die in the end?

I feel like he must have died.

I think he does.

Yeah.

But...

Sorry, surprise.

Yeah, sorry if you haven't seen Jack.

What?

Yeah.

I feel like as a kid, there were Robin Williams.

Is Rob Williams in Mrs.

Deltfire?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Is that a serious question?

And who...

He's not in Good Morning Vietnam, is he?

Nope.

I'm not falling for this again.

But there was that movie Toys,

and I was like, oh, this is going to be great.

It's my two favorite things as a kid.

Toys and Robin Williams.

And I never saw it.

Because I don't know what it was about

as a kid

trusting

a movie reviewer.

It's like, well, but the reviewers say Toys isn't very good.

Yeah.

When was the first, that's a very good question.

Like, when were you first conscious of movie reviews going into, because you have to read it out of the paper at one point.

Yeah.

There was only like two, you know, Siskel and Ebert, and then the guy with the crazy mustache.

What was his name?

Gene Chalet.

There was Leonard Malton as well on Entertainment Tonight.

Oh, Siskel and Ebert.

So that's, I think that's when they were on TV.

Yeah.

Yeah, they're the thumbs.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Thumbing each other.

And they, you know, they loved each other, but boy, did they clash when they were on the air?

I don't think they loved each other.

No, I don't think they hated each other.

Yeah.

I think that was.

There is.

It's now well documented.

I feel like there's been a documentary about them or something about how they

like the premise for the show was that they are from rival newspapers and they don't like each other.

And then there's all that footage of them,

like the

stuff cut out of the show of like.

Them being like mean to each other.

Yeah.

And Siskel is like making fat jokes left and right about Ebert.

Yeah, well, Ebert could have made bald jokes.

He could have shot him right back across.

Yeah,

what was the movie that

they stood so far apart on?

I think it was Under Siege.

And Ebert was like, this is great.

This is so great.

And he's going to be star this Steven Segal.

But yeah, you had to like, when was the first time I read a review of something?

Maybe Edward Sears Air Hands.

I confirmed my choice.

Said it was magical.

And I enjoyed it.

Do you read a Rotten Tomato before you watch a movie?

I'm

not sure now.

not really you just go what by vibe from title what you've heard from people kind of like i i already know what i want to watch yeah you know like i only watch like a certain caliber movie yeah or the worst movie like the worst horror movie like i really want to see the new final destination oh i'm excited about the new final destination hell yeah i when we made uh the podcast let's make a horror uh we interviewed the directors of the final the new final destination movie and what they've directed ryan beal before so that's how we got them and they

told us like when you you

when you direct a movie like the way it works it's kind of you kind of audition and you like they meet a bunch of directors and they want you to kind of prove yourself and this was during the pandemic and it was all on zoom and they did a thing the two directors

they had like rigged a thing in their zoom that there was going to be some kind of Rube Goldberg

death on their Zoom screen.

And so they did something where, you know, like the fan falls off,

the ceiling fan falls off, and cuts one of their heads off.

The

ad campaign for this new one, there's a lot of like semi-trucks with logs that have Final Destination written on the end of them.

I've got to see in the theater before anybody spoils the gags.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I heard it's good, though.

yeah i to me all the final destinations are good

how many were there or are there i think this is six this would be six yeah

and the one of them was uh had a comedian that i knew sam sam easton yeah he was in it and his death was so funny because they you there he's stuck at a drive-through he's boxed in and a

Sammy trailer has got out of control and was driving down towards and you're like, okay, we're going to get smashed by the Sammy trailer.

The Sammy trailer hits a tree, and the engine flies out, and it has that fan, and it chops his head up backwards.

Oh, gosh.

They're brilliant, these guys.

They're brilliant.

Is that the third one?

That's the third one.

Yeah, I don't think I've seen that one.

Shot here in Vancouver.

Oh, same with, I just watched the fifth one, it's on the bridge that goes to North Ven.

Oh, yeah.

So every time I'm on the bridge, I'm like, this is the bridge.

This is it, man.

I think they might all be shot here.

Which is the one with the tanning bed?

I think that's the same one.

Okay, well, that's shot here.

That one's hilarious, too, because a board falls on the two pods, and then they somehow the thing turns up and they fry to death.

That's look, these guys are brilliant.

Hats off to them.

That Ruby old machine thing sounds awesome.

You build one, right?

You built a Ruby.

Yeah, we had to

for my daughter's

science experiment.

Yeah.

Physics, man.

Yeah, this is making physics fun.

We were talking a couple of weeks ago, and

what um movies did you have to watch in school oh yeah someone brought well we talked about it and then there was like a topic on the facebook group i feel like this is a rich vein okay so we always watched october sky oak what's this shake gyll and hall yes shake gyl and all where they build a rocket oh yeah yes we always watched santi claus

i don't know why they love to show that one to us and but one time so i used to be obsessed with walking phoenix Sure.

And I was obsessed with the movie Quills, which is about the Marquis de Saud.

And I convinced my social studies teacher to play that movie in class.

And there's so much nudity.

Of course.

And I'm just like still in shock that she was like that dumb to let me do that.

I do like the idea of a PG movie about the Marquis de Saud.

Yeah, because we were just talking about there were certain shows and movies that you got shown that was like typical.

I've never heard October Sky.

Was that physics?

I guess it's because it was like kind of science-y.

Yeah, physics.

Yeah, physics, probably.

Yeah.

Was that

in the days of having a TV strapped to a cart?

Or is this?

Yeah,

that's a cart for sure.

Yeah, it's a cart strapper.

We did, I took a film class in like grade 11 or 12, and the teacher

would pick a director, and like you would watch a movie by the director in class, and then you'd have to watch a movie by yourself,

another movie, and then kind of like compare and contrast.

Remember the director he chose, we did it twice.

Once it was

Scorsese,

and then once it was Joel Schumacher.

Really?

Yeah, what Joel Schumacher movie did we watch?

Flatliners or something?

Yeah, he did.

He's the Batman and Robin Conterturns or Jeff Batman.

Pirates of the Caribbean?

No, that's Gore Verbinski.

What?

What?

No, don't take.

Don't try and fight Dale on Pirates of the Caribbean.

Yeah, once I start saying Gore Verbinski, there's no stopping me.

Yeah, I think I ended up watching Falling Down as my other Joel Schumacher.

Yeah, Michael Douglas.

Have you seen Falling Down?

I don't think so.

It's kind of the OG men's right activist kind of film, the lone gunman kind of.

Michael Douglas is a guy who's just a middle-aged guy who's just been pushed too far.

Yeah, and he's just gone nuts.

Why do I go to a restaurant and they stop serving breakfast at 10.30?

Yeah, and he goes in with a machine gun and he wants a burger that looks like the burger on the menu.

And

it's but like, you could see a certain type of teenager really going like, hell yeah.

But like,

yeah, I think a different guy would be like, huh, why, why do they stop serving the breakfast at this time?

Maybe I should become a stand-up comedian.

This just sounds like Joker.

Joker.

DNA there of Joker.

I wonder if it's good.

I mean, it was good when I was a teenager, but it was only good because I was a stupid teenager.

I don't know if it like...

Falling down?

Yeah.

Like, I don't know if that would.

I don't know if it ages well having like.

I am a middle-aged white guy and things aren't going the way I like.

Yeah.

I feel there's probably some racist stuff in there too that, you know, slip through the cracks like early 90s stuff would.

Did you see the Joker sequel?

Trying to find somebody who has.

No, I haven't seen it, though.

I do love Lady Gaga, and I think she's a great actress.

Yeah, I like her too, and I...

That's one of those things.

Like, if I, if movie reviews didn't exist, I would go see that movie.

Yeah, yeah, of course.

It's the joker.

I hadn't heard people say it was bad.

I heard people say Joker 1 was good, and I disagreed, but I still saw it.

Yeah, the

I'm just starting to think, like, every movie that I like try to...

like I want to stream, I always check the reviews first.

I don't know why I do that.

Why shouldn't I just go buy what the...

I don't even watch trailers.

No.

I'm like,

this seems like a movie I like.

I'll see it.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Just

like, do you go see any movies?

You saw Friendship in the Theater?

Yeah, I did.

Do you see any trailers of movies that you're like, maybe?

I saw it at the screening right before you saw it.

Oh, really?

So I think we saw the same trailers.

Was Wes Anderson one of them?

Yeah, the Wes Anderson movie.

Yeah.

And then anything by what, the guy that you said before, Gorbidol?

Nothing by Gorbinski.

But

Dwayne The Rock Johnson is is a wrestler or UFC guy.

