Very Old School!

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South Georgia Sean, he's a man of the land.

Crawling through the swamps with his trusty hands.

Alligators lurking, but he ain't scared.

Raccoons and snakes, they know he cares.

He's a trapper of the wild, he won't back down.

In the heart of the south, he's the talk of the the town he's a trapper of the wild he won't back down south georgia sean wearing nature's crown

with a banjo in his truck and a grin ear to ear he talks to the critters like they're family here got possums in a line like they're waiting for a show come on y'all it's trap time let's put on a rodeo he's a trapper of the wild wearing rubber boots sliding through the mud ain't got time for suits he's a trapper of the wild living life real loud south georgia sean he makes the swamp proud

South Georgia Sean got his truck filled with bait He's got a six-pack cooler and it's never too late Crawling under porches, he's got mud on his face A raccoon wears his hat and a wild game of chase He's a trapper of the wild, makes the best out of scraps.

With a laugh and a quip, you can hear the slaps.

He's the trapper of the wild, singing songs to the pine.

South Georgia, Sean, he's one of a kind.

On this episode of the Commercial Bridge.

And what I just thought has been driving me crazy, it's you pledge.

You pledge.

Yes, the mail is pledge.

Oh, pledge and rush.

Got it.

Okay, so pledge.

So yeah, you pledge, you get in, you don't.

I imagine you apply for a lot of them, probably.

Three or four, five, six, all of them.

Me, I would probably do all of them because there'd be zero chance I get into.

Whoever takes me.

Yeah, whoever takes me, I'd be a gamma, gamma, phi.

Was the guy from the nerds?

Delta gamma gamma or whatever, delta gamma phi.

That'd be me.

I'd be the, he's like, he's like that guy from old school.

He started his own fraternity in his bedroom, and now he can just hang, now he's the coolest guy on campus.

The next episode of the commercial break starts now.

Oh, yeah, cats and kittens, welcome back to the commercial break.

I'm Brian Green.

This is my dear friend and the co-host of this show, Chris and Joy Holy.

Best to you, Chris.

Best to you, Brian.

Best to you out there in the podcast universe.

I am watching an Instagram account that I've been watching for a while because my Instagram is fucked up.

Yes, it is.

I love it.

I love it.

I love it.

We got like a lot of new followers on Instagram, a lot of interactions going on on our Instagram because we started rolling out clips from the TCB's Endless Day.

Yeah.

The big birthday bash.

And a lot of people interacting and reacting to

Tigmataro and Ricky Lindhome, who was not part of the Endless Day, was supposed to be part of The Endless Day.

Michael Lee and Black, stuff like that.

So I've been spending a lot of time on Instagram, just like kind of you know, bouncing around and interacting.

There's a guy that's been on my Instagram, my personal Instagram.

I followed him for a couple of years, and I forget the name of the business.

It's not the name of a person, it's like Alabama Fraternity Consulting LLC.

And he's 50, 55 years old, and all of his Instagram is filled with him at fraternity and sorority parties, bars in Alabama.

that's it in the middle

he's consulting he's in the middle of the fray

18 to 22 year old women 18 to 22 year old guys

he's drinking he's funneling he's fuzzing he's

up and he's pitching you his business and that business is don't go it alone i can help you get into the fraternities oh i can tell you what to do what not to do what to wear on the first day of rush what to wear on the first day of whatever they call the male version of that what is it called is it called rush for males uh

it's a bid it's bidding it's bid day or something like that okay

this guy's entire life

is reliving his entire life

his glory days as an 18 to 22 year old that's all he does i don't know how i feel about it i kind of feel like dude really

it's a little weird to be this old and have an instagram filled with you you at parties with kids that are inappropriately young for you to be at.

I think I would feel weird if I was the kid at the party.

They love him.

Okay, he's fucking.

He's a legend.

He doesn't look like a legend.

I'm not knocking the way the guy looks.

I'm not saying I look any better, but I'm saying

he doesn't look like he would have made it in the first place.

Do you know what?

Do you know what I'm saying?

This is what I'm saying.

He doesn't look like a typical

fraternity kind of guy, but he just weekend after weekend, day after day, week after week, it's him either talking in his phone.

I imagine he's got like a Toyota Corolla in his Toyota Corolla, driving down the street.

I got a phone call, 13 out of 20, bid on the first go.

Who you gonna call?

Alabama fraternity consulting.

And I'm like, wow, that's a weird pitch for your business.

For like the University of Alabama?

It is for the University of Alabama.

He is.

They got that

Greek life down there, huh?

It's wild.

It's wild.

Those are the ones that had the show on, right?

Yeah.

Netflix.

Bama Rush.

Bama Rush was one of my favorite television shows because it showed just how ridiculous

the business of finding friends is.

I'm not saying it's right or wrong.

I think had I been...

A different human in a different body with a different mindset, had I at all been cool enough to be in a fraternity and additionally gone to a campus where they had a fraternity, I probably

might have been differently.

I might have thought differently.

I'm not saying it's good or bad.

I'm just saying.

I probably would have done it if I had gone to a school where I didn't know anybody, but I happened to go to a school where I knew a bunch of people.

Knoxville.

Alabama fraternity consultant.

You see this guy?

All right, look.

He's at the bar.

what to do.

Man, you should have called me.

He should have called me.

So it's just

endless feeds of him in his car pitching,

but then

he's at the parties.

He's like on the stage.

He's on the stage.

Yeah.

With all the hot girls and guys.

Unbelievable.

It looks like he's having fun, although that is what Instagram is, is portraying yourself.

Yeah, I mean, if you're the fraternity consulting guy, you're not going to have a boring Instagram.

No, he's hit on him.

He's got a niche.

Now, listen, there are a lot.

We saw in Bama Rush, the show, we saw that there are lots of women that do this for women, right?

There's lots of women that help them prep on how to get into the right sorority, what to say, what to do.

No.

No, but I mean, this guy lives on campus.

You know, he does.

He probably lives in some apartment, some old rusty, crusty apartment he's had since 1972.

