EP.254 - JESSICA KNAPPETT WITH MUSIC FROM DAUDI MATSIKO LIVE @ YORK THEATRE ROYAL, 2024

Hey, how are you doing, podcasts?

It's Adam Buxton here.

Sorry for the cold open.

There's no regular opening theme this week because it's a live podcast episode.

This is another one from last year's tour recorded in May 2024 in front of a sold-out crowd at the Theatre Royal in York and featuring friends of the podcast, British actor, comedian, writer Jessica Nappett, Nappet, and British Ugandan musician Dowdy Matsico, with whom I performed a live, folky version of the intro theme.

So let's travel back in time and hear that beginning section before I rejoin you from this quite wet and windy Norfolk farm track in late July 2025.

When I'll tell you a bit more about the podcast and say more of a proper hello.

But first, back to York 2024 and my tediously inevitable inevitable Jules Holland impression.

When will I stop doing it?

To help me sing the Adam Buxton podcast Intro Jingle, please welcome to the stage.

Welcome to the stage, a marvelous musical talent

all the way from the beautiful city of Nottingham.

Please welcome Dowdy Matt Seeko to the stage, ladies and gentlemen.

Dowdy.

Dowdy

is not only going to be my house band tonight, he's going to help me sing a couple of jingles, but he's also going to sing one of his own numbers a little later on in this first half.

Are you still Nottingham-based, Dowdy?

Sort of.

Sounds like a no.

Whereabouts are you?

Little Taukon, Newark-on-Trent.

Oh.

Yeah.

Direct train.

Perfect.

Pretty good.

Good journey today.

Smooth.

I sat next to a very twitchy guy.

He was a young guy.

He looked a bit like an ex-army guy or something.

And he was quite hench.

He was looking at

other hench men on his phone.

His henchmen.

I can relate to all of them.

And he kept on sort of doing twitchy exercises.

Then he put on some surgical gloves.

This was a packed train from Norwich.

And

then he raised his arm like this to do some exercises.

And I got a waft of some very powerful body odor

right next to me.

But he was twitching away the whole time.

God bless him.

And just sort of looking around and just not being relaxed and acting so much like someone who was going to kill everyone.

It was very unrelaxing.

And then I thought, Buckles, stop judging this smelly, dangerous guy.

He's probably a sweet person.

Why not just chat to him?

But then luckily we got to Doncaster and I didn't have to and then I checked.

So how are you feeling about singing a classic intro jingle, Dowdy?

Pretty good.

Now, podcasts, I hope you're going to join me and Dowdy, especially in the section that goes, I'm a man.

And just try and think of it as a non-gender-specific bit of

musical chanting and then we'll get going in good vocal style.

Alright,

here we go.

I added one more podcast to the giant podcast bin.

Now you have plucked that podcast out and started listening.

I took my microphone and found some human folk.

Then I recorded all the noises while we spoke.

My name is Adam Buxton, I'm a man.

I want you to enjoy this.

That's the plan.

Oh,

it's sweet.

Pretty tender.

Dowdy Matsiko.

Hey, welcome back to late July 2025 out here on my regular Norfolk farm track and I'm here with Rosie today even though she is not absolutely thrilled to be out on quite a dreary

evening.

It's a bit better than it was earlier today.

It was really chucking it down I would say.

I hope things improve over in Southwold not far from here for this weekend's latitude festival.

I'll be there at various points doing a bit of DJing at the disco shed on Friday night at 9.30

I think probably clashing with Sting.

Maybe I'll get to see the last half an hour.

Anyway, I'm looking forward to DJing

and then I'm appearing at the listening post tent on Sunday afternoon at 2 p.m.

I'll be talking to Guy Garvey of Elbow.

We're just going to have an informal chat, kind of him interviewing me a little bit.

as well as me asking him some questions but I'll be talking about my album and music in general.

And I'll be performing a couple of tracks from the record, Buckle Up, that is, along with my producer,

who also happens to be the mastermind of metronomy, Joe Mount.

It'll be pretty much the first time I have ever performed a song that I've written in public.

And there's no telling which way it's going to go.

If you're not at latitude, you can still hear the results because the show will be recorded and released as a podcast for Virgin Radio.

They're doing various bits and pieces at latitude this year,

and my

slot is one of them.

And speaking of great, great music, I've got a new single out this week, I think.

I'm really very vague on all this, but I'm pretty sure that a new track from my album, Buckle Up, is going to be available to listen to from Friday.

It's called Doing It Wrong.

Available from,

I don't know, wherever you get singles these days.

It's a song that started life as the theme tune for a Radio 4 show I did a while back.

That show was called You're Doing It Wrong.

It was about alternative lifestyles.

And anyway, I always liked the way that the theme tune I made turned out.

So me and Joe Mount have turned it into something very special.

Think LCD sound system

and talking heads heads meets a toddler with a toy keyboard.

See what you think.

Doing it wrong.

I made it for you.

It's sort of about trying to be a good person,

but going on the internet and finding that you're doing it wrong.

But now it's back to last year, 2024, and my live podcast chat with the brilliant Jessica Nappett.

Quick reminder of a few Nappet facts.

She was born in Bingley, West Yorkshire in 1984.

She's an actor, comedian, writer, singer, as you will hear, a brilliant singer, mother and wife of American filmmaker Dan Crane.

She's the creator and star of the sitcom Drifters, one of the stars of Romesh Ranganathan's TV comedy drama Avoidance.

She's the survivor of a dramatic stage fall on Taskmaster.

And most importantly, she is a friend of the podcast, having appeared in episode 223 early last year, a great episode.

And just a couple of months later, she joined me on stage in York to talk arguments and couples therapy, a subject that we'd started to waffle about backstage that day, I think.

There was also more music from Dowdy Matt Seco, who helped me perform another podcast, Jingle, halfway through the podcast.

And he also played the title track.

from his critically acclaimed album The King of Misery, released in early 2024.

Incidentally Dowdy is playing a show at London's Dalston Curve Garden on August the 12th.

You'll find a link in the description so if you enjoy his music here do go along and support him.

Now for the second half of the live show in York last year Jessica asked if she could turn the tables and make me the guest on what was then her new podcast, Perfect Day.

She'd only recorded a few episodes at that point.

She continues to make it.

As I speak, she's just uploaded episode number 54 with comedian Rhys James.