Full head of hair.

I think that's going to be good.

I think it's going to be good too.

I think I saw that.

I was like, Graham is going to.

I wouldn't want to be Genesis.

He's going to see his jeans.

I wouldn't want to be Graham's jeans right now.

And then what was the other trailer?

Oh,

no, that was a picture you sent me of the John Viminsky King.

Was it Joe Joaquin Phoenix?

Other Joaquin Phoenix one where there's like a bunch of pictures from phones.

There's a new Joaquin Phoenix.

Is it him and Pedro pascal oh yeah

what was that called

yeah you you gotta keep on top of this randy i know i fell off what's the best joaquin phoenix film in your it's called eddington it's coming out eddington eddington the best joaquin phoenix film especially no like when you were obsessed when you were oh when i quills quills

but i used to watch to die for and but i was like such a little kid that i didn't understand what was was truly happening with Joaquin and Nicole Kidman.

I was like, what's going on?

Why is it bad?

What is going on?

I haven't seen it.

Oh, it's like she's a reporter and she goes, she wants to talk to these students in high school.

And then she starts a weird relationship with them where she tries to get them to kill her husband.

And

boundaries get crossed.

Wow, that's a pretty good synopsis.

Well, Well, yeah.

I mean, I was fine with it.

You can kill my husband, but don't cross any boundaries here.

We've got to keep this appropriate.

Yeah, tonight was great.

Nicole Kidman's great.

She's been reliably great decade in, decade out.

I just watched Baby Girl.

Woo-wee.

That's a steamy, steamy, Nicole Kidman.

She brings it to the...

Again, I'm just thinking about it.

Oh, my God.

Do you see it?

Yeah, I saw it.

Did it make you want to drink a giant glass of milk?

Because that's what it is to drink.

I grew up drinking milk, so I always want to drink a glass of milk.

Yeah.

I was a milk household.

You were a milk household.

Yeah, yeah.

You're a milk household now.

To this day.

Do you ever drink like just a giant glass of milk?

Cold glass of milk?

Ooh, nothing like that.

That's good.

Yeah.

I will.

No.

No,

I'll just have a coffee.

Yeah.

Coffee is like, milk was my go-to for cookies.

Yeah.

Oh, yeah.

I remember reading Harriet the Spy and

her nanny gives her a big thing of cake and milk at the end of the school day.

And I thought that sounded so good.

It does sound good.

But now if I have like an afternoon snicky snack, I'll just have a coffee.

With milk.

With milk?

Sure.

Cafe Olay.

Yeah.

You're going to get a latte right after this, is that right?

That's right.

I got one right before.

Shit, you guys.

You guys love milk.

Do you drink latte?

No, I don't.

I just drink coffee.

I don't

I'm it's wasted on me, all this kind of stuff, the steam and the boil and the pour over and the I just it's it's too much milk.

It's too much silk.

There you go.

I said it's too much milk and a latte.

Do you ever have just a glass of milk on its own?

No.

Do you keep milk in the house?

No.

No.

Oat milk.

I'm an oat milk.

Sure.

No, you would never have a glass of that.

No, God, no.

It's it's for like

it's in coffee.

Yeah.

You still, you got milk in the household?

No, I'm I'm kind of like

healthy.

I just have almond milk for smoothies.

You're healthy?

Like,

you're healthy.

I mean, like, this is what?

Like, I try to, like,

also, I know the milk industry is evil, so I try to not partake anymore.

Right.

Except that latte you're going to have.

It's going to be oat.

Oh, yeah, let's do that.

We were, you and I were on the road together in Yukon, and we were at the place that the show was happening, and you were trying to find something on the menu that was healthy, and it was, I laughed and laughed and laughed.

What was

it probably like fried pickles was the most

French fries?

Yeah, I just ended up eating.

I almost got the French, the fried pickles at Popeye's the other day.

What stopped you?

I was,

it was sort of a communication breakdown between me and the...

I go in there sometimes to get their biscuits.

Ooh, I like those biscuits.

And then I was like, oh, what's the deal with those fried pickles?

And they were like,

you can get it, it comes in a pack of like 12.

And I'm like, oh, I want one.

Yeah, yeah.

Can you just give me one?

They should give samples like at an ice cream place.

Yeah.

Can you just give me one pickle?

They also have pickle.

They have like five pickle things on the menu.

One of them is pickle lemonade.

Gross.

Is that a peel?

You sour?

Pickle lemonade?

That could be good, actually.

You ever just drink from a pickle jar?

Like,

yeah, you ever do that?

Yeah, yeah, it's nice.

It's uh, yeah, it's an experience.

Have you ever had a pickleback?

It says, um,

pickle and fa?

I think it's a shot of whiskey and then a shot of pickle juice.

Yeah, it's good.

Yeah, I could see doing that.

Why not?

Where do you get a thing like that?

At a a bar?

Yeah, you just go, give me a pickleback, girl.

And the bartender's like, okay,

She came in there last week and drank a giant glass of milk.

But anyways.

Yeah, sure.

We've got all the various.

Like, do they have pickles at bars?

Sometimes they do.

They have a jar of pickles that,

you know, for

what are the ones?

Not Bloody Mary's, but

Caesars.

Yeah.

I guess maybe if you're at a Tapas bar, they'll have like various brines that they're keeping olives and peppers in.

Remember when Tapas like burst on the scene and everyone is like this is the new this is the new way we're enjoying it sort of it has become the way that every restaurant i like if i ever go to a fancy restaurant they're doing it tapas style they're like not it's not spanish food but it's like here's a small plate of

crab just a tiny plate of crab um

Have you been to any

we've got a fancy new restaurant just in the neighborhood.

And it's been, I realize it's been a long time since I've been to a fancy place.

I've been to like medium places, you know, that are like.

I don't think fancy, fancy exists here.

No, like...

Because you go to the fanciest restaurants I've ever been to in Vancouver, there's people in sweatpants.

Wow, that's our city sports.

That's what I'm saying.

Yeah, I feel like I had a drink at the bar in the Vancouver Club, and you're not allowed to wear jeans, and you're not allowed to wear sweats.

You have to be in proper attire to go and hang out there.

Where's that?

It's down on Hastings Street.

Right across from like Canada Place.

Yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Just like,

and it's, it's like an old,

you know, like you've seen in like Mr.

Big in Sex in the City, like a place he'd hang out at.

Yeah.

That's the place.

The place he hangs out at or the place he hides Carrie?

When's the new season coming out?

I don't know, but I can't wait.

I can't wait.

I started watching it as a joke, then I got reinvested.

Oh, did you really?

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, I watched it all.

Are you in on the new version?

I watched the first season, but I but the whole the whole like Miranda

storyline really just bothers me.

Yeah, no, I mean, the fact that they've uh they've just conveniently cut out Samantha completely from the show.

They could have had her appear in more scenes over the phone.

She could have been an element of the show.

She just didn't like working with Sarah Jessica Parker, I guess.

Yeah, I think they were fake friends on TV.

Yeah.

Yeah.

So episode one will have come out by the time this episode's.

Shut up.

Really?

It's back.

Hell yeah.

There's a whole arc where she broke her hip and then she had to get better in physio so she could wear high heels again.

What?

Yeah.

You got to watch it.

Oh my god.

Who broke her hip?

Carrie.

Oh.

Yeah.

And you get to see that stand-up comedian really develop.

See, that's the crazy part.

The stand-up is so bad.

Disagree.

I laughed and laughed.

I've modeled my new hour after her.

There's

she broke her hip.

Yeah.

Well, I know that when you like get a hip replacement,

they want you walking right away.

Yeah.

So they'll probably put you in those monolo balonics.

Yeah, if you have hip surgery,

I only realized this the other day that if you're cremated, that's what it'll still be good.

You could use that in another patient.

You just rinse it off and put it in somebody else.

Irma, my dog, who had her

CCL surgery, she's got a

thing in her leg now of whatever.

Can't take her through to the airplane.

Can't take her through security.

Dave, what's going on with you?

Oh, my God.

Heck of a lot.

Oh, yeah?

Well, we already talked about how we saw

we both saw the same movie.

Did you see it?

Friendship?

I was supposed to go last night, but it was sold out.

Oh, really?

Wow.

Only front row left.

I ain't sitting there.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So you're not.

Now you were going to go just up the street?

No, we were going to go to Scotia.

It's apparently like

this past weekend it was on in the States was on 60 screens in the whole country and it still came in seventh in the whole

like it made like if you compare what each

theater made, it

made twice as much as any other but you could tell me what

the number one movie in the country is.