Yeah.

And he's just, he never, he couldn't shake the life.

I have a friend who lived, who went and moved to Athens, never went to UJ,

came from Texas.

This is my good friend, my wild friend that we did all this wild shit with as a teenager, including buying pounds of cocaine and catching, you know, playing cops and robbers out the side of my house.

He moved to Athens when he was.

22, 23, 24 years old.

He just went up there because he wanted, he liked the campus life.

When he was in Texas, he didn't get a taste of the campus life but he liked to be on the university of texas campus so he fell in love with uga and all it had to offer and the music scene and the whole nine yards like a gorgeous town it's gorgeous so he became what they call here a townie that's what they call him if you live in athens past your expiration date you're a townie but guess who else is a townie half of widespread panic michael stipe from rem

uh the guy from cracker i mean these people they live up there because they love the town of athens yeah And it is just one big fraternity and sorority party going on 24 hours a day.

He loved it so much that he opened a bar in the middle of downtown and then opened additional bars as it went along.

So he kind of became like a little towny entrepreneur.

My friend did.

I would have voted him least likely to do anything in life.

And he managed to now has one of the most successful.

best reviewed bars in all of Athens.

You'll have to tell me what bar that is.

I'll tell you, it's called the World Famous.

Okay.

It's called The World Famous.

It's a great name for a bar, too.

The World Famous.

Going to the World Famous.

Going to World Famous.

Yeah.

Right across the street from 4D Watt.

So he gets a lot of that crowd.

Comes in there.

He's got a little music room.

He puts on shows.

He had,

what's that band, Milk?

Something about Milk, Mother's Milk, not Mother's Milk, but

I can't remember the name of the band.

They were famous for a minute in the 2000s and something.

They had milk in there.

Yeah, but I went up there one night and the place that you couldn't have fit another human being in there.

It was packed.

It was packed because the singer from this band, they had reunited for a couple of nights.

They played the 40 Wad, and then the singer did like a special thing there.

It was packed.

And everyone seemed very excited that this guy from this milk band was there.

And I didn't know what the fuck anybody was talking about.

Anyway, listen, what a life to live.

What, if you're going to live one life, let it be the one where you're acting like an 18-year-old for the rest of your life.

I guess.

So

I'm not sure I approve.

Like, if that's my son or daughter and they're hanging out with an Alabama fraternity consulting dude, I'm not sure I'm putting my stamp of approval on it.

Right.

But if I take myself out of, you know, if I take myself

the parent equation or the just generally being a decent human being equation for a minute, I'm saying, why not?

Live your best life, dude.

As long as you're not being inappropriate with any of these

don't be the creepy.

Yeah, don't be the creepy old dude.

Just don't do that.

You're already kind of the creepy old dude.

Just by choice of your profession.

Just don't take it to the next level.

Like, you shouldn't be hitting on the girls.

But the kids seem to love him.

He takes pictures of them all the time.

They're always like calling him a legend.

But when you're 18, maybe he's like the novelty legend.

I think so.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I think so.

It's like that guy, Paul, that I used to hang out with.

He was the Pam I Painter boss during the Olympics.

And he would say things like, you're at that age where you're scared of pussy and i we would all laugh at him and now many years later i'm like he was absolutely right about that still am still am still don't know what they do whatever happened to paul i don't know he's he can't be alive he can't be alive that's true

but he was just this

little tiny little painting company come paint your house and you'd hang on ladders now afraid of nothing kind of a dweeby little guy but we always used to think of paul as like a legend he was like you know he's a legend Well, he wasn't really a legend.

He was just a guy who said weird stuff that would drive us from party to party.

So, you know, I think that's kind of where the Alabama fraternity guy consulting, he's got that energy.

Like, he's harmless.

So that makes me believe that there's a good chance he might be harmless.

Because if he was like actually creepy Alabama fraternity dude, I don't think all these kids would be so enamored with him.

You look in his comment section, there's like, you know, you're such a let, you're the dude.

You got me in.

My brother's brother loves you.

Blah, blah, blah.

Come visit.

You know, whichever college i wonder how he like gets them in i mean is it again like with the women words the way you dress and the things you do and say or is he like he's got connections i think it's both probably yeah i think you're you're not going to get in just because you know alabama fraternity consulting guy i don't even know his name but uh you're not going to get in just because you know him but

it helps it helps like if you're on a track to get into a fraternity and it's going to go one guy or the other guy and you use this dude, you know, who knows?

There could be bribes or kickbacks.

This could go deep.

This could be a conspiracy level shit.

Yes.

And I wouldn't

surprise me at all.

No.

Wouldn't surprise me if this guy gets paid $10,000 to help a guy get into a fraternity and three of that goes to the fucking keg fund for the partner, right?

And okay.

Cool.

However you got to do that.

Yeah.

It's not like, you know, I mean, we all treat it like,

I don't know.

It's the FIFA World Cup or it's a fraternity.

Okay.

Honestly, who cares?

Okay, somebody got in, somebody didn't.

That's just, that's life.

Learn that lesson early.

Sometimes you get in, sometimes don't.

You know what I just saw?

It's been driving me crazy.

It's you pledge.

You pledge.

Yes, the mail is pledge.

Oh, pledge and rush.

Got it.

Okay, so pledge.

So, yeah, you pledge, you get in, you don't.

I imagine you apply for a lot of them, probably

for three or four, five, six, all of them.

Me, I would probably do all of them because there'd be zero chance I'd get a taking.

Whoever takes me.

Yeah, whoever takes me, I'd be a gamma, gamma, phi.

Was the guy from the nerds?

Delta gamma gamma or whatever, delta gamma phi.

That'd be me.

He's like that guy from old school.

He started his own fraternity in his bedroom, and now he can just hang.

Now he's the coolest guy on campus.

I bet he gets free drinks everywhere and all that kind of stuff.

Yeah.

Anyway, saw him on a, I was watching a real right before he came on.

He was on a podcast, like a podcast.