And the conversation in the second half of this podcast about my perfect day is an edited version of what appeared in episode 13 of Jessica's podcast, Perfect Day.

which I think also featured some extra waffle from that night which we recorded in kind of a tiny cupboard backstage after the live show as the audience were filing out.

But I thought I would include some of that stuff in this episode and Jessica was fine with me doubling up a little bit, especially as hers went out last year.

I thought, you know, if you hadn't heard Jessica's podcast, you might enjoy it and it might serve as an introduction to the rest of the Perfect Day archive.

Link in the description.

It was the first time, I think, on stage that night that I'd spoken about a few family moments that actually ended up in one of the chapters of my book I Love You Bai

and in case you're wondering I do check with my family and ask if they mind me writing about them and talking about them in public although even if they object I go ahead and do it anyway.

That's a joke as I hope my family would tell you.

Back at the end to say goodbye and give you a Edinburgh fringe recommendation and indeed a recommendation for a talented pet portrait artist who recently gave me a beautiful painting of Rosie.

But right now, after the regular ramble chat jingle, let's head back to the Theatre Royal in York in May 2024, where Jessica Nappet is about to arrive on stage, towering above me in a beautiful blue dress with white polka dots and high-heel white boots.

Here we go.

Ramble chat, let's have a ramble chat.

We'll focus first on this, then concentrate on that.

Come on, let's chew the fat and have a ramble chat.

Put on your conversation coat and find your talking hat.

Right now, Jessica Nappet

best guest.

Hello.

Hello, you.

How's your mic position there, Jessica?

I think it's okay.

Yeah, it looks pretty good to me.

If you're happy, I'm happy.

Oh, I'm so happy.

I couldn't be happier to see you.

It's very exciting to be with a tall, glamorous woman on a stage.

And for me, too.

I had to really get on tiptoes to give you a hug there.

I know, Hannah.

This is an encapsulation of my relationship with my wife.

I do have a special microphone that enables me to say my wife.

My wife.

That's the my wife mic.

But, you know,

this is my whole life is that I'm tinkering on silly things on my computer, things that don't really matter in the bigger picture.

So is this sort of like your kitchen table then at home?

Not dissimilar.

And then my wife comes in, yeah, a little bit.

My wife comes in, she's taller than me as well.

In fact, she's kind of the same height that you are.

And so I have to stretch right up.

She very seldom bends down for me.

It's just occurred to me.

I don't think I bent down for you either.

No, you didn't.

No, quite right.

Do you want want people to bend for you?

You want people to bend the knee?

Yes.

I do want a bit more knee bending.

Do you?

Yeah, a little bit.

Hey, look, how are you doing?

How's life since we spoke?

Um, really good, actually.

Do you know, it really good?

Because

I had a really nice response to being on your podcast.

And genuinely, it did change my life a little bit.

I'm not joking.

Oh, mate.

It was such a lovely experience.

How come?

How come?

Because I talked about things that I had never talked about.

I got a bit vulnerable.

I talked about the feelings.

And talking about your feelings is good, even if everybody hears them.

And

people got in touch with me and said, hey, Jess,

it's all right.

You don't need to worry about feeling like your sitcom that you made was shit.

It wasn't shit, and we didn't say that.

No, No, no, I didn't say that.

But it was all those sorts of things.

Yes, anxiety.

And

it felt good.

Yeah, and

also then I came away from it thinking that I need to sort of do some more things out there in the world.

Yes.

Well, I want you to do those things.

That's why I'm doing a podcast myself.

Yes, you're going to do a podcast.

Yes.

Now, hang on one second, Jess.

It's just been pointed out to me by my producer, Seamus, who is here.

Hi, Seamus.

In the wings that I've got live at the Bristol Beacon written on

we feel special don't we York

just cut and paste the next location we don't care we're just a cut and paste job to you aren't we I mean a little bit yeah but uh

you know what it's so nice to be here the Bristol Beacon

what a very unpleasant and aggressive audience it is

anyway it's nice to be here.

But I'm so glad that it was overall a pleasurable experience.

Any negative pushback from appearing on the podcast?

No, no negative pushback from the podcast.

Okay, good.

No.

Nothing from the production company who did Drifters.

No!

No!

No, good.

And I'm working with them on something new anyway.

Oh.

Oh.

Are you able to say anything about that or is it too early?

It's just early days, but it's about me and my American husband moving back to Yorkshire.

Oh, wait,

good one.

A fictitious thing, like a narrative thing, or a

documentary series.

It's not a doco.

No, it's not a reality TV series.

Although, that, no, not really.

Would you ever do something like that?

If I had to, yeah.

Yes.

If they wouldn't make it as a scripted thing, and that was the last thing left to do, yeah.

What about you know, I always used to watch the Richardsons and things.

Yeah, that, yeah.

I admire the strength of that relationship that they can have,

that they can have all that banter on screen.

Because I do think so much about my relationship with my wife and how it permeates the podcast in a far more low-key way.

Obviously, she doesn't appear on the podcast, but she's referenced quite a lot.

She's got her own catchphrase.

She's got her own mic, yeah.

But I also worry that it's a bit offensive in some way to her that she's maybe not telling me about.

And it'll all just bubble out.

One day you'll just get served the court papers.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah, I know.

I feel as because I

love my husband so much, but I do slag him off for a laugh.

Right.

A lot.

But he says he doesn't mind, but then, yeah, I do.

Sometimes I think, you sure you don't mind?

Do you slag him off in public?

Yeah, on television, yeah.

Right.

Yes, because I mean, he's sort of perfect to be slagged, really, because

he's American.

Yes, exactly.

Also, he's a robust character.

He's very good-looking.

He's a fine man.

He's a good singer.

I was at your birthday party.

You did karaoke, and you absolutely smashed it.

You were like a sort of super couple of karaoke.

It was mad.

But he was.

But you kicked off.

Adam kicked off the karaoke very bravely.

Well, it was actually Rockyoke.

We had a whole band.

Right.

And then they said, someone's got to start.

And they looked out in the audience and they immediately recognised and They went, Adam Buxton, you'll do it.

And then you sang, um, I sang Daydream Believer by the monkeys.

Daydreamdam Believer.

What a great start to a party.

Adam Buxton singing Daydream Believer.

I don't know.

I don't know.

I mean, I just didn't want to make a big deal out of it.

You know what I mean?