I'd have absolutely no idea.

What do we think it is?

Thunderbolts.

It might be Thunderbolts.

Oh, I bet it's Final Destination.

Oh, sure.

Yeah.

Talk about dominating the box office.

Holy cow.

Why they stopped making them for a while.

I have no idea.

I think because the fifth one was

hard to disagree, but uh

the weekend uh that we just had

final destination then thunderbolts then sinners a minecraft movie the accountant to hurry up the accountant two really yeah oh wow and friendship at seven but only on 60 screens where all the others are above 2000 the uh the accountant i watched with my family and uh my brother's an accountant and we all race to make the same joke as soon as the movie's done.

Is that what it's like?

Is being an accountant?

Is it good?

No.

I've heard that it's like for that kind of thing, it's pretty good.

It's okay.

You got to really like Ben Affleck because he's in every frame of that movie.

I think we like Ben Affleck.

Yeah.

Yeah, sure.

I just wish him and Jennifer could work it out, you know?

Which Jennifer?

Whichever one.

Neither will do.

He looks so happy now.

Every time he gets away from her, he's like, smiling.

Yeah.

Then when he's with her, he's like, oh.

why do you think they got back together what did they think was

like what had changed in those years

i think they were really attracted to each other they're both attracted that's possible maybe he was just like you know when you're just one of those people who needs to blow up your life once in a while i feel like that's very ben athletic i think that's maybe jennifer lopez too yeah and like he there was a whole series of photos of him uh what does he bring in like dunkin donuts into some studio?

Oh, yeah.

Miserable and every single one of them.

Yeah.

Oh, he's the most

like

paparazzi.

Like,

his faces are so friendly to the paparazzi.

Yeah.

He's, i.e., that one where he's smoking and he's just like needs a breath.

Like, it's a meme.

His whole life is a meme.

Yeah.

He's staring out of the ocean.

He's got a giant tattoo on his back.

Oh, yeah.

Like, is it a Harry Potter tattoo?

No.

It's a dragon actually that could be a is there not a dragon in harry potter yes

um

it's uh yeah and then jennifer lopez

trying to find somebody better than jennifer lopez i mean she's

who is she was she dating diddy for a while yes is that right but they i i've been tick tock keeps being like here's what's happened on the diddy trial and i'm like i guess i'll listen but some guy was was like, was like, Diddy never did nothing to J-Lo because she had people on the blocks.

What is going on in the Diddy trial?

I haven't been keeping track.

So I guess trigger warning.

Absolutely.

This is the craziest thing: is that, so I guess before Prince died, he recorded,

he made a recording about Diddy and said to release it

when he

yeah, and it's it details like so many things that Diddy did about how he tried to react.

How he wore a raspberry beret.

He drove a little red Corvette.

He did a bad dance.

He confronted Diddy multiple times to be like, hey man, you're really creepy.

And Diddy would just be like,

Write a song about him.

Yeah.

No, we can get rid of people like you, like that type of thing.

Yeah.

And he did.

But Prince, he would have friends on the block.

I wouldn't be afraid of him.

Yeah, exactly.

Wouldn't Prince have

even more people?

Absolutely.

Generations of people on the block.

New power generations.

Is that his backup band?

Yeah.

Okay.

I'm not that into it.

I know the hits, but I don't know the history.

Have you seen Purple Rain?

I've seen Purple Rain.

It's very good.

Have you seen Under the Cherry Moon?

No.

Is that him again?

Uh-huh.

Oh, nice.

Okay.

Well, I got something to watch now.

Well, I'm going to read the reviews first.

Yeah, I haven't seen it.

Apparently, yeah, I read a review.

No, it's good.

Not good.

So, yeah, I went to see this movie.

Yeah.

It's a Tim Robinson movie, but it's an 824 movie.

And in your screening, did it take the audience a while to figure out what kind of movie it was?

Yes.

There was a lot of like.

At first, there was a lot of tittering.

A lot of laughing at everything tim robinson does yeah

and then i think we settled into

yeah the parts that are a24 not as fun

the parts that are tim robinson sketch style super funny super funny um it's yeah it's well worth going to but you're exactly right the audience was just like

so ooh this is gonna be so funny

they're hyped like it's uh

okay i've seen the first two naked guns now here's the third one

i remember being in the theater when liar liar came out and everybody in the audience was so key up for the comedy that like anything funny people lost their mind it was like very cathartic to be in a theater of that major trumpet williams in that yeah

he plays the second liar

it's him and jim carry

um

uh yeah have you ever been in a theater that's like a movie that's like a straight-up comedy because like i don't watch a lot of them in the theater, but I used to.

I've had that situation recently where a movie was so bad that the audience didn't know how to react.

It was like Craven.

Have you heard of Craven?

Oh, the Hunter?

And this movie is, I think it's Marvel.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Morbius style Marvel.

Yeah, it's connected to Spider-Man's

Madam Webb.

And I don't think they were trying to be funny,

but it was so bad serious that I was laughing so hard at certain parts.

And then people in the theater were also like, we gotta laugh too.

Yeah.

Can I hear that voice again?

What did the people in the theater say?

We gotta laugh too.

Excellent character.

Yeah, I saw the movie.

Oh, crap, what was it called?

The M.

Night Shadowmei.

Trap.

Oh, yeah.

And it's funny.

It's like, and he's not a guy who understands that some of his movies are very funny.

There's nothing winking about them.

And the whole movie served to be a launchpad for his daughter's career.

And now we all know her name.

What was it again?

A single name.

Yeah.

Let's say Desiree.

But let's.

I'm going to look up this movie Trap because I.

Have you seen it?

Yeah, I've seen it.

Isn't that the funniest?

It is so cringe.

It's just him.

Salika Knight as Lady Raven.

Lady Raven.

Yeah.

She's a good singer, but terrible actress.

Yeah.

And like, okay.

It's fine.

But yeah, it was in the theater.

There were teens behind me that started making jokes.

And I was like, this is the best.

I'm sitting right in front of who I should be sitting with in the theater.

Do you remember in the movie Taken?

Yeah.

He's saving his daughter.

And his daughter, at the very beginning of the movie,

Liam Neeson's ex-wife is now married to the super rich guy.

Yeah.

And the daughter lives there.

And he like brings a,

gets her like a karaoke machine for her birthday.

And

meanwhile, the super rich guy is like, you're going to meet, you're going to, I get you tickets to the whatever, this Lady Gaga, Lady Raven concert or whatever.

Or I guess a trip to Paris is what she gets.

Yeah.

And then at the end, Liam Neeson is like, I'm going to let you meet Lady Raven because I'm her security.

That's right.

Is that the first one or the second one?

I think the first one.

Because I know the first one, he rescues her, and the second one.

His wife.

His wife.

And then the third one, she rescues him.

The wife does?

No, the kid.

Maggie Grace?

Maggie Grace.

She saves the day.

She gets

a specific set of skills.

She does.

And here's how he helps her locate where he is trapped.

He said, okay, drop a grenade and then I'll like echolocation it in my mind.

Just keep dropping grenades.

And this is is in like a populated

like suburb, you know, like this is a city she's doing this in.

Do a save her dad.

How many thousands of people must die so that Taken can live.

That's his name in the movie, Jeff Taken.

Oh, I didn't know that.

It's true.

It's true.

The first one's quite good.

Yeah, the first one's great.

It kind of reinvigorated his career, and now he's going to be the new naked gun.

Yeah, that's right.

We've inherited a new.

Did you watch the naked guns?

I did.

Or at least the first?

I used to watch all the Leslie Nielsen movies.

Anything he was in?

Did you like them?

Or were you just like, this is just for kids?

I think when I was a kid, I liked them a lot, though I watched one like a few years ago and I was kind of like, okay.

Because he was a serious actor, and they would put him in the like...

That's why it's funny that they have...

Liam Neeson, because he's a serious actor, and they're putting him in a comedy role.

And then he was in so many comedies that they started just not writing him serious parts in these comedy things they would just have him be dracula dead and loving it or mr magoo or a men with brooms

or was he in no

i was gonna say dudley do right but that was brendan

frazier yeah he uh man he had a drop off uh but it's like he was doing nothing but blockbusters why would he do dudley do right was that what was the the sense that people wanted that movie from the Bullwinkle era?

Yeah, I don't well, they were remaking every like 60s thing in the 90s.

Yeah, that's right.

Brady Bunch was hilarious.

Down Periscope.

Sergeant Bilco.

Sergeant Bilko.

Was Down Periscope a movie?

Yeah.

TV show?

It was.