There's a guy who does a podcast all about alabama from alabama like and he's must be a student at alabama he looks that young and he's on the the podcast and the guy's treating him like you know superman came on the podcast i'm like maybe we should he's a legend yeah maybe we should get him on i'd like to ask him so yeah so so so many questions um for sure speaking of like

college towns We did this episode where we talked about Bentonville and we were very excited about the prospect that, you know, Walmart Walmart had this big associates party where all these huge A-list singers and actors and whatever else show up and put on this big to-do for the Walmart associates, the Everyman, the Joe Schmoz and the Betty Boops that work in the stores helping us out, check out or stock the shelves or drive the trucks or whatever it is, and not the

high-falutin billionaires that are running the company.

And we got very excited and we thought, this must be a fucking party.

Well, I mean, according to Reddit, you haven't lived until you've been to this party.

Three or four different people said the same version of the same sentence, which was, you haven't lived until you've spent a week in Bentonville, right?

And so we said, hey, if anybody's ever been to Bentonville or knows about this, you got to write in.

And somebody did.

A guy named Craig

wrote in and like loosely knows the commercial break.

I'll just put it that way.

I don't know if Craig is giving up the goose here, but Craig says Bentonville essentially is a college town.

I think maybe the University of Arkansas is near there.

I don't know.

Okay, that makes sense.

Essentially, it is.

And lots of people come in town for the Walmart Associates Week.

It's essentially like a big festival, a very well-run conference where, in fact, the public can stay and play.

I mean, I don't think everything, I don't think you're going to go to the concert or

Benson Boone or

the breakout session.

No, you're, yeah, you aren't going.

You aren't going to be in the projections meeting.

But cool that you can just kind of show up and do a little dance.

Party around the festivities.

Show up at the bars, show up at the restaurants.

We could do the podcast from out there.

I mean, I would think that they're going to have the Walmart studios.

Yeah, they're going to have the whatever studio, the Walmart podcast studios that they've started to roll out only in one place in Tennessee so far, but I'm sure it'll get there.

But I really did think to myself, I mean, listen, I, you know, we had this conversation.

I'm not cucking for Walmart.

They're not a sponsor.

No one's giving us money to say this.

We just want to go for the party.

Yeah.

Working people are our people.

Trust me.

That is the vibe of the commercial break.

We're not a crypto bro show.

You know what I'm saying?

We don't have people in Miami who live in multi-million dollar condos are not listening to the commercial break.

They're listening to a different kind of show.

And you know which show.

I don't need to say it out loud.

But we're the working man and woman show and Bentonville probably represents the one of the largest employers out there I would love to go to Bentonville I'm just telling you we need to put it on the calendar yeah and I don't want to it'll be our spring break yeah exactly to go to Bentonville for a spring break I don't want to go

For the breakout sessions, for the projections meetings.

I want to go for the bars at night.

This seems like actually the best kind of conference we could have ever gone to.

I mean, you know, you've been to plenty.

I've been to plenty.

And the sucky thing about them is having to think about work.

That's right.

Freaking breakout sessions.

Now it's just all party all the time.

Right.

We can nurse our hangovers in the day, party at night with the rest of the people.

I love this idea.

The worst part about a conference, and anyone who's ever been to a conference will know this, is the shitty

fucking motherfucking schedule that the dumbass organizers put together to curb your drinking.

If you don't think for one second that the organizers of every business conference ever, no matter which industry you work in, say to themselves, we have to have the first breakout session at 7.15 in the morning and free breakfast from 5.30 a.m.

to 7 a.m.

is so that you don't stay out till 2.30 in the morning drinking.

You're fooling yourself because that's exactly what they're doing.

And let me tell you.

And that's exactly what you're doing.

And that's exactly what you need to do.

It does.

Well, I'm going to say that's exactly what I'm doing.

No matter what time in the morning, you're still going to party.

Yes.

And then you're just going to be so how many conferences have we rolled through to the morning?

Yes.

I say to myself, from 11 to 3 p.m., my boss is going to be in high-falutin corporate executive meetings.

And that is when I will be in the hotel room, sleeping with my phone right next to me.

So I can text back and say, oh, yeah,

I'm in a networking event.

I had a special meeting with this new client we're trying to do.

I have a million of them.

Yes.

I've been to so many conferences.

I went to so many podcast conferences that I could look at the name of the breakout session and I could certainly pretend as if I was there and probably get 90% of the conversation correct because I just knew it.

And we've all been there in whatever industry you work in.

Team building.

Launch a podcast.

Why are you at Launch a Podcast?

I listen, I'm just trying to keep my finger on the pulse.

I don't know.

Who cares?

I wasn't.

I was upstairs sleeping off my hangover.

That's what I was doing.

I was buying weed down the street

you did in vegas i did

to the first weed store i've ever been to listen that's the way it is i i look forward to the day when we can all just be adults and go to a conference where the first breakout session starts at 11 30 in the morning exactly because then that's we all look forward to we're all drinking on the company dime we know it why fool ourselves let's just get started at 11 30 that way everyone's uh bright-eyed and bushy.

I would say 10, maybe 10.

And then, you know, you just, you do a little work for an hour, break for lunch for like three hours, come back, have another breakout, and then you're done.

Perfect.

Chrissy got it licked.

10 to 10.15.

Yes.

Good morning breakout session.

10.15 to 3.15 nap time.

And lunch.

3.15 to 4 p.m.

Just show us all the slides you have to show us right now.

And then that's right.

Free dinner from 5 to 7, bus bus to the local bar and then after party and then rinse and repeat.

And then also, let's do conferences, not,

you know,

Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday.

So you got to get in there on Sunday night.

Let's do it Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday.

That's right.

Those three days.

That way, you can take off work Monday and Friday to pack and recover, and then you have the whole weekend.

Essentially, you get a week off.

We figured it out.

We figured it out for you.

When the commercial break conference happens, or we have our first cruise or what, you know, break-a-thon or whatever is going on, don't you worry.

There will be no official events that happen before 3 p.m.

in the afternoon.