Like, I didn't want to do it.

Didn't you?

No.

Can I name drop some of the people that were in the crowd?

If you want.

There was Phoebe Waller Bridge was there with her husband, the the man.

What's he called again?

Martin McDonough.

Martin McDonough, the director who did Banshees of Inner Sharon and In Bruges and all these kind of things.

I'm a big fan of both of those people.

So it was really quite intimidating to look out there and sing, cheer up, sleep, begin.

Martin McDonough's taking notes for his casting session.

Well, Phoebe Waller Bridge is giving me the breaking the fourth wall stare.

Yeah.

I didn't realise you were quite such a good singer.

Maybe later on, towards the end of the show, perhaps, I might convince you to sing a thing.

Okay.

Okay.

Well, maybe.

Well, we'll see how

should we feel the vibe?

Should we read the room?

They might hate that.

Read the room.

They might hate that.

That's a new concept to me, reading the room.

Okay, we don't have to.

Normally, I don't have to read the room because I'm just sat in a.

Because you're a man.

you don't have to.

That is true, though.

Men don't read rooms as well as women.

I really think that's true, right?

Well, I guess we were talking earlier, actually, about arguments.

Oh, yeah, yeah, let's go back.

Let's row back to the arguments.

Yeah, row back to.

Now, for your birthday, I gave you a gift.

Oh, you did.

So nice.

By the way, Adam and I had never met until I went on his podcast.

Is that right?

No, we had met.

We'd met once once.

Oh, yeah, on Richard Herring's podcast.

No, I auditioned for your sitcom and I didn't get it.

Dodged a bullet, mate.

Dodged a bullet.

Oh, yeah, so Adam and I became sort of like really good friends just from me going on his podcast.

Is that fair to say?

Yeah, I just knew it was going to work, and then as soon as we started chatting, I enjoyed it.

You didn't know it was going to work.

I did.

I've been doing this for years, and you've never invited me on.

And I don't know why you decided to invite me on, but you know, 2024 was the year.

I think I decided to invite you on during the lockdown when I saw you on Travelman.

Oh, really?

And I just thought she's great, and I think this will be really fun to talk about.

Okay, well, that's nice.

But we had met very briefly.

And then, anyway, I invited Adam to my birthday party a few weeks after we had hit it off because Adam then had asked me to do this gig.

And he got me a very nice birthday present.

Very, very nice.

Do you want to know what it was?

It was a beautiful leather-bound book, beautifully wrapped in tissue paper, and on the front of the leather-bound book, in gold embossed writing, Arguments with Husband Log.

It is full already.

Do you think you might ever use it?

Oh, yeah.

Yeah, I actually have one brewing.

The argument with wife log

is something that I started a while back,

and

it started out as a joke, and then it sort of became real

because it was something I would do occasionally.

And now genuine arguments do go into the log.

But then you were surprised by a technique that I deployed in quite a heated argument.

This was a while ago.

But a few years ago, I remember we had an argument that went to DEF CON 1 quite quickly.

And

it was one of those ones that was just getting way out of control, and people were saying things that it's like, wow, you're saying that.

But what do you, what?

So, what's DEF CON for you, though?

Like, how bad does it get?

Because

I think some people think they're having a really bad argument.

I'll sometimes say something to my husband and he'll go, stop yelling at me.

And I'll think, I haven't even raised my voice, mate.

You'll know when I'm shouting at you.

You'll know when I'm fucking angry.

Right now, I'm calm.

You know, that's my kind of vibe.

Well, do things ever get to, what's the worst it ever gets around at your gaff?

I've thrown a pan.

Oh, yeah.

Thrown a pan at him.

But the problem with being married to an American is, yes, you throw one pan, you find yourself in couples therapy.

And then you really have to talk about your feelings.

That's the problem.

Did you throw it at the wall?

No, I threw it at the ground.

I didn't, genuinely didn't mean to hurt him.

I threw it at the ground, but it bounced and it hit his leg.

Oh, okay.

I was just in a rage.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And then did he make a big deal out of it?

Ah, my leg, you cut my leg.

Yeah, I mean, he did like had to get a plaster.

Oh!

Well, it was just like, it just bounced.

Like, I genuinely didn't mean to hurt him, or I wasn't trying to hurt him.

But then we had to go to couple therapy, and then he had to, he was like, tell her what you did.

Oh man,

and then so I said it, and then she kind of thought it was funny.

And I was like, I'm on to some, I'm on to a winner here with this one.

But the problem with the, I don't, have you ever been, have you ever done that?

Couples therapy, no, I've suggested it a few times.

Have you?

Yep, not recently, I would hasten to add, but I also heard a lot of stories from friends saying, don't go to couples therapy unless you want to get divorced.

Yeah.

So what would your.

Well, I know, know, I'm not divorced yet.

No, I think it's good, but we basically two things happen because we've been we've done it twice.

The first time we did it,

she said that we had to start every sentence.

If we felt that we had something to complain about, we had to say, we had to make it about our own feelings.

We had to say, I feel

that

you wanting me to stack the dishwasher in that certain way is

an overreaction.

And so, so he had to say, I feel.

But then what happened was basically any time he went,

hey, babe, so

I feel, and I just go, what?

You feel what?

And so it just, it made me like, every time I heard him say those words, I was like, here it comes.

So it didn't really work because it just triggered me.

So we stopped seeing her.

And then we went to see another lady when we moved to England, but moved back to Yorkshire.

And she, and basically, what happened happened was: sorry if she's in the audience, I hope she isn't.

She was a really nice person, but

she basically just became a person that we slagged off behind her back together.

So she brought it in that way, it was good, yes.

But she taught us this special way of doing things where we had to like face each other

and you had to say a thing, and then the other person had to repeat it back so that you've been heard.

Oh, and you had to be really clear about what was bugging you, so you had to like be concise.

So I'd say like,

when you drive, it makes me feel unsafe.

When I drive, it makes you feel unsafe.

But I would probably say

when I drive, it makes you feel unsafe.

Yeah.

But then, so she, I think, I can't remember if she was South African or Australian, but she'd then prompt you and she'd go, you'd, she'd go, did I get you?

And then you'd have to go, did I get you?

And then she'd she'd go, and then she'd go, Is there more?

And then you'd have to go, is there more?

And then, so basically, like now, whenever somebody says something annoying to the other person in our relationship, the other person, we always go, did I get you?