Oh, God, what's his name?

I just remember Harlan Williams in it.

Well, yeah, Kelsey Grammar's in it.

But was there a TV show it was based on?

It was called Mikael's Navy, I think.

And they had

to sit down Periscope.

Or maybe they made a movie called Mikhail's Navy.

And did they make a Car 54, Where Are You, movie?

I think they did.

Yeah, that makes sense.

All the Nick at Night

properties.

Madam's family.

My mother, the car.

Yeah, Bewitched.

I like the Bewitched movie.

It's Nicole Kidman, again.

Yeah.

Time after time, Nicole Kidman.

She comes through.

Yeah.

I can't think of a bad Nicole Kidman movie.

There, they said it.

That's even her like early days in Australia.

Great movies.

She's.

And I watched that show.

It's going to be a very good show

with

her and Lee Schreiber.

Oh, yeah.

What was that called?

Perfect Couple, The Perfect Couple.

Yeah.

And she's great in it.

And

then I watched, like, I read reviews afterwards.

And everyone was talking about

she has a different wig in every episode.

I didn't notice the wigs at all.

I've got terrible wig tar.

She has a wig in everything she does.

Is that right?

Yeah.

If you watch anything, I think like after 2000, like the 2010s, it's a wig.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I like that for even when he's had hair, Samuel Jackson had a wig guy.

So he wears a different wig in every movie.

I guess it makes sense that she would be wearing a wig because in her early movies, she's so curly-haired and hasn't been in 20 years.

Yeah, she's great.

Look, we're Nicole Kimmen Forward Podcast.

Yeah.

Who's had a career sustaining his wife?

Well, Tom Cruise.

Yeah, Tom Cruise here.

But what are they?

What is their connection?

Yeah, but she can wear heels now.

Was that a thing?

Because she would dwarf him.

She went on a talk show and they were like,

How's it different now that you're divorced?

Oh, what a scorch.

Wow.

Oh, boy, that's great.

Speaking of, I'm very excited for Mission Impossible 8.

Yeah.

Sure.

He's on hanging from a plane this time.

Sure, he's hung from a plane before.

Yeah, he's going in an underwater thing.

It's filling up slowly with water.

He's been underwater before.

What else do they do in the trailer?

Surely he drives off a cliff and something.

I mean, that was, I think, the Olympic closing ceremonies.

Have you seen any of the Mission Impossibles?

I've seen the first one like probably 20 times because it was my brother's movie he watched when he was a teen, but the other ones I haven't really seen much.

So you would sit there with your brother watching Mission Impossible and then he would sit with you while you watched Quills.

No, he did not watch Quills.

It's my movie.

Who's the Marquis DeSaud in it?

Is it?

It's Jeffrey Rush.

Yes, Jeffrey Rush.

Jeffrey Rush.

He had a run.

Holy cow.

Another Russian.

One of our great Australian actors.

That's true.

Who are the top?

Who's the else?

Is it

your brothers, your Hemsworth?

Hemsworth, sure.

Q Jackman.

Russell Crowe.

My God, they're everywhere.

Yeah, they are everywhere.

Louis.

We send them over, I say.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Fresh new Aussies is what we need.

Paul Hogan.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah, so that's what's going on with me.

I saw a movie.

I had popcorn in it.

Yeah.

I got a Coke and some MMs.

Do you like the popcorn over at Park?

I don't have opinions on popcorn.

I like all popcorn.

I've never had bad popcorn.

Oh, I find some places have staler popcorn than other places.

Yeah.

I like it when they make it fresh, but also I can't really tell.

I like seeing them, like, you know, the way they take that scooping device and they really kind of get in there.

But then I see like eight bags sitting there pre-packed.

I'm like, I'm getting one of those, aren't you?

Yeah.

Yeah, exactly.

Was the lineup long?

Because the lineup when I went was so long.

Well, I pre-buy my tickets and I show up two minutes before the movie.

And then they have popcorn waiting for you?

Oh.

That's what I mean.

Oh, the lineup for the concessions.

No, not for the matinee.

Mile long.

And it's,

you know what?

They don't, they won't turn the movie on if the line is still happening.

That's what the, that's the nice thing about a small theater.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah.

But like a regular theater, they don't care.

They just start where they start.

But like, well, it's true at the previews.

That's true.

There's 15 minutes of them.

Some of us have places to be.

Yeah.

There's

some great car commercials in there.

There's a commercial.

Oh, there was an ad.

So they, like, for people who don't know, Canada, there's a big nationalist, not nationalist, that has a new term, the patriotic

movement here in the country because

the

Cheeto-in-Chief

has threatened our sovereignty in in wanting to make us the 51st state.

And

so there's a big, like, pride movement in Canadian pride in all of our advertising now.

And before the movie, there was an ad for,

you recognize the voice and you're like, oh, it's Michael J.

Fox.

And he's reading this speech.

And it's for

real Canadian Superstore.

I didn't know that was Michael J.

Fox.

That's funny.

And then there's an ad for Molson Canadian, and it's got rush music playing in the background, and it's super patriotic.

And then there was a third ad that was like a combination of both of them.

It was Michael J.

Fox, again, for Real Canadian Superstar, but with a Rush song behind it.

Oh, nice.

Isn't Molson not, is that not Canadian?

I don't know.

It's so like.

The whole bi-Canadian movement is very confusing because

who knows what is made where, and there's Canadian

Canadian workers are making things for American companies.

And I don't know.

Have you given up anything American?

I've given up corn flakes.

That was my big contribution to the cause.

Now you have to have Canadian corn flakes.

Yeah, I have to get

made from Canola flakes.

I actually don't really think about it.

Oh,

it's

trader, trader.

Elbows up, man.

Yeah, it's a weird one.

Yeah, it is a weird one.

And

yeah, that's the one that I've liked.

Because I still have like Netflix and all that kind of stuff.

I know.

It is weird.

Like, people don't talk about it.

I shop at Netflix.ca.

Yeah, that's right.

Yeah, I shop at Amazon.ca.

Yeah, so it's fine.

Yeah, anyways, as you said, elbows up.

Welcome back to the country, Michael J.

Fox.

What's going on with you?

I am, as of this taping, I'm a couple days away from doing a 24-hour show.

So that means...

So thanks, everyone, who

came out and tuned in.

Turned it off.

Yeah.

Turned off.

Drop out.

Drop out, yeah.

That means...

I bought myself a new pair of shoes.

So you're going 24 hours.

How many steps do you get in in those 24 hours?

Probably like 13

because it's a lot of standing.

And And then, you know, maybe the trips to the bathroom.

You should wear a pedometer.

You know what?

I will.

I'll turn that on.

Like, you can do that on your phone, right?

I guess.

People wear the Apple Watch or Fitbit.

Yeah.

But

I use the Spank Bank.

I only use Canadian Spank Banks.

I've made the switch.

But the thing about me, oh, I hate buying shoes.

Oh, I hate it so much.

You like to thrift them.

I like to thrift them.

I like, look, I got wide, wide feet, wide feet for days.

And it's just like, either they don't have them in the width or they only have it in the ugly iteration of the shoe with the width.

But for standing for 24 hours, last year you got hokas.

I got hokas.

And those were,

I mean,

I

feel like part of the appeal is that they're ugly.

Like, there was an ugly shoe movement.

Wow, you hate hokas like I do?

I don't hate them, but like,

I only like the black ones.

I think the black ones look good.

Graham had black colors.

I hate the blacks.

Yeah.

But the ones that are all those, like, like, light pink, then bright green, then another pink, like, when they're all these weird colors.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I think they look very silly.

They look like something that a policeman would wear because it's they, they got to be on their feet a lot.

So I feel like hokas and hokas and

cab all hokas are.

I think if you go to a hospital, it'll be

doctors and nurses and hokas.

Do you think that they have to wear a particular kind of shoe as a police officer?

I guess so.

I think, yeah, they have to wear.

Don't they wear boots?

I don't know.

Nobody's ever let me watch them.

I feel like when someone is standing up for the police, they're not called a hoka liquor.

Yeah.

Yeah, so yeah, they're, they're good for anybody who's got to stay on their feet for a long, long time.

Police, I think they do like, they'll do a boot.

It's a steel-toe boot.

Everything police is like

reinforced.

Have you ever look in their

cop cars and you see their laptops that look like they're bulletproof?

I also love watching cops get into a car because they're wearing so much mess stuff like they have to kind of like crunch their way into their feet.