Nor will there be any that happen after 3:30 p.m.

So you guys are good.

Meet and greet from 3 to 3:30.

If we say hello, great.

If we don't, don't worry about it.

Attendee capacity, five people.

You have to pay for everything.

Commercial break conference.

Can't wait.

All right, let's take a break.

We'll be back.

You make this rather snappy, won't you?

Somebody got me thinking to do it before 10 o'clock.

Hi, cats and kittens.

Rachel here.

Do you ever get the urge to speak endlessly into the void like Brian?

Well, I've got just the place for you to do that.

212-433-3TCB.

That's 212-433-3822.

Feel free to call and yell all you want.

Tell Brian I need a race.

Compliment Chrissy's innate ability to put up with all his shenanigans.

Or tell us a little story.

The juicier, the better, by the way.

We'd love to hear your voice because Lord knows we're done listening to ourselves.

Also, give us a follow on your favorite socials at the Commercial Break on Insta, TCB Podcast on TikTok.

And for those of you who like to watch...

Oh, that came out wrong.

We put all the episodes out on video.

Youtube.com slash thecommercial break and tcbpodcast.com for all the info on the show.

Your free sticker?

Or just to see how pretty we look.

Okay, I gotta go now.

I've got a date.

With my dog?

No, seriously, Axel needs food.

Today is pork chop day.

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Yeah, we were just talking about our Rachel, the

beautiful woman who does does our voiceover work for us, who's like the, we call the voice of God on the commercial break.

So she does all the liners and stuff like that.

And she had to put one of her cats down, Zina, over the weekend.

And

yeah, that is heart-wrenching and heartbreaking.

And anyone who's ever been through it will know.

And we were sharing something I've been saying for a long time: that's the deal that you make.

It's like the unspoken agreement between you and a pet of any nature, of any kind,

unless you're keeping an elephant as a pet or a turtle as a pet or a maybe a parrot as a pet.

The deal is, I'll feed you, I'll house you, I'll keep you warm and safe from the big bad world and I'll take you to the doctor when you need, when you get sick and I know it and I'm able to do that.

And then you just give me love.

That's it.

That's all I'm asking for, a little love.

But then the second part of that agreement is it's highly likely that you will not outlive me.

I will have to be there at the end.

And

that's tough.

It is the toughest thing in the world.

I mean, it's not the toughest thing in the world, but it is very tough.

It's close to the toughest thing in the world.

And a lot of us treat our animals like children.

Absolutely.

They become a part of the family for sure.

Of course they do.

They're a part of the family.

They're a part of your events and your activities.

They're in your pictures.

My life.

Yeah.

And like dogs, you know, cats can be a little bit different depending on which cat you have.

But I was telling Rachel when I was texting with her my condolences that Rachel and I have lived less than a quarter of a block away from each other in three different places.

How that happened, I don't even know, but it just kind of randomly happened.

But we lived down the street when we first started to know each other, and she went out of town on a couple of vacations, and she asked me if I could take care of her cats while she was gone.

Well, I am deathly allergic to cats, cats are not my thing, but I love these cats.

They were really fucking cool.

She got them when they were little kittens.

They were so cute.

Yeah, but they were more like monkeys.

They'd like swing off the chandelier.

Yeah, that's a kitten.

It really is.

Yeah, it was up in the rafters.

It was like in the air conditioning vents.

It was like the cats were all over the place and they were the cutest things.

And I took care of those cats on a number of occasions.

I was so concerned about those cats that one time she left for like a day.

I needed to go take them out one time.

And when I got there, the doors were locked and she forgot to put the key outside.

And I was freaking out about these cats that were not mine, but I love these cats and I didn't want them.

They didn't starve.

I just, I'd never forget that they were like sitting in the kitchen window.

She had like the screened-in patio, and I could get into the screened-in patio.

And she was sitting, and they were sitting in the kitchen window, like pawing at the window.

And I was like, oh my God, I got to get in here.

Some, I had to call a locksmith to get in the door.

It's a weird conversation to have with a locksmith.

Luckily, he wasn't too plussed about it.

He was like, whatever.

I'll just open the door.

He's like, do you have paperwork?

And I'm like, paperwork, bro, I don't know paperwork for these cats.

Anyway, Zina, to you, farewell, my child.

She's in the the spirit world.

Yeah, she's in the spirit world.

With my cat.

With your cat.

With a lot of our animals.

With Nico.

With all the others that we've, you know, with Nico, with Nacho, with Jordan, with all the other animals that we've, all, to all the dogs we've loved before.

To all the dogs and cats we've loved before.

That's right.

And cheer, here, here, and cheers to your many happy passings.

Many happy blessings.

Nico, I can still smell you, and I love you very much.

Nico doesn't smell anymore.

No.

Unbelievably, the dead dog smell went away when the dog actually died so no pun intended

um

i

on

back on the instagram track yes

i recently followed alex cooper and call her dad the commercial break did and up

slipped a

post

that I thought was very interesting and worthy of conversation.

She took a letter from a listener that basically said, It was a woman, and the woman was saying, My boyfriend is really upset about my body count, right?

And

he

can't get over.

How many people you slept with?

How many people you slept with?

And I wrote a comment that got a lot of response where I basically said, it's probably the most childish thing that you can be concerned about, sweat over, be jealous of is someone else's sexual history.

Past.

It's ridunculous.

It really is.

A three-year-old would worry about this.

A 15-year-old would worry about this.

Not a man.

Not a real man.

Yeah.

Sounds like a boy.

Major insecurity.

Huge insecurity.

And what does it fucking matter?

Relationships are built on the new memories, as I put in the comment, the new memories that you forge moving forward, not the conversations about who you slept with before.

And Alex made the point that I've slept with people and I can remember every single one of them.

I can mostly remember every single one of them that I've slept with, and that's true.

And I know Astrid can too.

I'm not asking her to recall that while we're having sex, nor do I care.

I understand that my wife had a sexual history before I showed up, and that doesn't bother me one bit because that's just a reference point in her life, a space and time.