Is there more?

And it's just become like a running joke, and now we can't go back because it's just ridiculous.

And you're closer than ever.

Job done.

Yeah, it was quite, it was good in a way, I suppose.

Well, the thing that you balked at when I mentioned it earlier on today was that when we went to DEF CON 1, and to answer your question,

I suppose there is shouting sometimes.

There's loud shouting, like top-volume shouting.

Really?

From both of you.

Yeah.

Imagine you shouting.

But only, only like just the one shout, not sustained.

You know what I mean?

It's like the one shout, and then it's like, whoa, I use my outside voice.

and that usually spells the end one one or other does the walk out in high dudgeon oh right so you shout and then you walk away walk away slam and then sometimes she calls after

that's right walk away

and then the challenge is to resist the temptation to go in for a

another

helping.

Yeah, do you sometimes follow each other around that?

Because I've got into that thing where the other person walks away and then I'll follow him.

Yeah, go back into the room.

And by the way,

can I just say I feel

when we got to that point this one time, I thought, okay, this is a good bit of psychology.

And I got my phone out and I said, okay, look, I think this is getting out of hand.

I'm going to record this conversation.

Insane.

You cannot get a micro.

You can't start recording

to settle an argument.

Like, what good do you think is going to come of that?

Because then you become more aware of how you sound.

It's like those posters that want to stop abuse of staff on the railways.

Do you remember?

And there was a campaign that said, if only you could see how you look when you get so angry.

You know what I mean?

If you could step outside yourself and have a sense of how you sound, how you're coming across, then it might chasten you somewhat.

Right, but in the moment, that's not happening, is it?

Because in the moment, it's just going,

and it's just recording, it's not playing back until after the event.

No, I know, but I thought it might give her a sense of what she would sound like when she was played back when I played it back on the podcast.

You didn't?

No, I never did, but I it was partly in my head.

I was like, Yes,

hopefully, this will calm down the argument.

Also, might be good for a podcast.

We should take a break, but before we do that, I would like everyone to welcome back to the stage Dowdy Matt Matseko.

Here's Dowdy, and Dowdy is gonna play us a song to conclude the first half.

What's this one called?

It's called King of Misery.

There you go.

Yeah.

So I made this record

called The King of Misery, and

I'll just cut to the chase.

So this song, I tell myself to fuck off

in a really kind way.

I think the records about depression and

bipolar and just some stuff.

And

I was wondering, would you guys be up for singing Fuck Off with Me?

I feel like we can put some of our own experiences into that moment.

How shall we fuck off, Dowdy?

Gently and up the major scale.

Yeah.

So

it just sounds like this.

Something like that.

So, like, should we try it together?

Sure.

Alright, so

fuck

off.

Nice.

Bit more energy

against myself.

It all ends

in embarrassment.

I haven't

got the strength to end

the conversations in intent.

I've come to

watch the house burn down

home

again.

You called me

the king of misery,

but I don't

think that's who I am

with a chest made

of sinking sand.

Well, I'm doing

the best I can.

If I could describe you in a sentence,

I'd say you oppressed.

If I have to wear you on my sleeve again,

I will get undressed

if I have to drag you through another day.

I'll have no strength left

dear voice inside

telling me lies.

The guilt that eats me,

that leaves me tired

The words that beat me

Divo is unkind

Dim me sometimes

Far

off

Far

off.

Far

Dowdy Matsico.

Thank you very much, Dowdy.

Well done, everyone.

Dowdy, would you like to come and join me once again and help me sing

a jingle?

Thank you so much for being here, Dowdy.

It's lovely to have you.

Oh, it's a pleasure.

Now, we're going to sing halfway through the podcast.

Do the beautiful mellow guitar version.

All right, let's do it.

We're halfway through the podcast.

I think it's going really great.

The conversation's flowing like it would between Lagiza and his mate.

All right, mate.

There's so much chemistry, it's like a science lab of talking.

There's fun chat and there's deep chat.

It's like Chris Edmonds is meeting Stephen Hawking.

Jam!

We're hoping through the podcast.

I think it's going really great.

The conversation's flowing like it would between a keyser and his mate.

Or a mate.

I didn't hear that.

There's so much chemistry.

It's like a size-time talking.

There's fun chat and there's deep chat.

It's like Chris Evans is meeting Stephen

Oh, yeah, Dowdy Matsico.

Thanks so much, Dowdy.

Right now, I think it's time that we got my guest back on stage.

Please welcome Jessica Nappet.

Hi, Buckle.

Hello.

Now, Jessica, you told me that you have your own podcast.

And what sort of thing is that?

Yes, it's called Perfect Day.

Romesh kicked us off.

Yes.

Dolly also.

That's nice.

It's good that he's getting a bit of work.

Yeah, I know.

But he, you know, it's good because I think people listen to it because he's quite famous, isn't he?

Jamali Maddox,

he's doing it.

And

my pal Emerald Finnell, I did a drifters special.

And coming soon,

I reunited the cast, yeah, for a little spech.

And coming soon, if you don't mind, guys,

Adam Buxton,

funny, and

not dick.

Bit argumentative, but

so we thought if you guys don't mind, well, Adam has allowed me to commandeer his podcast tonight, so I get to interview him about his perfect day.

So we're going to do a perfect day episode.

Now, what are the rules?

Does this have to be an imagined perfect day, or is this best bits of days I have really had?

So it's whatever you want it to be.

It can be fantasy, it can be memory, it can be whatever you want.

It's just your perfect day, whatever that would be.

And you've got jingles.

Yeah.

Are you ready to be interviewed?

Sure, let's do it.

Okay.

Do we need to say anything else?

Adam Buxton, welcome on to the Perfect Day podcast, Q Jingle.

P E R F E C T

P-E-R-F-E-C-T

D

I mean it's all right then.

It's no I

added one more podcast.

No.

It's no more.

So that's good.

Because you know, I'm only saying that because I feel threat.

I don't like it when my friends do podcasts.

Okay.

Especially if they're going to be better than mine or do better than mine.

I doubt that.

I think yours is going to be an absolute smash.

Well it might be.

It might not be.

It's okay.

It's okay if it's either isn't it?

You're going to be okay with it.

I'd be more okay if it wasn't

and then I'd feel a bit less insecure.