Their shoulder pads go up to their

ears when they sit down and there was a video of a drunk girl getting in the back of a cop car because she thought it would be funny and they were like well we're gonna arrest you yeah like sure yeah like that was fun what the hell do you think you're doing we'll just take you there you're already in the back we don't have to do anything oh um but yeah so hokas last year this year Hoka's.

Okay.

Went back to the devil I knew.

Do you go to like a

ergonomic shoe store?

I went to the ergonomic shoe store.

and this is the thing, is as discussed, I can't wear a cool shoe anymore.

Those days are behind me.

So now do I just go all the way?

Do I go all in and get like a dad-style hiking boot that's super good for your body?

Or like I feel like I'm not there yet.

Well, you know what you could do?

And

Carrie

Bradshaw and I agree on this.

Own multiple pairs of shoes.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I have other shoes, but

this is my everyday shoe.

I'm just walking around.

Have you tried New Balance?

Yeah, not wide enough.

Oh, oh, they go wide.

They go wide, but not enough.

Not enough.

Not for this guy.

And so I went into the ergonomic shoe place

with the current ones, and I was like, this please, another of this.

And then they were like, we don't have it in black.

And I was like, no sale.

Oh, no.

Yeah.

No sale.

Uh-uh.

And walked right out of that store.

Walked into another store.

Hocus, please.

Nothing.

We don't have it.

We don't have that size.

Third Porge, just right.

Tried them on in the store.

Easiest sale this woman's ever made in her entire life.

Yeah.

Guy comes in.

He knows what he wants, puts them on once.

Away he goes.

Did you go to that place that does hokas and hookahs?

Yeah.

I stayed there for a few hours and I tried some different tobacco.

This is like apple-scented.

But yeah, I'm a hoka man for at least another year.

And they wore out, man.

I wore those hokas out.

But like this time next year, are you doing another 24-hour show?

We'll see.

We'll see where the

birth, though, you'll forget the pain and then you'll do it again.

Is it

I guess there is that, right?

Is it painful

to do the show?

Like, is it a

like you're mentally flagging?

Yeah.

But are it and you're like, my back hurts, but is it?

How punishing?

The throat is the first thing to go.

You kind of lose your voice.

What do you do for that?

Lozenge.

Yeah, do lozenge.

Throat coat?

Do you do throat coat tea?

Oh, I would do.

I think maybe I will this year.

I was told by Alana Brittany Pasquas, who's a speech therapist.

Speech therapist.

You got to eat like regular hauls and stuff?

Garbage.

Bad for your throat.

So all honey lozenges is what I'm hitting during the day.

Okay.

You should get some of those progresso soup lozenges.

Do you not remember that?

No.

It was a hot topic a few months ago.

About a soup that was a progresso came out with

soup lozenges.

What do you are you talking about on April Fools?

They came out.

This was in cough and cold season.

I thought you were going to say cough and cold magazine.

Oh, yeah, centerfold.

Yeah, the leg standard.

Do you remember I sang?

Isn't that soup progresso?

I feel like that would be a good thing.

I have cooking soup and it's for dinner.

Yeah, where's Weird L when we've got this, like, we've got new pop stars, we've got fun songs.

I would love to, I'd love to hear his take.

He did one of those,

like when he does the Polka

medleys.

He did one of those in the last year or two.

God, he's great.

That had like Olivia Rodrigo.

Yeah.

And

why is there no heir to the Yankee Voic throne?

Who else is doing song parody?

Nobody.

He's the guy, right?

I mean, there's also

a lot of fun.

They write their own, yeah.

We're talking rewriting silly lyrics.

Used to be

every radio show had somebody that could do that.

A twisted tune on Rock 101.

We don't get spoojed again.

Maybe it could be you guys.

Could you come out with an album?

We are going to take it, see?

Just that easy.

And it's a topical song.

It's new.

But yeah, Hokas, Hokas, this year.

But they don't last.

They don't last the way that

a classic running show lasts.

they last the 24 hours yeah oh no but they don't last they last like for a year and then that's that's it if you're wearing it if they're your everyday shoe i am a cop and i do wear them every day they're not nothing's gonna last more than a year if you wear it every day you're right you're right just

i was bummed you know because they're not cheap for like an ugly shoe they're awfully expensive yeah that'd be funny if they're like well you get the ugly discount on them we know these look like they support your they're so good for your back and everything, but obviously, you know, no one's going to pay this price for them.

This is what you would pay for an attractive shoe.

I wonder,

as I get older, am I going to get wear like a hiking shoe?

A Meryl or something like that?

Oh, yeah.

A Mafisto.

Oh, yeah.

What if you got a Solomon?

Oh, sure.

Yeah.

Oh, those.

Those are in.

Those are techie, but they're, I don't know if they're comfy.

Yeah, no, I need a comfy.

I need like a.

They must be comfy every

fashionistas wearing them.

Fashionistas will wear anything uncomfortable for their art, you see.

But I wear the New Balance dad sneakers for the gym, and those are very comfy.

And

where was I going?

You don't know.

I have no idea.

But they look cool.

Yeah.

But I'm wondering in my life, how far away am from doing ski poles when I walk?

Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah.

I get scared about that, too.

You know how, like, like most old people die from falling over?

They don't.

I wouldn't say most do.

Well, three of mine did.

Yep, there you go.

That's 75%.

Yeah, 75% of old people die from falling over.

But yes, people die from falling over.

Is that the full statement?

No, like, like,

like when you're like, like the muscles, like, would you end up with ski poles if you had like really strong leg muscles?

I don't know.

Like, my dad is in super duper great shape.

But if they go for like a long walk in the hills, he's got the poles going.

Well, you know, I mean, pull them if you got them.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Well, I hope by the time I'm an old man, they will have invented some sort of legs that you can snap on.

And it does a lot of things.

it is sort of like it's the you know you if you when we were kids if you thought about an old person they would have a cane

but now i feel like the ski poles walking is a a way of

not having a cane and like feeling active and you wear the pants that zip off into shorts.

Yeah.

And you have a fanny pack.

You have a tilly hat.

Yeah.

But that's that's yeah, that's modern old person.

It's uh we'll see.

We'll see what the future holds.

Maybe hokas, maybe hokas stay with us for a while.

Are you having like a midlife crisis?

I don't think I'm gonna live to 80 something.

So let's say three quarters.

No, I just don't want to wear those poles is the thing.

I don't want to use those poles.

Well, no one's going to make you use the poles, but you'll fall down as three-quarters of old people do.

Yeah, no, and I can see myself being one of those people who falls and breaks their hip.

Yeah, well, it happened to Carrie.

That's exactly what she got.

Did she fall?

How did she break her hip?

Yeah.

Yeah, I think she fell.

Doing what?

Those little trampolines, you jump up and down to do exercise.

I can't remember.

I can't remember how she hurts herself.

It would make sense if she was getting a box of shoes down from her closet.

Yeah, that would be very in character, very on the nose, I think.

Maybe

two on the nose.

Google is suggesting when I search Carrie Brettra hip.

Hip replacement?

Did she get her hip hip replacement?

I think so.

Oh my God, that's much worse.

Well, no, it's not much worse.

I think a broken hip might be worse.

Hip replacement is you're in and out.

Yeah.

Hip dysplasia.

I think that's what like a French bulldog gets.

Hip injury.

How did she do it?

Well, I mean, but hip replacement, you can just get it from.

Bradshaw's journey to the starting line involved overcoming congenital hip dysplasia.

Yeah.

So she.

Oh, wait, no.

This is.

Who is this, Carrie?

This is Carrie Bradshaw, a marathoner from Houston.

Well, you can't, you can't.

You can't do that.

You can't have

the person.

You can't be named that.

Yeah.

You can't also be named Carrie Brad.

And also have hip stuff.

Because this is like when they do that thing at the end of a TV show, it's like characters or any similarity to characters.

This is right from the headlines.

This was purely cool.

Is it her hip?

Yeah,

I think it was her hip.

Not this scary bradshaw.

Who's that Carrie Bradshaw?

This is the character Carrie Bradshaw from Sex in the City.

Okay.

And the episode was called Tragically Hip?

That's pretty good.

I mean,

elbows up.

Absolutely.

Hip's up.

But yeah, she's back on top.

Miranda broke up with the stand-up comedian, so no more stand-up comedian on the show.

She has a podcast, too, in the farther season.

Miranda?

No, Carrie.

Carrie and the stand-up comedian.

I remember that.

But did you notice how Miranda wasn't herself?

Yeah.

Miranda used to be like really caustic, like very much like, this is my opinion.

Yeah.

And now she's not like that anymore.

What's she like now?

I don't have that opinion.