It's a pin in space and time.

And it's really silly to even, I mean, to ask the question, okay, if you really want to know the answer, sure, I'll give it to you if I even know, if I even know it.

But even keeping track of your body count, it's kind of silly to me.

After four or five, it's like, who fucking cares anymore?

Like, what's the difference?

Yeah.

We all have a history.

It doesn't really matter because that's not why you're in the relationship to talk about someone else's sexual escapades previous to you showing up at the front.

Well, depending on what age you are, I think it's a good thing.

I mean, you

have somebody that has some kind of

experience before you and maybe knows what they want a little bit more, has been had what they didn't like, had what they like.

They're able to tell you that then.

And also the person's not pining away like, oh, what did I miss out on?

Yeah.

Correct.

That's a good way of thinking about it.

Like, let someone show up with a few miles on the car

because you just.

Depending on what age you are.

Depending on what age you are.

Okay, let's be clear about that, depending on what age you are.

But someone shows up to your door.

There's a new show on TLC because, of course, leave it up to fucking TLC.

Of course.

There's a new show on TLC that I have not watched, but I've seen clips of called The Virgins.

And it's all these guys and girls who are well into their 30s or 40s who are virgins.

And the one clip I saw was a notable and consistent reaction.

on first dates as soon as the person mentions they are a virgin.

You know what that reaction is?

See you later.

Oh,

out of here.

Because, and part of me thinks, oh, that's harsh.

Like, that's a little harsh, right?

No, okay.

But I can kind of understand, like, I don't want to be your first at this age.

I just don't want to be because you never forget your first.

And I was 15 when I had my first, I never forgot my first.

Imagine I'm 50 and I'm looking for my first.

Like, there's a certain level of attachment that's going to come there.

And second of all, maybe it is, again, doesn't matter the body count, but maybe it is okay if someone shows up and they've kind of shaken some stuff out of their system they know what they want they know what they don't i mean to just be to sweat it is so bumbling stupid it's not even funny it shows how immature you really how emotionally immature you really are insecure insecure go to a tantra conference you go to a tantra conference and the body count is like 70 million yeah there are gonna be four people in the room okay i'm telling you yeah it's gonna be 70 it's gonna be 80 million by the time you leave.

You just don't ask.

If you don't want the answer, don't ask.

Yeah, it doesn't matter.

I have dated some people.

I am 90%, 99% sure.

The body count far surpassed my body count, but it's not a game and it's not a race.

And I don't care.

It doesn't matter.

If you're going to have a conversation about sexual history for safety purposes, to make sure you're having safe sex, to make sure you're into the same things, to make sure that their

sexual past aligns with whatever values you have or morals you want in your life.

Cool.

But don't get upset about it.

Don't be a douche.

Don't be a douche.

This is a good lesson for the kids out there, right?

When you get into your 20s, like your mid-20s,

start know, I've said this a lot on this show, and I think this is the secret to a good relationship.

And I'm about to let you in on it.

Know which hills to die on.

Yeah.

That's it.

I have figured it out, kids.

Know which hills to die on.

There is a lot of stuff, and I mean a lot of stuff, that my wife does that is bothersome to me, that I don't care for, that I wish she wouldn't do, say,

whatever.

I don't care.

I put it out of my head as soon as it comes into my head because that's not a hill worth dying on.

It's not.

I'm not going to tell her that brushing her teeth in that manner makes me upset.

It doesn't fucking matter.

She's a human being.

She can brush her teeth however she wants to.

Right?

Sleeping with the mailman while we're married.

That's a hill you might want to consider dying on.

Yes.

That's the big deal.

How she cooks chicken nuggets.

I don't give a fuck if you cook them in the air fryer or the microwave.

It doesn't matter to me.

I think when I was young, I didn't know which hill to die on.

That's so true.

So every hill

I died on, and that became death by a thousand paper cuts, right?

So know which hills to die on.

And this is not the one because you can't change it.

No.

No one's going to unfuck people.

You know what I'm saying?

So if you really like somebody, just deal with the body count.

It's okay.

And if you don't want to know, if it's going to make you, if it's going to make you upset, if you're going to get jealous, if you're that kind of twinkle toes, if it's really, if you're really that sensitive about how many people someone has slept with, don't ask the question.

Just don't.

Live with it.

Pretend that you know it.

Pretend that it's one and you are the one.

Just do that.

How's that?

Yeah.

I mean, honestly, when I saw the post, it kind of like got under my skin a little bit.

I was like, wow, we're still worried about that stuff.

Oh, there's still very many insecure people out there.

I know it.

I know it.

I feel bad for them.

Yeah, it seems like

it seems like we are all

so concerned

about every little thing.

It's like zero to a hundred in a second, right?

Everything is a reason for everybody to be upset.

I mean, maybe I maybe I consume too much social media and I probably consume too much social media,

but you just watch these reel after reel or clip after clip of people going to z from zero to a hundred over the stupidest stuff.

It's like, he disrespected me.

Disrespected you?

Is that a thing?

Is it a thing?

Just don't worry.

Just go somewhere somewhere else.

Just do something else.

Go do something else.

You know, it's my parking spot.

You're entitled to the parking spot because you showed up first.

Is that the law of the land?

People are definitely on edge.

And I have to say, I mean, we're kind of in that political environment, I think, which bleeds into other areas of your life.

I do think you're right about this.

I think that the politics has either one or the other.

I can't, the chicken or the egg, I'm not, can't figure out what, but by osmosis, the tribalism and the entitlement and all that stuff has just soaked directly into our bones.

And I can say sometimes I'm guilty of the same thing.

I'm not immune to all of the tribalism either, right?

But it's like we get so upset so quickly over the dumbest fucking shit.

And

maybe it would be good for all of us to learn the lesson.

not only about relationships, but about life.

Know which hills to die on.

That's it.

Just let some stuff go.

It's okay.

Good theory.

I said to my friend, I said, I wish we could go back to a time because I remember it when I was a kid.