But no, listen, I think it's going to be really good and I'm very honoured to be a guest.

But I only recently realised that I was going to do this.

So I already feel anxious that I'm not going to be as funny as some of your other guests.

Everyone has approached it similarly.

Okay.

In that, you know, they've just answered truthfully.

Yes.

And it's just a wonderful insight.

And also, it's just nice to hear what people enjoy about their lives.

That's all I'm interested in, really.

Let's do it.

So let's have your perfect morning, please, Adam.

Q Jingle.

That's me doing

me being a cockerel.

Very good.

That's pretty good.

We don't have cockerels where we are out in Norfolk.

No.

We have a little bird.

I don't know the names of birds or trees, even though I've lived in the countryside now for over ten years.

I think it might be a tit.

Okay.

And it taps at our window.

Really?

A tappy tit?

Tappy tit.

What does it actually tap on the glass?

Adam.

Adam.

It doesn't say that.

I think they might be a bit thick, thick, some of the birds.

No disrespect to the bird community.

They are mega and I love them.

But

they're operating with very small brains,

some of them.

Even though

they're doing better with their lives than I am in some ways.

So is that how you wake up on a normal day?

No.

This is on a perfect day.

Okay, so your perfect morning is you're woken up by a tapping tip.

Yeah, which does happen.

So my approach to this podcast is: I'm kind of aggregating perfect moments, moments that make me happy that have happened in my life.

Very few of these are imagined.

They are things

that

I particularly love.

But yeah, I like to be woken

on a nice morning, the window is open anyway.

We like it cold in the room in Castle Buckles.

And I love the little bird tapping at the window.

The sun is streaming through, and I'm not feeling stressed.

I don't look at BBC News.

No.

Once the therapist said to me, she'd cut that out.

Don't look at the news first thing.

Yes, so true.

Don't look at your phone at all, really, ideally.

So I try not to do that on my perfect day.

I have slept well.

Yes.

I have not spent an hour writhing in agony in the early hours because of the build-up of wind in my gut.

Oh, mate.

That has become a thing in the last five years.

Really?

Yes.

What do you think is the cause of your...

Let's get into it.

Well, it's going to be diet, isn't it?

It's going to be a combination of age, bad dietary habits that have accumulated over the years.

I have started to address some of these and eat in a different way.

I don't know how much difference it's making.

It's a journey that is stretching ahead of me.

But at the moment, it's no good.

So you just get really bad trapped wind, then what do you do to alleviate your trapped wind?

Do you have to go for like a little walk?

What do you think?

Yeah, so go for a walk to the toilet.

I'm sorry to say that part of the perfect morning for me would be my wife getting out of bed before I do

and saying

and just luxuriate in the just let them all out in the

carnival that ensues.

Yeah, that's why the window

All coming from downstairs until the pain in my lower abdomen subsides.

Thank God the window's open, that's all I can say.

So that doesn't happen on my perfect morning.

No, that doesn't happen.

So just to be clear, not that.

Yeah, I've slept well.

I've only got up once, probably, in the night.

Only once.

I had flying dreams.

Flying dreams, yes.

Oh, you love flying dreams.

I love them.

And you have them, do you have them often?

I've been having them recently.

Cool.

I don't know if it's good or bad.

I googled it, and it's some people there was a suggestion that you feel trapped in your life and you're going nowhere and you dream of escaping or some shit.

Other people were saying it's more about feeling empowered.

Yeah, I'd go with that one.

Yeah.

Superpower, being a bird.

Where are you flying to?

Someone's window to tap, tap, tap.

Yeah, just sort of...

roof height.

Yeah?

Not much higher than that.

And I do it by

paddling, as if I'm swimming through the air.

Oh, wow, yeah.

Really

hard.

Peter Pan style.

Yeah.

Yeah.

It's as if the air has become more dense in my immediate vicinity.

Well, it has, hasn't it?

What you're dreaming about is wafting your own farts away.

I think you're right.

That hadn't occurred to me.

What does it mean?

I dream of escaping the immediate foul

stench that's hanging around me like a cloud.

Imagine rising above it to clean air.

Yeah, that's exactly it.

So you've had a lovely dream.

Lovely dream.

Then it's cold shower time, Jessie.

Cold?

Yeah.

Are you a cold shower guy?

Are you a woman hoffer?

It's one of the things I've been doing to try and reset the old

general health.

Really?

Yeah.

I heard so many people wanging on about it.

I thought it's got to be worth a go.

And so you do this normally, but you're also doing this on your perfect day, crucially.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Because I feel like...

I feel as if there has to be some work.

It can't all be like total sensual abandon and pleasure and luxury, right?

Profound existential pleasure comes from mixing work and play, yes.

Whoa,

cold and hot, yin and yang, plus and minus.

Yes, otherwise,

if you overdose on the bad, that's bad, obviously.

But if you overdose on the good,

that's better, but still

that's fine, can be great, actually.

Yeah, yeah, that's fascinating.

So, you are, you've had a cold shower, you're out, you're away.

Do you have a normal morning routine?

Like when you get down to business,

post-cold shower,

the process of, say, preparing for a podcast.

What does that look like for Dr.

A.

Buckles?

Well,

go to my nutty room.

which is in the barn, which is across the way.

And

generally, I do my journal a lot of days.

We talked about this when you were on the show.

I did, yeah.

So, you journal, do you journal first thing in the morning?

Yeah, but recently, I've been thinking, I'm supposed to deliver a book, I'm way behind, another volume of kind of memoir-ish stuff.

And recently, I've been thinking, oh, buckles, you are doing this all wrong, you jerk.

Don't journal in the morning, do that at night.

But in the morning, when your brain is a little fresher, hopefully, that's when you should be doing book stuff.

Right.

And so I've tried to shift.

So you get the book down, and then what about music?

Like when you're writing music, does that just come to you as and when?

Or do you deliberately sit down and you're like, I'm going to write a song now?

No, that's nice therapy.

I got a guitar when I got married in order to learn how to play kooks by David Bowie on our wedding day as a surprise because as far as my wife knew, I didn't play the guitar.

So I bought kind of a fancy guitar, a Godin A6, beautiful kind of semi-acoustic, and it's got a forgiving fretboard.

So, I could make that sound okay with the chords for kooks.

But then, afterwards, I never really improved.