She's kind of like, eh.

She's like, I hate Steve,

even though Steve's done everything for me.

Yeah.

Can we hear the voice of the people in the movie theater again?

I forget what they said, unfortunately.

I guess I'm laughing.

Yeah.

So you've got these hokas.

Are there anything else you need to do to prepare?

I got to bring my rubber mat with me.

What's that?

Do you stand on it?

Yeah.

Like Tompa Tom Connors, like quiet stuff.

Yeah, and then I sign it and people hang it on the wall.

What's your rubber mat made out of?

That's a good question, but it's like not quite memory foam, firmer than that.

Sort of like a

sea cream.

Yeah, and it's like people use it who are like dishwashers and such.

Yeah, yeah.

So I use that.

And then I went to the physio and I just got to hydrate.

That's the big thing.

Hydrate because I know I'm going to lose my voice within the phone.

And you wear a diaper during this thing, so I never have to leave the stage.

I'm like, Corey Booker, is that his name?

The guy who did the live stream.

Oh, sure.

I was going to say soliloquy.

That's not right.

Filibuster.

Filibuster.

But he trained for that.

Did he wear a diaper?

He must have...

You're not allowed to.

Oh, I assumed you were allowed to have breaks.

No.

No.

Oh, no.

And he didn't.

It was something like he didn't eat leading up to it for like four days, and he didn't drink liquids for like a day or two before.

Do you think you would talk while you were peeing in a diaper?

Like, I would, like, how long can you pause during a filibuster?

I know I could because I've done it.

Like, if you're filibustering, you're like, and another thing.

One minute.

Like, are you allowed?

If you are quiet for 30 seconds, can I.

I'm going to do a shiver at the end.

You wore a diaper during a speech?

No, I was thinking about, I used to pee the bed when I was a kid and I had to wear a diaper.

Sure.

So I did as well, but we never, I think, I was a lost cause diaper-wise.

They were just like, we're going to ruin this bed.

That's going to be disgusting.

Yeah, I didn't think I was a habitual bed wetter, but now that my kids have like, when they were done with diapers, they never wet the bed again.

I was like, huh, I guess I was a bed wetter.

I guess I like once a year for until I was eight, maybe.

And it's like, it's uh it's panic because you're like, I don't know how to do the laundry.

I'm just a little kid, so you just either kind of sleep in it or

try and hide the sheets.

I don't know.

I can't remember what I did.

Or wake up, mom and dad.

Hey, mom and dad.

First sheet squeeze.

I would just make my bed and be like,

There's like flies buzzing around, like a Sims character.

That is pretty good.

For a kid, that's pretty ingenious.

I'll just make the bed.

That's fine.

Oh, maybe, I'm just looking at the topics in this Carrie Bradshaw article.

After consulting Dr.

Kugel.

Dr.

Kugel.

Dr.

Google, Carrie diagnosed herself with old ladyback.

Old ladyback.

Isn't Justin Dimberlake pretty?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Did Carrie have back pain or hip pain?

Carrie was diagnosed with a congenital birth defect of the hip.

What does that mean?

Well, it sounds like it was a birth defect.

Yeah.

It was congenital.

Why couldn't Carrie feel herself pee after hip surgery?

Well, because she was filibustering.

Right from surgery, right to filibustering.

Is it really possible to get back into your four-inch manoloblonic stilettos three months after surgery?

No, Jimmy Chews only.

Yeah.

And Samath makes an appearance.

No, yeah, in the last episode of the last season that was out.

So on the phone.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah.

Cool.

Yeah.

That whole thing didn't make sense, though.

Like Carrie was like, she chose money over me or something like, and it's like, no.

No.

That's weird.

They didn't write it cleverly at all.

Yeah.

Yeah.

But, uh, but then if you look back, I don't know how clever the whole series was.

True.

Anyway, tune in next week, folks.

I think we'll be starting to watch this show.

And Jam will be

having some new takes.

Some hot takes.

But what do you guys want?

You want to move to some Overheards?

I can dig it.

Okay.

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Overheard.

Overheard's a segment of the show where we hear things and we treasure them and then we hand them down through the generations.

And then when you get to hear them, we do, do we do that?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Overheard from your forefathers.

Are you sure about that?

You sure about that?

Yeah, okay.

We did it.

And we always like to start with the guest.

Randy, do you have an overheard?

I do have an overheard.

I didn't have any, so I asked my friends, and my friend Alex sent me this one.

So this is a sent-in one.

Yeah.

Sorry.

I always wear headphones.

I don't want to hear these cooks.

You just forget until the last minute that Randy Newair is a man's rights activist.

Randy spends all her time with Cuck.

She actually runs like a Cuck care home.

And they're like, Randy, can you help me with something?

And she's got her headphones off.

As you were.

Okay, it says, I overheard an Italian man, sandwich shop owner, refuse to make a parm for another Italian man, his customer, because it's speedo season.

You got to feed in that speedo.

You know, this is summertime's right around.

I'm not going to look good in a speedo this year.

I just realized.

Anyone looks good in a speedo.

A speedo is a great thing for anybody because

fat guy looks great in it, super shredded guy looks great in it.

Yeah, it is.

It's a universal darn.

But

I guess everyone in between doesn't look good at it.

But

big belly or small belly, medium belly.

No, no, no.

I need not apply.

Yeah.

Oh, boy.

I love a parm sandwich.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Can you find out where

what deli?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah, you really help us out if you could.

Dave, do you have a moment?

You're still holding your phone.

I do actually, after he said Italian men, I remembered I had written down one from the last time I went to Toronto.

Oh, they're full of Italian men over there.

Yeah.

I was walking down the street and I heard an Italian man man come out of a cafe and he said, they can't make the fucking coffee for the life of them.

Yeah, man.

Well, it's hard.

Is it hard to make a good cup of coffee?

No, I feel like I'm going to be able to do it.

If

an old Italian man comes over, I don't think I can do it.

No, yeah, that's true.

I don't think I can get it up.

I'm going to be one of these guys she's hanging out with.

I don't want to hear you, cucks there you go you're looking for a pill pull quote that is it yeah uh dave you have an over i was at the doctor yesterday oh classic and the doctor said no more monkeys jumping on the bed

a bride of

my monkey children who had all of them have you guys been on the bed they all had head injuries

uh so i'm in the waiting room and uh a medical assistant took this old man to before you go into I guess, for his appointment.

I've never, I've never been measured at the doctor.

Like height, you mean?

Oh, yeah.

I feel like they put you on the scale and then they have a metal thing they put on you.

Yeah, yeah, that's what he was doing.

And she took him over there.

I'm again, the doctor's never done it to me, not in my adult life, anyway.

And she measured him and she says, You're 178 centimeters, so 510.

And he he goes, I've shrunk two inches.

And

the medical assistant goes, unfortunately, I hate to be the barrier of bad news.

Losing a whole two inches, that puts you, yeah, in a completely different.

Oh, yeah.

All of a sudden, you're not a short gang.

My takeaway was that he was lying because he's like, I was six foot.

So even like in retrospect.

How guys lie about how tall they are by two inches by two inches yeah usually a guy will lie about by two inches really are you on the apps

yeah yeah and what's uh like

it feels like there's a lot of taller people than there ever was in my life i feel there's a like it's a taller population than it used to be i think it is actually though right our food yeah yeah that milk

those ads were like

drink your damn milk You'll be big.

I was at a party in Winnipeg, and everybody, it felt like everybody in the room was tall.

Like John Dore was one of them, and there were like three other guys.

Lachlan Patterson was one of them.

And these guys were all pretty tall.

And then this one guy walked in that was like pushing on like 6'10.

And he like, he had to duck his head coming in the door.

And it was like, now that's tall.

I was dealing with tall before.

And I literally had to talk to him like I was a kid.

Like, I had to chin up the whole time.

Yeah.

And when you dance with him, you put your feet on his feet.

I was in high school.

I, uh, my dad would measure me every time I damn asked.

I measure my kids every six months.

Like, it's your half birthday.

What does that mean?

I don't measure you.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

But they,

I remember being in high school, I, when I became taller than my dad, who's like 5'11, and then I eventually like got to six feet, never measured myself again.

And then like a year ago, I measured myself.

I'm now 5'11 and a half.

I'm shrinking.

Yeah.

How tall are you?

5'7.

5'7?

Yeah.

Nope.

I think I'm, yeah, absolutely.

Have you been on a date with somebody who is clearly not as tall as they had purported to be?

Yes.

Yeah.

Many times.

You show up.