You would not ask my father who he voted for because he would not tell you.

And I was his child.

Yeah.

And he would not tell me.

Now I know who he voted for, but now that I'm adult, I know who he voted for, but I still wouldn't ask him to this day

because politics was not something that was talked about.

It was considered gauche.

You just didn't do that.

You didn't talk about politics and mixed company.

It just wasn't something that you did.

Religion and politics.

That's right.

Stay away from this.

Those two are not dinner time conversation, and they never were.

And even though we went to church, we didn't talk about religion.

Even though we watched, you know, the nightly news, you didn't talk about politics.

It's not what you did.

And so I wish we could go back to a time.

And I know, listen, I know that in 2025, some political decisions and religious decisions, they like actually affect our lives.

And so we get very upset by that.

I'm not saying ignore it either, but I just wish there was a little bit more like sanity in the way that we handle this.

And,

you know, I understand that political violence also has been like a, it's been a staple of American history.

This is not new political violence, you know, over the weekend, some terrible

murders happen.

You know,

we're all quick to run and figure out who did it and how they felt about the world around them so that we could either score one for us or score one for them.

But we have to remember that there were like mothers and fathers and human beings that lives were affected.

It doesn't really matter who scores what.

The reality is that we're all just like way too hot about this.

And I think it goes back to something honestly as simple as getting really upset.

about how many people somebody slept with.

That's a dumb thing to get upset about.

All of it is.

All of it is.

So anyway, I'm on my soapbox and I should get off of it.

I got a throaty thing happening.

Am I getting sick the week before I decide I'm going to go on vacation?

That's always what happens.

As soon as I decide I'm going on vacation, I get sick.

That's it.

Cancel the vacation.

No Disney kids.

Oh my God.

That would not work.

We had to start planning our Disney vacation.

Like you have to like.

figure out every minute of every day and put it into an application.

Spreadsheet or something.

Yes, or you're never going to go on any ride.

Spreadsheet.

It's like a billion-dollar Oracle application.

Really?

Oh, my God.

Listen, I'll go on this rant.

Let's take a break and then I'll go on this rant.

I'll share it with you.

We'll turn it to something a little more lighthearted.

But anyway,

honestly, just one last note.

My hearts go out to the folks in Minnesota because what a terrible tragedy.

I don't care who the dip shit voted for.

It doesn't really matter at the end of the day.

The people, and I would say this no matter what political affiliation the victims had, it's a fucking terrible, terrible thing.

All right, we'll be back.

We'll talk about something

not that.

All right.

Why don't you text us and we can text back, and then you can text us and reply, then so on.

It's a fun little game I've been playing, and I think you'll be great at it.

212-433-3TCB.

That's 212-433-3822.

You could leave a message too.

If you do, maybe you'll end up being the voice of the show.

But be warned, the pay is not great.

You could go to the website and drop us an email also, tcbpodcast.com.

And while you're there, you can get a free sticker.

Who doesn't want a free sticker?

Just go to the contact us button and ask for one.

Follow us on Insta at thecommercial break and watch the episodes at youtube.com/slash thecommercial break.

Now I'm going to go back to that texting game.

You want to play?

Come on.

Bye.

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So we're getting ready to go on this Disney vacation.

Yes.

And, you know,

I don't even know.

I didn't even know where to start with this.

We like Disney.

I've been to Disney more times than you've been to Disney.

I can guarantee it.

I'm not saying you.

I'm saying you, the listener.

Guarantee it.

Oh, and me.

And you, and all of you put together.

I've been to Disney a lot.

It's something that my parents did for us when we were kids.

The only kind of vacation we took when we we were kids.

And we didn't take, and we didn't go on, we didn't go every year, but we went quite a bit.

And that was the only vacation we ever took.

We never went to like the beach or like, you know, go sightseeing.

We went on a cross-country trip and we went to Disney.

Disney.

That's it.

That's the only two places we went.

So for us, that was kind of like our whole purview.

If we were going to have fun and relax, we were going to Disney.

That's what we were doing.

Disney World down in Florida.

And so, and as an adult, I've continued to go.

I like it.

I think it's cool.

But

the more that I go, and anybody who's been to Disney will know this, the the more that you have gone, the more modern Disney is not the Disney of yay.

It is not.

Because you cannot just show up at Disney World and have a good time.

You now have to plan every minute of every day

all the time.

Or you will not

get on any rides.

That's the way it is.

So now Disney used to be that back in the day.

I don't know, this probably started in the 90s.

They would put these little boxes in front of the rides.

It was called a fast pass.

Oh, yeah.

It was an invention by the Disneyland, the Disney World organization.

Because when you think about it, I realized this on a trip with Astrid when

we were dating.

Like we went on a Disney trip when we were dating.

And I realized something.

Disney is not in the business of theme parks.

They are not in the business of hotels.

The Disney World, like

sphere

universe.

Yeah, the Disney World, Disneyland.

Like I'm talking about the theme parks, right?

They are not in the business of rides.

They are not in the business of concessions.

They are in the business of crowd management.

They are in the business of logistics.

That's what they do.

They have to figure out how you get you from point A to point B and the way in the way in which they want you to do that.

And then they extract your American Express from your wallet every time you get there.

And do that efficiently and do it in a way where you want to rinse and repeat every time.

And that way, if you like the experience and they do it efficiently enough, then they can continue to raise the prices every year and you will come back every time.

They do a lot of things really well.

They do some things I don't think so well.

But at the end of the day, anybody who's been to Walt Disney World and likes Disney in general believes that that's a place they want to go back to.

And the kids buy into it because that's how they get you.

They start you young.

When I was

in my teens and 20s and i started going there on my own i could literally show up at the front door buy a ticket and go you could show up to a ride you could press a button out would come a ticket that ticket would say you'd be back between three and four o'clock and you can go in the back door and we'll get you on the ride just as soon as you're talking yeah that's what i'm picturing like i love six uh six flags yes and so that's what i'm picturing you know is like that yeah you show up whenever and then you kind of just mingle around the park and see what you want to ride and wait in the virtual line yeah that's six flags for you.