And after a couple of years of subjecting my friends to horrible David Bowie renditions, I remember one evening I looked across, and someone was just pleadingly looking at me, like, oh, please stop.

And I thought, oh, maybe I will.

And

I put it away, and I became more of a logic user using loops and keyboards and things like that.

But recently, I got the guitar back out and found it was quite therapeutic to just hold it, you know, to cradle a guitar.

Not play it, just hold it and get it.

Well, no, to strum it and things like that.

Right.

But

I got beyond not being good at it, or I made peace with not being very good.

and then I carried on strumming and got a tiny bit better.

And then I found myself writing a song.

Yeah.

And it was the first song I'd written on a guitar.

And I thought it was so good that I sent it to a musician friend of mine, and they didn't reply.

And I really thought that it was going to be like, oh, shit, this is amazing.

This is it.

Yeah.

Oh, man.

And have you still not heard back?

No, I did hear back after about a month.

And they gave me some good feedback, feedback, actually.

Oh, you got feedback.

So they did listen to it.

Yeah, yeah.

Oh, yeah.

They definitely listened to it.

They just said the main note was:

lyrically, you're kind of in the uncanny valley between sincere and funny.

And I'm not sure anyone's ever made that work.

I don't know.

Yeah, I don't know either.

I quite like that uncanny valley.

I went to see on Friday night in Amsterdam pulp.

Oh, wow.

I love the I love the tone of pulp.

Jarvis Cocker's lyrics are so funny

and

sincere.

That's true.

I think he's really, like, it never gets sentimental, it's romantic, but then it'll be hilarious.

You know, do you know, this is hardcore, that song.

Oh, amazing.

And it's just like, it's so sexy, but so funny.

Anyway,

I was thinking, I think that actually does walk the line.

So maybe you're the next Jarvis, you you just don't know it.

Yeah, I don't think I am.

But I'm curious about this.

I think there's something in when you go manual mode and you get away from the computers and you hold a thing like a pen or a guitar.

I think it improves the process, man.

It's very therapeutic, and that's the other thing that I heard recently, which is sort of obvious really, but the value, the practical physical benefits that you get from music.

You know, not only is it fun and nice to hear and well known to be good for the old mental health, but physically, apparently, there are benefits.

And I really do believe it.

And a few months ago, when I was feeling a bit bleak,

I think I listened to this thing and I was like, yeah, okay, I'm going to give that a go.

Listen to less podcasts about how fucked we are and listen to more, make a point of listening to music every day.

Because there were lots of days when I just wouldn't listen to any music because I'd be prepping for the podcast, listening to other podcasts, reading books, whatever it was, listening to audio books about psychology or trying to stuff some facts into my stupid mind.

Yeah.

And actually

not listen to any music for ages and ages.

But now I've got back into the habit and it's good.

Whole albums from start to finish.

Yeah, sometimes if I'm doing other stuff, like that's part of my perfect day, is be doing manual labor, either clearing up or constructing a shelf or something like that, or just organizing things, but things that I don't need to be mentally engaged for necessarily and have music on in the background.

Lovely, I know exactly what you mean.

Something that's sort of like menial

and

organizing things, but you're gonna see a result from it

when you've finished it.

Exactly.

Like one of my favorite days in the lockdown was when everyone was out of the house, can't remember what they were doing, defying the lockdown, I guess.

I finally got round to doing something which I'd meant to do for so long, which was get a load of little drawers and spray them different colours and then label them and put all the shit that was in like the bowl in the hall.

Oh God.

Sort all that stuff into the drawers, at least the stuff that didn't get thrown away.

And so now I've got these little drawers, organized different colours, organizational drawers with things like string,

highlighters,

sharpies, phone chargers, cables, lighters,

post-it notes, clothes pegs.

All this stuff, man.

There's a label for every single thing.

If you've got an old school embossing label.

Yeah, I do, but that takes too long.

Generally, I just put a strip of clear gorilla tape on the front and then write with a sharpie on top of it.

And then you can peel it off if you want to.

This is, yeah, I'm and I was listening to Spotify while I was doing that, and it got to the end of my playlist and it started suggesting stuff.

And it was one of those times when you do think, okay, fair enough.

Good work, AI.

Oh, really?

What did you suggest?

Can you remember?

Fella Kuti,

who I'd heard before, but it was a song, I can't remember,

Something Water, Something No Water by Fella Kuti.

But it was very good.

Like 10 minutes' worth.

And before, I'd always thought, yeah, okay,

good work, Fellacuti, on you go, but never for me.

But this one, suddenly it was like, I get it.

And it was such an amazing moment.

I love

musical moments like that.

Yeah.

Okay.

Q Jingle.

Oh, yeah.

That's the afternoon, is it?

That's the afternoon, because I couldn't really think of an animal that summed up the afternoon.

So you've got a cockerel for the morning, you've got an owl for spoiled.

Dog, dog, walk.

Yeah, but not everyone has a dog.

Everyone has a dog.

Okay, well, we'll put for this, for yours, we'll put you barking like a dog at the end.

Yeah.

What's your perfect afternoon, Adam Buxton?

Perfect afternoon.

Well, I don't mind a train journey.

Oh, nice.

It's moving very fast and it's not delayed.

And

are you in first class?

Yep.

In first class.

No, I tell you what.

Perfect morning.

I wouldn't be in first class.

I would be with all the other people.

And we'd be having a wonderful chat

about ordinary life,

what their ordinary lives are like.

And I'd be very, very interested to know.

With your public.

Yes.

But my wife is also with me.

And we've just had sex in the toilets.

On a train?

Yep.

No.

Maybe not a British train.

Those trains are the most...

Are you absolutely sure?

This is a perfect one, a nice clean one.

Okay, it's a perfectly clean train toilet.

So you're all full of post-coital

excitement?

Not on a train, no.

No.

Well, no, because they're disgusting.

No, but a nice one.

An LNER

or the TransPennine Express.

Are you kidding me?

Right, so where are we going next on your perfect afternoon?

Oh, yes.

I just got an email.

And it says I've been offered a part in a TV show

being written written by a brilliant young writer who has identified my potential to be a brilliant actor if I'm given the right part.

And I'm working with a director who can eliminate some of my worst face pulling tendencies.

Yes.

And they are able to do this without crushing my spirit.

In other words, it's just like the perfect acting job.

And in my life, I've had that only a few times.

And I would say that one of them was hot fuzz.