Like, sometimes I'll go on a date with someone who put like five, nine, and then I show up and they're shorter than me.

And I'm like,

well, that doesn't make sense.

And they're like, I was using Russian math.

It's a different.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And then does that get brought up, or are you just like, this guy's like, I just, I don't really care about

that much.

But, but it's always, it's never someone where they had a good personality.

So we don't really have to worry about it.

Isn't it like a thing because

women will, I guess, people, I don't know.

We're all animals, man.

Yeah.

Well, just like, oh, five, seven.

No, no.

I don't know which swipe.

I'm swiping both directions because I don't know which is which.

Yeah.

On all the apps, is the swiping the same direction?

Is it?

No, you go left for no, right for yes.

Yeah.

Yeah.

But on all the apps?

Yeah, it's all the same.

Okay.

That'd be cool.

When I have my app, we're going to switch it up.

It's a prank app.

And how does that work?

Well, then you'll end up accidentally liking people

or like choosing people you use.

Oh, the thing is a prank.

It's not a swipe left or right for your favorite possible prank.

No, no, no.

It's like, oh, look at this gentleman.

Oh, I don't like him.

Oops, I went the wrong way.

Now he's going to, oh, and now we're married.

Oh, my God.

He's like the

least likely.

But I guess that's sort of how it works sometimes.

What would be a good name for like a wedding app?

It was just like, I'm going to wed the first person that I connect with.

Hmm.

Tinders.

Hinge.

It has to be a one-word

grinder.

Grinder.

Hmm.

Maybe like elope.

Elope.

That's good.

Yeah.

Because, yeah, E.

Yeah, that's good.

That's good.

Randy wins.

Yeah, I'm going to stop thinking of one.

Do you have it overheard?

I do.

And it was courtesy of going to see the film Friendship.

And there was, you know, there's some people that talk through the trailers and you're like super scared that they're just going to keep talking the rest of the movie.

And it was really, really packed.

So there was no chance of moving somewhere else.

And it's so great seeing a movie.

It's when it really packed.

Yeah.

It's like it's the first one I've been to for a while.

That was like the first weekend of it.

Anyways, there's a couple behind me.

I was scared they were going to keep talking.

But at one point, the guy was going to continue talking, and the woman that was with him said, we'll talk about Jamie later.

So I was like, ooh.

He's just ramping up to have a conversation about Jamie.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

We'll talk about Jamie later.

All right.

I'm so happy when there's people in the movie theater.

I'm so worried about movie theaters going away.

Yeah.

Did I, I like years and years ago, I went on a date with a woman who started talking during a movie.

I was like, this is.

Awful.

Like, I just pushed her.

I was like, well, this is not going to.

Do you remember the movie?

That's a great question.

It was definitely something something where you would have heard somebody talking during it so it wouldn't it looks like

the martin scorsese silence movie

um what was i gonna say i have good things to say too sometimes yeah always talking in the movies movie theater's going away and it's gone oh you know what it was it was uh

that movie theater in our neighborhood on sunday mornings yeah they rented out to a church yeah and they do um

services.

Righteous gemstones.

And

they,

but I just thought it was funny that the like Marquis still says, now playing friendship.

And I was like, that's something a church would say.

They change it to fellowship.

And also with you.

Yeah, I wonder if they utilize the screen in the old church service.

It's a big, big room to see.

They can show 70 millimeter cuts of God.

I was just thinking when we were talking about movies and them kind of going away from theaters, you know, there's like cardboard cutouts that you get your picture taken with.

And I was just thinking, how come there wasn't one of those for

clergy or whatever it was called?

What was it called?

Oh, Conclave.

Conclusion.

Oh, sure.

Where you get to sit in the middle of, yeah.

Anyway.

Will I be Pope?

Oh, they also showed a preview for like the 25th anniversary of Dogma coming out.

Yeah, that was weird.

And I was like,

this wasn't popular when it came out.

yeah this is

yeah i don't know why it's released but that movie rips

i remember liking it i love it but i don't understand why it's being re-re-released um maybe it's because uh it's very hard to find it on you can't find it on streaming anywhere so if you want to watch it you have to get a dvd so a lot of people haven't seen it to be honest i'll probably go to it Why not?

Seen it before.

Got that guy we were just talking about.

Ben Affluck.

He's the best.

Now we also have Overheard.

Overheard Smith.

Elandis Moore is that.

Does he play God?

Yes.

Yeah.

And George Carlin plays like a hobo guy.

He likes, I can't remember.

Is he a truck driver?

Apparently, he was like a clergyman.

Oh, yeah.

He's evil, I think.

Yeah, it was

the other movie.

Oh, this is

Kevin Smith doesn't like the church in this doctor movie.

But I know that he's like a priest or whatever, and

his wife had died, but he refused to take off his wedding ring.

Right.

Because he

was sad.

Even though a priest wouldn't wear a wedding ring.

Yeah.

Maybe I should watch that.

Maybe I'll.

Yeah.

You want to go together, Randy?

Yeah.

Okay.

Done and done.

Now, we also have overheard sent in to us by people all over the map.

You want to send one in?

And then

someone sent you one that was like, I saw, I heard the Italian guy at a

speedo season.

If you want to send one in, it's by at maximumfun.org.

This first one is from James B.

I was visiting my dad.

Oh, how?

Right?

I was visiting my dad in the rural east of England this week.

On the way, I stopped in a small market town for lunch in a branch of the bakery chain, Gregg's.

I love Gregg's.

Greg's.

Have you ever eaten a Gregg's?

Get a sausage roll.

Yeah.

Greg's.

I actually have never had that.

That is their big thing, is like sausage rolls.

Yeah.

They're sort of like, I don't know.

They're like a preteming that you can believe in.

Yeah, yeah.

They're kind of like the working man's pretty manger, I would say.

As I was leaving the shop, a family was walking past on the pavement, mom and dad, and a boy and a girl, around the ages of eight or nine.

The little girl clearly wanted to go into Greg's.

Why wouldn't you?

You're a little kid.

You want to get in there?

And was tugging on her mother's arm.

As I walked past them, I heard the mother say, No way, the last time I took you there, you got messed up.

Can't handle your sausage rolls, kid.

What is our equivalent here?

Cobbs?

Cobs.

Panera.

We don't really have Panera.

We don't really have Panera.

We're out in Toronto.

It's like a Menchees.

What's it called?

Moon Menche?

Menches is frozen yogurt.

Oh, no.

I'm thinking of fuck.

What's that place in Victoria?

So it's with an L.

Oh, merchies.

What is that place?

Is that that a place you can get tea?

Looks like that's a tea-ass place.

Yeah.

Have you been?

Did you see that Cobb's Bread?

Cobb's Bread, a great Canadian chain.

Elbows up.

I like their cinnamon scones.

Oh, yeah.

They do like a white chocolate raspberry scone as well.

It rips.

Yeah.

It rips like dogma.

But they had a campaign.

I would never get a bagel there.

Right.

But they have a they had a campaign that was like, do you say bagel or bagel?

Well, no one says bagel.

Maybe some people do, but that's not what it's called.

You say bagel or boggle.

You say boggle, which is like a Yahtzee?

Yeah, yeah.

It's a...

Is it the one with the?

No, that's sorry.

What's the one with the pop-up bottle?

Trouble.

Trouble.

But I think boggle was the one with like a bunch of letters that you shake up.

Yeah.

I don't know how I've played boggle.

Maybe.

Maybe.

It's just about Scrabble.

Yeah?

We haven't broken it out yet.

You have the.

Is there a dictionary that you use or just go online?

What's to challenge somebody?

I don't know what I would.

We haven't played yet.

Yeah.

You can buy the Scrabble dictionary, but I'm not going to.

It doesn't come with one.

No.

That would make it so much heavier.

And they're trying to ship these, Randy.

I mean, just like.

You know, a dictionary is a heavy thing.

Yeah.

This next one is for me.

That's what if I'm filibustering, I'm reading a dictionary.

He got through all the A's.

Fuck.

He's really here to...

He's doing it.

Oh, he got to the P's and now he's stopping for 30 seconds.

Just a moment.

This next one comes from Matt in Massachusetts.

And you think you'll still have your cough when you do your?

Oh, absolutely.

It's going to be a nightmare.

For context, I'm currently sitting in an Irish pub in Somerville, Somerville, Massachusetts, drinking a beer and reading a book, and couldn't help but overhear this guy at the other end of the bar say, yeah, but 9-11 basically gave us My Chemical Romance and Family Guy.

So, you know,

the one and two of culture.

Was the Family Guy reference a

fact that Seth...