But, you know, the six flags and Disney have two distinct experiences.

You're right.

Yeah.

And, you know, you could get stabbed at Six Flags.

It's probably not going to happen at Walt Disney World, right?

I mean, I'm just sure.

Stabbings at Six Flags.

Oh, don't you remember there was like a shooting here a couple of years ago?

Was there?

Oh, a couple of shootings.

Yeah.

I mean, listen, Six Flags, I think, is generally a cool place, too, but it's just two to two different models.

Of course, yeah.

But then you don't spend the night at Six Flags.

I mean, I guess you could, but you wouldn't really want to.

But so now they have this billion-dollar Oracle app that they've rolled out where you have to, a week ahead of time, if you're staying on the property, then you can plan all of, you plan three or four rides per park, that, that, that, that, bop, bop, bop, the day before you show up.

So today's the day we have to get up and plan every bit, every bop, every twist, every turn in our vacation.

And we have 17 children, most of which don't even speak yet.

And we have no fucking clue what's going to happen.

I've been just me and Astrid, and we have no clue what's going to happen.

We think that we can be at one park and make it over to dinner the next park in 45 minutes, but we don't really know that that's what's going to happen because kids are unpredictable and humans are too.

And no one fucking really knows.

But Disney demands that of you, or you will lose.

How will you lose?

You will have to stand in the regular lines that can can be, on average, two to three hours long.

If you go and stand in line for two to three, see, the thing is, now you have to upgrade and buy these extra passes, right?

These lightning lane passes.

I'm not saying this is a terrible idea because I don't really know.

They're in the business of logistics.

I am not.

I'm in the business of paying them to be in the business of logistics

and then begging American Express to take $12 a day out of my pocket until I can pay them back.

But the reality is, is like

you have to have to pay to make sure that you can get on these rides in a decent amount of time.

Because if you don't pay, you're not playing the game that everybody else is playing.

And you will certainly wait in line much longer than you otherwise would have.

Does that make sense?

Yeah.

Let me explain.

If I go to Space Mountain, the roller coaster, the world famous roller coaster inside of the Magic Kingdom in Disney World, the one that's in the dark, that's been there since 1920.

Yeah, I remember that was my favorite.

It is my favorite.

Still my favorite.

Years later, right?

It's a silly little ride, but everyone loves it.

That wait, that regular line, just go wait in line.

Hey, we're walking around Disney.

What do we do?

Space Mountain.

Okay, let's go wait in line can regularly be over two hours long.

Two hours long.

That's two hours.

That's two episodes of the commercial break.

So if I go there and I just wait in line, Okay, I'm waiting two hours.

I've now wasted from 10 a.m.

to noon just standing there waiting for a three and a half minute ride.

But if I spend the extra whatever to get the lightning lane pass, I can go in the quick line and maybe I wait 15 minutes.

Maybe.

But if I don't buy that, then everybody else in the park, the 50% of the people in the park who are paying that extra money are getting the most out of their vacation while the rest of us are spending two to three hours per ride just waiting on it.

How many rides can you get in in a day if you're waiting two to three hours?

No, you can like two, three.

Four.

Yeah.

Four.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And that's if you spend the entire day there.

It's going to be 1,000 degrees down there.

You think I want to spend every minute of the day down there?

No, from 12 to 2, I want to be at a cabana drinking a frosty shitorita.

That's what I want to do.

So therefore, you have to play the game.

Because if you don't play the game, you're not going to get the most out of the experience.

You just literally

stole sperm for it.

The tickets are expensive, right?

They're very expensive.

It's hundreds of dollars a day.

Once you add the lightning thing on there and, you know, you plan it all out.

And then you get a ED package or, you know, a Mickey Snacky package.

If you get the Nicky Snacky package, you're spending a couple hundred dollars a day per person.

That's without the hotel room.

It's incredibly expensive.

And I'm not saying it shouldn't be.

I don't know.

Maybe it should be.

Maybe that's the way they keep it.

Well, supply and demand.

Supply and demand that's right there was this like overarching argument during the pandemic when disney started

reopening the parks after they closed for about a month uh from covid they would let just a few people in and they started slowly ratcheting up their prices and people were saying holy shit it's like really getting expensive but the people who are going to the parks were like wow we can get on a lot of rides we can do a lot of things it's not as crowded as it was just two years ago you couldn't even

the Magic Kingdom was regularly closing the front doors because no more people could fit in.

Yes.

And there are hundreds, if not thousands, of hotels in the Orlando area where people just fly in.

They stay at other hotels.

Disney doesn't know they're coming.

They show up at the front door.

They buy a ticket.

And guess what?

They can't get in because it's closed because the fire marshal says no more pee-pee.

Listen, here's the reality.

Disney had to do something.

So what did they do?

They raised prices in the hopes that some people that can't quite afford it would drop off and decide not to show up at the front door and they could still make the money that they needed to make.

It's a game that they're playing.

And is it the wrong one?

I don't know.

It's capitalism at work.

I don't know if it's wrong or if it's right, but I'm not particularly excited.

And I will continue to go to Disney if I can afford it.

And with so many children, I don't know.

This might be the one and only trip we ever, ever take.

It depends on the fate of the commercial break.

It really does.

It might or might not be the first and last trip that we take to Disney World.

But at the end of the day, if I'm going to go, I mean,

I must, I need to play the game because I'm not going to take all these Twiddlings down there and not go on at least six rides in a day.

It's just not going to happen because then why else the fuck am I going?

To go to see how pretty Disney World is?

It's a lot of money to spend to see some flowers in the shape of a Mickey.

You know what I'm saying, Chrissy?

I mean, honestly.

It seems like a lot to think about.

It's a lot.

That's why we, I didn't hire her because you don't hire her, but there's all these mainly women.

I'm sure there are men out there that do this too, but there are a lot of women who are stay-at-home moms, I would imagine, because that's what they target.