It was a small part, but working with Edgar, he was a good enough director to get what he wanted from me without having to endure some of my more terrible Jim Carey tendencies.

And it was fun, and I loved it, and the film was great, and it was like, wow, perfect.

So, is it the excitement of knowing that you're gonna, what is it?

Is it a movie?

Is it TV?

It's a yeah, working with

a load of people, being together for a few weeks or months, you know, because usually I love my job, I love my life, but it is quite solitary.

Yeah.

And so I'm doing all, you know, I've kind of carved out this DIY existence, which has so many advantages, and I'm very grateful for it.

But my few experiences doing TV and movies have on the whole been very positive.

Even when the TV show has maybe not turned out the best, it was still wonderful doing it.

Also, you know, getting a getting a nice no-strings attached offer of work on an email, that's a good thing.

Oh, yeah.

The offer is all yours and it's there for the taking.

And you're not, but you're not on your perfect day crucially, you're not actually doing the work.

You've just been offered the work.

We don't have to actually do that.

That's the best bit.

Yeah, that's the best bit.

This is going to be a great job.

It's going to work out fantastic.

It's going to run and run this show that I'm in.

And I'm going to be the best guy in it.

If you were offered something tomorrow, like, is that genuinely your dream right now?

Like, if you were offered a lovely TV show,

would you rather be doing that?

I'd like to do both.

Yeah.

Yeah, yeah.

It would be fun.

Like, the dream is you do a show that you have a part that you only have to film for a month every year, and that's it.

I was pitching a TV show the other day, and I mentioned you, genuinely, and the producer said, Can you get Adam Buxon to be in it?

Oh.

Honestly, that happened to me.

Well,

yes.

The answer is yes.

I think you can get Adam Buxton to be in it.

So

I think people are excited to put you in TV shows, maybe more than you realise.

Well, I might be.

My hope is that I might be entering a new phase of usefulness because I'm old.

Do you know what I mean?

You're getting into swearing grandpa terrorists.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Play some dads and some grandpas.

That'll be fine.

Part of the afternoon, afternoon, it's sunny, by the way.

I like it sunny.

And

it's sunny and fresh.

Every now and again, while I'm working, I'm doing a bit of work, but every now and again, I'll go outside and I'll pee outside.

Oh.

How does it feel when you pee outside?

Why do you love it so much?

Chill-free.

Is it sort of like a marking territory thing?

Maybe, on some level.

Do you ever

pee outdoors?

Yeah, I've been known to have a wild wee from time to time.

Yeah, it's pretty good, isn't it?

But I don't deliberately go for a wild wee.

I'd rather have the comfort of a nice toilet.

Yeah.

And I'd rather have a proper sit-down.

Thank you.

But anyway,

I'm asking.

It's the owl.

It's the owl.

What's your perfect night, Adam Buxton?

Well, it's going to be family supper, first of all.

And I will have cooked family supper, and I will be listening to more music.

My children are there.

They are teenagers at the moment.

And they will have been DJing while I'm...

It's kind of like a scene from a Richard Curtis film.

And they're DJing, they're introducing me to all this mad stuff that I've never heard before.

Or my eldest son, he listens to a lot of the same music that I do.

So he's playing me stuff that I already like, but introducing me to deep cuts that I haven't heard.

My daughter's putting me in touch with hip-hop that I've never experienced before.

My horizons are being expanded.

In the next room, my son is playing the piano.

My wife has a piano in her office.

And he's pretty good at the piano.

And every now and again, we open the door and we can hear him.

Like at the moment, he's playing he's learned surfs up by the Beach Boys.

This real epic.

It's pretty good.

Do you feel proud of your kids when they're being music?

Do you think I did that?

Oh, no, I never think I did that.

I always think I didn't totally fuck them up.

That's genuinely what I think.

I just think, oh, thank God, there's one thing that's good about them.

They like music.

They're good at music.

They have an appreciation for music.

There's loads of things that are good about them.

But those moments, yeah, I particularly enjoy.

It's the supper, though.

Supper was like family supper we got got into fairly late as a family.

In fact, it was the beginning of 2020 that I finally made the edict, we have got to eat as a family.

And

for some reason,

we never got it together to do that before then.

And it always really bugged me because it seemed so obvious that you need that to have a bit of family cohesion.

And so we started doing it, thank goodness, and it really served us well in the lockdown.

And it was good fun, and it's still like a happy family supper because they're not all happy, of course.

But a good one is you can't beat it.

And my son is on very amusing form at the moment because he's a teenager, he's 19,

and he's kind of come out of his shell a little bit.

He used to be fairly dour

and he would be like

at the table, he would either sit with his head in his hands

or with his head far back, like

and he he would be totally monosyllabic, and he was just grumpy as fuck.

He was just like classic Kevin the teenager.

Oh, no, but now he's through that.

One of the greatest days of his life.

What did it take to get out of that?

Well, a couple of years, but it started to things started to go better on the best day of his life, which was when his GCSEs got cancelled in the lockdown.

Oh, yeah.

I couldn't believe it.

He just came downstairs.

He was like, whoa.

This is the best day of my life,

and I really

was pleased for him in a way.

I mean, there have been negative consequences.

He hasn't got any GCSEs, yeah.

That's a whole other story.

Also, his grasp on certain academic things is fairly shaky still.

He's beginning to get into reading and things like that, but it's been a long road.

And the other day, I used the word undulating, and he said,

like that's a word.

But his DJ skills are said so should be a skill.

His piano skills,

brilliant.

He is at one with the universe.

And then he said later in the same conversation,

he said,

yeah, so tomorrow I think,

yeah, I think we should go to the pub as the crow flies.

Oh.

And we were like, oh, hang on, what?

What was the phrase you used there?

It's like, how do you mean?

At the end of the day, we should go to the pub.

Oh yeah, I just said like, you know, as the crow flies.

It's like, what do you think that means?

He just thought it was a thing you can tag on to any of

tag it on there as the crow flies.

And then later he said, um

he's talk we're talking about uh my wife's uh dad who's no longer with us but he was my wife's a lawyer.

Her dad was also a high-powered lawyer.

And uh he was a judge in fact.

And there's even a big photo of him in his judge robes hanging in the very room where our son plays the piano.

So he is perfectly familiar with what his grandpa did, you would think.

But he was like, oh, yeah, I just found out grandpa was a lawyer as well, wasn't he?