McFarland was supposed to be on one of those planes.

Oh, I didn't even think of that.

Maybe it's the same with My Chemical Romance.

I'm sure there's an obvious reference to that that I don't know.

No, I don't.

But it might be somebody who just liked those two things.

Were you emo?

A little bit.

Yeah.

I went to Warp Tour.

I saw Mike Emma Coromance.

They ripped.

They ripped.

They got a handful of songs that ripped, man.

Yeah.

No, they're good.

American Dad or

That Family Guy.

I liked American Dad for a while there.

Then it got bad again.

But

there was a couple seasons where it was really, really actually quite funny.

And then I can't stand by anymore.

Did you watch American Dead?

I did.

In the beginning.

And what's you can do all the voices from it, right?

Yeah.

Okay, here we go.

Do Baby Stewie.

Do the weird alien.

Pretty good.

Pretty good start.

This last one comes from Jay from Los Angeles.

Jay's album up.

Nooches.

I took my son to the Renaissance fair yesterday.

We walked past a group of women who were on their way out.

One woman asked her friend if she had a good time.

She looked kind of disappointed and said, Yeah, but I said huzzah a lot less than I expected to.

Yeah, that's a big part of the Ren Fair experience.

Huzzah.

Ta-da, I feel like, is a big one.

Milady.

Milady.

My man.

You say gods instead of god.

Oh, yeah.

You get ads.

Yeah.

Zounds.

Would you ever go to a Ren fair?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Would you do the dress up?

Would you go the whole nine?

Yeah, that'd be cool.

It would be cool.

But then what do you do with that outfit the rest of the year?

Ren fairs aren't happening year-round.

You rent?

Yeah.

Yeah.

It'd be funny if all the costume stores ran out of rent fair and you had to go as like an astronaut or something like that.

Like, have you ever been to medieval times?

No, no, I know it, but I've never been.

They, I went when I was like 10.

Where are you from originally?

Peace rubber.

Okay.

But my parents took me to California when I was 10, and we went, and that was great.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Like, did it smell like horses?

Because I feel like that would be one of the side effects of kind of, but there's like what you're a delusional 10-year-old, so you're like, the prince is going to pick me.

And he does, and you're like, oh, this is wrong.

What the hell?

In addition to overheards that are written in, we also accept your phone calls.

Hey, you want to call us?

Oh, you can do it.

Or you can send us a voice memo.

And the way you do that is

you record yourself on your telephone.

And you send that file to spy at maximumfund.org.

Or you call us 1-844-779-7631.

Leave a voicemail.

That's one ugh.

Spypod1.

Like these people have.

here we go hey Dave and Graham and possible guest this is Rachel in Georgia

I am in the middle of taking a an online training on the use of AI

and

in the little introductory video I just watched the the woman who was presenting misspoke and said the word exacerbate instead of exacerbate

and

uh

yeah, you just have to think about it for a second and

enjoy.

Thank you.

Exacerbate.

Exacerbate.

Watching.

Do you guys know anything about AI?

I feel like I'm late to the game AI-wise.

I know it makes the coolest

v visuals.

Yeah, yeah.

A whole new generation of garbage pail kids.

I know that there is a

like students now just use just it's completely

they don't even consider it cheating.

Like why wouldn't I just use ChatGPT to write my essay?

Yeah.

I mean I've surely back in the old days I stole everything from a Cole's notes version of a book or

something.

But you had to actually write that out by hand.

It was a different time.

I asked

ChatGPT,

I said, can you give me some outfits for someone with no curves?

And then they

just gave me the worst outfit.

Pictures of olive oil.

It's funny.

That's really funny.

Anyway.

I just, I think I said when I was

on the radio for like a year.

And one of the bits that I did was get ChatGPT to write me jokes.

And one of them I asked him, asked him, asked it to write me a joke about Justin Trudeau's divorce.

And it said, I cannot do that.

Oh.

So great.

Justin's a friend.

Yeah, so that's got a stronger moral compass than I do.

Yeah.

Here's your next phone call.

Hey, Dave Graham and esteemed guest.

This is Paul from New Jersey with an overheard of the Kids Say the Darndest variety.

My five-year-old daughter is a very slow, picky eater.

And one morning, my wife was trying to hurry her through breakfast so she could get ready for school when I caught this exchange.

Mommy, why do I need to eat breakfast?

Well, honey, it's so you could have energy for the day and you know that it will help you grow big and strong.

Hmm.

Mommy, I don't want to get big and strong.

I think I need to enjoy being a kid.

Anyway, off I go.

Off to Chuck E.

Cheese, you go.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Wow.

Did you know that?

That was cute.

Just cute.

The kids do say that yeah, they do say the darnest thing, but it stressed me out this person was trying to get get out the door and get the kid to eat yeah the picky eater and rushing them through breakfast and the slow eater is like how many courses are you giving this kid

Finish your fifth course

You don't need

bacon eggs a part of a complete breakfast.

You just need something Yeah, something anything will do.

Yeah.

What do you have for breakfast?

What did I have for breakfast?

Both

banana and some cereal and some other fruit to be remembered later.

What did you have?

I think I had an egg muffin.

An egg muffin.

Nice.

Like an egg McMuffin?

Similar.

But legally not similar.

Yeah, but

trademarked.

I got there after 10:30 and they stopped serving it and

I fell down.

I had apple and yogurt.

Nice.

All right.

The balance.

Hello, Dave and Graham.

This is Rob from Jacobtown, Pennsylvania.

I work in government, and the other day I was meeting with someone, and they were not ready yet.

And so they sat me with their assistant.

And I was talking to the assistant, and he was asking me, he was like a young guy, he was asking me about

my career and how I had

gotten the job I had.

And then he asked me,

he said,

so what would you do if you didn't work in government?

And I said,

I don't know.

What would you do if you didn't work in government?

And he said,

I'd like to own Amazon.com

or Tesla.

So if he wasn't in government, he'd be one of the two richest guys in the world.

All right, thanks.

You have to have a fallback plan.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I'll do this job.

If not,

I'll invent Microsoft.

Yeah.

I think I would like to be a pharaoh building pyramids in my honor.

I'd like to be Anna Nichole Smith in the 90s

after he's dead.

Who's it?

Yesterday there was a news story about a guy who's with a 20-year-old.

Oh, boy, who is he?

Anthony Keatus?

No, his is 19.

A young 19.

She's girl's more mature, but

oh man, I'm going to forget who he is, but he's an old gargoyle-looking guy.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Love that kind of stuff.

Yeah.

You know, if you got money, what good is it if you can't?

You can't take it with you.

Yeah.

That's right.

So give it to somebody else.

So go be a creep.

Yeah, go be a creep.

You don't get one chance.

I got a rule.

The brain's got to be cooked.

It's got to be cooked before I'm getting near'em.

What age does your brain stop cooking?

I think it's 27 or 26.

Okay.

Okay.

I know that you have a drumstick and your brain stops cooking.

Watch it X Files with no lights on.

We're done lamaise on.

I hope the smoke agrees with this one.

Did you hear a song that they did about being canceled?

No, did they get canceled?

No, oh, okay, was it self-referential?

Like, yeah, because wasn't there a whole thing that they got canceled and then they became famous?

Oh, for the using the name Bare Naked Ladies, yeah, oh, sure.

I thought one of the lead singers did something weird.

No, he did cocaine and he got kicked out.

Yeah, he got arrested for

naked somewhere.

No, these are bare-naked ladies, they remain clothed, though.

Well, I don't, I don't know.

They had two lead singers, it's those bands never work out.

You just know one of them is evil.

Well, that brings us to the end of this episode.

Randy, tell us what you want to plug.

Where can people find you online?

The new wave of stand-up.

Yeah.

You can find me on

CBC Jam.

CBC Jam.

You can find me on Instagram at Randy Noodle.

I post

two E's.

Two E's, Two O's.

And I post these things called these videos.

They're vlogs.

They're called In the Day of the Life of a Female Comedian.

So you can check those out.

Very funny.

Thank you.

And I have an album called Bad Baby, Bad Baby 2 coming soon.

Yes, yeah.

And then you said you're going to name them all in The Course of the Bad Boy films.

So the third one is, you know,

Bad Babies for Life.

Yep, Bad Baby for Life.

Fourth one, Ride or Die.

Bad Baby Ride or Die.

Nice, nice.

Well, thank you so much for being our guest.

And thank you, everybody out there, for listening to the show.

If you haven't seen Bad Boys Ride or Die, this is the week to do it.

Come on back next week for another Episode of Stop Podcast yourself.

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