They target stay-at-home moms that know the Disney World layout, Disneyland, Disneyland, Paris, Disneyland, Tokyo, wherever it is.

And they are certified Disney vacation planners.

And what they do is they will for free help you plan your vacation up to and including making reservations for dinners, for rides, and all this stuff.

Well, what's in it for them?

What's in it for them is they get

huge vacation discounts.

Disney often brings them down there for free vacations to show them new rides, show them how to do it.

You're a specific Disney travel agent.

Yes.

And Disney kicks back the money to them, right?

So they get access, I think, to Disney.

They get a commission and stuff like that.

So for the first first time ever, I could walk into any of those parks down there in Florida and you could blindfold me.

And I promise you, I could figure out where I was going.

The first time ever, for the first time ever, we said, let's get a Disney vacation planner because this is getting a little too calm.

This is getting a little out of hand.

I don't know what to do anymore.

Right.

So,

anyway, so figures I'd probably be getting sick, number one.

Number two,

you know, we're going to go down there and we're going to see what happens.

I'll certainly keep you abreast of the

weights.

Oh, you know that.

Oh, it's going to be good.

Listen, I'm also watching a lot of park videos as we lead up into this, just to kind of take the temperature, no pun intended, of what's going on down there.

And it's also, you know, the world, Disney isn't immune, Disney world is not immune to the world.

And a lot of people are getting revved up down there about a lot of different things.

Yeah, people go in there, they're all fussy and angry because they spent all this money and then they got somebody walking in front of them and cutting them off.

And why are you driving that stroller like that?

And I demand this and I deserve that.

The problem is the entire fucking world thinks they're the goddamn king of England.

And that's the problem.

I have my own issues.

I can get a little fussy when I'm driving.

I think you might need to take an edible before you go

into Disney.

Before I go down to Disney?

I don't get hot like that.

Like, I don't, when I go out in the world, I'm not like that.

I mean, I certainly get frustrated at things people do, but I'm not one to start vocalizing

to get in fights, to get upset.

That's not me.

And I hate when people disrespect customer service agents, unless the customer service agents are acting like real assholes.

That's a different story altogether.

But highly unlikely you're going to find that down at Disney World.

But people, they just get so entitled.

It's like they

think they have to have something that everybody else can't have because they are the grand poo-bas of whatever nation they came from.

They think they're Mr.

Beast, who just rented out Disney for a million dollars.

Disney World or Disneyland?

It was Disneyland.

Maybe Disneyland.

A million dollars.

Yes, for one night, for a date.

For a date.

Well, that's what you get when you're the billion-dollar YouTube creator.

We are the 32-cent YouTube creators.

We're the penny creators.

We are the penny creators.

And I can't.

The dime store, if you want.

Oh, we are the dime store.

What was funny is, is that we were talking the other day about

tipping to ensure promptness, which is not really what tip stands for, but this is what this guy said to me, right?

Tip is like an old pirate word or something.

I don't know.

And insure is spelled with an E, I know that.

I understand.

Insure is to like insure your car.

Ensure is to make sure something happens, right?

I get that.

I understand it.

I'm just telling a funny story that a guy

that a guy did when I was at a restaurant.

Okay, all right.

So,

our

Instagram and our YouTube went crazy, right?

This reels getting shared and all this other stuff.

And then we get to 6,500 followers, which is no

feat whatsoever at all.

Kim Kardashian has 162 million followers, and we have 6,500.

But we get this holy shit notice from Instagram.

It's like, you've reached 6,500.

We put together a story for you.

Make sure you share it.

Like through the years, here's your best reel.

Your account is growing.

And I'm like, if you think for one fucking second,

all the sudden you love us, you've shown us no attention whatsoever.

And then all of the sudden, we get dink one extra follower that gets us to 6,500.

And now you want us to share that we're losers?

Fuck you.

Fuck you.

That was so stupid.

I was like, the hell I'm going to share this.

Fuck no.

Well, but thanks to whoever that 6,500 person was.

Yeah.

Jenny.attt.appc.

Thank you.

Love you.

Oh.

All right.

Well, everyone settle down.

We will be here next week, though.

You'll hear new episodes.

That's right.

We think, anyway, unless I'm sick.

And then, I don't know roll the dice I guess here we go

it always figures when you need to be you're at your best you're at your worst that's true that's the way it works but stressful sometimes just to get to the vacation you know yes and we should have never told the kids we were going we should have never told the kids Brian couldn't keep his mouth shut that's my fault that's me that's on me Astrid wanted to Astrid said don't tell him till like the day before yeah and I'm like guess what kids we're going to Disney World.

And

two years.

Are we there yet?

Are we there yet?

Oh, I can only imagine.

Oh, it's okay.

It's okay.

Well, I'll figure it out.

It's going to be a good time.

One way or the other.

Then I'm watching this, somebody put together a reel of kids meeting their favorite character down in Disney World to like a sappy song.

Yeah.

Like freaking out, but like in a good way, like hugging them, kissing them, like crying, you know, to this sappy song.

It was like a minute and a half long reel.

And I thought to myself, all the drama, all the stress, all the planning, the driving, the heat, all of it.

And it will have all been worth it at the end because I will have 3,000 photographs of my children.

That is the awful.

So if we never go again, kids, remember when.

Look through the photos.

You're too young to remember.

Well, you were there.

Listen,

yeah, I'm about to get priced out too, so don't feel so bad.

All right, 212-433-3TCB.

212-433-3822.

Questions, comments, concerns, content, ideas?

We are taking them all.

Or if you want to come see a live taping of the commercial break, we might be able to make that happen.

We already have people on the list.

So let us know at the commercial break on Instagram, youtube.com/slash the commercial break for all of the episodes the same day they air here on the audio and tcbpodcast.com for your free TCB sticker.

Okay, Chrissy, I guess that's all I can do for now.

I'll tell you that I love you.

I love you.

Best of you.

Best to you.

Best of you out there in the podcast universe.

Until next time, Chrissy and I will say, we do say and we must say.

Goodbye.

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