And my wife was like, yes.

And, you know, after he died, we had this obituary.

There was an obituary written in the local paper.

for my grandpa and it's hanging in our bathroom.

And she said, you've seen grandpa's obituary hanging in there in the bathroom?

He's like, Obituary?

He hadn't heard the word before.

He's like, What?

And I said, Obituary.

He's like, Grandpa had obituary.

Oh, I'd love to know what he thought.

Did you elaborate?

What did he think obituary was?

I guess just a place with bitches.

Yeah.

But like a really big one.

And grandpa had one.

He just never seemed like the type of person who would have a bitchery.

But he had a bitchery as the crow fight.

Can we conclude this podcast by getting Dowdy back

playing a little bit of a song that you and I bonded over?

Can we say in our podcast?

That is a photograph of Ilkley Moore.

Yeah.

And that is your neck of the woods.

That's my neck of the woods.

Is anyone else from Ilkley?

Yes, you're going to like this one.

Where has thou been since I saw thee

on Ilkley Moorbat?

Where has I been since I saw thee?

Where has I been since I saw thee

On ill clem or tat, on ill clem or bat,

on ill clem or bat

There's been a cotton Mary Jane

on ill clem or bat

there's been a cotton Mary Jane

There's been a cotton Mary Jane

on ill Ilklemoba Tat, on ill clemoba tat on ilklemoba touching mag.

That's gonna catch the death of cold

on ill clem or batat

That's gonna catch the death of cold

Thou's gonna catch the death of cold

on ill clemoba

on ill clemobat,

on ill clem or bat

Then we shall have to bury thee

on ill clem or bat

Then we shall have to bury thee

Then we shall have to bury thee

on ill clem or tat on ill clemoba

but

but

one more time, everyone.

That's not everyone.

It'll clean more buttons.

I'll clear.

I'll clean more buttons.

I'll clean more

time.

Just let that happen.

And it's fuxton down in that secret.

Thank you so much.

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Continue.

Hey, welcome back, podcasts.

That was Jessica Nappett and Dowdy Matsico joining me there on stage in York in May of last year, 2024, at the Theatre Royal.

And I'm so grateful to both of them for coming along that night.

It was really fun.

Don't forget, if you enjoyed Dowdy's music, he's playing that show in London on the 12th of August.

There's a link in the description.

And there, you will also find a few other links, including one to that track by Fella Cootie that I mentioned, which is called Water No Get No Enemy.

Now, if you happen to be going to the Edinburgh fringe this year,

I just want to give a shout-out for one of the performers there.

And also, I believe he is a native of York as well, so we'll keep it on theme.

It's Rob Orton, A-U-T-O-N,

who, if you're not familiar, I would describe as a stand-up who either sprinkles his jokes with poetry, art and oddness, or sprinkles his poetry, art and oddness with jokes, depending on your perspective.

Having written 11 critically acclaimed shows on specific themes, And I'm quoting now from the blurb, Rob Orton is now keen on telling you a story he has written about a man he made up called Cann.

At one point in his life, Cann was the world's number one motivational speaker.

And then something happened.

A genuine original, says The Guardian.

You will walk out feeling transformed and fully alive, says the Scotsman.

That's good.

It's nice to feel fully alive.

Brilliant, says comedian Stuart Lee.

The mother freaking greatest, says James A.

Castor.

A genius, says Bridget Christie.

That's Rob Orton.

And you'll find a link for tickets via Ed Fringe in the description of today's podcast.

Earlier this week, I was in London at the beautiful Union Chapel as part of a bill for a charity show in aid of the PDA Society.

That night I was reading out a chapter from my book from I Love You Buy and it was the chapter that had some of that stuff from the

York show.

It's one of my favorite chapters about going to the movies to see Free Guy just after the lockdowns and feeling a bit out of sorts and grumpy with the world and then being reminded of the happier aspects of family life.

Anyway, I read out that chapter

that evening.

and I had created a kind of visual presentation to go along with it, which I spent a long time doing, but it was the first time that I had done it in front of an audience, so it might not have been the absolute best call, especially last thing on the bill in a hot room when the audience was a little bit tired.

There's a couple of moments I thought, hmm, was this a really brilliant idea to do this for the first time?

Anyway, I hope the audience enjoyed at least some of it, and I was very happy to be part of the effort to raise funds for the PDA Society.

And afterwards, I met a woman, a woman,

who had painted a beautiful portrait of Rosie and it was so good.

And I wanted to give her a shout out because she does pet portraits and commissions.

And I will put her details alongside the other links in the description of today's podcast.

Okay.

A little bit of brightness over there on the horizon, Rosie.

With some of the clouds moving on.

Might even get a nice sunset tonight.

What do you think about that?

I'd very much like to go home and back to the sofa.

yeah okay we're going

thank you very much once again to jessica and dowdy thanks to the live podcast tour crew ben saunders richard walsh annalisa lembo phil turner et al

Thanks to the Theatre Royal crew and staff.

Thanks to Jessica's podcast producer Lucy Topping.

Thanks very much indeed to my producer Seamus Murphy Mitchell for all his support and conversation editing.

And thank you also to Becca Bryars for additional editing.

Thanks to Helen Green, she does the artwork for this podcast, for my books, she helped with the album artwork.

She's the best.

Don't forget, incidentally, that you can pre-order the album and get a signed high-quality album artwork print with your vinyl copy.

If you pre-order, there's a link in the description.

I'm going to take a few weeks off now to do a few music bits and pieces and get my ducks in a row for the End of the Road Festival at the end of August.

But around then, I hope to start releasing new episodes of the podcast.

I think by the end of this year I will have released more episodes than

I ever have done in a year.

It's a fun fact and I can tell you that my first guest for the autumn run will be one of my all-time musical heroes, David Byrne of Talking Heads.

I got to meet him a few weeks back.

I was quite starstruck.

Pretty much didn't ask him anything that I had planned to ask him.

Instead, we just had a good old rambly convo, which I hope you will enjoy.

Until then, I hope things are okay with you, wherever you are, whatever you're doing.

If you don't want a creepy hug, then now's the time to switch off.

Otherwise, come here.

Hey, good to see you.

Thanks for coming back.

And until next time, please go carefully.

It's not getting any less ridiculous out there.

And for what it's worth, I love you.

Bye.

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